Category Archives: teenage loathe

598. Opening up with Parents

 

Or sharing bits of my teenage years and how my relationship with my parents has evolved throughout the years of walking this process with Desteni.

I listened to these two Eqafe audio recordings today Children and Isolation – Perfecting the Human Race – Parenting – Part 79 and Parent and Child Communication – Perfecting the Human Race – Parenting – Part 80 and they made me remember a bit of ‘who I was’ as a teenager in relation to my parents and how uncomfortable that phase in my life was where I essentially would keep my communication at a minimal point because of fearing having my parents prohibiting me to go out with certain people, etc. and because of knowing the ways that my sister’s teenage years had been truncated in certain ways by a mostly fearful mother, which is kind of interesting looking back at how she was back then and how she’s changed over the years too, which has enabled me to develop a supportive relationship with her now, but she definitely had to walk her own process in her own way and I’ve done mine, which enabled us to create a good communication nowadays, but it wasn’t always like that.

As a teenager I definitely was the loner kind that didn’t want to go out and do what ‘most people would do’ and instead would prefer being alone in my room – where I had all I needed: my cd’s, my paintings, my vhs cassettes with all my favorite music videos, my books and notebooks for writing – that’s all that I needed ah and my computer later on as well. I did notice that  my parents would be a bit worried that I would never go out on a Friday night like my sisters would do, and in essence they would be comparing how my sisters were very social at my age and I just wasn’t doing that at all, so it’s kind of understandable that they were a bit ‘puzzled’ about it but it was just the beginning of a series of ‘puzzling’ situations I definitely put them though and that I definitely recognize they did accept me and embrace me the best way they could through all my various life phases and somewhat ‘extreme’ changes I went through in my life.

When it came to being a ‘loner’ in my house up to the age of 16, in a way I was in fact craving to connect with people, I really wanted to find a friend or someone I could connect with in terms of tastes and things we could share and enjoy together, so that phase became the time when I started to develop ‘who I am’ in relation to all these things I would soak in from literature, music, artists etc. I was developing my tastes, I was finding my way in terms of how I decide to see life, to view things which I also was able to shape first through books and then through finding people that had similar views to my own, which became the friends that I’d spend most of my time with from age 16 and on until around 21.

Back when I was living with my parents as a teenage and already going out with friends, there were days where all my communication with my parents was ‘I’m leaving home, I’m home again, yes I’ll be careful’ and that was it. I deliberately decided to not do what my sisters did, who would sit around my mother’s room telling all of these stories about their friends and their experiences, I just decided I would not do that because of fearing that my mother would criticize my relationships, my friends and not enable me to explore all the things I wanted to do. This fear of being ‘prohibited’ to do certain things emerged when I started going out more with particular people they didn’t approve of and so that’s how I then made a decision to never tell them anything about my life, which was of course not cool for me at all. It was a constant source of stress, anxiety, fear and worry because ‘what if they would find out about this/that relationship or situation I was in?’ and so, if anything for any parent or future parent reading this: instilling fear is definitely not the way, creating a prohibition is not the way and it’s even worse if it comes within an explosive argument like the ones that I had with them which included threats of sorts which of course, led me to then become the self-proclaimed ‘rebel’ in my own family pattern.

I visited one of my childhood/pre-teen years best friend and her family not long ago, and it was interesting to hear how they remembered how my parents were reacting to ‘my ways’ and how I ‘broke the pattern’ that my sisters had set up in the family, and my friend’s mother explained that she recalled how my mother was very worried about me like ‘could not make sense of me’ lol – and the interesting thing is that I would notice such worry about them whenever they would see me just lying in my couch reading books, listening to music, writing or painting… but they would not say a thing, they never really opened up other than asking ‘if I had any friends?’ and ‘why I didn’t like going out as much?’ and my responses were how everything that everyone was doing was very superficial/shallow or plain stupid at the time and I just don’t like to ‘follow’ like that.

In a way it was cool that I also had that period for myself and that if they didn’t know how to ‘deal with it they did let me be in my own ways. Sure I was at the same time generally sad or depressed because I could not ‘connect’ with anyone in school the way that I had wanted to ‘connect,’ which is through opening up what I would define as interesting conversations, and even though I could usually talk to most people, it would all be superficial talk or ‘peer to peer’ talk but there wasn’t anyone I could dive into the depths of what I was experiencing until I found one person in my school that was into that kind of stuff and so we became best friends and that’s where ‘the world opened up to me’ to a bunch of other relationships and things to test out, live out in a more or less comfortable environment, which of course wasn’t at all a super healthy relationship overall – but I also embrace it now as part of that time in my life that led me to get to know more about people my age and the usual troubles of that time etc.

Of course at my parent’s eyes, this friend of mine was a very polite and well educated in terms of meeting his family etc. and me spending most of my days in his house, so they never questioned that. Only I knew more about the actual truth of what was going on behind the façade, which was quite an interesting relationship for me to have, however it was only later on when ‘shit hit the fan’ that I had to explain to my parents how troubled this friend in fact was and how I had tried to help and how we had to eventually part ways.

So the whole point I want to share here is how because of fear that I got from my parents as a response to my seemingly ‘abnormal ways’ of growing up as a teenager, they didn’t know how to handle it and for the most part I wasn’t going to open up because there wasn’t such development of trust with them, especially with my mother whom I had seen having long and deep talks with my sisters but I never did that or create the space it, and maybe it was for the best considering the things I was into at the time that would have shocked her even more than her already existent constant worry about me and my life choices.

However, at some level they were also certain about having provided certain principles and they knew how responsible I generally was, so, that’s how they actually allowed me to have much more freedom than my older two sisters had, which they still kind of get jealous of – lol – like allowing me to go and live to another city and be the first one to ‘leave the nest,’ or travel on my own at a relatively young age, stuff like that which I’m also grateful for that they did have such trust towards me to do all those things, but I also was a generally responsible person so I sort of ‘earned’ it in a way as well.

In terms of parents having children stepping into their teenage years, I can only suggest to not be judgmental about what they’re going through, sometimes to not even try and understand it completely but rather consider how it was ‘for you’ when going through that phase and how being alone to me was a way to find my way through it – though of course some people will actually benefit from communications so I guess it all has to do with having developed such communication with your kids at a young age so that there’s no ‘awkward’ sudden interest in talking to the children when they start reaching their teenage years.

I also have a small context of how current generations are in terms of kids and their parents. There was a general failure in the internet service in Mexico yesterday and a lot of what I read in twitter was how what I consider were kids or teenagers were suddenly placed in a position of having to get out of their rooms and interact with ‘these old dudes that say are their parents’ which I found interesting, meaning, there is really no interaction at all now with kids doing their thing in the internet. But, who am I kidding? I did the same and would spend hours in the computer when I first got internet and would do the same without computer and be stuck in front of my TV to avoid family time, lol, so it is a phase indeed that can be changed based on supportive communication patterns that can be cultivated from the very first years of a child’s life.

Teenage years are indeed a phase where a lot of things get shaped within our personalities, tastes, preferences – and even if the initial ‘shape’ things are taken is not the best way, it is mostly when one gets into the 20’s that one can actually learn from what one did around that teenage phase and realign our path. This means that maybe for parents it becomes difficult to be able to connect with their children during those first teen years, but once they get into young adulthood, it might get easier.

To me starting this process having 21 years old assisted me tremendously to get back to communicate with my parents in a different way, from a different starting point, deliberately no longer seeing them as ‘my parents’ but starting to see them as people. I did decide to even stop calling them ‘mother’ and ‘father’ and call them by their name till today – which I did ended up doing in a somewhat stubborn manner which caused more reactions in them than any form of support, so I would not suggest anyone doing that because the point is to be open to them as people, no longer as these ‘guardians’ that we have to ‘check in with’ or that we only relate to for the basics of survivalism. So I decided to explain how I wanted to see them, how I want to relate to them as people and no longer as these ‘parental figures’ that I fear or have no comfort to talk to.

And this wasn’t an easy process – my mother had to walk her own process to understand how much of a control freak she was – and she now recognizes it, which is great – and my father has always been quite ok with me doing my thing and being more independent, because he lived his life like that by leaving his home when he was 13 so, nothing’s too shocking for him. So here more in relation to my mother and how it was very supportive for me to start sharing what I am doing in this process which of course at first she didn’t fully understand, she was in shock lol, especially because I went full-blown extremist within it at first. But as time progressed and she started witnessing many of the ‘evolutions’ within me, she’s now at that stage where she asks my perspective for certain things she’s facing with my sisters, the grandchildren, her friends, herself a bit as well and that’s quite cool, to the point where her friends by default appreciate me quite a bit because they always say how my mother goes ‘like Marlen says…’ and shares back what I’ve shared with her about my own realizations and points walked or what I’ve learned through the education at Eqafe and Desteni, my relationships with people etc. which is great really.

But it all wasn’t built in ‘one day’ so to speak, it’s taken almost a decade to get to that point but it is possible to do that even if I had a very sour relationship with my mother back then. 10 years ago I truly thought that I wasn’t ever going to have a ‘healthy communication’ with my mother specifically and that I was going to ‘forever have a grudge towards her’ for certain emotional outbursts that we did have toward each other during my ‘teenage  years’  – while also considering she was going through menopause so, not a good mix lol – and only later on me taking responsibility to place myself in her shoes, understand all the variables of that time and so not take the things said and done personally, but understand her fears and also being honest with myself in how my choice of relationships weren’t also the ‘healthiest’ ones either, which is kind of common at the time as well – we all make mistakes and eventually learn from it, walked my way through it regardless.

Surely at times I did rely on going to the school’s psychologist to ask for a perspective, because I knew I could not talk to my friends about things because ‘they were ‘the point’ of worry/problem in my life’ nor could I go with my parents to talk about it because they would get shit scared about what I was going through and didn’t have any other people around me to open up, so I did go to her and she made me realize one thing that, man,  yep I could have applied for the rest of my life but until not so long ago I was still playing out this pattern as ‘who I am,’ which is how I tried to save people from themselves instead of focusing on myself. I’ll never forget how she said ‘well who’s coming for help? Is it really about them or is it really you that needs help, because you are the one that’s here, not them’ and that clicked quite a lot within me to see that I was the troubled one in fact, not them. But even if I got that realization, it took me over ten years to fully understand what that meant, which means I repeated the same pattern every single time until I saw the consequence it creates and decided to for once and for all say ‘no more.’ But that’s something I’ve already shared a few months ago.

Currently I enjoy going out with my parents and sharing what I’ve discovered about myself, my relationships, what I’ve learned from others, how I see ‘the world’ in general and what I’ve gotten through walking this process with Desteni and educating myself with Eqafe material. It’s become an awesome way for me to connect with them because I’ve now been able to apply that realization that I can ‘connect’ with people because we are all human beings, we all have that one thing in common and so I can share and open up things and ask them questions. I’ve gotten to know a lot more about them as people, the hardship they went through in their own ways while growing up, their family set ups, their environment and relationship with their siblings and parents, their decisions and how that defined their lives etc.

