590. From Defensiveness to Openness

Or deciding to challenge my own past decisions to ‘get away from’ certain relationships and instead decide to develop a common ground with them this time around.

In looking back at this month that ends today, there’s been a lot of ‘movements’ going on which I’ve decided to do and ‘take on’ in terms of self-investigation and so also creating openings with people that I had not talked to in a long time and in a way ‘opening the door’ that I had comfortably shut in my past for reactive reasons of course, which I’ve now come to reassess because a lot has been changing or ‘opening up’ within and there’s like this expansion going on that I’ve taken on as well as a drive to re-connect with people, meet new people, etc.

Through doing the self-preparation to get this done, I noticed this ‘defensive’ stance within me which belongs to the ‘religion of self’ where I was the one creating this armor or invisible fortress around me that would contain ‘me’ inside of it with all of these reasons, excuses, justifications of why I would not ‘get along with’ certain people anymore, or why I just didn’t have to talk to them again. In a way I was quite blinded by my own ego and ideas of ‘who I am’ which prevented me from precisely even thinking of challenging such perceptions and re-approaching people that were once quite close to me in my life.

I’ve also realized that yes, at the time it is what I decided to do and it was part of my own self-rediscovery process, finding ‘who I am’ beyond all the relationships I had formed and this ‘who I am’ to those people as well. But it’s also very normal to say that once that ‘self-processing’ phase is over, what opens up next – at least for me and how I’m deciding to live it – is to reconnect, to re-establish communication and that’s something I’ve been doing here and there throughout this whole month, not only with people that I stopped talking to before or with family members, but also in terms of opening more of myself to myself and so being able to comfortably share it with others, and also with new people that I’ve come to develop a cool communication with.

Though I had this particular experience where I did notice I had to physically ‘walk through’ this fortress that I created around me as my ‘righteous ego’ as I was meeting with an ‘old friend’ the other day and as he was explaining how he views himself, the world, his role in it and going into expressing himself the way I used to in terms of ‘giving up on any change in the world’ and being generally ‘pessimistic’ in his own view about things, I noticed there was this emergence of a stiffness within my body, and I became aware of it ‘building up’ as this tension which would many other times lead me to speak faster, louder and in essence end up in conflicts with people.

In that moment I realized this was my ‘fortressed ego’ emerging, rising, believing that he was speaking in those terms because of ‘wanting to show me he doesn’t agree with my current stance about the world’ or where I instantly went into ‘defiance’ mode of ‘what I stand for’ but that’s the point, I realized how in wanting to create a ‘battle’ against anyone that doesn’t ‘agree with me’ I am – of course – becoming part of the problem and recreating the same mechanisms that have led us to be ‘divided and conquered’ as human beings.

So what I did in that moment is keep quiet while being aware of what was ‘building up within me’ and decided to keep listening, understanding where ‘he’s currently at’ in his life and ‘views’ on things, until I decided to intervene to explain how one of the reasons why I stopped hanging out with him before is because I would perceive us to be in ‘very different stances’ in ‘how we view things,’ instead of rather being able to focus on finding a common ground. Here, as I spoke those words to him, I could still notice that there was this ‘stiffness’ which is the ego-fortress of defensiveness coming through and I was able to move through that ‘stiffened stance’ to the solution which I mentioned in that moment: let’s focus on creating a common ground.

I kept then listening to what he had to say not so much about the ways he defines himself at a ‘theoretical level’ but more so in ‘who he is’ on his day to day living in the job he has, and it turns out that he’s definitely not at all what he has defined himself to be. Who he is in his day to day living is in fact commitment to do his work the best way he can, to support himself to get out of certain harmful habits, destructive relationships, becoming a responsible person that is living for the purpose of bettering his work environment with the people in it and in the business itself, using all of the expertise, skills and studies he has to precisely do just that, which has led him to a leadership position at his job and in practical ways living principles of ‘do onto others as you’d like to be done onto yourself’ and stopping the chains of spite, doing the least effort, lack of commitment or discipline to do things.

To me this was very refreshing to see within him, to see how throughout these past years he’s gotten himself to a stable position after having walked through,  yes, quite a bit of consequence of precisely not doing and not being ‘all of the above’ towards himself and his relationship to the many jobs he’s had. So, that’s when I told him how he is not who he says he is in fact when it comes to ‘being pessimist’ or ‘seeing no way out in the world,’ otherwise he would not be living what he is living in his day to day, which is actually enjoying life, enjoying his role at work and being a very humorous person that yes can be ‘cynical’ and ‘satirical’ about reality and having all of this baggage of information/theories about reality, yet still remain very practical and supportive in his approach to his life as it is.

I reflected upon all of this to see how my ‘reunion’ with him went from me initially recreating this ‘fortress’ around me that had led me to want to ‘not talk to him again’ years ago, to walking through that ‘mirage’ and keeping myself open to create a common ground, to learn from the person, to understand them and how that left us realizing that yep, we do in fact have that similar approach to life even if we cannot agree in ‘concepts’ or ‘theories’ or whatever else that stands in the way of human beings as knowledge and information, as self-definitions or ‘creeds’.

I let him know that I am definitely glad about the changes and ‘upgrades’ in his life and how I appreciate the process he’s gone through to ‘get to where he’s at’ right now, and how even though he denies himself as being a ‘practivist’ to make things better and so ‘change the world,’ he’s in fact doing just that with his everyday doings at work and in the relationships he’s deciding to have now.

Here then I look at what would have happened if I had simply ‘reacted’ to ‘knowledge and information’ and decided to repeat myself in my ‘defensive stance’ towards him? We would not have gotten to realize that we are in fact able to talk, get along, enjoy our communication and have things in common if we both leave our ‘self-definitions’/personality cages behind and instead focus on the very practical, simplistic ways in which we share our doings, what we’ve learned about ourselves, what we’ve gone through and what we are currently doing in our lives, which is what we plan on doing from now on.

This also led me to realize – and I also shared this with him – how we get entirely ‘lost in translation’ when it comes to how each person approaches one word, where some people react to words like ‘equality’ or ‘forgiveness’ or ‘community’ or ‘oneness’ or ‘potential’ or ‘self support’ or ‘entrepreneurial’ and judging it as ‘positive hogwash’ which I sure did at some point in my past as well, only to get to a point of understanding what these words mean in reality.  I actually shared with him how I see that he is in fact living those principles even if he is not aware of it, or if he is defining them ‘differently’ in his own mind – but how in the end what matters is ‘who we are’ in our day to day and the actions that we do which speak louder than words as ‘definitions’ or ‘ideas of self’ which yep, we definitely have to either equalize to our doings, to ‘who we really are’ instead of keeping ourselves caged in these limitations that usually become labels that more often than not lead us to have conflicts and disagreements with others, just because of how we define ourselves as information, instead of focusing on the actuality of what we do, the nature of what we in fact ARE and DO, which is what matters in reality.

I’ll definitely continue nurturing this point of communication with different people because I thoroughly enjoy getting to know, understand another and even more so when I have a certain ‘history’ with them and so challenging myself in being able to ‘reconnect’ with others beyond this personality they knew of me – and at the same time for sure get to learn from them and what they’ve gone through throughout all of these years as well. I definitely enjoy those moments when I get to have something be ‘triggered’ within me and decide to ‘disarm’ myself within it all, it’s like being able to burst my bubbles in a moment and move into a decision to be open, to embrace, to be vulnerable, to be understanding – and that’s a very refreshing and liberating thing to do.

Thanks for reading.

 

 

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503. Redefining Logic to Develop Common Sense

 

Or learning to question ‘who we are’ in the factors used to create a ‘logical outcome’ and in doing so, change how we live within our minds.      

Several years ago I came to understand that logic and common sense is not the same thing. That meant that the way in which I had learned to understand the outcomes of things based on these premises or factors that would be added up in relation to one another to create a seemingly ‘reasonable result,’ is not in fact a clear way to distinguish what is best for all, what is common sense and what makes sense altogether in relation to living principles.

Recently I’ve been looking at this point based on assisting someone that is now facing consequential outflows in their life based on giving too much into this one seemingly ‘normal’ mechanism of our minds based on logic and how through following this logic, he has made himself believe that all those premises or factors as ‘reasons and justifications’ made sense in his mind, that they completely added up to what he then defined as a right to demand justice or expose unfairness about something he has in fact created and participated on throughout his entire life.

The point being here that logic is sold as this mathematical verbal certainty that leads to the correctness in thought and being able to identify ‘false reasoning’ but, something that we are never taught about Logic in school – if you were even in a school that teaches logic of course – is that the premises should be questioned based on the subjectivity that they can – most likely – contain as emotions, feelings, perceptions, assumptions, judgments, preferences, desires, fears, ideas, beliefs, speculations and a plethora of other forms of ‘thinking’ that, when seen through the eyes of self-awareness, self-honesty and self-responsibility they all should be questioned as ‘unreal facts’ and understood as aspects or mechanisms of ‘who we are’ in our minds that should be at all times questioned as faulty-thinking, as unreasonable premises that would not then ‘add up to’ an ‘always- acceptable’ result, because we have to actually first learn to question the ‘thing’ that we are thinking with. And no, this is not about morals or ethic either, it’s about common sense.

I’ve shared this fact many times before but I’ll say it again. I once questioned my physics teacher in junior high school about subjectivity and objectivity and said that there’s never real objectivity because we are always seeing through the same instrument, the mind, and so how can we then know what is ultimate ‘objectivity’ according to science if there’s no other way or method to measure reality with but through our bodies, our minds, our senses as human beings? No response in common sense but only through logic: well, we had to establish a convention. And this ‘convention’ as a collective agreement that we’ve formed around logic thus needs to be challenged and changed.  

I’ve seen myself and so many, well every human being in fact using logic to perpetuate a faulty state of mind wherein we actually diminish our capacity to change and take responsibility for ourselves, our lives, our every moment participation in self-creation, because we accept those premises/factors used in logic as reasons, ideas, beliefs, justifications, fears, opinions, assumptions and judgments entirely as ‘who we really are’ which in turn creates a blind acceptance and allowance of even the worst time of experiences and outcomes in ourselves just because we believe that’s ‘all that we are.’

We haven’t been taught to defy our thoughts, we haven’t learned to challenge what we believe is entirely ‘real’ of ourselves and that we believe is ‘unchangeable’ but, if it is existent at a thought, at an energetic experience level that comes and goes, if it’s a preference that can be changed with some other ‘logical statements’ in the form of persuasion from another person towards you, what do we know? It isn’t real, it’s not physical therefore it does not need to stand as this ‘ultimate truth’ that then creates a realistic/true premise that in turn creates a realistic and true outflow or consequence which we have come to simply ‘accept and allow’ and not question.

Let’s look at an example of ‘logic’ thinking without any common sense:

“If I feel bad because of another rejecting to be with me in a relationship then I have the right to get back at them with vengeance and spite, so I proceed to build up hateful thoughts about others in my mind and act them out.”

It’s a seemingly perfectly ‘logical’ example there, and a person can live by this logic for their entire lives, always getting to feel good at it because ‘it adds up’ in some way in the mind, in reasoning, but never in fact questioning every component of that equation. There is no decision in that statement to question the experience, the ‘feeling’, the assumption, the desires, the anger, the spite, the vengeance and therefore the actions that end up being motivated by these experiences in the mind that in turn can also become a real-time scenario of living out on this seemingly ‘perfectly logical’ statement, yet never questioning who we really are in those premises in the first place, what are we creating with our thoughts, are we even considering that they only reflect our nature and not at all do they in fact define others?

Fuzzy logic is the mechanism with which we instruct ourselves and machines alike to function, to create an outcome, where the input and output is determined by the programmer. There is nothing wrong with ‘the program’ as the mechanism of ‘if, then, so’- the problem is the kind of premises we use in such equation and what it reveals about ourselves, that is what needs to be questioned instead of being taken as ‘normal human emotions’ for example, because that’s why we have led ourselves to where we are now.

Another example of logic without common sense:

“When I get stressed by having to work 9 hours every day then I decide to binge on alcohol, sex and party for the rest of the weekend to chill out, so I proceed to do this religiously every single week and it’s become my lifestyle. “

Logic strikes again, ‘makes sense’ to whoever accepts such stress and relationship to work as ‘unchangeable’ as something that just ‘is’ stressful and can’t be changed, which then in turn justifies the acceptance of indulgence into all excesses as a form of ‘distraction’ to ‘relax’ as a polarity outcome to the first premise that went unquestioned in the first place. Then the result is a set of habits, patterns, addictions, social conducts or even ‘normal human behavior’ that is massively accepted as ‘how we are’ ‘how we work’ and where have we gotten ourselves to with this? Yes, to the current state of affairs in and as our world system, our societies which demonstrate there’s really no change or supportive ‘evolution’ at the moment for the most part.

The point here is to learn to question and challenge any and all premises as reasons, justifications, ideas, beliefs, notions, assumptions, perceptions, preferences, opinions, feelings, emotions, experiences that we have accepted and allowed as ‘the reality of ourselves’ without a question. It’s necessary to make that first step to investigate it all, to understand their origins within ourselves and what we have created of ourselves based on such experiences within us. Otherwise we will end up in a situation where we will justify and reason our way to end life on earth, because if we don’t question the premises to act out on it, we will end up accepting that as a ‘makes sense’ assumption and that would be the end of it all.  This potential outcome actually starts within our own minds, within our own unquestioned experiences on an everyday basis, it’s really that important to consider this point.

This is thus how and why logic is not common sense and there’s a whole lot of ‘human nature’ to debunk in what may sound ‘logical’ to most.

So, how to establish common sense and principles then to see what is real and what is not? Using self-investigation, questioning every aspect that we think is ‘who we are’ and seeing what are the outflows of me accepting an experience within us, for example, ‘rage’ within myself as an emotion, what do I motivate myself to do with it, who do I affect if I participate in it, how do I sense my physical body changes if I give into rage, what am I trying to attempt or gain from becoming enraged, what is this rage revealing about myself?  While at the same time considering what is best for all, which is something we innately would know if we had not allowed so much logical clutter in our minds and stick to referencing what we think with physical reality.

Therefore, we have to develop, practice, learn common sense and the best way is by asking yourself what is best for all, what is practically physically supportive and sustainable to live by/do/create/live as? Is this experience, this idea/belief/judgment/opinion that I have in fact a ‘reality fact’ or is it something I’ve learned, something I just ‘feel’ inside me, something I have come to believe from my parents/society?

Defying our thinking, defying our logic starts by questioning who we are in our thoughts and what nature are we cultivating in each reasoning, each premise that we then use to create our own logic – this way it is possible to use fuzzy logic in a supportive mechanism used to actually develop common sense. Here’s an example:

“If I start wanting to blame others for the experience of rejection I am feeling within myself then I forgive myself for accepting and allowing such blame to exist within me as a way to divert my attention from my own responsibility, so I can now look at how I have come to create, accept and allow this negative experience I’ve defined as ‘rejection’ within me so that I can now practically decide to change my experience in the realization that no one else can ‘reject me’ but I can only do that to myself by allowing this judgment to define who I am.”

Whole new content in the same mechanism in which logic operates, yet the outcome is completely different, one where we can actually use our thoughts, our minds to get to know ourselves, to question ourselves and even establish a self-supportive outcome to follow through towards self-change.

Test it out, see where in your thoughts you are going or stepping into the “I am feeling this therefore I don’t want do to that, so I end up deciding to not do this/that because of my experience” = logic there! Not self-support, no self-investigation which ends up in the cycles of limitation in the mind, so this is very important and you can save your life by taking the time to reference our mind-references and premises with physical reality, with that which is supportive to live in common sense.

Thanks for reading.

 

For further support if you found yourself relating to the examples provided as ‘logic without common sense’

Hitting Rock Bottom – The Crucifixion of Jesus – Part 98

What to Do at Rock Bottom – Crucifixion of Jesus – Part 99

 

 

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426. Giving up vs. Letting Go

  

There was an interesting interview I listened about being able to let go of someone that is not willing to support themselves. Throughout my past, I have had a pattern of wanting to save people which then throughout this process became a necessity to want to show others their potential, to focus on the ‘good points’ they have and so how they could be used as a foundation for them to stand up for themselves. I can see myself in every person that considers they are not good enough to do something, because that was my life before. 

