Category Archives: addiction

594. Who Decides?

Or how I’ve been able to establish a pillar of support for myself from the time I decided to ‘kick a habit’ and get to know who I am as the authority of myself.

Last week there was an interesting discussion in our group chat about self-authority and how many times we believe we ‘don’t have a say’ in opening up something within ourselves or others that we know could be fixed, corrected, changed for the betterment of a situation and everyone involved. However, we concluded how relevant it is to instead of wanting to ‘fix things out there’ first, we have to take things ‘back to self’ where one can instead see ‘who am I’ in relation to this point that I’m wanting to change in others and as such, seeing where one’s authority is in the whole case.

What do I mean by this ‘self-authority’ and how I have neglected my own in my life? I’ve found how I’ve conditioned myself several times in various contexts/situations based on an idea, belief or perception of myself as ‘not having the authority’ to change something in me, and it obviously doesn’t come up with such words as in ‘Oh crap, I don’t have authority over that!’ but it comes in the form of ‘I can’t change this, it’s not coming natural to me, based on my past it’s just not something that I can do, it’s who I’ve always been, that would not be me doing that, it’s just not ‘my thing,’ I would not feel entirely ‘me’ doing/saying/being that, I would feel so fake because I’ve never done that/expressed that before’ and one cool question that I’ve come up whenever these things come up which are a form of disempowerment is saying to myself “Well, Who Decides?”

And this ‘who’ is really then a way to bring myself back to who I decide to be, to realize that I am that authority that is able to decide how I can take the first steps to ‘step into the new,’ to start taking those ‘first steps’ in creating something, to decide to practice and express new things, in new ways, to be the one that makes a decision on what I express, what I choose, what I decide to move towards – it’s entirely up to me and the possibilities of doings so – all things considered of course within the context, possibilities, affordability, time, skills and the rest of practical common sensical things to look at when deciding to do something as a practical assessment of ‘I can’ do it and take reality into consideration – but I no longer give that power to my mind’s limitations as in ‘I can’t’ or ‘It’s gonna take so long that I rather just not do it at all’ or ‘It’s not my thing’ or ‘It’s going to be so difficult’ because I am aware how many times I’ve set such seemingly ‘excusable traps’ to myself as limitations which ultimately have led me to ‘long timeloops’ that I’m sorting out currently in my life and have realized are coming from fears of essentially stepping out of my comfort zone and actually ‘do change’ as it was mentioned in a recent recording on Eqafe.

Interestingly enough, this past week I’ve had conversations with a few individuals and it was cool to see that they all have been looking more intently into quitting a certain day to day habit such as weed, alcohol, smoking or even addiction to self-deprecation and ‘past sorrows’ lol. So I found it quite cool that all of them have been looking beyond the ‘habit’ or ‘addiction’ in itself – meaning going beyond the obvious habit created to experiencing some chemical/stimulation change in their bodies – or certain emotional experience – but more looking at and into what of themselves is being suppressed in those habits, where are they keeping themselves in these Timeloops or recycling of experiences day in and day out without really stepping out of the pattern and questioning ‘who am I’ without this habit/addiction/repetitive experience in my day to day? What’s behind my ‘need’ to do it on a daily basis, at the same times or in the same ‘social contexts’ etc.?

It’s quite interesting because quitting an addiction, stopping it or even taking the first step to question it and test out not ‘giving into it’ for one day is already a huge step for many, even more so for those that are not that aware of the various consequences created at a mind, physical and being level within the relationship created to certain substances/chemicals – but more so in discovering ‘what kind of expressions, words to live have I been suppressing or not developing for myself wherein I then believe I ‘need’ this substance in me to focus, to do things, to let go, to relax, to open up conversations with people, to ‘be me’, to enjoy life, to develop my skills in music/art/creativity’ and the rest of expressions that I can totally understand may not be ‘natural’ to most of us, but sure as hell I can say now that it IS entirely possible to be a ‘socially lubricated’, open, focused, relaxed, joyful, creative individual as one can experience oneself with drugs and being entirely sober and still manage to be all of those expressions that we have given our authority to create and develop for ourselves through needing a certain substance in our bodies/minds.

Here I’m mostly describing some of what I’ve discovered myself as well through having been a person that also had fallen into such habits before for various reasons and contexts, creating a dependency to ‘express myself’ for example creatively relying on a particular substance to ‘do that for me’ or ‘be the catalyst.’ And interestingly enough I was also listening to a person’s vlog this morning on menopause and creating an analogy of the symptoms of it being similar to withdrawal symptoms after being a drug addict, where her expression as a reason to take some ‘herbal stuff’ to calm her down was ‘I can’t deal with this’ and her entire expression was that of fighting back tears, being clearly emotional and believing that yes it’s too bad she can’t walk through it without the use of this ‘herb’ or drug.

Now I have no authority there to judge her or consider her as weak for needing that, I have no idea what menopause feels like nor how it is felt if one has been a drug addict, but the point that caught my attention is precisely going into that belief or experience of ‘I can’t deal with this’ where we believe we ‘can’t do it’ or ‘can’t stand’ something, where we in fact believe ourselves to be ‘less than’ such experiences in our minds and bodies – because yep, we have definitely intertwined them to such an extent that any ‘withdrawal’ symptom is not only a psychological but a physical dependency to cut off as well.

And I realized that those are mostly consequential outflows from having created such dependency in the first place – meaning, if one has to quit something, sure there will be withdrawal symptoms at various physical and psychological levels, re-wiring oneself or ‘re-adapting’ to not doing it anymore entails an entire ‘re-alignment’ of one’s day to day experience which has to be in a way ‘re built’ depending on the extent that one has ‘wired’/intertwined one’s life depending on these drugs to do/be/activate certain experiences within us, and that’s where a lot of patience, dedication, perseverance and consistency comes in, as well as being gentle to ourselves because it sure is quite a ‘shock’ to the body that has been conditioned at times for decades to do something as a regular habit. And also, very important, to seek out for support as well!

Having said that, it doesn’t mean it’s going to be an impossible thing where we are kind of already seeing the ‘long road’ and see it as ‘too much to go through’ and immediately create ‘backdoors’ and talk ourselves into this ‘oh no, it’s going to be hard, it’s going to be hell, it will be so difficult! I rather just leave things as they are, I’m ok, it would only compound the problems…’ – right there is ourselves speaking as the worst or lesser version of ourselves that is not realizing the authority we truly have to change things. As the saying goes here ‘Where there’s a will, there’s a way’.

However, I am also aware that it’s entirely up to each one to make this kind of decisions but I personally haven’t talked myself out of my decisions in for example stopping habits I kicked out some 9 and a half years ago when I started this process with Desteni where my starting point was: I want to know who I am without all of these experiences, this ‘neediness’ for something causing me to ‘be’ or ‘express’ in a particular way,’ because I saw it as self-deception, as fooling myself, just like cheating in winning a game type of thing where you know that it’s not you doing the effort or developing the skills as such, but paying off your triumph or bribing someone to change the numbers for you to ‘feel like a winner.’ It’s just a point of self-dishonesty that I decided to stop within me which became a very relevant, sturdy pillar of support for the development of my self-trust – as in realizing ‘I can do this, I can walk through it’ and prove to myself eventually that ‘it wasn’t as hard/bad/tough/difficult as I thought it would be’ and in doing so, kind of debunking this ‘greater than myself’ fear that I had towards leaving these habits, patterns, emotional experiences in my mind, which enabled me to start seeing and realizing what? My self-authority – bingo.

So to me it’s been an interesting week of looking at this word of ‘self-authority’ and questioning where in my life I started first realizing this ‘authority’ that I have within myself, as in living that statement ‘I decide’ and within that decision moving as it, giving it a continuation as in doing something, changing something, stopping participating in something within the understanding of how I want to do this for myself, to get to really know me, to get to really express me instead of having a substance ‘doing the thing for me’ shrinking and wallowing in the back of myself in a position of disempowerment, while allowing a chemical, a substance to ‘kick in’ and be the ‘powerful hero’ one instead of me.

Self authority to me is that strength, that determination that is built not in one single day and within one single decision of ‘changing’ something, but it is something that is daily built and reassured within that continued commitment to myself not only in ‘kicking detrimental habits’ but in the various decisions I make to support myself, to be aware of myself, to ground myself, to work things that come up and ‘knock me off’ from my stability for a moment – I decide who I am in all those bits of moments, and even when there’s ‘nothing happening’ I then focus more into the detail of my physical, what do I have to correct in terms of tightness, tension, tensing up lips, feet, facial muscles, where am I frowning without awareness, where am I again having this undercurrent of ‘rushing’ and there’s in essence always, always  something that I can be focusing on in this same context of establishing the authority of myself, my direction, my decision and action in terms of ‘who I decide to be’ in every moment and in the detail of myself as my physical body.

So, I very much enjoy extending the support that I’ve given to myself to these people in my life that I’ve come to know are walking through this ‘stopping the habit’ phase and enjoy making questions and sharing about my own experience as a way to understand ourselves better as ‘creatures of habit’ and how we can open up things for ourselves that can assist us is sticking to these decisions and testing out ‘who we are’ without these addictions/detrimental habits – or more so discovering ‘what of ourselves’ is hiding behind such habits. It’s a very interesting process and an enjoyable one dare I say because to me every single person that decides to ‘stand up’ in their lives is ‘one plus’ to this equation of self-support that will ripple out not only in our own body, but to the lives of many more that we can continue to inspire to consider doing the same in their lives, as what is ‘best for all.’ That’s why I also decided to write this blog and extend these realizations and support for others that may also be deciding to quit stuff recently.

So If you that’s reading this is considering or coming to the realization that it’s time to ‘kick that old habit’ out of your life, all I can say is Go For It! To me that’s been one of the pieces of ‘freedom’ in my life that I’ve been able to create, to be clean and say ‘I don’t depend on this/that to be me in any given context or activity’ in terms of substances/drugs/alcohol etc. It’s truly liberating in many aspects, and to me that’s one piece added to forming the completion of one’s self-authority as in living the statements of I decide, I do change, I live my decision, I walk through the process it takes with its ups and downs, starting overs and mistakes – I stand right back up if I fall, I stick to it, I trust myself, I persevere, I get it done and I see it through.

Thanks for reading!

 

Take Pills

 

Join us in our process of Self-Expression as LIFE


416. Relationships: Not about the Taste, but the Nutrients

 

There are times when the most obvious still manages to become part of my moment to moment living, and this has been mostly ghosts of the past meaning people, places, past relationships with specific individuals that I also developed highly obsessed type of relationships too. And so what I heard in an interview on Paranoia is about this “positive” type of paranoia wherein I realize that I had missed one single key point: the moment that we allow one memory to occupy our minds and we reactivate the experience of that particular memory in the past, we allow ourselves to re-activate that whole ‘me’ of the past in that single fleeting moment where one gives-up/ gives into any form of energy based on memory. Lol, really it is as if we decide to possess or poison ourselves for a moment just to give ourselves our energy-shot while imagining/seeing pictures in our mind, where we use illusions to kick off an experience within ourselves that we have defined as “pleasant” – either nostalgia, yearning, excitement, excitation, curiosity or merely believing that I miss the person or situation.

 

But then again of course when realizing this – after listening to this interview – it became very obvious how even almost like at a quantum level, even before translating this interview I was having an itching desire to just leave that one for later and go out for the walk. But, I didn’t, I made sure I got it all recorded before leaving and I was glad I did as I was then able to then use my time through my walk on my way back to apply Self-Forgiveness out loud for all the bits and pieces of memories and seemingly ‘insignificant’ moments where I would allow myself to trigger the thought of a ‘ghost of the past’ – meaning a particular memory of a person, situation, event – and then engage within it in a pondering manner, which is mostly what I’ve seen and realized means I hadn’t entirely decided to give ‘good riddance’ to it, to fully and actually let-go.

 

And in this, what came up was the realization that I cannot really ‘miss’ anything or anyone as I am already here, one can only ‘miss’ something as an experience in our minds, as the bond created toward that something or someone.  So, missing implies only ‘craving’ the relationship formed at an energetic level toward another which means: a relationship formed through the mind, which are the only kind of relationships that can be missed, spoiled or desired as they had a starting point of energy and ended up being busted as energy – never real.

 

Within this, I see that the people with whom I have formed relationships based on co-operation, co-working, working through misunderstandings and genuine decision to support each other are rather the strongest and most constructive type of relationships that I would genuinely suggest all of us as humans to develop and invest our time and effort on, it is the kind of relationship that is not dependent on ‘preference’ toward another or a fleeting experience of desire or attraction or based on being ‘similar,’ but rather in the equal recognition of each other as human beings with our weaknesses to strengthen and our strengths to share and learn from each other.

 

I saw that I had associated the word relationship in a rather limited manner wherein I could mostly only see a partnership type of relationship and within that of course, believing that because ‘my point in process are relationships, then I am not doing that well’ and so even creating an experience of ‘leaving that point for later,’ instead of realizing that I would not be able to be doing what I’m doing if I wasn’t able to actually establish relationships with other individuals.

 

So yet again, seeing to what extent I/we have been brainwashed when it comes to words and our narrow view of these relationships wherein even only defining relationships to ‘people’ is still a limited perception, as life is a conglomerate of relationships, and so relationships are the key to being able to function as one organism and be able to live in harmony. For that, each one of us as a thread in the tapestry of our reality has to stand in principle and absolutely clear when it comes to being able to work with one another – what does being clear and standing in principle mean? It implies that there can’t be no past memories haunting one another based on past mistakes, judgments, preferences or merely suggesting ‘incompatibility of characters’ that trigger emotions of contempt and disdain to one another or ‘nice’ and ‘positive’ feelings to one another. In this, any energetic experiences toward another, no matter how subtle, no matter how positive or negative are always coming from the mind, and as such they become like a poison that prevents real supportive and constructive relationships from developing.

 

Why do I bring up the word poison? Because in my own experience, I’ve seen relationships come and go based on the energetic starting point I started and developed them with, wherein even my sole intent and desire to create a bond with a particular person backfired to the point where none of those relationships is standing at the moment, and it’s for the best. It is a tough lesson you see, more so when we have created a culture where all that you learn from TV and movies is to ‘fall in love’ and seek for that ‘spark of love’ or attraction with another, or that nice warm empathy felt to someone that becomes your friend or else – it’s all about ‘feelings’ as fuzzy warm energy sparks that we create in our body, believing that ‘this is normal’ and ‘this is what love is’ or what ‘relationships should FEEL like’ – when in fact Relationships is anything but a Feeling or a fleeting experience in our minds. They are actual processes of walking with another/others throughout a considerable amount of time to get to a particular outcome – to either develop an intimate relationship as partnership or to develop common tasks and projects to take on.