To me that’s been quite cool because it is through that that I’ve been able to see how I came to be ‘who I am’ based on who they both have been in their lives. I also enjoy looking at them as my ‘mirrors’ because of course I am directly coming from them and so I see them in a way as ‘cautionary tales’ for me to look at what patterns they have developed that have become a source of ‘problems’ in their lives, from anger, anxiety and stress issues to control-freakism and general patterns of fear and prejudice that I can see in them that I can then ‘take back to self’ to ensure I am not following ‘the same steps,’ because I can see how things turn out with time and with having an advanced age. Though this is done not in a judgmental way, but through understanding in how it’s now up to me to learn from them and stop repeating the same mistakes they’ve made, which is a general supportive thing to do with our progenitors, to identify their weaknesses and turn them into our strengths and use what we have gotten from them as ‘strengths’ or things we’re good at and develop them even more.

 And the truth is that I would not be able to be doing what I’m doing and who I’ve become without the support of my parents. They both have been very supportive with everything I am doing, they fully support this process and my work in it – even if it was kind of rough for them to understand it at first – and it’s also great to have that confidence and trust to have them meet my friends/partners which I had not done at all throughout my teenage years, they only met my first ‘official partner’ when I was 28 years old, lol.

So this goes to show that I did have quite a distance-relationship to my parents in that sense, but it also was linked to me not having made the kind of ‘supportive choices’ in my life before that I would be confident enough to share with my parents, so it took me quite some time for sure, but I’m quite glad that they understood my process and that I found my way through it all, while also having worked quite extensively on my own to not hold a grudge to them at the time for the impositions they created on my life, but understand where they were ‘coming from’ and also being able to be honest about myself and seeing how if I had been in their shoes, I would have probably freaked out as well with the things I was deciding to do, but I’m here and able to tell J

I’ll open up in another blog about how this ‘openness’ relates to current relationships and the benefits that come along with it, which of course is also an outflow or result of having walked this process with Desteni.

Thanks for reading.

 

Marlenoise_1

Self Portrait circa 2005

 

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423. Proof that I’ve been Mind Controlled

 

Following through a bit with this ‘happiness’ redefinition, I would not have been able to be comfortable in opening up this word to redefine if I hadn’t looked at a key aspect that I’ve been noticing for quite some time in walking this process of removing/stopping past self-definitions.

This became clearer when I shared in a podcast I called Doing Good = Uncool? about how currently there is a tendency to deem everything that is rebellious and antagonistic as ‘cool’ and everything that is supportive, disciplined and orderly as ‘uncool’ – and the way I found out that this mostly was a personal perception is when I attempted to find pictures on Google images that would depict this type of construct or judgments upon what I had seen as ‘cool’ and ‘uncool,’ there were no pictures for me to depict that! So that made it obvious that I had to rather look at it from a very personal manner instead and ended up creating my own ‘picture’ to depict the kind of perception I had held within me.

 

Cool vs uncool

 

My previous attempt in life was to become what I defined and believed to be a ‘cool’ person, so just because I had gotten so much bashing/criticism from my peers while growing up for always being ‘the straight A’ person in school and so being defined as nerdy for that and ‘tight’ or ‘uncool,’ I focused on finding ways to shake those definitions off by being very specific in the type of ‘person/personality’ I would become. This is how I decided to pick and integrate aspects that I could deem were going ‘against the grain,’ so to speak, against the expectations that I perceived everyone had around me. This influenced everything of me, the way I would dress/look, act, speak, the topics I would bring up, the kind of books I read, the kind of music I’d listen to, the way I would relate to people, to my family etc.  And TV was a great source of ‘inspiration’/dormant brainwashing for that, as I have shared here previously that I mostly grew up watching MTV and so there I shaped all my preferences toward everything and everyone that seemed to ‘challenge’ the status quo, to go against the flow and step out of the ‘schemes’ in one way or another, or be intimidating toward others, as a way to ‘challenge the establishment’ or being in a constant ‘defense mode,’ which is a ‘trendy’ way to actually hide the fear that instigates these ‘hardass’ personalities.

Little did I know that this was part of a greater scheme of social engineering to have kids grow up aspiring to be ‘rockstars’ or ‘artists’ and had nothing to do or no sense of responsibility to this world, but instead define all things ‘rebellious’ and ‘antagonistic to the system’ as being super cool.

So, this is how I then became what I could define as a disciplined rebel, because it’s not like I started slacking at school, I actually proved that I could still ‘pull out a straight A’ without even studying at times, just by being very attentive in class and so using my ‘wits’ to challenge professors and classmates alike – lol, I was really in for being like a typical dissident in many ways and deem that as cool, even if for others it wasn’t, to ‘me’ that was the definition of ‘being an outcast’ and enjoying myself within that because of seeing myself as ‘special,’ as having ‘no trend’ without realizing it was a trend and it was becoming more and more common in order to get people reacting, being angry and antagonistic against everything and everyone, just to remain in perpetual conflict and never looking at solutions.

Of course nowadays doing this type of ‘dissidence’ has become like the norm and it’s no longer as ‘shocking’ as it was some 10 years ago, which is how I’ve seen a fascinating shift in the perception of ‘values’ and the role that the media/TV has had on twisting people’s ideas of ‘what they want to do with their lives’ and what they find as ‘cool’ or ‘uncool’ by imposing a ‘new’ morality that claims openness, sexual liberation and ‘independence’ but it’s all just a false idea of empowerment through antagonism – been there, done that, doesn’t work!

So this is why I then saw that everything I deemed as ‘uncool’ was in fact that which was in fact supportive: to be self-responsible, to be disciplined, to be non-antagonistic, to have a ‘clean’ presentation of oneself, to not be destructive, to not bash or blame others, etc. This included a very key aspect that had prevented me from realizing I could live the word ‘happiness’ in fact, because I had associated happiness with people being fully blind and not seeing reality, I deemed it as a dirty word that could only be used to define an ever elusive utopia that we were too far away from or impossible of ever creating even. I deemed that anyone that could call themselves ‘happy’ were absolutely disingenuous and blinded from reality. So it is in this judgment that I then prevented me from even considering looking at this word ‘happiness’ for myself, meaning investigating ‘who I was’ toward this world, how I could live it in a self-honest manner; I was in a way still holding on to the ‘image’ or ‘idea’ of myself as still ‘challenging the system’ and being cool in that, but in no way wanting to get to what I had defined as ‘being a positive thinker’ of sorts by talking about things like ‘being happy,’ or creating a ‘happy future for everyone’ lol.

 

 

 

All of these are just judgments and perceptions wherein I was in fact denying to myself being able to expand my living into seeing the word happiness and not link it to some nerdy-good-doer type of personality as my own mind construct, as my own past definitions that came through ‘judgments’ that I refused to be or become at others’ eyes. In fact now that I can speak about it and define me in the process of creating happiness within myself and my world, I no longer see something pulling out inside me as a ‘NOOO what the hell are you talking about!!?’ type of reluctant backchat that would come within me whenever anyone talked about ‘being happy’ or aiming at being happy in this world. A part of me really, really rejoiced experiencing and living in misery, gloom and doom which is a whole construct that I’ve been debunking throughout the years in this process, and along with that discovering what I was preventing me from acknowledging as part of my living potential, just because I had defined it as ‘uncool’ lol, and going ‘against my personality.’

What are personalities really but locks and cells wherein we believe we would ‘get out of character’ if we challenge such self-definitions and preferences and dare to think outside of our box – it’s really all a mind job wherein we hold on to ‘past definitions’ of who we are and in that we lock ourselves in one way or another from being able to fully embrace our living potential, which is not at all about being a ‘good person’ now instead of an ‘evil one,’ not at all –  it’s about recognizing words for the expression they are and can be when lived in self-honesty, and no longer about words that hold relationships to pictures, ideas, personalities or preferences as they exist in the world system.

 

In this, I realize that if we are to genuinely become the living word, we have to expunge ourselves from any limitation, any self-delimitation/definition that keeps us locked into a phoney idea of ‘who we are,’ which becomes a constricted character that is still defined by attitudes, behaviors, preferences, personality traits and so forth which are all part of the egos we believe we are. So it’s always a matter of asking oneself: what do I accept and allow to define me and my every moment in this world? What am I still holding on to with preventing me from living this word – such as ‘happiness’- as myself? Why had I defined this word as uncool and a pure sham? What am I missing out when dismissing living a world that is actually able to be lived and constructed in a self-honest manner?

Seems that self-sabotage is the only answer as to why we prevent us from digging out the corpses that prevent us from give ourselves a real blank-slate to create our lives, free from the past, I mean why would I want to hold on to an idea of ‘who I should be’? To be liked by ‘certain kinds of people’ only? Because I wanted to get along and ‘attract’ similar people – but would I then be even ‘attracting’ real and genuine people or only other similar characters that focus on getting along with similar characters in their lives to remain locked in the same characters forevermore?

Time to break the shell of one’s personality in all ways and challenge it further, and to me having to be speaking of solutions, focusing on looking at practical reality outcomes and how I can be a living example of doing this would have been like an ‘uncool’ thing to do in the past, because I was following the bashing/ rebelling trend, lol, not considering that I was really on my way to be a self-defined pariah that wanted to be special and ‘cool’ through abdicating all responsibility to myself and my world, because ‘oh it was ‘so cool’ to only bash the world and do nothing about it.’ ´

My suggestion is to watch out for this kind of thinking construct, even more so when this kind of ‘attitude’ is shaping lots of youngsters mindsets with ‘life mottos’ such as Y.O.L.O You Only Live Once and ‘living life on the fast lane,’ being the most ‘rebel’ and ‘darky’ and ‘antagonistic’ to precisely avoid youngsters genuine awareness of how they can contribute to creating life, a better future for all – and instead remain in an abysmal and gloomy outlook on life, because in that way you get discouraged from ‘doing something about it’ and so, it’s most profitable to seek ‘happiness’ or fulfillment through trends, drugs, partying and sex than doing anything genuinely supportive in one’s life.

And so, this is then a general self-awareness point wherein this ‘live fast, die young , don’t give a fuck about anything or anyone, do drugs, have sex with as many as you can and enjoy the rock and roll’ type of mentality is seen as ‘the ultimate cool’: It is not, and that’s why there’s such a vast amount of disarray and mental/physical problems in young adults that follow this ‘trends’ that actually start from TV, from so called ‘alternative books’ as well as it happened in my case.