However, I have also realized there must be a line drawn when one stands as another cane to stand up at all times, or when someone does not even have the clear intention to stand up. then it becomes draining, then it becomes like having to take care of a chronically depressed person that has no decision to support themselves to transcend their self created experience, it becomes a way to accept abuse in one’s life as well;  It in fact becomes detrimental to another if one persists in supporting another while it is clear that after all suggestions made, all ideas for solutions, sharing of one’s own experience and many other resources for self-support and no clear indication of self-support is given, it becomes a futile process, a waste of time and just supporting another’s self-irresponsibility by treating another as if they had no way to actually assist themselves, which is a lie when we are talking about something that is entirely self-created like a constant depression or any other mind-related experience. 

I have a tendency to want others to acknowledge their self value by pointing out what I see is supportive/valuable about themselves, which is then a process of uplifting another through opinions, through my perception which in the end will enslave another to ‘my support’ because they won’t pick themselves up if I am not there. I’ve defined this as the ‘nurse’ construct, taking care of those that have derailed themselves in their lives, even at some point surrounding myself of friends that would all present similar characteristics and it is by no coincidence, in away I would find my own acceptance through being useful/valuable to others by supporting them or rather, fully standing there as their ‘cane’ which becomes an enslaving position for both sides. 

I have criticized this stance in others, yet I hadn’t wanted to admit I have done and still do the same, and if we did this about every other person in the world, we would only add more problems into our life other than assisting those that are already willing and clearly showing their intent to assist themselves.  Many times we want to save a particular relationship with the person, which means there is a point of self interest in doing so, because we like them, because they are ‘meaningful’ or ‘special’ to us in some way, but this has to be questioned, and in self honesty one cannot take such a stance toward another as it only recreates personalities, patterns of seeing others as ‘not able to do it themselves.’ Sure I agree that many of us have required such push and support for some time, but there is also a definitive difference when a person is clearly showing their intent standing by principle of assisting and supporting themselves and ‘falling’ in the process, then one can ensure one is there to momentarily step in and assist that individual – yet when it becomes the foundation for an entire relationship, and there is no clear indication of self support, I have realized that the best point of support one can provide is to let go. 

The point I have been looking at is when does one give up on someone and when is it a letting go?  I am seeing that giving up is what I have definitely experienced with regards to dealing with others and when I am the one that goes into a reaction about another’s situation/experience, when I am the one that is considering another as ‘the problem’ which is a clear indication that there was no actual self.responsibility acknowledged in this from my own side: taking responsibility for my reactions of impatience or anger or frustration or any other emotion that would ensue after I judge another’s life/process and so decide to ‘give up’ on it.  So in walking through this giving up on someone and so ensuring that I am not the one reacting to another’s words/attitudes , one can then start seeing the reality of the situation for what it is: no longer filtered by my own ‘struggle’ toward another’s experience/life, not clouded by a filter of likeness or preference or even empathic mirroring wherein I see the other as myself and so assist ‘me’ through them, no longer holding on to a past that was shared or some ‘good times’ spent with the same person – these were all filters and obstacles to see directly, to see where the person stands within their life on a day to day basis, how they react to support/assistance/suggestions for solutions and what they do with it. 

  In this, one is no longer affected by the person using or not using the support given, one gives it unconditionally, however it does get to a point wherein if there is no indication of standing up at all, it becomes a parasitical relationship, where one becomes the constantly needed ‘cane’ for another to stand up, to get some motivation or to get glimpses of ‘what could be’ if they start doing this for themselves, if they instead become their own self support after a significant amount of time that they have seen how supportive it has been to get this momentarily from another. However if one only sees the opposite happening, meaning the person becoming more and more dependent on it, or constantly requiring that support to stand up, then we have created an addict that will need one to ‘stand up’ and one cannot be the drug, one cannot be the doctor or nurse, there is a line to be drawn in order to also assist another to see how they have been shared/given all that was possible throughout a particular timeframe, how doing more would only make another dependent on one’s support and so never really give another the opportunity to stand up for themselves. 

This is how in an attempt to ‘assist’ another, one can become the constant perceived necessary cane to walk, when the bruise or injury is already healed and they are ready to walk again, we support the insecurity or muscle atrophy if we make another believe that they ‘still need us.’ This actually causes further harm than good. So letting go is about realizing that one has done everything that was possible/feasible to assist another, which is just that, showing the way, living by principle, being the example oneself – instead of dragging someone ‘toward change’ which becomes a draining experience for both sides. 

In this I have realized I also have to let go of the ideas, expectations formed about ‘what their potential could be like’ because it becomes then a desire projected toward others, which is usually charged in a positive manner, where once that one realizes it is not coming to fruition or not ‘happening’ at all, then comes the downside, the ‘fall’ of all expectations and place the person as ‘letting us down’ when in fact, it is never about ‘them’ in fact, but about ourselves, our expectation, our dreams of how ‘well’ something could work if, IF the person actually stands up. So what happens in such disappointment, the opposite of love is created, it becomes an unpleasant situation that makes us sad, angry, frustrated or disappointed, but hey! who did this to us? no one else but ourselves. 

So letting go of this constant ‘trying’ and this ‘battle’ to attempt to make others change is a necessary step if one has to get back to a point of sanity about a situation that can become quite stressful and draining at the same time. If someone is not willing to support themselves and this pattern continues for an extended period of time, then why holding on to it? So identifying the desire to do it and the fear that accompanies this is supportive to see how there are also personal interests vested on the situation, it is not entirely altruist and that’s where one’s responsibility has to be acknowledged as well in perceiving one would ‘gain’ something by another supporting themselves or that one would lose something as well by the opposite. 

I can see how many times still our most common sensical acts would want to be held on as trophies in one’s own mind, when this is just the mind that still wants to get some ‘hot air’ by doing something or ‘achieving’ something, when it is only the ego that would want to have this for personal satisfaction or because of any other hidden agenda about this. This is not an acceptable behavior in self-support assistance, no it is not an oxymoron, it is a specific term that indicates one can be a point of reference, of assistance to another’s process of developing self-support, not about ‘becoming’ their support in itself, which is the self-enslavement process I have defined in this blog. 

Should one feel ‘bad’ because one has to let go of this? Not at all, there is nothing real to lose or win anyways, this is about rather sticking to one’s own process of self-support to continue being a living example of how to do it onself, where everything one does stands as a test of time and consistency, which not only that one person/people can take as a point of reference, but anyone else that may find themselves in a similar situation in their life as well. 

There is no better support than the one that is provided without making another dependent on it, and so the analogy of stopping being a ‘drug’ or a ‘make another feel better about themselves’ role is quite spot on to understand this pattern. We cannot inject life into another and have them suddenly see things the way we see them and change, one has to rather let the point go and so go back to oneself with the things learned in these attempts to ‘support’ still standing with a point of self-interest, whichever this may be. 

There is a spark in all of us, waiting to be awakened if it hasn’t already been so, and one can only temporarily show to another what exists within themselves as well, but one cannot become the fossil fuel to keep lighting up theirs. Letting go is realizing one’s own responsibility to stop any reaction we create about another’s life/process. 

This is not a giving up on someone as they still stand within themselves, this is a letting go of my need to make others see themselves the way I see them and rather focus on myself, while being willing to stand as such unconditional support for those that clearly show they are willing to assist and support themselves, which then is not a ‘drag’ at all as it becomes  a mutual point of referencing and support, that’s definitely what all relationships in this world should be about. 

  

425. If We Dislike Deception, We Have to Become Self-Honest

There is a phase when one becomes aware of the extent of the problems in the world and we go through the vast amount of information that is at our finger tips nowadays and really get to know the nitty-gritty details of the actual prison that we’ve created for ourselves, and the challenge that comes with this is: how not to get imbued by the perception of the ‘oh so ever powerful ones’  – that are in fact a minority in this world – being the sole problem and the ones to blame for everything that’s wrong, we perceive them as being invincible, which is precisely part of the function that they represent within the whole construct of the system in itself. Sometimes the information and getting to know ‘how deep the rabbit hole goes’ becomes a reinforcement to the belief that “there is no possible way out because ‘they’ are everywhere/ ‘they’ are so powerful and invincible.” In that, we actually psychologically become subdued to what we accept as ‘their power’ which we believe ‘is so real’ that the only thing that we apparently can resort to is blaming, complaining, judging others and believing that: there is no possible way out, so why bother? This is the mentality that we have to stop and that I’ll share here how I’ve managed to constantly work on preventing me from falling on the same old patterns.

 

Identifying one’s reactions to the problems

From my perspective and personal experience, it all begins with simple steps, such as how you engage in discussing relevant topics and ‘less known’ information that is termed as ‘conspiracy theories’ which many times are not ‘theories’ but rather the hidden/occult history out of our text books in school and universities and usually explain the actual workings of  this world system, such as who has been in fact ‘behind it all’ and the mechanisms used to galvanize it, which implies that we also had to be part of such control system by compliance. An easy response to knowing ‘who’s who in the zoo’ and in fact ‘sitting at the top of the hill’ can result in us reacting with anger which in turn leads us to ‘spew our mind out’ in blaming and finding this/that president/corporation/elite person as the culprit,  which is not necessarily something that can be supportive for others that might come through and read these comments and opinions on Facebook – or any other social media site – and be exposed to this information for the first time and be shocked at discovering that their president is waging a war in Somalia, Yemen and Pakistan killing over 2000 civilians, which means it is killing people that have most likely nothing to do with any sort of potential terrorists – yet this is all being paid by your taxes… In this case,  what would you say to ‘you’ as that person that is informing themselves about the ills of the world system for the first time, and realizing that their taxes are being used to obliterate certain nations to keep control of poppy fields and trade more drugs? Reinforcing the predictable behavior such as blaming, complaining, calling names and spurting general outrage about it is Not going to solve anything.

 

So where do we start, then?

One thing that I suggest starting with is considering self-responsibility – which is a tough point, and not many people are willing to recognize it, because it involves stopping feeling righteous about calling out the abuse and instead becoming a co-creator of the mess as well. t is about realizing that by virtue of living in this same world: We Are ALL Responsible. So instead of trying to ‘change the world out there’ which becomes indeed an ‘out of reach’ type of experience when considering ‘Oh my god, I have to change the entire world!’ we have to instead consider that this change begins with taking our own lives into our own hands, to become an example, which means: start with our own life.

I bet you also began questioning why this world is the way that it is and why are people in power only being corrupted and evil and being protected by the same laws we are supposed to abide to – is the system rigged in some way? So you as I did most likely began investigating, educating yourself about the problem, developing that interest and critical thinking skills, asking questions, and maybe even getting to know others that were also starting to look for similar answers. What I’ve realized now is that understanding the problem is one part of the solution, but then comes the necessary rule of Taking the point back to oneself and so Dare to ask the more uncomfortable questions, the kind that we’ve forgotten to ask ourselves all along such as: where was I when all of this ‘conspiracy’ took place? How have we allowed ourselves to be consumed and entertained to a point where we forgot about our responsibilities?

Instead we’ve learned to equate happiness to consumption and not consider how real happiness could be genuinely built if we could all come together and agree to integrate the principles we want to live by as a society into a new proposal for a political/economic and social structure, starting with the simplicity of how we can grant each other – for example – the basic right to live in dignity? This is what the provision of a Basic Income entails. This leads to the recognition of Self-Responsibility which implies ‘They’ and ‘Those in Power,’ the ‘Invincible’ ones or those that we perceive as ‘Untouchable’ are not going to give up their power, nor do we have to focus on ‘them’ to create any form of solution either. Instead it’s about focusing on how to empower myself and others at the same time with developing this self-awareness and an understanding of the problem, without reacting to it in the predictability of anger, frustration, rage, blame and wanting to tear the government building down – but instead with maturity and self-responsible assessments.

It is about motivating oneself to see through the a new solution-based mindset and at the same time, inciting others to consider self-responsibility and Act in the awareness of ‘How can I be the solution?’ ‘How can I consider Self-Responsibility?’ within the understanding that we won’t change ‘them’ or others for that matter –  we have to be the ones that step in, we have to be the ones that are willing to correct all of our personal ‘flaws’ which entail a personal debasement to for example, believe that we are disempowered. Instead we have to prove to ourselves that we can stand up as a reformed and corrected type of human being – as a New Human Kind –  that stops all forms of hatred, deception, violence, defensiveness, attack, complacency, defeatism, laziness, conformity and the ever so corrosive illusion of powerlessness, which is precisely what I many times have considered that is created as a result of an extensive amount or information on the fickleness of the human mind that might become emotionally affected by it, becoming obsessed to continue ‘dwelling’ on the same problem in spirals without landing on Earth back with solutions.  It is at the same time strange because this creates a strange sense of false-empowerment that leads – most of the times – nowhere; very, very few are able to read, understand and use the information and awareness constructively to continue building a foundation that gathers even more reasons as to why, for example, in the case of the American ‘Secret War’ as the Drone-Wars, the funds that go to combat a deliberately created boogie man, sending people to kill and enrich all the military contractors, should instead be spent in funding the provision of a basic income in America and creating a genuine safety net to prevent an upcoming crash that has been vaticinated for some time now, yet is already quite palpable based on the amount of poverty that exists in the U.S., isn’t it? So instead of waiting for the war-jackpot to hit home and revive the economy – why not informing people about the possible solution of using that money in a supportive manner that benefits the common man at home – it is about informing the society that such Military Defense budget Is in fact people’s taxes – this is just to name a brief example.

In this, I do not speak of creating Hope either, as it becomes a ‘waiting mode’ with idle expectations based on someone, somehow ‘turning the tables to our favor’ which won’t come at all by itself, and even if it happened that way, we would still then miss out the process of realizing that we actually have to be the ones that must do something about our lives – this whole process of facing massive consequences in this world is in fact a gift to allow ourselves to see what kind of responsibility we’ve abdicated throughout time, and so at the same time realizing that it is in taking self-responsibility that the solution begins.

 

What are the Practical Solutions then?

I can share with you what I’ve done myself which begins with getting to halt my own spewing that I used to vehemently defend and share with anyone else that I could as ‘my right to point out all that is wrong’ in this world and just remain there, in that complain, in that sense of protest which I lived as what I’ve denominated ‘The Loathing Politics’ character and having an ever present and growing hatred and disgust toward virtually anything that has to do with power and politics.  I live in Mexico and one of my first ingrained memories was listening on the radio about the release of a secret tape where some politicians and party enthusiasts were hiding voting ballots beneath the carpets of some governmental building during a presidential election, this was then about the politicians doing the necessary ‘dirty job’ to rig the game…  this became part of the pattern lived throughout my life of getting used to hearing about corruption and political neglect on a daily basis, it is a part of ‘how politics work’ here, hence my loathe and despair to it all back then.

So, to the day (January 30th) 7 years ago I decided to change my life and perspective toward it: from depressive and giving up on anything related to politics/system/society to recognizing that if I want my life and that of others to be genuinely good and supportive = I have to directly do something about it. It all started by me walking my own self-forgiveness on the past hatred toward every aspect of my life that I knew was detrimental to my personal development – this includes my reactions to ‘the world system’ – specifically politicians and people ruling in the catholic church – and so made a clear decision to for once and for stop being the predictable robot that only knows how to complain and blame.I decided to Stop adding my own bs and reactions to ‘those in power.’ Instead, understanding more about ‘the truth’ of this game led me to gather more and more reasons to understand that if a ‘few’ could do it, then our potential if united as the 99% of the world that is not ‘rigging the game’ can form an agreement to take responsibility for creating a new starting point in our society. I’ve also realized there is a massive potential yet to be unleashed that we have to begin growing and enticing within each other with simple steps, changing the way that we look at politics is an example of where one can start with.

 

“We need to do the opposite of what Russell Brand is advocating, we need to use our votes. Even if we don’t want to engage with the current broken system, we should not use that as an excuse for apathy. We should see it as an encouragement to engage in creating our own alternatives, our new co-created systems; to be creative about it and to connect. Connectivity is the key to a rapid change; but information in itself is meaningless if we don’t know how to decode it into wisdom.” –

Birgitta Jonsdottir  “Democracy in the Digital Era” – January, 2015

 

 

This is thus about first understanding the problems, understanding the ‘power structure’ and so realizing that if we see politics plays a big role, if CEO’s play a big role, if influential people in communities play a big role = then We have to become such ‘big roles’ as well! This won’t be an easy task either, because we are all essentially predestined to continue blindly walking the path of the least effort, giving up on the first obstacle we encounter, seeking the most reward without having to move a single finger and so on….  well, those days will be over soon.