 

Why is there no-energy type of relationships? Because all that we’ve ever known and learned about relationships is to place the FEELING before anything else, and this is rather consequential and on the long run, only smoke that eventually fades out and what is left is mostly the result of our failed relationships: broken marriages/divorces, inability to communicate and eventually war too is a failed ability to cooperate with each other as equals, but instead keeping a particular experience toward the perceived ‘enemy’ that is always self-created: we decide who we hate and who we love, instead of always placing our equality as living beings above all other forms of segregation, which is mind created.  

 

I also spoke self forgiveness for having actually used and abused myself when it comes to using a memory, a ‘ghost’ essentially to trigger an unnatural experience in my ‘physical-moment’ of being just here and suddenly going into this shift as an alternate reality of a sudden yearning, a curiosity, a ‘cherishing the past’ attitude that I took as normal without realizing that in going to the past in those seemingly ‘fleeting moments,’ I have kept reactivating the whole ‘me’ of the past, as the one personality with all its various memories and networks within me linked toward that particular person/situation/event whenever I would allow this ‘ghost’ to emerge within me.

 

I realized that the reason why I wasn’t letting go is because it is those first relationships that you establish that have the most energy, the ones that we get the most obsessed about or give the most attention to, which is why we go endlessly seeking over and over again that ‘first high’ – this is what I suspect heroin addicts seek forevermore after their first shot and they cannot get it ever again,  because it is unlikely that the body can experience such dramatic change of state again. And so addicts try and increase the dose, but it won’t ever be ‘the same.’ It’s the perfect trap when it comes to enslaving ourselves to memories attached with such ‘high experience’ you see: we keep chasing energy, we keep chasing ghosts in our own minds that no one can see but still we allow those ghosts to come up and absolutely define ‘who we are’ in one moment.

So this is a point of awareness to truly be here as breath and not allow the same memory/matrix point to lock-me down into the same thinking patterns, which at times it’s as if they were ‘there’ in the air in a particular place and one would go ‘picking it up’ as one walks through such path – just as one walks the street for example.

 

To Forgive and Let go

 

All that is Here is myself, it’s who we are, and I could only ‘react’ to it if I had formed a special bond/relationship to it through energy. Energy – for all practical purposes – is a mental experience, it implies separation and as such it makes perfect sense to remind me about this aspect of the points of separation that I create through holding on to the specialness in those ghosts from the past, a perceived importance, added care and interest to a part of me that I developed a particular relationship to.

Here another reminder is that no matter how ‘subtle’ this is, whenever I perceive this ‘ghost of the past’ as something that ‘defined me’ and as such is special because ‘it changed my life’ etc. it indicates a speculative relationship toward that something/someone: it’s energy, it’s my mind, it’s memories, it’s invisible, it’s a ghost and I have to stop haunting myself with them.

How I’ve seen these emerge is as if in my mind there were  like these various hooks that containing some of the most ‘attached’ type of experiences and relationships formed in my past, so it is like a broken record seeking to be flipped for another play. It is also quite laughable to what extent we have given up our ability to remain focused here on reality because of having followed these ‘ghosts’ in our minds, giving up our attention to us being here, breathing and suddenly whoop! Going up there in the mind, following these flimsy little things that we already know where it lead us and that tend to constantly emerge in the moments where the actual opportunity to be fully here, physically exist. They come up, ‘innocently’ and the moment we get into the web we get caught – so it’s up to us to decide how far down the rabbit hole we go or if we can absolutely prevent even getting ‘curious’ to fall for the same hole that we already know leads us nowhere in fact.

 

If anything, it is great to observe these memories, to really look at the experience triggered and sometimes it is as if ‘revealing the name of the game’ as the name of the energy would already break part of the spell, because it is in our inability to discern the ‘hold’ that such memory has upon us that breaks the ‘spell’ so to speak.

So instead of going into an experience of being unable to identify the experience we’ve linked to the memory (of a person, of an event) and perceiving that one ‘can’t name it’ but we ‘like it’ so ‘we keep going and go for it’ – it is to realize that I/we have to stop playing naïve when it comes to what we dive into and/or indulge into in our minds. And yes, it’s mostly always about memories, memories, memories – the ‘reminders’ of who we are supposed to be, act like, fear, like, dislike, desire, etc. There is always a way to find out the energy in a memory as in defining what makes us feel good or terribly bad as the most extreme points of fear and desire, like or dislike, these relationships of separation through energy as positive or negative experiences that we create in order to define us, to continue limiting us – but never realizing that by de-fining/delimiting and identifying us with a ‘few aspects’ we’re already building up our personality cage from which we then seek to interact with ‘similar cages’ and avoid ‘different cages.’

This is how we come to create a caged world divided by words, experiences, misunderstandings, offenses and past broken relationships. It’s even funny how we’ve learned to ‘get over’ with some past love or relationship with an individual by then going to the opposite type of relationships such as going from ‘love’ to ‘hate’ and so proceeding to ditch them, taking them in our minds to the opposite side. In this we recreate the exact same relationship to them, it remains in place because all we did was changing the ‘charge’ or the definition ‘tag’ of the relationship build up – in this case moving it from love to hate, but our personalized relationship to that one person/event/thing is still the same: based on energetic experiences that only we can define because: they only exist in our mind.

I still very much ponder how come we haven’t declared mental insanity around the globe so that we can create a genuine ‘state of emergency’– along with our regular duties and responsibilities – make it mandatory for our common wellbeing to work on our mental stability, health and support ourselves to go through it, as that is the key to genuine peace and solidarity on Earth, to learn to ‘love our neighbor as ourselves.’

So the conclusion is that I cannot keep going fueling these mosquitos from the past, these buzzing little things that can become our sole point of attention if we get to be obsessed with ‘finding more’ into them, instead of seeing them for what they are: ghosts, reminiscences of what once was and it has in fact nothing to do with who the person or situation really is or was in fact, as all that we remember is OUR EXPERIENCE about the situation/person, and that’s always self-created, that’s our own ghost-factory creation, and in this we only continue dividing and conquering each other by illusions.

 

So, hereby I commit myself to stop fueling any tiny thought or memory that leads to an experience about the person/event/ghost of the past and realize and so in those moments realize I can instead fully breathe and realize, I am here and I continue walking and enjoying the moment for what it is.

I realize that we only want to ‘make more’ of our moments as an experience in our minds, and it is the simplicity of breathing here what we perceive ‘lacks’ something, like insipid food that lacks salt and the salt being the energy. We don’t need those ‘extra flavors’ as the flavor comes and goes, it’s only perceived for a few moments on our taste buds and then what really matters is the actual nutrients that we are ingesting and how it will support proper development of our physical bodies – that’s the real type of nutrition then we also have to seek in personal relationships too: not going for ‘taste,’ but rather working on the actual nutrients that we all have and can develop further in each other as we work and live together.

 

My declaration of Living Principles:

22.    The realization that for me to be able to change myself in thought, word and deed to the most effective living being that I can be and become – I first have to ‘know thyself’ and so commit myself to investigate, introspect and understand how I became who I am today, to prepare the road before me into self creation of a responsible, aware, self honest and trustworthy person for myself and so for all

 

breathing being

Suggested Supportive Interview:

When Words are the Looking Glass to Ourselves – Reptilians – Part 203

 

The Free Desteni I Process Lite course is a first platform of self-support to learn more about ourselves, our mind and understand how we can practically improve our potentials and skills.


404. Deconstructing Culture as Myself

 

As I continue my self-investigation it seems that realizing the fact that we all have been preprogrammed individuals following a very specific ‘plan’ that involved conditioning ourselves to become a certain role/personality in our minds and never question it,  wasn’t still completely grasped within me when it comes to seeing culture and how it has been specifically designed to support particular agendas that have led to various ‘cultural movements’ that within me I still wanted to believe were attempts of us as human beings trying to ‘break-through’ or ‘break-free’ – lol – but mostly managing to break ourselves further through imprinting certain behaviors, ideas, concepts, morals, ‘world vision’ that became actual distractors in the sense that none of these points would be useful or supportive for a genuine change in this world, but instead it was the patterning and standardization of what we would think, what we would understand as ‘freedom’ and what we would find entertaining or alluring in our lives, which is also containing the ways in which we see/define/categorize and think ourselves and everyone/everything else, which is mind control through the most ‘subtle means’ such as television/media/arts and everything that is usually reached by the average person, even if such person doesn’t go to school for example.

 

All of this was part of the ‘greater plan’ to be perpetually enslaved to our own constant desire to experience, to be ‘hooked on energy’ so to speak which is what we accepted as our every day living, our every day ‘drive’ and motivation to go to work, do the exact same things every day to earn a living and then come home and be able to relax while getting ‘updated’ on ‘what is going on in our minds’ which is what then becomes part of your passive indoctrination into new fascinations, new obsessions, new desires to consume, body types, new personalities, new things to essentially get ourselves occupied with in our minds which became a self-inflicted way to accept and allow ourselves to dive into complacency of how this system operates, since we mostly came to conclude that ‘As long as I can have my free time to do whatever I like doing to relax and entertain myself and those around me are protected ($),  who cares whatever else is going on in the world?’ – we even have gotten to the point of praising our enslavement by idolizing those that we have accepted and allowed as ‘masters’ in our world and gullibly thinking that we can someday reach/rich ‘that top’… without realizing the system is structured to not allow anyone else to get to such positions, but be constantly reminded ‘they can’ if they just hit the jackpot like stars do nowadays with reality shows, singing contests and whatnot. It’s All around us and no matter if kids are homeschooled, kids will still be having a TV, internet, peers that will simply be also the product of all of this so, we have to establish principles in order to direct ourselves within it and so the younger more impressionable minds too.

 

DSC00397

 

In my case I linking what should have been rather obvious to me from the time that I became more ‘acquainted’ with TV at the age of 7, specifically cable TV and American TV Channels. But also from the books that I read throughout my teenage years, I was still holding on to them and the writers as proof of what I believed was an attempt of us to ‘breakthrough’ or ‘step out of the system’ when it comes to human creativity and other creations like music, fine arts, films – all of the ‘marvels’ of the world that I once saw myself being ‘inspired by’ in order to overcome my own inner conflict which was in fact first of all created by everything that I began watching on TV as I had no actual ‘worries’ in my life as such. I can say I am a genuine product of spending childhood watching MTV for example. So, I’ve been finding out how it is that these ‘artists’ were in fact used or let’s place it in a more tangible way: their own creativity was rather used in order to further certain agendas related to ‘pushing the envelope’ when it comes to instilling ‘new’ ideas, personalities, fantasies, personalities, ‘ideologies’ and even addictions within people, all of it paid with what is called fame and fortune wrapped in the package of ‘celebritism’ or artistic personalities or eccentrics that portrayed the apparent ‘perfect ways’ to ‘escape the system’ – to present the illusion of ‘yes, anyone can get to the top!’ or ‘Anyone can beat the system and escape!’  and bam! There I went, right into it as far as I could when I was into aiming at doing/becoming like certain personalities and doing what they did and living their life.

 

Now within this there’s also a point to consider how it is not only some evil cabal’s plan to complete their ‘great work’ and have all these stereotypes, morals, behaviors, ideas being imprinted in everyone’s minds through manufacturing culture and all of us believing that artistic manifestations were evidence of ‘man’s evolution’ – which in essence as such, evolution is just consciousness upgrading itself, which means there’s no real Self-Awareness in it, just new ‘trends’ that could be sold to people in an attempt to fulfill the constant desire to progress, to advance, to ‘become better’ – lol – not realizing we haven’t ‘evolved’ an iota from the moment of our creation, only the scenarios have changed and we have seen our ‘technology’ create the illusion that we have changed, but we haven’t, at all.

 So this is to understand that the history we have been taught in schools of course is taught by the winners, those that have created the wars and have perpetuated the idea of how a god would choose who the monarchs would be, and so forth – all of it which was usually ‘backed’ by the evidence of artistic creations used as another alibi to confirm certain theories of our evolution. But in reality, a lot of it has been transfixed in order to suit certain theories to, once again, advance certain notions of evolution, of real change and human refinement, simply to continue justifying what we have as ‘arts’ today which have mostly become part of the dumbification or downgrading of ourselves as individuals in order to promote carelessness, apathy, destruction, chaos, mental disorders, the destruction of any value or principle but only shock and disturb to such an extent that it becomes a ‘norm’ nowadays in what we call our entertainment, which is really entrainment.

Once we get to know of the actual history – through currently non-institutionalized sources of course – of how our culture has been engineered as a necessary tool of propaganda to back the ‘story’ of ‘how things are/how they have been’ and paving the way to ‘how things will be’ there is no doubt that we are continuing to lock ourselves in these ideals based on what we get/absorb from the media/environment around us, which is nothing else but the same mind patterns made ‘enjoyable’ just like junk food that one can get addicted to: it tastes good, you then crave for it but nevermind really getting to know about the lack of nutritional content.  In essence our culture has become the glorification and legitimization of ‘our human nature’ as ‘who we are as the mind,’ separated from reality into the fictional stories that we could spend our entire lifetime creating of ourselves as personalities, as ‘characters’ in our own ‘movie’ that we actually begun thinking we had to create as ‘our lives’ and ‘our relationships.’ It’s been very interesting to me to see my own brainwashing and how my own relationships, my own thoughts/ideas/fixations were all imprints that I took from music, music videos, books, TV shows and essentially immersing myself in a culture that I wanted to belong to at the time – American Culture – because of loathing ‘my own culture’ which is what I had then perceived as the low-life Mexican Culture and as such never realizing I was actually then going to be my own reference as to ‘who one becomes’ when continually watching American TV, which I did for the most part from age 7 till probably 15-16 or so.

 

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CULTure is the perfect way to entrain ourselves into consciousness, ‘what everyone is thinking about’ and ‘what’s talked about’ which comes in the form of our news, TV shows, movies, music, etc. containing components as behaviors, personalities, thinking patterns, fashion, attitudes, morals, obsessions, addictions, etc. – all of it having ‘profitable’ purposes but goes beyond that and into the necessary role of providing the ‘circus for the masses’ to ensure that this time, the Holy Roman Empire does not fall for not giving enough bread and circus to the people. One only has to have a look around us and see that it’s easier to talk to someone about a TV show than politics or economics; it’s easier to strike a conversation with someone about a movie than it is to discuss our emotionally driven tendencies to buy products as way to compensate for some kind of ‘emotional need.’ Culture has always been the way to perpetuate a mindset, a way to legitimize ‘how life is lived’ and ‘how things are done,’ what is ‘cool’ and what is not, which essentially consolidates our usually used as an excuse to not change ‘human nature’ – culture is its own PR campaign that we are then taught in schools as part of our history and ‘ethics’ so that we are reminded that ‘there’s ALWAYS been someone at the top of the food chain, there’s ALWAYS been slaves that are disempowered, deal with it, try to always aim at the top and enjoy the show while it lasts.’

