“On the surface, perhaps man scripturally being in charge over women may seem unfair, sexist or overbearing, but this is the reality of the world we live in. The purpose is not about a show of superiority or favoritism ( God doesn’t play favorites ). There has to be one parent with the final word, and thus men and women can’t be totally “equal.” Why ? Because chaos would ensue. If two people ( parents ) had equal levels of authority, I would pity every child…”
FrisbeeGuy87 on Why Woman give birth in Pain and are Blamed for the Fall of Man – (Deleted YouTube Video) January 19, 2010
Why have we accepted that we can’t be ‘totally equal’ and in that indulging in fallacies as potential ways in which assumptions instill fear as to how ‘problems’ would ensue if people were equally empowered in this world. This is a typical example of how through logic/ assumptions and beliefs, we have built a world of absolute separation and limitation through the very concepts that we spread as ‘facts.’ In statements like ‘but this is the reality of the world we live in’ = ‘we can’t change the world, don’t even try’ is implied, and for that, using the example of parents – considering the typical male and female structure - contains the inherent acceptance of social roles as one of the primary points wherein the hierarchical-existence of society is adopted ‘as is,’ which later on extends within any other realms/ sectors of social matters and endeavors. Why? because that’s simply what ensures that no one ever questions the hierarchical structure of the system, no one then seeks to be equal and complies to the adamant status quo even if it implies abuse and separation.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist in a world where there must Always be someone that has the ‘final word’ stemming from an inherently believed sense of ‘power’/ having control over others, as the authority that stands in a ‘superior’ position, instead of establishing equal responsibility toward one’s words and the effect that such words as actions inflict upon the whole which must be equal in all ways and considering what’s best for all at all times.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think, believe and perceive that someone must always have the ‘last say’ in any given moment as a definitive decision that is accepted as a way to stop discord, which implies that we have believed that equal-power leads to inevitable conflict, chaos and further rivalry, without seeing and realizing that we have only believed ‘this’ to be ‘true’ within a system wherein Equality has never in fact existed, it has never in fact been Lived yet it has been promoted as something to fear. Within this, all we have ever complied to is the separation of humankind as individuals that can be ‘more’ or ‘less’ successful according to social roles – being a male or a female – and the amount of money they own, which has determined and is linked-to the amount of ‘authority’ one has which is one of the basic traps wherein we will only hear those in ‘power’ and in roles that are socially deemed as ‘more powerful’/ of authority due to the credentials as values we believe they inherently ‘represent’ and ‘own’ by virtue of their position within a particular social and economic context.
I see, realize and understand that the patterns followed in any social construction have been defined and determined by money as power wherein money decides the type of society that is built, which is a set of norms, rules/ regulations toward the lives of particular human beings in a defined context such as nation/ community/ gender/ race/ economic status, which complies to greater schemes of hierarchical organization of the world, such as world economies, cultural values and traditions as well as political and religious endeavors that may or may not be influenced also by the natural environment in itself. Anthropology, sociology, linguistics and other social ‘sciences’ have focused on establishing the differences between individuals, categorizing society into this dissected scheme that is able to be studied and pretended to be ‘known,,’ as a way of establishing ‘order and control’ which is the positivism implied in our current science – while in fact, the point that should matter for all such sciences is developing ways to establish common sense points to live as equals, regardless of the cultural baggage that is currently being carried as some form of ‘value’ that is defended to be preserved, without even daring to question such ‘values’ because we have deemed that as ‘untouchable’ and ‘too sacred’ as it implies digging into personal beliefs that are usually ‘left alone’ for the sake of not causing further riots in ‘sensitive areas,’ which is also a point of abuse the moment that religions step in the way of implementing a way to live that is best for all in Equality.
The same goes on at the very basic level of establishing a family nucleus wherein the usual belief of it having to be either a matriarchy or patriarchy is entailing the basic submission that must exist in order to have something working/ functioning – which is the primordial flaw that we have indulged in within society, accepting ourselves to take the position of either being more or less than the partner in this relationship that is the most basic unit of society, that will ‘give birth’ to a child that will comply to the idea of someone having to have the ‘ultimate say,’ regardless of it being in the best interest of all or not. Complying, obeying, suppressing any form of expression that could change the way societies work is then stemming from that very initial acceptance of seeing ‘mom’ or ‘dad’ as the ultimate say at home, and us having no say at all in decision making.