We have to consider that we’ve allowed ourselves to be slaves for far too long, therefore it won’t take only 7 years to ‘wake up and change’ – no, we’re talking about walking through the human conditioning that’s lasted for thousands of years, which has increased in the last century at a rapid rate and is ever present now with the ability of be intercommunicated at all times. However in a way it also prompts us to consider first and foremost: how have I contributed to the problem as well with my inaction to take responsibility for it? Is my anger, hatred or blame supportive for myself or anyone? If not, then what would I do if – for example – I was ‘Obama’? or anyone you perceive has more ‘power’ than you for that matter…well, the thing is: we all have the ability and potential, we just squander it too much when being overwhelmed and emotionally driven to give up or just continually seek to focus on something more pleasurable and easily rewarding which is part of the necessary elements to keep ourselves in a divided and conquered mentality = this is the human failure that I decided to not be a part of anymore.

What do I practically do and support?

I support myself and other individuals to walk through this same process I just described, which is the most rewarding thing I’ve ever conceived I’d be doing with my life  – after perusing a rather selfish career in visual arts – and I gave myself a purpose to every single day share what I learn, what I consider as solutions, what I see as the problems and how we can use a documentary, a blog, a news article to reflect how what goes on ‘in the world’ as our individual and collective creation.

So, you can hear all my daily recordings which is a relatively ‘new’ project here: http://mixlr.com/marlen-vargas-del-razo/showreel/ – I support and am directly involved in the promotions of the  Living Income Guaranteed Proposal Living Income Guaranteed Proposal http://livingincome.me/wiki/The_Living_Income_Guaranteed_Proposal / http://youtube.com/livingincome along with an exemplary group of people around the world at Equal Life Foundation which is part of the various efforts that we’ve proposed throughout the years as stepping stones toward political and economic change, while emphasizing on the necessity to include living principles which are similar to the same ones I’ve shared about my personal process.

So for example, providing a basic income/living income is a starting point to first get ourselves out of this survival-coerced mode and so, give each other the certainty of having the necessary to live. This in turn frees the necessary time to educate ourselves, to realize that it is about us now proposing solutions and giving that opportunity to each other to see who would we really be once that money stops being the main problem and obstacle for our personal and collective development. This also requires the will and volition to develop self-leadership and self-governance. It is not an easy task to do, though it is Not impossible either and everyone at ELF can be an example of what it is to live a regular life and still have the time to actually ‘walk the talk’ and direct ourselves to embody the principles that we agree on, the principles that we want to live by as a society and as a result of understanding the problems, which is what many people in the informed community already does – so now it’s about time to take the next step to encourage the development of a solution-based mindset.  

 

Giving up based on how ‘bad things look’ has become a common excuse to not do something about it – my take is: what else is there to do anyways in this world if not attending the problems we’ve caused? What else is there to do if not attending and raising your children, becoming an example of what is to do your work in the best possible way, supporting others to become better themselves, to recognize their potential and assist others in developing it –  which can be done once that one works on one’s own  – practicing our communication abilities, creating supportive personal and working relationships, becoming a living example of what is to Really ‘Be the change you want to see in this world’ and the list goes on…It only takes a decision from ourselves to be a part of the not-giving up group.

 

I would not even focus on trying to awaken those that are too fearful or complacent to even spare some minutes to read, watch or hear something that is beneficial to the whole. We tend to discourage ourselves from believing ‘no one cares’ when in fact, many Do care, but have no idea of where to even start with looking at a way through this mess, so that’s why education and information with a directive proposal for solutions is required and what we are in fact here for, no matter how ‘impossible’ it may seem at the moment – everything starts steps by step with oneself, isn’t it?

 

If we want to stop corruption, then let’s develop self-integrity, if we want to stop all lies and deception, then it’s time to develop self-honesty, if we are tired of ‘greedy people’ then we have to focus on developing moderation and being able to spot our own behavioral patterns and impulses where we give too much attention to that which only benefits ‘me’; this implies being a little bit more ‘selfless’ which is not giving oneself away, but developing a genuine care and empathy for others around us, as they are ‘us’ as well –  yes, even those in ‘high places.’ If we are so tired of the ‘same old’ bs, well, we have to also do some self-introspection and be willing to see and recognize what of ourselves we would like to change, what destructive patterns and habits we have that we know only lead us to a predictable outcome of failure/giving-up/passivity/complacency… how about instead we start considering how we affect ourselves/ others with our words, actions and inactions? What would it mean and what would I do if ‘I’ today had to become a person that is at the service of others like a public-servant/politician?

These are questions that lead us to recognize that we don’t have to wait for a president to give us nice answers on how to solve the problems, we can instead begin this process bit by bit ourselves, no matter how ‘unrealistic’ the feasible solutions might seem, because this ‘unrealistic’ conclusion about possible solutions becomes part of the obstacles to not think outside of the box and is part of the most common sabotage to potentially great ideas that, fortunately, are gaining more attention these days. 

These are the kind of questions that lead us to introspect and ensure that we live every day willing ourselves to see beyond the ‘fog’ and not get overwhelmed by how things currently operate. The trick is not to get lost in the rabbit hole and come out of it scared and only recreating another war as overloaded criticism and antagonism to those that we perceive as ‘the only culprits,’ or to try and attempt to ‘take the power away’ from someone through protesting and waging war – yet another one – with words, imaginations, intentions and predictable defeated outcomes.

This genuine (r)evolution is about focusing on individual self-change so that the way that we relate to one another and the world itself becomes the sheer result and accumulation of these seemingly ‘small changes’ that will certainly not get ‘Obama’ out of office – but will in turn encourage many others to start seeing behind the fog, to consider ways out in a human brain that is designed to always only focus on the friction/conflict and problem… it is about time we get rid of the belief, hope and sheer religious faith where we think that ‘those in power had to do this For Us’. It is about outgrowing the notion and comfortable denomination of ‘those in power’ by realizing that we are in fact the ones that abdicated such power: we are the majority therefore, we are in fact all capable of standing up for what we see will make our lives much better.

Our biggest problem at the moment is apathy and the perception of being powerless, and with this we do a disservice to life when we get too informed about the ultimate nitty gritty on conspiracies, but we don’t act in ways that prove we understand the problem and so have a better notion of how to start solving the problems as well.

 

I quote Junaid Malik with whom I fully agree with when it comes to the solution he proposes, and when I read his words I was glad to realize that not everyone that informs about the actuality and depth of the problem leaves a blog without a clear directive to self-responsibility:

 

“There is no short term solution to the multidimensional problems we are facing. Education and awareness are key prerequisites for the change, which can only be achieved through a long term process. Instead of being selfish we will have to revive our faith in self-sacrifice for the common good. Instead of accepting an unequal educational system, we will have to educate all the children, the next generation in this country, without discrimination. Education doesn’t mean reading, writing or getting a degree and finding a job. It means learning to see through the façade of pretense. It means attaining knowledge and wisdom; knowledge to understand what’s going on and wisdom to change it. Let’s give it a try and hope that our next generation, once educated and enlightened, will stand against injustice and inequality, showing the oligarchy the exit door and replacing it with capable individuals in the decision-making process.” – JM http://wp.me/p2zw1Q-1o

 

So, my suggestion is that instead of continuing to rehash the same old predictable self-defeat, we use our time, our words, our simple interactions to share common sense = What WE Can Do in order to realize that it is about US learning to agree on what is best for all, learning to properly communicate, learning to always take the finger back to us and be willing to recognize our own flaws and self-deception first, and so prevent ourselves from jumping into conclusions and criticizing others – it is about being willing to give it our All that is humanly possible to correct the mess we’ve co-created – we all know what would make our lives in this world better, so why don’t we instead focus on working on that which is not only meaningful and gives a new sense to our lives, but absolutely necessary and ultimately our responsibility to the generations to come?  

 Thanks for reading and: walk along if you are ready to stand up

 

You can listen to the original version of this writing here: http://mixlr.com/marlen-vargas-del-razo/showreel/if-we-dislike-deception-we-have-to-become-self-honest/

 

 

 

 

419. Devaluation of Self

It’s fascinating that when we operate in terms of ‘values’ and we value people according to who we perceive them to be – as their amount of studies, knowledge and information and generally known success in life, we sometimes create the notion of ‘famous people’ or people that could be generally perceived as ‘more important than’ or ‘superior’ to others that we have defined as ‘plain mortals’ so to speak. I noticed that this exists within me in the form of considering that some people who I would like to invite for discussions could be ‘too famous’ to actually want to be in a live discussion with me/us.

 

 

This came up as I was sharing with others about a particular person I would like to invite to a live online discussion and even if I know I am directing myself to propose it and actually eventually create it, I noticed a sharp pain on my right leg, quite on the surface but unusual though so I got to know from the person I was talking to how this relates to one’s foundation of support, and from some older notes, the flow of expression. So what came behind the proposal to interview this individual were also aspects of self-doubt in relation to how I have valued/perceived the person to be. So I realized how I tend to create these limitations based on how I have ‘valued’ a person according to their ‘accrued interest’ on knowledge and information and so how I see myself considering it would be ‘unreasonable’ or ‘unbelievable’ or ‘out of reach’ or ‘requiring something more than what I got’ to be able to actually approach another individual to discuss topics that we for sure have in common to discuss.  But then again, how/what has in fact placed such limitation? Myself based on the perception of these individuals being already interviewed by other media and ‘professional anchors’ so in this, I actually create my own limitation because I then look at the person not for the actual purpose of having a chat with them would be, which is a point that benefits everyone in fact, but I then first pull out a point of doubt of whether ‘we are up to the height’ required for it.

So in this particular practical considerations are required. For sure it would imply that I for example, have to ensure I read up to and continue educating myself to get more background on the person and their work so that I can have that same foundation for such conversation, that’s just practical stuff that I do anyways – so what changed? Well, the idea of ‘who’ the person is, so here we go!

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to consider person x as ‘way too unreachable for a chat’ considering that I have placed this person as an ‘important individual’ in their spheres of influence and within that ultimately believing that ‘they would not care/agree to have a chat with us’ without realizing that in this, I am in fact giving up or already going into defeat before even trying, so WTF?

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to consider that I would require something ‘more’ in order to be able to invite someone for a chat, such as greater production or more publicity or else, without realizing that what I/we do is what is possible at the moment and using the means that we have at our reach and as such the simplicity of it and the use of cost-less resources does not diminish the quality of the production as the conversation in itself – therefore

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a predisposition in the belief that this individual will only accept an interview if it comes from some major media outlet, without realizing that in this I am already giving up to even actually going for it and making an invitation to the person – within this, my approach has to be equal and one as with every other person I invite and so,

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create an experience of inferiority toward an individual that I consider ‘unreachable’ or ‘too famous’ or ‘too prestigious’ to be part of a conversation with me/us online – in this I realize that through this perception of the person being ‘more than’ I created my own limitation toward them and so creating an experience of uncertainty of myself in relation to how that conversation would develop – without realizing that this is all only my own mind patterns and experiences that I have created throughout time toward particular people that I have considered as ‘famous’ and ‘well known’ to be ‘out of reach’ people and me considering having a discussion with them something extravagant, meaning going ‘out of reason’ of what I would consider would be ‘suitable’ for me, which is all existent as a scheme of values that I’ve placed toward myself and others, which is unacceptable as the starting point of the whole thing is actually to promote and create a more equal society.

In this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to actually experience a tinge of fear of having a discussion with someone that I had previously somewhat antagonized and in this, I realized that my previous stance toward basically everyone that did not agree with how I saw solutions should be was that of rather continuous criticism, which obviously will lead us nowhere and so

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to actually fear that my previous criticism and mockery toward the movement that this person stands for comes back to me in the form of the person rejecting my invitation for a live discussion – in this I realize that the actual fear is that the person could use what I previously said against me and against this renewed effort to rather work together. I realize that in this I have to first forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to criticize an individual’s work and overall movement as a non-working solution, without realizing that yes we all make mistakes and what I have learned throughout these years is precisely to not create enemies, but rather be able to find a common ground and that’s my current stance. Therefore I hereby declare that I have forgiven myself for having created antagonism toward other individuals that didn’t ‘suit’ my perceptions and ideas and plans for what I define as ‘real change,’ and now that we are coming to a common ground, it seems possible that we can in fact then advocate for the same principle, which is cool and in this ultimately it’s about me being clear on where I stand in relation to this individual and the movement he stands for itself, wherein I am willing to accept my past perceptions and mistakes and so be willing to obviously start anew as this is what we all require to do in the world: to forgive ourselves for our assumptions and judgments made toward ourselves and others in order to start from scratch and building relationships that go beyond ego or ‘who’s right’ and ‘who’s wrong,’ but rather get to work together as equals.

Ultimately in all of this, I realize how my own perceptions, beliefs and past ‘trespasses’ could create a limitation in expanding toward working and contacting people that I consider are now aligning more and more with the solutions we also advocate – and so it is absolutely necessary to stop ourselves as ego from becoming an obstacle in the development that we can in fact carry out for the betterment not only of ‘ourselves’ as individuals, but for the causes that we actually stand for – this means: principle must always override any ego.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to impose a sense of ‘not being up to the height’ of another and believing that ‘the person would not want to discuss with me’ because of me not having a particular ‘popular’ stance or reputation or believing that I would require to have some sense of ‘official recognition’ in order to be able to invite certain individuals, as if there was like this ‘scale of values’ that one would have to gather in order to do so. I realize that this limitation is absolutely something built over my own perceptions toward people based on their knowledge, their information, their careers and professions, their relationships, their leadership positions and within that I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give more weight to knowledge, information, careers, relationships with what I have defined as ‘important people’ and within this create a limitation of ‘who I would be capable and able to establish a conversation with’ based on who I perceive them to be or what I would perceive they would think if a ‘regular person’ like me asks them for an interview.

In this, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use terms like ‘being a regular person’ or a ‘mortal’ meaning a person that has no ‘laureate’ from the system or that has a specific recognition or validation at system level in relation to the topics I want to discuss, wherein I then create the usual trap of ‘not being qualified’ at the eyes of others, which is part of the problem we have co-created in our society wherein we believe that one is only ‘capable’ if you are given a ‘license’ as a permission and validation that you in fact ‘know’ about something, all part of the same system of credentials and values that exist and that yes, are required at the moment in the system – but this does not diminish someone’s ability and capacity to do the same or even more than what a person with a license has.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that others would only accept or consider me to be reliable if I had some sort of recognition ‘out in the system’ so that a person then would not reject an interview with me – and within this I forgive myself that I have actually accepted and allowed myself to assume what a person would ‘expect of me’ or the kind of ‘licenses’ they would expect me to have or the amount of knowledge that ‘they would want me to have’ in order to have a conversation with them, which is all, once again, speculation and ideas based on how I have seen for example the academic world operates in hierarchical levels wherein for example teachers and their apprentices are seen as ‘more than’ any other individual in the same institution.

This actually comes from my own experiences of imposing a superior value to people in academia in fact, people that I have considered as ‘too way up in the academic world’ and that I’ve perceived that everyone reveres to them, and that they are ‘not up for just any regular chat’ which I then realized it was false once that I got to know ‘important people’ that one would see on TV or in high academic circles and at the same time seeing them in their regular life just like any other ‘mortal’ therefore

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to having carried this idea of some people being ‘holier than thou’ based on my perception of the person being ‘famous’ or ‘well known’ or having some kind of ‘important academic position’ or being ‘an artist’ or else, who are all the individuals that I placed as ‘more than myself’ including politicians of course and probably kings just because of the whole propaganda and brainwashing that is created based on the amount of ‘importance’ we believe we must give certain individuals and ‘feel’ different toward them as well, instead of realizing we are in fact equals and no amount of knowledge and information should make anyone ‘holier’ than another as it’s all based on mind values, on knowledge and information and yes, we are ultimately all made of flesh and bones and are all mortals in fact.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to ever learn from my family how to behave with ‘well known individuals’ and politics and people that I have considered as ‘rich’ and ‘very important people’ – apparently – that I kind of learned that I should revere in a way, and act even more service-like which is absolutely – excuse the word – fucked up. I realize that this comes from me witnessing how my family would revere to politicians whenever they would come to parties and kind of even change their stance to appear more service-like and ‘affable’ and ‘giving them the keys to their house’ so to speak, as if these individuals were ‘more’ than any other guest in the house. This comes of course from the imposition of value/power/authority and even ‘fame’ and recognition to particular individuals based on the position that they have in society for example – therefore

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to believe that I should get even ‘nervous’ or up to the expectation of having someone ‘popular’ or ‘famous’ or ‘well known’ talking with me because of imposing the same experiences that I got from witnessing my family and how they would behave with ‘important people’ like artists or politicians and within this, copy the exact same experience that I would perceive others would have around these people, which was that of excitement, nervousness and wanting everything to be ‘top notch’ FOR THEM, which is the whole ‘service-like’ attitude that I learned one ‘should have’ when dealing with someone that is considered famous, more important or – god, dare I say – more valuable than others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to still see a person that is ‘well known’ through the eyes of knowledge and information, through the eyes of the mind wherein I see a person based on the amount of recognition, fame, perceived authority based on the position they occupy or else and within this forget about equality because I still place this veil of ‘importance’ over others, which is of course unacceptable as I realize that we are all in fact one and equal and that we have in fact consolidated and continued to accept the current status quo based on this mind-hierarchy that we act out almost ‘by default’ toward perceived important/famous people, which is unacceptable.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to ever see some of those ‘famous individuals’ as ‘more than myself’ and this comes from the time when I would approach any artist for example and request their autograph as a child and how excited I would get from these experiences, because I learned that people that were on TV then ‘were more famous than’ anyone else therefore associating value with ‘being on TV’ or any other ‘well known position,’ which implies immediately placing myself as ‘not up to that height’ so to speak – but really, all of these ideas of importance, height, prestige, fame, recognition are all values that I have associated with a ‘superiority’ instead of realizing that they are in fact words that denote the actual work and life experience as well as trajectory that an individual or group of individuals have crated throughout their life to get to certain positions.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to add a positive and superiority value to the word ‘prestige’ wherein the fact that someone can be well known, respected and has achieved quite a lot in their life becomes an ‘added value’ in my perception and thus placing myself as ‘less than’ them based on such achievements, which I realize is a point of self-separation when one identifies oneself or another based on the amount of knowledge and information they have or ‘how’ other individuals perceive them, which is all seen through the mind’s eye.