Currently if one cannot see the actual agendas for further depravity, lack – because they were never ‘lost’ of any living principles and the ‘Do as Thou Wilt’ mentality to give continuation to our ‘age old’ culture, one must be very, very brainwashed – not to worry though, it’s not too late yet. Nowadays sexual depravity is the ‘norm’ when it comes to the idea of ‘sexual liberation’ and female empowerment means stripping down in front of crowds and being praised by millions as some kind of ‘queen.’ Another example is how within our ingrained desire to ‘feel free’ the idea of ‘the rebel’ or the ‘anti-system’ became part of the social engineering process to always contain and control any form of actual break-through within individuals, which is the predictable way of acting if you see that something is ‘not right’ and your are being abused, you then aim and attempt to ‘break free’ from the oppressor by opposing, judging, antagonizing and denying it, revolting against it which are all the ‘anti’ movements that have become part of the systematic and predictable antithesis processes to actually Contain the people within such stance/roles and behaviors for which ‘the system’ as we have all co-created it was always ready to thrown back some ‘solution’/synthesis to further control. It’s just following what Lenin said in the lines of If you want to control the opposition, take the head of it, and you can see that all ‘leaders’ and role models in arts and so-called revolutionary people have been also part of perpetuating the same status quo, even if they were not aware of.

 

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To prove this point in terms of realizing how our culture has not been one that supports life, I bet that you have most likely never seen a movie pointing out how life is not about participating in our own mind as thoughts, emotions or feelings… or becoming self-responsible, or empowering each other to become the actual directors of our lives, of how poverty could be eradicated if we all partake in political solutions – not just one lucky good-doer leader here and there – not at all, instead we create the opposite and as such, it becomes what occupies our mind at a conscious level, it’s what suits our ‘human nature’ which is that of blame, vengeance, victimization…  just look at V for Vendetta that became the brainwashing mechanism for everyone at Occupy Wall street believing they had some kind of ‘power’ to oust ‘the bankers’ while seeking revenge – lol, fascinating how MOVIES are in fact dictating how we even ‘revolt’ nowadays, isn’t it? Not to mention the masks that became part of protests since 2011 and specifically the ‘anonymous movement’ are copyrighted to Time Warner, thank you for your contribution to one of the five top corporations that run the media in this world – wink, wink. How have we accepted and allowed to become SO predictable and SO Brainwashed and still fall for it? Easy, the same culture has become the only ‘soup of thoughts’ we all swim in.

 

 

This is precisely WHY ‘going against the system’ is just becoming the predictable pattern within the foreseeable attempts to ‘break free’ from our minds which is just playing the role of becoming the dark pole to the white counterpart or ‘going in the opposite direction,’ confirming our ‘dialectic’ predictable mentality that was also part of what ‘great philosophers’ left on Earth…  it is really only giving a name to the mechanisms in which we operate in our own minds – no big discovery, only making visible what we already exist as in our polarity mind-constructs of good and bad, right and wrongs, positive and negatives caging ourselves into oblivion within Energy and the illusion of ‘breaking free’ – all of it being the ‘building blocks of the illusion’ that we can call culture formed by the massive distribution and repetition of ideologies, images, sounds = all created in and as the image and likeness of who we are as the mind and its mechanisms, hence the importance of knowing thyself and becoming Aware of what one thinks, what principles one lives by, how we created our personality, what are our goals in life and where did we take those ideals from? Why do we dress a particular way? Why do we like a particular set of movies? Why do we Feel differently toward things, people, places, music …. There are so many theories and attempts to debunk the origin of our culture and all I can remember from it is that as human history it ends up when ‘hitting a wall’ where no man has gone beyond – before 2006 – and attributing everything to god or a creator and as such, for example seeing the origin of art as having some kind of magical-religious purposes…. Oh yes, that means core programming for enslavement within the idea of ‘higher someone’ dictating everything we do and because we could not understand it, we came to draw it or paint it or sculpt it so that it would later on become our way to solidify the same plot of what we have come to accept and allow as ‘how things have always been,’ and even learned how to revere it as well! That is us at the dawn of our species, and that is still us at the time as well. No evolution has taken place whatsoever.

 

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Coming back to my own case here, it’s cool and rather necessary for me to debunk what I see I had wanted to hold on to as some kind of belief in ‘human creativity spark’ or a bit of ‘romanticism’ when It comes to human expression and sure, the works and creations themselves can still be very well done, but it’s definitely not something ‘special’ or as an attempt to ‘break through’ some kind of programming – lol –  it’s rather the opposite. Once one starts seeing and understanding the ‘big picture’ and how these personalities or built-up stars play a role within the whole scheme and get to understand who paid them, for what purpose, within the context of which agenda, any remains of romanticism or ‘out of the box’ hopes upon artists just goes down to the drain as it should, because it was never ‘real’ anyways, it was never intended to honor and support life, so why praising something or someone that I personally only used to confirm my own existence as a mind consciousness system that absorbed all of this knowledge and information to further myself down my own mythological rabbit whole? It’s pointless.

To me this is a bit ‘late’ to realize in my process with such clarity, but better later than ever breaking through yet another ‘layer’ within the experiences, ideals and fascinations held within me as part of ‘my personality’ created in the image and likeness of the illusion; what I mean by ‘illusion’ are my experiences, my own responses toward certain artists, books, films, arts in general which means, how I FEEL and how I would See myself in relation to ‘what is of this world’ and what ‘suit’ I wore most of the time to be in it. I also see that I can apply this same realization to any other point or aspect in reality toward which I had held some ‘special value’ upon and instead see it  within self-awareness for what it physically is,  realizing that there’s no ‘grandeur’ in anything in this reality at the moment that I could genuinely ‘praise,’ because everything that we’ve ever done as humanity and our ‘culture’ specifically has been engineered within the context of our preprogrammed reality, of revering the mind and system that it is in our outside world – but never life which is what I actually ended up doing for myself: I found ‘my place’ in the world in a comfortable cage where – If I had continued down my ‘preprogrammed path’ – I could not at all have affected real change, because arts as I now see, in order to become really ‘famous’ and revered, you cannot genuinely destabilize the status quo, and so all the people I admired and I believed made some advancements really only landed themselves in jails or ended up as drug addicts, alcoholics, committed suicide or fell for the path of fame and glory as it is still apparently ‘too hard to refuse’ when you can sign a pact with the devil to get everything you want and ‘make it’ in this dog-eat-dog world. We have all become preys of our own emotions, feelings, desires and wants, yet we believe that that is the key to a fulfilling life, to ‘get it all’ when it is in fact that way in which we are imprisoning us all at the moment, disregarding the fact that if I take more for me, I am in fact leaving another without any.

This is a lengthy point to me as I chose to and wanted to become part of culture as a creator of it, so I chose to study a career dubbed as ‘creator of culture’ which is arts, visual arts and for the most part I’ve seen how ‘arts’ in general are being used as the circus to entertain, to further decay, to instill new ‘ideologies’ and ideas with which we most likely end up much worse that we already are doing in our overall human decay we’re living in. This too can be changed and I see this IS the point I can certainly do not only for myself, but for anyone else that’s realizing the same propaganda-role that art has taken throughout our known history of it.

 

So, this is not over yet, it’s only just begun. I would actually challenge and/or suggest to you reading this to look at which character either from a film or book, what artist you idolized or ‘wanted to emulate’ for some reason and why, what kind of ideology from a certain movie or series you could ‘identify’ with and decided to make it your own by becoming/acting/speaking/wanting to look like someone you saw on the TV, a film, a book character, an artist, etc. The more and more we start considering the seemingly subtle ways in which our behavior and what we claimed to be ‘our own personality’ has been influenced by the media and entertainment we participate on a constant basis, the more we will be able to realize to what extent we are STILL accepting and allowing the continuation of the problems in this world by realizing that our current culture is not one of self-support and honoring each other as life, as equals – but instead we are using it to perpetuate and upgrade our own alienation from the matters that should have always been part of our culture, which begins with self-awareness of who we are in ourselves as our mind and How we are contributing to the creation or destruction of our reality with the ways we act, speak, think within our lives and toward others.

 

This will continue …

 

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Are you mind controlled? Test yourself here:


379. “This World is the Universe’s Asylum”

 

“Ask yourself this: Does mankind deserve redemption for everything it’s done? Is this a world which deserves to be saved? Everything you see around you, all those wars, all those acts of destruction and brutality were caused by the minds of people. We’ve destroyed this world without even batting an eyelid and you wish for us to be saved? Why?
Though well intentioned, your solutions will fail and never be heard; your voice of reason is barely a whisper in this world. How are you going to convince 7 billion people to be compassionate, loving, kind and respectful to one another and the world? You can’t and you won’t. Sorry. We condemned ourselves to this hell hole existence a long time ago. This world is the universe’s asylum. Have fun in the mad house!! Get the 9-5 job, work until your old, watch TV, eat junk food, obey the law. Trust me, this world ain’t going anywhere. It’s here to stay, sadly. You may as well partake in the madness while you’re here. What else is there to do?”
FocusReborn

 

This is a comment placed as a response to the vlog I Want the World to End and it brings up the same mentality that I would have remained in – or probably dug my own grave with – if I had not stumbled upon Desteni and taking on this Journey to Life, to finally shed the skin of apathy and misanthropy that at times emerges whenever I see or read about things that I haven’t yet fully realized are part of everything that is here, myself, no matter how hideous they may be.

 

Pollution - 2003 - Marlenlife

 

To the person that wrote the comment, thanks for writing it out as it has opened up a window of opportunity to renew my vows to myself and this process and explain the starting point of everything that we do, which  is precisely to get past such enslaved mentality of ‘nothing’s gonna change the world’ and only seek and con-form with bits of highs here and there and sit down and feel miserable about every thing that we’ve been and become, all that we’ve created as a world that we rather feel sad, ashamed of, despise or even ‘accept as is’ instead of doing something about it.  This is the kind of message that can only trap you when one believes oneself to be ‘so small, so little, so insignificant’ to create any form of change in this world, which certainly begins with ourselves, our own life.

 

It’s astounding how we discourage each other from stepping out of the (mind)frame, however I understand the individual’s starting point for sharing this and how the origin of such words are not even questioned by the author, I can read no life in it, it’s only a mind speaking for it’s own survival: the resistance to change, the hopelessness, helplessness, conformity, apathy and judgmental behavior for the sake of seeing everyone else on ‘the same boat,’ seemingly lost.  And this is not to be taken personal, as once again, it’s not the potential of life speaking for the individual, but only the ‘who we are’ as the lesser form of ‘life’ that we have become, the de-manned position.

 

The starting point of walking this process is not within the hopes of ‘changing 7 billion people,’ that would be rather disingenuous and not  considering the reality that we are in wherein yes, it will take a long time to change our current human nature, it will take the most effort from each one of us since it is as if we were all addicts of the worst kind wherein our very own lives and this planet’s stability depends on us getting unhooked from very addictive drugs which creates secondary reactions such as fear of changing, apathy, complacency, hopelessness, helplessness, positivity, negativity that I also once experienced, seeing no way out and then simply deciding to ‘jump in the boat’ of the hopeless ones, because apparently feeling miserable about the world make me at least ‘feel good’ and ‘alive’ – yes, it sounds contradictory if one does not understand how the mind operates. Once you get to understand who we are as the mind and decide to stop feeding the constant desire, want and need to FEEL anything – whether positive or negative – you start realizing how puny this little energy-whoring system that we’ve become really is.

 

Robot man - 2003 - Marlenlife

 

However it does take quite a constant and diligent decision to stop seeking the energy, the experience, the ‘thrill’ and instead breathe and direct oneself to what is physically supportive – and yes, that means that there’s no ‘highs’ or ‘bad’ experiences in doing what’s best for all, in moving oneself to become a living example of a mind-addict reformed human being, and that’s why walking this process is so unpopular in our reality – for now – because it provides no energetic payoff that one can feel ‘good about.’ Yet, all I can say is that consequences in our reality are knocking on everyone’s door and I certainly cannot recommend to anyone anything else but getting hands on keyboard or pen and start writing, start straightening up ourselves, start making sense of our own ‘mindful selves’ wherein the usual points of support sought are street or over-the-counter drugs, ad-vices from other people, escapism through alcohol, sex, developing ‘extreme habits’ only to get away from facing oneself…

 

This is the nature of our current selves drowned in a very limited pit that exists as the mind that we have delegated our every-moment of our lives to. And so, the entire ‘mess’ and ‘Universe’s asylum’ that who we are as this world have become is nothing else but a proof, a written testimony of what the majority of us are thinking and acting upon every single day, making of these thoughts our creed. And then we ponder ‘why are we so fucked up???’ while ignoring that the sheer experience one usually has when asking such question with extreme awe is already a 1+ vote to humanity’s  similar thought-patterns and experience – and once again: an experience ONLY exists in our mind.

 

Look at the trees, look at the animals, look at the air: does it show any emotion or feeling or speak about ‘giving up’ or ‘seeing no way out in this world’? Do birds get depressed and tired when the sun comes up and think of rather staying in a branch wallowing in their misery? Of course not. If anything, every single part of this existence is far more aware than a human being, and by all parts I mean animals, plants, nature, every blade of grass and that includes what we consider ‘inanimate’ too – it’s just common sense that everything that is here is an enclosed reality of which we’ve never been ‘outsiders’ from, which means that everything we see and are here is ourselves, our creation. 

 

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Deciding to jump into the comfort of apathy, disdain, hatred, misanthropy or plain disgust with ourselves as humanity is nothing else but another justification, excuse and distraction to not acknowledge what it is that we are here for: to understand ourselves as creators. Yes, we have even built gods to do the ‘dirty work’ for us and have someone to blame for everything that went wrong,  just because we’ve been so scared to realize and understand that every single atrocity committed in this world is ourselves, and yes, I know, it does get your reactions going on when witnessing some horrible acts that reveal our current human decay, but that’s the whole point of it: it’s about realizing that any atrocity, any thought, word and deed against life is committed by everyone of us each time that we do not act within the consideration of what is best for all, which imply energy-less physical moments of self-direction, self-will, self-responsibility and self-honesty to act in the best interest of all.

