Category Archives: self creation

515. Remembering The Process

Or understanding the dedication of self-change and actively working on creating and living to our utmost potential

Many times we want to create an experience of self-acceptance, self-trust, self-confidence, having a sense of security, being fearless and being stable enough to overcome the ‘throws of life’ but, those positive thoughts or temporary experiences won’t last, because what’s needed is to walk a comprehensive process to understand how we became all of those limitations and through understanding and seeing each of those ‘wirings’ in our programming, we can then reverse engineer ourselves to create, be and do that which we realize and see is more supportive for ourselves, not as a ‘positive reaction’ to all the ‘negative’ in us, but as a  more in depth step by step process of self-creation in self-awareness, through living our decisions to change, through applying the commitments of what we decide to do next once that we’ve understood that for example, an experience of inferiority exists because of a judgment we have imposed onto others as ‘superior to us’ which makes of that inferiority a self-created experience that one needs to stop feeding and stand up from in equality, not ‘superior or better than’- and this involves a whole change of attitude, ways of thinking, ways of seeing or perceiving reality and others, ways of talking, etc. All of which I would not be able to lay out just in a blog but there’s a whole lot of substantial realizations that one can gain from walking this process I’m talking about in a dedicated and comprehensive manner.

And that’s precisely what the Desteni I Process is about, to learn how to effectively change at a core level of ourselves – no quick fixes for sure – which means, yes it does take dedication, discipline, consistency, self-honesty, self-responsibility but hey, isn’t this the least that we can give and do for ourselves after we have been living and seeing the direct consequence of Not living to our utmost potential? Isn’t it so that if we are to become living beings of integrity, self-respect, honor and responsibility it requires to give it our utmost personal investment in many ways to get to achieve it? Yes it does, we’ve squandered our capacity, ability and potential for such a long time, for generations and generations before.

So, my take here is to take this opportunity that is here and has been here for 10 years now on Earth to for once and for all step out of self-limitation and into self-creation as life – it takes courage, takes dedication, takes self-will but I can guarantee you, it’s the best ‘gift’ you can ever give to yourself in your life, and starting with the basics in the DIP Lite free course is a way to ‘test the waters’ of what this process is and why it is laid out in a day by day process, bit by bit, nothing overwhelming or difficult to do, it’s all about writing self and a willingness to support yourself, that’s all that’s required.

I’m living and seeing the benefits of this in my life and this is what drives me to continually share about it, because I certainly would like every single human being that is able to do this process to realize their potential, to walk out of the ‘tunnel vision’ of the mind and embrace a completely different way of approaching life and living that will stay with you, forever! Of course if lived, applied and walked in this life-time self-commitment approach.

 

Here I share some more depth into what it really means and takes to change.

Through assisting and supporting other people to walk the same process that I’ve been walking for some years now, I am usually reminded of the saying ‘remember the process’ that it takes to get to change one single aspect in ourselves. And in a way yes, having to remind myself of how challenging it can be to walk through a particular experience in our minds that we want to change but simply can’t do so as fast or as quickly as we would like to, because of the layers of reactions, judgments and general negative experiences that we have imprinted onto the living of self-responsibility, which is our ability to create the changes that we want to live while at the same time getting to know and understanding ‘who we are’ as all of those limitations that we have imposed onto ourselves through fears, emotions, feelings, judgments, opinions, prejudices… anything and all that ends up limiting ourselves to really live the way that we see would make more sense and be more beneficial and practical for us.

Through getting to understand my own mind and at the same time working with others and reading others’ processes walking through this same self-investigation, I’ve become aware of a rather common experience that is negative in nature within ourselves, mostly existing as inferiority, shame, embarrassment, insecurity, inadequacy which creates a ‘lock down’ when it comes to conceiving change for the better – and stepping from that into simply creating a ‘positive experience’ in the mind, like trying to just ‘feel’ confident or going into a superiority act towards others is not the way either as real change.  And to get more depth into this please check out this awesome video that explains it all too from the School Of Ultimate Living

·         How to Live Redefined Words

 

What I’ve found is that once that we start seeing and acknowledging for the first time our self-honesty, meaning, seeing the actual truth of ourselves as all the ‘worst’ parts of ourselves that we require to change, an urgency for change emerges in the sense that we start getting bothered by continuing to see ‘the same experience’ in ourselves day by day – but unfortunately this process doesn’t work in such an quick-fix way where we can step from ‘point A’ to point of entire change as ‘point B’, because all of those aspects we want to change of ourselves are not just ‘faulty programming’ that we can  get rid of in one go, we have to understand that  it’s become the way that we live, behave, act  based on our environment, our parents, from past generations, from  our relationships and there’s so much of ourselves that has been imprinted or ‘formed’ according to these thoughts and experiences at a physical level that wanting to step right away into the ‘changed self’ will most likely result in a temporary fix where one might ‘feel better’ but it’s not a real self-creation process over time with actually getting to know oneself and through that understanding laying out the ways to go implementing change bit by bit.

However this ‘change’ doesn’t imply that one has in fact understood how is it that we were maintaining and fueling those ‘negative’ experiences in ourselves as all of the inferiority, inadequacy or experience of being ‘out of place’ all the time and how is it that we have been accepting and allowing them to exist within us/as ourselves through our participation in thoughts, experiences, judgments, opinions that we hold about ourselves, about others and then end up living it out as ‘who we are’ all the time.

This is where the relevance of this process from consciousness to awareness comes in, to really get to know ourselves, to develop the patience, diligence, humbleness, consistency and willingness to dedicate oneself to create one’s life. Through taking the time that real self-change requires, one gets to understand ‘why’ change cannot come that ‘easily’ when getting to understand who we are as our mind, being and body relationship and to what extent all of those personalities, experiences or characters that we’ve become are already ingrained at a deep level within ourselves where sometimes, even after years of applying the tools of self-support, one will still continue ‘peeling the layers’ of our programming and continuing to work with those core or most ingrained patterns and keep ‘at it’ with diligence.

Within this, I listened to this recording today Manifested Consequences & Rushing to Change – The Future of Awareness – Part 86 which very much explains this point in much more detail and more so in the context of ‘fighting’ our mind where we would like to ‘be done with’ our problems and experiences in one go and I definitely suggest listening to it because it details the nature of walking through manifested consequences, which is related to the point of owning our creation and learning to walk through it and embrace our reality in self-responsibility, which is not about fighting, not intended to be considered as a drag or a problem even, but a process of reaping what one sows, facing what one has created, without the emotional process involved in getting to see in self-honesty who we are and have become.

Here what emerged in me as well is how many times we tend to want to jump into this ‘self-perfected’ version of ourselves that is ‘completely changed and done with this process.’ Early on into this process I decided not to participate in these kind of thinking, because I considered it to be ‘unreal’ and at the same time causing more of a limitation and expectations based on how I can conceive myself as ‘perfect’ or ‘be done with process’ currently am in my life, which is certainly not the same person I was 9 years ago when I started this process, nor will it be in 10 or 20 more years down the line.

Therefore, I definitely see the benefit of letting go of this urge to change, or focusing so much in ‘wanting to change’ as a desire where one actually loses ground or sense of what ‘living process’ is all about which is in fact about who we can decide to be and what we decide to do in all of those moments where we can actually apply ourselves to change, to implement and test out the commitments and corrections we’ve written out for ourselves and doing so on a day by day, moment by moment basis.

I’ve found that any time that I even dare to think of ‘all the changes I need to do in my life’ it can seem like this humungous amount of stuff piled up in front of me and of course, I would get completely bummed and discouraged if I’d dared to do this on a daily basis and consider the word ‘change’ as this huge pile of things to roll out in front of me for ‘the rest of my life’! Man, it sounds overwhelming isn’t it? But just like Matti explained in his very cool vlog as well You only ever have to change for ONE DAY we don’t really ‘own’ that future that we are projecting as this ‘changed self’, we don’t even ‘own’ or have certainty of breathing our next breath, which is why this process is very much something that I suggest is considered on a ‘moment to moment’ basis and considering ‘one point at a time’ as well.

Otherwise if we go into imaginations, ideas, projections of ‘being changed’ or ‘being done’ with one’s process, it leads one to then inevitably ‘come back’ to reality and see where one is and get discouraged, get ‘bummed out’ or overwhelmed for the apparent ‘amount of work to do’ and that’s why the suggestion that you’ll read around many times: one point at a time, one breath at a time, take it day by day, moment by moment.

I can say from personal experience that if you drop all of that future projection or ideals of ‘who you want to be’ or drop the need to ‘reach’ certain imagined outcome for yourself and instead completely work with ‘what’s here’ in your life, in your reality in the moment = everything simplifies a LOT and suddenly this whole ‘self-change’ process becomes very realistic and very doable, even simplistic if one cooperates in self-honesty.

This also implies that we need to let go of this idea that one will be ‘done’ with one’s process at some point. I definitely also don’t see this process of changing who we are not only as individuals but at a global level as something that I’ll get to ‘finish’ this lifetime nor in the next generations to come – yet, it doesn’t matter to me because this process as much as it is yes a process of self-change and global change, I mostly see it as a way of living, a new way of creating our lives and learning new ways to make our lives supportive for ourselves and others, within the manifested consequences and yes limitations and current contexts we are living in this world, which is why we also at the same time go understanding what being a self-responsible creator means.

How I have approached this process of self-change is not so much as a ‘temporary’ thing that I am applying or walking as a course only, but genuinely integrating new ways of thinking, living, interacting, creating, relating to others, making decisions, improving myself, bettering myself in many ways and that is in essence what living is about for me – not about wanting to be ‘perfect’ or ‘fearing making mistakes’ or ‘reacting to my flaws’ any longer, but rather embracing all of which I go uncovering about myself – yes, the ugly, the worst, the not cool at all aspects too – that exists as who I currently am so that I can then get ‘hands on the matter’ and work on it.

