Category Archives: respect
Sometimes I hold myself back from writing because of perceiving that my topics are usually the same, about the same points that I seem to be constantly facing or working on. However, I also realized that this is something I write for sharing yes, but ultimately also as a point of accountability when it comes to the points that I’ve been facing.
So, there’s a main point related to listening. This is mainly in relation to how I’ve created filters in relation to how I decide to listen to someone, mostly imposing my own views, judgments – positive and negative – upon listening to someone, even more so if that someone is someone that is close to me, such as my partner.. and I am quite grateful that I’ve been able to discuss and open up all of these things to realize how much of a stubborn I’ve been in fact, and how much of the disdain, criticism and judgment I held toward my grandmother and mother about being control freaks and stubborn people relates back to me to the exact degree. Yep! It’s a frightening realization because at least my mother and I have realized the very consequential outflows of it, but now that I see the extent in which I am following ‘the same steps’ my female predecessors have played out with themselves, their bodies and towards their partners, I have a unique opportunity to change and ‘stop the sins of the fathers’ in this case, the mothers to be exact.
I am also aware that not everyone is able to have a direct cross-reference of this with their parents. Some don’t have their parents around and live far away, some have died already, some have never gotten to know their parents. This situation has led me to also appreciate the unique set up I was born into and be in a way grateful that I have this kind of cross-reference. However this doesn’t mean that if someone doesn’t have their parents or grandparents around you don’t get to know ‘how’ they are… just a look within self and you’ll get the gist of it. Lol
Anyways, getting to the bottom of this. I was quite shocked about myself – but also not really, because hello? I am in my own body and mind – in relation to how I’ve decided to not take certain feedback seriously about things and situations where I am being too over-bearing, obtuse, imposing, dictatorial and a plain control freak. I had expressed before how I was grateful to have this kind of feedback in the moment from my partner, but the reality is that I wasn’t honoring it as a point of self-change. I was only getting to KNOW and become Aware of the thing, but I wasn’t in fact deciding to fully change it.
Why? How come that if I was getting the direct feedback in the moment I wasn’t doing something about it? Well, I recently discovered quite an awful conditioning within me as well. When my partner was giving the feedback, there was no ‘raising of voices’ or showing any emotional outburst about it, in essence, there wasn’t a ‘big deal’ made out of it in my head. This is something I can relate to when one is a child, and one gets these warnings of things that may go wrong, or when one is doing something that one ‘shouldn’t do’ but only getting to stop doing it IF seeing the parent go completely upset and raise their voice and be noticeably annoyed, bothered, angry and really creating this emotional show where I would then realize ‘oh shit, that’s a real problem, I need to stop.’
This is where learning to listen comes in and where I also require to integrate the fact that this feedback I was receiving in the moment wont’ come with emotional outbursts for me to ‘take it seriously.’ In fact I was doing exactly what I would be bothered by for most of my life in relation to my mother, where I would say things to her or would like to ‘have a serious talk’ but she has a tendency to be quite ‘light’ about some things, not take things that seriously, not give them the ‘weight’ I was expecting and in doing so, I believed I wasn’t being taken seriously, it would piss me off, lol. So! It shouldn’t be as surprising that I was doing the exact same thing, almost going into that ignoring or ‘not taking seriously’ what my partner was sharing in those moments, and I just simply would not make any effort to change things, well a bit I guess, but that was entirely half-assed and not really living a decision to change in the moment.
How did I become aware of it? Of course when things get to a certain ‘boiling point’ where I repeat the same pattern, once again, and then I get reminded how I’ve gotten to hear the feedback about that situation several, several times before and I just haven’t listened. Yep, that was a bit of a shameful situation for me because in that moment I realized how much I was truly not deciding to listen as in taking the feedback in, and acknowledging that ‘ok yes I need to do something about this and create a plan to Change.’ I just ‘heard’ it and let it go by, really. And this is how I came to see how little importance or ‘weight’ so to speak I gave to this kind of feedback which in fact is precisely what I require to become aware and so change a very ingrained pattern I’ve lived when it comes to in essence being ‘control’ in a dictatorial and imposing way.
After that day, what I’ve been doing is then challenging the comfort I’ve created to ‘totally be me’ as the control freak with my partner, which is in a way cool because he now knows me and understands how far it can get, which is obviously not cool. And now I had to explain how this is one of the points that surely, is a difficult one for me, that I appreciate the feedback, that I am sorry that I haven’t changed yet in spite of the feedback and that I am now committing to change it.
What has happened a few days after that serious talk is that I’ve been now catching myself more often when I would say things out of habit that are in the same ‘tune’ of being a control freak. Sometimes I’ve been saying it and I’ve stopped myself from saying ‘but why not!?’ lol when wanting something to be done in a particular way that I had already been explained why it could not go that way. This is the stubbornness that I’ve also realized comes from an aloof sense of listening, where I get the explanation about certain things and then I decide to ‘not listen’ or comfortably ‘forget’ which I mean, it’s really a pain in the ass having to be told the same things over and over again, which I am not getting to properly integrate because I am not properly listening, but only being calculating in my mind what I want to hear, what I want to filter out in order to have some sort of very twisted comfort zone to not have to change ‘my ways.’
Needless to say that I realize how difficult it can be for any person to deal with someone like me, really, and not to make me a very tough person to deal with. But when it comes to living together and having the total openness to be ME then, all the real and nitty gritty aspects of my personality are exposed and I’m grateful that I’ve had someone in my life that is willing to be patient about it, but hey, one thing is to be patient and understanding, and another one is to be having to ‘bear’ with it and create a conditioning, an acceptance of it even If we both know it’s not the best way to live.
IT’s also needless to say how this exposes me as at times focusing too much on preaching certain principles, but letting these big points just ‘slip by’ as if they didn’t matter. It is also regrettable that I require to get to a point of having to notice an emotional reaction in order to make something seriously needing my attention and committing to change these patterns within me, because I also know and am aware when I’ve gone into this very obtuse, stubborn and controlling way of behaving that in my mind seems like ‘best for all’ but in that really forgetting about the individuality of others and realizing that even if I see it is ‘best’ for me, it can’t be applied ‘like that’ to others. And other times – most of them – realizing that each moment that I exert out my control-freakism it’s actually coming from a long-lived habit of being the one that ‘calls the shots’ as they say in a relationship, instead of creating an equal space for each other to be ourselves, to understand where we are at in relation to the points we are walking or changing and for me, yes to be also patient to not jump into conclusions, but to give space for another.
What comes up is how I’ve written a blog like this from a past relationship, what opens up is feeling like ‘I’ve learned nothing because I’ve been there before,’ but I also have to learn to forgive myself for that, for repeating myself and the same patterns as before and understanding that the same patterns may come up again and that it only means: I have to focus on changing them, instead of going into shame, regret or plain judgment about being repeating myself, because that leaves me nowhere but back into a comfort zone of thinking ‘well, that’s how I’m always going to be.’
I’m here walking this process to demonstrate to myself that I can in fact change even the most difficult or ingrained aspects within me that certainly can lead to ruin any relationship, because no one wants to be in a relationship with someone that acts like a dictator. To me, as I’ve shared many times before, it has to do with a sense of righteousness, believing I’m right and know what is the way to go. I have to humbly realize this is not so and in doing so, realize I have to get to place myself in the shoes of others in a much more ‘empty’ way, without placing myself in their shoes but still having ‘my own principles, my own mindset’ while doing so, which ends up in me thinking or perceiving that I know what they should do, what is best for them.
Yes, this is mainly the point and the reasoning behind it, which is why it has become so tricky and at times difficult to let go, because of holding on to the idea that I am right, I know the way’ but it’s best to realize I may have an idea of what could work, but it is up for each person to decide for themselves. I can only then focus on being there walking with others without wanting to impose ‘my ways’ onto them, and rather work on creating these moments within me where I can become aware of this pattern coming up in me, and so make a pause to realize ‘red flag, control freakism point here’ and take a breath to then speak back in an awareness of me having to Let Go of wanting to ‘show the way’ or ‘give instructions of what must be done’ or ‘give a judgment of what is right or wrong.’ I can always give perspectives but I must accept the fact that I can’t change others, I can’t impose myself onto others, I can’t ‘walk their solution’ for them either, nor do I have to conveniently ‘say what to do’ in a way where I’m only considering what benefits me or what I believe is best for me.
So this is where I’m at and working with currently – yep in my head it’s like ‘ah more of the same’ really, but that’s who I am and what I’ve become with this pattern, it’s like a lifetime habit that I have to now take responsibility for.
Thanks for reading.
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Leave a comment | tags: becoming aware vs acting on it. parental habits, communication in relationships, control-freak, control-freakism, deciding to change, dictatorial, imposing, impositive, learning to listen, mother behavior, motherly, not listening, obtuse, relationships, righteousness, stubborn | posted in Behavior, Conflicts, control, pattern, relationships, respect, responsibility
Or walking through the character weakness I created through cheating in relationships and turning it into a current self-committed strength.
In this same process of doing a bit of a ‘looking back’ in my life and the things that I’ve been most ashamed of and regret and have in essence kept as stuff that had ‘haunt’ me as my past was cheating in relationships. As I write this I look away from the screen for a moment because a part of me would not want to expose this side of myself, would prefer to keep things ‘to myself’ but I also see the benefit of not only sharing about this to ‘expose’ myself in the past, but more so to share what I considered as a very personal process that ‘I should keep to myself’, but this was mostly because of existing in shame towards it and judging that ‘tendency’ of myself as something really bad, unforgivable, that caused pain and sorrow in others.
This has been something that I have immediately linked to reviewing shame as it’s been opened up in the awesome audio support here: Facing and Forgiving Real Shame (Part 1) – Demons in the Afterlife and Facing and Forgiving Real Shame (Part 2) – Demons in the Afterlife and through having such support as well as looking at and opening up the word ‘reconciliation’ within me, I saw that I had not made peace with this aspect of myself, mostly also because of keeping it as something that I should never speak of or admit about myself.
I have worked with this for myself, and even if I knew what I was doing at the time, I simply didn’t want to change my ways and would like to ‘keep my possibilities open’ which I only managed to change in the past relationship I had and I’m quite glad about that with myself in how through walking this process and from the very beginning of the relationship, I made a decision to no longer allow myself to ‘waver’ in my decision to be with that person even if we weren’t physically together right away, I made that decision to for once live that commitment to myself, to show to me that I could in fact stop having ‘affairs’ in thought, word or deed when it comes to personal relationships, and I am grateful to myself that I did this even if yes, there were surely moments that I could have defined as ‘openings’ or ‘temptations’ if you will, which surely are never ‘gone’ as such because I realize I have the ability to decide what I define as a ‘temptation’ to begin with which in a way it’s a whole word in itself to open up, which already implies a form of weakness from my perspective, where I believe that ‘I cannot help myself/cannot control/cannot direct’ myself in something and thus ‘fall’ into it, which surely I did experience in relation to cheating as such, which is why I had to yes, of course, let go of that ability within me to make it quite simple to act out on what I saw as an opportunity or potential.
To me the source of shame was more in relation to knowing what I caused in others, the consequences when this happened to be known. Shame and regret emerged within the realization that I was the cause of a lot of turmoil, depression, sadness in in someone’s life, and also how ‘shameless’ I was at the same time in doing it, with without their awareness in my past relationships, which I have by now become aware all were motivated as with many other things in our lives, by the idea of something better, new, more exciting, or simply doing it because ‘the opportunity was here’ and taking it as an ‘innocent’ moment which was of course not living the word innocence in a supportive manner, but more through an experience to veil my responsibility at the time and the actual fear of the potential consequences, like it is explained in this other awesome supportive audio Using Innocence to Defend Fear – Quantum Physical, which I recommend to understand how this ‘misuse’ of the word innocence takes place within ourselves, that was quite helpful for me to also open up this point recently.
I could also say, yes it still was someone else’s decision to dive into such depressive experience upon becoming aware of what I had done, but my part in the whole point is having been dishonest and creating a consequence that in normal terms of course it is not something that is received in stability by most people. So, I have beaten myself up – figuratively speaking – quite a few times for this kind of situations that yes I caused and contributed to creating, while at the same time over time and over some more years after that, I still would do it and not really make a decision to change, until I did after deciding to actually change this ‘tendency’ and pattern within me that I had veiled myself off by seeing it as something that is ‘just here’ and ‘just happened’ while being fully aware that of course it always takes one’s decision to do or not do something.
I’ve also learned through communicating about this point to in a way see that we all cheat ourselves in different ways and levels. Some of us have acted on it, some others tend to only fantasize about doing it, but don’t get to actually live it. That’s how I’ve also seen that cheating as such is always a point of self-deception, where yes one is not living fidelity towards another being and instead is seeking for ‘something else’ with another person, not only at a physical level, but also at a mind level or in the form of ‘mental affairs’ too, because I saw how the sheer acceptance of ‘thinking about another’ in those partnership terms or fantasizing about having a relationship with them or having sex with another person while being in a committed relationship constitutes in essence already an act of ‘cheating’ to oneself, where one is only entertaining an idea of ‘someone else’ in our minds, while one is having an actual, physical, tangible relationship to develop, nurture and commit to, which is what I have decided to do and live from now on in my life.
I’ve been looking at what ‘led me’ to make it so easy for me to not measure consequences, to make it so easy to make a single decision in one moment and for a moment just throw out of the window any commitment to another person because ‘the opportunity presented itself’ and ‘I simply took it’ and how ‘feeble’ in a way I was when it comes to this, being very much moved by desire, lust, an idea of ‘something/someone better’ or simply because ‘it was here’ and so I moved to just do it.
Now, the details of how, when and where I did this all are not relevant to share here, but to me it’s sufficient to share how the kind of laxity towards it is what was a source of shame, which I then also walked through to create an understanding, to understand ‘who I was’ at the time so as to not just see through the eyes of morality but through seeing me and who I was at the time.
At the time I had not created any point of self-awareness or ‘barely’ creating it and developing it within myself, where I would talk to myself to create a point of ‘innocence’ about the moment, as a way to – as the previously mentioned Eqafe audio explains – it was a way for me to make things ‘alright’ within me and not truly have a blunt look at what I was accepting and allowing in having this ‘laxity’ about my commitment to my relationships and how I made it very normal to have ‘open potentials’ to other relationships while being in committed relationships or ‘somewhat’ committed relationships at the time, because they were what they were in the context that I was in at the time in my life as well, where I wasn’t really into developing a relationship of self support or self-respect yet.
One thing I noticed is that I of course suppressed a lot of these things because it was at a time in my life when I was using weed on a regular basis and it was my way to also ‘wipe out’ any immediate inner conflict and ‘shift’ within me to an ‘everything is alright’ state of mind, which I only can know of because I would write about what I was in fact experiencing, and that’s the only remembrance I have of it, because at a conscious level to me it seemed as if there was no conflict at all, but this is how I made myself ‘think’ that ‘I am perfectly fine with it, I know what I’m doing, there’s no problem at all in me, no one’s getting hurt’ as a way to create a false sense of innocence within it all to not have to have a clear view of what I was participating in.
