Category Archives: buying

203. The Acceptance of Heaven is the Allowance of Hell

As humanity we have walked life after life not questioning anything in our reality, learning that things are ‘how they are’ because ‘that’s how it works’ and swallowing up this chill-pill-answer which in my case, I swallowed with some discontent initially – however, because I had no physical suffering, lack of food, lack of a house, lack of family, lack of education and learned that even though I was seeing suffering on the streets, being witness to hideous acts of madness – all was apparently ‘fine’ and we could still ‘enjoy’ and ‘have fun’ and seek for our greatest excitement and monetary success,  I simply learned to turn a ‘blind eye’ and being perfectly aware of every moment that I would compare my reality to that of children my age that had to be working on the streets, knocking door by door asking for food and clothes, me only reacting with absolute powerlessness every time, feeling sorry for a few minutes – then forgetting about it and continue with my happy go round life that was possible due to Money. Because, in the end,  what one learns at home when being in a middle-class society is to always aiming ‘higher’ in the social pyramid of greed and negligence and not really bother in trying to ‘save the world/ change the world’ as I had expressed some times – all of it actually stemming from me more feeling ‘bad’ about it than really even considering at that stage me being Them as in equally being here in this world, and that the acceptance of their condition held/ sustained my own pursuit of happiness.

This is similar to the acceptance of heaven and hell and my early obsession with polarity and wondering how I could only fathom ‘staying on the good side’ of BenEVILence, doing all I could to remain always at the good eyes of that god/ spiritual all-seer that I believed in and that became- along with my reality – the constant guiding forces while growing up: the social-conditioning of focusing on ‘aiming higher’ and the spiritual context (I apparently was not raised religiously, but ‘spiritually’ lol)  of doing good/ being a good girl/ aiming to ascend to the light realms when being dead. I did not know much about ‘heaven’ or the bible – but was well aware of Hell and I knew I had to avoid it at all cost. Now, this single neglect toward Hell/ Evil/ Demons the ‘Bad’ and Dark side of reality was almost like a taboo that no one wanted to talk about, not even talking about ‘death’ which obviously, lead me to later on develop my own fascination toward all the things that had been kept ‘unknown’ to me as part of any form of Education and Family/ Society, wherein all one focuses is ‘staying on the positive side! Be Happy! Seek for your own personal improvement!’ type of reality. But still, I was not satisfied.

 

I became a news fanatic when I was probably on my early teens and this was mostly beginning to wanting to understand the financial systems because of aiming at a career in such realms initially – obviously then veering off to the total opposite within hearing everyone say how I was absolutely ‘out of my mind’ if I even think I could create a change in this world – it bummed me out and that’s how I essentially Gave UP any form of actual career that would lead me to be In the system, the core of it in the money-markets and financial deals and veered toward that which I believed was more ‘humane’ such as socials sciences, ending up in literature and arts – which till this day even after all I see hold enough opening and consideration toward that which can create a change in this world if implemented at an educational level.

 

So this is a bit of a background of how I learned to ‘turn a blind eye’ on reality, essentially quickly conforming with everything that seemed like a ‘better option’ for me to take on in my reality, which suited what I was informed I had to aim at while growing up: being a successful person like my parents, in ‘whatever’ I decided to be and become. And I accepted that constant impulse as something ‘cool’ you know? Because I was being ‘cheered up’ by my parents every time that I ‘succeeded’ in my school, yet I always never felt quite happy with it, because I would go into ‘feeling bad’ about those that were behind me and were not even able of attaining a proper mark, even if I had witnessed they tried very hard to – and so this impotence grew and grew within me, not knowing why on Earth did I have it ‘so easy’ in  my life and others were struggling – and this, was my acceptance of ‘Heaven’  as something that was meant only for a few – and denying Hell as the reality of this world, as everything that I could see and perceive as being ‘behind me/ below me’ in any form of social taxation that I became aware of while realizing that there were kids my age – 6 –7 or even less – working on the streets, asking for food, asking for coins while their mothers fed babies next to them, on the sidewalk.  I allowed myself to just pretend that it is ‘fine’ and that they are somehow having to PAY for some awful act in some past life and that’s ‘why’ they are poor/ neglected and even receiving further abuse by the authority, the level of Injustice I became aware of really ‘brought me down’ into a constant state of depression and being sad about the state of the world, only later on and even today realizing/ remind myself how this is also a state of self interest, wherein I then certainly sought to escape from this reality through the realm of imagination, pictures, inspiration, seeking ‘beauty’ in this world where there was clearly non – all as a failed attempt to redeem life in one way or another, never ever considering to what extent I had ‘signed up the contract’ to be part of the ones that wanted to ‘change the world’ outside of ourselves, feeling ‘bad’ for the unfortunate ones and essentially committing myself to want to do some ‘good’ mostly from the starting point of me not feeling guilty for having had a rather privileged lifestyle, as opposed to what I would witnessed around me.

Continuation of the Elite Character

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I had to be and become ‘successful’ just like my parents, wherein this positive attitude and positive experiences was always linked to having money in our pockets and ensuring that we became ‘good savers’ and within that, giving some charity to those that had Nothing only to ‘share what we have’ without ever really considering how the very acceptance of us being able to give to ‘unfortunate ones’ that which we could spare them, implied the acceptance and allowance of inequality in this world as ‘how the system works’ wherein instead of learning about the creation of poverty and inequality that lead to social injustice, I con.formed to only feel ‘bad’ about them and give them money fro once in a while, giving  clothes away while creating an experience of powerlessness within me about them/ the unfortunate ones, which implies how I would only feel bad about them when being in their presence – yet remaining focused on my ‘aim’ to achieve my goals in life, which was mostly linked to being a good person/ doing good to others/ caring about ‘the world’ such as the environment, pollution – I did not even consider animals that much – and essentially creating this profile of being a ‘good person’ linked to success and most importantly, linked to a reward in the afterlife.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to brush aside the fact that I did believe in a light-realm where all the dead people would go to and I was aware of the so called ‘caves of darkness’ wherein I learned that people that had, for example, been participating in wars would go to, and that I would simply have to do everything I could to avoid going there – it wasn’t called ‘hell’ but just ‘darkness’ so, I had to avoid darkness which in this world translated to avoid ending up as a ‘no one’ with no-money/ no-light in this world and within that, see all people that were with no-light/ no-money and living on the streets, being absolutely helpless as people that had probably been inherently evil in some past life and within that justifying their existence as poor people/ unfortunate ones according to that ‘law’ which I later on became aware it was called karma.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to ‘do good’ in my life not because I genuinely cared about other beings, but because ‘I’ did not want to suffer and feeling bad when looking at them and realizing that I had ‘more’ than them – essentially thus any thought or intention of ‘doing good’ was directly linked to the inherent guilt and shame that I developed when and while growing up, due to me feeling powerless to do anything about their situation and as such, always only focusing on how I would experience myself toward the ‘unfortunate ones,’ and believing that I had to redeem Myself by being a good/ careful person even though I always felt awkward while pretending to be so, yet played the act because I wanted to be seen with ‘good eyes’ by society and ultimately by whatever force I was expecting on ‘the other side’ so, I did walk a life of ‘keeping score’ of being a good person, fearing doing ‘bad things’/ fearing ‘evil people’ and only promoting a way to ‘elevate ourselves’ in social conditions and even beingness such as being more ‘enthusiastic’ about life – wanting to ‘do good’ to the ‘less fortunate ones’ yet never in fact investigating what were the causes of their current unequal stance within the system, what was the reason why they were not being helped to have a dignified living and blatantly accepted then poverty just as part of my landscape, not bothering to question about it further because of not getting straight answers about it – thus con.forming, keeping quiet, turning a blind eye and instead focusing only on my personal world and satisfaction, escalating social statuses and aiming at all times to ‘be successful’ in whatever I decided to be and become.

 

I realize that my very starting point of ‘caring for others’ has never been something natural/ genuine to me, no matter how hard I tried to believe it was. But was mostly caused by the fear of having to ‘pay’ something/ someone in the afterlife for having been a ‘bad person’ such as having a ‘good life’ and in that, neglecting others’ realities such as the unfortunate ones, wherein I then tried to ‘do my part’ by seeking to oppose the system, criticize it, judge it and essentially pointing fingers at everyone else but myself, which is how I became self-righteous about my evil  (195. The Righteousness of Evil) and took it to the extent of denying vehemently that I was an equal and one participant of everything in this world that would case suffering, death, starvation in it – it really took me a while to understand how by just the single fact of me being Here as a breathing physical being, I was equally responsible for all that which I had turned a blind eye from for a very long time and how the very position of wanting to ‘do good’/ be a good person’ to the unfortunate ones was in fact blatant self interest, seeking to stop feeling ‘bad’ about those that had no money/ no support from anyone and within that, also earning ‘points’ toward a lightish/ heavenly experience, avoiding going to the ‘caves of darkness’ that I knew simply was something to avoid.

 

This became the foundation of ‘how I functioned’ in my reality, wherein for a long time what ruled me obviously was then only looking at the positive and doing essentially what I believed was ‘proper’ in terms of seeking to give charity/ support to the ‘less fortunate ones’ once that I had attained my elitist-supreme position that I did seek after in my mind/ imagination when thinking about professions and careers that I could direct myself to, which was not up to long ago some 6 years ago wherein I aimed at becoming a ‘well known’ artist so that I could then ‘speak up and change the world!’ because I apparently never stopped wanting to ‘make a change’ but I was precisely not wanting to give up my OWN benefits in order to see how everything works in reality and how I was directly responsible for that which I was trying to ‘save’ and ‘correct’ and ‘reform’ in this reality.

 

So, I commit myself to realize and accept the fact that I have never really genuinely ‘cared’ for other beings in an absolute unconditional manner, due to me always wanting to ‘add up to my score’ of doing something good to others, instead of realizing this is a matter of principle, of Understanding reality wherein once that you Understand, See and Realize how this entire existence functions, how the world system stems from our very relationship of the mind toward the physical, how energy and substance operate, what was heaven and hell and what they represent until today within our lives, how the world system functioned with a preprogrammed life path for all beings wherein there were by design some elitist beings that became the example and role model for the masses to attempt to ‘equate’ to  – while creating poverty, starvation, the ‘ostracized’ and marginalized people that were sustaining such wealth being absolutely disregarded out of the equation of any form of satisfaction and fulfillment. And within this all, realizing that there is No excuse at all to not stand up for life, not only because of it being our absolute responsibility, but because we are it – it is not even about creating a sense of ‘duty’ within it all, it’s about self-realization of us being that whole that is currently undergoing the ‘trials and tribulations’ that are nothing but the outcome of having lived entire lives only seeking to maintain an apparent ‘well being’ at the expense of others that were deliberately quieted/ shut down or even ostracized from the system in order for the majority to seek after the ‘good life’ here and in the hereafter, which became the most well known lie to be Sould in existence, not even only in humanity.

 

Thus I commit myself to realize that the starting point of myself within this process of Self-Equality and Oneness in Self Honesty implies realizing and recognizing the fact that one was initially motivated by obtaining something ‘good’ out of this, some form of ‘reward’ for walking process, without realizing that it is not about changing the world ‘out there’ for others, but changing My world With others – which is something you can read at Heaven’s Journey To Life which clarifies to the exact T. this subtle differentiation that makes actually a big difference with regards to the approach of ‘changing the world’/ wanting to go do good’ and all the points that we must consider before even being able to consider any form of ‘change’ within ourselves/ our reality.

