Basically the points I wrote in last blog entry were pushed further as I spent more time with another. Certainly was quite cool being with someone without having to actually be ‘doing’ something, merely sharing a moment together. My ‘friend’ E. just left today and it was cool being with him. We had ‘fun’ our ways, we spent lots of time together for quite some days mainly walking around, chatting, drinking coffee, eating and me seeing how he patiently rolled his cigs. lol. I had my time on wednesday to be alone and it was cool. This experience of having ‘other kind of friends’ was quite relieving because this isn’t a someone that is wanting to ‘get something out of me’ but merely spending time here. Thursday he came to my house and we played music which was cool goofing around a bit with music playing bass, keyboard, guitar and changing instruments… then meeting his sisters was cool, I was much more here and stable and it’s cool. I can’t really explain why I had a cool time with him even though we didn’t did ‘much’ but it’s also seeing and testing myself with another one.
I ended up explaining to him about Desteni and the portal and self forgiveness and going to SA etc. He understood basic points yet he said ‘it’s a bit complicated’, he definitely doesn’t believe at all in portal or stuff like that and he probably thinks that they ‘gathered’ all this information from what’s already available here to share and make as a statemente. Well I didn’t push anything, just brought common sense and he didn’t reject it either. I experienced a bit of uncertanty and hesitation to shar ethis in fear of he thinking that I’m crazy or looney for ‘believing’ these kind of things yet, I explained it isn’t about the portal or believing in dimensions, but listening to the message and what’s practical for our life. Explained about us being sometimes defined and moulded by dna factors and how we are able to change and stop such preprogrammation within ourselves which he undrstood and later on, I found out he had undersdtood it as while his sister came here to pick him up she was sharing how she had been depressed and on meds and he said: well you just don’t have to program yourself that way " lol so I smiled because then I knew that all I had shared he’d ‘understood’ from the point of us being able to stop programs and change our program to something that’s best for all, quite simple and he seemed to get it, so that’s cool.
I also went through many stuff from my past while being with him becuase we were in my ‘old’ room and I have books and stuff that ‘remind me’ of my past and so it was quite a shock remembering some things from years ago, from how I had encouraged our mutual friend (another E. ) to smoke weed for the first time in his life and drink and all that. Also with regards to my ‘friends’ of the past and the stuff I shared and lived with them… reviewing relationships, my ‘ways of being’ in the past and many things. But it’s amazing how mind goes into ‘oh I have a good time with him, I enjoy myself with him, we should be together’ lol thank anu he doesn’t think like that at all and so that’s quite awesome really… stopping all the programs that usually run when some ‘identification’ like that happens… systems identified with systems I know but yeah, maybe all that I enjoy is being with someone that also lives in the simplicity of being here, not living in anxiety or worry and being stable and constant no matter where or with whom. That was it, so I enjoyed myself as him as well…..
We went to a ‘bday party’ last night and there was people from colombia, chile, france, germany and other cities from mexico lol was cool seeing how these guys move themselves to go to other countries and keep doing their thing.
Was also cool entering chat after some months and being with all in it and merely sharing whatever is here… cool most are being stable and yeah now it’s all about supporting each other all times, an agreement with all lol that’s cool.
Also stopped the mommy MAtrix system from worrying and being concerned about him being sick etc, he got much better and that was it. At times when I said ‘oh it’s cold put on your jacket’ I felt bossy once again and lol reminded me of this when it also happens in conversations – me being bossy system – and so I stopped and he said: hey hey what’s up with what you explained to me then eh? – meaning stopping our mind as what we think we are and our habits etc. So that was cool lol I’ll keep an ‘eye’ on my breath better than being talking from preprogrammed stuff within me that isn’t me at all.
So he isn’t a ‘friend’ per se, I explained is me just sharing myself with another one with whom I don’t have to be anything else to just ‘be’ lol, and same happened with him so friend is but a definition for someone that is related to you but he doesn’t even live here so it’s like spending time few times a year together and that’s it.
That was it, enjoyable yes, he’s gone and I remain here