This is how this process from consciousness to self-awareness as life is something continuous, bit by bit, just like we go ‘powering’ our lives breath by breath, beat by beat – it’s a way of existing in myself and in my every day  life where through integrating these tools of self-investigation such as self-honesty, self-writing, self-forgiveness, living words and laying out practical solutions for change becomes a new way in which I think, in which I can use ‘what’s here’ in my moment to learn about myself, to devise solutions, to test them out, to fine tune my expression, to stand up from mistakes, to create new paths for me to walk on, to expand the way in which I conceive me as part of this world, to learn to see others as equal in living substance.

And this is how through the application of all of this with dedication and consistency, one can in fact develop much of the supportive and realistic aspects or values that we tend to project about ourselves as ‘having changed’ and having all these virtues and supportive habits – but then it is the result of this day by day application, it is a direct consequence of one’s decision to support oneself in every moment and live the words and commitments that one has laid out to change.

In this change ceases to be this ‘chimera’ to someday, somehow ‘suddenly reach’ this self that we want to be, instead it is a very real and practical process where we go creating the person that we want to be and live as for the rest of our lives for and by ourselves, in every moment. This is about the person you’ll be with for the rest of your life!

Long blog! but that’s what I essentially wanted to share today, how a lot of the ‘cool words’ or ‘ideals’ we want to live such as confidence, assertiveness, self-trust, discipline, responsibility, comfort, enjoyment, the ability to establish supportive relationships with others, etc. are the result of processes over space and time that one can go working on a daily basis with, and that’s how what matters is not the ‘end result’ or a ‘perfected-self’ at the end of your life, but what matters is who one is on a day to day, moment by moment basis, that’s the only life we ever ‘own’ really, and that’s why projecting change into the future is pointless, really, and a waste of breaths and potential to who we can be in the moment, today.

Join in!

  

 

Join us in our process of Self-Creation as LIFE


512. Process Works!

Or realizing the ways in which we can genuinely change and face challenging times in our lives with grace and self respect

Lately I have been surprising myself in the possible ways to face what would usually be a rather uncomfortable, depressing, difficult and generally ‘shitty’ time upon facing certain consequences in my life. And here I can say with open words: Process Works! because this time around and from the start to the end of this whole point of creation, I could live and experience myself way differently than before, I was certainly not reliving the ‘who I was’ in the past even if the situation itself could be quite similar to some others in the past.

This time I made a clear decision to change myself, to challenge my ways, to adapt, to be flexible, to learn from myself and others involved, to be considerate, to in many ways work through the forms of ‘control’ that I have come so used to exerting towards others, I’ve learned to not see others as the source of my problems but fully own my creation.

Yet it didn’t all just stop there in learning to not over react or not get emotionally overwhelmed about it – while yes, admitting at the same time that there are things that need to be let out through experiencing some emotions and letting out tears through it all, but I’ve found that I do not remain ‘sinking’ into it for long, I stand up back up and continue doing my things, which is another cool thing about responsibilities, seeing them as a point of stability that one has to get to and attend regardless of what’s going on in my reality.

What I also did this time is to learn to walk a consequence in a rather ‘graceful’ manner, meaning, not judging myself for it, not locking myself into a bundle of fears and resistances or judgments about the situation I was facing. I made it a point to not see it as ‘the end of the world’ but instead understand its process of creation as something that I am responsible for and therefore now having to walk it through its completion.

Also while managing all the practical points required to walk this consequence, I also noticed that I could get myself to a point of stability with relative ease, surely after walking through some fears, woes and nervousness around it – yet I could remain stable, grounded, clear in my decisions and my relationship with everyone involved, to the point where I saw how even if something turns out ‘badly’ one doesn’t have to go through an emotional experience that equates such outcome, because it serves no purpose.

This relates also to what I shared about yesterday in relation to that dream that I had where even if I was already ‘tackled’ by the ox-goat, the worst thing to do is to get over emotional about it and fearful and locked out of oneself in a panic attack. I decided to take it with ease, in calm and stability, in a stance not of blame, spite or anger – even though it did come up partially I did manage to walk through it before it became prominent – or completely changing the way I behave towards others from a ‘positive’ to the ‘negative’ either.

I didn’t do all of that because I understood that I would have taken myself to an experience that one has to continually be in one’s mind to justify and build reactions according to thoughts, memories, emotions that are being held through blame,  spite and through irresponsibility all the way and I decided that I wasn’t going to be that again this time around.

Instead, without being aware, I did walk through it all in a rather amicable, graceful, stable and considerate manner, without going into a ‘positivity’ either or suppressing what I was going through – because stuff did come up, but my constant pillar of self support was also there: Writing, self-forgiveness, reminding myself where I stand, what I am here for, what my purpose in this life is and also being grateful for this opportunity to see for once and for all where I was requiring radical actions to correct something in my life and then doing so not within a starting point of supporting myself, instead of seeing it as a problem only or a point of loss.

In essence changing the way I decided to walk through consequence has allowed me to see a part of myself, a way to be, live and act in moments where before I would have only imagined chaos, drama, pain and sorrow as an outcome. And the reason is… because of this process!

There’s nothing better you can invest yourself on than learning to see through the veils of consciousness, of emotions, of ‘problems’ and directly learn to tap into your potential even in difficult times, which doesn’t make things ‘easy’ per-se, but we can change who we are when facing our consequences and learn a lot about ourselves in the process, which means learning to see the troubles and outcomes in life as opportunities to grow, to expand, to learn about ourselves as I am now seeing in my case, which is quite satisfying for me to say the least.

A last pointer here: not to judge yourself for whatever you have created, faced or made a mistake about, being in guilt trips and remorse leads nowhere but a cul-de-sac of emotions without a way out – best to learn from it, learn about oneself as that point of creation and stand for it the best way one is able to, which is considering and doing what is best for all and leaving aside personal interests.

I definitely want everyone in this world to realize this potential we all have, and how to work through it so, start today if you’re ready to do your own, because we won’t get to change this world unless we’re all on the same page of realizing our potential for self-change and actually live it.

Thanks for reading

Suggested audios:

Disconnected Starting Points – Demons in the Afterlife – Part 74

Stop Over Complicating your Solution – Principled Living

 

 

 


508. Let’s Stop Repeating Ourselves

Or how to stop repeating the worst of ourselves in the past in our current moment with self-awareness and self-honesty

 

One of the great things about learning to observe oneself in one’s mind and learning to be aware of the patterns, habits, tendencies, ways of ‘being’ that we develop throughout our lives is that in doing this along with the principle or starting point of bettering ourselves, of being able to change ‘our ways’ over time, we can stop recreating our problems, difficulties and generally non-supportive experiences of our past in our present and so our future.

For example, in my case what came up in me the moment I realized that I was again going to be facing what I had defined as ‘a difficult/tough time’ in my life based on how I have lived through the same or similar situation before, I allowed myself to initially go through this expectation and laying out before me in my mind, in the way of imagination, projecting all the same emotional experiences, all the sadness and sorrow and essentially my worst case scenario situation, repeating the exact same ‘bad time’ I had before with a consequence like this, but this time I did stop myself in that moment and said to myself “Wait a minute, It Doesn’t Have to Be This Way Again!”

And as simple as this intervention may have been in the moment, it opened my eyes to realize that this time I didn’t have to prepare myself to essentially repeat all the ‘bad times’ I have created for me before in similar situations. I realized my ability to change how I face this consequence this time around, I realized that the whole point of going through various situations in our lives is precisely to be able to learn from them and so be better prepared to face stuff in our lives the following times.

What I’ve done this time is process it better in the context of owning my creation, taking responsibility for what I can do, be and change for myself, which is part of what I’ve been sharing lately in these blogs. This is very relevant to consider because many times we actually end up justifying any emotional reactions based on the position we take in such situations that we usually impose or assign to ourselves based on memories, and in memories which is ‘who we are in our minds’ we definitely are not our ‘supportive self’ unless one actually creates memories of self-support, which would be a different story.

This is about becoming aware of how in the moment of facing tough times, consequences, a point of creation that went in an unexpected way, it’s important to keep our awareness clear not going into ‘bringing up memories’ or adopting ‘past ways’, making sure one is not adopting a position that we have played out in the past that led to an emotional reaction, led down the path of depression or generally being destructive – this is what’s dictated mostly by ourselves in our minds where upon facing such tough moments, we immediately tend to associate our Current Situation with a Similar Past Situation and then adopt the same reactions or stance as in the past – and in doing so, we actually condemn ourselves to repeat the same mistakes, the same outflows, the same emotional reactions with no change, like broken records.

That’s why it’s very important to not condition our Current Reality to the memories of how we ‘lived out’ a situation in the past but instead use this current reality as an opportunity to do things differently, an opportunity to break through the pattern of who one once was, to make a directive decision to not wallow in helplessness, hopelessness, depression or just ‘giving up’ but to stand in a supportive stance, one of introspection, self-reflection based on self-responsibility and self-honesty – which means, focused on oneself, not on ‘others’ and ‘what they did or didn’t do’ – but realizing that this is our chance, our moment and our opportunity to stand up for once and for all.

This is a simple reflection to share today, to not repeat ourselves in the present moment based on our – excuse the word –fucked up past experiences – but learn from them, grow from it, show to ourselves that we’ve in fact learned from our past and gotten better at facing consequences in our lives. This is satisfying to do, that despite the nature and process to walk through in a consequence, it still can be a fulfilling process for oneself, because we give ourselves the proof that we can in fact change and do things differently and so whatever comes, we can be clearer, wiser and stronger to face it.