 

Instead prestige is simply recognizing the well-known work and recognition of an individual’s life experience and contributions wherein their work  and their deeds speak by themselves and as such widespread recognition and respect is an outflow of their life, their work and contributions being supportive for others as well, which is definitely what we should all direct ourselves to aim at being and becoming in our lives, to leave our lifetime of supporting to create a world that is best for all, and so live self-respect, which means that someone’s work and recognition becomes their own life and what they say/do and act on, which is nothing more or nothing less than life, it is simply an example that we can learn from and so also see as the potential that exists within each one of us.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to associate the word ‘fame’ with an experience of superiority and ‘more than’ others comparison, instead of realizing that fame as being known or being excellent in something is not an ‘added value’ to another individual, but simply what they have achieved through their own direction and creation – whether it is for ‘good fame’ or ‘bad fame’ it is simply the general perception of ‘who another is’ based on their words and actions. Therefore, there is no need to add an experience to fame or who am I toward perceived ‘famous people’ because it is simply recognizing another’s life, trajectory, expertise and/or mastering in certain fields as yet another example of what we can do and become if we are equally diligent in the work and dedication to achieve something, which is a general trait that ‘famous people’ get to do, whether it is for constructive or destructive outcomes.

Of course the way to live fame a constructive type of fame is to become well known by one’s living example of being a solution to the world instead of a destructive role model for sure, so in that our own perceived ‘values’ over one another would have to veer toward valuing as in recognizing another individual as an example of our own potential based on how one lives by principles that recognize our equality and that consider at all times what is best for all.

Therefore, it is not to see these words of prestige, fame, recognition as a synonym of ‘superiority’ at all, but rather seeing them as the result and consolidation of their names as public figures based on the actual work they do, based on how they have contributed to the common good, which is ultimately someone that I can definitely say is respectable and for sure someone that should be recognized by all people for what they’ve done/ achieved in their lifetime. This is then the physical living and work talking for itself, which doesn’t make the person ‘more’ than another either, but simply realizing that yes they have done the actual work, they have done the actual walking of a particular point that took them to be in a certain position that they are in the world system.

 

 

 

It is interesting how even culturally we learn how to create a particular excitement or even fear when being around a particular ‘famous person,’ as if they were in fact having this ‘divine aura’ around them which doesn’t make sense as they are just humans too. Sure, one can have a particular fondness toward another individual but ultimately any person that does believe that they are ‘superior’ to others based on their fame, their work, their knowledge and information, their lifetime experience is in fact then acting from ego, and as such it is for sure their point to ultimately realize. But here, my point of self-responsibility is to ensure that I am not the one that is coming from/approaching another based on these value-systems that have led us to continue stratifying our society – this is unacceptable.

So, the corrective process is that when and as I see myself going into any slight refraction of a doubt when it comes to my ability and capability of approaching a person that I have defined as ‘important’ or ‘well known’ I make sure I identify what is it exactly that is creating the shift so that I can see what fear or what expectation came up that created such experience, and so I bring myself to the awareness that we are all human beings and there is no one ‘more than’ or ‘less than’ and so I should not place my mind’s eye as the ones to decide ‘who I am’ toward another or jumping into conclusions of ‘what the other people would ask of me’ but rather ensure that my decision to approach another is based on first of all, equality, support and the openness to dialogue and work together within the principle of what is best for all. I realize that I have to ensure that I do not use my past and my past experiences as a limitation toward approaching people or my fears/excitements or general ideas of ‘superior people’ as a veil for me to not act in common sense which means: being my own foundation and structure to give myself direction to do something based on the assessment of my ability and capability to do so.

In this, ‘who’ the other person is becomes irrelevant which means, my perception upon them is not to be used as a determining factor for it – this is about me assessing the benefit of such conversation, the potential supportive outcome of it that is best for all parts. Within this, is also necessary and quite valid to make a personal assessment of where I would require to sharpen up my studies and my review of information in order to be ‘up to date’ with what we could discuss in a conversation, but this does not mean that it’s also going to be some kind of ‘duel’ of knowledge and information either, because the starting point of this is precisely to share what each person gets to know of, understand and/or create as solutions that we can all share and learn from. Therefore

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I would have to be at certain level of ‘knowledge and info’ to be ‘ready’ to talk with another, which in a way it does make sense to be prepared but not to the level of ‘wanting to know it all’ already, otherwise, what would be the point of having a conversation with another if not to learn more from each other and so strengthen ourselves equally.

 

I realize that this is also the influence of the current debate programs and interview TV shows wherein some of the interviewers challenge the person they interview sometimes to the point of ‘who knows more’ or ‘who can win’ which is the whole ‘debating’ aspect that is actually detrimental to the public watching because we then recreate the notion that someone has to be absolutely right and others absolutely wrong or dismissed – instead of realizing that a conversation with people that I have not so much previous contact with should be about having them share their perspectives, learn and take what’s best as well as learn how to listen to the points that I might not agree with, however by creating an antagonism only on that we create further rifts and problems where the actual common ground can be dismissed, which is not cool, not acceptable in a world wherein it’s easier to wage wars than creating dialogues to establish ‘peace’ so to speak.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to perceive people that have written out books or published an exorbitant amount of words as ‘more than myself’ and within this, realizing that if the starting point is placing ‘who am I’ as an individual against another individual, ego will always create a barrier and prevent me from actually expanding and rather learning from others. In this thus, I realize that I have to ensure that my own limitations carried from the past ‘learned inferiority’ toward certain individuals doesn’t become an obstacle to me actually stretching out hands and creating contact with people that I had regarded as ‘more’ than myself, and to always realize that whenever I see anyone as ‘more than myself’ I become the very continuation of the problem I am  trying to resolve which is inequality, which is the continuation of hierarchical values and the notion of ‘power’ and superiority embedded onto something/someone above ‘the rest.’

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have given up at ‘first try’ after contacting certain individuals, without realizing that my approach was still coming from this already ‘made up expectation’ of ‘they won’t accept/ they won’t even reply’ or else, which is then what happened and then became a form of ‘defeatism’ in terms of trying to approach certain individuals.

In this thus my sole responsibility is to ensure that I realize that it’s not ‘me’ that is asking for that interview, it’s about me as the principle and foundation I stand for and as with the purpose of learning from others, of sharing supportive outcomes for humanity that is asking for such interview – therefore I do not have to place myself as ‘my persona’ before me when doing my job which is to establish connections and communication with people no matter ‘who’ it is.

In this, I realize this is the point to apply, a practical equality toward people and stopping my mind’s view upon others based on ‘who’ I perceive they are, and instead I commit myself to focus on their words, their work, their visible and practical solutions and contributions to society, which is what I am interested as a person that represents an organization that stands for the principle of what is best for all life.  In this I have to also recognize myself and to not ‘devalue’ me based on the perceived ‘validations’ I would require to ‘make me/my words/what I stand for’ as ‘valid’ or ‘recognizable’ in the world system, as I realize that there is currently no such ‘validation’ and due importance given to the consideration and realization of life in equality, of supporting one another, of truly working together for best for all outcomes and so , how can I expect me/us to have such ‘recognition’ in a world that recognizes and places fame on the exact opposite?

There’s no visible honoring toward life yet so we have to build it from scratch so I commit myself to stop expecting some form of ‘validation’ or ‘recognition’ or ‘credits’ in order to give further steps of expansion within myself and my process of communicating with others – and instead rather recognize that it is our own work, our own consistency and dedication that which makes us valuable as the principles that we stand and live by – ultimately that’s just the value of life for life and that’s rather what I decide to dedicate myself to honor, to honor life not world-system credentials and ‘values’ placed in separation of who we really are as equals, which is also what’s worth while supporting and sharing with others.

 

I commit myself to imposing money-talk to others too wherein I value others based on ideas related to energy and money, which is not who we really are and so I rather develop a communication based on living principles where equality stands as our undeniable common ground to work on.

 

 

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417. How to Become Your Own Role Model

There was a blog entry I made some time ago about the documentary ‘Come and Worry With Us’

397. Come and Stop Worrying about Money & Children with us

about one of my favorite bands and generally discussing the problems that come when lacking sufficient money while still wanting to keep producing art, in this case performing and so generally seeing a more realistic approach to the lives of the people ‘on the spotlight’ so to speak, however I realize there is another dimension there to look at and that is part of my lack of objectivity when viewing this documentary, because I had a particular kinship toward the band itself and the people in it, specifically the leader of the band who happens to be part of another band that has been well known for remaining ‘out of the system,’ giving few interviews over the years, rejecting prizes from mainstream music industry, having no lyrics on their songs yet using their titles and general sounds used in the music as a constant reminder of the turbulent times we live in – such as wars, economic depression, general emotional depression, worrying about the future etc.

So, within investigating this, I realized that the people I had ‘admired’ throughout my life were mostly artists that have been able to ‘make it’ into the system without ‘selling out’ or what I then judged as ‘making lots of money into the system while escaping from complying to “the establishment.” That was my type of ‘ideal’ in life, to be ‘out of the system’ – I once thought that was possible, lol – and still make good money and speak on the frontline of ‘the oppressed’ so to speak. I’ve debunked in the past this character but there’s a dimension that I had missed looking at in terms of how I had admired individuals that I perceived as a form of ‘warriors’ themselves, to ‘stick to their guns’ so to speak, to stick to their beliefs and what they stand for which I see that this particular individual mostly does.

 

 

In the documentary ‘Come and Worry with Us’ Efrim Menuck actually refuses to place higher prices to concert tickets in order for them to make more money  – and so have more economic solvency – because he wants to keep to the point of having ‘fair ticket prices’ for the public. This is something that I would have praised and seen as remarkable – but, is it really Self-Honest to actually go through hardship just to stick to one belief? Or is it really compromising the wellbeing of his own son/family/band for the sake of keeping his stance of anti-capitalism? Is it really common sensical to have a constant war toward money itself and wage a ‘fight against capitalism’ while refusing to do any other work and so placing your own financial security at risk, just because of not wanting to ‘sell out’ or ‘kiss corporate ass’ so to speak? My ideal was to be able to also ‘stick to my guns’ and rebel to the system in one way or another, but back then I had no idea of how even money was created or whether there was a genuine possibility to be ‘outside of the system’ – which I now understand of course cannot be a possibility even if I lived in Papua New Guinea.

 

So, in this, I realize that any trace of creating a preference for a particular individual based on the ‘ideals’ they stand for and those ideals being essentially based on antagonism toward the ‘establishment’ is still idolizing part of the problem in this world, because their ‘qualities’ are based on opposing something, on waging war against a certain faction and that’s essentially re-creating the idea of ‘resistance’ toward something or someone, instead of actually focusing on understanding the problem and so developing solutions.  Efrim himself has said how musicians are cowards because they can sing about the problems but most are not directly involved in creating solutions – and most of the solutions that come from people that follow this kind of ideals are based on further revolts and protesting, which is no actual solution in fact.

 

 

 

Today I was pondering why so many artists can see the problems in society , but all that they have managed to do is expose it in pictures, in complicated objects and abstractions that would take more than one ‘quick view’ from a person to understand the actual message most of the times. I have then seen that as much as art has had this role of pointing out what is wrong with society and mirror it back, it lacks any substantial process of creating solutions. Some have gotten more involved into what would seem as social or anthropological work, getting involved with ‘the art piece’ that is part of a particular community/in situ, however those are still packets of solutions here and there, while the more general type of solutions will always come from the greater realms that still direct our society, which is politics, economics, education systems, media, etc. And art is still from my perspective a niche part of society that creates meta-languages that only a few can understand.

 

I simply realized that in order to ‘create change in the world’ as I have aspired to do, it takes more than just presenting images, sculptures, videos to people. Sure, it is a stepping stone, a bridge – but ultimately it is one’s own process of self-change that really enables one to understand also the magnitude of the problem and so also the best ways to go directing ourselves to support this change as well.

It’s interesting that one of the reasons I wanted to be an ‘artist’ is precisely for the kind of statements an attitudes generally attributed to artists such as: ‘an artist won’t lick the establishment’s boots.’ I had not questioned even for one moment that in doing this, one is standing in a constant warfare toward ‘the system’ instead of realizing we all are the system. In this stance, one is acting as any other ego in this world that is separated from others, that is standing with some and against others, while having no real practical solution development process in it. In this it is about clarifying that it’s not about the process of creation here, but rather the personalities I had placed more value and as such an experience on.

 

Self Forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to ever idolize a particular lifestyle that stood for a particular idea of persona that I wanted to be based on my desire to stand ‘against the system’ without ever realizing how only an ego can stand in separation from another.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to idolize another individual based on the principles of ‘standing up to the system’ or ‘sticking to their guns’ as a way to exemplify people that would still survive and ‘make a living’ in an apparent non-sellout way to ‘the system,’ wherein I had created a sense of heroism toward people that would ‘dare’ to do this, and see them as role models, without realizing that in reality creating such kind of ‘stance’ toward ‘the system’ is once again perpetuating the problem as in standing ‘against’ those that we perceive as ‘the wrongdoers,’ ‘the evil ones,’ ‘the capitalistic mafia,’ without realizing we are all part of and co-creators of this ‘evil mafia’ as our world and money system and we would not be able to have the lives we have right now if we weren’t part of the system as  a whole, which implies that by virtue of being a human being in this world, using money, using resources, relating to others, existing in this world = it implies we are all part of the system.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to romanticize the idea of my ‘role models’ being individuals that were cryptic in nature, were antagonistic yet sad and dismal about the state of affairs in the world, which I associated with being profoundly ‘sensitive’ individuals and within this, justifying their stance of being ‘against the system,’ without realizing that this is in fact a victimized state of showing ‘the system’ what ‘it has done to them’ and also remain within such excuse to not partake in the actual process of self-responsibility and self-creation that is required to genuinely change things.

We can actually all learn how to coexist, communicate, come to agreements and work together within the system using our creativity for the betterment of all in a Practical Way, instead of using art as a way to only use representations to criticize, judge, point fingers and blame and taking the vantage point, the righteousness of being the ‘fair one’ that is doing ‘nothing wrong’ and can only resort to ‘complain about it.’ This is precisely how we have disempowered ourselves, by creating yet another bubble in society wherein all the people that are most informed about the problems, that see and understand the problems, that can even create ‘art’ based on it are not really working within the spheres where real change can take place, which is in education, in politics, in law systems wherein we can in fact change the codes, the rules and how we manage our society.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have surrounded myself with people that I thought I had admired for ‘taking a stance’ within the system, mostly of judging and complaining about it which I once identified as ‘powerful’ but in fact, it is the most disempowered state one can be in, and more so only channeling one’s observations into a song or a painting or a discourse against ‘the powers that be’ instead of genuinely understanding the process of changing the world beginning with oneself, stopping all antagonistic stance toward ‘the world’ and the perceived ‘evil ones’ and walk the actual process of self-forgiving all the antagonism and inner conflict toward reality so that one can focus on learning how we came to create this mess, this world-system problem and so focus our time, attention and dedication to becoming the solution, to creating and presenting solutions as that’s the real way we can genuinely unite in one single voice that stands as self-responsibility and no longer remain as futile resistance and antagonism.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself for having ever been in awe and amazed at people that I would see ‘standing up to the establishment’ or ‘daring’ to speak about everything that is wrong about the world and see them as heroes, as ‘superior’ individuals – without realizing that speaking against, shouting, marching, protesting and joining the antagonistic ‘choir’ so to speak is rather a stepping stone and a relatively easier thing to do  – it also creates a self-belief of righteousness and justice, but what has been missed is pondering how such reclamation, how such anger and spite toward the system is in fact supporting to create a solution at all? How is one’s anger, one’s sadness and despair, one’s decision to ‘not sell out’ in fact supporting to change the nature of ourselves as individuals and so with doing that, changing the nature of the world system that does function in a enslavement-mode.

