These last two days I’ve had interesting points that I had to face.
On Friday I realized how this person that used to support me in the workshop before leaving to SA is now acting in quite a spiteful manner, in a half-joking way basically ‘throwing rocks’ as we say here towards me due to having forgotten some of the process of how to work with the various techniques as they require quite specific points to take into consideration for the making of etchings and so forth. The guy has been criticizing the point of being bald, me talking about what I am into with others and so forth – I can definitely see here just a system reacting to something that doesn’t ‘align’ the secure-points of usual systems that align to the system and conventionality of what they believe is how things should be. It’s been interesting as this point has developed since I got back, yet I have to stop participating in any form towards his own resistance otherwise I’d be playing the game and eventually creating an uncomfortable situation within myself. It’s quite fascinating to see this because before this same person would be quite unconditional towards myself, and because I left the workshop one year it’s as if he wanted me to ‘fail’ on doing things and starting all over again, quite a spiteful manner as that’s ‘who he is’ and I knew this side of him towards others but somehow I had a ‘special treatment’ because I used to spend a lot of time in that workshop and so forth – but now I don’t and so probably something bothers him. What I’ll do is if the point compounds and gets to be quite directly spiteful, then I’ll simply open up the point straightforward because it’s definitely not cool having to co-work with someone like that, he’s almost like the teacher there so, best is to have things in-line and direct than going half-jokingly being spiteful.
Anyways, on friday I went to a concert and while waiting in line we I sort of joined in a conversation that some guys started having with an older man that was in line before us and he started sharing how he actually liked this music because of his son and started sharing names of bands and so forth – so I started talking with these people about music mostly and this man started flashing his ipod and surfing the net and blablabla lol I immediately noticed he was a rich man, those type of ‘open minded’ people that seem quite cool and open, yet making remarks on the other guys being of ‘good class’ and having exquisite tastes in music – you know he’s that type of person that will go to Italy just to see some italian progressive concerts with his son – well, I stopped from judging the points that I just mentioned and focused on just getting along and talking and hearing these people speak – then a comment about hair came up and so this older man said ‘please don’t offend the present here’ and he said something like ‘here the lady has a shaved head’ and so he asked me why i was doing it and when I mentioned equality and the stopping of being an image as well as a point of commitment to myself he made the type of gesture that signifies ‘yeah yeah yeah, dream on girl’ and then he started making comments about me having a ‘nice face’ but that I would look better if I had hair and that the next concert he wanted to see me with hair and that a woman has to be sexy and that I could be very attractive if blablalblablaba, in that moment I simply wanted to kick his balls lol no seriously I simply stood up to that line and said well, that’s precisely what I’m stopping with shaving my head and it’s about a principle not preference or looks – and then he asked ‘Well I’d like to know about this… ehm.. philosophy, tell me about it’ and just when I was starting to explain, he saw this guy entering the concert and he told his son that ‘x x’ was there and that he should go and say hi to him – and then he whispered how that xx guy was the son of one of the owners of the biggest tv-company/corporation in the country meaning, they shit money – and then this old man said ‘Yes, that’s so great about school, one make all these type of relationships ‘ – meaning his son and that xx son of rich were schoolmates – I mean, the whole point of me standing next to these people by default was rather interesting as I had to prove myself and how I communicated with them – before I probably wouldn’t have communicated with them or would’ve been simply rude to them at the end – this time I pointed out the necessary, made sure I explained the point yet resentment towards rich people emerged on how they were there just speaking about their trip of pleasure, wanting to make business with the other guys and talking about all these points of being people ‘with class’ and so forth – they seemed jewish lol, so we know they all love to make relations to people, they are very open yet they seek something for their own well.
Anyways, I simply ‘lost’ them the moment I got into the concert place and simply realized how I could simply not ‘follow’ with these people, they are simply in a complete different mind realm, one that regards itself as better than the rest, one where they simply seek to expand their already created empire that seeks for more.
So the band is actually cool, the singer said that this planet’s being trying to kill us even before money existed – and then mentioned that musicians are cowards and that If we’ve ever met and been with a musician, we would most likely know this, I smirked as it reminded me how most of the beings I’ve been with in my old time were musicians or having to do something with music and they were all escaping from facing themselves here. Yet the lyrics of this band are quite cool, a cry from humanity in an end of times scenario type of lyrics. At the concert there are always these type of people that go there to simply drink and get drugs as if it was a usual bar day, just because they have money they go to these events not giving a fuck about music- there were some women int he ‘vip section ‘ at the top of the place that were speaking a lot even during the silences that the music had and so we all pointed this out to the band as well as the guys in the band realized and they asked them to be quiet, the women – swollen in their pride backed up with money – got ‘offended’ and started blabbering yelling back at us the public and the band… eventually they left and the guy behind me with a semi-shaven head said ‘yeah, this is the victory of the people!’ lol we both laughed and the show continued. Money creates abuse of power and these type of situations, it is basically impossible for me not to go seeing the injustice that exists in the form of inequality – these band sings ‘Hang on to each other’ – it is a point of motivation to keep going, there are certainly people I stand up for and equal to, there are those that are certainly living in their bubbles of pleasure where their money makes them feel ‘more than’ the rest of the entire world. The point is I did notice again facing the point of holding a bit back towards these people that I perceive as snotty due to the amount of money they have – so I have to forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to hold back in a single moment by creating and holding an idea of these people being ‘more than me’ just because of their money – pff I can’t believe how I accept this, it is not what I demonstrate towards them but this actual ‘feeling’ or ‘experience’ existed within me thus, it has to be pointed out because I realized I had to do an ‘extra-effort’ to actually stand up to the point, as if I actually cared on how these people perceived me, and the comment that old man made about me and probably looking great with hair blablbla, quite a fucked up thing because I did place it back to saying well this is why I am doing it as well meaning to stop that fucked-up perception point yet I allowed myself to get sort of ‘angry’ or ‘offended’ or what the fuck not I can’t pin point the experience – I kept thinking how if I want to go into actual position of politics or something alike, I would have to deal with many pricks like these that only care about the image presentation of people to decide how they ‘categorize’ them.
What I noticed is that it is much easier obviously to deal and communicate with people that are seeking a revolution in how things work obviously, like these guy behind me, we simply stroke few words on the situation and the abuse of power existent because of money and there was this empathy, instantaneously – in that moment I realized what the singer in the band shared is obviously true: we will always be more than ‘them’ – meaning ‘them’ as people in power, people that abuse others to have their benefit – so this is how Equality will be established and I can say is that I am gladly working towards this point, even if it’s hard to get along with these type of ‘powerful people’, I behaved ‘politically correct’ – lol seems I’ve learned some points from my past on seeing how some members of my family behaved on these points wherein they had to treat with people that were stabbing their backs, yet the ‘relationship’ had to be maintained by politics. Quite fucked up but, have to take all people as equals and within this simply remaining in my ground no matter what, not allowing but a single ‘refraction’ to feel as ‘diminished’ to anything or anyone – this is vital for me to walk because that indicates participation within the infamous superiority/inferiority construct that exist in all of us.
Anyways, this was friday – the taxi driver asked why I was going all alone to concerts, I said I had no one to go with he said I should get someone to come with me, I replied that that will be rather difficult to find.
Well lol, what happened with these rich people is that they were pulled in backstage and vip section due to this xx guy son of xx super-power-rich man, just another confirmation on how money moves seas.