 

I understand that Education is the fundamental aspect to this, as I am a witness of it myself. the more I educate myself about Reality with everything that is being presented as the Investigation of  Existence and this Reality through the Eqafe interviews, I become more certain about myself, my process, my understanding and playing my own ‘devil’s advocate’ to see where the hell there exist still any form of self interest to walk this process, which obviously cannot remain at all not a single iota of ‘convenience’ can determine my every move, otherwise it will be pointed out by myself in Self Honesty in order to realize that any form of Energy-seeking desire is Self-Dishonesty and that implies going to both the ‘good’ and the ‘bad’ as poles of the same energetic fix that the mind is always seeking for.

 

I commit myself to be absolutely self honest to any point of support that I commit myself to give to myself and share with others, in order to not create a certain persona of myself, standing up for ‘something good’ but simply realizing it is a single alignment and correction of how things should have always worked/ functioned in our reality. And this is then a matter of physical principles of living conditions, not of an egotistical approach to make ourselves feel ‘more’ than what we already are here.

 

I will continue  in the following posts debunking my acceptance of an elitist character within me, wanting to ‘do good’/ be good while still holding on mainly a personal self interest about it all to become ‘more’ than myself apparently.

 

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158. Special Care for Good People

Channelings, blessings and ‘extra care’ for chosen ones

Continuing from previous blog 157. Wishing Well as Self Interest

I briefly wrote about my beliefs within spirituality and people channeling ‘messages from ‘the afterlife’ which I absolutely believed were true do to the amount of information that these channelers and mediums (because they were apparently two different sides of the same coin) were giving, as well as the supposed ‘support’ we would get from these ‘white brotherhood,’ which just as anything within childhood created a great amount of questions that no one was able to answer to me, like WHY were we (family and myself among another few ‘privileged ones’)  the only ones receiving these ‘blessings’ and ‘extra support’ and not everyone in the world was aware of this seemingly ‘gift from above,’ such as all the nice words indicating ‘love’ and support for our financial troubles, personal woes and general health problems.  A child unconditionally takes in what the so-called authorities implant onto them, hence the acceptance of things like santa clause, the boogie man, the tooth fairy or god becomes a ‘usual thing’ with kids throughout their lives – I mean, how is it that we never in fact questioned these ‘cultural kicks’ to actually question how it is that one can implant such beliefs with no physical evidence of any of those being being real, or even worse, you as a parent making your child believe that they are getting these marvelous objects by the divine chosen ruffle that god has made in heaven, wherein you as a child, are suddenly born in a house with all the support and care you want, all the toys, all the fun and games while later on realizing that, oh oh, santa clause does not arrive to all kids, the tooth fairy leaves candy to some and money to others, even using scare tactics such as getting coal instead of toys if you are a ‘bad boy/girl’ – wow.

Then you have in spiritualism the belief of an afterlife that we had to aspire to through succumbing to worrying and asking for some external god to make us ‘get past the day’ every day. The pattern was clear even then: creating emotional dependency to actually continue supporting the cult of spirituality and plea for something ‘good’ and ‘better’ arriving to our lives. This was ‘the perfect plan’ that we accepted and allowed, wherein we never realized our physicality as equal and one, an instead remain in endless conflicts within struggles, trials and tribulations within the world system that WE also accepted and allowed ourselves to continue co-creating/ participating in.

 

And this is no different to any of us believing that somehow by ‘the magic word of god’ we could be supported to escalate our standard living – yes us and our ‘loved ones’ only, which was also part of the great conflict within me: why us? why was I able to get all these supposed blessings while I ‘knew’ that tons if not all people could benefit from such ‘blessings’ as well? If you reading this have a child, please read these words and don’t even  dare to speak of such nonsense like god, angels giving blessings, santa clause or the tooth fairy to your child – please, it really creates an inextricable dilemma within a child’s mind that adults can probably only laugh about, however living it out is a complete different story.

It is not ‘cool’ at all when you have the belief of these ‘invisible beings’ protecting you all the time – besides developing fear to ‘being watched/ observed by them all the time, one gets the impression that there must be something really ‘good’ and ‘special’ about me because these beings are taking care of ME me me and not anyone else. This was also a cause of conflict and separation wherein it seemed simply unjust to me that this ‘god’/ father/ creator whatever would only pick a few on Earth to ‘give unconditional support’ to, while the rest could remain in extreme poverty for the rest of their lives. Absolutely ludicrous

Now what? Well, this still exists in our current ‘civilization’ which I now see and understand how the sound of it always pops up in my mind as ‘see evil Eye/ I zation’ as the process of realizing how this current world system is the exact reflection of everything that we have become in fact when living by/ as the principles dictated within our minds, yes, the mind that can only think itself/ for itself/ by itself and that we have inadvertently hosted with our own flesh, giving away our entire lives to a limited framework of reality that we believed is ‘all we are,’ while neglecting the very life that is here, that we ‘know’ it’s here yet haven’t ever LIVED in reality, as we have all become sooo preoccupied to only better our current lives and financial situations, getting ourselves out of debt or getting even more money – or some extreme cases getting something to eat for the day – that no one has ever had enough time to consider our actual relationship with ourselves, each other and our reality.

 

Let’s Ask ourselves: How it is that even those with extreme amounts of money are also possessed and constantly preoccupied about money – and most likely also believing that there is some type of specialness toward them for having such ‘good fortune,’ mostly justifying it with saying ‘I am really blessed/ we are really thankful for the benevolence of our creator’ having no idea in fact how such good life and ‘specialized care’ in fact exists at the world-system level. 

 

No one is free until all is free and this practically implies realizing that our good-doer beliefs have ALSO become part of the jails that must be broken – why? because believing ourselves to be good and evil had lead us to believe that there was some type of ‘special reason’ for such polarity to exist within our world, while it was only a very basic mechanism existent within/ as the mind to keep generating energy  – you can read more about it in the post 129. Will Love and Lighters end up Killing People? to understand how love and light vs. evil and darkness have become the parody we have all arranged and followed to be a part of in order to condemn all that which we believe is negative and pursue the positive; within this, justifying imaginary forces/ gods/ spirits/ entities/ aliens that could somehow mean the ‘good’ in our reality and in that, creating a battle/ opposing/ bashing/ exterminating/ crucifying anything that can be labeled – by equal stance of brainwashing-  as bad/ negative/ evil/ satanic/immoral, instilling fears within human’s consciousness that we have believed ourselves to be till this day.

Who set the hierarchy? Who set the privileges? by accepting such point as money having any power over our reality – even before money as such existed but only existed as ‘power over others,’ we would comply to it as in there being a real.

If we remove the good and the bad – what remains? Physicality that has been already molded, shaped and in most of the cases abused in order to suit the human exigencies of good and bad. Now, this can be like a topic we’ve gone through plenty of times before, and we have in fact, however not from the perspective of how within the very acceptance of ‘good’ in our reality, we create the bad and in that, we are already being part of the necessary game wherein some ‘chosen ones’ become the ‘good/ benevolent’ ones, which are mostly and usually those that have enough money to not have to worry about ‘making a living,’ and yes, for all the ‘unfortunate ones,’ the usual ‘panacea’ is getting into some religion and replace the food on your table with ‘food for the soul’ through praying, chanting and wishing for ‘better times’ while repeating to yourself that everything will be al-right and that this has got to be ‘somehow’ some lesson to learn/ god’s plan that will magically turn out all fine in the end– nope, there’s nothing at all that can be corrected by magic spells from invisible beings –

This is so to then re-consider what we teach to our own children and how it is that within seemingly innocent points, we in fact create conflicts wherein the child is forced to BELIEVE and instill this form of thinking as a valid argument/ excuse to explain reality, relegating physical observation and experimentation to  a single method one learns in school as some type of ‘scientific stuff,’ instead of actually applying physical observation, experimentation and realizations as actual tools to get to know ourselves.

Yes, we have duped ourselves/ each other and that’s a constant within this current world system – are we willing to remain the same way as we do now? I don’t. I can’t, we can’t, we would deplete our entire planet if we continue this way – and once again ‘If you tolerate this, then you children will be next,’ and there’s no threat in that, it’s a fact.

Time to STOP religious and spiritual elitism and the implantation of beliefs about ‘benevolence’ existent only as self interest in our minds with no real action/ deeds that are in fact directed to ‘sweeten’ our ears with great promising futures that only be realized in fact if we dare to give such ‘divine benefits’ to all as equals – what? Yes, then there would be no Specialness but equalization of Life to ensure that there is no more delusional hierarchical ‘services’ at the expense of those deliberately left out of the ‘special ones’ –

This will certainly be Self-Forgiven, how else could we stand up from our own ignorance and deliberate neglect to believe that through thinking positive we could all benefit from ‘our creation’ and that those that suffer have no actual response as to why we have abandoned their situation as something we’d rather ‘not see’ within our ‘creative abilities’ of all the good, positive and fluffy experiences in “life”created only in our minds, while reality wails on an actual need that not many are willing to see, recognize as our responsibility and act upon it beginning with ourselves by Not tapping on to positive messages, spirituality or any other form of self abuse through ignorance.

 

Ask yourself: what will society be like once there are no more TV ‘blatantly rich’ and famous people all the time? What will children be and become once that any relationship with god disappears as the policeman in the head and what’s left is absolute self responsibility for ourselves as this physical world.

No more spiritual delusions of Grandeur, no more paranoia, no more justifying the lives of those that are part of the ‘contrast’ to a so-called benevolence/ goodness of man that is no where to be found, no more justified crimes against life in equality. Bingo: all win.

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155. Are we all Cannibals?

Redefining Consumerism as Self Support.

Within continuing looking at consumerism and the Frog Interviews, it is clear that the initial relationship we formed toward everything that is here, lead us to eventually having to consume ourselves in order to continue living – consuming ourselves? yes, we consume ourselves within the understanding that who and what we are as the substance within this physical existence is in fact  everything and all that we are and that which we use to sustain ourselves as physical bodies and, also as the mind that we fuel with our very own physical substance. For further explanations on this point, check out the Heaven’s Journey To Life blog.  We have been transforming this life substance and diminishing it to energy, to only being a temporary high in our minds to power up thoughts, emotions and feelings – thus, how to honor our living reality and physicality once that we discover that at the moment we’ll have to continue consuming food to exist?

 

I have walked through the point of judging having to eat and shit at the same time, consuming physicality and using it up to then dispose everything that I don’t require any longer within my physical body. Through understanding how the composition of my own physical body is the same as everything and everyone that is here – common sense – I got to see how it is in fact only the relationships that I have formed and created within my mind toward everything that I consume that which must be cleared up/aligned/ corrected  to in fact make of my own self-consumption a living-support, and not just feeding myself with food to sustain a physical body that would later on ‘empower’ my own mind as the ‘occupant’ within my body, depleting all the actual life-substance to power up thoughts, feelings and emotions as that point of separation we have existed as within our minds.

 

If cannibalism is seen as immoral in society, guess what? We’ve done this to ourselves through participating in our minds within believing ‘it is who we are.’