Isn’t it only self-interest to create an experience within oneself of righteousness about one’s ‘beliefs’ and stance when such beliefs are defined according to begin against something/someone? In fact, all our past revolutionaries have become personalities printed on posters as an example to new generations of a perceived ‘way forward’ for change through ideals of change and a call for revolution, when in fact that will only lead to and perpetuate the ongoing wars we have.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to associate the word idol or hero in the context of people I have seen have apparently ‘stood up to the system’ but only in a fighting mode or in a ‘resistance’ manner, which ultimately keeps the war going between ‘two sides’ that antagonize each other and do not actually get to put down the defenses and work together in self-responsibility to create genuine solutions. This would be the new heroism, wherein we no longer have to ‘fight a battle’ to ‘win’ and so be identified as the ‘hero of the day’ but rather define here-oism as an individual that lives by principle, that commits to being fully HERE as Life and whose actions are aimed at benefiting him/herself and others as well.

Heroism means to stand in absolute self-responsibility and accountability, to ensure one stops all inner wars first, then a real hero or role model emerges as someone that won’t ever antagonize themselves with another, but instead lives the realization that it is only through self-forgiving our polarization, our antagonism and inner battles that we can create a genuine world living in peace and harmony, just as the one that many artists or ‘heroes’ have attempted to create. But ultimately, living in actual self-responsibility makes you no one’s enemy, no one’s ‘freedom fighter’ and so, war is annihilated when recognizing and living in equality.

 

Integrity is the congruence sticking to live by and apply living principles that stand within the consideration of what is best for all, that implies not only sticking to what one prefers or sees as ‘righteous’ but implies actually actively pushing oneself to become a self-responsible and self honest human being. This means walking the talk and stopping any form of hypocrisy by denying what is here as ourselves and blaming someone for it. All is self-responsibility, all is our self-creation.

 

Real self-change begins with oneself, begins with recognizing that this system as ‘capitalism’ is not the problem in itself, but ourselves as human beings . Taking an antagonistic stance and pretending to be an ‘outsider’ to it all is abdicating self-responsibility and creating a new self-religion, a trendy form of excuse, justification and self-belief that the battle against the government/ the establishment can in any way be ‘won’ when there’s nothing to win in a world where if we don’t actually get to work together, we will simply deplete everything that is here and we won’t have anyone to battle on any longer because fighting is never the solution, self-direction and common sense is. Why haven’t we realized how we actually co-create wars as we fight for our plight to freedom? Why should we even have to ‘fight’ for something that should be given as a guaranteed living right?

The solution for myself is once again to be very aware of any reminiscence of praising individuals for having ‘strong beliefs’ that can be disguised as justice, as ‘fighting for what’s right’ but in fact when looking at how they live, what they think and where they stand, compromising one’s financial stability for the sake of ‘sticking to one’s beliefs’ is not common sense. More so with artists, there’s a lot of creativity and engineering processes that are being squandered only in pieces that are shown in museums or streets, but still just pieces of matter, words or images that intend to open up people’s eyes but I’ve realized that art in itself as a material thing is is not enough – it can be a starting point, a bridge, an opening toward a certain perspective or view,  but currently we mostly lack ways in which to give a follow-up to that ‘awakening’ process.

That’s why sharing about this self-creative process is the most important thing I see is required in our current society, so that we can shift our focus from the fights and antagonism or despair, toward an actual recognition of our power and ability to change ourselves and so change the world. Sounds like a cliché, but I’m testing this real time and it works, and it is not a quick fix since it is like re-weaving one’s own life toward a supportive outcome. I can guarantee that you won’t be the same as you were before, but isn’t that the point of living: growing out of the constriction and taking one’s own self-directive decisions and choices in life? What a better way to do this but within a principle where all/everyone is considered, where one recognizes one’s own potential and so lives in the world embracing the current consequential outflows of our past, because we understand that cringing about it makes no difference – and instead, we focus on applying, living and becoming the solution.

 

Within this I realize that I have actually stopped following ‘role models’ and decided to rather commit myself to be my own role model and within that become a living example for myself and others of what living as a self-responsible being implies. This is then something that entails committing to live by the principles of life in self-honesty wherein I decide to make of my life my own work of art that I can actually fully stand for and so debunk the ideas of having to follow other role models that so far have led us nowhere. Not even admiring a great man that shared with us the process of Self Forgiveness is acceptable, because in admiration one beliefs one is incapable of standing as equal to another, and that’s the whole point of walking this process: to recognize our full potential as equals within our individuality, which means: each one holds a very specific key to world-change.

 

Life is rather short, we only got one life so let’s live it every moment fully in self-creation mode.

 

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414. Solution to Ferguson: Learn Self-Forgiveness

 

A fascinating point opened up as I was watching CNN. Yes I tend to criticize CNN quite a bit for the false information and scare they provoke, but as I was cooking last night and turned it on to see what kind of ‘disinfo’ they were sharing, a female TV show host was being interviewed about Ferguson and the words ‘Forgiveness in Ferguson’ were on the headlines of the news section and as I seek for such info on the net, I found yet another reverend that talks about Forgiveness required to get to a solution. What’s interesting about the woman speaking about Forgiveness is that beyond the usual ‘being able to forgive another,’ she explained there is forgiveness to apply to ourselves, which is another way of saying: we require to apply Self-Forgiveness for what we have accepted and allowed – almost her words there.

 

 

What do we have to Self-Forgive here? Upon witnessing the current ‘rioting’ and looting and anger that people in Ferguson experience, what we have to do as humanity is realize that this violence, this sense of ‘being violated’ will get us nowhere, because what we are witnessing is only the outflow of our entire history of abuse, disregard, violence and harm we have imposed toward each other, our environment, we have essentially violated our right to life by complying to, accepting and allowing ‘the way the world works’ as this current dog-eat-dog functioning of the system in a blind manner. This world-system – our laws, our institutions, our governments, our fears, our paranoia, our media, our scares, our injustice – is our collective creation, this is what we have to begin to self-forgive here first because as long as we continue to see ‘perpetrators’ and ‘culprits’ outside of ourselves, the fight, the reclaiming of ‘justice’ will continue without any sense of self-responsibility, which is the rather uncomfortable truth: any act of abuse is not done by ‘others’ but it’s always what we have collectively co-created by having abdicated our participation and decision making processes to decide what is best for all.

The fact that the word ‘Forgiveness’ is pointed out in our MSM (Mainstream-media) as something that is required to solve the problem, should not be taken for granted: it is one step further to understand that we have to step down from our righteousness, our ‘victimized self’ that we climb upon as our mind-horse where we take ‘the abused’ position to ‘ask for justice’ without first focusing on seeing and coming to realize how it is that all the problems we are facing is our collective consequence of having Never actually having cared to review the laws, the agreements, the money systems, the general structures by which we organize and live as a society, which would then of course lead us to see why do we have to create all of these laws and live in constant fear of one another, protecting our ‘right to defend ourselves’ from other potential ‘wrong doers’ or criminals, instead of creating a world system that can benefit everyone and so naturally create peace by doing so?

What we have missed is that the real problem exists within our own minds, within our desire to blame something or someone for any form of abuse, instead of seeing how no justice, no equality, no support or real care has ever existed toward one another as living beings because: We Haven’t Created it, We Haven’t Lived such words ourselves in the first place! All that has ever existed is the war mentality, the selfish nature of only caring for our own wellbeing and not even giving a thought about others’ lives.

How can we ‘demand’ something like Respect when we haven’t ever really lived SELF-Respect such as ensuring that one is not accepting and allowing any form of abuse, harm, diminishment or counterproductive actions that prevent us from living to our fullest potential, individually – so, how can we as individuals feel ‘violated by others’ when we have never cultivated this basic point of self-support as self-respect?

 

 

How can we ask for ‘Justice’ toward some authorities and institutions that we created based on our inherent belief of being unable to direct ourselves and take responsibility for ourselves within the consideration of what is best for all, to create and structure our entire economic, political and social system within such principled living considerations: considering everyone’s wellbeing, supporting everyone to live in dignity, to create a sense of community and solidarity that leads to a well-functioning society… none of these aspects have been our starting point as human beings to coexist in. Even if these ‘rights’ are written in constitutions, on paper they look really nice, but when it comes to living such words and agreements: we have all considerably failed to do so because we have ultimately abdicated our responsibility to live such principles ourselves, individually, which leads to outcomes such as wars and any other form of brutality imposed by our designated ‘authorities’ to create a sense of ‘order and control,’ organisms and institutions that exist as an outflow of us believing that it is more important to impose punishment and be constantly spied on for a sense of security rather than focusing on providing everyone a general good living standard so that the ‘anomalies’ of the system are reduced to genuine mental problems – not ‘criminality’ as theft due to the necessity to get money to live in basic dignity. This is what we have co-created as our social injustice.

This is why, the more we face consequences that shook the foundation of our so-called ‘stability’ or disrupt our belief that ‘everything is generally fine,’ the more we have to start considering that the solution resides within each one of us. It is awaiting to be ‘awakened’ as a sense of self-responsibility to first Live in each one of us such as Self-Respect, to Take Self Responsibility for what we have co-created as our world and so be Willing to Work Together for solutions, to no longer depend on institutions/authorities that are there to ‘calm the waters’ based on imposition of force or further punishment toward those that have resorted to violence or crime because that’s all we have ever learned as human beings to do in moments of distress, fear and desperation to ‘get an answer’ – once again, just because we haven’t learned how to become and implement solutions that benefit everyone, which is absolutely possible for us to do.

 

 

The solution begins within self: not giving into fear, helplessness, hopelessness, rioting, protesting or ‘demanding’ answers from those ‘authorities’ we have placed in such positions because we have rendered ourselves as useless or incapable of solving our own problems – it’s about time we begin to Self-Forgive our perceived victimization on these events, to self-forgive the accepted and allowed abuse we have co-created as our ‘world system’ and how we treat each other as criminals, as potential enemies, as a ‘problem’ instead of facing our own problem inside ourselves: to face and self-forgive our paranoia toward each other, to face and self-forgive our fears, to face and self-forgive our belief of being incapable of changing things – we have to self-forgive all of the ideas, beliefs and perceptions we have about the problems that are going on in this world, to not call out on the perceived ‘culprits’ but to stand up in the realization that: we did this to ourselves, this is our creation and only through allowing us to self-forgive this massive abdication of self-responsibility will we ever come to a general agreement that the solution resides within each one of us: to learn how to Live Self-Respect, to Live Solidarity and learning how to Live by Principles which will prevent us from having to ‘punish’ others as a way to solve problems that are fully preventable if we so agree and decide to create a world system that can benefit everyone’s lives, because that is what we all want for ourselves anyways, isn’t it?

 

The solution is not further police intervention, no further ‘presidential intervention’ or curfews…

 

Time to focus on the solutions, on Self-Forgiveness as a first way to recognize our complicity and Self-Responsibility in all problems in the world right now and so creating a culture of becoming and providing Solutions instead of continuing existing in indignation, victimization and the perception of being powerless to change things.

The time is now, we have only one life to do this – so let’s stand up as examples of what we can be and become when we integrate self-responsibility in our lives and expanding this sense of awareness toward others in our everyday living.

 

Listen to this Podcast on Mixlr:

 

What’s MISSED ABOUT FERGUSON AND ALL ‘BAD NEWS’ IN THE WORLD

 

 

Investigate the Living Income Guaranteed Proposal

 

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409. The Uncomfortable Truth

 

 

 

One of the reasons why this process cannot be done by ‘one individual alone’ is because we are very prone to creating our comfortable bubble where we believe that ‘nothing is happening, I don’t react, everything’s done, my mind is quiet’ and how else would it be if I remained in my own little world and my own little bubble!’ So that is certainly not walking process. Facing yourself as this world is not only facing ourselves in our own minds or as ‘the world system’ but facing each other as the mind we are and have become.

 

So, here I open up my recent reactions to the exposure of my own truth which is the state of the mind that we all have and how whenever someone dares to ‘show it all’ then I react ‘OH man! how dare that person do that!’ or ‘How can that exist within a person’s mind?’  which is all backchat that is in fact immediately dodging MY own responsibility to myself, my mind, my judgments instead of immediately reacting to ‘assess’ another’s mind/words/actions/behavior within me as the character of ‘politeness’ or keeping things in order and control, no different actually to how politics operate and I will open up this point of politeness and how it is in fact of course a façade and self-deception that as anything, can be walked through and rather turned into an expression of consideration, instead of a blanket used to cover up that which I ‘don’t want to see/face’ as myself which is essentially just postponing facing the inevitable which is the truth of who we are and have become as our minds, and so to not judge ourselves as the mind, but rather learn how to support ourselves, how to understand ourselves as the mind, how to self-forgive and so walk/live the corrections which is the real direction for self-change required here.

 

The most important thing within this is to realize that taking one’s mind or another’s mind personally is a reaction, it is of the mind and it is only perpetuating the same problem we have co-created because it is like realizing that one participating in one’s mind is like giving fuel to a fire. So, basic point here is also to realize that we’re all in a process and even if one is aware of the tools and ‘knows’ about the principle of self-responsibility, it doesn’t imply that ‘that person is going to take self responsibility’ or ‘is not reacting at all now.’ We are all walking through it and what’s more important: if I react to another and turn it as a point of having my expectations ‘unfulfilled’ it means that there’s a point of expectation that I haven’t really sorted out and a point of reaction toward words/actions that exist in one’s mind behind such ‘disappointment,’ and that because this mind exists within me and everyone, then it is my responsibility to actually take responsibility for it – No more and no less, no matter ‘who’ I believe is triggering an experience within me, I have to be able to stand absolute regardless of what is being said/done either personally or indirectly.

 

I realize that my responsibility does not extend only to ‘myself’ but others as well,  and that’s where I tend to simply think that well, I can ignore the person/situation and not make a fuzz about it – but if the person is already walking a process  and they are already working on themselves to stop the mind, then it is absolutely my responsibility to support another within my possibility and ability to do so,  as that is exactly what I would like and want another to do with myself as well, which is actually what I have lived through these past years of being supported as part of a group walking this process of unveiling the ‘uncomfortable truths’ of ourselves as the mind, that which we have kept secret and ‘veiled’ throughout time.

So here is a self-reminder how everything works in reverse in the mind: we have to be cautious when things seem ‘too stable’ or ‘not much happening’ and instead whenever conflict emerges to be grateful for it as it is unveiling an aspect of myself, of ourselves that we haven’t faced as is the case here.  

 

 

“The Human Being, being Sensitive to Discord, Disharmony, Disease – are very easily Motivated to Seek Out the Harmony within themselves as the Equilibrium of Multiple Systems, Interacting within Relationship of a Closed System, as a Balanced Perfection for the Sole Purpose of Keeping the being Engaged at All Times; to Seek the Equilibrium and to Keep the Equilibrium going, and where Mastery will be to become a Master of Love, and Stay within the Geometrical Equilibrium.[…]

This Principle has been Very Cleverly used to Keep the Physical Reality in a Form of Stable Control. With None of the Beings in Multiple Forms Realising How their Existence has been Systemized to be Followers of Reaction and Instinct. Followers of Pre-Planned Preprogrammed Designs, with Rewards along the Way when Equilibrium Spots are Hit within the Map of the Book of Life.” – Bernard Poolman

 

 

 

This is the realization that everything that I judge in another exists within me.

 

 

Continuing from:

• 408. Taking it All Back to Self-Responsibility

 

Self Responsibility and taking it All back to self at the individual level.