Working on this point has become one of those examples that something that I saw as a weakness in me, I’ve worked on developing it and turning it into a strength within me for the past couple of years.
Though before going into the ‘developing it as a strength,’ I want to share about the process of walking through shame itself and in our group chat at Desteni we had a very cool discussion that led to open up this point about ‘shame’ which can be read here: You cannot see that which you are – 12 July 2017 which opened the door along with looking at the word ‘reconciliation’ for me to do this for once and for all, to identify where and how I’ve experienced that kind of shame in my life and it has been definitely linked to cheating – and it was actually quite a gift in the way that it is explained in this audio support I mentioned at the beginning of this blog about shame, in the sense that I would probably not have gotten to see my reality this way if I had not become aware of how my actions affected another’s life, which at the time I suppressed and just felt bad about it, guilty, remorseful. But I had not taken that step of acknowledging the profound shame I felt in relation to it and it’s probably one of those things that have ‘marked me’ in my life, yet it is and will continue to be there as a reminder of what I’ve done, what I caused when allowing myself to be moved by desire, attraction, the idea of ‘something better’ or something ‘more exciting’ or ‘new’ and all of these experiences I linked to the act of cheating, which were in fact me seeking an experience that eventually of course led to ending relationships due to not establishing that self-commitment, self-honor and self-respect for myself first of all.
In retrospect it is ‘easier’ for me to see how I could have decided to change myself in those moments when facing this ‘temptation’, yet at the time I had not made a clear decision to change, because I still wanted to have these ‘options’ available to me. I wasn’t living a commitment to myself nor towards another. So this is to me an example where many times we make things ‘difficult’ to do or believe that ‘it’s beyond me’ to change, but in self-honesty, the reality is that I was not wanting to change or give up something that I wanted to have, experience or indulge into in my life.
The perceived benefits of ‘going for it’ are only that, a perception, a momentary experience if anything because over time, I see how every time that I ‘gave into it’ became that kind of scars that won’t go away from your mind, and one can self-forgive it, surely, to recognize the point and ensure one doesn’t repeat it again, but as it has been recently explained: self forgiveness wont’ ‘erase’ the memories. Memories will remain as part of who we are, as reminder, as a gift, a ‘cautionary tale’ as I’d like to call them of what I could put myself and others through If I give into this kind of ‘desires’ or ‘fleeting sensations’ that seemed to just ‘open up’ as ‘opportunities’ in my life – which is how I used to define them, see them.
It also had to do with how I approached life back then, where I had placed my life, my destiny in the hands of something ‘else separate from me’ where I thought that people, things, situations would ‘happen for a reason’ and so I would create an innocence point within it as well, which is of course innocence lived as deception, deliberate self-deception just to not have to see the truth and reality of myself in it. Innocence to me now as a living word has a very much different meaning that doesn’t relate at all to ‘pretending to be delusional’ and not realize what I am doing lol, I mean, I know I can only ever deceive myself in fact and that’s where this whole point of cheating is at, not only ‘towards others’ but towards myself, my self-commitment and self-agreement that I am busy living for myself and those whose lives I am directly related to now.
Have these apparent ‘temptations’ gone away? Nope. If I would decide to see a moment, a person, a situation as such and accept it and allow it to exist in me, it would not be so much of a ‘difficult thing’ to do because it’s just like anything else when one ‘goes for it’ without questioning ‘who am I’ within doing something. And yes it can be a bit scary to think of the potentials on this which applies for anything else that we see ourselves having a propensity or tendency to do – and have done in the past – but that’s how I decide to instead of giving any attention to these ‘potentials’ rather create a solid foundation for me to walk through it and as I mentioned earlier, turn it into a strength.
So this is another aspect of our minds, our lives and process where no amount of self-forgiveness will actually remove the potential ‘triggers’ or ‘stimuli’ that we can still decide to react to or ‘act upon’ in our minds – this is why walking through our minds is a moment by moment application, daily thing, every moment thing whenever it is required.
So, how am I living this relationship to this past tendency to ‘cheat’ in relationships? Well, I can wholly say to myself that it’s been quite cool to build that decision of living self-honor, self-respect, self-commitment and consideration – not only for me but to others – when it comes to remaining committed to someone and be able to practically test myself in various times and situations to see ‘who am I’ within it all, and so far I’ve seen how every single time it’s a constant decision to ‘stick’ to my decision to live fidelity and loyalty, simply because that’s the person that I decide to be for myself and another in my life.
Thanks for reading and thanks to the beings that share their experiences at eqafe.com which surely set the example for me to open this up for myself too.
Have a listen yourself too!
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Leave a comment | tags: bad, can't forgive yourself, cheating, cheating in relationships, decision to change, desteni, desteni process, ego, I cheated myself, innocense, living decisions, mykey, reconciliation, regret, remorse, self deception, self judgment, self reconciliation, shamfeul, sharing is caring, veiling fears, veiling responsibility, walking through shame, wrong | posted in deception, Decisions, Deconstruction of Self, Regret, relationships, Resolve, respect, responsibility
I have previously discussed how it is that we condition ourselves to create/put on a hard veneer in order to – let me be frank – not be fucked with/bullied/attacked by others and how this becomes like a second skin growth to actually make up for an initial experience of being vulnerable or having felt attacked by others words/actions. Here we can see how we condition each other to be constantly expecting the worst from one another, and so becoming the ‘fighters’ in the battlefield that we’ve created of our lives.
There are various reasons for this, one can be survival which is the way we have conditioned ourselves, our human nature to be guarding our own interest out of fear of others taking it away or abusing each other to get the most with the least effort etc. Another one is more related to that ‘attack’ that exists as a violent action toward one another, verbally/psychologically speaking while at the same time having the possibility to escalate to become physical as well. This is how I could see that we begin ‘corrupting’ ourselves0 when taking each others words personally, as a ‘personal attack’ and so create it in the form of bullying or ‘trollism’ as it exists now.
Here I’ll focus on a rather simply form in which I’ve noticed my own ‘defense-mode’ and what are the reasons for it. I’ve been actively participating in answering/interacting on YouTube and forums wherein I have had one of the most vivid evidences of how we can attack each other just for the sake of winning a ‘battle’ in our minds, just for the sake of ‘being right’ and making one another look like ‘an ass’ because ‘they are wrong’ and so in essence co-creating just another virtual battlefield to breed human hatred or perpetuate the ‘Divide and Conquer’ mind frames which I initially would react to in an emotional way upon reading such denigrating, defaming,, spiteful, violent and even life threatening comments we would get on a daily basis as a result of what we publish, which is all about life in equality, living rights, what is best for everyone, etc.
So, looking back, this is what I see as a cool ‘training ground’ when it comes to facing the REAL human nature and not only see the one I had believed in – such as the good nature one – while being locked in my ‘home bubble’ and my limited environment with limited interactions, where I yes certainly did face bullying and backstabbing from ‘friends’ at an early age, prompting me into quite a ‘depression ‘ at the age of 7, 8 because of not being able to fathom such ‘harm’ imposed toward me from another at first, until I had the support from my mother to realize I did not have to take others words/actions personally – which was great support and led me to become rather independent from sheeple mentality while going through school. I did, however, become somewhat defensive in my personality, I could say that yes I had clear principles but a lot of it was also from the starting point of showing ‘others’ that ‘you can’t mess around with me,’ it worked to a certain extent – but what happens when that ‘veneer’ becomes ‘who you are’ and how one dictates one’s every interaction?
I see that the defense-mode that I am able to act out upon in one moment actually stems from acting once again based on past experiences/memories where I still place myself in such ‘defense mode’ meaning being ready to be ‘attacked’ from the moment that I, for example, read a YouTube comment and so, instead of unconditionally reading the words that a person is placing, I already see where I can ‘find the point they are missing out on’ or what they are ‘defending’ or where they are trying to ‘prove me wrong, so that I can ‘point it out back’ and so this is something that I became used to do back in the day where we were certainly first becoming more aware of what each person implied in their words, which has been supportive nonetheless. But I see that I require to now and from here on step down from continuing that mechanism/way; this actually happened to me yesterday where I did thankfully get feedback from the person that I replied to on YouTube saying: “Marlen? I commented because you right on the money! Thank You!” The first word as my name with a question mark implying that they probably didn’t understand why I had replied in such a ‘harsh’ manner. And so I realized that I had come through toward him in the same old ‘attack-mode’ and ‘defense-mode’ instead of just seeing where the person is coming with the comment, what I can agree on as that’s our common ground and then expanding a bit on it without having the starting point of ‘proving him wrong’ or judging his very reply for not considering all points that I see but simply focusing on what I can do to assist and support to expand on the points brought up and create a conversation from there.
Assist and support here are the key points, not to ‘defend my point’ or ‘defend my cause’ because that’s what creates the battlefield on YouTube, but rather keeping it simple when answering back and inviting the person to continue the dialogue instead of wanting ‘them’ to ‘change’ all of a sudden toward Me and what I have to say, as that would be me as ego wanting validation/acceptance from others right away. The same point applies when I have deemed others as being ‘defensive’ toward me and so judging others as ‘being on defense mode’/being on attack-mode but it is really only me projecting my perception upon them because I’ve ‘been there/done that too.
So the key here is to then when and as I see myself reading comments, reading/hearing another’s words, I assist and support myself to not go into the predisposition of fighting/ attacking another based on the belief/assumption that ‘they are here to attack me first’ and so, instead allow me to read the comment/words unconditionally, without expectations or already ‘sharpening my knife’ to ‘get back at them,’ as I see that within this starting point I perpetuate the conflict and not allow myself to be really HERE with/as the words written/spoken and so be able to interact/reply back within the consideration of what I can learn from what the person is explaining, what I can learn from them, where I see that I agree upon to also reply back and letting the person know I also see that/agree with it.
This implies: Seeing where there is a point where I can share from my own realizations, self investigations and not only from knowledge and information, all of this within the consideration of placing myself in another’s shoes, taking into consideration the words in one YouTube comment, one email, one conversation and ‘walking with’ to expand on a point of cognitive dissonance, misinformation, belief, or an emotional reaction to the points explained, so that I can also point it out in a considerate non-defensive, non-attacking, non-aggressive manner which means explaining to another a point the same way I would want another to explain it to me: with patience, with humbleness and gentleness so as to be able to let the other person know that I do stand as these principles I talk about at all times, this is who I am and this is the consideration, care, gentleness and humbleness toward others that I commit myself to live by when interacting with them, so as to not come through as ‘me having the truth’ or ‘me having to be always right’ but being also willing to see my faults, my mistakes, where I reacted to another’s words and so take responsibility for such reactions myself.
So to not go into ‘denial’ of my actions, which is what the vlog was about in fact wherein I received such comment, here I stand directive of such point which opened up yesterday and so I am directing it here, as I see that if I want to create a world of transparency, integrity and trust, I have to be doing just that myself, seeing, realizing, understanding my mistakes, my reactions, investigate where they ‘come from,’ understand them, self forgive them and most importantly, give myself a new direction as to how I am going to be living these corrections from now on whenever I interact with another.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a predisposition of ‘having to defend myself’ when replying to YouTube Comments or replying to others’ words whether written or in a conversation, instead of realizing how I perpetuate my own memories of the past and even from my childhood of how I had to be ‘wary’ of people’s words and actions toward me, which is why I became ‘edgy’ as well, not being able to trust others and as I’ve explained before, this is not about ‘trusting others’ but rather trusting me in being able to read/hear words in stability and be able to support myself unconditionally to interact, reply back within the consideration of what is self-supportive both for ‘them’ and ‘myself’ as two or more individuals establishing a communication and settling the way to create a point of communal understanding – not fighting or ‘proving each other right/wrong’
I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to realize how I am in fact perpetuating the current status quo in our relationships where we have focused so much on the winner/loser mentality, the ‘attacker’ and the ‘attacked,’ the bully and the bullied and where we believe that we constantly have to be ‘defending’ ourselves which can only exist if we are ‘coming from’ a starting point of ego as in seeing others as enemies, as ‘the problem,’ as ‘the ignorant ones and oneself being the ‘right one,’ through which we approach another from the vantage point of seeing another as inferior to myself and so believing that I have to ‘educate them’ with ‘what I know’ instead of being actually grateful that there are people that are still willing to reply in a comment to a YouTube video and so be able to hear/get to know what others’ perspectives on a subject and learn from it, see where we still have to ‘align’ our understanding, what are the main points where there is still a point tampering self-realization, as well as being willing to correct ourselves if necessary and in the possible measure, being able to support and assist another to expand themselves a bit more – maybe point out some aspects they can do further investigation on, other blogs or vlogs to watch/read and so not immediately ‘showing the way out’ when the entire starting point of commenting by the other individual is to precisely establish communication and be able to continue it in the best possible way.
I realize that in our world nothing will be changing if we do not first focus on being able to get to hear /read one another, see where there is a common ground and build it from there, thus no longer existing in the ‘I’ll prove you wrong’ mentality.
I also realize that I have to be aware of not seeing myself as ‘the victim’ that is going to be ‘abused/attacked by others’ as in this position of victimization I then justify my ‘getting back at’ others as in ‘having to defend myself’ which is why in this world we, for example, allow the use and existence of guns, because we give into this mentality that ‘I have to protect myself, I have to be armed’ without first investigating why and what causes this abuse in the first place.
I realize that I have to stop projecting my past, and my ‘mind-frame’ that I had built around ‘commenting on YouTube’ as in ‘getting myself into a battlefield’ and instead, read the comments from the starting point of being able to support myself, to learn from another, to see where I can improve my communication, identify and recognize where I wasn’t clear/what I missed and so expand through this communication instead of already wanting to ‘end’ the interaction by placing a comment that could be seen as ‘sparking up reactions’ which previously I had defined as supportive for the person to ‘face themselves’ but, we are in a different stage in our process so I now apply the point of being gentle and supportive with others, the same way that I would like a ‘stranger’ on YouTube to reply to my messages and comments as well, doing to another what I would like to be done unto in the same situation and in all cases for that matter.
I commit myself to use the opportunity of interacting with others either through comments on a website, on a forum, on every day conversations/interactions so that I can expand and support myself while at the same time assisting and supporting another, because it is in these seemingly ‘irrelevant’ or ‘small moments’ that actual windows of opportunity exist to ‘connect’ to others and let them also realize that there are solutions, there are people that do not fall into the usual patterns of the divide and conquer mentality, and so this is what I commit myself to living in all aspects of my everyday living and interactions with people from around the globe through the marvelous platform that the Internet is.
I commit myself to redirect my judgments upon others being ‘in a defense mode’ and instead be able to in such moments immediately take the point back to self and direct myself toward another in a way wherein I can apply consideration, humbleness, gentleness to place myself in their shoes so that I am able to best support them and expanding ourselves through using words or even behavior, voice tonality that indicates in stability that I am here, I hear you, I understand you, let’s clarify this/let’s expand on this/ have you considered this point about this that you mentioned here? so that it is and becomes a more ‘inviting’ way to continue interacting with another.