 

Here’s an invitation to look at yourself, where is it that you are still a product of social-engineering brainwashing through the media and ‘culture’ in terms of personalities, likes-dislikes, preferences, the ‘type of people’ you’ve perceived yourself to be and all the points that go ‘against your character’ that you have refrained yourself from openly investigating. I would not have been able to get to this conclusion if I hadn’t walked the process of deconstructing ‘me’ as a personality and so link the dots to see why I had a slight reaction to even talk about ‘happiness’ before.

 

Life is not about becoming a character that seeks to be the ultimate cool and ‘rebellious,’ that’s the illusion of freedom SOLD as an EXPERIENCE.

Genuine and real freedom from mind control is to take responsibility for oneself, to actually not allow oneself to be brainwashed into ‘trends’ or following what the masses think is ‘cool’ which at the moment is ‘the masses think being a rebel is cool’ which is then of course not at all an actual ‘threat’ any longer, lol, it never has been! Think of the punk movement as being part of social engineering in Britain to exacerbate youngster’s addictions and dissociation from taking responsibility in their society, because drug addicts and an impaired society is more easy to control than healthy, self-aware and ‘unbrainwashable’ individuals, which is what we have to now focus on being and becoming – mind control is only possible if we accept it and allow it.

So, are you mind controlled?

 

Unhooking Past Definitions

 

Cool blog to read on re-approaching Happiness:

Why I First Resisted The Relationship of Happiness to Money – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 653

 

Oldie:

2012 Destonians Take Over the World: The New Culture of LIFE

 

Read people recognizing their self creation abilities – including the redefinition of happiness – in the 7 Year Journey to Life blogs

The Free Desteni I Process Lite course is a first platform of self-support to learn more about ourselves, our mind and understand how we can practically improve our potentials and skills.


404. Deconstructing Culture as Myself

 

As I continue my self-investigation it seems that realizing the fact that we all have been preprogrammed individuals following a very specific ‘plan’ that involved conditioning ourselves to become a certain role/personality in our minds and never question it,  wasn’t still completely grasped within me when it comes to seeing culture and how it has been specifically designed to support particular agendas that have led to various ‘cultural movements’ that within me I still wanted to believe were attempts of us as human beings trying to ‘break-through’ or ‘break-free’ – lol – but mostly managing to break ourselves further through imprinting certain behaviors, ideas, concepts, morals, ‘world vision’ that became actual distractors in the sense that none of these points would be useful or supportive for a genuine change in this world, but instead it was the patterning and standardization of what we would think, what we would understand as ‘freedom’ and what we would find entertaining or alluring in our lives, which is also containing the ways in which we see/define/categorize and think ourselves and everyone/everything else, which is mind control through the most ‘subtle means’ such as television/media/arts and everything that is usually reached by the average person, even if such person doesn’t go to school for example.

 

All of this was part of the ‘greater plan’ to be perpetually enslaved to our own constant desire to experience, to be ‘hooked on energy’ so to speak which is what we accepted as our every day living, our every day ‘drive’ and motivation to go to work, do the exact same things every day to earn a living and then come home and be able to relax while getting ‘updated’ on ‘what is going on in our minds’ which is what then becomes part of your passive indoctrination into new fascinations, new obsessions, new desires to consume, body types, new personalities, new things to essentially get ourselves occupied with in our minds which became a self-inflicted way to accept and allow ourselves to dive into complacency of how this system operates, since we mostly came to conclude that ‘As long as I can have my free time to do whatever I like doing to relax and entertain myself and those around me are protected ($),  who cares whatever else is going on in the world?’ – we even have gotten to the point of praising our enslavement by idolizing those that we have accepted and allowed as ‘masters’ in our world and gullibly thinking that we can someday reach/rich ‘that top’… without realizing the system is structured to not allow anyone else to get to such positions, but be constantly reminded ‘they can’ if they just hit the jackpot like stars do nowadays with reality shows, singing contests and whatnot. It’s All around us and no matter if kids are homeschooled, kids will still be having a TV, internet, peers that will simply be also the product of all of this so, we have to establish principles in order to direct ourselves within it and so the younger more impressionable minds too.

 

DSC00397

 

In my case I linking what should have been rather obvious to me from the time that I became more ‘acquainted’ with TV at the age of 7, specifically cable TV and American TV Channels. But also from the books that I read throughout my teenage years, I was still holding on to them and the writers as proof of what I believed was an attempt of us to ‘breakthrough’ or ‘step out of the system’ when it comes to human creativity and other creations like music, fine arts, films – all of the ‘marvels’ of the world that I once saw myself being ‘inspired by’ in order to overcome my own inner conflict which was in fact first of all created by everything that I began watching on TV as I had no actual ‘worries’ in my life as such. I can say I am a genuine product of spending childhood watching MTV for example. So, I’ve been finding out how it is that these ‘artists’ were in fact used or let’s place it in a more tangible way: their own creativity was rather used in order to further certain agendas related to ‘pushing the envelope’ when it comes to instilling ‘new’ ideas, personalities, fantasies, personalities, ‘ideologies’ and even addictions within people, all of it paid with what is called fame and fortune wrapped in the package of ‘celebritism’ or artistic personalities or eccentrics that portrayed the apparent ‘perfect ways’ to ‘escape the system’ – to present the illusion of ‘yes, anyone can get to the top!’ or ‘Anyone can beat the system and escape!’  and bam! There I went, right into it as far as I could when I was into aiming at doing/becoming like certain personalities and doing what they did and living their life.

 

Now within this there’s also a point to consider how it is not only some evil cabal’s plan to complete their ‘great work’ and have all these stereotypes, morals, behaviors, ideas being imprinted in everyone’s minds through manufacturing culture and all of us believing that artistic manifestations were evidence of ‘man’s evolution’ – which in essence as such, evolution is just consciousness upgrading itself, which means there’s no real Self-Awareness in it, just new ‘trends’ that could be sold to people in an attempt to fulfill the constant desire to progress, to advance, to ‘become better’ – lol – not realizing we haven’t ‘evolved’ an iota from the moment of our creation, only the scenarios have changed and we have seen our ‘technology’ create the illusion that we have changed, but we haven’t, at all.

 So this is to understand that the history we have been taught in schools of course is taught by the winners, those that have created the wars and have perpetuated the idea of how a god would choose who the monarchs would be, and so forth – all of it which was usually ‘backed’ by the evidence of artistic creations used as another alibi to confirm certain theories of our evolution. But in reality, a lot of it has been transfixed in order to suit certain theories to, once again, advance certain notions of evolution, of real change and human refinement, simply to continue justifying what we have as ‘arts’ today which have mostly become part of the dumbification or downgrading of ourselves as individuals in order to promote carelessness, apathy, destruction, chaos, mental disorders, the destruction of any value or principle but only shock and disturb to such an extent that it becomes a ‘norm’ nowadays in what we call our entertainment, which is really entrainment.

Once we get to know of the actual history – through currently non-institutionalized sources of course – of how our culture has been engineered as a necessary tool of propaganda to back the ‘story’ of ‘how things are/how they have been’ and paving the way to ‘how things will be’ there is no doubt that we are continuing to lock ourselves in these ideals based on what we get/absorb from the media/environment around us, which is nothing else but the same mind patterns made ‘enjoyable’ just like junk food that one can get addicted to: it tastes good, you then crave for it but nevermind really getting to know about the lack of nutritional content.  In essence our culture has become the glorification and legitimization of ‘our human nature’ as ‘who we are as the mind,’ separated from reality into the fictional stories that we could spend our entire lifetime creating of ourselves as personalities, as ‘characters’ in our own ‘movie’ that we actually begun thinking we had to create as ‘our lives’ and ‘our relationships.’ It’s been very interesting to me to see my own brainwashing and how my own relationships, my own thoughts/ideas/fixations were all imprints that I took from music, music videos, books, TV shows and essentially immersing myself in a culture that I wanted to belong to at the time – American Culture – because of loathing ‘my own culture’ which is what I had then perceived as the low-life Mexican Culture and as such never realizing I was actually then going to be my own reference as to ‘who one becomes’ when continually watching American TV, which I did for the most part from age 7 till probably 15-16 or so.

 

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CULTure is the perfect way to entrain ourselves into consciousness, ‘what everyone is thinking about’ and ‘what’s talked about’ which comes in the form of our news, TV shows, movies, music, etc. containing components as behaviors, personalities, thinking patterns, fashion, attitudes, morals, obsessions, addictions, etc. – all of it having ‘profitable’ purposes but goes beyond that and into the necessary role of providing the ‘circus for the masses’ to ensure that this time, the Holy Roman Empire does not fall for not giving enough bread and circus to the people. One only has to have a look around us and see that it’s easier to talk to someone about a TV show than politics or economics; it’s easier to strike a conversation with someone about a movie than it is to discuss our emotionally driven tendencies to buy products as way to compensate for some kind of ‘emotional need.’ Culture has always been the way to perpetuate a mindset, a way to legitimize ‘how life is lived’ and ‘how things are done,’ what is ‘cool’ and what is not, which essentially consolidates our usually used as an excuse to not change ‘human nature’ – culture is its own PR campaign that we are then taught in schools as part of our history and ‘ethics’ so that we are reminded that ‘there’s ALWAYS been someone at the top of the food chain, there’s ALWAYS been slaves that are disempowered, deal with it, try to always aim at the top and enjoy the show while it lasts.’

Currently if one cannot see the actual agendas for further depravity, lack – because they were never ‘lost’ of any living principles and the ‘Do as Thou Wilt’ mentality to give continuation to our ‘age old’ culture, one must be very, very brainwashed – not to worry though, it’s not too late yet. Nowadays sexual depravity is the ‘norm’ when it comes to the idea of ‘sexual liberation’ and female empowerment means stripping down in front of crowds and being praised by millions as some kind of ‘queen.’ Another example is how within our ingrained desire to ‘feel free’ the idea of ‘the rebel’ or the ‘anti-system’ became part of the social engineering process to always contain and control any form of actual break-through within individuals, which is the predictable way of acting if you see that something is ‘not right’ and your are being abused, you then aim and attempt to ‘break free’ from the oppressor by opposing, judging, antagonizing and denying it, revolting against it which are all the ‘anti’ movements that have become part of the systematic and predictable antithesis processes to actually Contain the people within such stance/roles and behaviors for which ‘the system’ as we have all co-created it was always ready to thrown back some ‘solution’/synthesis to further control. It’s just following what Lenin said in the lines of If you want to control the opposition, take the head of it, and you can see that all ‘leaders’ and role models in arts and so-called revolutionary people have been also part of perpetuating the same status quo, even if they were not aware of.