“Where I had within and throughout my Life, created who I am in my mind, and connected everything/everyone into and as my who I am in my Mind and so emerged into/as physicality reality through a Mind/as a Mind. Where, the processes of thinking/internal conversations emerged as how I would, within my Mind-Reality and the relationships I had formed within it – evolve it through thinking, and having internal conversations within myself and substantiate the Mind through/with energy/energy-experience as I make my internal alternate mind reality of actual physical reality ‘alive’. And so create an entire ILLUSION of what it means to live/be alive, not seeing, realising and understanding how for the Mind to exist, the Physical Body is sacrificed..” – Sunette Spies – Thought Designs – Part 2: DAY 154

 

 

We have All certainly participated in this by the mere fact of identifying and accepting ourselves to ‘be the mind’ and being literally ignorant about the actual functioning of the relationship between the physical and the mind, and about ourselves as the actual corporation/ consistency/ physicality of who and what we are really made of, which is ourselves as our physical body – wow, we have really Never in fact considered our entire physical body as the – derogatorily speaking – energetic source for our little bright mind to continue existing as this seemingly infinite resource to think, feel, imagine, wish, dream and hope all the time, which includes the points we’ve been looking at in terms of consuming/ buying/ possessing something or someone. And that is our real nature.

 

Within consuming – besides buying – we have the Eating consumption. And within this a way to practically walk this point of consuming/ consumerism at the moment within realizing that everything that we eat is ourselves, and everything that we have always consumed in any form/way is ourselves – this implies that our very own living-reality of consumption is based on us consuming ourselves. Now, this sounds really Not Cool I mean, all the time we thought we were in fact just ‘eating’ and that such action had no other meaning than sustaining the physical body – BUT! What we didn’t know, realize or understand is how the mind actually worked in relation to the physical body, and how everything that we ate would actually serve to sustain the very mind physical system that exists at an interdimensional level, sipping out the actual physical substance to transform into energy for its own survival – yep, a real parasite there and we are constantly feeding it – how? through participating in thoughts, emotions and feelings and any other type of mind-experience that we think is ‘us’ experiencing it, never really understanding what it in fact implies at the level of consciousness to be continuing creating relationships toward everything/ everyone in separation of ourselves through energy.

 

Thus, we have diminished the life substance that we consume to support ourselves to single batteries to power up the mind – the same way that we all have become single batteries to power up an entire world system of money. We see how we tend to judge ‘the world system’ in separation of ourselves, and how this actually leads us nowhere but further victimization instead of Self-Support with actual understanding through writing, applying Self-Forgiveness, Self Corrective Statements and Living it/ Applying it to in fact get to see how we have all been ‘unconditional’ participants to create the current world-system fuckup we exist as.

What does this practically mean? That we can begin considering the food we eat as an unconditional point of self support that we can in fact Use/support ourselves with to start living self-forgiveness beginning with the food that we eat.

 

 

As everything, we can redefine ‘consumerism’ as a derogatory term and instead see it as a physical function of taking in/eating/ingesting life to produce/support/give sustenance to ourselves As Life,  and that point of ‘producing/ supporting life’ is entirely up to us, to no longer use/ abuse food to feed our mind-cravings and mind needs, but instead assist and support our physical body in reality, the reality of what is required as nutrients which certainly is another aspect of education that must be investigated with our own physical bodies and proper medical diagnosis like blood samples, to see where and how we can practically nurture ourselves in an efficient manner, and not only following the desires, needs and wants of our mind, which is then already using the energy up to think about wanting/ needing/ and desiring, just like a never ending ouroboros to consume itself.

 

Thus through committing ourselves to Live and walk the Living Correction through Writing, Self Forgiveness, Self Corrective Statements and the Practical Application, we ensure that the nutrients we take in the form of food from/ of the Earth as the substance required to keep ourselves alive, are used to sustain ourselves during our Journey To Life, which means that it is to honor that which we take in as ‘food’ within the consideration that such nutrients and support for our body will in fact Not be used to power up our mind flicks and energetic manias, but instead support who we are as the realization of the relationship between the physical body and the mind, ensuring that through us stopping our participation in the mind within this Process; thus we use the nutrients to honor ourselves, honor life, because that’s certainly something that we were not taught to even consider within the foods that we eat, we simply learned that we give money for it and have ‘the right’ to consume it, that’s it.

 

So a practical point to consider whenever we are consuming foods, is to commit ourselves to realize that we are sustaining ourselves to LIVE in/as the Physical Body here breathing and providing the necessary nutrients to every physical component of our entire body, instead of feeding/ nurturing ourselves as our body to only power up the mind that sucks up such nutrients from our very tissue in order to continue the separation from ourselves as the physical body, externalizing this consumerism within the world system through money to ‘buy’ and ‘consume’ as a form of satisfying/ fulfilling/ creating a positive experience within ourselves As the Mind itself and so, becoming actually an eating-slave to power up the system that we have abdicated our living responsibility to.

 

This is a Vital point to understand, because it’s never been explained before how our thoughts are not ‘made up of stars’ as some innocent imaginary thing that has no consequence on the physicality that we are, no. They all Do have a consequence just as everything else that we participate in, and that’s our responsibility to get to know in detail about, as it is Our physical body and as such, our entire understanding of how this reality works so that we can in fact start getting a more in depth-view and understanding of this current world system being the direct outflow and manifestation of the very relationships that we are existing as within our physical body – you can begin with walking the Quantum Mind Series at Eqafe and get a hold of this in a step-by-step detailed explanation of what we are, how us participating in thoughts actually defines our entire relationship toward ourselves/ all in our reality, and also how to through becoming aware of this, commit ourselves to be the generation that stops accepting the mind as ‘normal,’ and also stopping any knowledge and information about how the physical body works that has been based on profit-making other than an actual support and assistance toward our quality living standards in our current society and reality.

 

We decide who and what we actually feed because we are the ones that decide in every moment whether we live or only delegate our beingness to a mind to do the pseudo-living for us through thinking reality, instead of living it.

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154. The Ladder of Success is Self Abuse

Consumerism is Self-Consumption

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge the belief that buying is a pleasant experience and a hobby, wherein one learn to see the act of consuming as a a fulfilling experience that satisfies and quenches that seemingly constant ‘void’ that is perceived when there is no energetic experience going on within us, which is how we have defined energy as Living instead of understanding how it is that these energetic experiences in fact lead us to our very own depletion/consumption and eventual death, as all energy implies the consumption of the physical, the burning of the fuel that is the physical in order to create what we only see as a ‘fulfilling/ pleasant/ satisfying experience,’ because no one on Earth had even known how it is that this process of Thinking actually goes through, and it is now that we have the information through the material available at Eqafe such as the Quantum Mind Series that we are able to understand how everything that we have ever thought is implying a form of abuse toward ourselves as the physicality that we really are, all in the name of an experience that only goes up in the mind, without no apparent further consequence other than a momentary high which is what we have in fact become addicted to: Energy as a make-believe ‘living experience’ while ignoring the actual gruesome reality that goes behind every single thought that we participate on, which implies our own self-consumption.

This is the point that we had not realized when labeling ‘consumerism as a pleasant experience’ and not seeing/ realizing and understanding How such pleasant experience is created and what is actually enabling this experience, which is and can only exist if ‘something else gives It/ provides it which in this case is the physical that is literally ‘nailed’ just like Jesus on the cross in order to give that ‘kingdom of god’ that we have foolishly defined as money, wealth and the experience that we have defined through/as money as happiness, fulfillment, power, satisfaction as the saturation of energy that we have foolishly ‘bought’ to be ‘real’ in any way, because we have ignored our own physicality as the actual equality and oneness as life, as the actual source of that experience that we believe is ‘who we are,’ due to not seeing, realizing and understanding how the mind works in relation to the physical body and how it runs like an engine gnawing our very own physical tissue to keep its energetic functions going – all of this is explained in the Frog Series that I suggest listening to in order to understand consumerism as a point of self abuse and how we have the actual capacity to correct this points within a new system like the Equal Money System beginning with Ourselves as that equal and one relationship developed within our mind toward the physical.

 

When and as I see myself participating in the thought of ‘Buying is a Pleasant experience’ and projecting this judgment upon others to see them as ‘ignorant,’ I stop and I breathe – I realize that I have been absolutely ignorant to the actual understanding of how all ‘Positive Experiences’ are created at the expense of the physical which is the sacrificial rite that we do on a daily basis whenever we think and only follow our own personal benefit/ happiness point, while believing that we are enhancing our ‘living experience’ and ‘evolution’ in ourselves, without understanding how we are actually sacrificing our own flesh and living substance due to the accepted and allowed belief that thinking, having feelings and emotions is something ‘natural’ to the human being.

We have been oblivious to what extent we have abused ourselves/ all that is here whenever we simply consider it was very easy to follow energy as ‘living,’ which is the necessary education that must be taken on in our reality so that we can in fact, at last, understand that this current system of consumerism based on linking consuming/ buying to a positive experience is an evidently unsustainable system, wherein we only see the ‘nice’ and ‘positive’ and ‘attractive’ points as the final product made for our own benefit, while neglecting the actual gruesome reality that goes behind the entire production process and extraction of prime matter – nice way to name the Earth’s resources – in order to transform it/ configure it in a way that we impose our wants, needs and desires toward this satisfaction/ fulfilling point as a positive experience that we have believed is ‘all that we are here for in our lives,’ while missing out every moment of actual living here in Equality and Oneness as the physical, as Breath, simply because we trained/educated ourselves to only regard Energy as Living.

And this you can understand in the series the Crucifixion of Jesus in the chapter number 7 that speaks about this ‘Ladder of Success’

 

I commit myself to stop judging and within this reinforcing the same mechanisms of separation that we have participated in, which implies using our minds to assess/ value/ define this physical reality in terms and way that we benefit ourselves from, due to the premise of accepting life as an energetic experience –thus it is to educate myself to ensure that I am aware of how it is that I have become what we can see in each one of ourselves and this world in its entirety as the outflow and consequence of our own accepted and allowed perception of life being an energetic experience that is either positive or negative, and within this, exposing how it is that our own wants, needs and desires became manifested as every single product that we are able to BUY now with money that is not readily available/ given to all unconditionally, which is indicating how we have separated ourselves from our very own physicality as this entire world through a belief system in our minds, that sustains our entire economical model at the moment – this is no different to the thinking pattern of believing that buying/ consuming a single thing to own/ possess/ eat/ wear/ use is what ‘living’ is about (which is how we have defined living as an experience) wherein we diminish ourselves to being only ‘thinking’ instead of breathing and understanding the physicality as who we really are and how we consume it while thinking/ following our thoughts.