I commit myself to walk through my own ‘predisposition’ of being in this ‘defense-mode’ so that I can stand here, clear, open, available and willing to communicate and direct another’s questions and sometimes even curiosity and not fall into the ‘attacking-mode’ but to genuinely be able to consider their starting point and so walk-with, instead of walking-against others.
I commit my self to live the realization that ‘the enemy’ is really myself and my own assumption, my own mind, my own projections which means that in practicality I am then going to be open to read/hear words without going into reaction, without already ‘preparing’ my artillery to shoot with a barrage of points that have nothing to do with what was initially said either, but to also keep it simple and ‘grow’ the conversation from there.
I commit myself to only reply to comments/written and spoken interactions when I have given myself a ‘moment of clarity’ which means when I have breathed and ensured that I am in fact stable, here, that I am taking responsibility for my initial reactions or starting point toward another, and so be more open, willing and available for genuine communication, ensuring I have no interference/noise as my own reactions preventing me from hearing/reading another unconditionally.
I commit myself to ‘take back to self’ any judgments I may had toward ‘others’ as ‘them being the attackers’ or ‘them being in a defense-mode’ as in fact, that would mean me reacting in ego towards ego – lol – so the best way to interact with another is to work with the common sense of looking at words themselves, no assumptions, rather asking what they in fact mean if the point is not clear, but generally not jumping into assumptions, not taking my own knowledge, my own ego into consideration when interacting with others, as that’s where the shifts happen and the divide and conquer mentality is re-created, wherein I perceive that another is ‘not the same as myself’ and so I have to ‘prove them wrong’ according to me, which is where the problem exists.
So I instead commit myself to focus on directing the words, the comments, the situation for what it is, devoid of past grudges, preconditioning, preprogramming of ‘how I deal with others that I perceive are attacking me’ as I then live the realization that the ‘attack’ only exists in my mind as memories and experiences that I create when I take another’s words personally or as ‘going against me’ which is the ego-starting point of reading/hearing another, when we ‘take it personally’ instead of realizing that each one’s words relate to oneself only, and so I take self-responsibility.
I commit myself to in fact become a pillar of support for myself and others which means I cannot judge, I cannot avoid another or see them as ‘less than myself’ or as ‘ignorant’ but instead assist and support myself and others to transcend such limitations of the mind to work with what we have as our statements, see what we can agree upon and expand it from there, as Self Support.
So instead I am grateful that this point opened up so I could see what I was doing in this interaction and so be able to give it direction here for once and for all – so, thanks Tyler.
7. Living the Principle of Self Awareness – to be aware, to see, to recognize my own thoughts and Mind, to be self honest to the extent where I can take responsibility for when I see my thoughts / Mind is not what is best for me / others and commit to immediately take responsibility and change for myself and so for others
To learn more about taking responsibility for one’s mind, one’s reactions, please visit the following sites and join us in our endeavor too:
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The Necessity of Living by Principles
Throughout these past 6 and a half years I have embarked myself to understand more about the reality that I live in and that I most certainly was blinded from to be able to understand. Looking back and ‘putting the pieces together’ many of us – if not everyone and some simply don’t like to give ‘much thought’ into it – actually KNOW there is something profoundly wrong or ‘missing’ in our lives and this world. Yes, I also sought answers in some greater purpose, even in some divine and rather metaphysical concepts that I would simply hold on to because it remained as a comfortable lie that I ‘made sense of’ because it was comfortable and really not that challenging either, it was all about waiting and hoping in fact. But, the reality is that this was all the knowledge trap covered at all ‘fronts’ in the reality we live in to not EVER look in the most obvious place, the one that has always been here and that we have blatantly missed while ‘seeking truths’ or ‘seeking ourselves’ out there somewhere else: ourselves.
We are in fact living in a crucial time in our lives where the truth is being revealed behind the Veils to genuinely see the principle that has ruled us all thus far: Evil as the reverse of LIFE. I understand this might be rather an uncomfortable truth but for me it was actually the most supporting thing I could ever do, to be willing to understand that our actual nature as human beings is not that of benevolence, dignity, integrity, solidarity, love or else – and we have the blatant proof of that which is our world which we tend to reduce to a power-hunger game missing out the clue of where it all started in the first place, which is within ourselves, our very nature from which the rest of the world-system as we know it and the way we have enslaved each other to be masters and slaves has in fact emerged from: our own necessity to be controlled and to have such controllers, just because we have abdicated our power all along.
Throughout this process I have worked with – and continue to work on – being able to uncover/dis-cover my true potential that I had sedated and suppressed within personalities, ideas, beliefs of myself of which now I can look back and understand why so many of us still fear to ‘come to the front’ and speak up. Well, for reference of that you can read this blog site you’re on at the moment, I can only briefly say that there’s a massive de-brainwashing to be done in order for us to genuinely start recognizing the Power we all have and yes, ‘power’ as in our ABILITY and CAPACITY to direct ourselves to precisely ‘be the change that we want to see in the world’ which is not a positive-thinking mentality, this IS the Actual Process that it will take for us to genuinely change the foundation of the current ‘world-system’ that we see so ‘far’ from ourselves, not realizing that its very foundation exists/relies and solely exists in the intricacy of every single Though, Emotion and Feeling participation wherein we Allow ourselves to be Governed by the MIND, which is a preprogrammed Consciousness system in which we have only existed as fuzzy-logic survival-mode organic robots from which we have always only learned how to equate our OWN benefit and survival – but never ever learned how to genuinely start consider HOW we affect others with our decisions, our actions, our thoughts.
We have beseeched for ‘clues’ for ‘saviors,’ for a ‘good president’ to come and be our MESSiah, well, yes we have gotten ourselves only further down the rabbit hole because we haven’t yet understood one very basic principle: this world wasn’t founded upon the mercy of any god, it is actually ruled by our collective irresponsible ways that have created the reverse of life and as such it is to understand that: Nothing will change unless, I Change, unless We All make a stand and Change within ourselves and so the change in the without will be an outflow of this starting point which is Self-Change.
This is how we bring it all Back to Self and see, ok so what have we been Missing all along? What have we been Dissing all along? Living Principles – look at our culture! It’s plagued with vices, violence, revering death and destruction, consumerism, laziness, apathy, insanity, greed, power, sexual depravity, psychological abuse and the initiation of children to this great Consumerist CULTure wherein we have done everything but learning and fomenting ways of how to Honor ourselves as Living Beings – that is Nowhere to be found! not within parental education, in schools, in media, in arts, in politics, in religion, nowhere! Everywhere we have tainted ourselves with the same ILLusions of feelings as benevolence, feeling ‘good’ for doing some charities or believing that to Love Humanity means to ‘wish well’ for everyone, without even realizing why we have had the need to create such words as Love that imply only a fluttering experience in your stomach as a sign that Energy is all that we have in fact become within ourselves and toward another – but not life.
Everywhere I have researched and sought for answers, for a genuine structure of change I only have found further polarized solutions like thinking positively all day and deny ‘all the bad’ in your mind, seeking revenge to ‘the powers that be,’ changing personalities, doing some charity work here and there, be all nice and smiley and hope for better times to come or accept reality ‘as is’…. well, seriously, where are we pretending to get ourselves with that? Nowhere, of course as it’s all based on characters, ideas, self-presentations of ‘who we are’ toward OTHERS and so once again, missing out Who? Ourselves.
We require to have the actual guts and courage to develop some self-honesty along with having a directive structure and understanding of how it is that through one individual making a decision to stand AS and be Consistent and Congruent on the decision to Live by Principles, we become an Actual Revolution in this world, one that has Never existed before because we have always sought ‘solutions’ in the pre-fabricated Hegelian mentality of Thesis-Antithesis and creating the marvelous polarized and prefabricated upgrade of Synthesis. This has been our problem, still thinking within the same MIND-Construct and framework with which we have Created the problems in the same place.
Time to get OUT of the BOX as that’s where the illusion exists, that’s where we are governed by ideas, beliefs, fears, feelings and emotions, history, world-system constructs that we have obediently followed to the T out of fear.
Thinking OUT of the Box implies Living by Principles, doing exactly what you won’t see advertised on the TV, what Isn’t a ‘fashionable trend’ in the media and entertainment,, what would make you feel deeply uncomfortable in the first phases of implementing this as it IS in fact about getting out of our comfort zone, out of the comfort of fears, of resistance to change, or fearing to actually have to step Out of the Box where we have become obedient slaves and have come to adore as our prison, our own mind – Nothing and no one else but ourselves will cure our Stockholm Syndrome but ourselves.
So, this is why I have decided to walk the process of Living by Principles, where I have come to realize that I must ‘search no further’ for answers, but that the answer exists and resides within me, within the volition to actually become the point of change I sought outside of myself.
Hereby I commit myself to live by the following principles that represent me and many more around the world that have taken this oath to themselves in Equality, as the necessity of recognizing our actual power and so living it for the benefit of everyone in this world and existence, in Equality AS Life.
Join us if you agree it’s about time we Think Outside The Box
The Desteni of Living – My Declaration of Principle
1. Realizing and living my utmost potential
2. Living by the principle of what is best for all – guiding me in thought, word and deed to always in all ways direct problems to the best possible outcome for all
3. Living by the principle of self honesty – to ensure I am pure in thought, word and deed: that my within and without is equal and one. Who I am within is who I am without and vice-versa
4. Self Purification through Writing, Self Forgiveness and Self Application – the action of realizing I am responsible for my own thoughts, words and deeds, to forgive myself for transgressions and change myself to ensure I Take Responsibility for who, what and how I am and through this know that I can trust myself to always be honest with me and so others
5. Living the principle of Self Responsibility – realizing only I am responsible for what I accept and allow inside of me, my relationships and my outside world and so with this responsibility: only I have the power and ability to change that which I see is compromising who I am, what I live and how this affects others
6. Realizing that who I am in thought, word and deed affects not only myself – but others as well and so with Self Responsibility in thought, word and deed – I take responsibility for myself and so my relationships to be Self Aware in every moment and live in such a way that is best for me and so others as well
7. Living the Principle of Self Awareness – to be aware, to see, to recognize my own thoughts and Mind, to be Self Honest to the extent where I can take responsibility for when I see my thoughts / Mind is not what is best for me / others and commit to immediately take responsibility and change for myself and so for others
8. With taking responsibility for myself, becoming aware of myself – take responsibility and become aware of others in my life, to assist and support them as I am assisting and supporting myself – to give as I would like to receive and do the extra bit every day to see where I can contribute to other’s lives and so my own
9. Living the principle of self trust – as I commit myself to remain constant in my living of self honesty, self responsibility and self awareness, I stand as an unbending trust that I always in all ways know who I am no matter what I face and that in this I know, as proven in the constancy of my living that I will always honor and stand by what is best for all and so best for me
10. Making Love Visible – through me not accepting/allowing anything less than my utmost potential, I support those in my life to reach their utmost potential, to love them as I have shown love to myself by gifting to me my utmost potential, the best life/living experience and show others as I have shown myself what it means to LIVE
11. No one can save you, save yourself – the realization that the tools and principles of Desteni is the guide, but I must walk the path myself. We are here to assist and support each other in this process from Consciousness to Awareness/LIFE and what it means to live – but the process itself, where you are alone with yourself in your own Mind: is walked alone
12. Not waiting for anything or anyone to take responsibility for me and this world – but that I realize I have created who and how I am in this moment, therefore I have the responsibility to change who and how I am and so the realization that we as a collective created how and what this world is today and so it is the responsibility of the collective to change how and what this world is today
13. Honoring the life in each person, animal – everything from the great to the small of Earth, that we expand our awareness and responsibility to creating the best possible life for everyone and everything and so ourselves
14. Relationships as Agreements: individuals coming together using agreements as a platform to one-on-one expand, grow and develop as individuals in life and living to support/assist each other unconditionally to reach their utmost potential where the agreement is a coming together of individuals understanding what it means to stand as equals and to stand as one
15. Sex as Self Expression – where sex is an united expression between individuals in honor, respect, consideration and regard of each other as equals, two physical bodies uniting in equality and oneness – a merging of two equals as one physically.
16. Realizing that by the virtue of me being in this world – my responsibility does not only extend to my own Mind / my own Life, but to the minds and lives of everything and everyone of this earth and so my commitment is to extend this awareness to all of humanity to work together and live together to make this world heaven on earth for ourselves and the generations to come
17. I must in my thoughts, words and deeds – but most importantly in my Living Actions, become a Living Example for others in my world that is noticeable and visible when it comes to the potential of a person to change themselves and so change their world. So that more people can realize how we can change this world, by standing united in our self change within the principle of what is best for all to bring heaven to earth
18. I am the change I want to see in me and my world – to bring heaven to earth is to bring into being, into living the LIVING PROOF of a PRACTICAL HEAVEN that can be seen and heard in our actions and words. We are the Living Heaven that must come into creation in this Living World.
19. Through purifying my thoughts, words and deeds – my inner becomes my outer, so I bring into creation me as heaven into earth, realizing it is not enough to ‘see the change / be the change’ – for change to become REAL it must be a constant, consistent living of me through the words I speak and the actions I live visible and noticeable to all in every moment of breath
20. Realizing that my physical body is my temple – my physical body is the living flesh through which and in which I will bring into being and create / manifest heaven on earth as me in my thoughts, words and deeds and so I honor, respect and regard – nurture and support my physical body as I would nurture and support me as equals: my body is me
21. We are the change in ourselves and this world we have been waiting for: and so I commit to dedicate myself and my life for each one as all to realize this, as nothing will change if we don’t change in all that we are, within and without
22. The realization that for me to be able to change myself in thought, word and deed to the most effective living being that I can be and become – I first have to ‘know thyself’ and so commit myself to investigate, introspect and understand how I became who I am today, to prepare the road before me into self creation of a responsible, aware, self honest and trustworthy person for myself and so for all
23. The realization that for me to be able to contribute to change in this world – I have to get to ‘know thyself’ as this world and so commit myself to research, investigate and introspect the inner and outer workings of this world and align the systems of today to present and give the best possible life for all on Earth
Investigate who we are as a group of people committed to take responsibility for ourselves and so become the foundation for a new world in Equality.
1 Comment | tags: activism, be the change, challenge the system, challenge yourself, change the world, Congruency, consistency, desteni, equality, glitch in the system, here, journey to life, living principles, mentality, mind consciousness system, mind construct, morals, out of the matrix, Physical Change, power, practivism, predictability, preprogramming, rebelling against the establishment, revolution, seeking for answers, seeking for saviros, self change, self honesty, Self Interest, self investigation, self limitation, self responsibility, The Declaration of Living Principles, truthseekers, values | posted in activism, authority, change, change the system, Collectivism, common sense, Deconstruction of Self, Desteni, Desteni I Process, ego, entertainment, Equal Life, Equality, forgiveness, Global movement, goals in life, good, grassroots, Human Egolution, insanity, Journey To Life, leadership, liberation, Life, Life in Equality, media, mind control, morality, motivation, negativity, physical process, positivity, realization, respect, responsibility, Sculpting in Time, self awareness, self coaching, Self Governance, self interest, self perfection, self realization, self trust, Self Will, self-honesty, Self-Responsibility, social conditioning, social engineering, social organism, Social Reforms, soul construct, suffering, system, thinking, thoughts, understanding, value, wisdom, words, world equality, world system, world values
ASSumptions and Self Trust
I realized how in one single moment where I trust my mind and assumptions made in my mind in one single moment of reaction where I jumped into conclusions, ‘linking the dots’ to assume about another’s’ words/actions, I in that moment actually miss my point of self-trust and instead go into trusting my mind. How many times have I heard: do not trust your mind which means, to not trust any form of reaction, emotion, thought that I am not directly seeing for its full implication such as:
Who am I the moment that I am assuming this point about another? Who am I within ASSuming?