Surely, I also have to be careful of not creating a ‘super human’ approach to it, because that would be like going into a ‘high’ and so it will invariably cause its polar opposite of a low – not about positive thinking as a solution either. It’s about a genuine sense of stability, of empowerment for a lack of better word where one can see that as much as it will be tough, challenging to face a point of abrupt change or consequences that one wasn’t expecting to go through, one can still go through it and learn from it, and expand and grow by taking responsibility for it, by developing self-honesty in it, and that’s very cool to say the least, it’s self-supportive.

As I shared before, sometimes we don’t realize how much we have been living in a very static status quo until we see the floor beneath us be shaken, it pushes us to reassess who we are, what we are creating, reassess our decisions and direction in life, so we can always make of these ‘raucous’ times the best for ourselves, to reaffirm what we want to create, how we want to stand through the face of consequences and let that define us, not our falls, not our mistakes, not our ‘wrong turns’ – and I’ve found that very, very supportive for myself, therefore sharing it here as well for anyone that may be finding themselves in a similar situation to this.

We always have the ability to stop the past within ourselves every moment in our present, by stopping the patterns that we know have never been supportive for ourselves in our lives, to finally step out of the fears, the un-supportive ideas that we’ve thought ourselves to ‘be like’ that one knows in self-honesty are not the best parts of ourselves, therefore why do we have to keep feeding it, accepting it and allowing it as ‘who we are’?

We have the ability to stand up and make a change, in the moment, in breathing and letting go of the past in one moment, in self-forgiving the emotions and experiences that emerge and instead decide to live a word, a supportive word that we can see assists us in establishing our ground, build our ground underneath our feet and get back on track.

 

Thanks for reading

 

And join in! Learn how to do this for yourself, it’s free:

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Artwork by: Damian Ledesma

 


Join us in our process of Individuals standing as Equals as LIFE


507. From V-Day to U-Day

 

I read the following quote by Sunette Spies today and I see it as a very important message for all of us to consider in days like today where Valentine’s day has been for many – including myself in the past – a cause of anger, sadness or despair for not being in a relationship, which is definitely not necessary since we all have the ability to redefine how these global-celebrations are lived by each one of us so, here’s her quote:

Yes, today is Valentine’s Day – the 14th of February – globally. I reflected on this day, even with being in a relationship. Looking at the symbolism of the letter V, inspiring me to do this post and also a video soon to come!!! The following opened up for me:

Transforming V to U – V-Day to U-Day. What does this mean?
Even if you are in a relationship – you are still an individual….This is something many forget, neglect, don’t consider or simply haven’t looked at. Being an individual means YOU as who you are as an individual person choose, and every day essentially chooses to share yourself, grow, commit, learn, enjoy, built, create etc. a relationship and / or life with another. In this process, it becomes 1 + 1 = 2: one individual + one individual = a relationship. A trinity is formed. Two INDIVIDUALS creating a relationship.

eVery day should be V-Day and / or U-Day!!! We redefine then the ONE Valentine’s Day we GLOBALLY SHARE as a GLOBAL CELEBRATION of oneself as individual and / or one’s relationship with one’s partner as I do know there is also family days, friends days etc. that are globally celebrated.
YOU CAN OWN VALENTINES DAY!!! In a way of defining and celebrating it for yourself as you see fit – rather than in any way being emotional, judgmental, allowing yourself to go into comparison of others etc.

My message to all this day is: OWN THIS DAY!!! Define and celebrate it in a way that SUPPORTS and EMPOWERS you as a person and how you live. In the end, what will matter the most is your integrity, love, care, consideration and regard as a person towards yourself and others…

MUCH more to come in videos soon to be posted! Enjoy yourself this day as much as any other day…you are ALWAYS WITH YOU!!!” – Sunette Spies

 

Based on this, I’d like to share on the importance of this self-relationship because many times we come to accept and allow the belief that our happiness depends on being with another in a relationship, and sometimes we might even get to live out that type of experiences only to in the end see that without the person, we are still with ourselves and no matter if we are in a relationship or not, what remains is self, here, that we continue to live as and with.

I know, it sounds almost ‘weird’ to say that the first relationship we should establish in self-agreement is with ourselves and that means precisely walking this process from consciousness to self-awareness, self honesty and self-support, having ourselves as our starting point, reason or motivation for it.

Through walking this process for myself, and over time and through the various relationships I’ve had with partners, friends, colleagues, one thing is certain: change and I have been there before in my life where ‘the end of a relationship’ would mean ‘the end of my world’ for some time and it was usually very hard to step back on my own two feet, precisely because I was not focusing on first creating a relationship with myself, in essence living for myself, appreciating me, enjoying me, supporting me first and foremost.

I had mostly lived out a pattern of ‘being there for another’ and through that ‘completing myself’ which is definitely not sustainable, it was not healthy for myself or for another because that’s how dependency is created in relationships. I learned this the hard way, but through walking the Agreements: Redefining Relationships Course while I was alone or without a partner in my life, it assisted me to ground myself in understanding how no matter if I was alone or in a relationship, the focus of support was still on myself. It assisted me to precisely understand what this Self-Relationship is and throughout the whole course I got to see how a relationship is in fact a sum of 2 people, not ‘me completing another’ or me being ‘fulfilled’ by another, I got to see how no relationship that is supportive can last when one is not existing in that self-agreement to support ourselves first.

And this is how the word agreement is used as a way to define relationships where one person in self-agreement, in their own self-relationship can walk with another in the same self-agreement and self-relationship to then stand together and create this agreement of two individuals, a redefined-relationship in fact.

In doing this, one is also better equipped for whichever outcome is in a relationship, no matter the hardships, obstacles, starting overs or break ups. For example, if the relationship ends, sure there is the whole process of having to part ways and get used to being alone again – however this is a much ‘smoother’ process as well when one has a cemented relationship with oneself in self-support and self-honesty, wherein in that self-support and self-agreement one has lived within a relationship, no matter if the other person is no longer there, what one does for oneself as self-support doesn’t change, what one has grown and learned from the relationship remains there as oneself, how one has assisted and supported oneself in practical terms in one’s life and at an emotional level doesn’t change if the other person is no longer there.

Of course there are changes in terms of activities done by both in a relationship and any other practical arrangements in day to day living, but those changes are also able to be faced with more stability, strength and determination when one has already realized that, as Sunette explains, no matter if one is in a relationship or not, we are always with ourselves and that is something that is very cool to understand in the depth that it implies, because then we don’t depend on something or someone else for us to develop ourselves, to grow as people, to change the ways that we know we have to adjust in ourselves, to develop a genuine care for our bodies, our mind and so our lives and plans in it. It is always up to us, regardless of being in a relationship or not.

It’s interesting how we’ve come to accept a notion of ‘void’ or ‘lack’ if one is not in a relationship and allowing it to be a part of self-definition that is usually seen as a ‘lesser value’ or ‘in the waiting for it’ – when the fact is that in doing so, we are suppressing or not looking at the relationship that is by far the most important one in our lives: with ourselves, because no matter ‘where’ we are or with ‘who’ we are, we are always with ourselves and it is ourselves that we will genuinely ‘be with’ for the rest of our lives, which is great as well to realize ‘no matter what’ I always got me, my support, my words to live and my life to continue expanding on.

So, I can wholeheartedly recommend assisting oneself through the Agreements Course, specially if you can identify with what I mentioned earlier as the ‘who I was’ previously in relationships where I would literally lose my ground whenever I had to end a relationship and I’ve found out that this doesn’t have to be that way, one can decide to not give into those patterns and instead strengthen and rekindle – if you will – the relationship to oneself, because it is quite liberating at the same time for oneself and for others to not make ourselves dependent on others to live in self-fulfillment, in self-enjoyment and self-support, wherein we can decide to look at life through the eyes of owning our creation, owning our time of the day every day.

Therefore it is up to us then to instead of going into reactions like sadness or fatalism for being or not being in a relationship ‘with another’, I’d rather say: focus on the relationship with yourself because it’s with you that You’ll live with for the rest of your life, it’s your body, your mind the one that you’ll have to ‘stand through’ and with until your last breath and if we haven’t given to ourselves that actual love, care, consideration, support and enjoyment of who we are as a person, as an individual, alone,  then how can we expect any other person to ‘give it to us’? That’s how love turns to hate which Is what I have explained in a previous blog if you want to check it out.

I suggest embracing yourself and realizing how we are not really ‘alone’ as we are always with ourselves – and at the same time it is also up to us to expand our definition of relationships to others in a supportive manner, expanding this self-agreement in our relationship with any other person is certainly a suggestion here as well, so that no matter ‘what’ goes on in our lives and paths, we always have our ourselves as our own ground, our starting point of self-support, our own self-care and self-love, and in turn be able to give it to others as a genuine expression of ourselves, not as a ‘need’ or ‘lack’ or ‘convenience’ of sorts.

That’s definitely the kind of human beings I’d like us all to be, to be able to stand alone and be self-caring, self-fulfilled individuals that can join paths to create something of support together for ourselves and for others  – yet can function as units or ‘stand alones’ in an equally supportive manner. That’s the real equality equation of 1+1=2 and that’s what I want to continue practicing being and standing as in my life and with others in my life.

Thanks for reading,

Enjoy

 

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Join us in our process of Individuals standing as Equals as LIFE


506. From Despair to a Constructive Aftermath

 

 The aftermath here is the time after one has faced a particular outcome that wasn’t expected or preferred in relation to something that we were investing ourselves to create. That can be a particular project that doesn’t gain as much traction as expected, a job that we get fired from, a relationship that didn’t work out, a health problem that limits our abilities in certain ways, the death of a loved one… all of those situations that are part of our lives are the ones that we usually tend to get more ‘stung’ by in the sense of feeling discouraged and beaten down from what is seen or perceived as a failure, as a loss, as a ‘having to start over’ moment, as something that we invested on so much of ourselves but simply didn’t add up to the expected result.