 

These are empty words without having context as to how to live them, because they are not part of our inherent programming as to understand ‘How to be self-honest,’ ‘How to learn how to Care for yourself and another,’ ‘how to develop self-integrity,’ ‘how to become self-directive.’ In a world where the word responsibility is immediately hooked on to the usual connotations of fear and resistance, it becomes quite ‘challenge’ to remove the veils and see thing for the potential we all have to change each word into a living expression wherein, in fact,  taking self-responsibility is one of the most empowering things we can do in our reality.

 

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Look at the ‘elites,’ those in ‘power,’ they stand as points of responsibility in our societies and because the rest of us decided to cross our arms, sit and watch TV to be entertained, they automatically got a carte blanche to do whatever they would think about that would provide the best experience, the greatest reward, the most power – isn’t this something that we All participate in as well? So why are we blaming Others for ‘doing bad things to us’ when we think and assess our reality using the exact same mental framework that ‘THEY’ do to commit the ‘BAD’ and ‘EVIL’ deeds in the world – people are nothing else but parts of ourselves we continue to deny as ourselves too, and within this we believe we don’t have any ‘say’ on this world because apparently ‘we haven’t done anything wrong’ but as long as one continues to fear outcomes instead of walking through the solution in the moment itself, we’ll continue to lengthen our process: unless we stand up for ALL life within the understanding that the part that commits all atrocities, all the madness, the neglect, the irresponsibility, the dishonesty, the nastiness is the ‘who we are’ and have become as the Mind – yet, who ‘those’ people are as flesh and bones is no different to anyone of us reading these words and that’s where each one of us has the potential to wake up from zombieland mindcontrol and start realizing how much time and space we’ve wasted in ‘feeling like a waste’ in a world that we’re turning into a wasteland with our own apathy to correct and direct things into its right place, to deliberately push ourselves to become individuals that can be trusted with life.

But again, ‘trusted with life’ seems meaningless and pointless when we haven’t even been ‘alive’ for real, we’ve only existed as automated patterns that we have called our life and within such diminished and narrow-view we then create an equally narrow view of our ‘doomed lives’ wherein we dare to write comments like the guy that wrote that – once again – without even understanding or pondering about the origin of such words and how within each one of us ‘living’ such words, we become the very problem subsumed in the ‘greater problem’ that we’ve made of our reality, due to this accepted and allowed apathetic and dreadful behavior of ‘nothing’s going to change anyways.’

 

Well, I’ve been there done that, and the reason why I made that video is precisely to address and reach out to anyone that feels the exact same way, which is quite common since everything we see around us is mostly the ultimate decay and bottom line that we’re reaching as humanity. There’s no denial of that, however this is about realizing that who we are and have become is nothing else but the worst of the worst, the lowest point that we can reach as a collective, to finally understand how we feel miserable and so create this world as misery because of such thoughts existing within ourselves in the first place. And so, the rest goes on with each word we direct to continue drowning ourselves in our self-created torment in our minds, without realizing that in doing so, we’re doing nothing else but creating excuses and justifications as to why we’re not standing up and taking responsibility for the mess that we’ve collectively created.

 

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Have we been ‘bad’ as human beings? One only has to see the results of our thoughts, words and deeds and have the results speak for themselves. If we continue to bash us,judge us, blame each other and ultimately lose any sense of respect for oneself and another, we will continue living in our current world that we are all so fed up of, yet we fail to see that the answer to stop recreating the ‘shithole’ resides in our very own hands, in our words, in our actions, in the decision to live and do what gives zero energetic high, but endless self-stability and clarity that emerges with the certainty of being and doing what is right, what is best for all.

 

Fortunately, I’m walking this process to never again allow myself to be trapped in the swamps of the moody mind patterns of ‘this world is going to hell, so why bother doing anything about it?’ and actually deliberately direct myself to investigate, create and support solutions to this world, which at this stage, must come from the realization that We CAN do this if we all give ourselves that initial chance to stop the addiction to feeling miserable, sad, depressed, hopeless, helpless and instead realize that this world is about breathing and doing, not about feeling and thinking, that’s been our whole problem, so let’s stop rambling, let’s rather become part of a 1+ human physical body that decides to live, breathe and create in consideration of what’s best for all, that’s deal reached.

 

We’re not here to save others, we’re here to stand up, face and correct ourselves, and within understanding who this self is, you then won’t require to get entangled with the idea of ‘changing 7 billion people.’ So I suggest: less thinking,  more of self-awareness, developing self-integrity required to do this as a principled living, not as a result-driven thing – this is about making a decision of who one is every single moment, where I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to exist within a limited framework of my mind wherein I have seen the world from the ‘gloomy-scope,’ meaning seeing no way out, without realizing I was only seeing through this thought/emotion filter of mind which I became used to because it was much easier to ‘feel bad’ than stopping and actually doing what is supportive for oneself: to stop thinking, and feeling miserable and instead focus on the potential that exists within each one of us to ‘save oneself’ from becoming another mental patient in the asylum that each one of us reside in when existing only in the mind.

 

So, this world isn’t the asylum: our minds are our personalized one, and as long as we remain complacent to what we think, believe, feel, experience only in our imaginary worlds: the world will still look like a perverted-story of what could have been a genuine paradise. Is it too late? is there salvation? is there ‘light’ at the end of the tunnel? I don’t know, nor do I Have to KNOW as that would only once again be a creation of the asylum mentality that keeps us bound to fear, limitation and neglect most of the times. So, the solution is to act in every moment that we are here and can physically act in the best interest of ourselves and each other, which begins the moment we decide to stop participating in the collective delirium of giving up on ourselves and the world, without understanding first how it only is another trick of our minds that we can also stop and correct to not be shaken again by words, pictures, thoughts, imaginations that maintain us in our schizophrenic reality, separated from what is real here.

 

My voice and that of others walking with within this journey might seem a ‘whisper in the 7 billions in this world,’ but again, trying and change others is not our goal either, it would be cool but we understand how reality and self-change works,  so we can be the example of what it is to be able to shed the skin of limited prepackaged personalities and genuinely learn how to create ourselves, it’s the best process one can ever undertake in this world, yet be warned: there is no ‘high’ in it and that’s the challenge: this process won’t make you feel greater, stronger, smarter or being just the god in your world, and that’s the whole point: to learn how to live as physical beings instead of existing as walking mind delusions on two feet that do not even understand why we follow every single thought that comes in our mind and immediately thinking ‘its me thinking’ ‘it’s me talking’ ‘it’s me feeling…..

 

Mr. Madhouse porter – what else is there to do in this world, in our lives but to get ourselves out of the personalized asylum? Only in insanity would anyone want to remain in a miserable and limited position, so let’s start with developing a bit of care to see what it is that we would really want to live like in this world and start doing something about it.  We all are the madhouse’s porter until we dare to see that the insanity only exists in the mind, not the physical.

 

It wasn't Eve - 07

 

To broaden one’s spectrum of reality:


372. Desteni Insider: Mind Control and Brainwashing

“The world is in reverse” is the premise to consider whenever the Desteni Material is approached and that is because you are going to face your own brainwashing to the utmost degree, up to the point wherein the ‘you’ that has been occupying the body that you are living in will be stripped down to the core to see what is of real substance and what has been only the byproduct of the endless indoctrination and conditioning within a world-system wherein fear conducts the way toward happiness, light, love, success and an elusive freedom. Reading the first words again “The world is in reverse” means that we haven’t even yet pondered why we seek all these ‘great and good things’ without realizing that such desired experiences indicate that we are by default existing in the exact opposite: sadness/depression, dullness, hate, failure and enslavement. The Orwellian state of the world is the premise one could use from popular culture to understand that such perversion of words is not limited to governments or any other corporate institution that seeks to make the most profit by selling the abuse of life with smiles and frequent client rewards, it has become the foundation of our very own vocabulary as the words that we claim we “live” without genuinely understanding what such verb in fact implies within a reality that is intricately designed to abuse and harm all life in order to continue supporting the schizophrenic concept of ‘living’ that we are enduring at the moment. Yes, it’s being endured without pondering why is life such a struggle, why do we have to strive to make a living, and the point that I will focus on within this blog is the righteous act of wanting to revolt and blame the system for how things have come to be due to our so-called education process where we learn the best ways to dissociate ourselves from the realization of who we are as part of a collective organism that will create reality according to the nature of the thoughts we have in mind. It’s clear that such separation has turned to be the mirror reality we try to avoid and recognize as our own reflection.

 

Continuing from:

What you are in your mind won't pravail - wake up

What you are in your mind won’t prevail, wake up! (2009)

 

It is interesting that the Desteni Material and all of us involved in applying the principles at Desteni have been called out for being a ‘thought reform group’ or ‘mind control cult’ and any other form of slander which, according to the necessary premise on how ‘the world is in reverse,’ it is actually a good thing since that means that we are genuinely breaking the status quo of what has been accepted as ‘healthy thinking and behavior’ because we certainly such thinking processes have led us ( k )nowhere but evolving the ways with which to abuse life and each other in the name of greed. What I have done throughout my participation within the Desteni group is to learn how to investigate all things and keep what’s best, which is placing everything we’ve ever known under the magnifying glass to see whether the education at home, in schools, in society, in our relationships, in the words that we speak genuinely stand as the tools words are to create a world that is best for all.

We shouldn’t even require to confirm that none of the ways in which we have ever lived have been supportive for all of us as human beings, otherwise the world would have already been a place that is genuinely best for all and our reality as our creation is an irrevocable proof of that. Some of the misinformation propagated by the Desteni antagonists claim that we ‘segregate’ ourselves from humanity, from our families and friends, from our reality by being submerged in an individual process where we forgive ourselves for accepting all the lies and deception that we were taught as ‘how things are’ and the relationships based on self interest that lead us to become the predictable patterns that keep the world as is– what a disgraceful behavior, isn’t it? To self forgive every single aspect of our separation from our living realization of how everything we have ever been has been a lie since it has never given birth to life.

 

 

If anything it should already be a matter of concern that we all know that the education system is not working, that parents don’t even know how to educate their children, that our authorities stand as examples of how to get to be the most ‘powerful and successful’ individuals by being the most corrupted version of ourselves as personality profiles that are accepted, allowed and endorsed in a world-system that is founded upon abuse – yet! If one begins to understand principles that consider Life in Equality, genuine Self-Respect, Honor, Integrity and the consideration of Life as the one and only real value that exists, one is called out for being ‘brainwashed’ or ‘mind controlled’ or attempting to introduce ‘communism’ which is just another word like the bell to Pavlov’s dogs to ‘instantly’ react to it and expecting security and a sense of comfort as the reward by defending the right to be ‘free to be a capitalist,’  without even understanding what the words they are reacting to in fact mean.

 

The main problem we have realized is to what extent words as equality, collectivism, dignity, respect, integrity and so on are as vacuous as can be, simply because there have been no living examples in humanity that stand as such  living words – Jesus was one of the few and then was turned into a religious effigy to obfuscate the genuine fact that he was a man that lived the physical common sense meaning of such words. As humanity we have become the example of what it is to intellectualize and even deify living examples of what it is to live in self-respect, to live self-forgiveness and the willingness to be in the service of life itself which doesn’t only entail human to human interaction, but toward every single particle of what is here as part of ourselves, as the life we have hijacked in the name of power and control and within doing so, mining our own home that we’ve been trashing for far too long now.

 

(2011)

 

When facing one’s own brainwashing one can distinctly realize that every single word we’ve been taught and consequently “lived” has been part of the necessary deceptive mechanisms to keep this flawed, corrupted and vile condition on Earth, a collective acceptance and allowance of distrust, lies, abuse and adopting any form of contract to settle ownerships upon reality for the sake of buying and selling, no matter how much harm such processes inflict upon life as long as one’s own survival is secured.

 

Brainwashing and Mind Control are terminals of the same function within which we have all accepted and allowed ourselves to live in this world basing ‘who we are’ on ideas, beliefs, perceptions, feelings, emotions, imaginations, future projections and an innumerable amount of memories that we go collecting and layering as ‘who we are’ throughout our lives with which we form our identity, the ‘self’ that we Think ourselves to be – is it, really?

 

This is the main point one face within and throughout the Desteni I Process, which is the necessary process to walk through when one realizes that all of this understanding needs to be applied at an individual level to see where we stand within it and how to practically lay out the solutions that we ourselves can write and cross reference with other people that are doing this same process with themselves, so that the development of Common Sense as the living application of acting, thinking and doing what is best for all is established as the foundation of the living self that we commit ourselves to be and become once that we realize that yes, we cannot trust the foundation of who we are as the ego that was bred to re-enact the same patterns of self-abuse, we must change it and this won’t come with a simple realization or a few positive thinking statements – not at all, because everything that we have become is in essence the accumulated history of humanity turned into the most convoluted forms to ensure survivalism, self interest and enhancing individual traits that have created the current alarming state of the world as is right now which is on the verge of self-destruction by our own thoughts and hands.

There is nothing more beneficial that can exist nowadays but to walk this process that consists of a fundamental self-investigation on and about everything that exists within and as all levels of our mind and reality to see who we really are within it all and how we can instead direct ourselves to integrate living patterns and habits that can be beneficial for ourselves and everyone equally; this is what I have realized is the only way to generate a living society in conjunction with the understanding and integration of the physical laws into the new equation necessary in this reality to  actually create a world that is best for all. Where is the point of abuse or ‘brainwashing’/ ‘mind control’ within this all? I would like to ask someone to explain to me because I see nothing else but the common sensical and honorable directions that if embraced by each individual on this world, we would have a New Earth without a problem – and this is where Self Responsibility comes in.

 DSC00343

(2003)

Throughout these 5 years walking with the Desteni group and practically applying/living the living principles promoted such as Self Honesty, Self Forgiveness and the consideration at all times of that which is Best for All to implement within and without of myself, I have been able to break-through the main patterns in which I had kept myself complacent to the system, including the personality-traits in relation to ‘wanting to change the world’ without first understanding that such change must be first self-directed at an individual level. To me it was common to spot the ‘flaws’ within the world system or people’s behavior, but I always used to take the righteous stand of ‘I am right and you are all dead wrong’ – I had to go through a personal scrutiny to realize that I also had been brainwashed and had accepted such brainwashed stance as my own mind control of ‘who I am’ and ‘what I must be.’ Only throughout time I have been able to look back and see how within the particular path I had chosen in terms of my career on visual arts, my particular behavior and stance toward humanity – which was mostly that of superiority toward the ‘brainwashed’ and ‘sheeple’ in humanity – I was on my way to become the usual dissident within the world system, the kind of person that would be protesting on and on about how wrong things are while diving myself into the usual suffering-despair of how ‘No one is going to change, so let’s just live our lives the way that we want to, because we can’t change anything anyways’ and ultimately losing any ability to discern the potential of the capabilities I had but begun tampering with dreams of escapism, evasion of reality and enhancement of personality traits veering toward more ‘spiritual solutions’ rather than considering the physicality of the problem I was witnessing in this world, my world.