Because it’s really not about another here, it’s about myself being working in my mind in such assumption-mode which is something I had taken for granted actually so it is also cool that this point emerged in such a ‘straight’ manner, where I am able to actually see how I created a rift within a relationship, but more so within myself as in that moment I was not fully here considering all the implications of me thinking/assuming about others which is then part of how we concoct conflicts ‘about others’ but really is only a conflict I create in my mind based on also an accumulation of other assumptions that I also deemed as ‘unimportant,’ not considering the accumulation that takes place when I went assuming things and instead of confronting them with the person, the point then emerged as an automated assumption to fulfill my previous ideas/beliefs about what was going on with others’ lives.
This is also a very pertinent point as I could notice it created the kind of ‘hangover’ I hadn’t experienced in a long time, when you know that you did something that could have had further consequences that I didn’t measure when jumping into these series of thoughts and so, it is also to debunk the ‘perfect world’ that I also have in my head about my relationships with others, and to realize how careful and utmost attention I require to exist as in every moment to Not judge, not go into assumption, not ‘draw conclusions’ based on what I believe/think/perceive about others.
From making such mistake and going into feeling ‘bad’ or ‘guilty’ I would only trap myself in yet another emotion to cloud the actual point to learn here and to take self responsibility for, which is how to be able to stop assumptions that stem from a moment of ‘linking the dots’ according to what in I decided ‘made sense’ based on previous points where I also assumed points about another. So, if anything what I am here to develop is self-trust in a new dimension I hadn’t considered before: being able to trust myself to be Here as breath in every moment to be very aware of any minor reaction but mostly Assumption that’s the key word here as that’s where one draws conclusions without physical proof that things are the way I am ASSuming they are/happened.
1 accept as true without proof.
2 take (responsibility or control).
3 begin to have (a quality, appearance, or extent). Adopt falsely.
So there’s a few points to self-forgive here:
1. Not being here in the moment when I quickly jumped into conclusions and assuming something about others.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to assume which is to accept a thought, a reaction, an experience within me as ‘true’ and as such trust my thoughts, my reactions, my experience instead of being fully present here and able to assess every single thought that I accept and allow to exist within me.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make of ‘assumption’ which is a rather unfortunately common way to quickly draw conclusions and ‘make up my mind’ about something/someone without actually proving it myself, gathering the actual information, cross referencing it, communicating with the person or in the situation I am creating any form of assumption about and as such I realize that assuming is nothing else but a fancy way to name lying/lies wherein I accept myself to concoct and fabricate a lie to myself in order to prove other lies to me which I have also created/drawn about something/someone
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to ever FEEL certain about ‘my assumptions’ and within this not realizing that I am placing trust into my thoughts, my Feelings, my emotions, my mind instead of first actually Stopping and looking at what am I actually doing to myself when I assume or rather create/fabricate ideas/beliefs/perceptions about something/someone which are in essence lies in order to prove a point that I have ‘assumed’ about something/someone – which doesn’t make sense as I am relying on a self-concocted lie to then make myself ‘right’ about what I had actually also created as a judgment, a belief, a perception about something or someone previously – which means: it was all a lie that I actually made myself believe as true without measuring the consequences of how I in fact was affecting my relationship with another without openly talking about it.
- 2. Not realizing that it wasn’t about me ‘not trusting’ another but rather me trusting my mind and my assumptions based on what I also had been accumulating as other assumptions which I didn’t really confront and communicated directly with the person I was assuming things about – therefore missing out the essential point of living the word frankness and being direct when it comes to rather communicating about something instead of leaving points accumulate within me as Assumptions that I didn’t communicate, which then caused me to easily jump into conclusions based on previous moments where I also jumped into conclusions/assumed and thus considered that I could not trust someone any longer.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to jump into conclusions and assume about the reason behind another’s actions based on what I had also assumed about others’ lives/actions/words which implies that I had already allowed my self to be assuming/be lying to myself, be making up ideas and beliefs as to why something/someone exists/does something in a certain manner which actually can only point out to myself what actually still exists within me, which I covered up with the line ‘I don’t like being lied to’ and creating a reaction of ‘feeling cheated’ in that moment, but I didn’t even realize that it was all really me creating this all within me, not realizing I created the assumptions/the lies within me in that split second based on me accumulating previous assumptions that I hadn’t actually communicated and confronted which is why it was so easy for me to just continue the assumptions because I had done it in the past and ‘let it be’ without actually scrutinizing the point myself and being critical about what is it that I am actually accepting and allowing to exist within me – which is then entirely me assuming my responsibility to my mind/my thoughts/ my experience instead of diverting it toward another, which is the way to abdicate my own responsibility to my own thoughts in the first place.
I realize that in the past in relationships with people I have allowed myself to keep quiet in relationships which had already lead me to relationship failures, wherein the moment I don’t actually open up and confront the point with another which is what I would like others to do onto myself, I am actually being the starting point of my own self-agreement failure as I am not being entirely self-honest to myself to First even before confronting the ‘assumption’ with another, first question my own assumption, see where I am gathering the information from, what are my foundations for it, what is the proof that I have for what I am assuming first – so that I then first ensure that I am the one that takes self-responsibility for myself, my thoughts, my mind and once I have cleared myself from any reaction or lies/assumptions created about another, but instead realize that I do have some points to confront and reference with others, then I simply direct myself to communicate and open it up instead of allowing these points to accumulate and kind of go ‘rotting’ in the background as this is where and how then going into further assumptions, reactions becomes more automated based on the string-of-lies and assumptions about something/someone.
Therefore I commit myself to live myself first what I would like others to do onto me too, which is to be upfront, clear, frank, directive, transparent which are words I have to first and foremost not to ‘ask’ from others, but to live these words myself within my own self-relationship with in turn then will be my relationship toward any other individual as well as who I am.
Here is then where I take/assume absolute responsibility wherein instead of assuming /lying to myself, drawing conclusions, making up ‘my mind’ about something or someone, I rather live the word assumption as assuming/taking the responsibility to ensure that I am first here, stable within myself and as such ensure that every word that I am creating in my mind has a clear starting point and is entirely self-directive, as I see that an accumulation of lies which I allowed to exist within me as assumptions then become a more automated form of lying which I didn’t question within me first, and so then actually exists as a point of abuse toward others coming from me within creating an experience of distrust or assuming ‘I am being lied to’ without realizing that the actual lie, the actual problem exists within me as an assumption in itself where I lie to myself about what I believe/think/perceive about another which is actually entirely existent in my own mind –therefore
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist in a form of righteousness whenever I had assumed things wherein I then trust my lies/my mind going into assumption about things/people without actually investigating the point for myself, without actually rather confronting any misunderstanding with another through communication as I see and realize that if I apparently ‘don’t like lies/don’t like to lie’ which is one of the points I have placed within me as ‘virtue’ – without seeing that in fact this is just another form of ‘honesty’ card as the ‘system honesty’ because I missed the actual SELF-Honesty which is first questioning the validity, the substance and how acceptable my own thoughts and reactions are in my own mind, which is the first point of self-honesty missed when believing that ‘I am being lied to’ as this thought already implies I am actually the one lying to myself by hearing/placing trust in a thought that I have created in absolute irresponsibility, which means I didn’t assume my responsibility upon my own thought-creation that lead to assumptions about something/someone.
- 3. I haven’t realized that this is really not about being able to trust another, but rather how I didn’t live self-trust fully to instead of assuming/jumping into conclusions in My mind to instead rather communicate it, to create an agreement of communication which will ensure that any relationships with others will be then like a fish tank: fully visible as there is nothing to hide, no backchats created as that is what creates the fracturing of any relationship, and within my self-agreement I have committed myself to be able to have transparent, integral relationships with every individual, which means having no secrets, no hidden agendas toward one another, no judgment, no backchat, no emotion or assumptions about others.
I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to actually realize that I cannot ‘lose trust on another’ as there is really no ‘another’ but myself that creates such distrust by trusting my own mind, my own assumptions, my own beliefs which I have righteously created upon not actually communicating and opening up points that I’ve looked at but didn’t communicate, which is how one goes festering ‘little points’ over time which become yet more lies and more ‘reasons’ to assume/believe things about myself/others which is entirely existent in my own mind and as such, it is myself that has to ensure that I can instead trust myself – which means that
I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to realize that I cannot trust myself whenever I am assuming, whenever I am reacting, whenever I am creating doubt/uncertainty/reactions toward another which I am not directly referencing Within and for myself first to see the validity of my thoughts, my experiences and if I then have sufficient proof, reason, foundation for what I am considering is something to point out in a relationship with another, then I pull up my socks and confront the situation as I realize that it is actually quite dishonest to not open up points as they come up, as these points then go accumulating and creating further unspoken assumptions/reactions which certainly creates a rift within my self and from myself toward others, which is entirely unnecessary when we are in fact able to communicate and be open about any point or situation that I see emerged within me and so
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to eve fear confronting something or someone about my own assumptions which is rather a self-sabotage point because by confronting my own assumptions then the lies would be able to be spotted easier –but, the moment ‘I keep quiet’ that’s when the same pattern repeats: I don’t speak, further assumptions are created and so I create and give energy/attention to lies, to assumptions instead of immediately opening the point up and communicating about it.
Most importantly I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to live self-trust fully as I realize now how whenever I am assuming I cannot and I am not in fact living self-trust because I am thinking/assuming/linking dots based on what I read/ get to know or perceive which is entirely subjective and self-created upon premises that I have also defined in a certain manner so that it fits ‘my assumption’ which is then entirely self-deceptive first and foremost.
When and as I see myself jumping into conclusions, assuming what’s going on with something/someone I stop and I breathe, I ensure that I am back into physical reality and focus on myself, questioning what is it exactly that I am accepting and allowing to exist within me toward myself and toward others? And within this simply stop continuing assuming and instead, rather immediately referencing the point instead of allowing it to ‘pass’ because I see that allowing things to ‘pass’ it’s actually just an allowance of having points remain undirected, unsolved, which is another way of saying: I am not taking responsibility for my own reactions, assumptions beliefs about something/someone in one moment, which is what creates the problem in the first place: when I allow lies/assumptions to exist within me and go ‘unnoticed’ and neglecting the responsibility I have to every single thought, movement, experience that I have in my mind and that No thought, no reaction, no experience can be righteous or justified.
When and as I see myself once again ever going into the backchat ‘I don’t like being lied to’ – I stop and I breathe – And I bring myself HERE to realize that I am the one lying to myself first by being self-dishonest and being creating a reaction upon my own thoughts and so, instead focus on looking at the point objectively so that I can then see what do I need to cross reference in order to ensure I am not assuming, and so confront the point or situation in the moment.
I see and realize that I have to practice that ability to be more directive in the moment which means not allowing something to ‘go by’ and allow it to just ‘pass’ as this is me not taking responsibility for what I created in my mind.
Therefore I commit myself to actually develop first self-trust wherein I am able to ensure that every single thought I have I can be certain it is self-directive and that I am fully here as I utilize my mind constructively to direct myself, to clarify situations, to open up and cross-reference with others, as that is then the way wherein I can ensure that I can trust myself in relationship to others which means: I can trust myself that I won’t create lies/assumptions about something/someone – but instead focus on investigating, taking/assuming responsibility to myself, my mind, my reactions and so within this, it will invariably and by default will also be easier to confront/expose/open up a point with others as I am then having the openness lived by myself first, which is the self-agreement at all times, to not see ‘others’ as the problem but always self, always taking the point back to myself.
I commit myself to ensure that I remain clear and stable no matter what, no matter how even something that I believe is a problem exists in reality, as we do live in a reality where things are not ‘easy’ or ‘smooth ‘ or ‘without problems’ because this entire world, our relationships and our lack of self-responsibility to our own minds is what has created the nature of a problematic world – therefore, instead of seeing this as a ‘big point’ I realize that I have to instead use this as a flag point to become aware of any other moment where I see myself assuming things about something/someone, quiet myself in that moment and focus on MYSELF and stopping lying/ deceiving and being self-dishonest within me accepting and allowing such assumptions/backchat about something/someone and instead focus on seeing the point and then looking how I am going to direct it, assuming my responsibility to my words, my mind, my actions and inactions.
I commit myself to also not continue ‘bashing’ myself for committing this mistake of assuming a lot about something/someone as that guilt/remorse is only an experience that also prevent us from directly spotting the responsibility within it all, so I instead focus on my responsibility to every word, every reaction I create and rather focus on preventing/stopping any reaction from existing within me in any given moment wherein I observe something/someone and go into believing that ‘I know’ why something/someone happens/does something as this is entirely self-referential which means: it has nothing to do ‘with others’ but rather upon myself and what I do or don’t do.
To Develop Self-Honesty and Learn how to live a Self-Agreement to be able to Trust ourselves, investigate:
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The Fallacious Archetype of Power
The word ‘power’ in Spanish is ‘poder’ which means simply ‘can’ / ‘being able to’ and as such it is interesting how we have elevated the word ‘power’ to something beyond ourselves, something that we almost see sitting up high on a throne far away from our reach, we see it as some blinding almighty light that only gods and masters can obtain, and politicians, CEO’s, and elites of this world can control with money. This is how I would see the word ‘power’ before, filled with something ‘extraordinary’ that apparently none of us regular ‘mortals’ have – this is the cognitive dissonance, the fallacy existent within the word at a collective level which is precisely the construct of hierarchy that exists within each one of us.
By ‘the construct of hierarchy’ I mean the ability to layer ourselves as human beings in various strata of the super rich and the ‘empowered’ at the top, and then going all the way down to the lower strata: lower middle class to people living in abject poverty.
The sheer acceptance of poverty and the ‘megarich as something ‘normal’ or part of ‘how the world works’ already reveals something: we have created an idea of what ‘power’ implies as the amount of money one can have, which creates the abusive logic of: IF you are not a super rich elite person THEN you are ‘disempowered’ as the ‘power’ is held in the hands of those few ones at the top and only ‘they’ can rule and control and tell us what to do and how to do things…. This is the general belief wherein we become subject to ‘others’ and in this the first point of abuse is precisely not being able to recognize ourselves as equals.
Now, this is just to place into context the first fallacy: Power means to have LOTS of money, being in a ‘higher position’ where you can control others and abuse something/someone to continue aggrandizing your personal power. So, this is certainly not the definition of power, but the definition of Abuse masked as ‘power’ and ‘success’ and some kind of ‘divine power’ that is ingrained in our minds from thousands of years ago, mind control it is.