It is quite common to feel defeated, to go into thoughts of considering that we’ve wasted our money, time and effort, that it all was ‘for nothing’ and then starting to close down to the consideration of trying it out again, of starting over a business, starting a new project or finding new ways to support ourselves physically on the face of illness or disease. We usually tend to see these unfavorable outcomes as a really bad thing to happen to us, but one thing that I’ve found most supportive is to recognize and – as I’ve been sharing lately – ‘own our creation’ all the way from beginning to end.

This has assisted me to be able to stand up and through the whole unraveling of a particularly ‘unfavorable outcome’ and learning to see it with the eyes of ‘I created this, I can learn from what didn’t work out, I can stand up again and create myself again, not give up on myself’

The experience of ‘giving up’ seems to be a ‘default tantrumy setting’ for ourselves in these situations, wherein let’s say we don’t get a desired outcome from a business venture and one can go into the extremes of saying ‘Ah, I’ll never again open my own business again, I’m done!’ or if one fails with a particular project, one tends to go into ideas of ‘I should not have even done that, what a waste of time, I’m never going to do such a thing again, such a failure!’ and in terms of relationships failing or having to part ways, one can go into thoughts like ‘I knew I should have never stepped into that relationship, I knew it was going to be a problem, I’m never going to go into a relationship again’ and we tend to be pessimistic within it all which I have also had a tendency before to do, which is why here today I share how this is not how it has to be.

The aftermath of these situations is actually a key moment for self-reflection, to first of lay out for ourselves our creation, see in self-honesty who we have been throughout the whole creation of the relationship, project, venture etc. then write out and self-forgive the judgments, the blame, the sense of ‘giving up’ on oneself in that particular aspect of our lives – or sometimes even wanting to give up on life entirely – because in those usually tough moments we tend to see everything through a thick fog of ‘lostness’ and ‘confusion’ and ‘despair’ and that’s precisely, right there, where that potential of ourselves as that willingness to stand up and take responsibility has to emerge. It won’t be an ‘automatic’ thing to happen either, it takes an actual decision to not go into emotional victimization to whatever went wrong or bad in our lives and first own our creation: I did this, I created this, I participated in it from beginning to end, therefore I assume the consequences/outcome of it.

Now here one thing that has assisted me a lot is to focus on what I’ve learned from the ‘failure’/mistake/problem/outcome’ and focus on what my participation throughout It all was. Sometimes things are entirely moved and created by ourselves, but some other times we have to work in teams to create something. If that’s so, blaming another for something not working out will only lead us down the path of seeing others as the problem, instead of focusing on ourselves. This is where the equilibrium comes wherein upon me recognizing, admitting and owning my creation, my part in the situation, I can at the same time then assist others to look at it as well within that same starting point, without any hidden agendas like an attempt to blame or accuse, because in that moment I understand the importance of sticking to seeing ‘my responsibility’ and my participation – or the lack thereof – in something that I had invested myself to create or get to work in along with others whose participation also counts in it, and so seeing the conjoined creation as a sum of individuals’ responsibility.

This makes the whole aftermath process easier because I can then review all of my decisions in the creation that I ended up ‘failing’ at and stand with each one of them, understanding how in the moment that I made them I trusted myself, I gave it my all, I can be clear that I did push to change things within me to make it all more effective, I know where I wasn’t giving it my 100%, I can clearly see where and how I compromised myself, what I could have changed but didn’t get to it and the ways in which I also did assist others to do the same as part of the team or project. 

This is how even when the outcome is unfavorable or unexpected, one can stand in one’s two feet and stand with one’s creation: with what one did – or didn’t do – what one pushed to change and do – or didn’t change or do – what one invested on time, effort, money on – or where it all lacked – and so make of this whole ‘failure’ situation a time for a personal review where we can see where our weaknesses existed and take note of them so that one can work through it. And at the same time also acknowledging where we got to strengthen ourselves, to expand, to learn new things about ourselves and others, which regardless of the outcome of things, will always be there in any creation process, alone or with others.

Therefore, a strong suggestion is to not allow oneself to go down misery lane upon facing a particular outcome, a problem, point of failure, bankruptcy, relationship breakup, health problem, loss of a loved one or anything that we might perceive in our lives as a ‘failure’, a loss or an obstacle – these are moments where we can open up in self-reflection, looking back at who we have been and learn from it, also to be able to stand with our creation, owning our deeds and their outcomes.

Here then why I’ve been placing ‘failure’ with these quotes is because this is a loaded word where we usually can experience it as a complete ‘drain’ of all of our life force and feel like we won’t ever get back up again from it – but if we learn to see a failure as one shot, one opportunity, one way, one path that we walked through with all of our being and intent to make it work, and regardless of it all we still discover that we’re not leading ourselves to the outcome we wanted to create for ourselves, then that’s where it’s best to stop going any further, go back to the drawing board and create another way.

Sometimes I’ve seen how specially in relationships, we tend to want to keep walking the same path out of fear losing the person in the relationship or fearing the outcomes from separating from another, but we only know that if over time we have tested something out sufficiently and still we’re seeing the same problems emerge, it’s best to not prolong the ‘testing time’ and rather start focusing on changing paths and learning from what didn’t work out on both parties. This I’ve found is more honorable as well, where we don’t keep walking a lie, where we have the courage to stop a point of deception for oneself and for another and everyone else involved in it, because that’s how we also prevent further consequences and at the same time shorten the time to face our creation, instead of doing so further down the road where more people, more time, more resources have been invested into something.

Here I also have learned from Bernard Poolman, a mentor and friend to myself, how no matter how many times his business failed and had to go through the whole point of ‘losing it all’, he kept at it, eventually succeeding in what he wanted to create. This perseverance, this continuity and dedication to creating something – along with the responsibility it entails – is definitely something I can learn from and integrate into my life so that I know, no matter how ‘bad’ things get in our lives, in our projects or relationships, no matter how ‘bleak’ the outcome may seem, one can still decide to stand up from the failure, the loss, the ‘breakup’ and learn from it, get back on one’s own two feet to then start planning the next step in our creation, mostly being wiser, if we learn well from our mistakes, mostly stronger – if we realize that what we feared facing and eventually ended up having to face didn’t ‘kill us’ but in fact wasn’t as bad as we thought it was going to be.

This is the kind of self-trust that we always have and can stand as in our lives in difficult moments or situations where we feel it as “the end of our world”, but it’s not so if we decide to not give into all the depression and emotional aftermath and instead create a constructive aftermath, a time for personal reflection, self-forgiveness, self-introspection to see what we did or didn’t do and so, start paving the way to get back on our own two feet and continue walking the same path or a new path, it’s up to us, we decide, we are our creators.

Thanks for reading

 

Suggested support from Eqafe.com

 

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504. Stepping Out of Comfort Zones

Or looking at the limiting nature of ‘comfort zones’ and why it is necessary to step out of them in order to live to our utmost potential.

Getting out of a comfort zone might seem scary, sometimes undesirable, sometimes plain ‘torturing’ but it is only so based on how we have defined our relationship to that which we have defined as ‘our comfort zone’. Meaning, we all know what is genuinely not supportive for ourselves yet we easily get accustomed to tolerate it, to ‘live with it’ and stopping genuinely questioning what is it that I am in fact accepting and allowing of myself – and others – if continuing existing this same way day in and day out?

However the point in defining this bundle of limitations, stagnations, fears and limitations as ‘comfort zones’ or ‘safe zones’ is definitely unacceptable, which leads us to rather look at who we are in our minds and how in defining limitations, fears, judgments, beliefs that limit our potential as a ‘safe zone’ is indicating the ‘default’ nature of ourselves in our minds, which is definitely not that of support, not that of assisting ourselves to grow and expand, not that of getting out of our predefined and ‘default settings’ so to speak that we are born with as a mind and being in a physical body that carries all the info from our parents plus our environmental influence.

So here I’m deciding to from now on remind myself to investigate and challenge that which I am perceiving as comfort-zone in my life, what seems ‘easy’ for me to do already because even if it is a constant point of support, if it becomes a ‘halt’ in my personal development because I don’t push any further to other aspects or directions, then that’s the moment where I start embracing limitation and stagnation as ‘who I am’ and believe it’s just how things are or how our lives are ‘meant to be’ which are usually accepted as ‘perfectly normal’ reasons as to why we are supposed to remain in one single spot that is comfortable to us in our lives.

It takes courage, sometimes evident ‘shit hitting the fan’ type of consequences to step out of a comfort zone in our lives and I can see it for myself how it may seem like a scary thing to do at first, but eventually one goes realizing that self-honesty cannot exist in a comfort-zone mindset, because self-honesty is about questioning anything that we have defined as a ‘good experience’ in our lives and ultimately with time, one begins to only ‘question’ it but if we don’t make directive decisions to actually challenge the status-quo and step out of our comfort zone out of fear losing the seemingly ‘safe’ or ‘good enough’, we’ll remain looping around the awareness at the same time of there being ‘something more’ to ourselves, a better version of ourselves, a better potential.

Yet, if we at the same time keep a hold of ourselves in a comfort zone in whichever way we have defined it in our lives to be, we are closing the doors to give those first steps into creating a potential, because comfort zone is mostly about remaining in ‘one spot’ and one ‘same zone’ that we believe is good enough or comfortable enough to even try and alter it, change it – because if we investigate further, we fear ‘losing’ something or fear ‘changing’ something but we forget that if our starting point is that of self-honest process of change, then how can we go into fearing that it will be ‘for the worse’ if we apply common sense and self-honesty? And that’s how we can debunk our illusions and limitations.

