I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have a gender definition have power over life through participating in self-definitions based on being a ‘female’ or ‘male’ and perpetuating the games of self-interest that both females and males participate in, wherein all that matters is ‘winning’ as the strongest sex/ gender, and in this neglecting everything and everyone else in reality that is suffering the consequences of us, human beings, being very busy and preoccupied only satisfying our power-games which create a ‘good’ or ‘bad’ experience within ourselves, which is in fact a spiteful game against life.
I forgive myself that I ever accepted and allowed myself to take ‘pride’ in being a female due to recognizing this ‘energetic power’ over males (Read ‘supervixen’ for further context on that.)
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to link ‘femininity’ with power over males
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that because I am a woman, I must be desired by all males
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to program myself to be a woman that uses her ‘power’ in order to lure men into a point of attraction due to the power that this implies as an experience within me
I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to see women as powerful for the ‘energetic presence’ that they impose anywhere they are, without ever realizing that with me complying to this belief, I was giving permission – accepting and allowing – the existence of the energetic presence that a female expression and a male expression have, wherein the female is the ‘positive’ energetic manifestation and the male is the ‘negative’ energetic manifestation, which is how I now realize that the power that I saw myself endowed with was in fact nothing else but an energetic presence that I diminished myself to as a form of power within me, within the realization that males would be usually following behind females like ‘dogs behind bones,’ which implies a very specific way of defining the relationship that I defined between males and females
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to keep males as ‘followers of a female’s flesh’ and nothing else, which is a despicable way to generalize human beings according to a particular gender, wherein I was confirming their energetic-stance and the apparent ‘power’ that females had as such ‘vibrant expression’ and ‘glowing aura’ which was actually and in fact part of the manifestation of who we have accepted and allowed ourselves to become as males an females in this reality. To understand this, read the Heaven’s Journey To Life blog The Energy of Adam and Eve: DAY 58
I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to ‘shape’ my personality according to the stereotypes of women that could be tagged as ‘femme fatale’ due to the power that I saw they had toward males, wherein they were able to have males ‘at their feet’ and treat them like scum and still ‘have them at their feet,’ within this, creating an absolute point of inequality and abuse that stems from actual vindication of the perceived ‘weakness’ that is commonly associated with women, without ever questioning why both weakness and strength had to define a gender in the first place and why could they not be equal.
I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to deliberately play games to tantalize men and get a kick out of it, meaning, getting a sense of empowerment every time that I knew I could simply vex them and bother them, even piss them off deliberately but they could not hit me back or offend me back because ‘I am a woman and cannot be hit/ offended’ because of the stereotypes in society that I used to my benefit, wherein I would feel offended and even angry whenever women were portrayed as ‘weak’ and ‘powerless’ and ‘delicate’ – yet use this delicacy and inferiority in order to protect me from being at the same level of males and within that, protecting me from being done the same onto me that I would do onto males, just for fun.
I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to deliberately create a stance toward males of strength and superiority due to being covering up and making-up for the usual perceived idea of the feeble, sensitive and weak females as the concepts that are usually accepted and allowed in society, wherein I would then equalize myself to the ‘male stance’ Yet, wanting to keep my privilege of ‘being a female that can’t be touched/ hit back’ by males.
I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to be a feminist for a while in my life, just because of me perceiving that we were in fact ‘more powerful’ than males and that we had been deliberately disempowered throughout history, satanized and even burnt like witches whenever this ‘charm’ would tantalize too many males, which means that my stance of ‘strength’ as a female, was not in any way who I really am, but just a cover up to the history of women/ females in history and me trying to make up for it by creating the opposite polarity within me, without considering that in doing this, I was in fact simply confirming that we were in fact either weak or more powerful, both points equally defined by ‘who we are’ as energy, and not as the physicality and physical reality that we are as females and males as physical bodies.
I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to create my personality, myself, my self-experience as a mind that is perceiving herself to be ‘more than males’ and having ‘power over males’ and equally powerful to males, which is in its overall starting point a defense mechanism to the historical prejudices that have been adjudicated toward females as weak, powerless, voice less, submissive and ‘behind the male,’ of which I saw myself as the ‘savior’ from continuing such image of females within that past stereotype of inferiority against the males.
I see and realize that all of these personalities and overall power-games that I played in my mind were based on polarities of being over and below the male figure as either strong/ weak according to how I wanted to place myself ‘as a female’ in a position of power over males, which means that I gave permission and continuation to the current state that we are living in/ as humanity where both genders signify the basic point of separation between human beings that should regard the physical equality and oneness and stop any form of power-games at energetic levels, that only perpetuate the mind system’s energy outflows that we cannot even see or be aware of the consequences we are creating every time that we accept and allow ourselves to play either the weak or strong sex/ gender in society as either male or female.
