Category Archives: space and time

253. Birth of New Consciousness–Spiritual Spitefulness

All you got to do is find your way

All you have to do is hold positive thinking

All you have to do is find the light

All you have to do is listen to your higher self

All you have to do is expect things to come  your way

All you have to do is be willing to surrender

All you have to do is seek out your greatest excitement

All you have to do is HOPE for a better time, it’ll come your way

All you have to do is find it in  your heart to give love

All you have to do is to Wait for what is about to happen

All you have to do is find your way to your heart, whatever it takes

All you have to do is become a servant of god

All you have to do is embrace your true power

All you have to do is live to the fullest and enjoying every moment

All you have to do is realize you are eternal, you cannot be lost

All you have to do is realize this world is an illusion

All you have to do is Relax, you’re gonna make it

All you have to do is look into the future and have Faith you’ll be alive

All you have to do is …. wait for more 3 years and if the world keeps going as we are and no one’s changing – then, the Mayan Guys were Wrong! LOL Sorry!

 

Aren’t such empty words another form of abuse? Absolutely  since people are genuinely asking for help/ support and all they get is fluffy words that are in No way physically, tangibly applicable and livable and in exchange, they get a good laugh from someone that is willing to perpetually lie for the sake of getting good money out of hypnotizing people with nice fluffy sugary messages that take advantage of the gullibility and state of perpetual fear that we’ve accepted and allowed ourselves to be and become.

These are all sentences you will usually get from any spiritual master and guru or channeler/ medium that claims to bring good news to the world. I was not aware of Tolle or Neale Donald Walsch, Icke or Drunvalo until I got to Desteni. And today for the first time I decided to hear what Drunvalo has to say, which is no different to any of the afore mentioned people that claim great answers reside in words like ‘love’ and ‘good will’ and ‘following your journey’ – without ever really questioning what’s of substance that is livable and applicable behind those overrated words. There’s a simple way to approach someone’s work: any piece of interview/ writing you take from any individual to investigate what they promote/ stand for, represents who they are and becomes an integral and individual account of all their body of work, since all words we speak and write ourselves as represent the point of expression we accept and allow ourselves to exist-as, not to be taken ‘lightly’ of course. This is something we also apply with ourselves as Destonians, wherein any blog we write stands as an account of sharing that which is Self Supportive for any human being that may stumble upon our writings.

What you read above is a series or patterns of sentences that I ‘picked’ up while listening to a looped video that appears on Drunvalo’s website which is no different to what any other spiritual guru’s replies wherein all is about waiting, hoping, visualizing futures, sending positive vibrations, believing in higher selves, expecting something to happen as a matter of prophecy and repeating a lot of times that he wants to help, but shows no other way other than repeating the same statements over and over again. That is not different to any channeled message you get from any entity that claims to profess some light and love and blessings for humanity. I have already repeated myself as a result of having to make something very clear here:

What is neglected, ignored or blatantly sugar coated here? Basically Everything that we are as human beings within our thoughts, words and deeds that have shaped and molded the current world we live in. One must dare to be Self Honest when sticking to a ‘spiritual highness’ while hating your neighbor inside your mind. Wanting to ‘do good’ and bring about ‘peace and joy to the world’ while satisfying one’s juiciest greedy desires. For an account of all the actual nitty gritty details of what we’ve become – and none of the spiritual teachers ‘teach you’ how to deal with – you can read any of our Journey To Life blogs and any blog you pick from the archives of this very blog here. What you’ll find is ourselves, people that once held ‘high spirits’ for change, hope and bliss and were equally high to anyone that is at the moment seeking a solution to the problem that we’ve made of our lives in this world  in sugar coated words that repeat like mantras intended to keep a human being subdued, like sedatives/ drugs to ‘calm down’ the mind and any intent for actual ‘critical thinking’ that should be veered toward questioning virtually everything of this world that we’ve blindly followed as ‘who we are’ and ‘why we are here.’

 

 

We’re taking responsibility for everything we have become. We are no longer ‘waiting’ and we understand that there will be No Transformation of Consciousness, since consciousness is the very part/ aspect of what we’ve become that we’ve accepted and allowed ourselves to direct our lives in the name of following energy/ the mind/ all the illusions and delusions of grandeur that could separate us more and more and more from the physical body, from the matter that is here and that is currently existing as the manifested consequence of us following our heavenly minds waiting and hoping for something just ‘great’ happening our way.

 

What happens is: it’s very easy to get excited about a ‘change’ in spirituality, as that usually implies no physical change, because of the excuse that ‘it is at a spiritual level’ = invisible/ non tangible level;  one would have to be deliberately fooled to not see the lies within this. 

 

Realizing that we have to In Fact work with ourselves in the very detail of who we are and what we’ve become is the reason why many are too afraid to give up that which makes you feel good, special and enlightened, as that’s what spirituality basically sells. What’s not usually understood is how liberating it is to stop waiting, hoping, dreaming, praying chanting, wishing, having faith, carrying stones, crystals, cards, reading endless books of positive messages, hearing channeled messages, watching people sitting on white blankets laughing at you if nothing happens in 3 years from now on… At Desteni we have instead begun a process of Self Forgiveness for having sought for solutions outside of ourselves or in any piece of ‘miraculous message’ or expecting ‘angels’ to be guiding us to fulfill any spiritual journey.

 

The only journey is getting ourselves out of this hell that we are blindly veiling with deception after deception of which spirituality and all things invisibly ‘great’ are causing as a result of a Collective Unconsciousness, wherein we’ve been literally existing as mind-drones following the mind’s/ consciousness direction that will only regard Energy and all things abusive to Life and never ever questioning but WHY are we waiting, hoping, praying, asking for something while all we can see is each other on Earth destroying all? Why would we even have to wait for a change if all changes are visibly aspects of a political, economical and social system that requires basic principles as a foundation to manage ourselves as humanity. Anything less than investigating this reality as the actual Problems we’re facing will lead you again to hoping, waiting, chanting and hypnotizing yourself into believing there’s nothing to do and some magic wand will come and wipe our mess all of a sudden.

Visit the Capitalism vs. Equal Money Group for further context of what is Really Real.

This is the actual disease and mental disorder, fellow human beings, the acceptance and allowance of the excitement for all things ‘positive’ while deliberately ignoring and neglecting HOW we caused the problems in the first place.

There is support for you to actually give an END to the lies that we’ve fed ourselves with and that we’ve all co-operated with, since Money is no different to any other spiritual tool that only works for some chosen ones only. Investigate Desteni, Equal Money System and realize that there is no God/ Alien/ Force going to save us, but we require to rather stop fooling ourselves, take the wheel of our lives here on Earth, educate ourselves, educate our children within the principles of Equality to make everyone aware of the level of abuse that hoping, waiting, wishing leads to: a lazy humanity that is willing to follow prophecies till the end of their individual lifetimes and allow kids to continue being starved and women to continue giving birth to beings in this world that exists in negligible conditions, instead of actually caring just a little bit about the lives of those that genuinely physically suffer on Earth, a suffering that is the direct outflow of those with light/money/energy – which is all of us that have the ability to write, speak, have education and the means to publish this and as such, make a decision to support what is REALLY HERE as the Real Problems that have always begun at a thought level, which is the spiritual realms we have all embodied and spited life with – it is time to Stop.