If there’s a thing that by default – by preprogramming – we fear in our lives is change, fearing the unknown, fearing that which we haven’t even created yet and is existing as this ‘formless future’ that we get scared to face… but, here I question this again, why would we be scared of the unknown when one can instead start becoming more directive in creating our reality – on a day to day basis – once that we let go of the fear to step out of the comfort zone. Meaning we won’t be directed by an experience as a fear or prejudice about ourselves or others, but we will be then making sound decisions that we can test out and live out as points of support for ourselves and see what opens up in doing that.

We don’t usually like or prefer to question our comfort zones, because questioning it and starting to see the reality of ‘who we are’ in them will invariably shake our status-quo, will invariably prompt us to look within ourselves, in self-honesty, and decide if this comfort zone is in fact a place of growth, expansion, letting go of fears and limitations – or if it has become a normalcy point of ‘stability’ but not genuinely taking the steps to get to create and so be our utmost potential.

Once that I establish this for myself in what I just wrote, and deciding to root myself in self-honesty, I see that I cannot fool myself any longer and that I can in fact know which aspects of myself have been stagnant, which aspects I could expand even more and I may not know the ‘ways’ to do this yet, because that is precisely yet to be created, but I can see a direction, a purpose that I will go fine tuning as I go living this decision to step out of the comfort zone, which is actually a cool thing in spite of what may come up in my mind as fears or reasons ‘not to do this’, but how else will we get past our fears, preferences, our judgments, beliefs and limitations other than facing them in our lives and work through transcending them? In this case I also rather have to be thankful for consequences, because how else would I notice these points to change within me and in my life?

Now that doesn’t mean ‘we always have to put ourselves through that which we resist doing in order to face something’ – no, otherwise someone might come up with the idea upon reading this of ‘fearing heights’ and so going to the top of the steepest mountain and test their fear there without considering the actual danger there could be to it if improperly prepared – this is not about that.

This is about those things in our daily lives that we know firsthand we are still living as a ‘repetitive machine’ that lives in memories/limitations of the past, always reacting with the same fears, the same judgments and that’s precisely where stepping out of a comfort zone is letting go of that memory and experience of ourselves as ‘all that we’ve known ourselves to be’ in that moment, and instead, step out of the box and into self-creation, living out the words that we see would be most supportive in that moment – which will be easy to spot at times because it’s usually things we have in fact been wanting to do for a long time or that we’ve learned/seen others do, but feared doing it by ourselves – and then live out that decision to cross the threshold, step into the ‘unknown’ and realize that… we are still here, we remain! After all of that fear, anticipation or resistance to change, one can actually make it through and look back to see the comfort zone as the actual self limitation-zone, the fear-zone, the judgment-zone, the least-potential zone it has always been.

If this is not sounding liberating to you, not sure what will! But to me this is a refreshing way of looking at things, especially when we perceive we are losing something as our comfort zone – and this point was said to me recently as well to not only look at what is ‘lost’ but rather as what is gained as well, since we cannot really ‘lose’ something supportive of ourselves while being in a comfort zone – understanding ‘comfort zone’ now as all the definitions and aspects of it I shared above – we can only lose the fears, the limitations, the beliefs, the dependencies, the judgments, the habits that are not supportive for our lives and instead decide to give to ourselves an opportunity, a new path, a chance to recreate ourselves in a way that we would be willing to live with in self-honesty and that means, ensuring we are not settling for anything less than what we are able to do and live by, because that is represented by default by the movement to ‘stepping out of the comfort zone’ – not just changing to choose a ‘least worst’ either.

Last point here, if we don’t do this for ourselves, who else will? Sometimes life pushes us to redefine ourselves, to change and step out of a comfort zone through consequence and that’s mostly not a nice or pretty situation, but mostly a necessary one if we are on this path to live to our utmost potential.

Sometimes we have to stand as or create that point of ‘out of the comfort zone’ for another to step out of their own limitations and break illusions that were preventing us from facing our ourselves or getting to create ourselves to that best version of that is there as a potential in all of us. This might seem scary to do at first when facing such situations, but if we push through in self-honesty and make a decision to not deceive ourselves any further – as in creating comfort in limitation – then we can find the necessary clarity and realize that as difficult or hurtful as it might temporarily be, ‘growing pains’ is a certainty in this process, yet it is a momentary phase too, it too shall pass and it’s entirely up to us then to decide who we are and what we decide to create once that we decide and live our moving out of our comfort zones.

Words to live in this process: courage, determination and consistency in stepping out of the comfort zones.

Thanks for reading.

 

Very Supportive material at Eqafe.com to review on this topic:

Comfort Zones and Dependency

Challenge Yourself

Fear of Change – Fears & Phobias

Waiting for Change – Reptilians – Part 316

 

 Walking the thoughts as me


503. Redefining Logic to Develop Common Sense

 

Or learning to question ‘who we are’ in the factors used to create a ‘logical outcome’ and in doing so, change how we live within our minds.      

Several years ago I came to understand that logic and common sense is not the same thing. That meant that the way in which I had learned to understand the outcomes of things based on these premises or factors that would be added up in relation to one another to create a seemingly ‘reasonable result,’ is not in fact a clear way to distinguish what is best for all, what is common sense and what makes sense altogether in relation to living principles.

Recently I’ve been looking at this point based on assisting someone that is now facing consequential outflows in their life based on giving too much into this one seemingly ‘normal’ mechanism of our minds based on logic and how through following this logic, he has made himself believe that all those premises or factors as ‘reasons and justifications’ made sense in his mind, that they completely added up to what he then defined as a right to demand justice or expose unfairness about something he has in fact created and participated on throughout his entire life.

The point being here that logic is sold as this mathematical verbal certainty that leads to the correctness in thought and being able to identify ‘false reasoning’ but, something that we are never taught about Logic in school – if you were even in a school that teaches logic of course – is that the premises should be questioned based on the subjectivity that they can – most likely – contain as emotions, feelings, perceptions, assumptions, judgments, preferences, desires, fears, ideas, beliefs, speculations and a plethora of other forms of ‘thinking’ that, when seen through the eyes of self-awareness, self-honesty and self-responsibility they all should be questioned as ‘unreal facts’ and understood as aspects or mechanisms of ‘who we are’ in our minds that should be at all times questioned as faulty-thinking, as unreasonable premises that would not then ‘add up to’ an ‘always- acceptable’ result, because we have to actually first learn to question the ‘thing’ that we are thinking with. And no, this is not about morals or ethic either, it’s about common sense.

I’ve shared this fact many times before but I’ll say it again. I once questioned my physics teacher in junior high school about subjectivity and objectivity and said that there’s never real objectivity because we are always seeing through the same instrument, the mind, and so how can we then know what is ultimate ‘objectivity’ according to science if there’s no other way or method to measure reality with but through our bodies, our minds, our senses as human beings? No response in common sense but only through logic: well, we had to establish a convention. And this ‘convention’ as a collective agreement that we’ve formed around logic thus needs to be challenged and changed.  

I’ve seen myself and so many, well every human being in fact using logic to perpetuate a faulty state of mind wherein we actually diminish our capacity to change and take responsibility for ourselves, our lives, our every moment participation in self-creation, because we accept those premises/factors used in logic as reasons, ideas, beliefs, justifications, fears, opinions, assumptions and judgments entirely as ‘who we really are’ which in turn creates a blind acceptance and allowance of even the worst time of experiences and outcomes in ourselves just because we believe that’s ‘all that we are.’

We haven’t been taught to defy our thoughts, we haven’t learned to challenge what we believe is entirely ‘real’ of ourselves and that we believe is ‘unchangeable’ but, if it is existent at a thought, at an energetic experience level that comes and goes, if it’s a preference that can be changed with some other ‘logical statements’ in the form of persuasion from another person towards you, what do we know? It isn’t real, it’s not physical therefore it does not need to stand as this ‘ultimate truth’ that then creates a realistic/true premise that in turn creates a realistic and true outflow or consequence which we have come to simply ‘accept and allow’ and not question.

Let’s look at an example of ‘logic’ thinking without any common sense:

“If I feel bad because of another rejecting to be with me in a relationship then I have the right to get back at them with vengeance and spite, so I proceed to build up hateful thoughts about others in my mind and act them out.”

It’s a seemingly perfectly ‘logical’ example there, and a person can live by this logic for their entire lives, always getting to feel good at it because ‘it adds up’ in some way in the mind, in reasoning, but never in fact questioning every component of that equation. There is no decision in that statement to question the experience, the ‘feeling’, the assumption, the desires, the anger, the spite, the vengeance and therefore the actions that end up being motivated by these experiences in the mind that in turn can also become a real-time scenario of living out on this seemingly ‘perfectly logical’ statement, yet never questioning who we really are in those premises in the first place, what are we creating with our thoughts, are we even considering that they only reflect our nature and not at all do they in fact define others?

Fuzzy logic is the mechanism with which we instruct ourselves and machines alike to function, to create an outcome, where the input and output is determined by the programmer. There is nothing wrong with ‘the program’ as the mechanism of ‘if, then, so’- the problem is the kind of premises we use in such equation and what it reveals about ourselves, that is what needs to be questioned instead of being taken as ‘normal human emotions’ for example, because that’s why we have led ourselves to where we are now.

Another example of logic without common sense:

“When I get stressed by having to work 9 hours every day then I decide to binge on alcohol, sex and party for the rest of the weekend to chill out, so I proceed to do this religiously every single week and it’s become my lifestyle. “

Logic strikes again, ‘makes sense’ to whoever accepts such stress and relationship to work as ‘unchangeable’ as something that just ‘is’ stressful and can’t be changed, which then in turn justifies the acceptance of indulgence into all excesses as a form of ‘distraction’ to ‘relax’ as a polarity outcome to the first premise that went unquestioned in the first place. Then the result is a set of habits, patterns, addictions, social conducts or even ‘normal human behavior’ that is massively accepted as ‘how we are’ ‘how we work’ and where have we gotten ourselves to with this? Yes, to the current state of affairs in and as our world system, our societies which demonstrate there’s really no change or supportive ‘evolution’ at the moment for the most part.