 

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To prove this point in terms of realizing how our culture has not been one that supports life, I bet that you have most likely never seen a movie pointing out how life is not about participating in our own mind as thoughts, emotions or feelings… or becoming self-responsible, or empowering each other to become the actual directors of our lives, of how poverty could be eradicated if we all partake in political solutions – not just one lucky good-doer leader here and there – not at all, instead we create the opposite and as such, it becomes what occupies our mind at a conscious level, it’s what suits our ‘human nature’ which is that of blame, vengeance, victimization…  just look at V for Vendetta that became the brainwashing mechanism for everyone at Occupy Wall street believing they had some kind of ‘power’ to oust ‘the bankers’ while seeking revenge – lol, fascinating how MOVIES are in fact dictating how we even ‘revolt’ nowadays, isn’t it? Not to mention the masks that became part of protests since 2011 and specifically the ‘anonymous movement’ are copyrighted to Time Warner, thank you for your contribution to one of the five top corporations that run the media in this world – wink, wink. How have we accepted and allowed to become SO predictable and SO Brainwashed and still fall for it? Easy, the same culture has become the only ‘soup of thoughts’ we all swim in.

 

 

This is precisely WHY ‘going against the system’ is just becoming the predictable pattern within the foreseeable attempts to ‘break free’ from our minds which is just playing the role of becoming the dark pole to the white counterpart or ‘going in the opposite direction,’ confirming our ‘dialectic’ predictable mentality that was also part of what ‘great philosophers’ left on Earth…  it is really only giving a name to the mechanisms in which we operate in our own minds – no big discovery, only making visible what we already exist as in our polarity mind-constructs of good and bad, right and wrongs, positive and negatives caging ourselves into oblivion within Energy and the illusion of ‘breaking free’ – all of it being the ‘building blocks of the illusion’ that we can call culture formed by the massive distribution and repetition of ideologies, images, sounds = all created in and as the image and likeness of who we are as the mind and its mechanisms, hence the importance of knowing thyself and becoming Aware of what one thinks, what principles one lives by, how we created our personality, what are our goals in life and where did we take those ideals from? Why do we dress a particular way? Why do we like a particular set of movies? Why do we Feel differently toward things, people, places, music …. There are so many theories and attempts to debunk the origin of our culture and all I can remember from it is that as human history it ends up when ‘hitting a wall’ where no man has gone beyond – before 2006 – and attributing everything to god or a creator and as such, for example seeing the origin of art as having some kind of magical-religious purposes…. Oh yes, that means core programming for enslavement within the idea of ‘higher someone’ dictating everything we do and because we could not understand it, we came to draw it or paint it or sculpt it so that it would later on become our way to solidify the same plot of what we have come to accept and allow as ‘how things have always been,’ and even learned how to revere it as well! That is us at the dawn of our species, and that is still us at the time as well. No evolution has taken place whatsoever.

 

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Coming back to my own case here, it’s cool and rather necessary for me to debunk what I see I had wanted to hold on to as some kind of belief in ‘human creativity spark’ or a bit of ‘romanticism’ when It comes to human expression and sure, the works and creations themselves can still be very well done, but it’s definitely not something ‘special’ or as an attempt to ‘break through’ some kind of programming – lol –  it’s rather the opposite. Once one starts seeing and understanding the ‘big picture’ and how these personalities or built-up stars play a role within the whole scheme and get to understand who paid them, for what purpose, within the context of which agenda, any remains of romanticism or ‘out of the box’ hopes upon artists just goes down to the drain as it should, because it was never ‘real’ anyways, it was never intended to honor and support life, so why praising something or someone that I personally only used to confirm my own existence as a mind consciousness system that absorbed all of this knowledge and information to further myself down my own mythological rabbit whole? It’s pointless.

To me this is a bit ‘late’ to realize in my process with such clarity, but better later than ever breaking through yet another ‘layer’ within the experiences, ideals and fascinations held within me as part of ‘my personality’ created in the image and likeness of the illusion; what I mean by ‘illusion’ are my experiences, my own responses toward certain artists, books, films, arts in general which means, how I FEEL and how I would See myself in relation to ‘what is of this world’ and what ‘suit’ I wore most of the time to be in it. I also see that I can apply this same realization to any other point or aspect in reality toward which I had held some ‘special value’ upon and instead see it  within self-awareness for what it physically is,  realizing that there’s no ‘grandeur’ in anything in this reality at the moment that I could genuinely ‘praise,’ because everything that we’ve ever done as humanity and our ‘culture’ specifically has been engineered within the context of our preprogrammed reality, of revering the mind and system that it is in our outside world – but never life which is what I actually ended up doing for myself: I found ‘my place’ in the world in a comfortable cage where – If I had continued down my ‘preprogrammed path’ – I could not at all have affected real change, because arts as I now see, in order to become really ‘famous’ and revered, you cannot genuinely destabilize the status quo, and so all the people I admired and I believed made some advancements really only landed themselves in jails or ended up as drug addicts, alcoholics, committed suicide or fell for the path of fame and glory as it is still apparently ‘too hard to refuse’ when you can sign a pact with the devil to get everything you want and ‘make it’ in this dog-eat-dog world. We have all become preys of our own emotions, feelings, desires and wants, yet we believe that that is the key to a fulfilling life, to ‘get it all’ when it is in fact that way in which we are imprisoning us all at the moment, disregarding the fact that if I take more for me, I am in fact leaving another without any.

This is a lengthy point to me as I chose to and wanted to become part of culture as a creator of it, so I chose to study a career dubbed as ‘creator of culture’ which is arts, visual arts and for the most part I’ve seen how ‘arts’ in general are being used as the circus to entertain, to further decay, to instill new ‘ideologies’ and ideas with which we most likely end up much worse that we already are doing in our overall human decay we’re living in. This too can be changed and I see this IS the point I can certainly do not only for myself, but for anyone else that’s realizing the same propaganda-role that art has taken throughout our known history of it.

 

So, this is not over yet, it’s only just begun. I would actually challenge and/or suggest to you reading this to look at which character either from a film or book, what artist you idolized or ‘wanted to emulate’ for some reason and why, what kind of ideology from a certain movie or series you could ‘identify’ with and decided to make it your own by becoming/acting/speaking/wanting to look like someone you saw on the TV, a film, a book character, an artist, etc. The more and more we start considering the seemingly subtle ways in which our behavior and what we claimed to be ‘our own personality’ has been influenced by the media and entertainment we participate on a constant basis, the more we will be able to realize to what extent we are STILL accepting and allowing the continuation of the problems in this world by realizing that our current culture is not one of self-support and honoring each other as life, as equals – but instead we are using it to perpetuate and upgrade our own alienation from the matters that should have always been part of our culture, which begins with self-awareness of who we are in ourselves as our mind and How we are contributing to the creation or destruction of our reality with the ways we act, speak, think within our lives and toward others.

 

This will continue …

 

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Are you mind controlled? Test yourself here:


392. Why are Emotional Relationships a Fuckup?

Continuing from:

 

“So the disillusionment with arts have to do with My Own expectations about it. How I thought that this was ‘the way’ to change the world and of course I didn’t follow through with ‘becoming an artist’ in the traditional sense which I then perceived as myself already ‘opting out’ of it all and seeing the sheer idea of dedicating myself to ‘create art’ as utterly selfish, without realizing how much I had desired ‘that’ to be my reality before. I’ve also been recently sharing about these points with people, explaining how I’m not proud of the decisions I made earlier on in my life and how I would not recommend anyone to study arts. I do however not say ‘don’t study arts’ but simply place my own expectations, my own experience, my decision to do something else and how such studies were a nice platform but not real tools that I can apply to what I am doing now.” From 387. The Love/Hate Relationship with Art

 

Nostalghia

 

Facing Myself, my Relationships through the Relationship with Art

I suggest to read:  What does it Mean to Have a Relationship with Oneself? – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 608 by Andrew Gable

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define my relationships based on emotions and feelings wherein it doesn’t matter whether it is arts or a person or a responsibility or a place, the moment that I create emotional and feeling attachments to places/people/objects/professions then I begin creating my own trap through definitions based on what I believe that ‘I like’ and what I believe is ‘my thing’ based on nothing else but emotions, feelings, experiences that I went attaching toward something/someone over time, and then believing that I am in fact all of these experiences, emotions and feelings in relation to something or someone, without realizing that such experiences cannot define what such something or someone is in fact, as it is all entirely self-created, it is me-myself that has created this experience within me.

Within this premise, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to immediately automate the words ‘my relationship to/with something/someone’ being defined as an experience that I have built toward something or someone instead of the actuality of how I participate, interact with, communicate with /through something or someone and within that realizing that any experience that I create is entirely my own and has nothing to do with that something or someone but myself at all times.

Therefore I realize that the projections upon ‘art’ is in fact the experience that I have created toward the who I was within that time of my life when I chose to study art and that If I were to place myself within that same frame of mind 7 years ago, I would probably still go for that choice in life, which means that it is a decision I made entirely based on what I wanted to experience and who I wanted to be as a personality, an ego and satisfy my drive that I went building up throughout time to ‘make it’ within the art world – so this point I have opened up before however now I am able to see that it has nothing to do with ‘art’ in itself, I’ve made of art the excuse to project my own judgments toward my decisions, the way that I established relationships toward this something that I ‘built myself’ around, and as such because I realized I could not continue constructing myself as ‘an artist’ within the initial ideals I had, then I acted in spite and begun regretting and embarrassed by my choices in life as I see them as ‘useless’ without realizing that I was actually reacting at all the various others things I did in my life throughout that time of which I cannot be proud of either and that I cannot certainly recognize as ‘myself’ any longer so

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define me according to the relationships that I built with people and with specifically my career as ‘arts’ which in fact reflect all the choices in my life, the people that I chose to surround myself with and that I cannot really judge myself for who I was back then as back then I had no awareness of the points I am aware now.

So I realize that I have to stop being ‘hard’ on myself based on this hidden-experience of having ‘the past haunting me,’ and so be able to finally let go of it as I do not have to re-enact this kind of shame or embarrassment about myself, my past relationships, my emotionally-driven decisions in life because it is to realize that back then I didn’t know any other way – and so instead I am grateful to be able to be here writing myself, having deviated from ‘the path’ that I had initially chosen as god knows where the hell I would be if I had followed through my ‘lifestyle’ and the relationships I built around the same ego and personality that I was. I rather see and recognize that I’ve definitely moved on from that phase of my life, but! Also realizing that every time that I create an experience toward any memory, any relationship, any past choice including my decision to study arts, I recreate the entire network of ‘the who I was’ in my past and as such I continue enslaving myself to those relationships and only fuel the negative experiences that are the opposite polarity to the initial positive experiences that I used to build my relationships with people and with the profession/career I was veering myself toward.