Get to know yourself: Investigate the Desteni Lite Process, a Free Online Course wherein  you’ll be able to actually ‘find your way’ through your own directive will to write yourself to become aware of all of which we have participated in as a force of self interest instead of having considered the laws of the physical wherein each individual part is required to stand as a responsible-actor and walk a corrective process to ensure we don’t ever delude ourselves with our own words as creations that stand for a fallacy that is diverting our actual ‘point’ of our lives, which is ourselves as physical beings, as part of the whole. This is the actual Standing up for Life that no one in their full sanity and self awareness will turn down as an opportunity to finally learn how to live.

 

Further Support

 

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Further delusional news:

Meet the women who talk to angels: Ever felt that someone’s watching over you? A survey reveals 41 per cent of us believe in heavenly guardians

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129. Will Love and Lighters end up Killing People?

All the positive babble exists as a cover up to the Extreme Fear that exists within ourselves as part of our who we have accepted and allowed ourselves to be and become as the mind, which is certainly NOT Benevolent, and this has been explained throughout many, many hours of interviews within the Desteni Material that’s being published on a regular basis – and recorded daily – available at Eqafe. Now, paraphrasing The Soul of Money – Fear and the Law of Attraction – Part 32 How on Earth can we think, believe or perceive that Energy in any way can change this physical existence? And I’m not even going to talk about the Law of Attraction particularly here, but more about the actual fucked up counter-effects that must be realized and taken into absolute consideration in order to Open up our EYES to see what type of hell we’re creating for all equally every time that we indulge to seek for all ‘the good’ and ‘light’ and ‘love’ as peddled by several masters, light workers and your regular Jesus follower – repeat: follower.

 

Disclaimer’s notice:
A punctual fact to avoid misinterpretation and or potential claims of slander: This blog is for the purpose of exposing that which  many human beings are NOT willing to accept exists within our thoughts. This is an educational blog that serves as a point of reference in order to give actual self-support for people that may encounter themselves creating positive feelings to cover up potential Real harm toward other human beings. Assist and support yourself with it instead.

 

Lieght

 

Who we are as the Mind existing in positive and negative thoughts as feelings and emotions?

Let’s look at a white light slim-line tube: electricity bounces back and forth from Cathode – the negatively charged pole –  to the positively charged pole, the Anode. Due to the velocity that the energy bounces back and forth we cannot see this light bolt happening, we only get to see the apparent constant stable beam of milky white light that ‘enlightens’ our night. Now,  this light is exactly similar in nature to the energy we are constantly generating through our participation in the mind, existing as that blinding imposed invisible light that are the thoughts, feelings and emotions; however, the point to realize is how to generate so ever-lasting surrogate company as our mind that experiences life as an energetic sparkle all the time, is actually only able to exist through/by consuming/gnawing our very own physical flesh/tissue in order to generate such a perfect ‘stream of consciousness’ that is our mind, that apparently divine white light that as our thoughts, emotions, feelings and any general mind-activity that is absolutely invisible and intangible to our physical 5 senses – yet, we act upon it and we live according to what goes on in our minds. Hum, what’s wrong with this picture?

 

Why do we practically use light?

We use a light because we don’t want to remain in darkness, we’ve been taught that ‘we must fear the dark’ as children– yet in terms of who we really are as physical beings, darkness is who we are: there is no light inside our body to circulate our blood or digest our food, the body is not afraid of the dark, it is ourselves as the eyes of the mind that perceive light as all the relationships that are existent within our reality, no different to all the thoughts that run rampant in our minds generating a positive or negative experience within ourselves all the time – that’s the ‘light’ of ourselves, that’s our ‘light on’ all the time that we keep ‘on’ because of our ingrained ‘fear  of the dark,’ where everything is pitch black because there is no friction causing light to be seen, there is no movement, just silence, stillness and that’s what we are actually able and capable of  living as in our day-today-living and ‘waking’ reality once that we start walking a process of Self-Forgiveness in Self Honesty to start seeing Who We Are if we stop participating in the constant coming-and-going from cathode to anode as thoughts generating either negative or positive experiences that only exist within ourselves: they are thus Not Real.

 

The Dark as Nothingness

The absence of light is so feared –  there is no energetic spark going back and forth generating enough friction to generate light. We then see the energy as this ‘beautiful light’ yet, we are unaware of the friction that causes and generates this friction in the first place, which is in the case of our own minds creating an entire positive experience that bounces off from an absolute negative point,  which is the current ‘normal’ state of being’ as human beings and also the reason why we are always trying to generate a positive feeling and experience in order to be suddenly ‘lifted up’ from the negative to the positive, without realizing that there is a definitive friction that must be ‘kept in place’ to keep the white light on. The same goes on in our minds.

For further reference listen to: The Soul of Money – The Interconnection between Thoughts, Energy and Light – Part 5

 

Love and Light VS Hate and the Dark

If we have a look at the world, all wars, all conflict, all friction from a single inner-battle in our minds to world-wars is a conflict generated from the perceived positive against the perceived negative that we have acquired/ adopted from those that have gone before us – nothing else but a mere belief system placed to cause deliberate conflict. I strongly suggest you read the blog on Morality written by Esteni De Wet who explains one of the several dimensions that exist as morality, which is one of the primary causes and pillars of our current ‘distress’ that we exist as when having a polarized view of our reality.

 

Everything that is here of this world as physicality just IS – there is no tags or barcodes or statistics that indicate us what is to be seen as positive and what is to be seen and regarded as negative. We are the ones that impose these values that are created in our minds and imposed onto the physical, no different to how we have created our monetary system of ‘profit’ and ‘debt’ while using the constancy and consistency of a physical world to generate the actual ‘goods’ that are sold for profit – not to mention the living beings such as animals that are also part of our self-abusive system. The Earth as nature does have/show ‘negative numbers/ red numbers:’ it is us that are now extracting the resources to the point of depletion that are assessing now an actual physical loss.

And, the question is WHY are we causing this Loss as the physical world that is here? Simple: we are using/  abusing the physical reality in order to generate our Positive experience powered by Lights as the symbol of an apparent civilization that thrives in a ‘shining light’ without ever considering what must be consumed in order to sustain what is and has become an artificial living within our world. Why artificial if everything is ‘Natural’? Because we are using artifacts/ means/ ways to create an apparent comfortable/ joyous/ copious and abundant life out of the inherent and necessary abuse to generate such positivity.

 

Your De-Light is Made out of Someone’s Dis-Grace

An Easy example: how can I now be experiencing the joy of my coffee at the moment? Several indigenous people had to work for months to take care of coffee plants that they are bound to in order to have an ability to take proper care of their plantations, dedicating their days to ensure that the weather and conditions are adequate to keep the plantations in a mint state, so that they can eventually be reaped and seek for a buyer that is willing to take it. This pay is definitely not fair as anything else in this world wherein Money does not equate Life. The coffee cultivators are paid close to nothing for their hard work while the distributer and seller makes an excellent business from it, creating as much as 100 percent of profit – or more – from a job that is certainly not remunerated well at all. Then me as the happy coffee consumerist, go and buy that coffee, being oblivious to the processes behind me having these now roasted beans ready to be brewed into my ‘De.Lightful coffee cup’ – and this is just one single example of EVERYTHING in our world that is built upon abuse, and I didn’t go as far as talking about the lives of the people that cultivate coffee such as:  their financial problems, their lack of education, the lack of money to expand their crops, the lack of understanding of the capitalist world so that they could sell and commercialize their own coffee – YET we are delighted with our coffee cup. This is how a positive experience stems from a negative experience, and this can be applied to all and everyone in our reality.