The point here is to learn to question and challenge any and all premises as reasons, justifications, ideas, beliefs, notions, assumptions, perceptions, preferences, opinions, feelings, emotions, experiences that we have accepted and allowed as ‘the reality of ourselves’ without a question. It’s necessary to make that first step to investigate it all, to understand their origins within ourselves and what we have created of ourselves based on such experiences within us. Otherwise we will end up in a situation where we will justify and reason our way to end life on earth, because if we don’t question the premises to act out on it, we will end up accepting that as a ‘makes sense’ assumption and that would be the end of it all.  This potential outcome actually starts within our own minds, within our own unquestioned experiences on an everyday basis, it’s really that important to consider this point.

This is thus how and why logic is not common sense and there’s a whole lot of ‘human nature’ to debunk in what may sound ‘logical’ to most.

So, how to establish common sense and principles then to see what is real and what is not? Using self-investigation, questioning every aspect that we think is ‘who we are’ and seeing what are the outflows of me accepting an experience within us, for example, ‘rage’ within myself as an emotion, what do I motivate myself to do with it, who do I affect if I participate in it, how do I sense my physical body changes if I give into rage, what am I trying to attempt or gain from becoming enraged, what is this rage revealing about myself?  While at the same time considering what is best for all, which is something we innately would know if we had not allowed so much logical clutter in our minds and stick to referencing what we think with physical reality.

Therefore, we have to develop, practice, learn common sense and the best way is by asking yourself what is best for all, what is practically physically supportive and sustainable to live by/do/create/live as? Is this experience, this idea/belief/judgment/opinion that I have in fact a ‘reality fact’ or is it something I’ve learned, something I just ‘feel’ inside me, something I have come to believe from my parents/society?

Defying our thinking, defying our logic starts by questioning who we are in our thoughts and what nature are we cultivating in each reasoning, each premise that we then use to create our own logic – this way it is possible to use fuzzy logic in a supportive mechanism used to actually develop common sense. Here’s an example:

“If I start wanting to blame others for the experience of rejection I am feeling within myself then I forgive myself for accepting and allowing such blame to exist within me as a way to divert my attention from my own responsibility, so I can now look at how I have come to create, accept and allow this negative experience I’ve defined as ‘rejection’ within me so that I can now practically decide to change my experience in the realization that no one else can ‘reject me’ but I can only do that to myself by allowing this judgment to define who I am.”

Whole new content in the same mechanism in which logic operates, yet the outcome is completely different, one where we can actually use our thoughts, our minds to get to know ourselves, to question ourselves and even establish a self-supportive outcome to follow through towards self-change.

Test it out, see where in your thoughts you are going or stepping into the “I am feeling this therefore I don’t want do to that, so I end up deciding to not do this/that because of my experience” = logic there! Not self-support, no self-investigation which ends up in the cycles of limitation in the mind, so this is very important and you can save your life by taking the time to reference our mind-references and premises with physical reality, with that which is supportive to live in common sense.

Thanks for reading.

 

For further support if you found yourself relating to the examples provided as ‘logic without common sense’

Hitting Rock Bottom – The Crucifixion of Jesus – Part 98

What to Do at Rock Bottom – Crucifixion of Jesus – Part 99

 

 

Join us in our process of Self-Responsibility as LIFE


500. Standing in the Eye of the Storm

Or how to decide to walk through consequences in a directive and stable manner

One very supportive realization within this process of self-honesty is that whenever we face particular situations where emotions still wind up within us – like an anxiety, nervousness, stress, worry, anger – what matters is making a decision to in every moment as one is physically going through it, to breathe and reassure oneself that one is willing to and actively deciding to not engage in the experience but breathe through it, self-forgive the points that are coming up and not fight them or judge oneself for it, but see it as the momentary consequence of points that we then have to open up and become aware of for us to change them.

An emotional experience can be something like a deep sorrow for example that emerges upon having a particular big conflict in one’s life, where yes disappointment and sadness can exist, yet one has the decision and ability to see these moments as transient: they too shall pass, even if it might seem like very overwhelming in the moment. However it is also not that they will go ‘by themselves’ and so staying in a form of hope that it will change or go away, nope, that’s where we also become subject to our minds and an energy to direct ‘who we are’ in that moment, which is never supportive because emotions cloud our judgment and there’s no clarity in them.

The distinction here is to decide to breathe through the welling up of the energy, the decision is to not judge the experience either, but rather understand the situation that is leading oneself to have such ‘emotional outbreak’ – and direct ourselves, remind ourselves to breathe, self-forgive, work through the points to create a solution and at the same time ensure that the decisions to create such solutions are not being made in an emotional reaction, but as a clear decision based on what one is willing to live with and stand by, and at the same time work with it in order to correct ourselves, stop our dishonesty that caused  or contributed to create such problem or conflict and acknowledge our responsibility that is creating these consequential outflows that eventually had led us to experience the results of it all as a fall or hitting rock bottom in whichever form it might be.

A very supportive thing to do in these moments is to remind oneself that in emotions we can lock ourselves into a fogginess, not seeing ‘clear’ or getting confused, which I’ve found are the moments where I know I have to get to my writing, to lay it all out in front of me to establish self-honesty, to decide that I can stand up from this and realize that whatever is causing the reaction as an emotion or feeling, I can first look at  the cause or source of it and my direct participation in it, while at the same time knowing that this energy that has already been triggered and that I’ve come to experience is also a momentary experience if I decide to not fuel any further judgments, reasons, justifications, memories or any other element in our minds that usually unwinds more and more reactions, spiraling ourselves out of control from which we have to inevitably stand up from again.

What is a sobering decision in these moments is to stick to one’s self-honesty, to decide to not deceive oneself any further and in that even if it might seem like the toughest situation or decision to make, one can still decide to look at the source of the problem or conflict and at the same time, not fuel the problem with further emotions. That’s the actual ability we have in such situations because we’ve somehow misunderstood that emotions can bring solutions or ‘humanize’ the situation but they don’t, really. And I’ve noticed how even in such conflicts I’ve also brought up emotions that end up distorting one’s view of the facts and situation. Therefore, sticking to clarity, to the facts, to self-responsibility is one way to stand in the eye of the storm or problems within oneself and towards others.

It might seem like a daunting thing to do in those moments, but once that one realizes that emotions are only making things worse, it makes sense to walk through these difficult situations in a sober manner, meaning not elevated or ‘in a low’ as in feelings or emotions – there is a stability that is able to be found even in these worst case scenarios or situations, it takes a decision to stand, to breathe, to walk bit by bit unfurling the process to walk a solution, and remind oneself to not indulge into the experiences that might be coming up,  but push oneself to see with clarity, to stand in self-honesty.

A very supportive set of recordings on this topic are the following ones which I’d recommend listening to every now and then whenever we might be pondering ‘why’ we are facing tough times in our lives or situations that might seem out of control in our lives and these will assist in getting back to a point of self-honesty, of clarity, of self-responsibility.

 

Hitting Rock Bottom – The Crucifixion of Jesus – Part 98

What to Do at Rock Bottom – Crucifixion of Jesus – Part 99

Nowhere to Run, Nowhere to Hide – Reptilians – Part 558

 

 

Join us in our process of Self-Responsibility as LIFE


499. From Captivity to Creating the Space to Grow

Or how to create relationships as safe and supportive spaces to change and outgrow the past as individuals

 

I’ve been noticing how it is that we create our own entrapment as definitions toward one another wherein we don’t actively consider the ability for another person to change from ‘who they were’ and ‘who they are now’ and so, in a way through our interactions with each other one can create expectations about how another person ‘usually reacts’ or ‘usually responds’ to something and in this assumption, we are shutting the door to change, to enabling the other person to in fact ‘step out of character’ as their usual programming and apply themselves in their own self-change.

It’s quite a sabotaging situation really and I’ve faced both ends in my relationship with my partner where I’ve been in the position of condemning him already for something that I expect he’s done or not done or experiencing, expecting a ‘usual’ pattern that I had noticed in him – or worse! That I had assumed he was experiencing or reacting to, but wasn’t so at all – and at the same time, I’ve also now contributed to creating certain conditionings from him towards me based on initial reactions I would have to particular type of conversations to a point where then he doesn’t share about such things anymore, based on how I would usually go a whiney-reaction. Here I had to understand that I did it to myself and I caused it on another, while also reminding him that he can also assist me in letting go of that perception or anticipation and rather assist me in sharing the same points again so that I can test myself around those points.

So in this type of situations of course it takes one in a couple or in a group of people to stand up and take responsibility for acknowledging and witnessing these limiting play outs. This is precisely one of those aspects that are very important for us people walking this process from consciousness to awareness to take the lead in being the ones that step out of the ‘usual flow’ of such situations and can point out the assumptions, the limitations and the conditional expressions that are going on in both or all ways and explain them so that it becomes a supportive feedback to realize the limitation and so create a new agreement of how to approach these situations so that both or more can be supportive about it.

This is what I did recently with my partner after I noticed how I was being precisely in these two ends of the pattern, within the assumption or expecting of another to ‘do the same and not change’ while also having the other person assume that I would react to the same and so preventing it by not sharing it.