And within this, I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to follow the usual pattern within the mind which is ‘dissing’ something once that one has squeezed the last drop of positive experience out of it, which means that once that it ‘served me’ and ‘its purpose’ and I’ve hit the ground back into reality about it and I am no longer seeing visions based on emotional and feeling experiences, then I go into the opposite polarity of talking bad about it and feeling righteous within that, without realizing that it is only the predetermined and rather predictable outcome from an initial positive experience that I created with such ‘passion’ about it that when the whole experience was no more, I ‘dropped’ down to the bottom and the opposite – so it happened just like a typical relationship wherein people first get in love with each other and as time progress and the energy runs dry, they part ways and talk shit about each other, so that’s what I did toward ‘art,’ and I didn’t even realize it because to me it was so right that it hadn’t fulfilled my expectations that I believed I had ‘the right’ to feel that way about it, without seeing the obvious: it was a feeling, an emotion, a judgment that came from nothing else but the ‘who I was’ toward art and so, within this ‘dissing’ recreating my past relationship to art over and over again – trapping myself in my own past.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to form emotional relationships toward what I deemed as ‘my career’ or ‘my path’ which in this case was art/being an artist and within this allow a physical process to become a rather emotionally driven relationship, similar to those that I’ve walked with individuals wherein there are a lot of feelings and emotions attached to something/someone that I want to hold onto and when the relationship is no more, such dependency then turns into a ‘lack’ of this fulfillment gotten from something or someone and as such, it turns into a form of bitterness ‘toward something or someone,’ without realizing that this all is really not about ‘art’ in itself or the people in my past relationships or else, it’s about myself and how I created relationships of dependency upon others in order to ‘satisfy me’ or ‘complete me’ or give me some kind of experience to which I could define myself, build myself, construct and upgrade myself as the ego that I was wanting to be within the ‘who I am’ as a professional artist as well as within the relationship formed in relation to who I am as an artist and in relationship to others.

 

Therefore I realize that the best way to follow through with this is to entirely let go of my experiences toward my past specifically and so be able to give myself back to myself as being able to focus on what is here, what I am working with, what I am developing as myself and also to align my relationship to art and be able to enjoy it, visiting museums or read about it, hear it, interact with it without loading the entire experience of ‘going to the museum’ and defining myself according to that any longer.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be spiteful in the past few years and whenever I would talk about some forms of contemporary art become infuriated and a bit angry about what I defined as being utterly selfish and self-centered and ‘useless’ to the problems that I was then realizing were ‘much more important than that’ – and in this, I still agree that there are more important points in life than some kinds of art that are merely conceptual and contemplative and ‘useless’ as a tool to create practical solutions to the world – however, this obviously doesn’t justify the fact that I’ve been spiteful and holding this love-hate relationship to it, and within this only fueling an inner conflict of still being interested in or curious about the current art forms that are emerging while at the same time judging it as useless so here

I had considered myself to feel bitter about art

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Bitter: causing pain or unhappiness. Feeling or showing angry hurt or resentment

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel bitter about art as in becoming resentful toward it and toward the people that create it, not realizing that I had exactly done the opposite for a prolonged period of time which is why the inner conflict arose in the first place, all based on me wanting to make of art the quintessential human experience and making it the most ‘honorable profession on Earth’ or so, and so believing that being an artist was the same or similar thing as to say I was chosen by god and/or touched by god, so in essence a lot of delusions of grandeur that I created within me and that I projected toward art. So, this bitterness as in being angry, resentful, dissatisfied toward art has to do with me having to let go of my own desires/hopes/dreams related to me becoming an artist. So once again, it has nothing to do with ‘art’ in itself but the expectations and experiences I created toward it and so, when realizing I had to stop pursuing my mind any further and only feeding my ego, that’s when the opposite relationship came up.

When and as I see myself feeling bitter about any form of art that I may see, read about or even people that create art and discuss their work – I stop and I breathe, I ensure that I am not tensing my physical body and experiencing that bolt of energy within me wanting to ‘let them know the truth about their creation’ which is in fact nothing else but me wanting to ‘express’ through reaction, as if I had ‘the truth’ within myself and so within this actually becoming nothing more than an ego that wants to be recognized for ‘my new position’ which is not really supportive but only a packet of resentment, judgments and overall bitterness toward that which I once praised.

I realize that this all comes from how much the entirety of ‘my world’ and ‘myself’ that I deemed as ‘real’ and ‘genuine’ were in fact not, so this whole relationship with art I remember very well was the first initial ‘big hit’ that I took when understanding who we are as the mind, as a preprogrammed mind consciousness system and that the thing I feared losing the most was the personality I had created through/as art and having chosen that path for myself, which is why that initial big fear of loss about this self-definition had such a ‘big impact’ in the aftermath, wherein I allowed myself to not be entirely self-directive toward art but instead then create the opposite polarity and so still participating within the mind. And this came through even though I believed I was ‘well over with it,’ only to test out not long ago that there were still reactions coming through the more ‘artistic’ documentaries I would watch and wanting to ignore the reactions to it until I simply believed that I had to ‘speak my mind’ about it – and yes, it was ‘my mind’ and a till here no further to when and as I see myself questioning or asking another about their creation from the starting point of the ‘bitter drop-out of an artist’ that I became in my mind, and so stop defining myself based on the choices of the past and focus on communicating or creating a dialogue based on what we can learn from it, what can be useful to understand our human condition or even innovate and take points to be creative in the ways that I can support myself and others through this process while using art as a supportive tool for it, without endowing it the entire ‘duty’ of ‘changing the world’ in itself, which as I’ve previously discussed, it’s impossible.

When and as I see myself wanting to create an experience of spite or disdain and bitterness toward ‘art’ and seeing it as useless or pointless while at the same time being curious about it, I stop and I breathe – I realize that both the negative and positive experiences are only re-creations of the ‘who I was’ in the past as an art-lover and then the who I became as the anti-thesis of that which was pretty much being very critical toward art within a negative context, and so I simply stop, breathe and observe/interact with it without creating any experience but rather seeing it objectively for what it is. And this is the challenge really because I had cult-ivated the experiences attached to works of art and becoming emotional about it, which I also learned from books at the same time. So I realize that all of my emotions and feelings are in fact nothing else but knowledge and information that I’ve translated into energetic experiences that serve no purpose for me to interact with something or someone.

 

I commit myself to be able to be here as breath while witnessing performances, watching/visiting museums or art galleries and also to remain here as breath when getting too excited about seeing something because that’s also once again recreating the same pattern of the visual vicious – which I’ve talked about extensively of – and so realize it’s just images, it’s just pictures, it’s just a part of reality and the only way I can ‘react’ to something is if I ‘load’ all my past-definitions in order to react based on memories and the knowledge that I had built around art and the ‘who I am’ toward art. So I can practically simply stop those past definitions and focus on reality.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to read about the Stendhal syndrome in some book and consider that I would get this kind of experiences such as seeing ‘the sublime’ and mostly images that would depict the end of the world, which is why I focused myself so much on depicting the end of the world and getting a kick out of it, and believe that these emotions were ‘normal’ to me and that I had all the right to ‘express them’ but, the reality is that it was all a self-created experience and that there was no ‘magic’ or ‘real connection’ to painting or anything like that which I believed was something ‘special’ within me. Therefore I realize that these experiences were pretty much all created within my desperate need to ‘feel something’ because I had deemed the ability to ‘feel’ as in becoming emotional as special, as sensitive, as ‘unique’ in a human being – and so I created my own web of experiences according to how I would see others would feel and so mimic it, read books that were very emotional and then going determining what I would find as ‘emotional’ and what I would like to experience and so integrate as part of the ‘who I was’ as the characters that I read about and that I eventually wanted to create for myself.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to made of past relationships as something conflictive and filled with ‘turmoil’ inside my mind as I realize that this was also part of the definition of who I wanted to be as a very sensitive person in order to be able to have stories to tell or talk about, as I believed that I had to suffer to make any real art. Therefore, I realize that any experience I created toward something or someone wasn’t part of reality as such, but entirely self created in my mind. Within this, I realize that also in my relationships the experiences I created about others were never ‘real’ as such, but only the plethora of experiences and definitions I created upon them – that’s why once the energy ran dry and seeing the individuals or situations that I was in within my life with sober eyes and frame of mind, the ‘truth’ of myself and the interactions with others/something came through as it is.

 

So a way to redefine a relationship it is to first of all no longer define tit through/as an emotion or feeling, something that we believe is ‘real’ in the mind based on memories, ideas, beliefs, past experiences that we then make real as our preference, as that which ‘we want,’ without taking physical reality into consideration.

Therefore an emotional relationship will always end up as a ‘fuck-up’ if it is not aligned to physical reality wherein I can stand as an individual that first of all ponders what it is that I sought in my relationship with something/someone that I believed I didn’t have myself, alone – and so realize that whichever I was expecting to get from ‘art’ or someone in my life were and had been all points of separation, illusions that I believed were unable to be experienced within me. So this is how the best way to create a relationship with someone or something is to ensure that it is seen through the eyes of physical reality, where no emotions, feelings, no past experiences, no ideals, wants, needs or desires become a decisive factor in terms of defining who I am toward others, as all I have to consider is myself and within doing that I can then interact with something/someone based on the principles that I can integrate within myself, as the relationship that I want to establish for myself so that no matter what I do, where I am, with who or alone, I remain stable, supporting myself, getting to know about others in the relationships formed with my reality, recognizing myself as one and equal with them, instead of seeing them as points to ‘fulfill me’ or things/experiences that I believed I lacked.

I realize that it’s been supportive to revisit this aspect of ‘my relationship to art’ to review my state of affairs in relation to other relationships based on emotions in the past, and so to focus on preventing further ‘fuckups’ as the ups and downs and polarity relationships of ‘love and hate’ as that is all of the mind –  instead there are more physical aspects and perspectives to consider here as well.

Life on Earth in itself is built through relationships, so I cannot define relationships only as personal relationships with something or someone, but rather realize that we are all made of and constantly require and exist as relationships that define the way we live in our world – therefore the more we are able to act, participate and be part of these relationships in a physical and common sensical manner without being driven by desires, hopes, dreams, fantasies and illusions, the more we will be able to begin changing the focus of our reality – from the distraction that emotional relationships are to a rather physical process of aligning ourselves to that which enables our coexistence in the best possible manner – no feelings/emotions required for that, no special relationships but rather the equalization and realization of who I am as this interdependence

 

to be continued…

Mechanical Heart 06

 

To learn more about how to establish proper Relationships suggest the Re-defining Relationships – Agreement Course  as well as:


385. The Most Important Job in the World: Parenting

 

A Review & Commentary on the Documentary ‘The Naked Room’/El Cuarto Desnudo (México, 2013)

Throughout this process I’ve realized that the most important job that exists is that of being a parent. As I go understanding the fabric of our society, I can see directly how the lack of parenting skills or even the inability to know what these are or should be reflects back to our society, shaping each one of us into the individuals that at the same time, create the nature of the ‘world-system’ as is, because when we talk about ‘the world’ it’s not really the Earth, the living beings other than humans that are the problem – the whole and sole problem is who we have become as human beings and how we have shaped, modified and distorted reality through and by our mind as a consequence of lacking any efficient education and parental guidance while we are brought up in this world, which in turn affects every other part of our reality as well.