I realize that even though I have been aware of the point of Equality and Oneness, there are points that are embedded at a physical level due to how I have programmed myself throughout my teenage years, watching females on TV and in the music industry that represented ‘all that I wanted to be’ which is the woman having power over males but from the starting point of having felt subject to ‘the male dominance’ in society.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to identify with lyrics, books and anything that would speak about females being these magnificent beings that had nothing to do with the more mechanical and savage males that only sought females for flesh, without realizing that in such identification, I was becoming part of the usual separation between genders as a way to perpetuate the power games that are currently escalating toward the empowerment of females by making males ‘inferior’ and using sex as a way to reinforce the patterns of dominance and submission that escalate to the current hierarchical state of the world in absolute inequality.
I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to actually get trapped in power games and having to keep this personality as self-definition based on the gender that I am, without actually being aware of how this only kept myself occupied within my mind, ensuing separation from the realization that who I really am is and exists here as the physical, that doesn’t require to be constantly fighting against/ outdoing the ‘counterpart’ as the male, in means of perpetuating a sense of power and superiority, which would create a ‘good experience’ within myself, in this forgetting about the rest of the world that is in fact the consequence of us having accepted and allowed energy as a point of self-definition/ self-limitation within hierarchical values that are used only to perpetuate the system of abuse of Life, and in that: we are all responsible just by playing out the usual female-male power games of attraction, seduction and eventual engagement as energetic relationships that were in no way based on the consideration of Life in Equality, as the physicality that we are in fact as human beings.
I commit myself to stop any inner-experience of ‘being a female’ and equating this to ‘feeling powerful’ and ‘having power over males’ specifically, as this is only playing out the counter act to what I had perceived as female weakness and feebleness that in no way consider the stability and physicality of who we are as physical beings, but only regard the energetic presence that is the very system that has transformed life into a mere energetic fix that we have all been participants of throughout human history.
I commit myself to stop the personalities that I acquired from people in popular cultures, specifically women that portrayed themselves as ‘femme fatale’ and in that, debunking my own ‘superiority stance’ toward males to equalize myself as any living being in the consideration of life and physicality, and not gender and energetic power-games that would define a relationship between a male and a female.
I realize that this is the primordial point of physical separation as human beings that we exist as, due to our physical bodies being different – however, this does not mean that one is ‘more’ than the other and it is thus our responsibility to, for once and for all, stop all attempts to vindicate females as ‘more’ or ‘less’ than males – and vice versa – in order to establish one single principle that guides the lives of not only human beings, but all living beings in the consideration of Life in and as Equality and Oneness, wherein this Equality wherein this Oneness is not a mind-experience based on the fusion of the ‘poles’ as chemical marriage, but an actual physical one plus one relationship and agreement to work together to live as equals on Earth, honoring Life for the first time which we had neglected to a mere background where no Self-Respect as Equality existed.
I commit myself to expose feminism as the counter-act of machismo, which stems from the ‘outdoing’ and trumping of the power-game played by both genders when defined according to energy and not the obvious physicality that is equally composed by the same cells, organs, tissues, bones and brain that requires the same nutrients to live, that develops the same way in physical reality wherein no ‘superiority’ or ‘inferiority’ is visible, but it only exists in the mind of human beings as an excuse to perpetuate the conflict and rivalry between males and females, which is unacceptable, unnecessary and must be stopped.
I commit myself to walk my Self-Agreement wherein I ensure that who I am as the relationship with myself is not defined by a ‘gender’ but instead as a physical being that is able to stand in and as Equality with the totality that is here as Self, where no genders define what is life and what’s not life or ‘less than’ as all is existent in an equal stance in the measure of life – thus we stop the power-play between males and females in the name of Life in Equality.
Desteni I Process Relationships to learn how to remove the conditions we’ve learned from our past as human beings that were existing in self-definitions of power-control and energetic-luring as the base foundation of ‘human relationships’
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Blogs:
Why the Oneness Experience do Not in fact Exist: DAY 59
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Day 59: Word of God
Day 60: The PHILOSOPHER’S STONE
Interview:
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Life Review – How the Personalities shape the Physical
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Reptilians – My First Introduction to Love – Part 53
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November 23rd, 2012 at 11:12 am
[…] that I grew up watching and that I have for sure written about Day 24: Supervixen and Day 60: Femme Fatale « but I also obviously had all these males on the screen just going being overtly ‘expressive’ […]