 

This particular personal stance of opposition, dissidence and antagonism went on to extremes wherein I was aiming at having nothing to do with the system, only focusing on pursuing my personal interests and becoming an individual that is well known for producing ‘nice pictures’ and get great money out of that – that’s all that I had reduced myself to in my belief that ‘we are doomed, there’s no way out of this system’ and within that using my own self-talk to justify such stance and position –hence the main topic of my art being mostly that of self destruction and emotional states that I thought were ‘the real me’ and it was, until I literally took off the blindfold when I got to Desteni.

 

DSC01838

(2007)

 

Amidst a general sense of despair, hopelessness and apathy toward politics or anything having to do with the structure of the system, I moved myself out of any attempt to ‘make it’ in the system within the false belief that I was going to be able to do things ‘my way’ and never again have anything to do with that which I came to despise: the world system, humanity, money, politics and social sciences, economics… It was truly a tantrum the one I was living in right before getting to Desteni, yet it seemed very normal to others in my reality within the acceptance and allowance of my self-proclaimed belief that I was ‘beyond’ that, and that my inner-truth was to express through something more ‘meaningful’ like art where I could be ‘in touch with my emotions.’ Yes, believe it or not, that was me and it can be read in a very palpable way in the very first years of my process wherein a single moment with myself alone still felt filled with  a mixture of anxiety, depression, sadness, despair, helplessness and hopelessness turned into a victimized state of how ‘the world is a shitty place and there’s nothing I can do about it.’

 

It has only been in the past 3 years that everything started becoming more clear in relation to how our particular personalities are the perfect locks wherein we get so entrenched in our beliefs and ideals that we neglect almost everything that does not ‘fit’ with our self-religion, where we can guarantee the maximum ability to ‘enjoy life’ and keep augmenting our egos to ensure a safe spot in the concrete jungle where survival of the fittest means having a successful living – well, in my case it meant: do whatever you can to not be in the system, forget about everything that is evil in the world and rather promote a form of benevolence that can make people feel better, at least for a moment. This also implies doing things that according to my point of view then meant ‘challenging the system’ like smoking weed and making statements wherein I considered that I was ‘challenging the powers/the system’ and inciting people to ‘explore the spiritual realm’ in a desperate move to simply ignore reality and seek for some ‘greater meaning out there.’ Little did I realize then that what I was in fact doing was giving up on myself, seeking for something ‘greater’ to just do the work for us and not have to take responsibility for the hideous reality that I could ‘not bear to live in any longer,’ without even knowing what the meaning of ‘living’ in fact is.

DSC01604

(2007)

The easiest way to brainwash people in a similar personality design to mine is to let them believe that they are in fact ‘doing something’ by ranting and raving about ‘the system,’ by calling out the thieves, by protesting, by yelling, screaming and pouting in front of banks/corporations and governmental offices, by creating riots that could ‘disturb’ any form of control that only evolves and escalates due to the ability of the human being to be led by emotional states that are becoming more and more unpredictable, of course leading to more destruction than any form of practical solution. We can see on our daily news how unreliable and unstable the human mind is no matter what position/character in society one plays in – you can be a priest, a world leader, a loving mother or a proficient athlete and kill their partner, children or commit any other form of atrocity when being taken over by their emotions and feelings – all  kinds of atrocities are justified by each one’s acceptances and allowances at a mind level, the mind that we have taken as the immovable premise of ‘our nature’ throughout human history. It is only now that I am able to realize to what extent the profiles of a dissident, a ‘free thinker’ and a ‘willful ignorant’ are just same brainwashed characters in which people are kept well-controlled by the power of their own rage against the machine, holding a similar faith to the most assiduous religious person that somehow we will ‘overcome the evil in this world,’  holding on to the hope that shouting and pouting will ‘bring the powers down’ and create some form of solution – even the so-called ‘alternative media’ are only new mechanisms that aid this control through utilizing ‘new’ ways to approach young people, calling out to revolt, to be angry, to go out to the streets, to ‘challenge the system’ by promoting the legalization of drugs and internet privacy within the belief that such propositions are the only bastions left to ‘regain the power’ and that’s precisely the problem that has happened throughout time: revolutions were never meant to establish living principles in this world, but only a call out to take over the power and turn the tables, keeping the world in exactly the same place – same inequality with new righteous hands in office. The age old saying of divide and conquer has not been fully realized, yet.

 

I have realized time and time again that there is nothing more important right now as an individual in this world other than focusing on actually taking responsibility for ourselves, however such words cause allergy to anyone that gets a kick out of ‘confronting’ the system in all of the ways explained throughout this blog. I can attest how it is only when realizing all my personality traits to evade reality and use this willful ignorance in an eloquent manner led me to mislead myself, my own choices in life, the people I had established relationships with and the evasion of reality that I defended and guarded as having a right to ‘do whatever I want in my life because I was hurting no one’ – this is the mind of the willful ignorant that is looking at the problems, that pretends to understand but when it comes to living a solution that can be of benefit to ourselves, to actually understand the responsibility we have in our hands to stand as an example of ‘the change we want to see in this world,’ all kinds of excuses and backdoors are open to just have a righteous statement to not change, to not challenge that which we have cultivated for so long which is our own ego, our own brainwashing and mind control. This is what I have come to irrevocably realize day by day whenever we approach solutions to the world system which we have through developing various means like the proposal of the Equal Money System which was an entire process that I will also walk and an essential aspect I decided to stand for and as by myself to precisely shed the anti-system skin I was busy turning into a hard veneer to justify my antagonism and antipathy toward ‘the system’ and humanity itself, which I later on understood was only a constant fight toward myself. This is one of the multiple realizations of the simple words you might hear many, many times throughout the Desteni Material: Oneness and Equality, where the Oneness points out the interdependence that we exist as toward each other as the coexistence in this same world and the Equality that is existent at the substance and physical level, yet perfectly concealed with all forms of separation that we have CULTivated in our minds in the form of egos, personalities, cultures, religions, political parties, the very words we use to justify any form of separation and abuse.

Sórdido

(2012)

 

One of the most prominent points I decided to take on within this process was to develop common sense to stand as a voice that proposes solutions, that investigates other solutions and point out why they are not genuine solutions within the ability to spot a point of deception that would in turn only re-create the same patterns of the past instead of genuinely creating a present with a solid realization of the solutions to implement in this world. So I’ve walked from the anti-system character to an individual that first walks this personal process of de-brainwashing through the dissident, the rebel, the antagonist to the system and instead walk a process of self responsibility to understand the problem, to see my direct participation within it and direct the problem toward directive solutions that we can all embody in the form of living principles. This is where I am now and it is certainly something never ever in my ‘wildest dreams’ did I envision myself doing, which is proposing solutions for this world system as it currently exists, placing political statements on a written and spoken manner suggesting ways to learn how to coexist as humanity since I had already agreed to ‘give up on humanity,’ which was really only ‘giving up on myself.’

This process is not yet done, every day, every minutest form of resistance, any movement toward the old patterns of sadness, despair and a giving up can emerge and that is where every moment I decide who and what I accept and allow myself to be. From this perspective the platform that we are developing as a group as Desteni is actually the perfect foundation to establish a solution at a global scale wherein the brainwashing, the problems in this world are understood and directed from within to establish clear directives without, as we learn how to understand the cause of the problem – ourselves, our own mind – and as such learn how to stand one and equal as the system to establish clear solutions without as the world system. This is the one process, the one ‘thing’ I have been the most consistent of within my life that was meant to veer from fad to fad seeking for more elaborate ways to justify my personal inaction to establish solutions – this time I have developed sufficient self-trust to place myself in a position where I can support myself and others to realize the points I’ve explained throughout this Witness blog as I can stand by the words explained here, having stopped participation in primary forms of personal reality evasions like alcohol or any form of drugs to stand sound and clear on a daily basis witnessing myself and this reality as one massive creation to turn into a genuine work of art, and that begins within myself, ourselves.

 

More to come…

 

Thanks for reading and walking with.

 

CaminandoelTripleProceso

Walking the Triple Process (2010)

 
The Revolutionary Character: From Activist, Anti-Politics and Anti System to Self Responsibility
The Elitist Character – Seeking Success and then Antagonizing the System

 

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Blogs and Vlogs on Brainwashing and Mind Control:

355. Activism and Mind Control |
2011 Activism Is Futile
2011 The Zeitgeist Movement: Resistance is Futile
98. Words as Mind Control |
183. Like and Dislike = Mind Control
2008- 21 days of no weed!
Communism stigmatized Equality
217. You Fear Communism? Why would That Be? |
Mind Control VictimsRead all about it! |
Occupy LOVE: New Activist Brainwashing
Occupy Wall Street’s Solution: Equal Money for ALL –
2011 Capitalism is Brainwash: Are YOU Brainwashed?
Earth Day? Please… Common Sense Required
You are what you Can Afford
2012 Money is MIND Control
2012 Gun Culture in America
2012 I Just Want to BE HAPPY – Equal Money? WHY Should I Care?
Sex, Drugs and…College? Hookup Culture
2010 I Use Alcohol on a Regular Basis

263. The Remedy to Stop Addictions

220. Drug Culture: Mad Society as a Lifestyle

How to Develop Common Sense? Desteni Process Support

 

 

And don’t forget to watch The Century of the Self 


276. Why Do We LOVE FREE Stuff?

Both words Love and Free entail the utmost fallacy and life-abuse, yes, keep reading and you’ll understand why.

 

“Social change organization have been marginalized by the idea that support must be FREE as they give support FREE–but in fact it is subsidized by corporations to be able to provide FREE stuff –This addiction to FREE STUFF is ensuring that the 99% cannot stand up and fund change –Every one is trapped in self interest where FREE STUFF determine decisions — Some common sense that a group must be funded should be realized if change is ever to become a global solution –as long as value is equal to FREE STUFF, the brainwashing trap all in the prison of Money Bottom of Form” – Bernard Poolman

 

This is an Eye-Opening statement that we usually obviously have mostly ignored wherein we have become so used to falling for all the ‘free stuff’ and believe that there are actual ‘free’ things in life. We obviously ignore that there is no-thing in this world that can be carried out without having a point of consumption/extraction/ work/ actions/ time that leads to a certain consequence. This is how whenever people say ‘Hey, watch Zeitgeist!’ and point out their solution being ‘burning all the money/ eradicating the money system’ is a clear indication that brainwashing has been quite deep to understand the implications of what it means to pay for something as a process of acknowledging/ understanding of the resources, processes and labor that took place to create such ‘thing’ that then becomes ‘free’. Sure, the Earth don’t charge us Money for what is grown here, however the ecosystems run through natural processes wherein certainly a lot of life and death processes take place, which obviously imply consumption, relationships, deterioration of the environment which is now carrying all the effects of all these activities lived-out by the inhabitants – the effects of this is demonstrating what happens when we  break the natural cycles of this physical reality in order to establish quantum time mind-desires on a space-time reality where things take Time and actual Work to develop. This is the consequence of implementing our mind-reality upon physical reality: absolute destruction and a constant unstopping depletion of life on Earth, within this, removing Money from the equation can only lead to further unawareness of the actual forces that have made of our current system seemingly sustainable, which is human labor along with the resources that are certainly ‘not for free’ as we’ve explained just now.

 

The way we have been educated is to believe in ‘Freedom’ and as such this libertinage leads to the idea/belief of ‘Free Stuff’ that is a perfect and suitable concept for a capitalist system that promised freedom through consumption – you can watch the Century of Self for self-education purposes and understand the role of Public Relations as the actual cogwheels that use the mind-ingrained patterns to create a sense of ‘independence’ and ‘empowerment’ through buying/ consuming from where this whole idea of Freedom comes from in order to in fact Sell More/ Consume more – did it work? Just look around yourself and this entire world, of course it did which is only possible due to us having been ignorant of the actual forces at work within/as our own mind.

 

If wee look at the tactics to create junkies/ drug addicts, the dealer first gives a ‘free sample’ to the person as a bait in order to expand the clientele, since there is quite a high percentage of certainty that the person will come back for more, this time obviously there won’t be any ‘free stuff’ to take. I place this example to make more obvious the implications of how we believe that receiving free stuff is ‘cool’ without measuring the actual agenda behind such belief and ignoring the fact that nothing is ever really benevolent and ‘free’ and as such, it should never be valued as something ‘truly positive’ in our consumerist society since no-product/ no-thing that is given ‘for free’ is devoid of being an actual product of physical and logistic processes that involve a production process in order to get to be something that can be ‘given for free.’ This should already make it clear that ‘free stuff’ is a delusion.

 

When we look at sales and how we believe that things are in fact ‘cheaper’ or ‘on sale,’  we in fact ignore that the retail prices of things are usually hundreds of times more than the actual cost of production – which is usually done and paid as ‘slave labor/ cheap pay’ and as such, the owner deciding to earn a ‘little less’ to sell more through placing things “on sale” is just another tactic to in fact get rid of all the merchandise to get all the new stuff in store and continue selling at ‘normal prices’ just because it is ‘new stuff’ and ‘no longer on sale’ – Great Lies. Again: there is no ‘real benevolence’ or positivity in ‘free stuff’ if you actually look at what makes it possible for you to even become aware of such ‘free stuff.’

 

Now, in terms of us at Desteni being a a group that was funded by people that understand the implications of being Equal in all ways within this world and process toward change that implies being Equal to the System that we all live in, it is obvious that we are not exempt of using money to survive and continue expanding just like any other person/business that requires money to live. We understand how the system works and this is why we are providing Education such as the Desteni I Process and educational material at Eqafe in order to continue expanding the already 6 years of providing unconditional support to any being within the internet at the Desteni Forum, through all our blogs/vlogs in our Journey To Life and the free courses like the Desteni Lite Process. All of these process imply the dedication of a full time job- certainly implying More time than your regular 9-5 job, a lot of preparation and financial stability in order to be well fed, well educated and having the available time to support more beings, because we understand that the Key to Self Change is through Education, and that’s what we currently provide as well as the solution for a global change that we are currently busy implementing as the Equal Money Capitalism proposal. All of this implies having just what any other human being on this current world system has in order to Live Well: the necessary income to have the available time to provide such services is not given just by ‘spreading self support’ and just consuming air to breathe – that’s obviously Not how it works.