This idea of ‘power’ in the form of abuse must be realized for the consequences it has created the moment that we All have given more importance to money itself – which turns into possessions, enslaving others to do the work for you, to be able to control people for personal gain, to deceive, to lie and cheat, to bribe – in order to advance personal plans for power. So, we’ve also then lived the ‘wrong meaning’ of what success means and as such you can start figuring out how many of the words we had all at some point desired to achieve, were in fact meanings of words that are not entirely supportive for everyone, but instead only glorify our personal interest without considering what is best for everyone else at the same time.
What I’ve realized that has happened within ourselves is that because taking control/direction of one’s life involves doing the actual work, the investigation, the discipline to lay out plans and test out ways to genuinely empower oneself and make things work within a supportive context, we all have (un)consciously decided to take the ‘easy route’ wherein a handful of individuals that were noticeably cunning in ways to get the most for themselves by using tricks, deception and lies that ‘sell well’ have been able to make their fortunes based on OUR complacency, our ignorance, our irresponsibility, gullibility and law of the least effort which is precisely the point of disempowerment we have grown into ourselves like the actual cancer that takes us into the mentality of ‘oh well we are never going to be powerful enough like ‘the elite’ to change things, so let’s just keep having a good time’ And in this, we are only accepting the manufactured consent to remain in our own little cages, living in con-fine-ments of houses/rooms where we simply believe that ‘it’s the life I had to live’ / ‘God wanted me to learn these lessons’ / ‘this is how life is/ I simply have to make things work and let things flow’ when in fact all of these are nothing else but excuses and justifications to not stand up for ourselves.
What we haven’t realized is that ‘The Power’ / Our Power in itself is always HERE in and as each one of us in our ability to decide to precisely no longer ‘follow the leader’ but rather questioning the leader, questioning the governments, questioning the entire hierarchical structure we live in, questioning the benefits we have endowed to some within a belief structure called politics, religion, class systems, races, we have to ponder our abilities and restrictions and so within doing that coming to the realization that we’ve bought a great lie wherein we believed all along that ‘we are disempowered’ and so within this,actually disenfranchising ourselves from our living rights – but we aren’t really, we have just been – let me be frank – too lazy, too apathetic, too idle to take responsibility for making things work and be beneficial not only for ourselves but for everyone else too.
Disempowerment toward Politics/Politicians
A point in my life I’ve felt disempowerment is when witnessing abuse and this is how this word then came up. Within this what I have created is the belief that the point of abuse is ‘so out there, out of my reach’ that ‘I can’t do anything about it’ but this is also an excuse and justification, a fallacy in fact because in this we believe that that which I am witnessing as a point of abuse is ‘outside of myself’ and if we are human beings, we all have a mind, a body and so we can all rather begin realizing that IF another human being was able to commit such abuse THEN I as another human being can investigate, understand such abuse, trace the origin point, source it, understand it and rather learn how it was originated so that I can focus on preventing the situations and accumulation of behaviors, circumstances internally and externally that propitiate a situation of abuse.
A classic point of disempowerment I lived throughout my life was when witnessing and/or getting information about the corruption in politics – hence my ‘loathing politics’ experience – and so believing that those people ‘in power’ were simply doing what they willed themselves to because ‘they could’ because they were in the position to do so, and so this ‘position’ point became the limitation: their money, their knowledge, their relationships, their names, their families, etc. So in this all that I learned to create is anger, aversion and a general desire to ‘have nothing to do with politics’ or with money, or with getting a good position in the system, because ‘I hated it’ but in fact this is what makes us All disempowered, when we already see ourselves wanting to deny that which we see or believe to be ‘too high’ / ‘too far away from my reach to change’.
Furthermore I realized how I created such aversion/hatred toward politics because I realized that instead of political platforms existing to regulate our lives and support everyone as equals, the opposite is what drives politics at the moment. And so, this experience of ‘hatred’ as my emotional reaction for not getting the expected support from politicians and politics in general to support our societies, so that is why it is My responsibility to stop my own experience of hatred that leads to the belief of me being disempowered in my ability to change things, to change the world-system and my reality – little did I know or was aware of how it is that in this moment I actually swallowed the belief that ‘I can’t do anything if I am not in that position of power’ which is the first way in which we go ‘tagging’ ourselves, defining each other as either powerful or disempowered individuals in society, all by the amount of money, of influence, of powerful family relationships, of studies, of properties etc. all of it consolidating the same fallacious definition of power as an actual abuse upon the rest that do not have equal access to what the ‘empowered’ has.
So, what I’ve done since then after many years of contempt and aversion and antagonizing and even mocking politicians, I came to focus on my responsibility to change myself first, which means going from this belief of disempowerment to an actual self-empowerment which is nothing else but taking responsibility for myself, for the education that I half-way received about how the world actually functions and getting to see a fuller picture, to understand who really ‘runs the world’ – or what really runs the world as the money-construct – and how the actual way to implement change is through politics. From there I walked an entire process of clearing up the word politics for myself so that I no longer bring up this mental image of men in suits sitting on a chamber of congress making decisions behind closed doors while eating caviar and sipping champagne, abusing women and children and joking about the poor that have fun with bread and circus. So, this means that I started rather investigating what are the actual forces that drive our reality, who are our government, how have ‘they’ been also created as part of an enclosed system of rich and poor, what is it that we have missed in our reality that we have abdicated our entire organization to a handful that only look after their own benefit, all of this means: where is My responsibility to the world system in fact.
And so upon discovering and understanding some of the greatest lies in our entire history like how money is created and the purpose of our education, what our foods contain, the type of devaluation of dignity that entertainment represents, the warfare industry, the general commodification of life then became a solid starting point for me to realize that I am not really ‘disempowered’ because I can investigate and certainly I can then through understanding the problem also propose solutions, which didn’t come as easy either, because I had to then walk through my very own definitions of ‘value’ and money as as the current representation of the relationship of abuse toward one another, and the rest of the constructs that we have all collectively agreed upon as a ‘default’ point from birth.
So, no one said it is going to be ‘easy’ to actually conduct the changes required due to the time, the effort, the money that is required for it and the group of people that will only make it happen through unity as the real form of empowerment one by one – though the first point is recognizing that ‘I can’ and this is no hopeful-positive thinking political slogan situation just like ‘yes we can’ that have been used to get presidential candidates into office. No. this is about genuinely becoming aware of how we can investigate, understand the problem and so walk it through to a solution beginning with ourselves, which means stopping the patterns of apathy, aversion, hatred, judgment and more so Blame toward ‘those that I believe are in power’
So what is real power then?
Power is the ability to recognize that ‘I can’, that ‘I am able,’ that I can direct myself and become an individual that no longer is mentally driven by seeking the kind of abuse (false archetype of power we just discussed) as a form of personal gain called ‘success,’ but instead that I can change myself to become an individual that can demonstrate that the ‘order’ in this world is flawed and that it must be changed – but how can ‘it’ all be changed if we keep living in a bubble called the personal belief of being ‘disempowered’?
In this case, proposing self-education to understand our individual responsibility to our lives and how within doing that we will come to realize that the current system is unsustainable and so, we can also join in with our new awareness to propose solutions that can change the way we currently live in. So here we are then crossing the line from the ‘disempowered’ member of society that sees ‘no way out’ to the individual that sees that the way out is precisely through recognizing that I Can/ I am Able to understand the problem and so within understanding also conduct changes within ourselves first – and this is very, very important because most of the ‘activism’ that takes place is entirely conducted or ‘aiming’ at ‘changing others’ which is entirely futile really. Isn’t it such a common phrase to say: “be the change that you want to see in the world”? Well, this means apply, live the principles to be and become such change, instead of understanding such phrase as in ‘being the one that demands change’ or some other way to deviate from the point of responsibility.
We can and are able to recognize our power, our ability to change things, which is not really something ‘outside of ourselves’ but recognizing our ability to act according to what we see is and would be best for everyone, which also is what we can also define as taking self-responsibility leading to actual self-empowerment. This is a process where we go recognizing that as we take matters into our own hands, we then go dropping all the fallacies, the deception, the belief systems that we had held ourselves imprisoned by. And it is more than necessary today to begin letting go of this idea and Experience of ‘feeling disempowered’ and instead, rather flag-it and see it as the excuse this word ‘disempowerment’ is and represents to not take responsibility, to not recognize that I CAN Stop and Prevent such point of Abuse within myself by recognizing my equal-capability of understanding the problem/ the point of abuse and directing it toward a solution.
If we don’t do this, then who will?
We have gotten ourselves to this point because we just were too complacent – too lazy – to actually take our lives into our own hands, but instead we delegated our power, our ‘I can’ for myself in the hands of a few that obviously have abused it tremendously as it had to be, otherwise if they had been benevolent beings that ‘took care of it all,’ then maybe we would have never really even considered how it is ourselves that should take responsibility for ourselves first and foremost and so one by one waking up to this realization, we will live in an actual self-governance, a self-direction, I direct me as my mind and my body to do/conduct and direct myself to prevent/stop this point of abuse and so correct the ways, behaviors, patterns toward a best for all outcome.
This is a process of self creation and self-empowerment is then the ability to recognize that I can, I am able to, and more so recognizing this not as a fleeting moment of positivity, but an actual continued, constant and diligent process of redefining our words such as ‘power’ and live the ‘I can’ and ‘I am able to’ direct myself in reality, seeing where we still believe ‘we can’t’ and so pushing ourselves to really test it out – can’t we really? do we fear something? Is there a reality point, a potential consequence that I could create if I do this? Of course within the current boundaries of what this physical reality implies when it comes to laws of physics and the rest of the system we have to stick to at the moment – all done in a supportive, peaceful, non-aggressive manner – always considering what is best for all which implies: no harm, no abuse.
Change isn’t a magical overnight thing, it is a rather long continued process of self-movement to stop and prevent the same patterns of abuse that are manifested consequences of thousands of years! So it is about first becoming such living principle of what it means to live words that are self-supportive and so see how as we share and live with each other, we can go creating agreements that we can physically in real time test out work to live in a way that is beneficial for all – and so by doing this and living this realization in ‘real time’ then, we actually go empowering ourselves and each other to realize: we actually have the power to change, and that Is empowering.
So, it’s time to empower ourselves and each other recognizing that We Can and so lay out the plan on how one is going to live such ability/power every single day to change oneself and live in self-responsibility which then becomes a form of freedom too from the accepted and allowed mind-control belief of ‘we are too little to change’ –Time to grow up!
From Self Victimization to Self Empowerment – 2013 – The Future of Consciousness – Part 38
Self-Empowerment and Expansion with Desteni:
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Today August 11th, 2013 Bernard Poolman Died and it’s quite the most shocking news you can get on what one would expect to be the most regular Sunday morning on Earth, it wasn’t and I agree with Cerise’s statement My Dad, The Devil: the world is more poor without him.
I must begin with saying that I have never known what to say when people die, and have only attended one single funeral that wasn’t even from a family member but my mother’s best friend and every time I got to know someone was dead I just could not know what to say or if I should ‘feel’ anything – well today I got a more direct experience of that for the first time. I am 26 years old and have never lost anyone as close to me until today yet I wipe the tears and continue to stand because I’ve gotten more than enough support from him to now be where I am standing today: writing the new contract I’ve acquired with life, walking the process to stand equal and one to the words lived by him as the walking living flesh he was, a man that has been hated by people that are willing to abuse and deny the responsibility we have in this world and deny what is required to be done on Earth, but at the same time revered by all of us that are grateful for every single moment he would share what would be Here to be shared, in the moment – no preparation, no scripts, no nothing – and to me it was more than an honor to be able to directly collaborate in being the hands that type out what he would so fluently speak out and yes, that will be no more – but the words are still here and now to be lived by each one of us since it is what we are here to be and become: stand equal to the living principle he embodied, that’s what he really was and continues to Be.
When approaching the Desteni Forum for the first time, we got to see posts by ‘Eagle,’ an individual that would post all videos and continually respond to every single post that was made in such a riddled yet clear cut way that only through reading such words it was like opening my brain to a whole new window that I knew it was there, but somehow it was marvelously placed in such directive simple ways that I immediately knew I’d like to someday be able to directly see the points, which was also learned through all of the replies posted on the DesteniProductions Channels (2007-2011). Later on Eagle became Common Sense and as I begun to participate in the Private Forum in march 2008, I can say that I’ve been tremendously assisted by all the chats conducted by Bernard from that time wherein I’ve learned of the miles of words shared by him, Sunette/Dimensions and everyone else that have contributed with as an essential part of walking the Desteni Process: the support we got at the forum until our very last chat with Bernard this week is something that remains as one of the best dynamites a human being can ever detonate within an indoctrinated mind shaped in the image and likeness of a system of self-abuse, only to make space for genuine living foundations based on living principles
My initial admiration for Bernard as the words/principles he spoke of later on became a realization of how what he embodied as the Principled Living on Earth, wasn’t about something ‘superior’ or ‘special’ but actually simply living by the principles he spoke of, the actions he lived and the relationships he formed that are the genuine examples that we have as a testimony of a new way of living for humanity if we so want to continue living in this world. He said it best: “Self honesty is not nice or beautiful” and this became a key quote for me to continually remind myself that the sugar and spice type of life we had all been taught to seek and follow was always a Lie. I resonated with this very clearly which is why I resonated a lot to the words he spoke of, he was wording out what I had seen but merely allowed to ‘pass by’ and now being aware of this had a definitive cause and direction: to expose the lies, to learn how to Self Forgive and walk an individual process of Integrity, Self Respect, Honor and most importantly getting rid of all the bullshit that usually keeps us busy in the mind – I certainly learned to appreciate myself and stand as the reality of who I really am and conduct my potential. I didn’t have many conversations with him while at the farm other than very specific points to be discussed and somehow I see that I didn’t entirely open myself up back then as I was still tip-toeing around it all, not wanting my stuff to be exposed yet understanding that he could see it all.