Our childhood is a vital point of education where all the basic acceptances at a social level, are transmitted through the very interaction that parents have toward each other. If parents exist in constant conflict, retaliation, desire to be the one with the ultimate say/ win and the other submitting to it and/or even fearing to voice their perspective– the only thing that’s being transmitted to the child that is like a sponge of all behavior, words, information in his/her surrounding is how to find ways to overcome power and control, or become absolutely submissive to a reality that is perceived as unchangeable, which implies diverting such frustration in other means to get a sense of ‘power and control’ over others, which is how bullying emerges, how becoming a constant ‘fighter’ against the social limiting standards – which begin at home - finding ways to get the most benefit from manipulating others to do things for us– and the list could go on and on.
How often parents fear being a ‘bad example’ for their children? I’d say very often – yet the fact is that unless parents themselves walk through a process of deprogramming the basic social conditions that have been accepted and allowed as ‘who we are,’ there will still be this desire to impose or submit to another in order to continue such ‘social roles’ and prevent conflict at any cost. How many times have we thought that we rather keep quiet to not ‘stir problems’ while neglecting the fact that in us ‘keeping quiet’ we essentially become the links within a chain that will go on generationally, creating submissive humans instead of common sensical self-directive individuals that seek to debunk the most common accepted lies and fallacies and question the accepted and allowed forms of ‘order and control’ in society, taking on the responsibility to ensure that no such patterns are ever repeated within the subsequent generations.
There is a lot to be said and exposed from these seemingly ‘acceptable’ ways of thinking such as the quote at the beginning of the post, wherein through fearing ‘power’ and ‘control’ we actually accept such power and control as something real. Basic common sense is not taught in schools – what we accept and allow with the existence of one single word as the starting point and origin of an accustomed behavioral pattern within another being, regardless of it being harmful – is what we become/ accept and allow ourselves to exist as a whole. For that, we just have to look at our legislation books and see the amount of atrocities that had to happen in order for us to write laws that could classify them all and find ways to condemn it, other than looking at the root cause/ origin of such problems in the first place.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to comply to the existence of myself as part of a system wherein my own rights are a proof of all of that which is not given as an unconditional birth-right, wherein I have made myself subject to texts as words that have been written in the name of keeping ‘order and control’ through the instilling of actual fear, due to such laws and regulations being the proof of how far we can drive ourselves as humanity in our thoughts/ words/ deeds, wherein only punishment and condemnation is legally established, instead of first looking at the cause/ root of the problem and working toward the correction and reform of such cause/ root of the problem, which would prevent the growth of laws and regulations to classify human behaviors that could be instead prevented and stopped before manifesting as a regular pattern, and realizing how they have been the product of a society wherein the most basic principle of Life in Equality has never been existent.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that if we live in a society wherein there is a constitution that ‘defends my rights,’ that I then had nothing to do to better it/ review it, as I believed that everything that any other person would be/ live/ do would fall within the category of ‘being abiding to the law’ while in fact, this is the type of gullibility we have all accepted as a way to not question the application and validity of words implied in laws/ constitutions, ignoring the obvious evidence that there is no sense of law and consideration of Equal-Rights between all human beings from the very first moment that I accept one gender to be above the other as a general social, political and economical factor that determines the lives of human beings in this human construct that is ‘society.’
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to as a child, become used to having one of both parental figures as the ‘dominant/ strong one’ and the other as the ‘submissive/ weak one’, wherein I then learned that the way to impose my own will was through exerting control over others, stirring conflict and always having to ‘battle’/ oppose another to finally establish ‘my way’ of doing things, without ever questioning why I always had to fight for my right to be ‘heard’ instead of simply being able to communicate and agree on what is best for all to do/ be and say in any given moment/ event/ situation in our lives.