 

If we look at a ‘spiritual teacher’ and an example is here,you’ll hear how it’s fairly easy to link a positive message to self-promotion for meditation and all other forms of psychic abilities, intuition and ‘connecting with your angels,’ which we all know is all bullshit and using blatant tactics to sell some made-up services that people pay for within a self-enlightened interest mode. This seen as ‘okay’ because ‘it’s stuff that you want to hear’ and as such is considered positive, the same way we believe candies are positive and fun and believe this is so until kids turn hyperactive and show early cavities in their teeth, along with elevated levels of sugar – is that real fun and treats for our children?

I mean, if we wanted to make easy money by telling lies and speaking what people Like and Want to hear, we could be making great money – but, since we are speaking the reality of this world and providing tools for self support that imply no miracles and magical acts, people then are turned off because we all want this quick fix, easy-doings type of solutions wherein all that is realized is how we have become so used to our drive-through lifestyle wherein we literally just want to drive-through, ask for our order, get what we want in a few minutes and pay a few bucks for a process that does not involve only the ‘final product’ that you consume, but all the forces at work in order to make it possible for it to exist and as all ‘fast food’ and McDonald’s solutions, this implies animal abuse, labor abuse, exploitation, unhealthy foods that cause illnesses and diseases as well as certain sugar addictions that are not that ‘hard to quit’ once people believe it’s better to ‘buy McDonald’s than cooking fresh food at home.’ This here is the definition of  self-accepted slavery, isn’t it? This only an example that can be extended to virtually any other job in the world that we all depend on.

 

So, we want to create change but we want to give no money to fund it? How does that work? It’s plain to see that virtually everything we benefit from implies a process where money is involved, everything we wear, eat, use on a daily basis is money, the houses, the cars, the so called ‘free areas’ implied money to pay for the labor to build them, education, even growing food is currently not a ‘free act’ either since you have to Buy the seeds and the necessary nutriments to fertilize the Earth, pay for the water to water your crops, etc. We haven’t educated ourselves to understand the processes and actual work-force and resources-used to generate a sustainable system. Yet, we only learn to complain whenever something goes up in prices and are always waiting for ‘luvin’ the free stuff, the sales, the bargains and make ‘great deals’ with that. Right.

 

I am realizing to what extent I had been brainwashed with regards to money, how within certain contexts we make it ‘okay’ to pay for things and for others we believe that we should ‘have it for free,’ because we tend to look at the ‘final product’ and disregard all the amount of mouths fed, all the resources used, the time and education that a person requires in order to create a certain piece of product/ service that is provided. What’s more fascinating is how we even believe that organizations that are determined to Change the system should charge No money at all –how is such thing possible considering that money is the one thing that has enabled us to be in the current position of being educated beings around the world that are committed to fund for a change in this reality – otherwise we would be as voice-less as the 2+ billions of people that we are in fact standing up for, to create and establish a world system that In fact creates a correction from the very root of the flawed structure that we have all accepted ‘as is’ to finally benefit Them as well, the voiceless, the uneducated.

 

What’s more interesting and absolutely fascinating is that all the Education and material at Desteni and Eqafe explain precisely the keys that enable you to understand how change must take place, why we have to be In the system to create a change, where is the ‘problem’ stemming from and how to walk the correction beginning at an individual level. There is No other group in the world that provides the explanations from the very beginning of human civilization and even before time was created in order to understand how and why we are here in this current ‘mess’ we’ve all learned to complain about but never realize our self responsibility toward it,  how and why we have gotten ourselves to this current process of crisis and how Change must be funded with the very same money that we have used to abuse and enfilade beings to win the ‘war of life’ and abuse everyone else on the way.

 

So, the same way we have spoken of freedom being a fallacy and a concept word that sounds as good as ‘love,’ we expose the same with regards to ‘Free Stuff’ that constitute a fallacy in fact since there will always be mouths to feed, resources to consume and work-force-time directed to create such ‘free stuff.’ We can instead ask ourselves what type of enslavement are we accepting and allowing when expecting things to ‘be free’ instead of actually working to implement a system wherein actual freedom will be the ultimate law of equilibrium: equal rights = equal responsibilities and as such one can see that there are always actions and reactions, there is a force and consequence, there is an intention that creates an effect, there is an ability and a duty in equal-manner. That’s the basic giving and receiving consideration that must be understood in our society, to finally stop being brainwashed to think ‘there are free things’ and this ties in with the saying we have at Desteni ‘None is Free until All is Free’ and this is actually implying being free from the Money-Consciousness that we have all participating in wherein we have forgotten who we are as one and equal and the giving and receiving in equality this implies – instead, we have reduced everything to numeric values that we then believe are ‘more’ or ‘less’ than, which is precisely the system that we must transcend through understanding how we created money, why and how we have to use money in order to correct the deliberately abusive relationships we’ve funded with it. Just like anything else: if money became the problem = money becomes the solution.

Real Freedom can only exist when understanding how reality works and as such become an equal force to support to change how the current system that enable abuse operates, because this is our creation: we face it as the gods we have believed ourselves to be.

This is fairly simple: you contribute with paying for your self support and as such you are contributing to continue growing and expanding such support for others, this is the only way that we can ensure that people Hear the Solutions to Equalize Life for All living beings, wherein the same money that we have enslaved ourselves-to becomes our own actual key to freedom, a real one at last and only then can we dare to speak about real love and care for all as Equals.

 

For further information, visit:

www.equalmoney.org

To support Desteni while educating yourself about who we are, how the world works, how to support ourselves to learn how to live and invest for material that will last you for a lifetime: www.eqafe.com

 

 

Interviews:

To understand the level of abuse LOVE implies, please Educate yourself with:

 

Also read:

Watch:

 

And to Educate yourself about Money Consciousness, please invest on Self Education with  The Soul of Money series

274. Child Drug Addicts

Watch the documentary Afghanistan’s Child Drug Addicts in order to become aware of how drug addictions does not only mean ‘wanting to escape’ reality out of fun and having enough money to sponsor your own escapist-habits. This time it is not that people are bored to live in a world where everything is taken care of – like in Australia where people are shooting up Ice, a new trendy drug with the money that the welfare provides them. Nor is it a drug-situation due to being sunk in depression in a world where consumption and massive forms of entertainment often lead to seeking for a ‘greater experience.’ This time it is about war and the consequences that people in Afghanistan are enduring. 

Some two years ago I became aware of the massive heroin problems in Afghanistan, but I had certainly not realized to what extent this problem was now being extended on to children. The documentary shows how children as young as 5 years old are already in ‘rehab centers’ for children, and this is just to give a name where several children are taken in order to unhook themselves from smoking opium. It is heartbreaking to see children that should be happily playing and running around just waiting for their next hit out of three times that most smoke opium during the day.

 

Some of them also explain how they became addicts after their families were killed in bombings conducted by the Americans, many of them lose their limbs and are left to ‘live’ a life of mitigating the pain and suffering with drugs. Some others get hooked on drugs and pay for them with sexual services, which means that the addiction drives them to become child prostitutes in order to fund their addiction. Why? Because they are kids, there are no jobs and they are left without families and parents that are either sent to wars, are killed in attacks or simply have no money/ support at all. When the reporter asks them why they don’t rather spend their money on food, they explain how buying drugs is cheaper, where food would cost over 3 pounds and opium costs around 2 – they have no other food than some tea and some stale old bread to feed 9 people – yes, reading again: 9 people.

 

Drug addiction is condemned by the Islam and as such, families that are all hooked on heroin refrain from asking for help because of the major consequences that would mean if people find out they are taking drugs.  ‘Underneath the bridge’ is no longer just a sappy song from a 90’s band from someone that went through a broken home in the ever-glooming America, it becomes now the definitions of the several places around Kabul where people – mostly males – gather to shoot up heroin, because it is cheaper than having to buy food.

 

Younger people experience depressions after having to witness the horrors of wars and I mean, we can look at the type of idiosyncrasy that we support in this world wherein we go to the movies to witness such violence from afar, while others are just put through such horrors in real time, being affected for their entire lives because losing your parents in such attacks definitely means that as a 11 year old you are bound to have no support in a world system and government that is currently busy funding and fighting wars than any form of solution to take care of the people that are becoming addicts as a direct consequence of the availability/cheap price, the hopeless environment and the ubiquitous addicts that certainly have no future other than continuing numbing their hunger pains and gathering to go by through another day.

Is this life? I had written about ‘living to get high’ but this is essentially the opposite: getting high to ‘go by’ through life, because there is barely any indicative of care and support for these people, this is a real crisis that we are happily unaware of when using drugs to have ‘more fun/ a greater dopamine experience’ while people in real harsh conditions are using drugs to numb the pain and suffering.

All of these men could be healthy and working to create a world in which I am sure they would be more than willing to cooperate building – what are the chances for you to have a will to live in an environment where everyone is doing drugs to numb the lack of food and support to live in healthy and harmonious conditions – to witness these people through the comfort of our own houses already makes us responsible enough to realize that we are the only ones that can create a change for THEM, because they are powerless, hopeless and helpless and so are their children that have no opportunities to have healthy living environments, education and actual joy to live, there is nothing like that. Seeing bodies scattered everywhere, putting your own family members on plastic bags and wanting to kill yourself out of the horrors of war is certainly the type of damage that will take lots of will to live to stand up from and support. But not even the ‘greatest intentions’ will make a difference here, no amount of positive thinking will make a change – this is about changing the system in order to ensure that no single child resorts to child prostitution, child labor and drug dealing in order to support their own addictions.

 

This is all quite a sad situation indeed, but I share what Mykey shared in relation to finding out the actual truth of the reality “not to let the reality shock be possessed by the mind by victimizing yourself towards it and creating a personality about it, but to remain stable and directive in the decision to CHANGE this.”

 

As I write this, I realize that certainly creating an experience about this would only be self interest – we cannot wallow and use another’s experience as another excuse to not stand up, it is precisely the opposite which is realizing that their suffering is our suffering and as such, there cannot be a single living being experiencing ‘bliss’ while a single child starves to death or resorts to drugs to mitigate hunger pains.

 

From ‘Wikitravel’ on Kabul:

WARNING: Travelling in Afghanistan is extremely dangerous and is strongly discouraged. The current Afghan government has little control over large parts of the country; in particular, most of the South and East including Kabul is effectively a war zone. Threats are unpredictable and the situation remains volatile.

Trips should be meticulously planned and travellers should keep abreast of the latest security situation throughout their stay. If, despite the risks, you still find yourself heading there, see War zone safety and the “Stay safe” section below.

http://wikitravel.org/en/Kabul

 

These are the ‘warnings’ for us people with money, staying away from what is obviously a non-secure area to live in – but, what about the people that Have No Option to get away from there other than living in extreme poverty and not really knowing if a bomb will soon drop upon their houses, killing their family members and leaving them homeless.

 

Once again the solution for this situation is certainly to provide equal support to all living beings, to STOP ALL WARS as we can see that the results of ‘fighting war against terror’ is becoming a constant actual threat and crisis at all levels for the people that then resort to drugs to mitigate the pain and suffering and lack of food/proper living support and families that are often involved in being ‘casualties of war’ that no one is currently taking responsibility for.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to ever think or believe that drugs could only get you ‘high’ for fun and pleasure, without realizing that drugs are also being used to mitigate the pains and suffering that the lack of living support creates – and this means that I have been unaware of how drug addictions are formed in order to ‘go by’ through life and create a painless day to day living due to the horrors that they witness on a daily basis, which is the direct result of myself accepting and allowing this current world system that is not supporting all living beings to live and instead, is funding wars to go and kill and destroy people’s lives.

This is a humanitarian self forgiveness because we tend to live in our little bubbles of anxiety, depression and hopelessness while having daily meals to eat, an education and all the opportunities in the world to have a dignify living and we usually squander all of this because of a single self experience of ‘not being good enough/ not feeling ‘happy’ or experiencing any other inner-flaw, where we tend to forget what Real suffering and Real problems are in this world.

This is how when and as I see myself wanting to just ‘escape’ for a moment from this reality and create a personality out of it in terms of feeling hopeless, helpless – I stop and I breathe – and I realize that in my hands/ in our hands that have enough money and education to live is the key to present, promote and implement a new living system that will ensure that these atrocities are never again part of our reality.

I commit myself to live as the strength that is requires every single day in order to never forget what it is that I am living for, which is to support myself to become an example of what living life should be, and not allow myself to be ‘down’ by what I witness in this world but instead remain stable and self directive to ensure I contribute to change this situation into a best for all living environment.

 

Sure, this will take time but the more we wait the more we will continue witnessing these atrocities from a comfortable position. We are saying: there is no need to reach the bottom to realize there is something inherently wrong in this world, yet the point is clear: we will have to do this if we want to remain living in this world/ Earth. Who we are as the physical body Does Not require drugs to live, who we are as physical beings would not allow each other living organism to slowly but surely self-destruct – everything that is currently ‘wrong’ is the result of who we have become as the mind and for that, we require to understand how we are all inherently affected by all the matters in this world, no matter if you believe yourself to be ‘far away’ from it, so please research Desteni and how the monetary system operates according to made up beliefs that are not taking into consideration the real requirements of people on Earth.

 

In the Equal Money Capitalist system where will be no children taking drugs, no adults shooting up heroin underneath the bridge, no more humans crying for their families lost in wars. No more lack of food, proper living houses, water, sanitation services and will get all the medical support that currently doesn’t exist for them. No more children working, no more child prostitutes, no more children losing their childhood while waiting for the next hit.

 

 

A Contrast in Drug Addiction Documentaries:

 

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Addictions in the Equal Money System « Equal Money for ALL as LIFE

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270. How to Face Consequence and Stop Running Away from it

Self Corrective Statements and Self Commitments on Escaping from the Inner Hell creates the Outer Hell

Continuing from:

220. Drug Culture: Mad Society as a Lifestyle

 

 

When and as I see myself fearing to face the consequence of what I have become and seek a way  out of it to not face me, to not consider taking responsibility for what I have done and become – I stop and I breathe – I realize that there is one single point that I cannot ever escape and that is myself, my mind as what I have become and in this, there is no point in prolonging the point as that can only feed the mind that thrives in friction  and conflict –

I realize that fear is a great self-manipulation aspect for us to victimize ourselves toward our own creation, it is a reason, excuse and justification to exist as energy instead of existing as a physical self-directive being.

I commit myself to stop participating in fear when facing the consequences of myself and instead direct me to take self responsibility and stop all self-manipulation to seek for quick fixes out of my responsibility – I realize that I am the only one that can take Self Responsibility for myself, and that this is inevitable no matter where I am in this existence. Literally.