Based on the usual judgments I have created upon people that I perceive have something ‘wrong’ in them to, for example, be what I have defined as deliberately ‘evil’ or deliberately ‘deceptive’ or deliberately ‘conflictive’ and perceiving myself that ‘I could not stand such individual’ is demonstrating to me one thing only: where and how I have not yet considered such individual as myself.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from another within the consideration that if the person is too mind possessed, too conflictive, then I don’t want to have anything to do with the person, which is essentially playing what I had criticized in our society wherein those that were mentally challenging to society and deemed as ‘crazy’ or ‘too out of the loop’ so to speak, were exiled and sent out of the main centers of society, as they actually posed a threat to the order, the ‘system’ in itself which I also conceived as a reason to simply not have to ‘deal with’/walk with and actually learn how to assist and support ourselves as individuals that can be mentally challenging when it comes to how we operate in our minds.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become my own denial as in wanting to not face or excuse myself from having to confront/face a part of me as another individual that exists in fact in each one of us that have a mind, wherein when seeing patterns in another that I believe myself ‘incapable’ of doing or not being able to ‘fathom’ them, I go into a helplessness situation toward that point/person/mind that I am in fact then still reacting to within the belief that ‘ I cannot conceive how that can exist in another/ why they say/do things in such ways’ without realizing that who we all are and have become in our minds is essentially the description of being mind controlled, being schizophrenic as in being separated from each other, from our physical body and have become nothing else but ‘agents’ to consciousness, to the mind which we here understand that it has never existed within the principle and consideration of what is best for all because the starting point and origin of our mind was never meant to support our self-realization of being in fact equals and one in this reality and so

When and as I see myself creating a denial/existing in denial based on how I react to another’s mind based on backchat, beliefs, perceptions, assumptions and expectations of ‘how another should act/be by now’ I stop and I breathe. I realize that here I am going into the assumption that people have had to ‘change’ already according to time and process application, without realizing that me reacting to another’s mind possession or patterns is in fact indicating my own patterns, my own reactions that I still have to deal with/walk through which is the whole point here. I realize that it is not about ‘the other person’ as it is all about myself, my own reactions to words/patterns/behaviors that exist within each one of us as mind consciousness systems that even if we know ‘how to support ourselves’ with self-supportive tools, I am here being the proof that going into denial, helplessness, disbelief, disappointment about others is really only about myself that am still reacting to people’s minds, processes and experiences.

 

I commit myself to when facing a person that is in a particular mindset that I have defined as ‘tough’ or ‘challenging’ that I then place myself in the position of understanding which is a practical humbleness that I have to practice wherein instead of looking for someone else to ‘take the ball’ I rather read/hear the person’s words and see how can I best assist and support myself to understand the person and so be able to in turn support another within  placing myself in another’s shoes so to speak – which practically means living humbleness without expectations of ‘what the person should already know by now’ as we have proven ourselves as human beings that ‘lessons learned’ have come and gone and we have repeated the exact same mistakes, which shows then to what extent I have to remind myself that it isn’t as ‘easy’ to change or to expect change from others instead of first working with myself to ensure that I am in fact that point of change and the becomes the living example of how it is possible to walk with and support another as myself, regardless of ‘who’ that another is, ‘what’ they say or how they present themselves as I then recognize and realize at all times that ‘that another person is myself too.’ And this is the essential aspect of facing our equality: nothing of what exists in another is really ‘separate’ from myself, and so

I commit myself to live by the principle of really stopping any expectation upon another, any idea of ‘how another should be/act like/live by now’ within ideas, beliefs or perceptions of who I believe another to be – and instead focus on myself, on actually ensuring that I am not immediately diverting my attention to ‘another’ but to first and foremost focus on myself as it would be kind of pointless to try and ‘support another’ if I am reacting even in the most subtle ways.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to see my reaction as ‘disappointment’ but I realize that this would be like wearing a ‘good doer’ suit wherein it is  perceived as  more ‘benevolent’ to believe I experience disappointment upon myself and others upon who I created expectations about ‘who they are’ but  instead I recognize the ‘disappointment’ as the façade to create a form of victimization, because it’s seen with a ‘better light’ at the eyes of others, but in fact it was just an experience of giving  up, not knowing what to do/how to solve situations and problems wherein I then go into the experience of ‘I do not know what to do/what else to say’ and in doing so, rendering the situation, the person simply ‘gone’ and ‘obsolete’ – which is no different, once again to how we treat mentally ill people in our society, wherein because don’t take the time to walk with them, we simply locked them out, treat them as schizophrenics, paranoids with dissociative personalities and never have in fact taken the time to investigate what they represent as a part of ourselves, as the mind and so to not judge the person as the actual physical living flesh they are, but to simply learn to observe, to recognize the mind for what it is, and so be able to develop ways to assist and support oneself and others to best be able to walk through our mind and to always stick to principle instead of allowing personal vendettas or personal experiences and points taken personal from deviating ourselves from this process wherein for the first time we are doing what has never been done and what we as human beings don’t like doing which is: seeing ourselves as the mind, introspecting, self-investigating, which this includes not only ‘myself’ but also learning how to walk with others, their minds and configurations, to understand how and why they ‘came to be’ who they are as the mind and so never miss the point of realizing that no matter ‘how bad’ or how ‘evil’ I may perceive another, I am only judging another’s mind with my own mind which means that this is a point that obviously exists within me and here to self-forgive.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself for having harbored throughout many years the idea that because we are in this process, we simply do not ‘intend’ any ‘evil’ against one another, and so in this creating the assumption that because we understand principles, then it’s done, there’s no more frictions or conflicts, backchats beliefs toward one another, but this is simply not so. I’ve realized how much work it actually takes to really integrate this point of self-change and my point here to take self responsibility for is the experience of just projecting my own giving up to another as in ‘not knowing what else to do’ and seeing another as a ‘lost case’ instead of actually realizing that this mind /this person/this situation is actually a gift wherein I am demonstrating and mirroring back to myself where it is that I still have to work with within myself, within my mind, within my expectations and stopping them, within the memories that get activated within me whenever I have been throughout my life subject to any form of another’s mind projection as I see and realize that in the past I accepted and allowed this to affect ‘me’ because I then had no context or understanding of who we are as the mind and therefore

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to create the thought pattern of ‘humanity is evil’ when I was in elementary school and I was subject to bullying for being the ‘star of the class’ and have kids stop talking to me or telling me how they were going to ‘defeat me’ and ‘bring me down’ and ‘win over me’ wherein I created an extensive amount of stress, apprehension and general I could say depression at age 7-8 wherein I could not fathom why these kids that were supposed to be my friends, my classmates were ‘getting at me.’ In this, I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to go into the experience of ‘I rather just not be ‘as good as I’ve been’ so that ‘they’ can have the spot they want and ‘I’ stop being the problem for them’ – without realizing that in this I would have given up on myself and making their words a ‘reality’ as a point for me to make decisions based on what others think/believe/say about myself or toward ‘me.’ So I realized by support of my mother that that was not the way and that I simply didn’t have to ‘listen to others’ but still, this ‘spine’ that emerged from these situations and later on becoming more aware of how we operate toward another as human beings in this world, made me feel powerless toward ‘the evil’ in this world and the actual nastiness and secrecy and deliberate hate that exists between human beings, which is how I then created the experience of being ‘too sensitive’ to these things which is why I then became a ‘hard ass’ so to speak so as to be able to cope better with all of these experiences that I went through while growing up and ‘taking the heat’ of things, while seeing myself in a constant ‘battle’ so to speak, which is why I also developed this mentality of having to be on a ‘defense mode’ most of the times toward those that I perceive are ‘out to get me.’

I realize that this is the modus vivendi that we all have, and that I’m no different to any other individual and I bet we have all created and built up our ‘walls’ of defense so that no one can really ‘get us’ or get to see the actual vulnerability that we all have as human beings, because this is understood as an opportunity to abuse a form of trust, of intimacy and understanding – so I see that because I’ve done this myself, I’ve been there myself, I can then understand why in the mind we tend to automate defense-mode and ‘attack-modes’ toward one another in the belief that ‘we have to defend ourselves.’

The  only thing that requires to be ‘defended’ is who we are as ego, because Life is simply recognized and supported.  

 

 

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have re-enacted, re-experienced within myself the same experiences of shock, sadness, disbelief and mostly  helplessness toward others such as the memory when I saw my ‘friends’ in school talking to each other’s ears during lunchtime and looking at myself and when I tried to join them, they simply ignored me, which is when I decided that I would have to learn how to be alone – and in this, allowing this secrecy and these backchats and ‘conspiracies’ about me to get everyone in the group to ‘dislike me’ to define ‘who I would be’ toward everyone else which is how I then started developing a constant state of distrust, having very few people as ‘friends’ and generally toward human beings creating this general idea that ‘everyone is evil’ so I could not like or trust people easily, which in a way it was cool as I was seeing the nature of who we are as the mind – but the problem is that I took it personally and I believed that ‘the world was out to ‘get me down’’ and that people wanted ‘my position’ in school/in my life or that ‘wanted’ my life, which lead me to essentially have virtually no friends, specially no ‘female’ friends as I considered that it was easier to ‘get at me’ or get to ‘steal’ the people I liked or my friends – lol which my fear became somewhat true at some point – but I see that this is all just what I have created in my mind, as my memories that I’ve loaded based on that initial disbelief, sadness, helplessness toward others’ words and having taken them personally, and so as a ‘result’ simply managing to become a ‘tougher’ person which was nothing else but the expression I had to ‘pull out’ in order to defend myself and have ‘no one to fuck with me’ which of course is not the solution, as this ‘stance’ of self-defense or being in constant ‘vigilant’ mode also leads us to perpetuate the state of wars within and wars without.

 

So in this I realize that If I am in fact here to embody stability and harmony as myself and toward others, I have to first ensure that I am not conditioning my behavior based on ‘how others act’ and so ‘act as a response To Them’ as this would be then Re-acting, responding, replying, reminding myself ‘who I should be’ toward another based on memories, emotions, beliefs, expectations, assumptions  – all of which is of the mind and all of which I cannot trust when being here with another, reading/hearing/sharing words with another and so in this

I commit myself to ensure that whenever I read something that is directed towards ‘me’ and I perceive it as a form of attack or slander, I stop and I breathe. And I ensure that I am stable and that I am not rehashing my past memories and experiences of ‘not knowing how to deal with this attack’ as in primary school – but instead immediately ground myself within the realization that these words are coming from another mind as part of the mind that I am also existing as, and as such, reacting in any way with fears, judgments, emotions and beliefs is nothing else but perpetuating the problem = not taking self-responsibility for myself, therefore I direct myself then to take into consideration how can I best support that individual and do so the same way I would like it to be done to myself, and actually seeing or ‘reminding’ myself that that person is a part of me that I am here to support as I have vowed to do so for myself in this process.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within the façade that ‘everything should be fine’ because ‘there is no conflict’ and as such maintain this belief or experience of ‘everything is cool’ or ‘workable’ and whenever  a point of conflict emerges in my world and reality,  then I go into a form of ‘blame’ toward the person/point that emerged as ‘conflict’ for ‘disrupting the workable/agreeable situation’ which is in fact only pointing to myself where it is that I want to maintain a form of control over how I believe the situation should be, and how even if I have tried to ‘embrace conflict’ there was an expectation of such conflict being ‘solved’ already and so when the point repeats/reactivates I go into a helplessness state as in the belief of ‘this point/person/mind should have gotten it by now’ and so in this actually using  this backchat as an excuse to not FIRST of all look at why have I created such expectations upon ‘others’ instead of first pin pointing the reaction, the experience that leads me to create such backchat in the first place? Why have I accepted and allowed myself to dismiss this subtle reaction within ME and immediately shift it toward ‘another’ which implies a form of righteousness as well: I am right and the other is the one causing the conflict, which is in fact dodging /abdicating my own responsibility first and foremost. 

 

When and as I see myself having the backchat/assumption of ‘This person should have gotten it by now’ I stop and I breathe as I realize that in this I am immediately dodging my own reaction, my own expectations, my own beliefs upon that person/situation and the belief of ‘point being corrected/point is aligned/point will no longer repeat the pattern’ as I realize that in the mind everything that we have become throughout time is nothing else but a broken record where we repeat our same experiences from our very early memories in our lifetime, which I have seen and exposed for myself as well. Therefore I then commit myself to understand the person/situation, rather see what point is emerging now, what point is repeating, why and how can I best assist and support myself first to practice blaming or seeing ‘others’ as the problem, as I realize that obviously no matter how ‘subtle’ these reactions emerge within me, such words when directed as an expectation ‘toward another’ is indicating me that I first have to look within myself and see where I haven’t yet changed/aligned and corrected the point of reaction within myself, which is the whole point here of absolute self-responsibility and taking it all back to self.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into the denial of my own secret mind when judging secrecy based on others’ words/actions, without realizing that in this I am once again dodging the realization that everything that goes on in my mind is still somewhat ‘secret’ as in there being no other being but myself in my mind and so by judging/denying/pointing fingers at ‘secrecy’ I am in essence missing out the point that has actually enabled us all to become ‘fearful’ to things like mass surveillance and so forth, which is how we want to ‘keep things secret’ as in hidden agendas where one can still allow backchat and imaginations/fantasies for ‘good’ or ‘bad’ about others which is a form of abuse as I realize that I would certainly not want myself to be subject to or an object of someone else’s mind – so for this, it is to first of all understand that ‘who we are as the mind’ has been the epitome of secrecy, the secret mind as that aspect of ourselves that we have veiled from everyone else, wherein we usually paint a good picture of us while hiding the ‘actual truth’ of ourselves. And so the title of this is ‘the uncomfortable truth’ which is where we believe that we are ‘right’ in our minds, that we are the ones doing the proper assessments, without realizing that when we are in any way judging/blaming/dismissing or denying another as oneself, one is definitely becoming the source and origin of the problem itself, as in the mind nothing can be trusted, in the mind as an immediate and almost ‘quantum’ experience that comes into our physical bodies and permeates our ‘reasoning’ from which we create an immediate response/reaction toward another, is not to be trusted, it is to be actually Stopped, breathed through in order to then assess what is it that’s coming up within me, why am I having this experience in my physical body, and so not attempt to ‘reply’ or ‘react’ to another as a way to ‘prove wrong’ or ‘prove right’ but instead focus on how I can respond in a way wherein I am taking self-responsibility which means that

 

I commit myself to respond to another based on the consideration of themselves as myself, and so first ensuring that I am fully stable, not participating in any experience – and if I was, then I Refrain/stop myself from reacting in the moment – so that I can take the time to assess how it is best to assist and support another, instead of wanting to ‘teach a lesson’ or ‘remind’ another of something that I believe ‘should have been ‘gotten’ by now’ – which is another form of righteousness or superiority when it comes to ‘proving another wrong’ or proving that ‘the point has not changed’ as an excuse to ‘dismiss’ another, which would be like wanting to cut my own arm just because it doesn’t have the strength that I expected it to have, even if I haven’t actually done the necessary work/training to develop such muscle and ensure that I have done all that is required to, for example, have my arm have a particular strength to a particular task or ability in my physical body.

 

I realize that everything that we’ve done throughout our lives in this reality is to dismiss, deny, negate, discriminate, exile, marginalize everything and everyone that doesn’t comply or doesn’t ‘fall’ into the creation of a normalcy which can be of course quite deceptive if not all cards are on the table, which means if oneself hasn’t actually taken absolute responsibility for what one is doing/experiencing/believing and perceiving about others and or the reasons why I would want to not want to see/not want to face/exile or marginalize another within the belief that ‘there is no cure, there is no solution’ which all that comes to mind when writing these words is the image of doctors in mental institutions that keep patients sedated and fully controlled just because we’ve given up on understanding how they got to such mental condition – or with ‘criminals’ that are sentenced to death which is our easy way out in society to deal with our own consequences, to not have to ‘face the dangerous person’ but, really being foolish to not investigate HOW and WHY we have created such mental problems, such so-called ‘criminals’ and why even our definitions of mental illnesses and criminals have been so diminished in our ‘mind framework’ dismissing all of us really that still exist in our minds and that still participate in a world-system where we commit crimes against life as a collective by allowing the starvation and the marginalization of those that we have rendered ‘helpless’ and ‘poor’ and ‘eccentric’ and ‘mentally ill’ and so forth, which are all tags that we create to justify our inability to work with them/walk with them in order to get to point of stability – which, of course, won’t be an easy thing to do, but it is what I would like others to do toward myself if I was in such position/role of being the marginalized, the ‘ousted’ one or the rejected one, as I’ve certainly to some degree have faced such point myself so, I realize that that is what I want for myself and so I have to give it to others that are willing of course to support themselves back, as that’s the essential principle I commit myself to walk here: to support others the way that I would like to be supported myself.