 

Hence the reason why when talking about bogus like ‘Love’ and ‘Abundance’ and ‘Prosperity’ and ‘Happiness’ and ‘Bliss’ among other words are just euphemisms for the human-driving-force that Money and Sex represent as the ultimate ‘goal’ in any thinking being. How limited have we become: being consumed by a desire to just be a freaking spark as energy bouncing from cathode to anode in the white-light slim line tube that seeks all means and ways to just continue generating that friction in order to produce the majestic white bright light that EnLIEghtens our hearts, and fills us with JOY! Oh great! and… where is the abuse behind this bright blinding light? Everywhere behind the processes of that enchanting delight.

This is how our world is created at the moment.

 

In the next blog, I’ll continue explaining How it is that I am saying that Love and Lighters can become potential Killers if they don’t stop existing as an ultimate positive experience and face their fears, take self responsibility for their positive thoughts and become actual trust-worthy living human beings that can be endowed with actual responsibilities that are in fact honorable and honoring Life in Equality – after all, isn’t that what SHOULD be a Love and Light Principle? Doing what’s Best for All?

There’s a certain difference from thinking positive to DOING/ LIVING/ Acting in the best interest of all – one requires an imaginative high on happy-pills mind to exist and the other one actual physical work and effort to do so.

Sounds like a threat? No, sounds like a wake up call that everyone – including myself of course – must take on to see where and how we are wanting to STICK to our positive experience that SICK-Ends and clouds our common sense to realize that any single moment that we are only going after that which is BEST FOR ME/MYSELF/I only is directly creating a weapon against the whole.
And that, we’ll walk in the following blog

Desteni

Desteni I Process

Desteni Forum

Equal Money System

2012 The Year of Self Transformation –  Facebook Group

Journey to Life on Reddit – Daily blogs to debunk the LIEs in our world.

EnLIEtenment

 

Vlog:

2012: Nothingness — the 7 Year Process to Birthing Self as Life

 

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Must hear Interviews to Educate yourself about the Truth and Reality of our World:


85. Death to the artist–Bearthing Life

To stop the characterization in our lives implies self forgiving the configuration of our programming to instead, direct ourselves to be and become the actual living physicality that only requires to establish one single principle to be able to coexist: Life in Equality.

 

Any personality and its various characters leads us to act/ do/ say and think according to one single limited character frame that we have accepted and allowed ourselves to reduce ourselves to. Thus, within this I see, realize and understand that the end of the illusion is here as myself, in every moment that I decide to breathe, be here as the physical instead of perpetuating the lie of ‘who I am’ as a character in my mind and toward others.

This is the second part to 84. “What are you up to?”  seen from the perspective of the pattern such interactions represent within the context of who and what we become as ‘characters’ in the world system that exist as such just to live as illusions and delusions that have never in fact ever Lived. Thus, it is within me that the ability to ensure I establish myself here as a living physical being exists – this is to stop complying to playing the game/ being a player in the game we have called ‘life,’ which has never in fact being Living but only getting high on energy up to the last drop to then decay and die as the fleeting spark we have diminished ourselves to be.

 

Hence, this is the end at the moment for the ‘artist character’ in various dimensions as examples of what one single personality possesses our very being wherein we forget about the actual reality that we exist as, and become nothing else but another player in the chess game battlefield that we have superimposed to the unconditional physicality of ourselves here. It’s time to take off the costume – I am here to live, not survive.

 

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to realize that the moment I comply to communicate with another based memories, I am in fact re-creating the same illusion that we have bound ourselves to – and by illusion is to understand that it was never in fact real – thus what is the point in perpetuating a Lie toward ourselves and others if we already understand that, within keeping ourselves as such lies we are in fact abusing of this entire reality from life after life after life, just because of this single acceptance of individualized characters that communicate as characters, fulfilling experiences as characters in this staged world-system wherein nothing that we have ‘created,’ has ever been REAL in fact, but only consequence of our eternal drive to ‘fulfill ourselves as characters,’ without ever seeing ourselves as the origin of such ‘search’ in the first place – thus running around in circles, chasing after chasing ourselves only, but always veiling ourselves from realizing this because of the actual positive experience we all sought for as energy itself.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think, believe and perceive that I’ve wasted an entire education on art because I am not creating any longer, without realizing that self interest would be to stick to doing something that I realize is not supporting myself as one and equal, and instead do it to simply satisfy the character that I was supposed to be.

 

When and as I see myself thinking that I wasted an entire ‘art career’ because I am no longer creating, I stop and I breathe. I realize that I’ve actually wasted entire lifetimes seeking to fulfill a character that was never in fact real in the first place – thus I let go of any ideal/ belief or perception of anything having any substantial ‘worth’ as myself here – I realize the fulfillment of the illusion was what kept me busy as only a character seeking to fulfill its due-characterization which is not who and what I am here as the physical.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear what others have to say in relation to my life as a ‘drop out of character’ without realizing that standing ‘as’ the character and fulfilling a life as such is the actual enslavement that we’ve all complied to without a question, wherein we buy into social pressures of ‘who we are’ toward others, instead of realizing that in playing such which-character-are-you-today game, we are in fact binding ourselves to an enslavement to the mind, the character and the stage alike.

 

When and as I see myself thinking that I have ‘wasted myself because of not following through art-education,’ I stop and I breathe. I realize that this is just a victimization character to keep the mind preoccupied thinking that there’s something ‘wrong’ that was done with that – and instead direct myself to see how I have only been playing out a ‘character game,’ entertaining myself as whether I did good or not, without realizing that while existing lost in such characterization, I missed the entire reality that is here and that I was only focusing on me-as-the-character, missing the reality that we are binding to our mind-illusions, seeking to fulfill each other in order to not see what we are in fact doing/ consuming every time that we ‘call ourselves by our character,’ and thinking that it is ‘normal’ to exist like this.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to ever make of ‘art’ something important, without realizing that it was just another mind possession that I took on for the evasion it represented just as anything else- and I realize that it could have virtually anything of this world that I could have grabbed-on in order to make it ‘my own’ and ‘my thing’ in life, which is the only way we have kept ourselves busy in our minds, fulfilling each other with lies to believe that ‘what we are seeing/ hearing/ experiencing’ within ourselves is ‘real’ as ‘who we are,’ when in fact: it never was.

 

When and as I see myself placing ‘what I do’ as more than myself, I stop and I breathe – I realize that anything that I make to validate myself as a character is only serving the ego of the mind and not who I really am as a physical being that certainly does not require any form of recognition or validation from an external source to verify that ‘I am here.’ Thus I commit myself to establish the totality of myself as here in every moment of breath wherein I do not require to become a character or ‘create’ something in order to ‘exist.’