So in essence, we’ve lacked the skills to support ourselves as the units of our society to grow strong, healthy, stable and with clear directives in our lives and as a result, this society is the mirror of the lack and/or misguidance of parenting skills.

 

El cuarto desnudo/The naked room from AMBULANTE on Vimeo.

“The naked room” shows a whole world without leaving a single space: the examination room in a children’s hospital in Mexico City. Listening to the children, their parents and the doctors during consultations allows us to have a more profound and complex view of our social reality and of human nature.

 

I watched the documentary ‘The Naked Room/ El Cuarto Desnudo’ some weeks ago, here’s part of a synopsis I found about it:

The Naked Room exposes the complex and hard situations that are the consequence of something as simple as a kid wishing for a more loving brother. Also, the behavior of people with a mental disorder, a condition that always affects the loved ones (sometimes even physically). Ibáñez has not created a documentary to be enjoyed by everybody per se, I mean, we’re dealing with a brutal theme in a very direct way, with no pauses; it’s a constant display of human sadness and mental problems.

It can be easily described as a depressing film, after all it’s a natural view to the life of several persons, and some of their closest relatives, whose hopelessness has lead (some of them) to go as far as attempting to take their own lives. In a way, The Naked Room is here to explain the “why” behind suicide or self-harming, specifically when the problem happens to a kid or a teenager. What’s great about Ibáñez’s film is the fact that she is not trying to explain anything by interviewing doctors and relatives or using information from other sources. The doc is simply crafted: it’s entirely based on footage obtained from a series of meetings between psychiatrics and patients.

Ibáñez knew that showing those conversations was enough for a thought-provoking piece. All she had to do was place the camera at the right spot and then working inside the editing room. And the camerawork is really interesting and precise; firstly, it only follows the patients, hence some scenes are just fascinating: observing the facial expressions of the children while their respective relative is talking with the doctor brings a unique feeling, as the conversations deal with nothing childish, indeed.

For about half an hour we don’t see the same patient more than once, so The Naked Room engages you. The audience will want to know what’s behind, for instance, a problematic kid whose father has threatened to abandon him in the streets. There are many patients involved, so when each one of them appears again, you might be a bit confused, not remembering who is who; that could have been a flaw related to the structure, but the confusion is always temporal.

And, ultimately, the diversity only helps the documentary to be thematically richer. It can be seen as an exploration of teenagers, with such themes exposed as insecurity and social rejection, but that’s just one of its layers. The Naked Room is, simply, one of the strongest Mexican films of the year (my personal favorite from the Morelia documentary selection), even when it’s simply crafted, like I said, and very short (less than 70 minutes).”

Read more: http://twitchfilm.com/2013/10/morelia-2013-review-the-naked-room-el-cuarto-desnudo-a-powerful-display-of-sadness-and-insanity.html#ixzz2wu4eXQg1

 

The constant identification of parental patterns being transmitted onto children, the lack of creating supportive familial relationships and living environment, the lack of money to have proper nutrition, healthcare, education themselves, the fact that some parents didn’t want their children in the first place, the fact that they resort to hitting them for not complying to do what they asked them to do, the physical and verbal abuse between parents, the divorces and separations that affect a child’s ability to learn and interact with others properly, the lack of sexual orientation support, the threats used as a way to establish discipline that are depicted as part of the reasons why the kids in this documentary develop mental instability, can all be traced back to the parents and the unfortunate lack of skills, information and education on how to deal with their own lives, their marriage/relationships and in turn how to be a mother or a father.

In turn, parents have only learned to react to seeing the problem that their children develop as something born out of the blue, which is the position of becoming a victim to their children’s mental instability in the form of worry and preoccupation due to not knowing ‘what is going on with their children?’ without realizing that their role is inevitably implied within what their children are experiencing as well. However, can we talk about it solely being ‘their fault’?

 

nakedroom1

 
Understanding Who We Are as The Mind

Parents were educated in turn by their own parents and consequently the same has happened to those parents as well, which means that the parent-child relationship is the essential relationship that has shaped (ruined) the way that we develop ourselves as human beings. You might react and say ‘not me’ and I could as well, but the fact is that even if one can consider oneself having ‘good parents’ or ‘supportive parents’ the moment that there’s no principle of support to understand the mind, the feelings, the emotions, the ‘who am I’ as the mind and assist with the integration of physical living words that we can live as a decision, a self-directive process that one directs oneself to express as a Living Principle, one is already missing out the most important aspects of our relationship to ourselves, others and in turn the ‘who we are’ and will become as we come of age in this world – instead, we’ve been brought up with mechanisms that use fear, control, violence, abuse, threats in order to establish some sense of discipline and direction, as well as happiness, rewards, ‘love’ and the illusion thereof as ways to create the ‘good’ and ‘bad’ definitions that we’ve limited ourselves by, going all the time attempting to be ‘happy’ and/or dreaming of reaching an eternal happiness without even understanding how that is also a mindjob essentially. We’ve only learned to ‘cope with reality’ by reacting to the environment, to another’s words, to take things personal, to seek revenge, to be spiteful and that is of course already a massive fault in parental skills.

Not to blame ‘them’ though…

The reality is that we’ve never ever had such skills, because we had not ever before understood who we are as the mind, how it is that we are separated from our physical body through and by the mind which is a Mind Consciousness System, a design, a programmed patterned system that generates thoughts, feelings, emotions and through this our behavior, personality, fears, reactions, beliefs, etc. that we have adopted and believed is ‘who we are.’ In this documentary we can see this reality as spectators of a glimpse of how far one can experience one’s emotions and feelings to the extent of wanting to die just because there is no proper medical support, assessment or understanding of what the mind is, what our emotions is, how the patterns that we’ve acquired from parents are imbued from the moment of conception, and at birth we are directly influenced by every single word that parents speak, every single move, every single experience that parents have within themselves while being with the child – and this I am almost certain only an excruciating minority of parents have taken into consideration.

 

it is so damn clear in this documentary how the fact that we have taken our minds personally and others’ reactions personally, while being unable to understand Why such patterns of aggression, violence, harm, hatred exist and are coming from ‘those’ that should have ‘cared’/‘educated us’ to be able to live in this world the best way possible, which is what creates the traumatic experiences within children  that evolve to become ‘mental illnesses’ because of our inability as parents to stand as living principles for them, to become all of us in society a living example of how to live, interact and direct oneself in this world. This has been our ‘missing link’ in the relationship between parents and children, but also in our society as a whole.

 

The-Naked-Room

 

The First Seven Years of Your Life

At Desteni it’s been explained how the time-frame of development from ages 0-7 is crucial in our development because that’s where the ‘programming’ process of the mind takes place, activating all the pre-existent patterns coming from parents, integrating new ones from the child’s interaction with their immediate environment – which are most of the times, parents or any other ‘parental figure’ –

“The inheritance and transference of the survival skills from both your parents takes place when the entire mind consciousness system develops within you within the mother’s womb together with your physical development. The copying and duplication of the survival skills from both your parents takes place through your observations, interactions and participations with your parents’ as the parent/child relationship develops during your childhood years (from two to three years up to the age of thirteen years).”

Veno – Structural Resonance – Part 2 – Phase 5

 

This means that the direct effect of our words, thoughts, behavior and emotional or feeling participation is imprinted onto children from such early stage of their lives, with them being like a virgin cd that one is about to literally ‘burn’ with information that they will simply then replay, adjust and ‘upgrade’ throughout their entire lives.  That is the magnitude and importance of the responsibility we have toward every individual that is born into this world: the world we have for them at their arrival will become the program, the structure, the patterns they’ll accept as ‘how things are’ with the possibility of only changing them once that they’ve walked their own lives, their consequences and decide for themselves to change what they have learned up to that point, which is the process of Self-Honesty and Self Responsibility that we are walking here at Desteni.

 

So, while watching the documentary El Cuarto Desnudo I could understand for example what has been explained in the  Spite series of interviews at Eqafe in relation to Self-Harm. Some of the kids in the documentary attempting to commit suicide, cut/punch/harm  as a response to the disbelief they had of having their parents attacking them, insulting them, not giving them all the necessary attention, hitting them, abusing them in various ways as well as managing them with ‘fear’ which in result, in a helpless attitude of ‘I just don’t know what to do with her/him anymore, doctor!’ which to a young child it doesn’t make sense that your parent, your ‘guide’ is becoming your own worst enemy or an inept person to take proper care of you and as such, even if they say ‘they care for you’ or they ‘love you’ they are still not being supportive at all in the situation… doesn’t make sense isn’t it?

And no, it won’t make sense. And this is the point we’ve missed all along and that can actually support, assist parental relationships to entirely change because what hasn’t been understood is how the Mind operates, how the mechanisms of creation of energy as emotions, thoughts, feelings is what has become the directive principle, the sole ‘director’ of ourselves to the extent that we comply to such mind/thoughts/feelings/emotions absolutely ignoring our physical bodies, the living flesh that we are and that we should never ever harm in order to ‘relieve’ some sort of emotional or feeling experience which comes from a constant struggle and inner conflict to ‘cope’ with what’s going on up there in the mind, because the children look perfectly ‘healthy’ at a physical level, but in the mind they are certainly completely possessed and this is a clear testimony for us to see what the mind does to the physical body and why it is so important to take responsibility for our minds, our bodies and completely take both into consideration before continuing inflicting any harm or abuse upon oneself, only acting upon what we ‘feel’ or experience as thoughts, emotions in the mind.

In the documentary, almost every child would cut/harm themselves, and I’m talking about Children here –  which becomes a form of self-spite: anger toward oneself so that it becomes a way to spite the parents, which doesn’t make sense to spite oneself in an attempt to get another’s attention or ‘get back at’ someone when one is being ‘attacked’ by another, as that will then in turn become the attack and abuse onto oneself, the very same attack that one can be complaining about is coming from parents.  However because children are not taught how to deal with the emotions they have at a mind level, the only way to ‘cope’ with this inner turmoil which becomes self-hate is to resort to self-destruction. Do ‘they’ really want to do it? No, it’s who they are as the mind that want to harm themselves, just because the amount of energy continued to be thought of and used up by the individual is too extensive for the child to stop and get back to physical reality to understand how one is abusing one’s own body and in essence doing onto themselves what they were complaining that others were doing onto them at first – and this is how the ‘chain’ of self-abuse is continued.