 

When and as I see myself having the thought of vanishing/ disappearing, simply wanting to not-exist in order to not have to face the consequences of what I have become – I stop and I breathe – I realize this thought leads me to the inertia of not moving, not directing myself which is a waste of time really – thus I direct myself to breathe, stand up, physically move in order to realize that there is nothing preventing me from taking responsibility for what I am and what I have become, this is simply a matter of deciding to face myself and stopping participation in the distraction of my thoughts.

 

I commit myself to face myself in my reality and stop any thought that deviates me from moving physically, the attention is thus here as breath and focusing on immediately directing myself toward a solution, which implies actually writing out the pattern/ point faced in order to structure specific corrections that must be implemented by myself and as such realize that I do not require to ‘fly away’ in my thoughts if I instead decide to direct myself physically and be at ease for real from that.

 

When and as I see myself creating backchat in relation to having ‘no way out’ from my self-created experience and believing everything is fucked up, that we’re going nowhere, wanting to give up – I stop and I breathe – I realize there is no real giving up in this world other than dying and as such, not even death will be a safe-place from facing myself and my responsibility – thus, I direct myself to be and become active in that moment to look at how to instead direct myself to look at the problem I am facing and as such direct myself toward a solution, as I see and realize that wanting to give up/ hide/ run away from myself is simply a point of conflict that does not support myself to Live, but only to entertain a mind that seeks for further ways to maintain oneself in friction and conflict – thus

 

I commit myself to stand one and equal to my mind to create solutions for the problems/ situations I am facing, wherein I ensure I take on the directive principle of myself and my reality and for that, no desire to run away/ thinking everything is fucked is required.

 

When and as I see myself wanting to ‘make it all stop’ in my mind, I stop and I breathe within the realization that thinking about stopping is only enhancing the self-experience – thus it is pointless to think ‘I want to make it all stop,’ since the stability of who and what we are is always here as the physical as breath.

 

I commit myself to remind myself to realize that the stability of the physical body is always here ‘one breath away’ and that any desire to seek for a better self experience is only another way to escape responsibility, which is unacceptable and as such, commit myself to stand up and walk the necessary steps to get to a point of stability and self-responsibility, to ensure that I in fact face my reality and my decisions made.

 

When and as I see myself imagining that it will take me a long time to solve the situation/ problem and go into an experience of helplessness and gloom, I stop and I breathe – I realize this is another self manipulation in order for me to Not take self responsibility and create an excuse to not face my reality. Thus

I commit myself to direct myself as my mind to instead plan a way to walk the corrections and take self responsibility, as I see that there is no point in feeding imaginations that lead me to further excuses and justifications to not stand up. Thus I stop manipulating myself and face the reality of myself and what I have become.

 

When and as I see myself going into imagination and experiential flashback of immediately grabbing onto something or someone when facing a point of conflict – drug, relationship, food, going out, avoiding myself with any form of entertainment – I stop and I breathe.  I direct myself back to physical reality and deliberately stop participating in the desire to ‘have something’ to ‘make myself feel better/ help me cope with the situation’

I realize that the reality of what I have become is that which I am Here as a living being and as such, imagining to ‘run away from it’ through positive experiences that I have defined within my mind as such will only prolong the process of facing myself here, physically and in a stable manner.

 

I commit myself to stop participation in any enticing thought to consume something in order to feel better about myself, as I see that this is a temporary fix that has never lead me to an actual living stable and consistent solution.

 

When and as I see myself experiencing apathy, dullness, sadness and a general lack of ‘energy’ and wanting to give up on myself, I stop and I breathe – I realize that I am actually manipulating myself to feel this way through all the thoughts and backchat allowed – thus I direct myself to stop wallowing in this mind-create experience and as such, focus on the constancy and consistency of who I am as the physical, as breath, where as long as I am breathing I realize I am able to perfectly move myself toward a solution instead of hooking myself onto reactions that only support the mind.

 

I commit myself to stop creating self experiences  of self-doom and gloom in relation to ‘having to face myself/ my consequences’ as I realize these are not self supportive at all, and instead direct myself to act upon the solutions that will lead to an actual consequence that will benefit myself and all equally – no longer being bound to a single self-definition of ‘having to cope with my reality’ but being sound and stable to face it and take responsibility for it as myself.

 

When and as I see myself yawning and wanting to sleep, slouching and a general heaviness on my eyes, I breathe and I realize that I have to take some fresh air, move around and not give into the physical wallowing experience- and instead direct myself to breathe and focus on the solutions that I have to lay out in front of me.

 

When and as I see myself biting the lower part of my index finger, I stop and I breathe – I realize that I am biting my own direction and as such creating a  mind experience about that which I have already propitiated at a mind level. Thus

I commit myself to breathe, focus on my physical body, move, get fresh air whenever I am feeling tired/ down/ wanting to sleep as this is a clear pattern of wanting to avoid having to face myself.

 

When and as I see myself wanting to compulsively clean something or wanting to go out and ‘get this one thing I require no matter what’ I stop and I breathe – I realize that this is compulsive behavior wherein I use such points/ events as an excuse to not have to face myself as my responsibility toward my world/ reality and seek to ‘get out’ for a while, which leads to a pattern of evasion. Thus

 

I commit myself to stop being compulsive or impulsive in my decisions that lead to a prompt ‘get away’ from responsibility, which is a flag point in order to always be common sensical about our activities and decision, to ensure I am not directing myself as y mind to seek a ‘way out’ – which thus requires me to slow down and always ensure I am in fact making the decisions of what to do, instead of creating a point of ‘easy way out’ by finding excuses of ‘what I require to do’ which is usually only a distraction from what I in fact have to do and give direction to.

 

When and as I see myself doing nothing, being idle and as such ‘waiting’ for the right moment to snap out of the freak of having to face myself, take responsibility for myself, I stop and I breathe – I realize that If I don’ move then nothing will change or move.

 

I realize that we have created this world as the perfect ‘entertainment center’ wherein we have dedicated our lifetimes to only feel good, seek the ‘good self experience’ while avoiding to look at how we have created all the bad/ negative that is certainly the outflows and consequences due to us having wanted to have a quick fix to our problems and flaws that are generated at a thought level, which implies that: the more I avoid facing myself = the more I contribute to maintain our current world and reality ‘as is’ because we have feared consequence so much, that we don’t want to give up and stop participating in everything that has kept us in a bubble of ‘everything is relatively fine,’ without realizing the abuse and unsustainability that such bubble exists as, because it is only through having enough money to live that one can actually not do anything and still manage to wake up the next day, because people that have no security and support to live each day, Truly live each day getting what they require to eat to ‘live.’ This implies that instead of us wanting to avoid facing the responsibility of how we created such a reality that we all want to run away from, we all become self responsible beings beginning with ourselves to spot and identify where and how we have contributed to this life-long apathetic behavior, fearful manipulative behavior to not face our responsibility and create solutions for ourselves in this world.

 

I realize that it is only through individual ‘awakening’ which means: realizing the problems in this world, taking the decision to face ourselves/ what we have become, take the self directive decision to STOP participating in everything that prevents life from being lived – beginning with our thoughts, feelings and emotions, stop wanting to consume/ get high/ get a relationship/ run away literally from our reality and as such face ourselves as everything that we are and have become as this is the key to actually getting to know ourselves and realizing that in the mind we won’t ever be able to solve the problems in our world and reality, but only through physical self-corrective processes wherein we deliberately start caring for ourselves and each other, to stop being subsumed in a self-experience of doom and gloom and instead, start looking at and caring to see what is the current state of the world we live in and as such, become part of the solution through stopping self-interest and individualized self-experiences and focus on creating solutions that are best for the whole, that includes ourselves as well.

 

I commit myself to stop wanting to get any form of energetic high as a positive experience to not face myself and my consequences as I see that the accumulation of consequence is pervasive currently in our reality and leads ourselves nowhere else but the constant and continuous self-experience of being ‘flawed’ and ‘wrong’ as a justification to not stand up – thus it is a commitment to stop Feeling bad about ourselves and the world situation that WE have participated and created, and focus on how to stop and correct the patterns of the past that we already know had led us nowhere but toward further consequence as humanity. We created the problems, we create the solutions.

 

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269.The Inner-Hell creates the Outer-Hell

 

The pattern unfolds the following way: one faces a point wherein Self Responsibility was neglected, wherein we didn’t measure the consequences of our thoughts, words and deeds and as such ‘all hell breaks lose’ within ourselves, because then we are faced with consequence, and we realize there is No way out from it this timeright?

Continuing from:

220. Drug Culture: Mad Society as a Lifestyle

Fear Dimension:

I will have to face the ugly truth of myself/ what I have become

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear having to face myself as the point of neglect that I allowed to develop and exist due to my own irresponsibility toward myself as my thinking processes that lead to a physical consequence wherein now there are manifested consequences that I realize I have to face and as such

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear having to endure the consequences and become fearful of facing my reality, without realizing that all the time I had the ability to take responsibility for myself, my words, thoughts and actions – but I didn’t – thus, I realize that fear is a convenient self-experience to victimize myself toward that which I have created without self-awareness – which means that

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use Fear as a way to cover up the fact that I neglected my own responsibility toward myself as my thoughts, my actions, my relationships, my own physical body and within this I have deliberately made myself ‘fearful’ to not see and face the reality that I’ve become, which is every single thought, every single word, every single relationship toward others and myself that have now caused a consequential outflow that has damaged myself and others, just because I had not considered what actually caring for myself in fact means.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to equally be fearful to face and confront the reality that this world has become, without realizing that this world is the collective accumulation of all individual neglect that I am actually participating and existing as myself – which implies that I cannot blame ‘the state of the world’ for how I experience myself, as I am the one that has decided how to experience myself through and as thoughts, feelings and emotions, never ever realizing that these are the mind-mechanisms wherein we eventually only get ‘drowned’ in our own self-experience and neglect the actual physical reality that is being constantly abused for us to maintain our personal heavens and inner hells, just because we haven’t realized the level of self-destruction that who we are as the mind has become upon this physical reality, which is what we really are/what should be a point of stability for all to actually live.

 

Thought Dimension:

Just vanishing, everything disappearing, me being doing nothing at all

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when facing the consequence of my actions/ inaction and neglect toward my self responsibility, resort to a momentary thought of just wanting it all to end, just vanish and not think and experience anything, which is the pattern of wanting to avoid realizing that: nothing and no one has created such ‘unbearable self experience’ within me other than myself through constantly and continuously only having sought to ‘feel good’ and avoid taking responsibility toward myself and my world – this implies that

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to and desire to escape the mind as all the inner-hell/ turmoil that I have created within myself, without realizing that such inner-hell is in fact only created by the same mind that I have blindly participated in as constant thoughts, internal conversations/ backchat, reactions, judgments, emotions and feelings that exist as the energetic system that I have given attention to, which has now become ‘who I am’ and a such, out of my self-directive principle because of not having realized that Who I Am is the stability of the physical body, and that all the inner turmoil is indicating a point that I am not taking self responsibility for, a point that I have separated myself from and must investigate – but instead, allowed the inner-hell/ turmoil to become ‘who I am’ until it became unbearable that I did Not direct myself toward a solution and allowed myself to be overwhelmed by the consequence, which has now lead me to want to ‘vanish’ and just ‘scape’ through ‘plugging myself out’ through any means such as any substance, activity or person that I have defined as a ‘feel good’ experience, without realizing that in seeking for ‘feeling good’ again, I am only compounding the consequence of the neglect of sorting out that which ‘made me feel bad’ in the first place, which is myself and my own disregard to take actions to align and correct my life in order to function as what’s best for myself/ all equally.

 

Backchat/ Internal Conversations:

– I rather just give up, there is no point in solving that

– It’s done and I fucked up

– I knew this would lead nowhere

– I just want to make it all stop

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use thoughts in order to justify my irresponsibility toward myself and my reality with words like ‘I rather just give it all up, there is no point in solving that’ wherein I have believed that ‘giving up’ is an option I can take and that any point of solution is ‘pointless’ due to me having delegated the responsibility toward myself / my world toward ‘others changing first’ and as such, have used the ‘state of the world’ as a reason, excuse and justification to not take responsibility for myself and create an entire mind-possession of apathy/ depression/ sadness and despair that leads toward a ‘giving up’ self-experience, without realizing how it is in this very experience that we give Into the mind of self-interest, wherein I only then care about ‘How I Feel’ / ‘How I am Experiencing Myself as My Mind,’ wherein one then seeks to ‘feel better’ by using/ consuming/ doing something that will take me to the ‘positive experience again,’ which is how I have neglected to take Self Responsibility at all times, because of having always only been concerned about ‘How I Feel,’ regardless of who and what I am abusing within this.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use self-judgment as ‘It’s done and I fucked up’ which is a recurrent patter whenever I actually seek a form of companion and condescendence for my own created misery and neglect, which is just another form of using words to abuse myself and others in order to cover up and justify my lack of self-direction when it comes to taking responsibility for every single word, self-experience that I have within me – within this realizing that such words as ‘It’s done and I fucked up’ lead to a ‘no remedy’ situation wherein one leads oneself to the ‘bottom of the pit’ which is just another form of self-victimization to not have to face the reality and consequences that I have manifested and participated in equally.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to accept the words ‘I know this would lead me nowhere’ wherein the fact of Knowing as a conscious awareness of the potential damage/consequences created by myself were deliberately ignored due to me having always sought to feel good/ feel at ease/ do the least effort which amounts onto a series of points neglected/ avoided/ deliberately not looked at/ investigated such as my own thinking patterns that I have fed and created into this ‘unbearable self-experience’ of which I seek to escape from through wanting to ‘give up’ on myself/ life and everything, without realizing that who we are as the physical body does not give up on self until death, and that it is only through a mind possession that we can be seeking to ‘give up’ which indicates that it is who we are/ have become as the mind that is the first point of self-awareness that we must develop and consider in order to prevent these forms of mind-possession to take place.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create the backchat ‘I just want to make it all stop’ wherein the clear self-experience is that of victimization wherein I deliberately seek to ‘stop’ the consequences that I have participated in creating and manifesting every time that I accepted and allowed myself to follow my thoughts, my desires, wants and needs that would not consider first doing/ acting and directing that which ensures my physical stability and stable-sound relationships toward others and myself, my environment – and within this

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realizing that within this ‘I want to make it all just stop’ I am only existing as this selfish-decision that is not considering in fact ALL as myself as an actual living organism that I am reducing to a problem in my mind, which I then seek to ‘stop’ and ‘get rid of it’ without having taken a moment to look at myself, my words, thoughts, internal conversations, emotions and feelings that have lead me to create the physical consequences that I am now facing as myself.