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to play out characters that seek to validate their own creation as real and ‘meaningful,’ without realizing that it is just another form of praising each other’s character as to see who becomes the best actor of it all, and as such get the most reward in the name of ‘who I am as the mind,’ instead of realizing that in / as the physical there is nothing to recognize as superior or inferior, there is no need to prove yourself to others, there is no need to become something ‘better’ for others to see or praise. Therefore

 

 

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When and as I see myself diminishing myself to become a character in order to fulfill the idea/ memory that others have of myself, I stop and I breathe. I realize that self-as-here cannot possibly continue perpetuating the same game of ‘who you are’ and ‘prove yourself to others’ in order to satisfy a world system that thrives on personalization to create specialized fields to entertain ourselves in, believing that ‘we have to become a character for others, otherwise we are no alive!’ which is how we have compromised, abused and used the entirety of who we are in the name of that fleeting sparkle of ‘personality’ aiming to get ‘high’ in the world system, while neglecting the actuality of how we were able to do this as an absolute consumption of ourselves, reducing life to a single gimmick of living. That is not who I am and I commit myself to establish myself as the physicality in every moment of breath, stopping all forms of mind delusions that come up as temptations to follow through with a positive experience. I realize the illusion for what it is and remain constant and consistent here as breath.

 

I forgive myself that I ever accepted and allowed myself to reduce myself to being a single ‘bright spark’ as the character that I sought to be and become in absolute ignorance of what is it that I was in fact using and abusing to fulfill my desires, hopes, wants, dreams, wishes throughout lives, never ever pondering about anything else but ‘who I am’ as this someone that ‘must become someone better/ greater no matter what,’ and within this single acceptance of becoming a professional in something, a single career, a single character I complied to playing the game of the world system of characters, believing that the most important decision in my life was ‘who I will be/ become when I grow up’ based on the limited variation of characters that I saw as ‘available’ and even with that, having chosen one that I could use as a means to apparently ‘evade’ reality, never realizing that I cannot escape reality at all and that wherever I go I am here – thus, I direct myself to face myself in every moment of breath to ensure that I stop the stupidity cycles we’ve existed as the mind, creating further separation from one another by fully embodying characters that never regarded life as ourselves here – but always used it and abused it to fulfill a program, a script as the character.

 

When and as I see myself loading memories to fulfill the idea of myself toward others in relation to the character I had accepted and allowed and defined myself to be, I stop and I breathe – I realize that the only way I can be real and exist here, is here as breath as the physical – and I dare to stop the illusion within another toward myself, as I realize that the very least moment that I ‘give in’ to play the same old game, I give into the character version of myself that is not real – hence I commit myself to be the one that places a final stop to characters and to face the reactions as what they are, characters complaining a character loss in another, as that debunks the happy-go-lucky character world that we’ve enslaved ourselves within and as.

 

I realize that it apparently takes courage to do this, however if we don’t do it we simply doom ourselves to a finite version of who we are yet again, which is unacceptable and this is how it must be stopped No matter What.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to become a character that compromises itself as a character that depends on other characters to survive, which is how essentially we have limited, diminished and made ourselves dependent on a monetary system based upon abuse, determining ‘who we are’ in relation to others according to the amount of money we have a ‘power to exist,’ which is absolutely ludicrous when realizing that we actually would not require this enslavement at all, we have become it because we decide to become a character that seeks for its ‘great high’ instead of realizing ourselves as what is here, in its totality – which is how I see and realize that any point of ‘great potential’ could only exist as an illusion of who I am as the mind – and that the only reality that I actually exist as is the physicality that I am here as, which doesn’t require anything else but itself to exist.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to preoccupy myself with trivial experiences in relation to ‘the character’ that I’ve become in relation and toward others, without realizing that the only thing I really feared was losing the recognition and support of other characters to ‘my character,’ which was the way to simply continue lying to each other in believing ourselves to be these unique individuals as ‘special characters,’ without realizing what we have actually done to ourselves and each other as this entire world system that thrives on the ‘evolution of characters’ that consume more, that have specialized ‘likes’ and preferences that can only benefit a world system that only seeks to fulfill itself and never has in fact realized or supported life.

 

Thus, I commit myself to restore the world order, the life order on Earth and to expose the simplicity of the realization of how we diminish ourselves every time that we seek to ‘create’ in separation of ourselves something just to satisfy our characters.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience any form of guilt or remorse for stepping out of character toward others, without realizing that this belief of ‘biting the hand that feeds,’ is only a blackmailing mechanism used to always maintain each other’s character in place, seeing the ‘out of character’ as a betrayal and often ostracizing anyone that would dare to ‘step out of character’ to point out any for of reality, because they represented a potential threat to this entire world system of characters. Thus I realize how any point of realization that I could have ever experienced in relation to ‘having to choose what character to become in life’ and that I deliberately placed aside, I did so because I could not fathom not having a character to stand by in the world system, which proves to what extent we have become the very ‘masters’ of our own enslavement, believing that we had to fear losing our character as we would experience ‘rejection’ from others, because this is exactly how we have threatened each other to ‘remain in character,’ just like a gang wherein if one decides to stop being a member of it: they are haunted, ostracized, criticized, denigrated and sometimes even killed just because of not complying to ‘the rule of thumb’ of a majority that sought to keep the illusion in place, as the illusion ‘pays off great experiences,’ without even questioning why such experiences could only last but for a moment and never ever could remain here eternally as ourselves, because we actually doomed ourselves to death the moment that we chose to only be these fleeting characters and not life eternal.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to diminish myself to ‘have to make a living’ in the world system based on becoming a character that could be ‘acceptable’ as a way to make money/ make a living wherein I could in one way or another have to comply to others’ characters in order to build mine – this implies that from the moment that I accepted people as relationships in separation of myself as equals, I complied to the game; and all the way throughout the basic indoctrination as part of the system called ‘education,’ I became aware of what character I had to be/ become and play in order to survive, which is how I accepted the requirement in the system to become a character as the only way to survive, because: if I didn’t do it, I would have no means to get money – and because I knew that we depend on money = I had no other option but to become part of it and in doing so, complying to each and every single rule that we’ve enslaved ourselves to wherein Life is not unconditionally supported and provide for all as equals, but is and has been instead only used as cannon fodder to win our battles upon others and make ourselves ‘great’ in our own minds, without realizing that who and what we have become in such characterization is promoting, supporting each other’s illusions/ delusions as only being ‘someone’ in our minds, in the world system, while missing out the actuality existing here at all times, covered up with this gimmicky living-reality that in no way supports life, that We have accepted and allowed as an actual prison to ourselves – and I cannot fathom how we have not realized this before.

 

Therefore, and hereby I commit myself to break the illusion, to stop my own characterization based on that complied-to character that I chose myself to be in all ways and through doing that, establishing myself as the physical which is what is tangibly here as myself, which is what I am certain of I really am – as if I don’t eat, I die – and that any other ‘idea’ that people of ‘my past’ had about myself is no longer relevant to who/ what I am here, in every moment of breath, physically.

 

I realize that all memories were only illusions and that complying to one single memory of who I am is enslaving myself and others to the same illusion. I commit myself to expose the illusion I had become through continuing writing, applying self forgiveness for the stupidity loop that we’ve been and become as this ridiculous existential fuckup that we have remained blind within until now. I understand the crucial point we’re currently living in, and that it is our decision to stop it here in every moment, breath by breathe, as we walk this process to finally break the illusion/ see behind the veil that we had covered ourselves up with in order to not face the truth that is not pretty nor is it gruesome, but only the reality and consequence that does not require to be qualified but only seen, understood and corrected as ourselves into a best for all living principle that I establish here as myself.