 

I commit myself to stop all assumptions, all projections of ideas/beliefs and perceptions I have toward ‘others’ and ‘who they are’ or ‘Should be’ in my mind, and instead commit to live in the moment where words are assessed in the moment instead of carrying ‘past history’ of a person within myself as a recollection of ‘experiences’ toward ‘them’ to then decide ‘who I am toward the person’ as this is my own conditioning my own ‘program’ that I have to ensure is not interfering with my ability to support another as myself which begins by ensuring I am not tainting another’s words based on the past or ‘who I believe the person to be’ but rather work each time, anew, from the words  in the moment, no past, not future, just here.

 

 

I commit myself to live the word humbleness in practicality within the consideration of others as myself which implies placing myself in the shoes of another, understand ‘where they’re coming from’ ensuring I’m not taking their words/actions/thoughts personally, but that I am able to instead if I see myself able to understand the words, I can most certainly challenge and will myself to support another that I see is willing to support themselves too, as this is how I see that through supporting each other it is easier to face the points and patterns that still exist within ourselves, so this is to not see another through eyes of ‘how changed he/she should be by now’ but to simply work with what is here, no preconceptions, no expectations, no denials, no running away or dodging the point but facing it fully here as it is part of my reality, and that then is of course my responsibility to face as well.

 

I commit myself to live the word gentleness which is a very necessary aspect when it comes to my words and to ensure that I am not in any way creating a defense mode toward another or to prove ‘righteousness’ or want to ‘control’ a situation through any amount of force, as I realize that this is what I have judged from any form of ‘authority’ that I have experienced such form of ‘control’ form, which is nothing else but actual fear that attempts to keep things ‘stable’ instead of facing them and directing them as self – so I realize that in order to live Gentleness  I have to let go of any speck of fear that creates the ‘defense mode’ and so align my words to embody that gentleness, consideration and humbleness to understand another, to support another as I would like to be supported myself and so be willing to embrace all parts of what is here in this world as myself and as points that I require to face if I am in fact to ‘train’ myself to educate myself to support any other person in this world that wants to support themselves back.

 

Further reading:

254. Beautiful Enslavement and Control

 

 

Suggested places to understand more about how to embrace and support the nature of who we have become as our mind:

 

Demonology | Revealing the world of demons – Desteni

 

The History of Desteni and Demons – Part One – YouTube

 

 

 

 

 

To learn more about how to support yourself and another, share, walk with us and become part of the necessary liberation from fighting against each other and instead, become life:

 

• Desteni
• Desteni Articles
• Destonians
• Desteni Lite Process
• Desteni I Process
• Agreement/Redefining Relationship Course
• Desteni Forum
• Desteni Wiki
• Desteni Español
• Creation’s Journey to Life
• Heaven’s Journey To Life
• 7 Year Journey To Life Process

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  

403. How to Stop Living in Defense Mode

I have previously discussed how it is that we condition ourselves to create/put on a hard veneer in order to – let me be frank – not be fucked with/bullied/attacked by others and how this becomes like a second skin growth to actually make up for an initial experience of being vulnerable or having felt attacked by others words/actions. Here we can see how we condition each other to be constantly expecting the worst from one another, and so becoming the ‘fighters’ in the battlefield that we’ve created of our lives.

There are various reasons for this, one can be survival which is the way we have conditioned ourselves, our human nature to be guarding our own interest out of fear of others taking it away or abusing each other to get the most with the least effort etc. Another one is more related to that ‘attack’ that exists as a violent action toward one another, verbally/psychologically speaking while at the same time having the possibility to escalate to become physical as well. This is how I could see that we begin ‘corrupting’ ourselves0 when taking each others words personally, as a ‘personal attack’ and so create it in the form of bullying or ‘trollism’ as it exists now.

Here I’ll focus on a rather simply form in which I’ve noticed my own ‘defense-mode’ and what are the reasons for it. I’ve been actively participating in answering/interacting on YouTube and forums wherein I have had one of the most vivid evidences of how we can attack each other just for the sake of winning a ‘battle’ in our minds, just for the sake of ‘being right’ and making one another look like ‘an ass’ because ‘they are wrong’ and so in essence co-creating  just another virtual battlefield to breed human hatred or perpetuate the ‘Divide and Conquer’ mind frames which I initially would react to in an emotional way upon reading such denigrating, defaming,, spiteful, violent and even life threatening comments we would get on a daily basis as a result of what we publish, which is all about life in equality, living rights, what is best for everyone, etc.

So, looking back,  this is what I see as a cool ‘training ground’ when it comes to facing the REAL human nature and not only see the one I had believed in  – such as the good nature one – while being locked in my ‘home bubble’ and my limited environment with limited interactions, where I yes certainly did face bullying and backstabbing from ‘friends’ at an early age, prompting me into quite a ‘depression ‘ at the age of 7, 8 because of not being able to fathom such ‘harm’ imposed toward me from another at first, until I had the support from my mother to realize I did not have to take others words/actions personally – which was great support and led me to become rather independent from sheeple mentality while going through school. I did, however, become somewhat defensive in my personality, I could say that yes I had clear principles but a lot of it was also from the starting point of showing ‘others’ that ‘you can’t mess around with me,’ it worked to a certain extent – but what happens when that ‘veneer’ becomes ‘who you are’ and how one dictates one’s every interaction?

 

I see that the defense-mode that I am able to act out upon in one moment actually stems from acting once again based on past experiences/memories where I still place myself in such ‘defense mode’ meaning being ready to be ‘attacked’ from the moment that I, for example,  read a YouTube comment and so, instead of unconditionally reading the words that a person is placing, I already see where I can ‘find the point they are missing out on’ or what they are ‘defending’ or where they are trying to ‘prove me wrong, so that I can ‘point it out back’ and so this is something that I became used to do back in the day where we were certainly first becoming more aware of what each person implied in their words, which has been supportive nonetheless. But I see that I require to now and from here on step down from continuing that mechanism/way; this actually happened to me yesterday where I did thankfully get feedback from the person that I replied to on YouTube saying: “Marlen? I commented because you right on the money!  Thank You!”  The first word as my name with a question mark implying that they probably didn’t understand why I had replied in such a ‘harsh’ manner. And so I realized that I had come through toward him in the same old ‘attack-mode’ and ‘defense-mode’ instead of just seeing where the person is coming with the comment, what I can agree on as that’s our common ground and then expanding a bit on it without having the starting point of ‘proving him wrong’ or judging his very reply for not considering all points that I see but simply focusing on what I can do to assist and support to expand on the points brought up and create a conversation from there.

Assist and support here are the key points, not to ‘defend my point’ or ‘defend my cause’ because that’s what creates the battlefield on YouTube, but rather keeping it simple when answering back and inviting the person to continue the dialogue instead of wanting ‘them’ to ‘change’ all of a sudden toward Me and what I have to say, as that would be me as ego wanting validation/acceptance from others right away. The same point applies when I have deemed others as being ‘defensive’ toward me and so judging others as ‘being on defense mode’/being on attack-mode but it is really only me projecting my perception upon them because I’ve ‘been there/done that too.

 

So the key here is to then when and as I see myself reading comments, reading/hearing another’s words, I assist and support myself to not go into the predisposition of fighting/ attacking another based on the belief/assumption that ‘they are here to attack me first’ and so, instead allow me to read the comment/words unconditionally, without expectations or already ‘sharpening my knife’ to ‘get back at them,’ as I see that within this starting point I perpetuate the conflict and not allow myself to be really HERE with/as the words written/spoken and so be able to interact/reply back within the consideration of what I can learn from what the person is explaining, what I can learn from them, where I see that I agree upon to also reply back and letting the person know I also see that/agree with it.

This implies: Seeing where there is a point where I can share from my own realizations, self investigations and not only from knowledge and information, all of this within the consideration of placing myself in another’s shoes, taking into consideration the words in one YouTube comment, one email, one conversation and ‘walking with’ to expand on a point of cognitive dissonance, misinformation, belief, or an emotional reaction to the points explained, so that I can also point it out in a considerate non-defensive, non-attacking, non-aggressive manner which means explaining to another a point the same way I would want another to explain it to me: with patience, with humbleness and gentleness so as to be able to let the other person know that I do stand as these principles I talk about at all times, this is who I am and this is the consideration, care, gentleness and humbleness toward others that I commit myself to live by when interacting with them, so as to not come through as ‘me having the truth’ or ‘me having to be always right’ but being also willing to see my faults, my mistakes, where I reacted to another’s words and so take responsibility for such reactions myself.

 

So to not go into ‘denial’ of my actions, which is what the vlog was about in fact wherein I received such comment, here I stand directive of such point which opened up yesterday and so I am directing it here, as I see that if I want to create a world of transparency, integrity and trust, I have to be doing just that myself, seeing, realizing, understanding my mistakes, my reactions, investigate where they ‘come from,’ understand them, self forgive them and most importantly, give myself a new direction as to how I am going to be living these corrections from now on whenever I interact with another.

 

 

Self Forgiveness and Self Correction

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a predisposition of ‘having to defend myself’ when replying to YouTube Comments or replying to others’ words whether written or in a conversation, instead of realizing how I perpetuate my own memories of the past and even from my childhood of how I had to be ‘wary’ of people’s words and actions toward me, which is why I became ‘edgy’ as well, not being able to trust others and as I’ve explained before, this is not about ‘trusting others’ but rather trusting me in being able to read/hear words in stability and be able to support myself unconditionally to interact, reply back within the consideration of what is self-supportive both for ‘them’ and ‘myself’ as two or more individuals establishing a communication and settling the way to create a point of communal understanding – not fighting or ‘proving each other right/wrong’

 

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to realize how I am in fact perpetuating the current status quo in our relationships where we have focused so much on the winner/loser mentality, the ‘attacker’ and the ‘attacked,’ the bully and the bullied and where we believe that we constantly have to be ‘defending’ ourselves which can only exist if we are ‘coming from’ a starting point of ego as in seeing others as enemies, as ‘the problem,’ as ‘the ignorant ones and oneself being the ‘right one,’ through which we approach another from the vantage point of seeing another as inferior to myself and so believing that I have to ‘educate them’ with ‘what I know’ instead of being actually grateful that there are people that are still willing to reply in a comment to a YouTube video and so be able to hear/get to know what others’ perspectives on a subject and learn from it, see where we still have to ‘align’ our understanding, what are the main points where there is still a point tampering self-realization,  as well as being willing to correct ourselves if necessary and in the possible measure, being able to support and assist another to expand themselves a bit more – maybe point out some aspects they can do further investigation on, other blogs or vlogs to watch/read and so not immediately ‘showing the way out’ when the entire starting point of commenting by the other individual is to precisely establish communication and be able to continue it in the best possible way.

I realize that in our world nothing will be changing if we do not first focus on being able to get to hear /read one another, see where there is a common ground and build it from there, thus no longer existing in the ‘I’ll prove you wrong’ mentality.

 

I also realize that I have to be aware of not seeing myself as ‘the victim’ that is going to be ‘abused/attacked by others’ as in this position of victimization I then justify my ‘getting back at’ others as in ‘having to defend myself’ which is why in this world we, for example, allow the use and existence of guns, because we give into this mentality that ‘I have to protect myself, I have to be armed’ without first investigating why and what causes this abuse in the first place.

 

I realize that I have to stop projecting my past, and my ‘mind-frame’ that I had built around ‘commenting on YouTube’ as in ‘getting myself  into a battlefield’ and instead, read the comments from the starting point of being able to support myself, to learn from another, to see where I can improve my communication, identify and recognize where I wasn’t clear/what I missed and so expand through this communication instead of already wanting to ‘end’ the interaction by placing a comment that could be seen as ‘sparking up reactions’ which previously I had defined as supportive for the person to ‘face themselves’ but, we are in a different stage in our process so I now apply the point of being gentle and supportive with others, the same way that I would like a ‘stranger’ on YouTube to reply to my messages and comments as well, doing to another what I would like to be done unto in the same situation and in all cases for that matter.

 

I commit myself to use the opportunity of interacting with others either through comments on a website, on a forum, on every day conversations/interactions so that I can expand and support myself while at the same time assisting and supporting another, because it is in these seemingly ‘irrelevant’ or ‘small moments’ that actual windows of opportunity exist to ‘connect’ to others and let them also realize that there are solutions, there are people that do not fall into the usual patterns of the divide and conquer mentality, and so this is what I commit myself to living in all aspects of my everyday living and interactions with people from around the globe through the marvelous platform that the Internet is.

 

I commit myself to redirect my judgments upon others being ‘in a defense mode’ and instead be able to in such moments immediately take the point back to self and direct myself toward another in a way wherein I can apply consideration, humbleness, gentleness to place myself in their shoes so that I am able to best support them and expanding ourselves through using words or even behavior, voice tonality that indicates in stability that I am here, I hear you, I understand you, let’s clarify this/let’s expand on this/ have you considered this point about this that you mentioned here? so that it is and becomes a more ‘inviting’ way to continue interacting with another.

 

I commit myself to walk through my own ‘predisposition’ of being in this ‘defense-mode’ so that I can stand here, clear, open, available and willing to communicate and direct another’s questions and sometimes even curiosity and not fall into the ‘attacking-mode’ but to genuinely be able to consider their starting point and so walk-with, instead of walking-against others.

 

I commit my self to live the realization that ‘the enemy’ is really myself and my own assumption, my own mind, my own projections which means that in practicality I am then going to be open to read/hear words without going into reaction, without already ‘preparing’ my artillery to shoot with a barrage of points that have nothing to do with what was initially said either, but to also keep it simple and ‘grow’ the conversation from there.

 

I commit myself to only reply to comments/written and spoken interactions when I have given myself a ‘moment of clarity’ which means when I have breathed and ensured that I am in fact stable, here, that I am taking responsibility for my initial reactions or starting point toward another, and so be more open, willing and available for genuine communication, ensuring I have no interference/noise as my own reactions preventing me from hearing/reading another unconditionally.

 

I commit myself to ‘take back to self’ any judgments I may had toward ‘others’ as ‘them being the attackers’ or ‘them being in a defense-mode’ as in fact, that would mean me reacting in ego towards ego – lol – so the best way to interact with another is to work with the common sense of looking at words themselves, no assumptions, rather asking what they in fact mean if the point is not clear, but generally not jumping into assumptions, not taking my own knowledge, my own ego into consideration when interacting with others, as that’s where the shifts happen and the divide and conquer mentality is re-created, wherein I perceive that another is ‘not the same as myself’ and so I have to ‘prove them wrong’ according to me, which is where the problem exists.

So I instead commit myself to focus on directing the words, the comments, the situation for what it is, devoid of past grudges, preconditioning, preprogramming of ‘how I deal with others that I perceive are attacking me’ as I then live the realization that the ‘attack’ only exists in my mind as memories and experiences that I create when I take another’s words personally or as ‘going against me’ which is the ego-starting point of reading/hearing another, when we ‘take it personally’ instead of realizing that each one’s words relate to oneself only, and so I take self-responsibility.

 

I commit myself to in fact become a pillar of support for myself and others which means I cannot judge, I cannot avoid another or see them as ‘less than myself’ or as ‘ignorant’ but instead assist and support myself and others to transcend such limitations of the mind to work with what we have as our statements, see what we can agree upon and expand it from there, as Self Support.

 

So instead I am grateful that this point opened up so I could see what I was doing in this interaction and so be able to give it direction here for once and for all – so, thanks Tyler.

 

7.      Living the Principle of Self Awareness – to be aware, to see, to recognize my own thoughts and Mind, to be self honest to the extent where I can take responsibility for when I see my thoughts / Mind is not what is best for me / others and commit to immediately take responsibility and change for myself and so for others The Desteni of Living – My Declaration of Principle

 

 

To learn more about taking responsibility for one’s mind, one’s reactions, please visit the following sites and join us in our endeavor too:

• Desteni
• Desteni Articles
• Destonians
• Desteni Lite Process
• Desteni I Process
• Agreement/Redefining Relationship Course
• Desteni Forum
• Desteni Wiki
• Desteni Español
• Creation’s Journey to Life
• Heaven’s Journey To Life
• 7 Year Journey To Life Process

400. How to Best Contribute to Each Other’s Lives?

 

How many times do we actually wake up considering: How am I going to support myself and others today? Well, I bet not as often as we in fact should, yet if we all began applying such starting point for ourselves as part of ‘who we are/what we do’ in our day to day living, we would have an actual genuine revolution from the moment that the benefits of coexisting within such principle would most likely create as a result of it doing just that: a world that is best for everyone.