 

EPSON scanner image

 

 

Learning from the Parents

With friction and conflict stemming from their family/environment situation, children learn to ‘cope’ with the constant conflictive and problematic situations with their own emotions generated as a reaction to things they see in their environment, things they are unfortunately done onto, and not having any way to stand up or stop participating in these automated reactions in the mind. And these can obviously be of a wide variety of factors, such as lack of money/education that turns into a poor household where parents have to work to make a living for the entire day – being left with other family members that might turn abusive, that might not properly care after them – sometimes the parents/relatives resorting to alcohol/drugs to cope with stress, to mitigate hunger, to mitigate family abuse, being depressed, being in the verge of financial bankruptcy…. there’s also marriage disruption, physical and verbal abuse between parents, abuse from parents to child which turns into children then hitting the parents/spiting the parents, desperation from parents for not knowing what to do with them and so children see themselves as being ‘a problem’ a ‘drag’ to the parents to the extent that they reason it’s best to die/commit suicide than continue living – and this may come from parents expressing them that ‘they don’t know what to do with them any longer’ or how ‘they wished they had never been born’  which once again, to a child and even if you the reader  never got told this, placing ourselves in the shoes of children being told this, it is mostly obvious that there will be a reaction of feeling worthless, not desired, not loved, inferior and this remains as permanent rejection throughout their lives unless they encounter support while growing up to not take such words personally, but understand how they come from parental distress, desperation, not knowing ‘what to do’ with their own lives and in turn not knowing what to do with their children.

 

There might emerge a desire to blame parents for that – but blame once again would lead us to miss out the point here. Blaming, holding grudge, being constantly mad, angry, frustrated at parents or even hating them is only the outflow of not getting a supportive, comforting and adequate parental support for the parents themselves to begin with while they were in the position of being the children. And one would say, yes, it makes sense to be angry for not getting that – but, this is where I implore you to consider the ‘greater context’ which is how I assisted myself to – within and after the documentary ended – be able to clearly see where the surges of blame or anger toward parents were coming from and immediately understand how it is necessary to see the ‘greater context’ to take all points into consideration to understand such parental and children relationships throughout our entire history.

The key here is understanding a very, very important point: All can be Self-Forgiven and Must be Self-Forgiven in order to stop holding on to the grudges created from children to parents and vice-versa if we truly want to change the world.

 

Human Chains (pic)

 

No ‘parent’ knows How to be a Parent.

No person is born knowing How to be a parent, a self supportive and adequate one, how to become an example for your child to ‘look up to’ because No Human Being has EVER been such Living Example for oneself or for others – yet. Sure there have been great personalities in the world that were ‘great men and women,’ but even that one can notice that people in politics or social change in the world such as Mandela for example, when his daughters were interviewed they were proud of him for the principles he stood for, but as a parent they had no further comment other than really not knowing ‘him’ as such, because he had not really been around with them….. point to ponder.

So, the problem is in fact not that we haven’t learned ‘how to be a parent’ but how to be a Living Human Being. We have only been mind-robots driven by thoughts, feelings, emotions, not knowing ‘how’ to cope with them, how to direct them because we entirely accepted ‘who we are’ as our mind and so, what happens is that the moment that we Identify ourselves with the mind as ‘Who we are’ entirely without any possibility of change, that’s where we dissociate ourselves from our ability to be self-directive which means, realizing that everything that we’ve become is the byproduct of generation after generation of human beings that have not known how to direct/deal with one’s thoughts, feelings and emotions – in essence with one’s mind – but only learned from certain religious and moral dogmas and ‘authorities’ that became only ways to control people through fear, or control through the illusion of ‘love’ which is another point I have had previously discussed.

 

 

What does being a Living Human Being mean?

The self that we all have and can become the moment that we start living and applying the realization that one has to honor, support, care, develop and nurture oneself to become an example of what it is to act, do and speak what is best for oneself and everyone else as equals. Becoming the Living Word, the Living Example for oneself and others to follow as the norm, the way, the law of our being in which we can trust ourselves and each other to realize that no matter what: I honor, consider, support and care for myself , I stand as my own support and as such, stand as support for and toward everything/everyone else as myself, as life, as equals. This is the standard, this is how we can genuinely ‘change the world.’

So because we have failed to live this way with and for ourselves, the consequence is and has been that all our relationships have failed to be fruitful and bloom into a world that we can all be genuinely ‘happy’ to live in. With understanding this premise of the ‘legacy’ we have in terms of the ‘human nature’ as the mind, the generation after generation passing of ‘the sins of the fathers’ it then becomes much easier to understand why a human being that has taken the role of being a parent has failed to become a living example for his/her children, because the consideration of being a Living Human Being has never existed – yet we do have all the potential of each one of us becoming such living example of being the human beings that we all know we can be and become – and this is where our responsibility resides: to ensure that we can be the example of how the so-called ‘human nature’ is able to be self-forgiven, stopped, self corrected and changed.

 

This understanding that I just shared here in written words is what I used to then see, realize and understand and self forgive the surges of any emotions that could have been accumulated while watching the documentary, and through this understanding rather seeing this documentary not only as presentation of the problems we have within children at a mental level – instead, it also becomes a  motivation to see once again for myself that there is just SO much that is required to get done in relation to education in this world, so much to be understood about the mind, who we are as the mind and how we can in fact support each other to assist those children to change and solve their experiences… but most importantly the Parents of those and any other children to prevent ‘The Naked Rooms’ around the world where children attempt to get support from psychiatrists, while not even being aware of the root and cause of the problem: ourselves as individuals, as human beings that have never lived to the best of our potential – but have only ‘coped’ with reality through and as a mind system that generates constant friction and conflict as the experience of ‘living.’ And to grasp this there’s quite a lot of understanding and information to self-educate oneself about this, which I will provide at the end of this blog.

 

 

Self Forgiving the Sins of the Parents 

Once one understands how ‘who we are’ is the reflection of what we’ve always been since the beginning of ourselves as humanity, we can truly see that there is no other way out of our hatred, our anger, our despair, our grudges, our laments, our grief toward parents, children, relatives or authority figures other than applying the principle of Self Forgiveness. Without Self-Forgiveness it would be very difficult to come to a resolution about any form of abuse that one has experienced through one’s life, whether from parents or anyone else. So I suggest to dissolve the word tag of ‘parent’ for a moment and just see ourselves as human beings, not being born knowing ‘how to live’ and ‘how to be self-directive in our mind’  and begin applying Self-Forgiveness for allowing ourselves to be driven by thoughts, emotions, feelings, reactions wherein as a child, one has no further idea as to what is being experienced within self – all the fear, the worry, the stress, the anger, the rage,the hate that is formed at home toward parents, siblings, teachers, schoolmates, all of it existing within self without proper direction other than medicines and ‘cures’ that don’t take into consideration the source and core of the problem: the who we are and have accepted and allowed ourselves to be and become as the mind.

 

I’ve noticed that one of the most difficult things to do for children/people that have been abused by others – whether they are parents, siblings, relatives, schoolmates, etc. – is the ability to self-forgive, to absolutely take into consideration and understand why the other individual abuses, take into consideration their entire life, their entire upbringing, their social and economic background, their habits/addictions, their ‘modus vivendi’ and experiences and how they too also didn’t know at the same time HOW to deal with their own minds, and how it is the same for all of us – not a single one left without a mark – of passing this unresolved understanding of who we are as human beings from generation after generation up to the point where our ‘fuckups’ are escalating to the extent that one can only look at 3 year olds – or even earlier than that now –to already see the patterns they mirror of the parents and the generations that have gone before us.

One could say: well how come they learn to manipulate, to spite, to be envious and selfish, to be depressive, to be sensitive, to be angry, to hit others to get what they want, to treat others as superior or inferior, to like and dislike, to be a stubborn… and yes, a child is the entire reflection of the parents and of humanity in its entirety for that matter that only develops the rest of the pre-installed programming through the interactions with parents and the environment. And because it is only now that we are understanding these mechanisms that exist within the mind in the physical and the vital importance that this mind and physical relationship has in our upbringing, it means that we still have a lot to do in this world in order to make each one of us aware of this process, how to direct it, how to support ourselves so that we can start establishing solutions and a new educational process where we can change the world by changing humanity, which means: changing the way that we educate ourselves as human beings, which implies at the same time that the relationship between parents and children is the one we have to focus on, as it will be the guideline and blueprint for all other relationships developed by the child throughout their/our entire lives.

 

This also thus ties in with the previous blog entry wherein I explained to the people that first didn’t want to hear how it is about time that we STOP the patterns that we’ve continued from generation after generation in relation to the abuse of ‘educating children’ by hitting them, or teaching them to ‘fight/attack back’ upon abuse or become spiteful and vengeful… all of this MUST GO and Must be stopped by ourselves as the parents, the family members, the teachers, the siblings, the people around kids to become the examples of the way we can Always direct ourselves in a way that is best for everyone: self supportive, considerate, being able to communicate effectively, being the living words of the principles we want our children to embody as well and as such, children will learn by default  – from their very first interactions in a world where we all act and live by principle of what is best for all and as such, by default, learn how to live by principles too.

It is only an excuse and negligence to say that the human can’t change, that we can only resort to psychologists or psychiatrists – this is unacceptable. What we require is to apply a New understanding and vision of who we are as human beings in order to support every single being that comes into this world to adopt the new living ways that we can begin living within ourselves individually and in the ‘without’ as the way the world system operates. For that, investigate the Living Income Guaranteed to provide support for parents to have sufficient time to stay at home implementing the new education available for parents and for any other individual –regardless of being a parent or not – at the DIP Lite course for free.

 

It certainly won’t be the same to bring a child to a self-supportive world where you have a guaranteed income/have your human rights being genuinely granted and assured with money provided to you from birth than a baby that is born in a condition of poverty in a third world country where not even a solid foundation of family or parents exist, because everyone is on a survival modality. It doesn’t make sense anymore to continue allowing our children to grow up in front of the TV and computer screens or taken care by ‘third parties,’ and the reason why this is so is because everyone has to ‘get a job to live’ and there’s no support given to parents to get time to educate their children. This should make it clear how it is all of us that are ‘shooting our leg’ by not providing to each other the right to life, so it’s about time we understand that the new way of Living is to Support Ourselves and Support All Life Equally to become our fullest potential.