 

“I commit myself to show – how we have never in fact in equal and one awareness with ourselves, our beingness in our equal and one relationship with the physical/physical-body,DECIDED /directed ‘who we are’ in moments of interaction/participation with others, because our responses/experiences/relationships with others have always been dependent/created/manifested from MEMORIES as characters of our parents’ Minds within ourselves, that’s determined ‘who we are’ and ‘how/what we live’ and ‘experience’-ourselves as, as individualized characters in relation to others’ behaviour/physical-responses to/towards us in moments of physical-reality participation/interaction. Thus, we’ve constructed/created ourselves as memories/characters from memories/characters, and so have never actually in fact lived/really decided ‘who we are’ in our living, interaction and participation in existence as memories had come to control our entire mental-physical relationship from birth to who/how we are now in our entire mind-physical existence.” – Sunette Spies *

 

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Day 85: And God Created Slaves by Bernard Poolman 
“I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that by AcceptingGod as the Ultimate Creator that Created All as it is, I accept and allow the Existence of Slavery in all dimensions like: Child Slavery, Debt Slavery, Sex Slavery – and that My attempt to change this Slavery while I accept God in this Position as Creation will be futile – as I, in my attempt to Stop Slavery, will be acting against my own Belief and Faith in God – and as I Gave all Power to God, I will be Powerless and thus Slavery will Not end in all its Forms, as I am the ONE that Create it through My Acceptance of God as Creator. Thus, the Decision must be clear. I am the One that Decides that Slavery must Exist, as I am the One that Decides that God must Exist, as I am the One that claims I can never understand God, as Why God Created all that is, According to God’s Will, as I am the Slave that must Exist so that God can Exist, as I am the One that Decides – and thus I must be God that Creates the Slavery, as I have my Reasons why I create Slavery, because I Can – as I am the One that Allows Me to Create a World in which Life is Not Equal For ALL – and for Slavery to Exist,Inequality Must exist – as I am the One that Created Inequality, as I vote for it in Every Election, and I vote for it every time I buy Goods Created by Slaves, Wage Slaves – this world through the Ages has been and will Be what I decide, as I am the One as the Image and Likeness of God with Free Choice that can decide Anything, even to Be the Slave or God that will decide whether slaves will Exist. Thus, I am the One that Must change theWorld to One where there are NO MORE Slaves – Meaning, I must Be the One that Cleans Up the Mess on Earth, Bringing Life Back as Myself, as Equal and One, in Each One – so that, in Fact, we are All Equal as Creators, making Sure we DO NOT FORCE each other Into Slavery, as I AM the One that Decides, as You are the One that Decides – and this is the Decision I must Make in Every Breath, as Who I Am: that which is the Change to What is Best for all, or that which is the Chains that Enslaves Myself and Everyone else to this ILL LOSING. Thus, I decide in Every Breath to be the Change that will Breath by Breath Create a Reality Where For Real All will be Equal and All Life will Be supported One and Equal, as I Give to ALL what I would Like to Receive – and thus I will Be the One that Receives, and so We as One, as we Decide and Live the Living Action of the Living Word of the Decision, will bring into Being Life in the Physical, and SO we will Be the One that is God in Every Breath, Creating the Character that Life Must Be to Be What is Best for ALL Life, Always.” – Bernard Poolman

 

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Fin


Day 44: The Evil Veil of Me

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to ever pursuit the positive in life and believing that that was ‘the path’ that I had to walk as it would make me be a ‘better human being’ while neglecting the fact that such positive energy was in fact the result of the actual evil as the bastardization of life to energy wherein I made sure that ‘who I am’ as a point of separation from the whole always stands on the ‘positive side’ which I allowed myself to deliberately ‘stick to,’ regardless of the actual inner-experience that would come up when being possessed with anger and obsessive thoughts as a child, which then developed into generating a double experience within myself wherein within the outside I would present an affable and charismatic persona, but in the inside I judged my very own participation as I knew that it was only fake and ‘to get by’ within the standards of society that I always accepted as ‘how things are’ without daring to really question it as to How it is that we were all just playing games of pretending to care about each other.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to exert that inner inexplicable irritation toward myself as a child as a gnawing experience that I would then try and exert out as annoyance, annoying others and seeking attention because I did not know why I was experiencing such inextricable physical discomfort wherein I just wanted to peel myself off of my physical body.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to develop obsessions from a very young age wherein I would feed my obsessions with constantly thinking about something until I would get it, and I would then experience the temporary relief of finally ‘achieving’ something that I wanted, only to find something else to obsess about in no time, which is how I became used to being holding on to a future-experience of self-gratification which is how we are currently living as beings that only care about the immediate instant-gratification wherein there is no actual regard for that which we are consuming in the name of such gratification.

 

I forgive myself that I always accepted and allowed myself to believe that through sticking to the positive self-experience I was being a ‘good being in existence’ without ever, ever imagining that this is the actual evil of this world as all the spiritual beliefs and ideas of positive, light and benevolence stem from the very acceptance of that inherent separation of who we are as one and equal, thus becoming a worshiper of the very evil that has leads us to exist in the current state we’re living in as humanity, which is now, more clear than ever, that is taking a toll on all of us that believed that we were ‘on the good path’ of walking with and as the ‘good guys’ while neglecting that in reality, it was the other way around.

 

I forgive myself that I ever accepted and allowed myself to ‘fear the evil’ and react to such word without ever having known that everything we have been and manifested as the consequence of our primordial separation has been evil, pure evil in nature, which then explains how I would constantly hold the thought-pattern about ‘Humanity being evil’ and creating this constant ‘hardening’ experience when being ‘exposed’/ being interacting with human beings as I believed everyone was ‘on to get me’ and ‘against me,’ which explains how retreat, isolation and the desire to simply interact the least possible stemmed from this that I deemed as ‘irrational fear’ – yet it was real as the actual nature that exists as all of us, not only myself and that I can only see and understand it for what it means to ensure that I walk the process to stop any form of continuation to degrade and defy life in the name of any form of energy – whether positive or negative – it is my responsibility to stop all patterns of energy within myself, as I realize that this is the only way that I can give myself back to myself the points that I had initially separated myself from.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to ever only seek to be a positive-supporter a ‘cheerleader’ when it came to positivity and positive experiences, without realizing that within this I had made of reality nothing else but a chemical reaction that would only make me Feel Good about myself and my thoughts and place myself into this angelic pedestal, while neglecting the fact that the foundation to such experience was stemming from the actual evil that we became the very moment that we accepted and allowed ourselves to be the cause and effect of energy as the result of the desire to ‘experience’ and ‘be more’ than ourselves as equality and oneness, which means that I abdicated the wholeness of myself and vulgarized it to me being and becoming only a single experience that would only continue to keep satisfying itself through generating the same positive experience within the participation with others in reality, using them/ using life as a way to transform it into the necessary crutch for my self elation.