“Self honesty is not nice or beautiful” – Bernard Poolman
Such a simple statement yet absolutely supportive since we tend to create this idea that process is something great, marvelous, that will turn us into these good doers or even worse righteous gods instantly when it has nothing to o with that, it is genuinely being willing to actually get to know our demon-self, the truth of ourselves, the reality, the nitty-gritty details that we have all always concealed to learn how to ‘make-up’ with flowery words of love and light, and being ‘good’ and eliciting nice experiences upon other individuals without even realizing to what extent – by keeping these masks – we have continued to keep the current hypocrisy and false-value systems that in no way represent a living principle that life should be. Bernard was the living words of every aspect that required to be said in a world where Life is being sold and Equality is a demonized non-living word. He stood as the living principle of the resolution, the integrity, determination, clarity and discipline required to walk this process that we’ve embarked ourselves in within this Process, this Journey to Life that involves the dismantling of this world at all levels, even beyond what our minds can conceive in order to establish a new living contract on Earth, a contract that stipulates through our written word the principles, the responsibility and practical steps to actually change the nature of who we have become as individuals in the mind – every single statement written and later on spoken in interviews by Bernard revealed to us a blueprint of the mess we are in as this world system and our individual reality, due to everything that we have accepted and allowed ourselves to become. He was always writing the raw truth about reality and opening up the necessary self-confrontation necessary to realize one single thing: we are all collectively responsible for everything we are, everything we’ve become in this world and this was done without ever inciting violence, vengeance or retaliation against ‘others,’ without going ‘against the system,’ without having to incite to revolt or do anything ‘extremist’ as some haters would love to claim he did, just to discredit a message that actually challenged their current self-interested ways of ‘living’ while neglecting abuse. Instead Bernard did the absolute opposite, he pointed out something we had been missing all along: in this world we have no enemies other than ourselves, individually, we’ve been screwed by our written words that never have considered life in equality – and this clicked within me as the realization of how blindfolded I had been to always take a stance of antagonism to portray myself as the ‘good person’ without even investigating if such ‘benevolence’ was in fact real – which it obviously wasn’t but only a self-interested mechanism to keep me on ‘good spirits’ while pointing out the flaws in the world. We were pushed to question ourselves if it was in fact the integrity I believed myself to have such as in ‘having nothing to do with the ‘evil’ in the world, without even seeing, realizing an understanding that the very thoughts, pictures, imaginations, intentions, secret desires and future projections stood as the very building blocks of our collective illusion – my empire of dirt was debunked and so I realized how worth-less was it to continue ‘holding on’ to something that had never been in fact an example of what living is all about.
So, Marlena was the girl that got to the farm in an intense desire to be just noticed right away, and he noticed it right away ‘You are still trying to get recognition’ and realized the point an committed myself to walk and learn what humbleness is about. I was insecure, hooked on harmful relationships, fearing, not wanting to ‘get out and be seen,’ hiding my face behind hair– literally – not wanting to make much noise in the internet, not wanting people to know about myself and my process, being regulated by a sense of ‘self preservation’ of ‘what I like, who I am’ and being fearing any form of conflict wherein I may lose the approval of people or any other ‘meaningful’ relationship I believed to have in this world – well all of these aspects have been slowly but surely debunked throughout time by living and applying the example that Bernard stood as along with every other person that begun applying the same tools within this process.
I got to know I was just asking for another confirmation of a ‘changed character’ a ‘bettered version of myself’ when that wasn’t in fact what this process is about, and within an attempt to keep things in a ‘nice way’ I realized I was only creating yet another mask to conceal myself within the Idea of ‘Change’ without genuinely understanding I was ‘playing it safe’ – until later.
‹Bernard› remember that all is self
thus–self awareness, self standing
make all the words with self you direct your self to be and live it and in the mind–you make up reasons why not to do what you will–but fear others like family
dare to live for real
and fix reality to be worthy of you and all other beings here (2008)
Where is Bernard in that group pic? Lol! I was laughing so hard because he was the one taking the pic an making us all laugh (July 2009, Desteni Farm – South Africa)
I am grateful that I was able to visit the farm in 2009 and stay for a year and meet The Most Evil Man on Earth: Bernard Poolman. When I got at the farm he wasn’t home yet and when he arrived the first words were “You’re already Making Noise!” lol because I was just too happy to be finally there and speaking too much with everyone I had already developed relationships with at the forum and being overtly excited about it all, so I greeted with a big hug and from there on, I was in for the experience of my life, I could have never known how much one can learn from another individual and all the people at the farm walking this process as the support it means in order to understand what Living by Principle in fact means in physical reality.
I probably would have liked to be able to be more open toward him while I was there, I was still wanting to stand somehow ‘in the background’ and not stepping up so much forth as I considered others to be more capable than me and I was still holding onto quite a hierarchized way of thinking that is certainly non existent within me at the moment, since I learned how to plant the seed of self-stability, self-authority, self-will, self-respect, practicing the realization of the importance of the written word in a world consumed by contracts of evil as the reverse of life. I certainly got such resolve within myself while being there and remained cultivating it ever since.
At the farm I went through heaven and hell, but the hell must be understood as the necessary as-it-should-be realization that throughout my life I had disregarded essential principles in relation to the ‘who I am’ as ‘my time,’ ‘my preferences,’ ‘wanting to do only what I like/want/feel like doing’ and the consequences that I got to face was the realization of how little was I in fact considering other beings – specially animals in my case – in my reality, but only focusing on this ‘self-enhancement’ without a clear resolve and understanding of what Equality truly means in all practical levels, which lead me to realize coexistence and the equality with all life forms that I had disregarded so far as a part of everything that is here as myself.
What I’ve learned from Bernard is a lot more than what I will express in these lines since every single interaction with him – directly and indirectly – lead me to strengthen, clarify and expand my understanding of this world, life, the visible and invisible yet verifiable in all ways in terms of observing the nature of this reality as our image and likeness, as the fuckup we all signed ourselves to with ink on the flesh as the self that we sold in the name of experience, of energy. Along with this I was able to develop the ability to recognize the actual abilities, skills and talents that I had doubted I could ever develop. I am grateful for the challenges I was able to take on while being at the farm. Lol, there’s this funny moment where one morning Bernard asked ‘Who wants to take a painting project!?’ and Marlen raises hand right away “Meeee!!” and yes oh boy was it not the kind of ‘painting’ I was expecting but an actual challenge of thick brush and rolling painting an entire building lol, which I managed to do with the help here and there of the other guys, man was I proud of myself and according to that immediate ability to respond and stick to my word of ‘getting it done’ in such an apparent simple task, I was able to realize to what extent I had limited myself by my own thoughts of distrust, of doubt and hesitation to speak – slowly but surely I saw that I had only feared being wrong, saying the ‘bad things,’ wanting to be directed/getting orders instead of actually realizing I could develop the common sense and techniques as I go, and this didn’t only apply to the work done at the farm which was already in itself a challenge but also in relation to the ability to commit oneself to do something and Actually Doing-it. Such is the nature of the things I learned at the farm, learned Self Will and a determination I had absolutely no Idea I was able to bring forth and establish as myself, as my expression.
There’s No doubt that all the points I learned from Bernard and others’ interactions with him enabled me to realize that the actual power we have exists in and as every single breath, and how we had to let go of fears to stand in order to be visible, to not be fearful or ashamed in any way of what I am doing and this is something continued to be walked every single day as the fear is no longer there, but the resolve is a constant renewal of existential vows, the reason why we’re doing this is because we have kept ourselves waiting for far too long for someone to ‘show us the way,’ and it is only now within this process and having Bernard’s example that a new living nature of humanity became a living possibility for all of us aware of and walking the Desteni process, which is nothing else than applying the tools that Bernard himself used to become what he became: the living word in flesh.
I’ve described several key moments through my journey in this entire MarlenLife blog of things I learned from him, including the R.I.P God blog wherein I realized the irrelevance of my questions about existence and reality that were based on the same constructs and ideas in separation of myself, detached from any real physical value on Earth.
I was at the Farm when we embarked ourselves in the course that is being now provided as an educational platform of self support for several people that have committed themselves to it: the Desteni I Process – back then the Structural Resonance Alignment (SRA)– and I was one of the first individuals to go through it and have the opportunity to buddy people, learning how to begin trusting my understanding and common sense and placing it into application. I remember also all the times we would have the infamous ‘Interviews from the Farm’ which were usually chats at the lounge are or the veranda with the entire group that was living there where we got some of the greatest lessons one could have ever gotten about the world system, heaven, Earth, the Afterlife, Process, The cure for our Curiosity – it was like story time with real shocking and real supportive facts that are equally available till this day at the article section http://desteni.org/articles/interviews-from-the-farm
I will probably always say how 2009-2010 was the greatest year of my life, and a small part of this is depicted in the following video Here as Life
The most supportive thing was when I was able to be called out for the patterns I was existing as and I am being forever thankful for the support Bernard gave me to see that which I had absolutely neglected and refused to see, up to the point where I walked ‘the death of me’ and assisted myself to more and more grasp what must be done in this process and stand as a point of support for myself and everyone else. The thing is I wasn’t exactly told what to do which was also another point of great support – I took a decision to come back, finish school and continue with my process which has been walked with all the same support we got and continued standing and taking on the point I had resisted the most: the Equal Money System proposal and realized that it was a decision I had made to stand up for something that truly means equalizing the value of Life in this world – along with Bernard’s support we continued to walk all the matrixes of self deception to get back to the point where we have realized no solution on Earth will be possible unless we first focus on the Education of the Human Mind, and this is something I continuously confirmed through and with Bernard every single time which also strengthen the resolution to focus on what we are currently doing: supporting ourselves as we are supporting many others to get past the veils of the mind and be what I have committed myself to be: a Life-Birthing assistant as this is what I received not only from Bernard but Everyone else at Desteni, as the Desteni Group world wide, so we’ll continue to spam the world with common sense and self honesty.
I had few moments of being with him alone, and our conversations were always very directive lol which is cool in a way because that’s how I got to see that I didn’t have to ‘beat around the bush’ and go straight to the facts, get past the emotional bs and focus on the practical directions. I must say that I had kept still a veil toward him until the past months where he became more than just a living example but also a buddy, a colleague, someone I could share and laugh with at the nonsense of the world and always bringing it back to a solution – all was clear and a constant confirmation of the common sense learned and developed through living and applying the example that he has provided us all with. I will miss that interaction, but again as the clarity that is here as I write these words, I realize that he exists As the Words we will continue to write, live and stand one and equal to, where “Bernard”ceases to exist as a name and memory only and becomes part of who we are as the words we live, standing as an example and living expression that we decided to take on from him and expand through, walking through the systems until we all realize our actual potential and live it out, because that’s what he was able to see within every single individual that had the decision to walk this process of self support. Yes never in my life had I lived with such unconditional beings at the farm and him being the example of what it is to support another the way we would like to be supported ourselves, not expecting anything in return other than the ability to stand on our own two feet, standing side by side as who he is.
I had great laughs with him as well, I particularly enjoyed all the moments of laughter because he had this great sense of humor, lol everyone should have been able to listen to his characterization of the American accent or when he would approach beings at the gas station, the supermarket and ask them about god and money and what would they prefer to keep if they had the option – lol! But I also got to witness first hand the actual physical process he was going through, I witnessed the amount of pain he would endure on a daily basis due to the systems taken on by him as part of his process. I would become worried about it, I wanted to be a solution to ease his pain and he only said: keep breathing and that is already a cool thing for me – and so I will continue until the last one I give myself. He explained to me how that was his point in process and how I would do the same in his shoes – I said Yes, and continue to confirm I stand within the resolution and self will I learned from him, a genuine example of what it is to stand by principle, doing all that he could, no matter what and never make a big fuzz about it, but learn how to breathe through it, within the understanding of what must be done here in this world.
I learned how to stand up to my own self-abuse, to slowly but surely get past the trivial aspects that I had held myself a victim toward or apathetic about and be able to integrate living principles that are absolutely non existent in a reality where we abuse life in the name of power as money, in a world where a single value system has become our image and likeness of desires, wants, needs and imaginations that only benefit ourselves, disregarding the consideration of how the abuse on Earth is not built only through/due to money, but the relationships, the contracts, the profiles, the pictures we’ve created within our reality.
I learned what Equality means in physical practical terms, what the equation of 1+1=2 meant and I can now laugh a a bit at myself when we were discussing the Equal Money System back in 2009 and I remember asking him: but what will be the value of money then? And he simply said: Life. Eureka! a whole new world was able to be realized just because it revealed to me what kind of religion our political, economic an political systems had become. I also learned how to give myself direction and take on greater responsibilities within the group, which is something I had held myself back from doing just because of those initial fears and seeing the points as separate from me – yet when realizing the principles required for it, one can certainly develop this resolve as we go integrating the living principles necessary to establish self-trust and be able to genuinely begin living without the constant desire to ‘return to my safe cave’ and ‘forget about this ever happening’ – such point cannot exist when one realizes the extent of the problem we’re facing in this world and existence and the responsibility we hold toward every single word, every single screwed up relationship we’ve established as the reverse of Life and how we must stand up to genuinely correct the damage we’ve done to ourselves and every other living particle we’ve taken for granted as part of ourselves.
My resolve to this process is to establish the living principles he stood as the way I have been walking for the past 5 years, of course I require to strengthen my ability to see beyond the ‘downfalls’ when we see there is no way out, because we both agreed that there is always a way out and that is how one can always see solutions where I once only saw gloom and doom, death and destruction.
After these years of having walked the placement and development of economic, political and social systems applying the principles he shared with us, I realize the importance of first beginning to establish a living common sensical understanding and application of all of these principles and actually living them, embodying them as the way we relate to ourselves, to one another, and stand as that pillar of support to others to o the same because I can see that we require each other to make this work and this is how more than this being about Bernard is about the living principles of self integrity, honor, self respect that we will continue to live and apply toward one another, being grateful for the existence of human beings around the world that as myself are able to Hear his words and commit ourselves to be the examples that this world has yet to realize we are all able to be and become, when we start honoring life and ensuring that we live the words and walk the way forward.
Thank you Bernard! I will be forever grateful but more than that, we got to now stand as the principles you left and not be a only a follower – we’re ready and capable of this. Let’s do it!
Also check out:
Mantis on Bernard’s hand (2009)
Support for Destonians:
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- Desteni Articles
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And don’t forget to watch Bernard’s favorite besides Coffee: The Century of the Self
Thank you all for reading and walking with, let’s continue honoring each other.
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We have had great statements and bills of rights throughout history declaring that “All human beings are created equal” but, are any of these documents, constitutions and declarations being implemented in reality? No.
Is any International Organization taking care of and ensuring that every single being in this world is being granted every basic necessity to live in dignity? No
Is any International Organization and/or Institution ensuring that all resources of the Earth are being distributed in a equal manner to all individuals? No
Are there any International Organizations or NGO supervising that the production processes of our goods are ecologically sustainable and aligned to protocols of highest quality standards with non-polluting mechanisms to ensure that no animals, plants and human beings are harmed in the process of providing for ourselves that which we need to live? No
Many could claim while reading these principles ‘That would be too much to ask’ when all of these aspects should be in fact the very Basic Living Principles we all should direct our lives with, but there is one single reason why we don’t: Money and the desire for some to be inherently given the the most of it over others to keep inequality in place, just because while the majority of the people are hooked on a survival mechanism to barely have enough to eat, there’s a minority that benefit from being the ‘job providers’ to enable those that have non to earn a bit of money to be able to live, without realizing that it is those in power as the minority that have the control over resources and all other financial institutions at their disposal to live like kings and queens. This is what we have collectively accepted and allowed
So it is about time we establish our Basic Living Principles of Equality as Life as Human Rights for the first time at a Global Level and Not leave this process in the hands of a few organisms that have proven themselves to be inaccurate to fund and establish Equality as Constitutional Principle in all nations of this world. We as individuals, we as the people of the world are the ones that must take this task at hand, as it is in our best interest that we all support each other to implement the living conditions that will ensure our well being is guarded in Equality to everyone else’s by virtue of being alive.