I realize that this consequence that we have become is often sought to be avoided and shoved aside, which is what leads us to immediately seek to ‘feel good’ again, to ‘make it up’ for ourselves again, which is unacceptable since it is in fact those same ‘feel good’ self experiences that have lead us to neglect ourselves as physical beings, this world and all the actual living species that are enabling our ‘lives’ to continue, which means that: without the physical support of the Earth in itself, my ‘inner-hell’ would not be able to be fed and I would not exist – which implies that we are constantly abusing ourselves every time that we rather give into this mind possession of ‘not feeling alright’ and ‘wanting to escape’ instead of actually looking at the responsibility that we all hold toward this current world-wide/ global state of crisis that is clearly generated by all of us collectively and as such

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fail to see how ‘how I feel’ and ‘who I am’ as the mind, as what I have accepted and allowed myself to be and become is defining and co-creating the world outside of ourselves, which is not really separate from how I experience myself in the ‘inside’ as the expression of abuse that I have become as the mind is the current creative force and maintenance of the abusive status quo in the ‘outer-world’ as the current ‘outer-hell’ we have become as humanity within this world, abusing it in order to fuel our mind possessions, which is unacceptable.

Imagination:

Negative imagination: having to spend a long time solving the problem/ situation

Positive imagination: numbing myself out any form of drug/ stimulant/ activity/ inactivity

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use my mind and imagination to extrapolate the problem/ situation I am facing as a ‘worst case scenario’ such as having to spend a long time and having to implement a lot of effort to solve the problem/ create a solution to what I have done and become, without realizing that in this process of imagination, I am constructing just another reason and excuse to not move myself, not face my consequence and instead, become deliberately negligent toward myself and my reality, seeking for a ‘quick fix’ to sort it all out, which is usually through using and consuming something that will take me to this positive self experience – therefore

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to after I have participated in the negative imagination of all the possible outcomes of having to create solutions to the problems I have created and manifested within myself and my reality equally, I veer toward the ‘positive imagination’ such as wanting to immediately feel good again, wanting to consume and experience something that I have defined as ‘good’ and ‘positive’ which is mostly created through any form of drug, stimulant, activity or inactivity as well as relationships that I have used in my world in order to further ‘numb myself down’ and not face my reality and the consequences I am running away from, which is quite pointless and a waste of time if I realize that there is no actual way to ‘run away from myself’ in my imagination, as eventually we all have to face our reality and what we have become.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use my memories and imaginations as a way to program within myself an immediate way to ‘make myself feel better’ by going from the negative outcome to the positive outcome that I then seek to live-out as my reality, creating further consequences of evading my responsibility instead of actually stopping all participation in the same evasive behavior, place the cards on the table so to speak and ground myself as the physical to start looking at solutions instead of seeking further ways to ‘run away’ from it.

 

Reactions:

-Dread, dullness, apathy, wanting to give up

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a negative self-experience as emotions of dread, dullness, apathy as a general ‘wanting to give up’ self experience that I haven’t seen and realized represent the most common form of self-manipulation and excuse to not have to face oneself and the consequences created by my own negligence and deliberate unawareness, which means that, I have accepted and allowed myself to become subject to my own mind to define ‘who I am’ according to the conditions suiting my desires or not – and if not, I then use all forms of thoughts, internal conversations and imaginations to lead myself to embody this ‘giving up’ self experience, which I then believe is who I am, without realizing that is is only a mind-entity as all words, thoughts, imaginations, memories as patterns that I have diminished myself to be and become, without realizing I am in fact giving my breath/ my power away to fuel these self-destructive self-experiences without creating a solution to actually align/ correct the point I am becoming emotional about – within this

 

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to realize how any emotional experience is a deliberate self-manipulation and distraction to not have to face who I am and what I have become as the mind that I have believed is ‘everything that I am,’ constantly seeking to feel good/ be at peace in order to not face the inherent self-experience of being unfulfilled, unsatisfied, not good enough, never getting anything right, never succeeding, looking at the world as one big fuckup and allow all of these thoughts to become a self-experience that in no way are in fact contributing to my own well being and as such are no solution to the collective well being.

I realize that we have always resorted to complain about ‘how we feel/ how we see the world’ but in no way do we even conceive that it is ourselves only that have created this imbalance within and without in our reality, and that the actual beings that are suffering and having to endure the consequences of our mind-possessed decisions in life, are all the animals, plants, environment that we literally consume and abuse to constantly seek a ‘feel good’ point at a mind level, without being aware of the physical abuse and depletion and destruction that takes place within our body as our own physical flesh and without as the Earth’s resources that we literally burn up to generate Energy to ‘feel good.’

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Justify my experience as this reaction of ‘giving up’ and being in this emotional turmoil without realizing that in being and becoming so, I am Not supporting anyone in this reality at all, I am only supporting further self-abuse of myself and everyone else in this world, as I realize that whatever I accept and allow within myself is not an ‘isolated problem,’ but it is part of that which co-creates everyone’s self-experience as well, because the moment that we are ‘not alright’ within ourselves, all our relationships toward other beings in our world will also not be alright and as such, the entire world is woven and created and stemming from our own relationships that we have neglected toward ourselves first as our own mind.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to go into a positive experience whenever I am ‘down’ which is my self-created victimization state and within such mind-possession, seek to ‘feel good’ and ‘feel better’ through wanting to simply give-up about everything in my reality, wanting everything to just ‘disappear’ which is an apparent easy way out to ourselves and the consequences created, without realizing that I am the only one that has created such ‘unpleasant experience’ due to the relationship toward myself as my mind, my physical body and every other living being that I coexist with, which has never been considered in equality and self support.

 

Physical Dimension:

– Yawning, wanting to sleep, slouching, heavy eyes, tiredness

– Doing something compulsively like pulling out  my hair or cleaning something, going out to ‘get something’ that I don’t precisely need

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to yawn and ‘want to sleep’ whenever I am facing a point of consequence and as such, want to evade having to go through the actual process of self responsibility toward myself and my world

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to slouch and have a general self-experience of being ‘weak’ and ‘tired’ which I have accepted as an actual self-experience, without realizing that this is only the externalization of the thoughts and emotions that I have accepted and allowed myself to be and become – which implies abusing my physical body and its stability, deliberately manipulating myself to ‘feel bad’ in order to justify further evasion of my responsibilities in my reality, which is unacceptable since it is a physical-self manipulation that is only supporting who I am as the mind and not who I really am and what I am willing to accept and allow of myself as the physical body that is actually Unconditional in its expression as long as I feed myself properly and breathe and exercise and relate to my physical environment in a common sensical manner = considering what is best for myself and all equally.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience a general heaviness in my body when having to confront the consequences that I have become as the outflow of my participation in the mind, wherein having heavy eyes becomes the ‘way that I see’ the world and everything, which is then an indication that I am becoming and embodying a mind possession to not SEE the reality of myself and what I have become, but instead seek further excuses and justifications to escape and evade my reality as a general ‘I am not feeling well’ which is obviously the consequence of who I am as the mind upon my physical body – which is the point of self responsibility to align here.

Consequences:

– Wasting time, having to catch up while I regain my stability, missing out great opportunities of self-change due to giving into the energetic experience of ‘I’m doomed/I’m fucked/ I lost’

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience that the consequences are just ‘too great’ and ‘too vast’ to face as what I am as my mind, what I’ve imposed onto my physical body and as such extend such consequence to my physical reality as this world, wherein every problem that we see is the result of us not living-as physical beings that consider at all times what’s best for all, but have become mind-possessed bodies that only seek to generate good feelings, positive experiences at the expense of the world we consume, exploit and destroy in order to generate our personal heavens.

 

I realize that every single moment that I face consequence, it is not a point for me to become sad, go into self pity and self destructive behavior about it but instead use the opportunity to face, correct and align the relationship that I have neglected that has caused a physical consequence within me and my world – this is thus the pattern to  become aware of at all times: seeing this world and all its ‘flaws’ and ‘problems’ not as an indication only of ‘how fucked we all are’ and sink into depression, but instead make a deliberate physical decision to no longer be willing to accept and allow ourselves to be subsumed by self destructive and evasive behavior, because this would only pile up into the already piled-up mess that we’ve created in this world – we are here to stop and make a declaration of who we are willing to be and live as, which is the decision that won’t make us ‘feel good’ such as the rush experienced with any drug as a positive experience , but will generate physical, stable and sound solutions to generate an actual wellbeing for all living beings, where I am certain, no more addictions and self destruction will be sought, since we will all be equally aware of giving and doing what’s best for all in the realization of who we really are as Equals.

 

Self-Commitment Statements to come  –

Further support:

 

 

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Face Thy Demons – Great Support here:


268. Escaping from the Inner-Hell

 

The pattern unfolds the following way: one faces a point wherein Self Responsibility was neglected, wherein we didn’t measure the consequences of our thoughts, words and deeds and as such ‘all hell breaks lose’ within ourselves, because then we are faced with consequence, and we realize there is No way out from it this timeright?

And in this second guessing of having to inevitably face the point which implies realizing the neglected responsibility and walk a process of writing, self forgiveness and self corrective application, one decides that there is a ‘better way’/ alternative way to ‘cope’ with it – and that’s where some action and process to evade the consequence emerge: anything that can become a point to occupy our mind with, anything that can give us a sense of satisfaction, a feel good experience, a momentary resort, a reward after having to face such consequences – one seeks to immediately want to ‘get lost’ from it all for a moment, to just drop it all, leave everything and disappear.

 

Yes this is a mind pattern that leads to addiction – why? because the momentary high to evade responsibility becomes such that we would rather just remain in that ‘comfortable numbness’ wherein one is literally doing nothing other than finding various ways to avoid having to face the consequences, walk the correction and ‘face the music’ as they say. Once one is down to Earth from such temporary high, one seek for something else… and so it becomes quite a straining pattern because the more we resist to face the consequence, the more the guilt, remorse, shame, regret, fears, judgments, backchats accumulate, until we feed the entity so much that it becomes quite unbearable to handle, it is ‘alive’ in itself, because we have essentially fed it through our own participation in thoughts, emotions, feelings, actions/ inactions to not face the point. This is when we believe that it is simply ‘too late,’ we are doomed and essentially give up whatever we were doing, which is quite a pattern that we all go into: we hide in our caves instead of actually facing it, creating solutions and sorting out the point.

220. Drug Culture: Mad Society as a Lifestyle

If one is not self honest, this pattern turns into self-victimization and you end up blaming the world, parents, teachers, government, society, ‘the world’ and ‘how fucked everything is’ for our experience – but, what we haven’t realized is that it’s not about anyone or anything else but ourselves, really. We have seen how the environment and the lack of equal support Does contribute to addictive behaviors – however in the end, the ultimate say comes from ourselves: we are the ones that decide to either stand up or remain in such self-destructive behavior, which is essentially destroying ourselves due to fearing facing our own irresponsibility and negligence and actually place the cards on the table to see how we caused the problem and as such, how to walk the solution.

 

Within victimization, blame, regret, pity and a deliberate desire to ‘let go of the bad/ negative/ evil/ malevolent’ that we have fed within ourselves due to having neglected ourselves/ our reality,  we turn to love and become masters of light, consciousness and a so-called spirituality, we try and cover up our actual inner-demons to hide the actual reality that we realize exists within ourselves, but didn’t dare to face, and as such, hide in the opposite side behind positive thinking, love, spirituality, blessings and a general imagination that leads to this comforting fluffy paradise after death, wherein one rejoices in these custom-made heavens in order to ‘soften the blow’ of having to remain and keep living on this Earth, which is apparently and seemingly easier than actually being willing to see the truth of ourselves, and take responsibility for it, which certainly won’t be nice and pretty – however, it must be done no matter what.

The other option is completely going to absolute self-doom and gloom where we see no way out other than self-destructing, and that’s where drugs, alcohol and various other forms of self harm emerge – we can also have a mix of being a nice positive thinker and be addicted to some drug to enhance the experience, a positive mr. self destruct with new age backchat of ‘everything will be just fine’ while lighting up the next joint. You get the picture.

 

In all of this, we are only feeding more energy to that which we avoid looking at/ facing as ourselves. This ‘escapism’ becomes quite a difficult thing to do for a long time when one has already made the firm decision  to not fool oneself any longer and take responsibility for anything we face. This also implies that the nagging thought of Knowing that we are evading ourselves is simply unbearable, because we Know we cannot deceive ourselves. We complain about the world being one big Lie yet we still deceive ourselves by giving breath and time to that which we already Know is not supportive. That is not congruent and when one has decided to become an actual living being, there is no way other than facing the points, walking the solutions – the agony can only be prolonged for as long as one is willing to agonize through the constant thinking, waiting, hoping, tormenting ourselves and talking back and forth about ‘everything that is wrong’ and create our own storm in a glass of water. A general suggestion is to realize that waiting and hoping for something to clear our consequence is futile, hiding from it is futile, prolonging the confrontation only prolongs the unnecessary suffering – so, why not facing it right away?

 

Fear Dimension:

I will have to face the ugly truth of myself

 

Thought Dimension:

Just vanishing, everything disappearing, me being doing nothing at all

 

Backchat/ Internal Conversations:

– I rather just give up, there is no point in solving that

– It’s done and I fucked up

– I knew this would lead nowhere

– I just want to make it all stop

 

Imagination:

Negative imagination: having to spend a long time solving the problem/ situation

Positive imagination: numbing myself out any form of drug/ stimulant/ activity/ inactivity

 

Reactions:

-Dread, dullness, apathy, wanting to give up

 

Physical Dimension:

– Yawning, wanting to sleep, slouching, heavy eyes, tiredness

– Doing something compulsively like pulling out  my hair or cleaning something, going out to ‘get something’ that I don’t precisely need

 

Consequences:

– Wasting time, having to catch up while I regain my stability, missing out great opportunities of self-change due to giving into the energetic experience of ‘I’m doomed/I’m fucked/ I lost’

 

 

Next post we’ll walk these dimensions with Self Forgiveness, Self Corrective Statements and Self Commitments.

Further support:

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Blogs:

 

Face Thy Demons – Great Support here:

2013 – The Future of Consciousness – When Thoughts intend Harm to another (Part 1) – Part 3
2013 – The Future of Consciousness – When Thoughts intend Harm to another (Part 2) – Part 4

 

And to understand how we ‘fall’ in our own doom from the greatest innate self-experiences lived as children:

Why your Weakest Points are your Greatest strength – Life Review

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