 

I forgive myself that I ever accepted and allowed myself to try and ‘fix the world’ in separation of myself and believing myself to be a ‘good natured being’ when in fact, I was only trying to save my own ass when it comes to realizing that any desire to do good was actually stemming from the fear that I had realized was absolutely undeniable within me, which is how I feared everything that had to do with ‘dark’/ ‘darkness’ and ‘evil’ because I had feared myself as my own ‘evil’ experience/ thoughts/ imagination that I had not been able to communicate with others, because of fearing being judged for having such experiences within me, which reveals to what extent we as human beings experience these type of inner confusion and not knowing how to ‘deal’ with it, because we were always taught to simply ride the wave of experience until it ‘fades out’ – yet not really understanding why and how I would suddenly have ‘evil thoughts’ as a child toward people in my reality, with no apparent reason, which is what manifested that self-annoyance and irritation that I tried to cover up with a positive attitude and being just cheerful, because I knew that that would keep me ‘safe’ from the evil that I actually feared as myself.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to ever pursue a ‘light working career’ wherein I would dream of being able to ‘help people’ and make this world a ‘better place’ by implementing solutions that had to do with giving hope, having faith and believing that ‘after all, it all must come down to a positive end’ – which is in fact the problem that hope instills and creates in this reality as a the laxity wherein the real nature that must be worked with through writing, applying self forgiveness and  the Self Corrective Application had been simply pushed down and covered up with all things positivity, which is like trying to build a solid foundation upon a swamp.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to ever seek relationships as a way to make myself feel better about myself, without realizing that it is through the nature of relationships that our ‘real nature’ was shaped and formed, which implies that creating relationships was an automated way to continue the perpetual desire to ‘be more’ than myself because relationships in themselves already imply separation and energetic experiences created from that moment of separation toward that which we are attempting-to and trying to reunite with. Which means that I had only reinforced separation through trying to connect/ establish relationships due to such separation only existing as an energetic experience that doesn’t consider the actual physicality as the fabric of existence as substance/ as life of which everything and everyone is made of.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to deem that everything that was ‘evil’ in this world had nothing to do with me, which was me neglecting my very own thoughts as the constant seeking for power, control, recognition, glory, instant-gratification as a constant ‘win-win’ desire within me, which is the actual core and initiation of all evil in this world wherein ‘who I am as money/ power’ is all that really drives us to want to ‘be something/ someone’ in life, which is Not living but instead agreeing to play the game and ride the ‘waves of success’ that we all comply to live in within this system that only cares to perpetuate such constant fueling of experiences, instead of regarding and supporting life in equality, which is now our duty to establish as a living principle on Earth.

 

I commit myself to debunk any inkling and remain of positivity within me as I walk myself out of the mind and into the physical, remaining as the awareness of who I have become as a result of having lived in fear of ‘the evil’ in me for such an extensive period of time, wherein morality took the place of any form of common sense and in that, becoming a biased being that only cared about listening, doing, being, supporting all things positivity for a while, while having been on the exact opposite, which lead me to a final great confusion within my life that actually lead me to Desteni and that I see and realize is the only way to stop ALL Confusions that we may have in this world when wanting to deliberately stick to the positive out of the actual fear of ourselves, fear toward fellow human beings, because we see and realize that our actual current natures is that of evil that is also a veil that we have created upon ourselves the moment that we accepted and allowed ourselves to live as energy only, as an energetic presence instead of a physical beingness that requires no definition to exist.

 

I commit myself to expose how within our current society and the ‘need’ for us to ‘define who/ what we are’ is in fact reinforcing the evil nature that seeks to have its place of consumption, satisfaction and opposition wherein we become just these lighting bolts that seek to be excited at all times in order to move while constantly wanting to get away from the negative experience and remain in a state of perfect bliss, which can only exist if energy exists – and energy is the very abuse of the physical substance as life that we have used and consumed in the name of our personal ‘power’ and satisfaction.

 

I commit myself to stop the need to be constantly defining myself as an experience and instead, embrace silence as I walk here as breath wherein every pattern of self-deprecation as an energetic experience – whether positive or negative – is understood, seen and realized as a self-abusive pattern as I now see, realize and understand how all the experiences that had no ‘explanation’ before are now becoming clear as a result of us having become the manifested consequence of our abdication toward life/ as life, which perpetuated the ‘who I am’ as that experience of separation which is then what leads to a constant seeking of experience in order to ‘feel alive’ or ‘be someone’ which is only seeking to define ‘who we are’ as that very relationship of separation which must stop here, as I realize that I am perfectly able to exist without using the mind as a constant energetic input onto the physical reality that I am able to move in, walk, breath, eat and experience as an actual moment to moment – instead of future projecting, or remembering or seeking to ‘feel something’ in order to ‘feel alive.’

 

I commit myself to show, how – we have become servants to the Devil/Energy-Authority for ourselves to only WITHIN ourselves manifest our Authority/Godhood unto ourselves, where our existence had become completely internalized and automated within ourselves as Mind/Consciousness – only existing to survive and possess ourselves as Energy; with no substantial living action visible to bring about a change of ourselves within and without.

In this – I commit myself, to through writing, self-forgiveness and self-corrective application, speaking and sharing – walk the Visible Action of The Decision to no more accept and allow myself to Serve the Devil/Energy-Authority within and as the Cause/Acceptance of accepting separation, and Effect/Allowance of allowing the relationship between the negative, neutral and positive energies of Mind; but align myself into and as equality and oneness with and as the human physical-body, to stand with and as Life-Authority of and as equality and oneness as what is/will be best for All, as my process of taking directive-principle as responsibility for who, how and what I am in every moment of Breath, and so no more exist in and as the automation of Consciousness that has become the authority over and of me, the physical-body and this physical-existence, but in fact walk in and as Awareness, here in every moment of Breath.” Sunette Spies*

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I commit myself to continue exposing our ‘real nature’ as evil in order to finally take off the veil of energy that we have abdicated our self-directive power to, and become a being that is willing to walk the necessary time and space to reintegrate myself as the physicality of oneness and equality as Life, as that which I separated myself from in the pursuit of happiness, the pursuit of ‘me as an experience’ as energy, of which now I see, realize and understand has been the very key point of ultimate enslavement that must be stopped with the implementation of the Equal Money System wherein real Neighborism is able to emerge as a new human nature, once that we have all realized that we can only thrive in equality as a group, as collective that is able to decide what’s best for all to live by and simply apply it/ be it/ become it.

 

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Read our blogs at Journey to Life 

No Angels, No Devils – Only Physicality as who I really am.

 

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2012 Sculpting in Time: Patience

 

Redefining self-creation within using the term ‘sculpting’ is suitable here within the understanding that we cannot in fact ‘create’ something anew, as everything is already here – we can stand one and equal to what is already Here as ourselves, and form/ shape/ mold ourselves within a self-directive process within the realization and recognition of who I am as one and equal as this totality and reality that is Here.

 

I can use the word manipulation wherein I re-define it as the ability to practically and physically stand one and equal as myself, my physical body to practically align myself within the consideration that, to create/ mold/ shape a world that’s in fact best for all, I must first consider aligning and correcting my own starting point within my existence here. Manos = hands in Spanish so that makes sense to consider the physical-process ‘at hand’ in a tangible way wherein we ‘intervene’ ourselves as the pattern/ shape that we have become. This implies the process that we walk wherein our mind is a direct reflection of the essence of who we are as what we have accepted and allowed ourselves to become in separation of life.

 

What is Life? I have only lived according to that limited reflection of self as a mind that works according to preordained patterns and habits, fears and limitations that have kept me bound to a particular mind-frame, that I created for myself. Thus, self-creation, self-sculpting to stand one and equal as who I really am implies taking definitive steps to correct myself to become the actual and full expression of life. This is thus a point wherein self as creator cannot take a ‘self-mastery’ position until self has actually walked and realized in totality what I created as myself, why and how I allowed myself to live in a limited scope dictated by my own choice to live only as a mind that thinks itself, living in a custom-made pursuit of happiness which, doesn’t matter how much I denied it or created it in opposition of the ‘usual’ pursuit of happiness, became the driving force of my life, neglecting the fact that I don’t have anything to ‘win’ or ‘attain’ or ‘achieve’ here other than self-equalization wherein all value-schemes are finally dissolved to remain as the physical reality that has always been Here, that doesn’t require me to ‘think it’ to exist.