 

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when entering a mall/ commercial center/ market, and seeing all the plethora of things there are to buy and its wide variety, I get the pictures of the media and how they present similar products wherein then I access a thinking-pattern to blame the media for ‘brainwashing us,’ without realizing how there is Nothing in this world that was made ‘by the hand of a god,’ we are all responsible for it and that implies that we created the media in order to constantly create new needs/ desires within people in order to fulfill and satisfy the exigencies that we’ve established as a monetary system that requires constant consumption to continue going, which is very clear how our current system is energy-driven as an abusive relationship upon the physical, instead of having created and established and agreed upon a world system wherein we can support one another as equals, standings As the equality and oneness that we in fact are, but that we didn’t do because we accepted the mind to be the one that dictates ourselves in relationships of separation toward everything and all that is here, which is why and how Media is so effective, as it presents a relationship of separation creating a desire/ want/ need in terms of buying/ consuming products in the name of getting a positive experience out of it, and us accepting that as ‘Real’ and ‘True’ because of our own accepted and allowed separation from this physical reality through an energetic experience created in our minds toward that point that we then call our ‘desire/ want/ need’

This implies that all we are currently following is our own self interest, without understanding how such cultivation of personal-needs/ special needs are only existent for those that have money and that form part of the ‘active participants in society’ wherein money has defined who is valuable to the system to perpetuate its functioning and who’s not, thus using Media to create an incentive for ourselves to enter the ‘realm of happiness’/ become part of the Elite where money buys the smiles and fulfillment, using money that is also a belief system of abuse due to it being created only out of thin air with its main purpose being the control and centralization of power for a few, while entertaining ‘the masses’ to contribute to this through entertainment/ media in order to continually go seeking for theses positive experiences that are linked to the ideal image/ presentation of successful living  of those that sit in the royal chairs of ‘power and control’ within the same configured system of ‘power’ = ‘money,’ which is actually only a make-believe system, hence: NO power is real, no money is Real but what is Real is the abuse that we inflict upon ourselves every time that we diminish ourselves to Believing that such money is in fact ‘powerful’ and that owning/ possessing something/ someone is in fact making ourselves ‘more’ than who we already here – this happening every time that we follow a single desire to acquire, buy and consume in means of personal satisfaction and fulfillment.

 

When and as I see myself wanting to blame something or someone for the current state of reality we’re living in, in separation of myself – I stop and I breathe – I realize that we are ‘specialists’ in projecting blame toward others for being ‘the villain’ and ‘the bad guydoing this to ourselves, without understanding how it is that we created our own reasons and justifications to perpetuate a system wherein self interest is the main cultivated aspect of ‘who we are’ as human beings, wherein everything that we have created and configured as our world system – money, policies, economy, education, religions, leisure, science, technology – is directed to benefit and please only a fraction of the population that have enough money to really have a good life, which is the main primary point that is promoted through media/ ads everywhere, infiltrating what’s cunningly called ‘public opinion’ to create a commonly accepted ‘standard living’ in society based Not on a common well being and direct understanding and interaction with nature/ the Earth, the animal kingdom as part of ‘who we are,’ but instead diminished everything to only being a consuming-aspect to keep up the ‘satisfaction’ experience within ourselves as our mind which must be understood as the very mechanism of self-depletion that we run on a daily basis, being the relationship of who we are as the mind toward the physical the actual point to investigate  and learn about, to understand How we have made of consumption to sustain our physicality an entire mind-created experience linked to getting ‘the most of it all’ and defining such point of abuse as ‘power’ without understanding a thing about the current monetary system wherein such power can in fact only stem from the abuse inflicted to all of the Earth’s resources, animal kingdom, humanity as well in order to ‘keep running’ this entire machinery that we have called a ‘living system,’ which is in fact not at all so, because we have not  yet established our individual understanding of equality and oneness as this physical reality which is then why and how

I commit myself to support myself to continue understanding who I am in relation to the world system, how my very own thoughts/ participation in emotions and feelings and defining this entire reality according to a value-system wherein the monetary system I have believed to have any ‘solid foundation’ is in fact determining my own relationship to other beings, things and the world in itself, due to us having accepted and allowed ourselves to diminish who we are to a set of predefined, predetermined, finite relationships based on energetic experiences such as power, success, happiness through consumption which must be first of all understood as the relationship that we have created within ourselves toward our own mind in separation of the physicality that we are, which is the first step to consider if we see and realize how our own system is flawed from the very beginning of its creation, and our existence as a whole, because we separated ourselves from each other and developing relationships toward one another and giving it a value, which is the premise that lead us to currently desire, want and need such experience of ‘reuniting’ as a possession/ consumption point instead of an equal and one relationship and understanding of who we are as equal and one to that point of desire, want and need.

 

Walk with us in our Journey To Life and to establish a living-common-sense in our reality through a Monetary Reform that that we can All participate in through democratic means, simply by externalizing our awareness of how this entire world system is a scam that we have all been participants of and within that, taking responsibility for the consequences we’ve created through establishing a life-considerate system as the Equal Money System, so that we can re-establish our relationships to ourselves, the world/ each other in Equality and no more create belief systems of ‘power’ and ‘success’ only through accepting life being limited to a single energetic experience that can only exist through the abuse of the physical through the mind.

Time to Wake the fuck up!

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153. Life is Beautiful when You Got Money

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create an experience toward people walking in a mall wherein everyone seemed to be very busy and ‘happy’ in consumerism, wherein I realized that I was also becoming a character wanting to deliberately give a message with my physical movements and gestures of ‘you are all deluded,’ without realizing that such people and what they are doing is no different to what I used to do in the past, with my very own consumerist fixations while being high on the rush of ‘we have money, let’s buy the stuff that I want.’

When and as I see myself creating a deliberate stance of superiority based on diminishing all people in a mall as ‘brainless consumerist drones’ – I stop and I breathe – I realize that I am becoming only a character that is judging and opposing beings based on ‘who I am’ in my  mind/ ego/ past in such moment instead of being here unconditionally as breath, not determining who I am according to a building/ people/ environment where things are bought and sold.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think that ‘Life is beautiful when you got money’ as a way to create an experience of superiority upon others when seeing myself coexisting within an environment where the world seems to be reduced to endless rows of shops and people consuming/ buying as if that is what ‘having fun’ is supposed to be about. I realize that this is me judging a single building, with stores where people buy and sell stuff that they can afford with money or not. And that is just how we have created and fabricated our current reality and within this, there is no point to judge other than seeing how a point like a mall exists within the context of our entire current world system, wherein money defines who is able to have such type of entertainment/ fun through buying/ consuming along with others on a Friday afternoon. 

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to pace myself around the mall, waiting for the rain to stop and wanting to present myself deliberately as someone that is Not there as ‘part of the whole consumerist/buying thing’ but out of going there for a sheer necessity in the moment, which is obviously linked to buying something as well – thus  I realize how I am only judging that which I obviously do in my every day living which is buying to consume and live, buying things that we eventually require as secondary points in our lives – and I see that I have judged this point of buying based on the amount of money that one has, wherein if I see myself having little to no money, the experience of separation toward people with lots of money is exacerbated as an inferiority that is transformed into contempt and general judgment toward ‘their lifestyles;’ and when I ever saw myself having sufficient money I could then create this experience of  ‘superiority’ based on me assessing being standing on an ‘equal-stance’ toward people that had money to buy and within this, creating this positive experience as well within me when going shopping/ buying as part of what I was taught should be our ‘fun time’ as family – for example – a decade ago.

 

When and as I see myself creating a general experience of criticism toward a particular environment wherein wealth/ money is all around and wanting to become the point that is there trying to ‘make a point’ of it all being just bullshit through how I behave and move myself around, I stop and I breathe.  I realize that we are all equally subsumed in this world system wherein buying/ consuming is part of our day to day living due to how we have condemned/ enslaved ourselves to only be able to eat, wear clothes, have proper services if we have enough money to buy it all. Thus

 

I commit myself to establish the Equal Money System to ensure that buying is no longer only a ‘positive experience’ linked to ‘having enough money’ to eat, buy and ‘have fun’ through buying secondary needs/ necessities, as I see and realize how we have created these labels onto stuff based on the amount of money as a price tag that we have imposed onto reality – thus there will be no more points of ‘luxury’ and ‘second needs’ but an actual informed decision to – first of all – produce that which is actually necessary and also cool to support our day to day living, and from there consumerism in itself will stop being ‘consumerism’ as a derogative term that it has become now within our current culture of money as positive experience – and instead, will become the single transaction of equal-money to get that which we require to live – being it first/ basic needs or that which we can call at the moment secondary needs, which will exist as products/ services that are in accordance to a genuine living-expression, which is the basic principle upon which products and services will exist in the Equal Money System.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge all things in stores as pretentious bullshit and unnecessary variety, without realizing how I have been part of this world and accepted this desire to be unique, special, original as well, which is the origin point of how all that which we consume is extrapolated to ‘the most special/ the greatest/ the most original’ item that is promoted in such ways in order to make money out of it, which is what we have enslaved ourselves to: a monetary system that requires to create ‘new needs’ in order to continue buying/ consuming and as such maintaining the flow of money as a currency/ current that is based upon abuse of this physical reality for our own benefit and pleasure.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from any being there by silently judging them as ‘oblivious to reality’ due to being there, having money to buy and ‘have fun,’ which can only exist if I have judged money, buying, fun according to knowledge and information of how there are ‘billions of people that can’t experience the shopping-high’ without realizing that in such moment of me judging the whole event and moment is doing nothing at all to solve the problem that money as a disparity in living conditions have created in our world, due to our own accepted and allowed separation from what is here through money, creating an entire value-system/ scheme to categorize people according to the amount of money they have/ don’t have – and accordingly, ‘live’ a life of happiness and satisfaction when there’s more than enough money to buy or the inequality existent as poverty when having no money to buy and sustain themselves properly

 

When and as I see myself judging people that have money as oblivious to reality because of the security that money represents, I stop and I breathe – I realize that judging does nothing but adding up to the separation from the physical reality that we have abused because of another mind-created desire to ‘be more’ which is what I become in my mind when creating an authority of ‘judging people with money’ in a superior mode, without realizing that we are ALL equally participants and creators of All that exist, and that it is then to stop all judgments and walk in the physical no matter what the scenario is, no matter what ‘types of people’ are around, as I see and realize that all these variations and definitions toward a physical environment/ people are based on the effect that we have all duped ourselves with as money, which enables to create either a better picture presentation from/ of our reality or not.

Thus it is to see how the moment that we judge something that is ‘over the top’ from the social standard of ‘normal living’ and existing in/as an excess of wealth is simply something useless to do, as it is not to judge reality, but understand what are the actual origins that lead to the creation of such places and forms of ‘living’ as humans, wherein we have separated ourselves from the physical-cycles of life and artificialized it into a system that is sustainable only according to rules and regulations that we are currently existing as our capitalist system.

I commit myself thus to within stopping judging reality, simply observe what is here and without ‘backchat’ instead take note of the points that I observe in order to realize how we are all creators of such points, what deficiencies exist within the entire system to enable polarized versions of reality to the extent where some live in the utmost wealth and opulence while other live in the worst poverty and starvation that is possible to ‘exist as’ within this world – how we have all agreed to continue living in a system wherein life is not equally valued, but only reduced to a consuming system that is available for some only, while the Earth is giving all that is here without a single ‘bill’ to be paid for.

 

This is how I assist and support myself to transform any judgment toward the world system and reality to take it back to self and see where and how we have all created, accepted and allowed the current system to move/ exist as it does now, and within this also at an individual level identify how such judgments can only exist if I had formed a previous relationship to such – in this case – wealth, money and ability to buy everything that I could possibly want, which has obviously existed within me in my past wherein I also learned that shopping and consuming is a  positive experience and a ‘must do’ when one has more than enough money to live.