I realize that in my case specifically, I learned that the one that gives the money has the ultimate say in terms of buying/ consuming and further expanding the ‘wealth’ of the family – while the moral/ educational authority has the ultimate say toward the education of the children, in both cases neglecting the other side as having equal decision-making stance, due to the accepted and allowed and unspoken agreement of always having someone deciding for us, instead of establishing equal and communal agreements that consider what benefits All members of the family, including the child as a pertinent decision-maker from a young age through deliberately integrating them within family conversations as a way to ensure they grow up as self-aware beings of the responsibility that is entailed within coexisting in a world with others.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to live in a society wherein children are made subject to the decisions of the ‘elders’ as parents, without having any window of opportunity to support them to also speak/ share and be part of the decision making/ interactions within the family nucleus as parents, which actually leads them to become beings that see themselves as ‘outsiders’ and having ‘no say’ within any social/ family matter, which becomes an actual personality-maim to any living expression that could have developed in a healthy self-relationship if parents would have learned how to integrate the child from a young age in decision making conversations and establishing constant communication with children instead of leaving it all to the ‘educational system’ to do that for them.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to accept the ‘authorities’ in this world from the initial moments of my interactions within society – which is family – wherein I learned that I had to comply to my parent’s will and decision, wherein I was only told what to do/ what not to do without any further explanations, within that becoming used to abiding to the law as a system that does not consider the actual needs, requirements and self-correction for such habitual patterns that may induce harm and conflict, but instead simply ‘fear’ committing such actions, fearing asking about them and sticking to the rule of thumb of approving and disapproving without having any space to further discuss/ communicate How and Why such laws exist and are ‘acceptable’ as a category in itself in the first place, instead of addressing the problem and finding the cause/ origin to be corrected as an initial step in the first place, which begins within the education at home.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to live in a system where the ultimate say is nor a male or a female but money as the actual control point that dictates and mandates the decisions in this world in all spheres and levels of our interactions, which is how and why the importance of removing such basic conditions and limitations to life within ourselves, stems from the realization of who and what we are as Equality of Life and educating ourselves to understand how/why we separated ourselves, which will reveal how our own monetary system is currently re-enacting and perpetuating the same conditions of separation with no aperture for dialogue to ask pertinent questions as to How we have become so imbued within the current monetary crisis and world-wide financial noose, that we have forgotten to ask the most basic questions such as what is money in the world in the first place and how we have the absolute ability to change how it functions.
I commit myself to expose the most usual lies and social stigmas embedded at a cultural level that is preventing ourselves from realizing the actual fact that it is only through removing the conditions accepted and allowed as ‘differences’ that we can come to the realization of all human beings and living beings being able to live within a single system that promotes Equality as Life, wherein gender roles will come to be a single identification of the physical body design, but no longer a way to define and constrict the social rights, virtues or perceived inabilities that have maimed human societies through the orders of religion and tradition as considerations for law-making processes.
I commit myself to stop within myself any form of belief that would consider me being ‘different’ to any other human being, from gender, nation, race, beliefs and any other point that is currently ‘socially acceptable’ as a way to maintain the differences/ separation between humanity – within this, I stand as the point that represents one single value: Equality as Life, wherein all men are actually equal and living as equals which requires a complete new system that can ensure such words are lived in a physical and functional way and no longer having to be ‘defended’ through righteous acts of violence and wars, which indicate that we have missed the very basic premise of beingness in this world as Life, which doesn’t require to ‘strive’ to be.
I commit myself to provide common sense and support for beings that are currently being trapped within the gender-roles within society and believing that being a male or female in any way represents one or another form of limitation – in this, I commit myself to promote equal living abilities for all beings, including animals and the consideration of the environment wherein we as ‘human beings’ won’t exert our own ability to abuse over nature and the animal kingdom, as we will also consider them in an equal way within all decisions and choices we vote upon in order to establish Equality as Life.
I commit myself to continue educating myself about how the world works, how we have existed as a perpetual stigma toward our own gender based on what we have accepted and allowed in a blind manner as ‘education’ which has been indoctrination to continue the ways of a system that only could thrive if inequality is existent.
I commit myself to walk my own mind to see where I could still harbor this ‘gender roles’ as dictated by society, and within this ensure that whenever I speak, I speak as a living being that holds no preference for a particular gender, but represents the words that I as a living being see are pertinent to communicate to re-establish the will of Life as living words in each one of us, which is a process of Self Honesty that we walk and share at Desteni.
“I commit myself to show why and how – the only solution to ourselves, humanity and so this world: is ourselves within ourselves as God/Energy-Authority/Consciousness control of separation, taking responsibility and walk ourselves into and as equality and oneness with and as the physical-body, and eventually this physical existence through and as the process of writing, self-forgiveness and self-corrective application. To, as we stop the separation within, and standing and living absolute equality and oneness as ourselves with and as the physical, we will so stop the separation without, and walk this world/current World-System into and as a System of and as Equality and Oneness, that ensure this world of sacrifice/suffering stop in the name of money, for each to have an equal and one opportunity Life/Living, as we stop the sacrifice/suffering to our own physical-bodies in the name of Energy/Consciousness.” Sunette Spies *
The World’s Great Divide – The Soul of Money series