I opened this up not within a reaction or making out of it an accusatory point or blame or victimization- no, it was a simple moment of sharing what I was seeing had been happening all along with my partner, how I have in fact limited him based on the initial reactions I would see he would had towards certain things or ‘states of mind’ that I believed I could learn to ‘read’ in him, but! I would not ask directly to him, I mostly usually assumed them – or would get too inquisitive to the point that it would become too analyzing and over-patronizing from me towards him whenever I would perceive certain ‘attitudes’ or expressions, which I had to acknowledge was my own paranoia created toward him that in fact is limiting towards both of us, because it’s me existing as the expectation or even ‘fear’ of him not changing or doing the same over and over again as an experience or ‘state of mind’ within him, which now that I’ve been rather cross-referencing with him and asking directly without any whiney-tones or over-analyzing nature.

I’ve realized how I had been assuming a LOT about him,  just because I was still expecting a particular ‘attitude’ as a constant demonstration of him being at ease or calm etc. based on how I demonstrate such comfort in myself, forgetting that not everyone will ‘express it’ the same way.  Yet I’ve found that he obviously has his very own ways of being quite stable and in comfort within himself even if to me I assume he’s got a ‘straight face’ or could be ‘uncomfortable’ lol which is still indicating two things: one, that I am over-paranoid about ‘how he’s doing’ and at the same time I am expecting him to ‘become like me’ which won’t happen and should not happen in any way, because this is about him and his expression, his mind, his body, his process of awareness, etc.  I still can ask and find out that I am completely assuming something very different to what he is experiencing.

So what have I learned here? That I was over-assuming, I was creating a paranoia about ‘his states of being’ and at the same time, I was trapping him within my mind in the idea of him never changing, which is, to say the least very, very limited and quite unfair because I am holding my own previous judgments of previous moments, past times and impose them towards ‘who he is’ currently as if it is ‘still defining him’ because ‘that’s how he used to be.’

Well, this is the kind of not supportive approach towards another and here I commit myself to stop assuming and rather first Let Go of wanting to know all the time ‘how he’s doing’ because that’s actually me as expectation or rather as a ‘fear’ of ‘him not changing’ which should not exist in me either because I’ve seen how it’s not cool for me towards him nor the other way around to be holding each other captive in certain roles or characters. At the same time his process is definitely something that I don’t have to be ‘commanding’ on, we can comment and discuss stuff and get to certain understandings which is cool, but I absolutely see that I have to step down from my exigency towards him and stopping defining myself as ‘being very exigent’ towards others as well, because it becomes over-protective and this stiffness and rigidity in my stance toward another.

Here acknowledging self-responsibility for myself means I have to focus on myself and where I can acknowledge my own mistakes and control-freakism in this case and explain the patterns, acknowledge them and own them myself, which is what I’ve done towards him and explaining how I noticed this ‘trap’ that I was imposing onto him expecting ‘the worst’ when in fact this was created based on memories only and not really ‘here’ as who he is currently and the points he’s working on himself.

Therefore, I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to hold another captive in a particular character and experience of their past or how I created a usual perception of who they were when first getting to know them, wherein I still tend to want to check ‘where he is’ currently and ‘how he is experiencing himself’ as an attempt to cross reference ‘how he is changing or not’ but this is my own paranoia and it doesn’t support him either at all, while at the same time I have to completely ‘let go’ of wanting to have any impact on him and his life for the better, because this is not about ‘me wanting to achieve results upon him,’ but entirely about him and what he decides to do or not do for himself and in his life.

Therefore I have to let go of wanting to ‘know’ or ‘check him’ in that way, because placing myself in his shoes, I would not like to be treated that way either.

And at the same time I also explained to him how I have definitely caused him to now not talk about certain things based on my reactions towards that in the past. So I explained that yes, that was me in the past and I have considered and looked at the points that I have to change within myself so that he can also please assist me in continuing to open up those same points I would ‘react’ to in the past and test myself out this time around. Because! I explained that in doing so, it’s a way to assist myself in now embracing those topics, questions, aspects he brings up and watch out for my attempts to react to it, because then I would be the one creating ‘cycles’ within me toward him and vice-versa. And I also explained how I consider this is how partnership relationships become conflictive and stifled in lacking communication over time where one holds a grudge toward the other and vice-versa eventually basing the entire current-moment that is being lived conditioned to the past, to ‘who we were’ and that’s absolutely not cool, not giving any room to grow ourselves as individuals and so in the relationship.

Here, I also have become aware of how in partnership relationships, if both people ‘stick to their egos’ in the form of pride or righteousness as in believing that ‘the other person is always wrong and I am always right’ that’s the most toxic stance that creates a maiming, a stifling and stagnation in any potential growth individually or as a couple, because if we hold each other captive to ‘who we were’ or how we have come to know another ‘usually reacts to this/that’ then, we are already expecting the person to not change, to ‘remain in character’ instead of rather in those moments, stopping our assumptions, stopping our ‘expected outcomes as usual’ and give ourselves that space to grow,  that moment to breathe and settle into our potential as that chance, that opportunity for us to change, to do things differently this time around.

That’s exactly what I’ll be focusing on and applying specifically towards my partner and remind myself that it’s not up to me how he goes walking his own process of self-change, but entirely about him and his responsibility. I can only stand as an equal to him that can be a point of support, of reference of direct assistance if needed but all of this has to be done unconditionally, not regurgitating assumptions based on memories, based on the past.

What does it take to do this? It takes letting go of that tendency to want to be ‘in control’ of something and instead give space for another to breathe, to play with their own realizations and situations which has actually worked much better in other aspects where I’ve been directly not pointing out ‘all that I believe he must change’ but more have allowed him to go noticing certain things over time, and this again that I just shared is still coming from my idea, belief or perception that I am ‘more aware’ than him, but in any case whether it is so or not, I have to completely let go of a ‘knowing’ and instead simply work with what is here, in the moment, being and committing myself to be the one that stands up to ‘stop the back and forth limitations’, to remind ourselves of having to step out of these cycles of expectations and assumptions based on ‘who we were in the past’ and rather assist each other to test ourselves, who we are in every moment without expectation, without holding on to grudges which yes it is another toxic aspect in relationships where we haven’t allowed ourselves to forgive ourselves and each other for some kind of conflict in the past.

This then ensures that we can acknowledge the patterns being played out and get to our personal responsibility about them and remind ourselves/each other of it, yet it’s all up to us individually to change it, yet together in the relationship.

I therefore will continue working on becoming flexible but more so giving that space, to not ‘asphyxiate’ others when it comes to ‘pushing them to change’ in one way or another, because that is definitely not how this process works and I instead have to focus on letting go of my tendency to control and be ‘on top of all things’ as in a superiority actually fueled by fear wherein I have to be considerate of another’s process and me not wanting to ‘push’ anything, but only be an example without any hidden agenda either, otherwise I’d compromise my own self movement to do it to ‘show him’ or ‘show others’ and that’s not the point either, lol –

It’s fascinating how this whole process is really about a constant assessment of finding the equilibrium in one’s participation with others and in our lives, not going into extremes out of reactions but live words that are supportive according to the situations we’re facing, test them out and see what the outcomes are, to from that continue rearranging, re-assessing, fine-tuning and testing again… it’s a constant thing to do but a very cool one because it is about asserting our own authority as authors of our lives, of deciding to actively fine tune things that we would have normally lived out in ‘auto-pilot’ mode and this way we can challenge and so change the ‘usual ways’ that relationships had existed in this world and now turn them into ‘safe spaces’ with one another in personal agreements to commit to self-change while continuously having someone else that gets to know us very well – and vice versa – that can assist us when one is going into ‘the same old reactions’ while at the same time not being controlling or overbearing in ‘pointing all the wrong things out’ – it’s a fine balance, but with prudence it can be done.

It can be a bit complex to explain and generalize this because it all depends on each situation, but I am confident that we all can find that ‘equilibrium’ spot in our relationships which will be understood and realized and we’ll become aware of being ‘at it’ because we won’t have any conflict towards our partner or another in our minds, it will involve an immediate humbleness and consideration towards another and their life, their process, while being able to provide feedback while at the same time letting go of any ‘expected result’ out of it, and that’s how it goes. It’s like an in breath and out breath in those situations and all it takes in my case is to let go of my ego that wants to ‘control it all’ and ‘overbearing’ which I have to first apply to myself in order to not recreate these very patterns again, and that’s how I can bring the point first back to myself instead of focusing ‘on another’ or ‘another’s process’ – while also making others aware of not doing the same towards us, but be a point of support that can assist each other in facing those ‘usual points we react to’ and bringing them up again, and again, and again until we can be clear and stand through it.

Thanks for reading

 

Libera las Ataduras

 

Join us in our process of Self-Awareness as LIFE


485. Let’s Make Us F.O.O.L. Again!

Or how to point the finger back at ourselves in relation to loving or hating political effigies

 

This morning as I went to buy some tortillas (staple Mexican food) the man that was selling them was listening to the news talking about – yes, you guessed – Trump’s inauguration, the ‘riots and protests’ around the world and in various US cities. As the man was weighing the tortillas he said:

– May I ask you a question?

– Sure – I Said

– Do you think that Trump is crazy?

– No, he just represents in a more uncensored manner the human nature that we all have to change within ourselves

– I don’t think he’s crazy, being different doesn’t make you crazy

– No, he may step out of the usual politics, but he is there to show us back all the points that we need to change within ourselves and focus on that by ourselves.

End of our exchange. All that I’ve seen in the buildup to the US elections is a notorious division in people’s minds about Trump, as if he was meant to be loved or hated to the core. Now, I’d like to explain how I don’t wish to make this in any way a political blog, I’m here to share a perspective that precisely goes beyond the question that I’ve been asked several times already in terms of ‘What do I think of Trump?’ And I will share my perspective here.