There’s multiple aspects and dimensions of judging a point that we see ourselves being ‘vexed’/ bothered by, which can  only exist if we have created a relationship of separation toward it, that’s why and how we see ourselves often judging everything and everyone in our world, because everything that we have become is that: separation. And as long as we continue accepting such judgment as a way to cover up the responsibility we hold toward the creation of this entire system, we’ll remain as judgmental victims of our own self-created hell, and I am not willing to continue diminishing ourselves to being ‘only that.’

Thus I commit myself to take responsibility for myself, my actions, words and attitudes, being very aware of how I present myself in any given place/ situation and not ‘adapt’ myself to create any point of resistance or physical judgmental behavior toward that which I perceive as living in the saying ‘Ignorance is bliss,’ as all we had lived as and by as humans is just that, we’re barely beginning to wake up and open our eyes to the extent of abuse that we have imposed onto ourselves and all living beings, just because of seeking this point of happiness.

There’s more to look at here, definitely.

Join us in our Journey to Life to take responsibility for ourselves, our world and reality and support each other the way that it always should have been from the beginning of who we are as existence.

 

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The fall of the currency - Equal Money System

Equal Money System

Economist’s Journey To Life 

 

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Thought Designs – Part 1: DAY 153

DAY 153: After Death Communication – Part 3

 

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Recommended Education about the World System of Money and the relationship to ourselves as the Mind and the Physical Reality:

 

Consumerism explained in this series:

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145. Possessed by my Possessions

Continuing from 144. Obsessive and Possessive Patterns: My belongings 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to picture ‘my suitcase’ filled with al ‘my belongings’ getting lost and going into fear, wherein the most prominent thought is ‘I will have to buy everything again’ which is that one point defines an actual fact of ‘losing something’ according to losing money through losing the stuff that I’ve bought with money.

When and as I see myself fearing losing money as ‘losing my belongings,’ I stop and I breathe – I realize that yes I may have to get things again if something gets lost and is indispensable to live, however it is not create an entire point of possession when losing something. I can instead realize how it doesn’t matter if I ‘lose it all,’as it is to realize that I never in fact ‘owned’ anything as who I am in fact cannot be lost.

I realized that everything that I have believed myself to be in relation to ‘my belongings’ and calling stuff ‘my belongings’ is part of the personal brainwash wherein through money we’ve acquired things that we have defined as ‘our property’ – even sometimes becoming possessed by them – instead of realizing that in equality and oneness as everything that is here, there can exist no ‘real ownership’ in any way whatsoever. How can there be if we cannot even be aware of ourselves as our own physical body and actually BE in it/ as it, we only use it as a way to continue creating ideas beliefs and perceptions of who we are as our thoughts, as our belongings, as ‘that which we own,’ which is the thinking-pattern that I have accepted and allowed myself to be and become when accepting the ‘who I am’ in relation to money in a world where life and everything that is of the Earth has been given a numerical value as a ‘price’ that defines the amount of money that we require to have to ‘own it’ because we haven’t simply decided to create a system wherein we can give to each other that which we require to live unconditionally. It is really a matter of deciding to do so.

I commit myself to at all times realize how it is only through the premise and existence of money-consciousness as ‘value’ over life that I can perceive a sense of ‘loss’ and ‘lack’ toward something/ someone in my reality. Thus it is to realize how I can in fact walk this process to equalize myself as my mind, my physical body and the thoughts that I use to define ‘who I am’ to ensure that I no longer ‘think’ of something as a point of property or ownership, but instead realize that it belongs to HERE and is available  for everyone – it is in fact ourselves that must ensure we create a physical system to support all beings Equally, just the way proposed in the Equal Money System which begins at a thought level of how we relate ourselves to the physical reality, ensuring that we do not view ‘who we are’ according to the amount of money we have/ don’t have and the stuff that we buy with it.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge someone as ‘careless’ because of presenting little to no attachment to things as ‘belongings.’ I see and realize that worrying and being concerned about ‘losing stuff’ is a point that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist as/ be brainwashed with in a continual ‘fear of loss’ in relation to  ‘who I am’ when it comes to ‘my belongings’ as a point of constant possession, instead of realizing that I can in fact use what is here, what I currently have at my disposition to support myself to live, but at all times realizing that I cannot possibly ‘own’ it, as property is in fact a delusion backed by our current capitalist system as our ‘thought-making doctrine’ that we believe is ‘who we are,’ wherein we have given value to everything and everyone in separation of ourselves as one and equal as Life.

When and as I see myself judging someone as ‘careless’ for not ‘caring’ about ‘losing stuff, I stop and I breathe – I realize that I was taught to always ‘be careful with my money/ save it/ keep it/ not squander it’ which became a constant fear-reminder to see money as something ‘superior’ to me, wherein the loss of it would mean ‘being scolded for losing money/ wasting money’ without realizing that money in fact is just paper and coins that we have elevated to a godly status, missing out the entire reality of who we really are as life, as everything that is here that is actually being depleted/ lost because of us using and existing within/as a monetary system that functions according to the utmost exploitation of the Earth’s resources to build our happy-go-lucky lives of buying, consuming, repeating  until we are ‘satisfied’ about having ‘all the money we can’ and equate that to being ‘happy successful’ and ‘satisfied’ – thus

I commit myself to realize at all times that creating an experience upon ‘losing’ something is an actual product of my own brainwashing in relation to the value of money as the thing that ‘I buy my belongings with,’ which I have judged as a ‘separate point’ and in fact, perceived as ‘my happiness/ my satisfaction’ in separation of myself.

I realize that in my mind to disguise the actual ‘specialness’ I had created toward money, I gave ‘more value’ to the actual ‘things’ as belongings, which reveals how it is that we can deceive ourselves to separate money as the bills and coins from the actual ‘stuff’ that we bought with money as ‘belongings,’ as if money in itself was just a  ‘nasty powerful thing’ yet when transformed into an ability to possess/ own something, it suddenly becomes ‘alright’ because we’ve made it ‘alright’ to believe we can in fact own something. This is creating yet another value-system upon things besides the original delusion as money-consciousness having any real value in itself upon life.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to ever judge myself for ‘not caring about what I have’ wherein I was then taught to ‘actually care’ because ‘money had been spent on me/ the things I own and use,’ which then became my way of thinking as the acquired conception of money as something that I had to regard as ‘separate’ and ‘special’ within the confines of my mind and the value imprinted onto things I own, used, the food I ate, the clothes I wore, the materials I worked with, making of money this ‘one thing’ that I would create a separate bubble of concern for and utmost care due to how I believed that money was in fact something ‘important’ to take care of, without ever asking how this money came to be, why it is that money is being used to abuse each other/ the Earth and the animal kingdom or how it is that money can exist as debt.

When and as I see myself believing that ‘I must care about money’ I stop and I breathe – I realize that money is currently the key to keep supporting ourselves to live and how it is that we must work currently in order to live – however, it is not to dismiss the fact that it is only a means to get the points we require to live and that in no way can we continue regarding it as a separate superior point to ourselves, as that would be then the point of abuse that we ‘hold on to’ and as such, tampering our ability to equalize ourselves as life.

I commit myself to care about money within the consideration of it being a tool to survive at the moment – however I also commit myself to walk the process of redefining money as a tool to administrate the Earth’s resources and make them available to all beings equally as it always should have been.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Not realize how I have used money as a way to lie and deceive myself and others to believe that because I have money, I have the right to ‘own’ something because ‘I bought it with MY money,’ which is no different to believing in a god/holy spirit/superior force endowing me with this magnificent ‘power’ to ‘own’ something/ someone – thus

When and as I see myself believing that I can in fact ‘own’ something – I stop and I breathe – I remind myself of the joke that the holy-spirit and god endowing powers imply as an equivalent to the belief of me being able to ‘own something,’ as this is a quick an effective way to debunk any special regard I had kept toward money as an actual ‘power’ to ‘get what I want,’ which is then a point wherein I can instead, check my point of self interest/ self definition instead of holding something as ‘important’ in my mind without any awareness of what it is that I am in fact being possessed by in a single moment, which in such events, it is only being possessed by the holy-money-consciousness concept of money that is used to abuse life in a self-righteous mode.

I commit myself to redefine money as a current practical tool that I use in order to be able to support myself to survive and direct it to continue supporting myself/others to actually step out of our delusional money-trap as an enslavement system and in fact, destine money to implement the ultimate solution that will Ensure Life is Equalized at last in all ways, wherein money then will have no ‘meaning’ other than a counting tool to administrate the Earth’s resources in a way that is best for all life.

I realize that it is through me stopping and correcting the relationship I have held toward money that I begin the actual living of Equal-money as myself, wherein I no longer hold any ‘special value’ upon everything that is Here as Life, as I can then realize myself as being one and equal to it all as well.

 

This places things into perspective and realize how we have defined ‘our belongings/ possessions’ as things we have acquired with money that exists in a monetary system wherein Life is not considered at all.

Thus it is to realize who we are toward money as a thought in our minds that exists as the premise and accepted ‘value over life,’ which is unacceptable. Thus, what we have to redefine is our relationship toward money, our relationship toward ourselves as the thoughts that have accepted and allowed ourselves to exist within/ as a system of ‘values’ in separation of life.
I realize that everything that we have become as our current monetary system began with a thought, a thinking pattern of wanting to ‘own’ something, have ‘power’ over others, wanting to earn, have, use and even abuse for our own benefit and satisfaction as a delusion of possibly being able to be ‘more’ than who and what we already are.

 

The question here to ask ourselves is: have we ever then lived according to the physical realization of equality as life? No, we haven’t. Hence the Equal Money System exists as the realization and practical implementation of life as the one and only value on Earth, using Money as a simple tool that will allow us to learn how to live as equals, how to give to each other what we want for ourselves and as such, stop living in fear of loss, stop living being possessed by our possessions. I realize that who I am cannot be reduced to having/owning something, as this is in fact the ‘flawed’ association to equalize: we cannot own something, we can only use it to support ourselves to live. I realize that to be and become possessed by ‘wealth’/ money is the same as being possessed by a holy spirit believing ourselves to be ‘powerful’ in fact. We are not, we have only abused life through our current conception of money – thus it is time to stop.

I commit myself to stop brainwashing children about money being ‘the point of power to save’ as this is in fact the actual thought accepted and allowed as ‘real’ that determined my entire relationship toward money as something ‘superior’ to myself, something that I had to regard as ‘important,’ within the belief that it is what would allow me to OWN things – so is this the power of the NOW?

 

THE NWO is the Equal Money System.

Join us in our dedication to Equalize Life in this world for once and for ALL.

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135. ‘The Secret’ CULTivates Narcissists

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to accept the pursuit of happiness as a normal human being’s purpose in life wherein one’s empowerment as money – more than the necessary one enabling relationships, properties, top executive jobs and all sorts of benefits in society – is actually revered and venerated as if it was an actual God that we are praying to and praising, making of money our god – yet we disguise this blatant cult with words like success, fame, fortune, dream life and roles/conditions within society such as nobility, royalty, presidency, top sports players, magnates, riches and ‘influential people’ that can only exist in such titles as an example for billions of human beings that seek to be in such a position as well, without realizing how ludicrous it would be to in fact sustain a life of ‘the rich and famous’ for 7 billion human beings.