 

This is a Process – and it is walked through space and time. This is me equalizing myself as the physical reality that I realize I exist as in space and time. Within this , I see and realize that I have existed as a perpetual pattern of rushing, of self-righteous positioning within the context of wanting to and desiring to always be in control of myself, to be ahead of my own standards which manifests as a rushing within my being, my thoughts, my actions, my very walking in this world.

 

I could call this an anxiety to ‘get somewhere’ – but even when realizing that there is nothing to attain, but only to Self-Realize as Self one and equal here, I continue perceiving a rush existing as an ingrained aspect of myself, physically and mentally lived within every action, every impulse, every moment that I miss breathing myself here, and allow myself to give into thoughts as that energetic relationship that I have created toward my own personality. I defended it because of seeing it as a ‘positive attitude’ defined within the context of this world system as ‘efficiency’ and ‘accuracy,’ which I will walk within this process of me allowing myself to establish the necessary practical and physical platform to establish patience as the consideration of the physical space and time within this process of self realization.

 

Patience sounds like ‘pace’ – I have defined physical pace as the point of self-direction in every moment that I allow myself to breathe, here, stable, constant and consistently wherein space and time is considered, wherein I am no longer existing as the rush of the mind, trying to perpetuate an idea of having to ‘do everything as fast as possible’ and recharging the self-belief and self-definition of competing against time, against myself, against others within the perception that I must always be on the top of the spear.

 

Patience is then allowing myself to equalize myself as the physical, as breath wherein I stop any rush of the mind to ‘get things done’ in separation of the moment that I am here, practically and physically doing it, directing myself within it/ as it- instead of projecting/ ejecting myself as a lightning bolt into the future wherein I ‘win’ and I then add it to the self-kept score of lifetime achievements.

 

Who I am is not an accumulation of points that can make me ‘more’ that what I am here. I am the accumulation of the thoughts, words and deeds that I correct, self forgive and direct within establishing a certain outcome that is best for all. I allow myself to walk in the moment, as there is nowhere to ‘get to’ or nothing to ‘attain’/ gain here – it is the reintegration of myself as the physical moment and stopping the energetic rush that comes as a spear ahead of me, charged with anxiety and a self-created chasing-after survival mode as my own mind, doing everything ‘the quickest possible way’ which is how I would tend to take short cuts and eventually having to go back and walk the ‘long run’ so to speak.

 

Hence the process here is to get ourselves back to ourselves to stand one and equal with no dimensional shifts of delusions like ‘having to be there’ and ‘attaining’ something, but walking self-equality and oneness within the ability to stand one and equal as the points that I see are supportive for me to accept and live within the consideration of self-creation in every moment that I live Patience as physically breathing and walking every moment here, remaining within the consideration of space and time reality to live the process of self-correction in every moment as breath, as the physical – instead of projecting it as an idea in my own mind that ‘must be done’ but simply live it.

 

How to walk this? Through practically writing out myself and Self-Forgiving the relationship I built with the idea of ‘who I must be,’ which cannot be sustained and doesn’t have-to either, as it was never built within the consideration of what’s best for all, but wrought within the desire to always be ‘on top’ and ‘winning’ and remaining as a ‘special person’ according to my own value-schemes, reinforced and self-induced by my own thoughts and judgments toward myself, others and this reality.

 

So I take these points and walk the correction to stop participating in these energetic movements of the mind, and direct myself within the understanding that this process, which is self-equalization as life here, is and will be walked within space and time. A literal slowing down to consider space and time is then the practical application to stop the automated impulse that comes up – sometimes without even ‘words’ per se – as a physically integrated aspect of myself as a energetic movement of the mind, which is what we can call personality/ ego.

 

“…whether passive or active the point is to assert ones ego as superior as winner in the end. Each has the same end goal – Domination.” Andrew Gable

 

And it is true – even if I have criticized/ judged people that have run a competition against themselves, I have done the exact same thing without wanting to allow it because of ego. And this competition was built upon my own ‘ideal’ of who I am and what I have to portray myself as at all times to remain within the same idea/ personality I built for myself in the first place. In the end it became this ‘eternal cycle’ of battling against myself – it’s always about ourselves. I mean, part of the jaw-dropping points I’ve learned in the past weeks through the what is sex interviews is that all relationships have always been toward our own mind and within understanding all the details that come with it, I realized how we have all been living as mirrors of each other, yet always missed then the point of ‘taking it back to self.’

This is how when encountering people in our reality with similar traits, quirks and personality, we develop a relationship toward ‘them’ in our own mind which is only ourselves using another as a trigger point/ cause and excuse to reinforce our self-accepted patterns and habits as our personality wherein we believe that whatever we experience is about ‘them,’ never realizing it’s always been about ourselves living in a mirror-mirror reality that we are now aware of, must stop with and within ourselves here.

Till this day, I can see that it is an actual ‘abnormal human effort’ to develop such practical common sense within us. It really does – and it is a process walked in space-time as part of the ‘gist’ of it is walking through space and time within the consideration of every thread that we accepted and allowed to separate ourselves from.

At times, I have to take a moment to just breathe and let go, because of realizing to what extent we have separated ourselves from the simplicity that we actually are, here, physically and how we could have stopped all this avalanche of consequence if we had all heard to that inner self-honest voice of doing what’s best for all, considering each other as equals wherein no winners or losers can exist.

However what’s done is done, and it’s here for us to walk, assisting and supporting ourselves to ensure that all separation begins and ends within each one of us here.

This will continue.

 

Self Forgiveness:

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to want to manipulate myself and using myself and what I exist as to suit a self-interest based personality of wanting to always be accomplishing, winning, being and remaining on top, which is how I realize I have used my mind in order to orchestrate and lay out strategies wherein I could be always in a ‘safe spot’ within the self-definition of being ‘unique’ and ‘special’ –

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use myself, my physical body and my mind in order to continue fueling an idea of ‘having to become something more’ which lead me to continually chase-after anything that could allow me to continue residing within the ‘safe spot’ of being on top, ahead of others and of myself as a dimensional separation from the physical reality that is here.

I realize that I created a delusional reality of having to ‘upkeep’ the idea of myself, without ever realizing that any personality-feed that I created for myself, was in fact only existent in my own mind, externalized as ‘who I am’ to the eyes of others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within a constant pattern of rushing within the self-righteous idea of wanting and desiring to be ‘ahead’ of myself and others, within existing as a constant projection of ‘having everything done quickly’ which has manifested as my physical self-experience wherein rushing at a mind level ensues a level of anxiety wherein there is a perceived idea of ‘getting something done’ in separation of myself

I realize that I am able and capable of moving myself at the physical pace, slowing down from my current application wherein breath becomes the pace to establish patience within the process of self correction that is here, as myself, when I realize that I am able to live the words that I place as a platform and blueprint of self-sculpting/ self-creation through space and time.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define efficiency and accuracy as fast-speeding and hurrying/ rushing to get things done throughout my life. This is how I allowed myself to live only at a mind-level of pursuing to ‘accomplish tasks’ to continue adding points to my personal-score.