International Organization comprises mechanisms and organisms like the United Nations and International Law which is a collection of international norms, which are enforced via the United Nations – where such norms and dispositions were supposed to be guiding and directing our lives to a common well being, such as guaranteeing that every individual would have ‘Equal Rights’ – however it’s already been over half a century that these Human Rights have been promulgated and the state of the world is subsumed in far more abusive, violent and exploitative state than the Second World War period in itself. We live in a world where two thirds of the population live in poverty, where 25 thousand children die each day of starvation and preventable diseases, where 1 billion people have No toilets, where children are sold and trafficked for slavery and sexual commerce purposes, where our Education is an indoctrination mechanism to keep everyone bound to a slavery position with capped abilities to in fact have any chance of living in a dignified manner; poverty has not ceased to exist, CEO’s in companies are earning thousands of times more than the average worker per hour, our Earth’s resources are being turned into fuel and cash to continue our ‘economic growth’ and ‘elevating’ our lifestyles to an unsustainable rate of destruction, erosion and full blown predation that we have ensued in our world with no remedy on sight, because ‘Money makes the rules of the game,’ and those who made the rules are the ones that ensure no solution is placed for their own interests rely on the abuse of those that are yelling out for help and support – this is the reality we have all accepted and allowed and as such, equally responsible for.
The creation of the United Nations was intended to establish organization and promote cooperation between nations to minimize the violent conflicts after the Second World War which means establishing peace; but at the same time, they left the allowance of organized armies to be part of the necessary ‘Security’ that is till this day existent as an acceptable form of defense in a world where war is still a means to ‘reactivate’ economy and gain more power over others – yes, no evolution has taken place in our global organization. Apparently the UN would pair up to organize and intervene with the Economic aspect necessary to precisely ensure the enforcement or implementation of the basic Human Rights. However the economical and financial organization was left to the International Institutions like IMF, World Bank and others which had Nothing to do with working par en par with the Declaration of Human Rights by the UN. Even if the same countries that funded the UN, the interests of International Organizations have nothing to do with establishing, for example, an economic system based on supporting every individual with sufficient money to live – this has Never been a Human Right Per se.
One of the aspects or mechanisms within International Law has to do with Human Rights and it’s supposed to be the ‘key area’ of it, but just as the UN, its main focus in fact has to do with the law of the sea/ admiralty law which has to do with organizing the commerce and corporate powers at an international level, laws that regulate war and peace and protecting crimes against humanity, however it hasn’t been resolved to identify the monetary system in itself and the banking system as well schemed and internationally accepted crimes against humanity from the moment that having money or not defines whether you live or you die.
The problem and reality of these organizations and groups of laws is that there is no international agreement to follow the International Laws nor the implementation of these rights is enforced by any means, simply because there is no sovereign to coerce compliance. Unfortunately in our current world and reality, the application of laws and declarations that benefit people have only been possible by coercive mode where sanctions are imposed onto countries when not abiding to this, but the reality is that because there is no money involved in these International Organizations and Orders, it all remains at a diplomatic level with no implementation at all but mere agreement with no practical application.
The people that suffer the ‘disagreements’ at an economic and political level internationally are the ones that actually have to endure this negligence. We know about these Human Rights organizations at municipal, state and national levels where one can complain about some form of injustice being imposed by our very own governments, corporations or any other public service – however there’s no compromise at a governmental or financial institutions to comply to this declaration to support the implementation of it to ensure that Human Rights are in fact lived in practical living reality as the way business are conducted, social securities are given– these documents have become dead letters because there is no acting to ensure these rights are in fact lived.
The reality is that that this ‘equal footing’ is impossible to exist between nations and individuals when money dictates a nation’s stance in the international context; this means that if a country is existing in absolute poverty, there is no law that dictates that those that have more wealth give to the poorest ones or support these International Organizations to conduct their aims and mission to have means to implement the basic human rights around the world. But because there is no obligation to it even if the states might shape their behavior in response to these International Laws and Organizations, they will still violate the laws and principles because Money dictates the willingness to trespass these basic agreements to respect life at all levels – instead money rules and money decides to what extent we are wiling to go in order to satisfy the interests of a few in a world of Inequality.
The International System must be reorganized where all non-state actors become also part of the changes in the distribution of power. All organizations intended to create solutions to all the above mentioned problems will have to unite under the premise of establishing Life in Equality at a Constitutional Level in all Nations/Estates. The International Institutions like the IMF and World Bank must enhance the necessary coordination at an economic level to ensure the integration and recognition of the Declaration of Human Rights and direct the necessary changes in the way the monetary system, the financial and banking systems operate in order to equalize to this new living principle at a Global Level.
All International Institutions that handle that establish the economic principles at a global level must provide the necessary means to establish Equality through Money. This will imply the restructuring of our current monetary system to change it from a system of debt to a parity of physical life value where money can exist as the representation of the rights to have access to the necessary means to live and as such, ensure that through providing Equal Money to all individuals the Equality principle promulgated in all our Constitutions and Human Rights Declaration is in fact applied; this means that the Distribution of Power will have to be Equalized to ensure that States don’t pursue hegemony or forcing compliance of small states to serve the ‘bigger’ ones. The Balance of Power which means an impending tolerance between nations wherein cooperation was defined as alliances to wage war and/or secure some territories to continue the absolute power over others. It is the Time when History has to be brought to a Halt and instead, give way to Equality as Life as a Principle under which all Nations and International Organizations will align all trade, migration, social integration, mutually inclusive interests between nations to establish peace, cooperation and the provision of support for all inhabitants in certain nations where support has been neglected throughout time, it is a priority to first support all the nations and people in need and ensure that Equality means obtaining a dignified living condition equal to the best possible and sustainable one already existent in what we have defined as a first world country, that is the Equality as what’s Best for All that we all have to aim with certain corrections and alignments to ensure it is sustainable at all times.
The process of Globalization benefit the binding and connection between individuals and nations wherein it is not only a mechanical or strategic solidarity that exists between nations and individuals due to proximity, but also an organic one based on the ability to communicate with great ease nowadays thanks to the internet and other means of communication that are already having political implications. By establishing an International Organization that appeals to the United Nations the implementation of Basic Human Rights through democratic means – we can use the emerging E-Democracy to establish an actual political foundation where all individuals with access to the internet can participate and actively ensure that the distribution of resources necessary to Equalize the Life of Individuals is in fact taking place. This will be supervised and ensured by all of us the individuals of the world, because as long as we don’t live and integrate the principle and premise which is to establish life in equality, we we will continue to exist in separation and in the verge of collapse – this can’t continue going on as it is now; we have to come together and integrate ourselves with one common goal, that which exists within us all beyond language, tradition, culture, race, gender, preferences, religions, political affiliations –this is about recognizing the necessity that we all have for the basic means to live in a dignified manner.
To Read more about the Fundamental Basic Human Rights:
International Politics and its purpose must be to advance the cause of Equality as Ius Cogens for all individuals in every nation – this implies that the principle of Equality as Life is so fundamental that no convention or custom can violate it. International Organizations like the UN must now prioritize lifting continents out of poverty to ensure the equal well being of all living beings in this planet, working with and cooperating with governments and the necessary banking and financial institutions to create structures and mechanisms that can be integrated/ adopted by each nation in order to guarantee basic economic support. This will include the necessary intervention and regulation of corporations and governments to ensure that all profit made and taxes gathered by governments are equally destined to support all individuals in the respective nations, as well as directing sufficient support for those that currently have no means to create any form of profit. This is one aspect in which the governments or any other International Institution must take the role of implementing the necessary measures to create a Global Equal State where Money is equalized as Life.
The Focus of the implementation of Human Rights must be at a Global Level ensued by all participants of this world that recognize the immediate need to establish a better living condition to everyone on Earth that is currently suffering the draconian measures with which we have accepted and allowed to direct our lives in this world. An International Organization that is not created by specific countries and/or individuals, nor funded by corporations or specific actors that could shape the process of establishing Equal Rights according to the benefit of a few must be established. The approach to implement Basic Human Rights is Equality as What is Best for All where no preferences and/or mutually exclusive interests maim the ability to coexist as individuals in One World in Equality which ensures every inhabitant of the planet is being guarded and supported to with Equal Money to have all the food, water, shelter, proper sustenance, education, entertainment as all the freedoms that each individual will be born into by virtue of coming into this Equality Principled World, which is the world where you and I for sure would like to be born into – this is our opportunity to create it.
Equal Money System exists in conjunction with the Equal Life Foundation’s principles and proposals, which is the International Organization that will conduct the necessary actions and democratic mechanisms to establish the proposal for Constitutional Equality in every country – we realize that the current events and conditions of this world is demanding that we reclaim the right to life, the right to the Earth’s resources as our own to support all Individuals in Equality.
“The Equal Life Foundation is a Non-Profit Organization that focus on Redefining Human Rights to Result in Rights that Produce, at an Individual Level and a Global Level, a Result that is Best for Every Individual in the World; instead of having Multiple Different Organizations trying to do something, acting like Charities, being Controlled by the People that Donate to them – this is One Organization that Handles All of it and it’s Not a Charity. That means: We are Not Dependent on Donations. It Functions like a Business and is thus Self-Funded to Make Sure that there is No External Corporations that has a Say in Policy, firstly and secondly, because the Human does Not Like Donating unless they ‘Feel Bad’ about something. What we are doing is Producing the Ultimate Good so, You do not Get Donations for the Ultimate Good – and therefore: Donations is virtually Non-Existent within the Equal Life Foundation, with Very Little coming in that format.
It is a Non-Profit Organization, because it’s Protecting the Income to Not Go to Any Individual, but to Remain Within the Organization so that it can Focus on its Core Intent, its Objective to bring about a Constitutional Human Rights Dispensation that is Best for Everyone on Earth.”
DAY 362: Human Rights and the Equal Life Foundation – Bernard Poolman –
“The majority on Earth actually have the Legitimate Power to Bring about a Constitutional Change in the World in Every Country that will Protect Basic Human Rights in Every Way – that’s through Democracy. By Voting and Establishing Political Parties Based on Constitutional Equality, the Equality that is based on the Fact that All Life is Equal and therefore: there are certain Intrinsic Human Rights that Supports this Equal Life of All that Must be, by Virtue of Birth, as a Birth Right, which is a Human Right – be Available to Everyone.”
–Day 363: Basic Human Rights and Crime (Part One) – Bernard Poolman
The Establishment of an International Organization that is not linked to specific countries in means of sustaining particular preferential powers is an absolute change from our current world order. We will either appeal to the United Nations to adopt the New Declaration of Human Rights created by and through the Equal Life Foundation and any other organization that wants to join in advocating Equality as Life through the establishment of a new Economic and Political system that ensures the guarantee of each individual’s well being being by the necessary legal and financial mechanisms that we can all be participants of, to never again delegate our rights to a few but instead become active participants to sculpt the society that we all want to live in and leave to our children to come.
We will cease to accept and allow the existence of the UN as only a control and coercion mechanism over countries as well as maintaining the allowance of wars to enrich the states that conform such organization. We as the people of the world will become one single International Organization where no country is less than another, where no individual has veto power over others, and where we all will cooperate in funding the equal support required to uplift the lives of all individuals. No financial entities or corporate endowed NGO’s will exist, because everyone that in fact and genuinely support Equality as Life will join the Equal Life Foundation – and the proposal for an Equal Money System to ensure all our lives are guaranteed to be lived in the most optimum manner possible for all.
This is the first time thus that the creation of a Declaration of Human Rights will be expressed by the people of the world – not only a nation, not as a form of insurrection or in means of overthrowing the government/ the current people in power, but instead it will serve as a declaration to oblige all nations to agree to support all life equally and to dedicate the efforts and economic support to restore and/or equalize every single being’s live to the best living condition that is possible and sustainable in every country.
The poor countries, the ‘forgotten ones’ will be the first ones to be supported and given all the necessary labor force and economic force to uplift their lives to a dignified position so that we can all finally realize that it is only when seeing every single person in this world living in the best possible manner that genuine happiness in this world can exist, genuine wellbeing and peace on Earth will reign – it won’t be a magical act of healing, we have to all actively support to establish the necessary means and methods to create sustainable systems that can be operated by the people to also integrate people to be to create and maintain the new living systems where money will become the surety to our wellbeing and eventually realize that this is all about learning how to Live as Equals, Give as We would Like to Receive, Honor Each Other as the Life that we consist of and learn to live the word Love in fact which is establishing Life in Equality for all in this world and suffer nevermore.
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The solution to transform the way we direct ourselves resides in a complete redefinition of our participation in the system where we will all have to become participants in the matters that make our lives possible. We will have to step up, recognize our ability to stand together as Self-Governed individuals and ensure each one of us becomes the Self Directive Principle in our minds, our physical bodies, and commit our life and spirit to live in absolute integrity in accordance to the Law of our Being, which is Life in Equality as What is Best for all – this is the Living State that we can form at a Global level where one by one we stand as living, self responsible and mutually supportive individuals that ensure we are never again subject to anyone’s terms and conditions, and instead stand as our Individual yet Equal Living Principle as Life, where no policing, no punishment nor rewards will be required – only a constant sound and stable commitment by all to Live to Create what is Best for All.
Throughout history we have being ruled by the so-called ‘Divine Powers’ that were endowed to people in the elites/ royalties that became our governments, monarchs, kings and authorities – all of these entities formed the necessary platforms that enabled and ensured to protect and perpetuate such ‘special powers’ to govern in the hands of a few in order to maintain control upon the rest of humanity and be benefited by it. All of this went on throughout time by our own acceptance and allowance – we all have lived the consequences of these ‘orders’ but we have never really conducted ourselves to create a fundamental change in these power structures to generate a solution from the root/cause of the problem which begun the moment we delegated our individual responsibilities to others, by virtue of the ‘endowed divine powers’ that the majority held as true.
From the beginning, these governmental structures were not meant to be supportive for humanity, we wanted to believe they were – or at least it said so in the constitutions and bills of rights – but it never was never in fact lived and applied. The evidence of that is ever present in every single country that we live in where the same patterns repeat as the construct it is: there’s corruption, misuse of the public funds, nepotism, despotism, laws that are the result of lobbying processes by the corporations to suit their interests, taxes that fund wars, creation of banks and corporations outside of any form of regulation, education that is merely systematic indoctrination, no real variety in the ability to vote in genuine elections because the choices are inherently fixed and flawed, no free and best quality public services like health, infrastructure, telecommunications, banking systems… instead everything is being privatized to make of our basic living necessities just another profitable business that we all dependent on.
Our governments became the actual malevolent act in our society instead of having been the exact opposite according to its main function to direct the people to a common wellbeing. In reality we are and have been in fact Enslaved by our governments as the structure that we have all complied to for thousands of years on without much question, since this was part of the inherent programming that we also accepted and allowed as our own mind consciousness system wherein these structures existed as our very thoughts, beliefs, feelings and emotions that we accepted an d allowed ourselves to believe are ‘who we are.’ This is what leads us to actually question the following: how can we blame other human beings for doing what they did if we all collectively participated in this preprogrammed life paths wherein by default some would play the role of the elite/kings/masters/priests that hold the money and the knowledge while others had to form part of the ‘base of the pyramid’ as the slaves that had to work for these governments that were never in fact existent to uplift the lives of all humans in equality.