Thus, I realize that what is required is an actual wake up call to expose how such ideal ‘happiness’ and ‘well being’ based on the standards of what a rich/ famous person is, is in fact unsustainable and the actual glorification of abuse, as if we were able to in one single moment become aware of how many people have suffered, been killed, abused, chronically suffered through the creation, manufacturing and production of our entire ‘civilization,’ we would probably start regarding wealth and fortune as an actual point of abuse instead of blindly and foolishly praising it in separation of ourselves as life.

When and as I see myself wandering off to the life of the rich and the famous and start wondering how ‘great’ it would be to have all that money – I stop and I breathe – I realize that such images and stories of having all the money are actually systematically conveniently propagated and are specific/ strategic ways to imprint desires, wants and needs within regular slaves/human beings so that we continue working ‘as much as possible’ to someday eventually (in our dreams only) get to such a position of power and fame, glory as all the money that we believe is the actual point of ‘happiness’ in our world.

I commit myself to expose how the lives of the rich and famous are actual strategic points of propaganda to keep capitalism and our current life-style of seeking fame, fortune and glory in place as the ultimate bliss, which is then recognizing the point of abuse it represents to present a life that is in no way LIVING but only consumerism equated to fulfillment unattainable by all human beings equally and that it is thus in fact an insult to present such outrageous fortune while blindly believing that all beings can ‘climb the ladder of success’ toward such fame and fortune within the current monetary system.

I see and realize that it is only through looking at the ‘reality’ of our desires, wants and needs that we become aware of how we have participated in creating desires, wants and needs that in no way represent an actual Living Condition that Supports Life/ living, but that are only make-believe realities as the products and activities that are related to us aspiring to be and become part of ‘the elite’ that we see on TV, that we see on magazines and that we are enthralled with within our current societies wherein media is telling us what to do, what to eat, what to wear, who we should date, what to vote for, what to diss, what to suppress, what to embody, what to think and what Not to think through imprinting fear toward the most basic questions that every human being should ask themselves, such as HOW it is that we have created the current monetary system as a god that is not readily available for all to dignify all beings’ lives?

 

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to never question the seeKing and Chase-ing of positivity in this world as a point of abuse, due to it being perfectly ‘normal’ for any being to seek self’s own ‘well being’ through asking to an energy/god/saint/the universe for that which could mean happiness/ joy point, which is actually using money as a point of abuse to acquire yet another point that can only be conceded/ given if it is taken from others in fact, which is how the Law of Attraction actually works like.

I realize that the sheer acceptance of only a fraction of human beings existing in this acceptance of their ‘pursuit of happiness’ as an actual living-purpose is what must be exposed as the popular accepted and allowed abuse within humanity, as this is the way that we have made of narcissism an apparent disorder that can be named individual self interest due to the extreme care for one’s own well-being actually existing as a  ‘normal thing,’ in our society, being entertained with all things positive that one can consume in order to ‘feel great’ while 3/4 of the Earth starve to death every single day.

When and as I see myself accepting positivity and positive thinking as a ‘normal thing’ in our reality wherein it’s seen as ‘something ordinary’ that people want to succeed in what they do and what they dedicate their lives to – I stop and I breathe –  I bring myself here to realize that such attitude is actually the building blocks of a delusional world system, wherein any positive experience cannot exist without abusing thousands of beings, which includes everything that we virtually have as a commodity in this world system at the moment, simply because we have not yet become an actual living being that cares for life in equality, but only seeks one’s own benefit at all times, regardless of who has to suffer the consequences.

Thus, I commit myself to expose positivity as an actual abusive thinking pattern that has been blindly accepted, followed and bought within society because of the amount of money it also produces for the world system – thus it is to expose what a closed system of wealth it represents when only a few can aspire to get to/ obtain such point of success wherein education, money, and having at least a middle-class position is what enables you to seek after things like ‘The Secret’ and any other wishful positive thinking, without considering how everything that one asks is in fact manufactured, produced, distributed and sold within a world system wherein Money in itself as the current monetary system is the actual structure of abuse of which there cannot be in any way a possibility to ‘succeed’ without abusing others.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to accept the ultimate self-importance and individualism as an actual ‘self-care’ wherein in fact I only cared about ME-me-me and my position within this world system being secured through money as long as My-Needs are fulfilled, without realizing how this apparent ‘self-improvement’ of the individual through wishful thinking, positive attitude and a ‘clear vision to the future’ is nothing but white-light rubbish as words that rub the ego the right way in order to create an imaginary sense of well being, wherein the very backchat/ thoughts in the head as internal conversations become also part of the character that sustains this positive-beingness of only seeking to get the rewards, only seeking to be granted with ‘the most cake,’ granted with the ‘most important position’ in a job, granted with all the money in the world with which we can ‘make our dreams come true,’ never questioning how this ‘may your dreams come true’ attitude represents doing just that: manifesting an imaginary dimension of our minds, using an also imaginary point like money to in fact create a righteous ‘right’ to use the resources of the earth, the people and the entire structure in order to Only satisfy ourselves –

I realize that this makes us ALL Equally Responsible for what is existent in this world, just by the fact that we have all sometime wished something ‘good’ for ourselves while neglecting the rest of the world and its actual situation of absolute lack, famine, violence, abuse and extortion that reality is currently existing as, wherein money became our security veil that will certainly not be sustainable for a long time now.

I commit myself to expose self-improvement as the search for success, positive thinking and positive attitude as the most EVIL tools ever provided to humanity further separate ourselves from one another, creating the ultimate competition to get the jackpot within following ‘The Secret’ that we foolishly accepted as ‘real’ without pondering how it is that people in the Elite would actually allow this point to come-through with such as if it was in any way real – Thus, it is to expose this ‘get rich quick’ lifestyle propaganda as the totalitarianism propaganda hitting human’s buttons that read ‘searching for happiness,’ in order to accept the current monetary system wherein ‘all dreams can come true’ through maintaining and sustaining a system of abuse such as capitalism, wherein the platform to only support/ grant such ‘big prize’ is available for a few only, which means that The Secret as the Law of Attraction is in fact like a light that attracts the moths to their death, as there is no way in which such happiness as ‘all the money, fame, glory’ is able to exist for all within the current configuration of the world-system as money – yet there is another way

The solution stands clear: we must create a world-system wherein Everyone’s Lives can be in fact glorified, dignified and enjoyed through a monetary system that ensures the access to the Earth’s unconditional resources in an equal manner, as that is the actual way in which True Happiness can emerge in this world, where all men regard each other as equals, wherein all beings can finally live and experience the ever longed-for Heaven on Earth that has been broadly promoted, while it is the ultimate Scam in religious and New Age movements with the infamous name of ‘ascension,’ without realizing that such Heaven is no more and that all that is Left is Life on Earth to be equalized through an actual political and economical reform, wherein all that is here of the Earth is given and distributed equally to all beings in it.

 

This is then the real Law of our Being that must be realized and understood as the Only way in which Our lives can continue existing – thus it is to transform that selfish narcissistic Self-Care/ Self-Importance to an actual SELF that considers/ regards all beings as one and equal.

I commit myself to be the example of how Life can only thrive if living in Equality beginning with ourselves

Be One Vote for World Equality – No More Secrets!

Equal Money System 

 

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97. Words as Elitism

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to value the way words can be arranged to express as ‘more’ or ‘less’ than myself according to aesthetic values according to how many evocations do I get when reading words, wherein I became used to valuing words as ‘special’ and ‘unique’ according to the type of pictures and experiences I was able to create within myself when reading them, within this using words in self-interest only, seeking to satisfy a aesthetical aspect of communication wherein no living principle was existent, but only using words as a means to entertain myself and get a sense of pleasure from reading what I defined as ‘well-written expression,’ never ever considering how words themselves were already an imposition upon life and that with me creating an experience of language and the written word itself, I separated myself even further from the words as myself through creating experiences through words, wherein words then became the way for me to live through the words/ eyes of others as authors, just because I was not willing to live my own life and as such, becoming a book worm wherein I knew that I would not have to face the world and create relationships with other human beings, but create my own ‘living’ through reading stories to entertain myself with, forgetting about reality in its totality in a deliberate manner.

 

I forgive myself that I ever accepted and allowed myself to praise literature as something ‘magnificent’ just because of the experiences I was able to obtain from words in my mind, without realizing that in no way has any book supported humanity to actually start taking into consideration how words themselves have been used as a means to distract ourselves from living, from realizing how we are the very creators of a world and reality wherein a minority is having the ability to Read words, to get education to be able to read and even more so, have money to later on buy books/ written words as a means of entertainment or so-called ‘education,’ without ever even caring to first ensure that every human being could have access to proper food, water, shelter and a dignified living – including education – and then focus on developing ‘culture’ such as books and all forms of entertainment and ‘education.’ Instead we simply made ourselves believe that we were in fact able to ‘evolve’ as species with our intellectual realms of books and science and culture within the elite reality of one third of the world only, while the rest as the 2/3 were deliberately ostracized and minimized into a reality of poverty and absolute lack, where a book would mean fuel for a fire due to lacking any proper services to live. Within this, realizing to what extent when being brought up in a particular cultural context within the world system of money, we do not even question how it is that ‘our culture’ is based on money and how the very use of words and appreciation thereof is an elitist activity that is in fact a smack on the face of those that have no money to live, which means they have no education to ‘indulge’ into the ‘joy of words’ that I would solace myself with as a means to only cult.ivate my own self interest of ‘culture’ and ‘intellectualism’ that I was aiming at becoming, remaining behind a bunch of pages for extended period of time just because of not wanting to actually get out into the world and dare to see the reality that we are busy destroying due to this extreme egotistical versions of ourselves wherein we do not give a damn about one another, but only seek to live the most comfortable hedonist lifestyle at the expense of those that must work as slaves for us to have such comfort.

 

I forgive myself that I ever accepted and allowed myself to deliberately praise people that would write in what I would define as a ‘gifted manner,’ without even questioning what the hell I was imprinting into myself through reading stories for my own pleasure and satisfaction, never realizing how these same words were being used to create laws and regulations that have denied the most basic human rights to living beings – within this never pondering how my apparent ‘love for words’ was in fact sheer self interest and self-indulgence within a small bubble of ‘human creativity’ that used words for mental masturbation, without seeing how the very system we live in is separated by god, the words we speak and as such we have attempted and tried to play god through sentencing ourselves in ways wherein some can have ‘the power’ over others, where only a minority can use words as way to sentence life or death through our constitutions, laws and policies that we have simply neglected to become aware of, simply because that would imply having to realize that we have all been equal participants in this world as it is, and that it is in our deliberate ignorance and disregard for politics as the judicial and legal systems as well as economics that we have instead opted for the ‘friendly’ use of words such as for books as literature, entertainment and even so-called education that was only directed to perpetuate the same ways of a system that has never valued life – hence words have only been used as a means to exert power and control over life, never ever supporting who we really are as an actual means to communicate and ensure living-conditions for one another, because words are also currency.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in the parasitical side of the system wherein through and by me having money at this very moment makes me part of the evil of humanity that has rejoiced and even having the luxury of deciding in what ways I can use words to suit me, to make myself more ‘knowledgeable’ and ‘special,’ without even pondering if such ability is available for al as equal as one – and within this, not having realize how that which is simply ‘common’ for me such as having a computer to be able to type, having the education to be able to write and read, having had the luxury of knowing a second language in a written and spoken manner are all indicators that I have simply been part of the minority in a world that praises knowledge and information as ‘more than’ ourselves, wherein I myself also sought to be part of the ones that could praise each other according to ‘how well’ or how ‘articulate’ we could be, without ever really delving into the question: What are these words in fact implying upon reality? What am I really experiencing when and as I read words that are ‘well written’ according to the standards that I have trained myself to conceive? Is what matters really the way that words are written or is it what they are SAYING as an actual expression of self? Yet because all I knew was of myself being a mind that would enjoy emotional and feeling experiences, everything I could read that would stimulate this preference/ like would become part of my reality as an ‘acceptable’ and ‘higher form of entertainment,’ taking pride in the so-called culture we get from books, without realizing what is behind this very ability to ‘cultivate’ myself while others in the same world have no ability to read or write, nor even eat.