I realize that all mind-projections and energetic-ejections of rushing and hasting was only to upkeep this idea of myself that I see has been one of the prominent dimensional shifts from the physical reality that is here, as every breath, that must be walked in self-awareness in every moment to ensure that I stop following any lightning bolt thought of wanting to do things ‘as fast as possible’ which only leads me to miss out the actual process of self-realization As the moment that is here as breath.

I see and realize that life is not about ‘becoming something/ someone’ or ‘achieving’ anything – or keeping up a certain idea of ‘who I am,’ it is about actual living and understanding of self-creation as the decision and direction of how I can practically walk myself at a physical level, within the consideration of what is best for all. Within this point of self-honesty I realize that no more, no less, no behind and no ahead can exist, as all dimensions of past, present and future exist here, as myself, as the physical moment of breathing.

Walking at the physical pace is nor slow or fast, it is the pace that is walked as the consideration of space and time, as the reality that we are and create in every moment of breath.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to miss breathing myself here every time that I access the self-created pattern of ‘having to rush’ whenever I have to accomplish a particular task, and defending it as a ‘positive trait’ within me as ‘efficiency’ and ‘accuracy’

I realize that I adopted this patterns within the belief that I could then become like the ‘ideal’ that I perceived others in my reality to be-like, never realizing that I copied the ‘most effective’ survival mechanism in order to prevail as the ‘constantly winning’ personality that I fed as myself.

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself for having considered being ‘fast’ and ‘accurate’ as a positive trait within myself, because of how I would get rewarded and awarded for doing things as ‘fast as I could’ – thus building this idea that there is always something to ‘achieve’, some ‘score to brake’ within myself, not realizing that all that I fed was the idea, belief and perception I created of myself as ‘the ever-conquering winner’ toward others.

And it’s fascinating because I see and realize that this became ‘so much who I am’ that I continued existing as this, which is a surreptitious and prevailing superiority toward others.

Therefore I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to neglect the underlying self-belief of superiority toward others in my world within the belief that such ‘superiority’ is ‘who I am’ and that I am now ‘diminishing myself’ by having to walk at a ‘slower pace’ – which is only a perceptual consideration and mechanism of my own mind to defend the regular desire to intake as much ‘rush’ as possible to ‘upkeep’ the idea of myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to always see this trait of being ‘fast’ and ‘accurate’ within a positive scope, which veiled it from me walking it through self-forgiveness in fear of actually losing that idea of myself, which became a pillar to the entire personality based on superiority and inferiority of and as my own mind toward myself and others.

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to recharge the self-belief and self-definition of having to be constantly ‘competing against time’ without realizing that I was only competing against myself and in doing that, keeping myself busy as the mind, directing me only from that energetic drive and impulse within the starting point of rushing, instead of realizing that whatever I do, say and think must be a self-directed action in every moment that I am living and existing at the physical pace wherein I become the directive principle of my words, thoughts and actions, in self-awareness of each moment being the moment of self-correction to live patience as myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I ‘must’ always remain ‘at the top of the spear’ wherein there is an energetic input in order to make the spear move, as that energetic drive within ‘rushing’ that I see and realize is an energetic charge that I am able to stop in every moment of breath wherein I allow myself to take the necessary time and space to walk the point breath-by-breath, moment-by-moment.

I realize that self-creation is not a matter of producing ‘products’ that I can get a certain ‘reward’ from – it is about self-understanding who I am, what I have become and walking the actual corrections in space and time, which can only then be seen and proven as I walk within space and time, wherein what I have in every moment is the ability to direct and correct myself to make sure the starting point of everything I do, say, think is based in the moment, and not acting out of an accumulation of backchat as self-talk to continue existing as the personality and ego of the mind within ‘rushing’ and competing against time.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself for having used time as my ‘enemy’ and my excuse and an ally when it came to being a constant factor within the self-definition as ‘rushing’ within my life experience.

I realize that I have been the only obstacle and ‘fuel’ to drive myself as this constant rushing-experience within me. I also realize that I have claimed to ‘not have enough time’ without realizing that within rushing I am in fact missing the moment that is here wherein no time is required to be considered, but only self-movement breath-by-breath and moment-by-moment wherein the accumulation of such moments as breath directed toward a specific outcome, will inevitably lead to the certainty of that outcome as I have then placed myself in full-awareness within this self-directed process of self-creation – it is no longer a mind-creation and ‘idea’ of myself getting somewhere/ becoming something. It is myself here walking As that self-realization in space and time, as breath, as the moment, here.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself for having sought to take ‘short cuts’ to ‘get it all done as fast as possible’ which means that I am in fact not living self-correction as the moment, but creating an idea of getting myself ‘somewhere else,’ instead of realizing that short-cutting myself is only a mind-loop that will inevitably have to be walked within space and time as that’s the only point of self-creation that exist in this physical reality.

I realize that I have lived as the ‘quantum version’ of myself, as that idea of myself ‘getting somewhere’ and ‘becoming something’ within no-time, which is neglecting the very physical and actual reality that is here. Thus I realize that the only way to establish self equality and oneness is living here as the physical pace of breath, as the moment wherein I assess what is required to be done and live it As the moment – not to ‘get it done’ but live it as myself moment by moment until it is actually done in space-and-time as the physical reality that I then live as ‘who I am’ not as an idea that I have created of ‘who I am.’

That’s how ‘self-definition’ dissolves when the integration through space and time is no longer an energetic addiction or subtraction of points within an ego/ personality construction, but a self-equalization that is lived as ‘who I am’ as the physical reality – it is no longer bound or defined as a mind-reality, but lived as self in every moment wherein there are no longer any ‘scores’ to keep.

I realize that self-equality and oneness is a physical integration of myself out of the mind and into the physical through living the words that I have laid out here for me to consider in every moment that I am here, wherein when and as I see myself wanting to ‘rush’ and ‘speed up’ my pace and general activities within my reality, I stop and I breathe. I realize that walking patience as myself is the consideration of me walking within space and time as the actual integration of self-correction lived breath-by-breath and moment-by-moment wherein there is ‘nowhere to get to’ other than Here, grounding myself as the physical body that is self-directive within every thought and every breath. This is the space-time process to walk as self, here.

 

“Just slow down and breathe before you write and look at your words through the eyes of life and through the eyes of others and LIVE them to life, regardless – and with that you will lift yourself to life. It is in the service as the written word that we design ourselves as life. You are ready to grasp this. Breathe and accept it.” Bernard Poolman

 

“Moment M-o-(me)nt – Moment is the manifestation/physical living of Me (M) and how I decide/direct as live (nt) this Me practically in this world/reality, as a constant/consistent expression/standing/living (o) of ‘who I am’ (me), with me, the manifestation of me (the physical) and the living of me being an infactness that stand eternal because this Me is ALL, in/as equality and oneness and thus the Moment is Me, HERE– is the hereness of me as I am Moment, which is the very physical lived expression of equality and oneness always. Moment is HERE. Moment is always HERE as I am always Here – and therefore, self-realisation, the opportunity of rebirth to self-awareness is always HERE, open, waiting – in every moment of breath…” Sunette Spies

 

I occupy the space that I breathe in

 

Interview that allowed me to realize this:

Reptilians – The Quantum Time Illusion – Part 11

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