This is how it is rather foolish to blame the structure, the system and the people that filled-in such necessary positions, without looking at the greater picture of this reality existing as an all encompassing set-up for human enslavement. The government as the necessary structure of control was established by people that merely ‘played their part’ within a greater scheme in which all human beings – no exceptions – have been part of the necessary places to control and enslave everyone and everyone having agreed to that without a question, because we too believed we could get to be part of the privileged ones someday as the elites, royals and people in power/ money and control over others. All of this has been revealed in the recent years, and it goes hand in hand with the ability to now have sufficient certainty on us as humanity no longer being bound to a system of control, there are no gods anymore directing this reality show but ourselves and our world systems like the monetary and governmental one. This is how the emergence of the Equal Money System has taken place where we let the world know that we are the only ones directing the system and continuing it now, we are the ones that have perpetuated it and as such, we have the ability to change it, because we accepted, allowed and re-created the problem in the first place.
However, most of the people in this world are absolutely lost in the power-games that we’ve lived by throughout thousands of years – it is clear that it will take time for us to educate ourselves about how it is that we have limited our ability to govern ourselves because of having been so used to existing ‘under the direction of’ somebody else’ to take care of our lives. Government can mean ‘mind control’ and this is precisely what we have done thus far: we all accepted and allowed a structure of power and control to dictate our lives, therefore it is not to blame only a few for this, but instead understanding how we did it, why we did it and most importantly how it is that the ability to reconstitute ourselves is in our hands.
This is how we can’t blame the government for ‘not doing its job’ – we haven’t just ben sufficiently informed to realize that it was never the real intention of any elite/ governing class to better the lives of the people – this is directly linked with the hierarchical structures of religion wherein money became the new god in our reality that still has the power to decide upon our very own lives and well being. This is why no government has worked to be an example that can be applicable to all, this is why all governments have had exclusive interests on the monetary side rather than focusing on supporting people’s lives to be supported to exist in the best way possible. It should be quite obvious by now that there has never been a genuine intention to establish life in equality – this is why we’ve had all these various forms of government that have only served the interests of those that implement them. It is about time we realize that we are the ones that have accepted and allowed the governments that we have by our individual abdication of Self Responsibility.
Self Governance is the ability to direct ourselves according to the Law of our Being: Equality and Oneness as Life. This means that there can be no god, no patriarch, no leader, no government as a separate entity ‘above us’ dictating the way that we should all live by – Our ‘Government’ will be existent as the joint effort of each individual existing in Self-Governance. This means that each individual will be educated to take individual responsibility for everything that the governments were intended to do. Governments won’t exist as a selected group of ‘powerful decision makers,’ it will only be a group of people that can be proposed to supervise the efficiency of the system according to their particular skills and abilities, their lifetime experiences or being experts in certain areas to ensure that everything is running according to that which ensures the best living quality of life is produced and sustained by all the various sectors of our societies that make our lives possible.
This is a sui generis form of ‘governance,’ it has no previous parallel or point of comparison to any other regime existent in the past, because these individuals as overseers won’t form part of a ‘superior elite’ trained to rule over others, nor will anyone be specifically proposed as a governor/ president according to particular groups’ interests – No, government will exist as the individual self directive process to always create and generate that which is best for all life – one by one. This will be possible as the ability of each individual to stand in Self Responsibility, Self Honesty, Integrity and Self Will to ensure that everything that we do and conduct ourselves to live by as a society, is leading to a certain best for all outcome through direct democratic processes that will facilitate our direct participation more so than any other previous electoral process – the old structure of two or more choices to vote for people will cease to exist as such. What we will vote on is the ways in which we want to direct ourselves according to what we will be informed and sufficiently educated to understand will lead to a best for all outcome. This will be a matter of scientific and mathematical fact rather than any other form of preference since we will be dealing with physical reality systems to manage our living conditions in this reality.
As an example, we already have the internet and our voices are already being heard through organizations and places where we can all share perspectives on what would be best way to direct ourselves/ our lives in our current societies; However, money is still a problem and major obstacle to not implement this form of governance, because that would bring down the structures that hold the economy in place. This is why in Equal Money Capitalism and Equal Money System, every project, every idea, every innovation in education, science, technology, infrastructure, resource management, health services, production, etc., will be able to be voted on by everyone that wishes to do so. This will require at the same time sufficient education to each individual to ensure that the proposals are understood in common sense and that what is Best for All is always considered as the intended outcome, for we will all have a present reminder of how bad tings can go when we abdicate our responsibility to decide and delegate it in the hands of a few ones trained to be greedy of power to never see beyond their own interests – which also became our nature as well.
The solution to greed, power and control in a governmental power structure will come by dissolving the government as an all seeing entity driven in its ultimate purpose of maintaining a corporation well fed by an enslaved society locked into a prison that we have all cooperated to build. Yes, it will take time to establish for the first time an absolute state of self-governance, however it is only as individuals, standing in equal self responsibility and self honesty that we can direct and guide our lives in the best way possible. This is what Equality implies. there are no leaders, there are no kings, no royalty, no hegemons, no popes but only individuals that are self regulated according to that which is best for ourselves and everyone in equality
Read more about 319. Political Power in Equal Money Capitalism here
“We understand and realize that we are responsible for what we have created in this life by our acceptance, allowance and consent, both individually and collectively; and in that awareness of true responsibility we undertake to embody our own power and authority to correct that which has been manifest in dereliction of responsibility to uphold and honor all life. As such, we undertake, by this declaration of intention and the acceptance thereof, to commit ourselves to heal this world in every form, in every corner and for every living thing. In this we recognize the inherent power in such responsibility and that all can be made whole once again if built on a foundation of responsibility, oneness and equality for all life. At the same moment, we see that all beings have such power through the capacity of self-forgiveness, for to forgive another still separates that other from their own responsibility to see what they have wrought and to choose through self-forgiveness of free will and volition to correct the former course. Every individual has that power for themselves and that power is embodied in the application of self-forgiveness. We must start by first forgiving ourselves for what we have accepted and allowed as the current conditions on planet Earth. Therefore, by acknowledging our own responsibility, we empower others to follow and to begin to take the steps to make amends and to atone for what has been done before. To atone means to enter a state of being “at one,” by standing one and equal with all life and each other. By so doing, each one is erasing the illusion of external power and control that has manifested in the form of bondage and slavery in this world.” – Ken Cousens
Self Governance is thus that ideal yet very realistic and practical application of living as self realized individuals that understand who we really are as equals as Life. This means nothing else but honoring each other as life, ensuring each other’s well being as our own, living to expand and express ourselves to our utmost potential, ensuring no superior entities or beliefs are created that may disrupt this Equality, ensuring no one is left behind, ensuring everyone is equally granted access to everything that we require to live in the best possible way.
Our Freedom in Equality, our ability to choose the best way to conduct our lives, the best way to educate ourselves, the best ways to feed ourselves, to produce what we will consume in the realization that there’s been utmost care and inherent respect for all life forms and resources that we use to make our lives possible, we will be able to direct our lives in a Self Honest manner, because no one will be ‘setting the tone’ of our lives from the top, because there will be no top – only equals at the same level of The Earth as the Life that we will instead learn how to Live, Enjoy and Express in.
These rewards of Self-Governance will exist according to the Living Principle of Life in Equality embodied by each one of us – there will be no single ting that is produced, labored for, published, adopted as educational system or entertainment that goes without our communal consent and agreement of it being in fact what is best for all. This is where we have to understand that Self Governance is a matter of living by the principle of Participatory Equality wherein that which is best for all is ensured by each one’s self investigation, education and practice of this living principle, so that we can all trust each other to in fact be voting, deciding and opting for the best living condition that is possible for all of us to live by here on Earth, along with all the animals, plants and resources that will be fully recognized as equal and one to the life substance that we all are. Honoring one another as Equals ensures that all our thoughts, words, deeds and intentions are always leading to a best for all outcome.
We will all ensure to forever eradicate the figures that stood as the symbols of power and control: No hegemon, No monarch, No absolutist, no totalitarian dictator, not tyrant, no corporate powers behind politicians, no king, no queen, no pope, no, no cult leaders, no military chief is ever again to take control or ‘steer’ the populations at their personal will – Never again Masters and Never again Slaves – only Equality as Life.
Read the Series about Power and Rights for further understanding and information:
- Education is Available here:
Desteni Lite Process – Free Online Course to Learn how to become part of the Solutions presented here
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Can Life exist in isolation and individualism? We have created our own demise by creating money as the depiction of self interest, greed, power and control over the understanding of the equal relationships that must exist in order for Life to exist. If Money is the Problem, then Money can become the Solution.
“When agreements are not equal and one we experience a world of separation and one part regards itself as more important than another part”
– Bernard Poolman
By existing in a society where individualism is pondered over the collective, we have collectively agreed to cave our own grave, we learned to fear each other the same way we fear our own Death without realizing that existing in Fear means not having ever Lived, we have only survived by competing against each other and eradicating one another as opponents. We have denied our common origin, our interdependence, we have alienated ourselves from ourselves as physical bodies and each other while existing in a mind reality where the illusion of ‘power over the others’ is implanted as the ultimate goals in our lives in the form of desire for happiness, control and success, all possible with money that is currently existent as the definition of our accepted and allowed Inequality and Separation– Not life.
– that which do not support what is best for all life in every way possible
– not realising that what is here is in fact you
– forcing illusion to act as though it is real
– the acknowledgment of limitation in self-interest
– taking care only for yourself and ignoring all others
– not standing equal to/as oneself
– self in disregard of all others as the whole
– creates inequality and undermines the possibility of all reaching the utmost potential as creators
– the compromise of that which is one and equal in favor of self interest
– considering self in disregard of all others as the whole
– only existing in the mind and not as a physical breathing being that considers oneself as part of the whole
“To claim not being aware that one is in separation will always ultimately reveal it self as self deception” – Bernard Poolman
Life has also been anthropomorphized wherein human consciousness has only conceived Life according to beings or organisms that present vital cycles similar to the human ones, everything else is apparently not alive. This is one key point that we get to understand when studying the Desteni Material : everything is equally alive and aware, and we’re all made of the same substance or ‘fabric’ of existence, which is our Equality. It is that which we are all made of. This means that Life is not only limited to the conception of organisms with vital cycles or a certain level of awareness, but everyone and everything from the minute to the greatest is part of the Whole, the totality of this Existence is what we can denominate Life.
However, we require to focus the meaning of Life according to our current system in which we exist until the ‘whole’ meaning can be self-realized as who we are, one by one. This means that we require a practical definition that encompasses the organization and framework of our reality where many beings coexist with one another.
“ Life is relationships and we have made a mess of it”
We as individuals have not even created a proper relationship toward ourselves individually, which means that the relationships toward one another are equally inexistent. We have externalized our own individual alienation in a system where our lives – meaning the relationships and interdependence we hold toward one another – are limited, constricted and abused by rules, laws and regulations that we’ve accepted as the way in which we relate to each other, toward other living beings, the environment, and everything else that is around us that we have simply taken for granted and instead have exploited for the benefit of our own individual perception of what is supposed to be ‘best’ – only caring for our own possessions, our own wealth, our own desires for success and happiness and disregard everyone else.
Life is being denied to each other, because Money is not given to Everyone in Equality. Life is Not Existent, only ‘the Survival of the Fittest’ is what reigns in our society, which means that our money is tainted with blood as the eternal battles between winners and losers to obtain the most money at the expense of each other.
Life is Not Respected, because it isn’t even being conceived as existent within everything and everyone Equally; Life is not understood as the relationships that determine our lives, we have instead pondered selfishness, power, greed and specialness over the understanding of the necessity we have toward one another to be able to exist. This is the foundation of the current crisis in our world: we haven’t understood the importance of living as part of the collective, therefore we have never Lived.
Life in Equality is yet to be born in the physical.
Life: that which forms part of the interdependent support that is here that make relationships/agreements of/as what’s best for all in all ways possible always
– all life is subject to some agreement
– life only exist as agreements –not as individual parts
– the human is an agreement of billions of cells
– life is the common sense of each other in agreement
In Equal Money Capitalism, the Value of Money is Life which means that each being and part of this Earth participates in this collective agreement to create a functional society that exists as the realization/ concretization of Equal Value as Life, and each one of us being equal participants and benefactors of it.
The Agreement is thus Equality: Every individual is equally supported as part of the necessary relationships that exist in interdependence, which means Symbiotic Relationships where Giving and Receiving in Equality is what enables a perfect equilibrium and homeostasis in our social organism.
Through valuing each other as Equals as Life, Money becomes the representation of the Collective Agreement to give to each other what we require to live and function in a mint condition where no competition or fear of survival exist, but instead we honor each other’s existence the same way that we want our own life to be respected, supported, honored and valued in Equality.
Money becomes the representation of Life when it serves to ensure that this Agreement of Equal Interdependence is implied in the form of Money that we can create as a fiat currency that will no longer represent Debt or Scarcity, but a Communal Agreement of giving each other access to that which we require to Live, to have a satisfactorily living condition with our physical requirements met. This is the solution to correct the enslavement and separation on Earth
Life is only possible if all parts are equally regarded, equally valued, equally supported – life is community, life is collectivism, life is the sum of each participant’s responsibility to themselves and each other. This means that Money becomes a recognition of each other’s participation in the system to generate an Equal Well Being, an actual Living Stability of giving and receiving that can only exist if everyone participates in Equality.
Defining Money as Life is not only an economic, political or social agreement, it is the basis and foundation of the realization of who we are as equals and how Life can only exist if we Support Each Other in Equality which means practically providing, producing and generating the necessary living conditions that are Best for All. (Read: 331. What is Best for All in Equal Money Capitalism for details)
Self Realization as in Birthing Life from the Physical is the ultimate reward possible, since it will be the materialization of the understanding about ourselves, who we are as Equals coexisting in Equality and Oneness – giving to each other what we want for ourselves, generating the best living condition we can All Equally benefit from, it is the reason and driving force that each one exists as which motivates our process as Desteni and Equal Money where our ultimate desire for well being is translated in an Equal and one well being for all beings living in our world.
25 Comments | tags: agreements of equality, birthing life from the physical., communism, equal money capitalism., equalizing life, life, life in equality, money as life, redefining words, sociology | posted in Bernard Poolman, Equal Money Capitalism, equal money system, Equal Rights = Equal Responsibilities, Equality, equality consideration, equalmoney system, liberation, Life, Life in Equality, linguistics, Monetary Policy, money, Money Limitation, morality, political economy, Political Reform, Politics, power, power to the people, realization, redefining capitalism, redefining words, relationships, respect, responsibility, rewards, social awareness, social conditioning, social global solutions, social organism, Social Reforms, social structures, socialism, sociology