 

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to ever question the pleasure and enjoyment I get from reading words wherein it is not about the words themselves, but about who I am toward particular words that become particular characters that I am ‘fond of,’ which is a way that I would always indicate that I idolized a particular writer/ lyricist whose words I could use to create my own mind experiences as a means of entertainment, diverting myself from my own living reality and experience, and getting used to entertaining myself with words and words and words as a deliberate way to escape from the world behind pages, and having this as something ‘acceptable’ just because it is culturally praised to be a ‘book worm’ as someone ‘intellectual’ which is once again, placing more value onto knowledge and information that exists as a very tool of separation which is how words are currently existing in our reality.

 

When and as I see myself getting an experience of pleasure and satisfaction as a positive energy experience from reading words, I stop and I breathe – I realize that this can only be possible because I have money and I learned how to read, I had enough experiences – bought with money as well – that I could imprint as memories within me from where I could create a point of fulfillment and satisfaction that I then associated with particular words, to later on being able to read such words again to re-live that positive experience that I would get from words in separation of myself.

 

When and as I see myself praising knowledge and information in the form of books, intellectuals, written words that evoke a sense of fulfillment and perceiving them as ‘more’ than myself – I stop and I breathe – I realize that I had been easily drawn to expression in itself as a way to satisfy my ideals of perfection and ‘self improvement’ based on the ability and skills to use language as a way to make myself special or distinct, without even ever considering how this is just an elitist hobby that is in no way equally existent for all beings in this world.

 

Hence I commit myself to re-establish words as tools to create and direct ourselves in every moment as the expression of self-correction at the moment, wherein Words as Self-Forgiveness become the keys of ‘like cures like’ wherein if our words have been the very imposition toward our reality as a means to have ‘control’ and ‘power’ over it, we make of words our tools to give ourselves back to ourselves and equalize such words as who we really are as an expression of life, wherein no specialness and no discrimination is able to exist ever again by the same ‘power of words.’

 

I commit myself to become part of the people that will educate oneself and others to stand in an equal position of understanding words as ourselves, as I can then direct this that once was my ‘passion’ as words to equalize the understanding of myself as one and equal as who and what we really are as words that can reconstitute and for the first time establish a living principle on Earth in all ways, which is Equality as Life.

 

This thus implies that I walk my own process of Self-Creation as words that are able to be directed in a way that we can all equally convey our expression of oneness and equality through a process of first, walking our own mind as the realization of who and what we have accepted and allowed ourselves to become through the separation of words as ourselves, to then walk the process of Self-Forgiveness, Self-Honesty, Self-Reflection and Self-Corrective Application in order to construct life as ourselves as the very words we decide to live and the words that we decide that we will no longer keep as they only stood as a form of separation from self here as one and equal.

 

I commit myself to establish the Equal Money System wherein education will be founded upon the principle of Life in Equality, wherein words become the primary tool to show and demonstrate our equality and oneness and the responsibility each one of us holds with how we use words, to ensure that we are all equal participants standing in equal understanding of how reality works, of how our minds works and how we sentence/ create ourselves as the very words we speak.

 

I commit myself to become aware of every single words that I write or say as a means to express the corrective process I am walking here and as such, ensure that I correct my expression into equalization as life in every moment of breath that I am able to give myself to practically become aware of who I am as every moment of expression here.

 

I commit myself to use words as a means to take responsibility for what I create as words and humble myself through walking a process of Self-Forgiveness for I see and realize what I have accepted and allowed myself to become through and as the very existence of words in separation of ourselves as life.

 

“I commit myself to SHOW that those Promoting Understanding of the MIND, have NO Clue how in Fact Functions – Step by Step – and that One Should Only Participate in any Process where you Will Become the ONE that Understands in Detail How you Created yourself in Every Way, as is Taught in the Desteni I Process.” – Bernard Poolman *

 

 

For more support to understand who and what we are as words, visit Desteni and the Desteni Forum

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Reptilians – Language: the Sceptre of Creation (Part 1) – Part 70
Reptilians – Language: the Sceptre of Creation (Part 2) – Part 71
The Soul of Money – How Illusion became Reality – Part 27

 


87. Tantrum-me

My first make-believe to suit my character is that ‘I was not like al the children that go to the supermarket and end up getting something new every time just because of throwing tantrums.’

In fact, ever since the first day of school and taking ‘pride’ in not crying just like the rest of the kids had, which later on I took as a point of superiority wherein I would watch kids throwing tantrums to get what they wanted – I would think how manipulative that was and I was mostly ‘banned from such a thing because of money.

 

So today in Heaven’s Journey to Life blog, the tantrums thrown in relationship to our parents are explained with great detail – and memories would come up, which I realized I had to then lay out for the actual pattern they represent.

 

So, the memory that has been imprinted and also told as a ‘family anecdote’ of me, is when I was 3 years old and we were in an amusement park. I was being ridden in a little cart that parents can place their kids in. However, I remember having this desire to be a grown up which I would play out in various ways. In this case, I convinced my parents to allow me to push the cart around as ‘I wanted to drive it/ not be driven’ and so, they did. I probably threw a tantrum in order to ‘get what I want’ and so, I went on walking the empty car, lol. But in a moment, they stopped to eat or something and they didn’t let me know – here is spotting a huge pattern of ‘why didn’t you tell me?’ and victimizing myself because of it as I’ll explain how and why later on. And so, I kept on going and going without noticing that my parents were not behind me any longer. And so I cannot remember what happened next but, I was giving a fake name when people were surrounding me and trying to let the ‘lost people services’ of the amusement park know that they had found a lost a girl with the name ‘Karina’ – lolol and that was the name of my favorite ‘superstar/ singer’ of the time, I simply would not even think that for this case that my name was ‘case-sensitive.’

 

So, in the end my parents did find me because they saw this group of people in a circle and assumed I could be there. The moment that I saw them anger ignited like never before – and I do recall several anger possessions/ tantrums toward my parents – I cannot remember the reasons, but I do remember the extensive energetic experience of it. And this time when my parents finally found me, I just had this intense anger toward them for ‘having left me alone’ when it had been ‘my will’ to step out of the cart and drive it myself.

 

My parents felt guilty of course for not looking after me and essentially forgetting about me while they were eating and I just had kept on going – and to say the truth I cannot even remember if I kept on going to deliberately get lost because they simply had ‘forgotten about me’ – of which I see that it is just the mind blowing it all out of proportion in order to justify the victimization that went on.

 

My father approached me with a bottle of coca-cola and something else, something probably like ‘junk food’ or sweet as a means to ‘compensate my tantrum,’ because I was absolutely possessed with anger toward them for ‘having left me alone.’ And what my parents recall is that I was trying to kick them and hit them out of anger, even if they were trying to ‘solve the point’ with giving me stuff that ‘I liked’ in order to ‘soothe my anger,’ but to me that was blatantly wanting to ‘buy me’ and I realized that they were just doing this to ‘calm me down,’ – which is another point that emerges when I would deliberately go ballistic as in ‘playing crazy’ with my mother lol until she would then start patting my back as if I was really crazy which would infuriate me even more because I was being ‘pacified’ which was just giving more fuel to my desire to just cause a friction and conflict toward them, but specifically my mother, which is a point of friction/ separation that I also have realized in an absolute ‘revelation’ like realization in the Heaven’s journey to life blog #50 which I suggest everyone reading.

 

And so, one of the reasons why I have such a present memory of this is because they took pictures of the moment when my father is handing me the coke and something else and I am just crying and shouting – and till this day it is an energetic experience that I can recall as being absolutely possessed within the thinking pattern of ‘why did you leave me alone! Why didn’t you let me know you were going to stop’ – and I cannot remember words, but only the experience of it.  Every time I’d experience anger like that, I’d get a surge of fear with it as in fearing my own experience, my highly destructible thoughts and imagination, which I could have only gotten from the same symbols that we have lived as characters of our won.

 

I can recall experiencing like a rift or shift within me whenever I would get madly in anger, and in that memory I remember ‘feeling bad’ for my father because he was this time the ‘pacifier’ trying to calm me down, but instead I  did exactly the opposite and didn’t take what they were giving me ‘NO! I don’t want it! sobbing yet in the depth of myself really wanting and being up for taking I have to clarify that at least at the moment – and based on what my mother says – we weren’t the type of children that would throw tantrums in stores to get what they want, but instead we learned how to do it in a rather persuasive manner, politely suggesting that ‘if it is possible to buy me this, then I’ll be very grateful.’ I actually walked and entire point with my father as ‘the provider’ in one mind construct, wherein I became used to always feeling ‘compelled’ to say thank you for everything – no matter how expensive or small the item he had bought for me. I mean I got to get so use to this that I would thank him for buying me a deodorant or a box of cereal, or yogurt and basically everything that he would gladly present to me as ‘look what I bought you’ lol which when I grew up would only made me laugh because I judged his attitude as childish toward myself. the ‘consolation prize,’ but even at that age I developed an entire ‘pride’ to ‘stick to my word’ and not give into these that I had no name for but was something like blackmailing.

 

The fact that this remained as an ingrained memory is because my parents would recall it, I got a reinforcement of the moment by the pictures taken that and that one picture where my father is handing me the stuff and I am in the middle of the tantrum– I literally felt ‘bad’ about it, but I knew that ‘I had to let them know they had fucked it all up’ – which is rather frightening how we go developing all of these characters from such a young age.

 

And now that I have scratched my head for more memories, I see that this same pattern remained on how after having struggled with me, my father would just go into silence, which I have also walked extensively in relation to how I ‘cope’ with my relationships with others and how I assume things instead of talking them out wherein I had interpreted silence as a giving up on me, as an absolute state of anger that does not allow you to even articulate. And so I became that in various other examples after that, wherein I would have a conflict with my parents and my father would eventually go silent after usually saying something like ‘do whatever you want’ – and my mother just refusing to accept the point which would lead me to believe that my mother had been this ogre in my life, based on all the definitions I placed upon her, upon my observations and interactions with her.