At the beginning of his campaign, I did go into sharing one of his statements and calling it something like idiotic or in a similar way, only to then question myself as to what am I creating when praising or bashing any other person? I have walked a similar process with my ‘hatred’ towards the catholic church and another leader that I came to hold in my mind as ‘a despicable human being’ which I had to also walk my process in self-honesty to understand my hatred and realize that I am not in fact doing it ‘toward them,’ but it’s all about what I accept and allow within myself as a relationship or experience that I impose onto others parts of our reality, which is also parts of me. Since then, I’ve been breathing every time that I see this political leader – Netanyahu – giving any orders that I could usually squirm about and instead, breathe and live my self-forgiveness: he is another me, he is part of our consequence, we are all him, he’s playing a role for us to see what we’ve accepted and allowed ourselves to be and become.

This application has worked well, also whenever I would usually walk past a church or see the popes on the media and again ‘squirm’ or recoil within myself – but I can now see, walk past many churches (lots around here) and no longer re-create my own hatred-fixation that served no purpose other than wrecking my own body by becoming hateful, ignorantly so because my hate was never going to change the nature of humanity or of such institutions, only through actually committing myself to change can I do that, and that doesn’t require a single emotion or feeling.

During Trump’s campaign I saw and read how many people loathed him, hated his guts, ‘could not stand him’ but I decided to not participate in the praise or bash, but simply remain observant this time, not jumping into the bandwagon of people that either loved him to death or hated him to his death, literally. I then saw how the purpose of this media and political frenzy was to continue dividing and conquering people. As if it hasn’t been obvious enough – because I’ve been very vocal about it many, many times – this whole political set-up is once again getting people to hope for another person in a role we have created to precisely abdicate our personal responsibility, to change our lives, to be the difference, to be ‘the rebel’ in this case that goes ‘against the establishment’, and I’m definitely keeping an eye on how things develop because to me this Trump presidency can act as a catalyst to finally open full eyes to people that still have ideas of ‘a president being the real change’ and instead of praising or hating one single person to save the world or destroy it, rather for once and for all: Focus On Our Lives.

That spells out the word F.O.O.L. but that’s exactly what we become, fools when we follow the media waves, the political waves that are nothing else but following the same formula applied for thousands of years: create the illusion of choice, divide and conquer, create the idea of a savior and everyone will follow.

Why is this so? Because of our inherent human nature that we’ve created, accepted and allowed, to exist as a follower by default- not a genuine leader. Because we prefer to always abdicate responsibility and blame, instead of taking self-responsibility and assuming the consequences of our actions, regardless of the outcome. Because we like to fight for our limitations, instead of strengthening our strengths, strengthening our weaknesses and helping each other to become better humans every day.

The list can go on. This is why I said to the man this morning that Trump represents very well the human nature that we ALL have to change. Not sure if my words were heard, but that doesn’t matter, because I am aware of our tendency to ‘skip’ the realization that we are all Trump, we are all Netanyahu’s, we are all Hillary, we are all ‘the worst criminals in the history of humanity.’ Now we simply have to accept it, digest what it means and start acknowledging our responsibility to it all.

What I see very relevant to do is to remind ourselves is to grow out of the old, to let go of focusing so much on ‘mainstream politics’ and focus on the politics of the self, of the nature of who we are and have become to acknowledge the very same patterns ‘out there’ in the shape of our politicians and recognize that very same nature of ‘them’ existing within ourselves.

Here, I also look beyond borders. I discuss Trump even if I am a ‘Mexican’ and even if I am ‘supposed to be offended’ or supposed to be ‘hating Trump’ based on how Trump has discussed Mexicans and Mexico in his agenda. I stand clear, I am beyond a label and instead stand as a human being that can discern in common sense what is best for all and what is not. Therefore I can only take the person for the words they say and the actions they live to see how congruent they are, how much of what it is promised or spoken of becomes a reality and how much is simply part of the usual show, and from there see what are the creations and consequences of such actions. Therefore if someone would like to believe I should condemn his words or actions, I remain clear in my stance and will test out where it gets me: I cannot ‘bash’ or judge, I can only propose and create solutions that I can start living within myself and in my sphere of influence. That’s then stepping out of the ‘battle’ loop and into self-creation.

Whichever the outcomes are, I cannot judge him or anyone for that matter, no one ‘president’ will ever change anything, we all have to do that change within and by ourselves, each one of us and stand beyond the need for these fictional constructions as dinosaurs of the past, of a master-slave relationship that definitely has to crumble for the fallacy it always has been. So my perspective is that Trump’s presidency along with various ‘radical’ movements around the world can create a catalyst to for once and for all dismantle the deception that the notion of government as ‘authority’ represents. We will be giving a possibly very tumultuous and chaotic step beyond our limitations – as they say: growing pains and we as humanity definitely have to break down all illusions, shatter everything that does not stand within the principles of equality and what’s best for all – and so focus on the reality that we CAN create one by one, in living principles, without the need of a ‘master’ to guide us or save us. We have to stand in self-leadership.

I had refrained myself from talking about these topics – yet again – to me it felt like repeating myself for the 1000th time, but I’ll say it until these words are etched in our being: we are all equal and one, we all are living beings with the potential to be the best that we can in each of our contexts and positioning, we are the ones that can decide for ourselves whether we are part of the creation of the new or remain stuck in the divide and conquer left-right, blue-red, white-black paradigms of separation, of human descent of the past.

I wrote to someone in an email yesterday: let’s make the world great again, starting with ourselves! Because that’s the ultimate reality: the mirrors (me-errors) of political institutions, of ‘leaders’ and these structures of ‘power’ need to be dissolved within our minds first of all, no matter if they still remain ‘in place’ in our societies for another 100 years: we decide what we give power to in our minds, we decide whether we want to be part of the problem (old politics paradigm, black vs. white, red vs. blue, left vs. right, rich vs. poor) or do we decide to give one step beyond what is presented as ‘the ways of the world’ and stop focusing on all of that, to instead focus on ourselves, creating the lives and living the principles that are best for all.

So, what’s my stance? I choose to not judge Trump or any other political leader that a lot of people seem to get a kick out of mocking. Mocking is mocking, hatred is hatred no matter how we may want to justify it or believe such experience within us towards others is ‘well deserved.’ No, it’s not, because it’s not about ‘them’ but always about ourselves in what we accept and allow as words and experiences Within ourselves.

My personal process thus far has been of being an observer this time, not taking sides in pro or anti but simply taking the man as another me, another human being and as I practice applying on everything: investigating all things and keeping what’s best – which is a far more supportive approach than the bashing that seems to go to the left and right of the spectrum at least in the country I live in, and based on what’s going on in social media, the divide and conquer is running ‘as expected’ because WE all have participated in generating such polarity, while forgetting that’s the way we get trumped, we get conquered.

Consider seeing Trump as our reflection, as our greatest teacher as any other human being can be no matter ‘who’ they are or ‘what their position is’, he only gets the attention based on his hierarchical position, but you can surely do the same reflection with every single person in your life and around you, to see how we are judging them or generating any contempt towards them to instead ask: what are ‘they’ revealing about ourselves and how can I make sure I no longer create this inner-conflict and separation ‘towards that person’ by deciding to align my relationship to those aspects/parts of that person that I have reacted to, and instead see directly where am I living out the exact same patterns that I criticize in others. That’s one simple step into self-honesty.

Will many be willing to do this? After all of these years, I bet few will dare to because we still prefer to keep ourselves in a good light as a ‘good person’ and not question our own problems, our conflicts and admit that such contempt, hatred or antagonism toward anything in this world is in fact revealing something about ourselves that we are in conflict about and have not understood as who we have become yet.

I challenge everyone that holds dear the ‘right to protest’ to question what ‘protesting is’ and if it is in fact an honorable way to develop oneself as a self-responsible human being, one that is willing to acknowledge manifested consequences and stand as a living example of correcting those same problems within ourselves first, rather than looking outside to seek culprits and blame, which is by far and based on my personal research, a very ingrained pattern that is overlooked as an actual self-dishonesty based on the righteousness it is held by, which is nothing else but an ego experience.

That’s why I’ve been so keen to write about the actual nature of ourselves as human beings as a key point to admit to ourselves if we are to Ever in fact stand our ground to acknowledge and live our potential. We cannot grow the best and the new unless we realize the crookedness that exists in all of us – no one’s saved from this – and to learn to understand and work with the flaws, the conflicts, the problems, the destructive nature we’ve become in order to no longer judge it or judge others for it – hint, stopping using some supposed ‘authority figures’ as human piñatas – and instead, take that judgment back to ourselves to see who are we really in fueling those emotional experiences within us.

I saw videos of protests and in stability I simply acknowledge that it will still take time for humanity to outgrow the reactive, tantrum-nature that we haven’t matured from just yet… some of us are slowly but surely standing up from it, so it’s up to us to ensure that the new generations can stand in a much more independent and self-responsible individuality that is at the same time contained within the consideration of the whole as one and equal. Living principles are the key, considering what’s best for ALL in fact (not just those that we see as ‘our country’ or ‘our race’ or whichever other delusional frontier/limitation we create in our minds) is a living principle to practice in a plethora of ways.

These are all steps to go unraveling the illusion of separation, which at the same time reveals to us the potential of ourselves as creators. So, time to focus on self-creation through self-investigation, self-honesty, developing Humbleness to embrace even those we’ve labeled as ‘the worst of the worst’ as parts of ourselves as well that reveal ‘where we are’ as humanity, so we cannot just go and develop ourselves to be these wonderful beings and ‘forget about the world.’ It’s about communal ‘awakening’ for a lack of better word, but it’s not about seeking justice or hope for some other ‘king of fools’ to do the job, it’s about self-responsible living creation that we are all capable of directing in our lives.

Let’s do it and stop participating in the divide and conquer, thank you.

 

Check out this (still) very relevant video

Know Your Candidate: Trump and Hillary Revealed

 

 Point the finger back to self

 

Learn how to stand as your own authority:


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