 

Today I did the usual when going out for walk while going through various grocery stores buying my food and then I went to the place that I’ve been going to lately to get my ‘special recipe’ vegetables and nuts drink. I buy it at a relatively new small restaurant run by a family serving mostly what is called ‘healthy foods.’ I made the decision from the moment I saw it open that I would go there and ask them if I could get my ‘custom made’ juice, which they agreed to, and I simply saw that they were affable and asked them how long they had been running their business etc. the basics to get to know more about them as I kind of knew I would be going there quite often.

It’s cool when you find a place where you can ask for ‘your drink’ being it so that I do not fancy bars or alcohol any longer to have ‘such experience’ but instead I go get my ‘healthy drink’ from there lol here. Throughout this past month when going there I would briefly chit chat the usual here and there about the weather and how their business was doing and some recipes etc. Though today casually just one month after first meeting them, we kind of went through the barrier of just being the customer/service provider relationship so to speak and this happened in a rather casual way, but certainly it was all based on Me taking the decision to just express in a moment.

 

So they usually have their younger kids there and one of the girls had a knot in her hair and not enjoying her mother disentangling it. In that moment I simply expressed to them how that seemed such a ‘past story’ to me since I would also get very big knots at times and how I no longer have to be worrying about that – lol – so it seems that was me opening a door to say ‘more’ than the usual and specially related to me not having hair, they finally felt probably more at ease to ask me about my no-hair style and so yes I explained it was entirely my decision and explained some of the reasons why I do it – comfort, a decision I took in a moment of my life to stand up what’s best for me, for life and to live that support for myself – and obviously the benefit that comes with it when it comes to time, care etc.  So the man/ father then asked me what is it that I did/ what do I dedicate myself to since he and his wife had been curious about me, probably because of the no-hair or who knows but I ended up sharing what I dedicate my self to in terms of being a supporter of human development to integrate living principles that aren’t taught in schools and that are very much required in this world if we really want to change it, while applying them myself and in essence being ‘rattling the cages of the caged’ which I came to understand for a while now that that was the point in my life to be and do as well to instigate for those that can hear to also consider what’s possible in our world-life if we all start considering each other as equals and do to another as we would like to be done onto.

I explained to them how I studied visual arts having an idea of maybe hitting the ‘good life’ and becoming some kind of an artist/star and be able to influence others to ‘change the world,’ but then one year into my career I found this organization and people around the world that completely changed my life and so I had to ask myself what I saw as a priority when it comes to my life, what I wanted to spend my time on: either creating artworks or dedicating myself to my own creation, to straighten/align myself so that I could be and become an example of what genuine change implies in practical manners in this world. I chose the latter, and yes it came with the ‘breakdown’ of myself as my ego, my desires which I absolutely personally took the decision do in my life. And here just for clarification purposes, no I am not saying that ‘to walk this process you need to give up ‘your life’’ or what you desire to do, this is just what I saw was pertinent in my case.

From the moment I encounter the Desteni material it didn’t take long for me to think these exact same words ‘I want to work with them’ and from that moment on I simply applied myself to support with what I could at the time, transcribing material, studying it and getting to read more and more of the forum. I knew I was going to be ‘in it’ for life and so when I came to decide what I wanted to be doing, the decision was easier as I had also realized the starting point of my career pretty much based on the creation of my ego with no real foundation, so I didn’t quit, I walked it through but certainly realizing that my point in this life is to apply myself in this process of self change and be directly a point of support for others, which in this process it means living and applying the words I preach so to speak, being an example that I can see for and within myself I would like others to consider as a possibility and potential that exists within us all – not ‘as me’ but as the process of self-change and its possibilities when applied by each one of us individuals around the world.

I’ve pushed myself to take these points of responsibility throughout time, walking slowly but surely throughout a series of insecurities, denials of my potential, believing that ‘others could do it better’ and that I wasn’t ‘ready enough’ and certainly this is not something you are immediately ‘ready-for,’ it takes time and self-application, consistency, dedication but mostly to remain self-honest within the starting point of supporting others which means: I support others within the realization that in doing this, I am supporting myself too, not to ‘be better than’ but to empower each other equally, which is the first point I see is necessary if we ever truly want to live the actual ‘power for the people.’

So I shared all of this to the couple that runs the natural foods restaurant and so upon this, I usually do say to everyone that asks and is interested in it, that I am here if they would like to ever share something, get some perspectives as ‘that’s my job’ so to speak.And they did, they shared how one of their sons is quite analytical and critical about society, but is growing more and more angry and frustrated for not knowing ‘what to do’ to ‘change the world so to speak.’ And of course, I said I’ve been there, done that myself and so how I am available if they see it would be cool to have a chat with him. I consider that there is nothing more ‘rewarding’ than being able to communicate with other individuals at this level, with such ease, such openness and all of it formed by a series of decisions I made to also frequent buying there as I do truly appreciate the fact that they have decent prices, quality products and are a family running it, not a large corporation having people doing it for them.  I appreciate someone that can make a living by selling and promoting supportive and healthy food to eat than someone earning millions being a corporate manager in Mcmeals Inc., not to diminish them, it’s simply being rather self-aware of the support required in our foods and this business run by the couple/family is the kind of businesses I would like to see more often as well for the betterment of our eating habits too.

Anyways to not make the whole deal long, it was also very interesting how as I started sharing how I not only dedicate myself to this process of supporting myself and others but investigating solutions for the world system as well. So, the guy said how he had been pondering Why does royalty exist? And yes, now we have something to thank for to the abdicated royal in Spain, having people questioning the existence of ‘royals.’ So I shared a bit on the history of that and we continued talking about the corruption in government, the pedophilia that runs in our government – which is quite well known unlike other places – the freemasons, the elite schools, the standardization of education, pop culture, Disney and the indoctrination of little boys and girls into an early sexualization, the disruption of families, parenting, oh yes parenting which is the main point that we discussed and how important it is also to become an example to the children, and how their very own relationship will become the ‘model’ or example for their children to recreate and how every word, every action mattered when it comes to being the example. 

The point that worried them the most is not knowing what to exactly do with one of their sons and I explained how I have walked that road exactly. I was highly, highly critical about the world around me – always looking at everything with disgust, even hatred when it came to the church, politics and every other rich person I saw as a culprit for ‘where we are now.’ In essence, I was always blaming  ‘everyone’ in a position of ‘power’ around me instead of actually realizing I was going to get myself nowhere if I remained in such antagonistic stance. This remained like that until I started realizing the ‘role’ I was playing as in wanting change and wanting to get it done outside of myself – but never really consider it was me that had to become such example myself, within myself first.

The revolutionary thing within Desteni is that we become the actual living proof of what changing your life actually in fact means/implies and ‘looks like’ – obviously not physically but practically speaking of. As I’ve said some other times before, who knows where I would have been right now if I had continued trying to evade my reality and evolving my ego… I am so glad I stopped myself from going literally down that path as I’ve seen in others where it took them and I am certainly in no way regretting the choices I’ve made when they’ve been made in order to support myself. At first it does seem like a ‘big change’ and as these guys said as well, it IS rather difficult to change oneself and also how to live in a society where you have to ‘swim against the tide.’ I explained that certainly at first it was quite a ‘tough time’ but how now it is simply who I am and what I do/live by now and so it’s not any longer something ‘separate’ from me but who I am, it’s become ‘natural’ in a way, which they also confirmed when they explained their perception of myself, including my rather ‘non usual’ look lol. Of course this is not the ‘absolute’ but certainly I do have to be able to recognize that I experience myself mostly stable and that any point that ‘makes me feel uneasy’ it’s just something I cannot stand for that long, I simply start investigating what I did, said, read, didn’t do or felt about something/someone and so see it for what it is. So this means that I no longer can experience myself in a constant ‘state’ or ‘experience’ for that long as I used to before, because now I do direct myself to sort myself out/ to align myself, just because it is so easy to notice when something ‘rocks my waters’ so to speak, and so yes this general stability is what I also see is more of a physical presence that I can then decide to express I an certain manner to interact with others.

I shared with them that a great benefit from this process is how one ‘gains’ stability, recognizes one’s own ability to change, develops ones own potential, breaks through any pre-determined/limited ideas of ‘what I should be and do as I then focus on my own expansion, breaking through the patterns of the past which have gotten us to the point we are living in now: absolute enslavement as there is really no other word to describe it. We’ve always been slaves in fact, but now it’s just less covered by nicely painted facades.

 

One aspect that they mentioned about their son which I also can relate to relate to, is how the ideals of a ‘better life’ are created like for example pondering the American or European living standards as ‘the best’ – this is obviously coming from us living in Mexico. I remember this very well too, I used to – believe it or not – also ponder America as this ‘great place’ for some 7 years in my life and dreaming about going there, as well as Germany.  I got rather confused at seeing the evil behind such perceived ‘beauty’ and the kind of ‘art’ that was in fact existent there which was all created based on ideas about power, abuse, gods, reptiles, death and everything that can mean the reverse of life and most likely done by slave-labor work for the ‘less fortunate ones’, so I also then shared how I had to debunk my own ‘ideals’ of what a ‘good life’ currently means and seeing how it was in fact constructed upon, which led me to debunk my delusions of grandeur when it comes to understanding a ‘first world nation’ and instead, being able to understand a ‘first world nation’ in reverse when it comes to measuring this world in self-honesty: the richest are the most abusive, and so I could no longer revere and ‘admire’ any form of royalty, power, exuberance and so-called progress. It’s all been based on abuse so that is there to actually admire there? I certainly got my own understanding on this later in this process when getting to understand the actuality of ‘first world countries’ and the most ‘powerful currencies’ around the world, which I could only then make sense of through this ingrained pattern and program to seek for power, seek for more, seek to dominate and control, just for the sake of the experience thereof. This is the human nature that we have existed as thus far which is the same human nature that can be changed if we actually want to see a change in this world.

What I shared with these guys was in a considerate manner, not just ‘spilling the beans’ for the sake of it, but seeing how much they were also ‘willing’ to hear based on their questions, what they were interested in getting to know about and so we probably talked about over 2 hours which I had never thought of doing and opening points ‘that far’ with people that I do‘not know’ from other relatives or friends of friends type of situation, which is rather cool because this is what we can probably do more often as well, opening up with the people we ‘buy’ things from or that are in our neighborhoods and besides supporting them with spending our money there – instead of buying some crappy food for some Mr. McRich, I rather support local small businesses that sell quality healthy food and earn a decent living by doing their meals with the necessary care that they also eat from.

Now this is what I support as well when it comes to buying that which others also sell with the intention of selling something that is beneficial for ourselves, and it is also nice to be able to now open up with them and see how cool It is to see that they are actually quite ‘open minded’ as well and receptive to living principles which they already have to a certain extent so, I’m glad and more than willing to support others that are open and willing to support themselves too – this is what I am here for, this is what I could say I was ‘born’ to do and it’s a rather rewarding and enjoyable too when I can talk to people at length about this, and being genuinely interested because it is in fact what we can all relate to as well, it is what ‘we do’ as human beings. So there’s really No excuse to not have a topic of conversation with any human being, regardless of them being willing to ‘hear and apply it for themselves’ or not. I’ve realized that my point is not to ‘show others’ but to simply live this for myself and so instead have people then asking opening up as I have made the first move to ‘open up’ until one gets to this point in a conversation of  asking for perspectives or wanting to know ‘what I think about…’ and so through sharing perspectives already being opening further points for others to consider too. In the end they were quite grateful for the chat and it’s these moments that certainly can make a greater impact into each other’s lives.

 

A process I can also share of is the one with my parents who actually are quite supportive of myself and my process, being aware of what I do, what I research about myself, the world system etc. Before I was not able to talk to them for a long time. I treated them as ‘my parents’ and so kept the relationship at distance after having had the typical troubled teenage years of getting to dislike them because of them not approving of my friends/relationships and so gathering a certain amount of resentment to which I then started to ‘rebel against’ never realizing it was all done to myself any ways – which I of course came to realize through walking Mind Constructs.
So after all these years of also getting them used to me calling them by their name, we’ve gotten to  have a cool communication where I can keep seeing and identifying my own experiences toward them, any reactions or such – but mostly I keep looking within myself to see where I can spot my own patterns in them and so whenever I can, assist and support them to to open up and see what is is that might be occupying their mind, that is bothering them etc. I have also then been able to learn from them, get to know more about their childhood, how their parents treated them, their own relationships with their parents, their ‘fuckups’ and so forth – I mean it has been quite a healthy process too whereas before I would simply not even talk to them about topics I thought they weren’t interested too. So I also should say that it took a process as well, because the first time I stalked lol ‘talked’ to them about Desteni, my father got so annoyed about me just blurting this information out that he told me he didn’t want to hear anything about it any longer, which I then at such incipient time in my process took it very personal and secluded myself from everyone and everything, something that I recommend Not doing and if I can prevent anyone from doing so, please take it into consideration. We cannot just think that by shutting all our relationships we will ‘walk process better’ – it’s in fact the opposite.

 

So after all these  years I’ve been able to genuinely say ‘I enjoy going out with my parents’ and having them be opening up as well to everything I have to share while also joking about their own reactions and seeing ‘where it comes from’ and identifying each other’s patterns based on how I am in fact ‘their copy’ lol. So, that’s something I have certainly also seen as my point of extending support to others too, who are also the beings that brought me into this world so it is cool to be able to support them back this way, even to the point of getting to talk more about this process with some of their friends, which was also cool and another point of ‘extending the support onto others’ that want to support themselves too.

 

I have also lived by the principle of assisting others the way I would like to be supported. I have been participating in forums, writing, public online discussions, assisting people on a one on one basis within the Desteni I Process where through discussing about this reality we can get to support each other to realize points we hadn’t realized yet, and that’s also what’s so valuable about places like YouTube too, where everyone can publish anything as a statement of ‘this is my contribution to the world’ – I am  thankful for everyone that has made videos, documentaries, vlogs and discussions on points that I have learned from and beginning to apply for myself. Gee, who would I be/would we be without the internet and YouTube?  probably a more intricate evolved model of slaves.

 

Ok, so, I share this day as a glimpse of how through walking this process of self-support one can also open one’s door to share, communicate with others based on the sheer fact of being human beings and speaking the same language in this case. It certainly does create an opening to have people become aware of ways they can support themselves, but it’s not a necessity either. I can speak to people that believe in positive thinking, magic, gods or else and still have a point to communicate about where I simply share my considerations and perspectives about any topic and so through that then open up points that others can decide to further communicate about or not –the point is then not about ‘them hearing’ but me being able to share  with others regardless of ‘their intention’ or else. It’s all about who I am when sharing with others, having the principle before all and have no hidden agendas either  – being frank yet also cautious as to not attack or say something that they can be reactive toward, so measuring my words according to what they also go opening up for themselves.

 

This is then a series of examples that I can tell I have applied to when it comes to the following principle:

 

With taking responsibility for myself, becoming aware of myself – take responsibility and become aware of others in my life, to assist and support them as I am assisting and supporting myself – to give as I would like to receive and do the extra bit every day to see where I can contribute to other’s lives and so my own

 

I can self-honestly say that that ‘extra bit’ every day is not yet fully here as myself, so I do have to see where I can generate more ‘openings’ where I expand and actually establish communication with others, instead of expecting people to just ‘knock on my door’ so to speak.

If all of us did this, we would start seeing how our lives get a new meaning from – as an example but not limited to –  strictly mercantile relationships to actually seeing each other as human beings, for example – and actually considered as a genuine source of change and support. , as it would be then us straightening the very relationships I have toward others.

 

In this case it’s very simple, a certain gratefulness emerges as I have now also ‘offered’ to support them and share with them from ‘what I do’ as they also then provide me a service that I am also quite thankful of based on what they do, how they do it and the care and quality to it. Now imagine how things can be in this world if we all give the best of ourselves to each other – why waiting for freaking ‘holidays’ for spreading some phony idea of ‘love’ and ‘brotherhood’ when  every single day could be a holiday  if we all put in our ‘little grain’ or seed to make our lives be improved for all parties involved. Well, it is not a fantasy to say: things would change for the better, as it can be in fact be done in reality within the seemingly ‘small’ points, but one thing is certain: we cannot fully measure ‘what will emerge’ from these moments, all that we can know is that it is one little step for oneself, but possibly a huge one for man to get to be kind again.

 

So: How to best contribute to each other’s lives? By living the principle of first stabilizing and supporting myself to genuinely be able to say ‘I support you the way I would like to be supported in self honesty’ which means in consideration of you and I being in fact equal and one and aiming to live in a way that is best for all.

 

 

 

Thanks to everyone  at the Farm in South Africa, from where I  learned and got to apply these living principles for the first time among a group of people.

 

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