 

Then relationships came and that single moment of realizing that someone is ‘feeling sorry’ for something they have apparently ‘done onto me’ I would use and abuse to literally ‘exploit it’ to the max because I enjoyed that sense of being able to make another feel band/ guilty/ shame – until the point wherein I saw they would no longer continue playing the game and eventually comply to it as in saying ‘oh well I won’t get any more conflict from this,’ yet going into guilt for having made the other go through such a preoccupation and conflict wherein essentially, the figure of my father trying to hand me the coke and chips or whatever, was later on replaced by various other people in my world that I would also perceive I was ‘having them feeding from my hand’ in that moment when they were asking for forgiveness of something, and I would deliberately keep recriminating on them and adding ‘fuel to the fire’ so that they could feel like the scum of the Earth. Then, once the point was drying out, I would then comply to the reconciliation, which in the case of the father situation, it was finally taking the coke and chips – and when it came to partnerships, going into sex and further ‘reconciliation scenes’ would usually ensue.

 

And so, the self-righteous little kid that was able to cause such a conflict in a grown up was absolutely ‘powerful,’ like having the idea that this person that is supposed to be ‘your authority’ is bent on their knees trying to ‘make up for the problem’ that I believed they would cause, which became a game that I participated in whenever they would go out and not let me know, they would usually buy me something so as to make up for the fact that they had forgotten to tell me or simply ‘not taking me’ which I would take as personal.

 

I realize that the relationship with our parents is a key factor to look into when it comes to the creation of characters – I  can spot various characters that later on developed into the ‘who I am’ just because of the starting point of ‘who I am as energy,’ as an experience held/ captured in memory throughout time.

Thus, I’ll be walking specifically this memory to see the patterns I played out and came to fully embody as ‘who I am’ in absolute separation of myself as one and equal.

 

I commit myself to SHOW that it is Possible to Walk in Forgiveness as Self, Breath by Breath in Self-Honesty, Clearing Every Memory till the MIND STOPS and Only Self as the Living Flesh Remains, Understanding in Complete Detail How We Created a Damaged World so that we together as One as Equal can Clean up the Damage we have Done to Restore Life as Here as It Must Be as the Actual Reality Intended Before we Created Damnation by Giving ALL the Power to Knowledge as Memory ending up as Characters Created by Our Memory as the Knowledge it Contains. – Bernard Poolman*

 

Círculo Vicioso 06

Vicious circle

 

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70. ‘Money is My True Desire’

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a relationship with money itself as my ultimate desire, love and wish in my reality wherein I have linked the word ‘Money’ to all that which I can Buy, consume and own in order to create a positive experience within me, which I have called ‘empowerment’ linked to a state of ‘happiness’/ success/ fulfillment and joy.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to learn that life is all about getting to this ultimate happiness and success within the society, which is tacitly implying having a lot of money in order to buy a lot of things that can denote that ‘I have money, I am powerful, I am happy, I am fulfilled, I can have everything I want’ – without realizing that I was trained to think this way when linking money as an added-value onto who I am as a human being that is Life in itself already – not realizing that Life is the one and only True-Value in existence.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compare my value/wealth as money to others’ wealth/money, and constantly see ‘where I stand’ in relation to other’s money/ wealth, which implies that I can only consider myself as being ‘successful’ if I see myself having More things, owning, continually being able to buy everything that I want as a means to create a positive experience within me, as a sense of empowerment and success over others.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make decisions in life in relation to my studies, my career, my relationships in accordance to ‘who I want to be’ as the amount of money I want to have, which means that I am only existing For Money, for that Success and elusive Happiness that, due to how I have been brainwashed to think that happiness = consuming/ buying/ owning/ possessing all I want, need and desire, I require a Lot of Money to achieve that, which is how I have placed myself to do everything I can in order to get that much money to fulfill my desire, without realizing that in this logical assumption that I have missed the entire point of Myself as Life of Equality and Oneness as the one and only real value in this world –  but instead have diminished ‘living’ and ‘my life’ to only Living-For-Money, to create and fulfill my desires and positive experiences.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define Money as a positive word due to all the images I have linked to it as owning, buying, consuming everything that I can in order to have a ‘great life experience,’ within this accepting that my ‘beingness’ is defined according to the amount of money I have/ own, as a determinant factor of who I am, what I do, who I am toward others and how I compare myself to others in society, because this is what I have learned to be and become: a person that is fighting and striving to ‘make it’ in this like, with ‘making it’ signifying getting a lot of money in order to have All that ‘I’ Want – without ever questioning if this attainment is even possible for those that have nothing to eat and are deliberately secluded from this ‘choice’ in life by our own acceptance and allowance of money as separation from who we are as life.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define Money as a negative thing whenever I Don’t have any money, which is when I start questioning WHY I can’t have money given to me unconditionally, why is money not given to all beings in order to have a dignified living – within this realizing that: as long as I have money = I only care to augment my own capital/ money/ wealth and attain more and more and more until I am saturated with the most money I can make in my every day living – and when I have No Money, I feel miserable, I feel ostracized, rejected, doomed, see everything dismal and with anger because I cannot have what Others have, wherein the example of the rich/ wealthy stand as that ultimate desire that is simply denied to me by the world-system, without realizing that we have all collectively agreed to make of this money system a grace and a disgrace for humanity according to the access each one has to Money.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that whenever I see myself worrying about money, thinking about money, wanting and desiring money, I am in fact accepting the premise of money not being a tool given to all to live, but has become the very reason and purpose of my every day living as a motivation to live, wherein I have absolutely forgotten Who and What I am as Life/ Living of oneness and equality, because money has become our very separation from that absolute wholeness that we could in fact live in/as if we all collectively agreed that Money can be a Tool to provide, give and share to one another that which is here of the Earth in order to LIVE a wholeness of life as Equals.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to take Life for Granted whenever I am only existing as this desire and constant search for Money as that experience of fulfillment, happiness, bliss, completion without realizing that it is all based on a consumerist society wherein even if I have enough to eat, to live well and comfortably, I am seeking MORE as that is what I have defined as ‘Success’ and ‘Happiness’ – wherein I go day by day comparing myself to the lives of other human beings in order to see ‘who I am’ according to the money that I have and the money that I see others have.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel inferior to others if I see that they have a lot of money which I have then defined as them being happy, fulfilled, satisfied with themselves as a synonym of ‘wholeness’ without realizing that the only wholeness that can exist is as the totality of this world, as LIFE itself that we have controlled, diminished and made an object of desire when equated to money within a monetary system that does not grant equal-access to Life by virtue of Living – this implies that who I am in relation to others exists as the separation that I have accepted and allowed as my self-definition according to the money that I have and that I compare myself to others according to the amount of money they own and I have.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define me as either poor/ middle-class/ rich as ‘Who I Am’ because of having accepted myself to be defined to one single point in my reality as Money which determines my survival, my desires of wanting More and seeking to be ‘fulfilled’ through and as money, wherein all that I seek is to constantly being able to Buy myself Experiences that I have linked to joy, happiness, success, completion, fulfillment, satisfaction as the ability to buy, own and consume everything that I can with the power I have given away when separating myself from Life into and as the acceptance of the current monetary system as Capitalism.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to visually associate Money with everything in my reality, even my physical body, as I have come to accept the fact that organs of the physical body have a price as well as hair, selling pregnancy hosting, the image of my physical body, blood, semen, fetuses and other bodily parts and functions that can be sold, including sexual services that a body can provide which are also due-to and part of the same necessity that we’ve made ourselves dependent on as Money.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that within accepting money as my ultimate desire, I am neglecting the fact that all I am consuming is Myself in the name of a positive experience that I have linked to a single Idea, belief and concept of happiness, satisfaction and completion according to that which I have been taught and learned throughout my life wherein all that I know is that ‘I need money to live’ and in that single acceptance, directing my entire life, my choices, my drive to live for and as the desire of money, forgetting about who I am as Life in its totality.

 

I realize, see and understand that in order to stop defining myself as this ‘desire for money,’ I have to walk a process wherein I stop placing value in separation of myself as the things I buy, consume and own as a positive experience and an ‘accumulation of worth’ as ‘who I am,’ which is realizing that all the power I have embedded to money itself is a fake-value system, a make-believe system of ‘worth’ in separation of Life which is what and who I am as all as one and equal – which means that my desire for money is currently ‘real’ as long as we continue accepting and allowing the same capitalist monetary system where a ‘Successful Living’ is only linked to Money.

 

I realize, see and understand that this idea of money as a ‘moreness’ of myself, as this positive experience is in fact a product of the brainwashing that I have lived in as this current system wherein Life can only ‘thrive’ if having money, without having ever questioned why such money was not readily-given as a birth right, which implies that money in itself is a system of desires as the separation from ourselves as Life into a system of control/ power that promotes greed for its own continuation and survival, without ever questioning how the abuse in this world as the inability to have access to money/ poverty/ starvation and all the abusive jobs that are ‘the last resort’ to get money for the majority of the world, are in fact the abusive means that are used in order to create/ manifest the ideal of wealth and ‘fulfillment’ as a real inequality that is visible in our society –  I see and realize now that money is a make-believe system that only benefited a minority while having a majority with no access or in a constant survival-mode wherein one is pushed and forced to do ‘anything for money’ which includes activities and actions that clearly denigrate our own physical body, life itself into an absolute depletion of life, due to our accepted and allowed sectarian elitist monetary system that is only at the service of a few as those with money in the world.

 

I commit myself to stop my constant need, desire and yearning for ‘all the money in the world’ wherein the acceptance of a ‘millionaire’ is no longer part of my daydreaming desires as an image and picture of myself as being ‘eternally happy and satisfied with myself’ as I realize that in doing so, I am tacitly agreeing and accepting the abuse, the poverty, starvation and all forms of life degradation in the name of my dream, my desire, my positive experience, which is how and why I have to now take Responsibility for what I have done, what I have become

 

I commit myself to within stopping myself within this constant desire to buy, consume, own and Experience life through and as what I can buy into as happiness/ success/ fulfillment – I take responsibility for walking my own process to realize the absurdity of having separated ourselves from who we are as Life of Oneness and Equality and in that, commit myself to be part of the people in the world that create a New World System based on the recognition and realization of who we are as Life as One and Equal – which means that a New Monetary System must be in place, which is the Equal Money System, wherein we stop being bound to the One System that Rules us All as a belief-system of abuse, and turn money into a tool to give and receive life as equals, as we all realize that we all want to have a comfortable life, the best possible education, food, housing, the most suitable transportation, entertainment that is in support of who we are as Life, and that can only exist if I first Stop my participation within the current monetary system of abuse – in all its inner workings – and transform myself to stand as the necessary change in the meaning of who I am not as a ‘person that desires money to live’ but a person that stands as the worth/value of life itself, which is the only value I really am and exist as – within the realization that we had trapped ourselves in a make-believe system of separation of who we are as life into a form of control, discrimination and ‘power over life’ that was never real in itself, but was ‘made real’ according to how we complied and obeyed to it as the only way to ‘continue living,’ which is unacceptable and must be obviously changed in the name of Life as who we are as Equals.

 

Educate yourself at Desteni

Equal Money System

 

Walk with our process of “worthing” ourselves as Life and stopping our own consumerist brainwash – Read Journey to Life blogs

We can stop existing as DEBT if we all Agree that we can give LIFE to each other as Equals

 

This blog is a continuation of the exploration of Money as a Word and Concept in separation of Life itself:

Blogs for Mind-debunking:

 

Interviews:

The One System that Rules us All
Reptilians – The Power of One Word – Part 58

 

equal money system - money for all as life


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