 

To learn how to stop being only a mind that perpetuates the patterns and sins of the fathers, research:

 

Parental Support:

 

Parenting and Educational Blogs:

 

Vlogs:


379. “This World is the Universe’s Asylum”

 

“Ask yourself this: Does mankind deserve redemption for everything it’s done? Is this a world which deserves to be saved? Everything you see around you, all those wars, all those acts of destruction and brutality were caused by the minds of people. We’ve destroyed this world without even batting an eyelid and you wish for us to be saved? Why?
Though well intentioned, your solutions will fail and never be heard; your voice of reason is barely a whisper in this world. How are you going to convince 7 billion people to be compassionate, loving, kind and respectful to one another and the world? You can’t and you won’t. Sorry. We condemned ourselves to this hell hole existence a long time ago. This world is the universe’s asylum. Have fun in the mad house!! Get the 9-5 job, work until your old, watch TV, eat junk food, obey the law. Trust me, this world ain’t going anywhere. It’s here to stay, sadly. You may as well partake in the madness while you’re here. What else is there to do?”
FocusReborn

 

This is a comment placed as a response to the vlog I Want the World to End and it brings up the same mentality that I would have remained in – or probably dug my own grave with – if I had not stumbled upon Desteni and taking on this Journey to Life, to finally shed the skin of apathy and misanthropy that at times emerges whenever I see or read about things that I haven’t yet fully realized are part of everything that is here, myself, no matter how hideous they may be.

 

Pollution - 2003 - Marlenlife

 

To the person that wrote the comment, thanks for writing it out as it has opened up a window of opportunity to renew my vows to myself and this process and explain the starting point of everything that we do, which  is precisely to get past such enslaved mentality of ‘nothing’s gonna change the world’ and only seek and con-form with bits of highs here and there and sit down and feel miserable about every thing that we’ve been and become, all that we’ve created as a world that we rather feel sad, ashamed of, despise or even ‘accept as is’ instead of doing something about it.  This is the kind of message that can only trap you when one believes oneself to be ‘so small, so little, so insignificant’ to create any form of change in this world, which certainly begins with ourselves, our own life.

 

It’s astounding how we discourage each other from stepping out of the (mind)frame, however I understand the individual’s starting point for sharing this and how the origin of such words are not even questioned by the author, I can read no life in it, it’s only a mind speaking for it’s own survival: the resistance to change, the hopelessness, helplessness, conformity, apathy and judgmental behavior for the sake of seeing everyone else on ‘the same boat,’ seemingly lost.  And this is not to be taken personal, as once again, it’s not the potential of life speaking for the individual, but only the ‘who we are’ as the lesser form of ‘life’ that we have become, the de-manned position.

 

The starting point of walking this process is not within the hopes of ‘changing 7 billion people,’ that would be rather disingenuous and not  considering the reality that we are in wherein yes, it will take a long time to change our current human nature, it will take the most effort from each one of us since it is as if we were all addicts of the worst kind wherein our very own lives and this planet’s stability depends on us getting unhooked from very addictive drugs which creates secondary reactions such as fear of changing, apathy, complacency, hopelessness, helplessness, positivity, negativity that I also once experienced, seeing no way out and then simply deciding to ‘jump in the boat’ of the hopeless ones, because apparently feeling miserable about the world make me at least ‘feel good’ and ‘alive’ – yes, it sounds contradictory if one does not understand how the mind operates. Once you get to understand who we are as the mind and decide to stop feeding the constant desire, want and need to FEEL anything – whether positive or negative – you start realizing how puny this little energy-whoring system that we’ve become really is.

 

Robot man - 2003 - Marlenlife

 

However it does take quite a constant and diligent decision to stop seeking the energy, the experience, the ‘thrill’ and instead breathe and direct oneself to what is physically supportive – and yes, that means that there’s no ‘highs’ or ‘bad’ experiences in doing what’s best for all, in moving oneself to become a living example of a mind-addict reformed human being, and that’s why walking this process is so unpopular in our reality – for now – because it provides no energetic payoff that one can feel ‘good about.’ Yet, all I can say is that consequences in our reality are knocking on everyone’s door and I certainly cannot recommend to anyone anything else but getting hands on keyboard or pen and start writing, start straightening up ourselves, start making sense of our own ‘mindful selves’ wherein the usual points of support sought are street or over-the-counter drugs, ad-vices from other people, escapism through alcohol, sex, developing ‘extreme habits’ only to get away from facing oneself…

 

This is the nature of our current selves drowned in a very limited pit that exists as the mind that we have delegated our every-moment of our lives to. And so, the entire ‘mess’ and ‘Universe’s asylum’ that who we are as this world have become is nothing else but a proof, a written testimony of what the majority of us are thinking and acting upon every single day, making of these thoughts our creed. And then we ponder ‘why are we so fucked up???’ while ignoring that the sheer experience one usually has when asking such question with extreme awe is already a 1+ vote to humanity’s  similar thought-patterns and experience – and once again: an experience ONLY exists in our mind.

 

Look at the trees, look at the animals, look at the air: does it show any emotion or feeling or speak about ‘giving up’ or ‘seeing no way out in this world’? Do birds get depressed and tired when the sun comes up and think of rather staying in a branch wallowing in their misery? Of course not. If anything, every single part of this existence is far more aware than a human being, and by all parts I mean animals, plants, nature, every blade of grass and that includes what we consider ‘inanimate’ too – it’s just common sense that everything that is here is an enclosed reality of which we’ve never been ‘outsiders’ from, which means that everything we see and are here is ourselves, our creation. 

 

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Deciding to jump into the comfort of apathy, disdain, hatred, misanthropy or plain disgust with ourselves as humanity is nothing else but another justification, excuse and distraction to not acknowledge what it is that we are here for: to understand ourselves as creators. Yes, we have even built gods to do the ‘dirty work’ for us and have someone to blame for everything that went wrong,  just because we’ve been so scared to realize and understand that every single atrocity committed in this world is ourselves, and yes, I know, it does get your reactions going on when witnessing some horrible acts that reveal our current human decay, but that’s the whole point of it: it’s about realizing that any atrocity, any thought, word and deed against life is committed by everyone of us each time that we do not act within the consideration of what is best for all, which imply energy-less physical moments of self-direction, self-will, self-responsibility and self-honesty to act in the best interest of all.

 

These are empty words without having context as to how to live them, because they are not part of our inherent programming as to understand ‘How to be self-honest,’ ‘How to learn how to Care for yourself and another,’ ‘how to develop self-integrity,’ ‘how to become self-directive.’ In a world where the word responsibility is immediately hooked on to the usual connotations of fear and resistance, it becomes quite ‘challenge’ to remove the veils and see thing for the potential we all have to change each word into a living expression wherein, in fact,  taking self-responsibility is one of the most empowering things we can do in our reality.

 

Defeated - 07

 

Look at the ‘elites,’ those in ‘power,’ they stand as points of responsibility in our societies and because the rest of us decided to cross our arms, sit and watch TV to be entertained, they automatically got a carte blanche to do whatever they would think about that would provide the best experience, the greatest reward, the most power – isn’t this something that we All participate in as well? So why are we blaming Others for ‘doing bad things to us’ when we think and assess our reality using the exact same mental framework that ‘THEY’ do to commit the ‘BAD’ and ‘EVIL’ deeds in the world – people are nothing else but parts of ourselves we continue to deny as ourselves too, and within this we believe we don’t have any ‘say’ on this world because apparently ‘we haven’t done anything wrong’ but as long as one continues to fear outcomes instead of walking through the solution in the moment itself, we’ll continue to lengthen our process: unless we stand up for ALL life within the understanding that the part that commits all atrocities, all the madness, the neglect, the irresponsibility, the dishonesty, the nastiness is the ‘who we are’ and have become as the Mind – yet, who ‘those’ people are as flesh and bones is no different to anyone of us reading these words and that’s where each one of us has the potential to wake up from zombieland mindcontrol and start realizing how much time and space we’ve wasted in ‘feeling like a waste’ in a world that we’re turning into a wasteland with our own apathy to correct and direct things into its right place, to deliberately push ourselves to become individuals that can be trusted with life.

But again, ‘trusted with life’ seems meaningless and pointless when we haven’t even been ‘alive’ for real, we’ve only existed as automated patterns that we have called our life and within such diminished and narrow-view we then create an equally narrow view of our ‘doomed lives’ wherein we dare to write comments like the guy that wrote that – once again – without even understanding or pondering about the origin of such words and how within each one of us ‘living’ such words, we become the very problem subsumed in the ‘greater problem’ that we’ve made of our reality, due to this accepted and allowed apathetic and dreadful behavior of ‘nothing’s going to change anyways.’

 

Well, I’ve been there done that, and the reason why I made that video is precisely to address and reach out to anyone that feels the exact same way, which is quite common since everything we see around us is mostly the ultimate decay and bottom line that we’re reaching as humanity. There’s no denial of that, however this is about realizing that who we are and have become is nothing else but the worst of the worst, the lowest point that we can reach as a collective, to finally understand how we feel miserable and so create this world as misery because of such thoughts existing within ourselves in the first place. And so, the rest goes on with each word we direct to continue drowning ourselves in our self-created torment in our minds, without realizing that in doing so, we’re doing nothing else but creating excuses and justifications as to why we’re not standing up and taking responsibility for the mess that we’ve collectively created.

 

DSC00528

 

Have we been ‘bad’ as human beings? One only has to see the results of our thoughts, words and deeds and have the results speak for themselves. If we continue to bash us,judge us, blame each other and ultimately lose any sense of respect for oneself and another, we will continue living in our current world that we are all so fed up of, yet we fail to see that the answer to stop recreating the ‘shithole’ resides in our very own hands, in our words, in our actions, in the decision to live and do what gives zero energetic high, but endless self-stability and clarity that emerges with the certainty of being and doing what is right, what is best for all.

 

Fortunately, I’m walking this process to never again allow myself to be trapped in the swamps of the moody mind patterns of ‘this world is going to hell, so why bother doing anything about it?’ and actually deliberately direct myself to investigate, create and support solutions to this world, which at this stage, must come from the realization that We CAN do this if we all give ourselves that initial chance to stop the addiction to feeling miserable, sad, depressed, hopeless, helpless and instead realize that this world is about breathing and doing, not about feeling and thinking, that’s been our whole problem, so let’s stop rambling, let’s rather become part of a 1+ human physical body that decides to live, breathe and create in consideration of what’s best for all, that’s deal reached.

 

We’re not here to save others, we’re here to stand up, face and correct ourselves, and within understanding who this self is, you then won’t require to get entangled with the idea of ‘changing 7 billion people.’ So I suggest: less thinking,  more of self-awareness, developing self-integrity required to do this as a principled living, not as a result-driven thing – this is about making a decision of who one is every single moment, where I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to exist within a limited framework of my mind wherein I have seen the world from the ‘gloomy-scope,’ meaning seeing no way out, without realizing I was only seeing through this thought/emotion filter of mind which I became used to because it was much easier to ‘feel bad’ than stopping and actually doing what is supportive for oneself: to stop thinking, and feeling miserable and instead focus on the potential that exists within each one of us to ‘save oneself’ from becoming another mental patient in the asylum that each one of us reside in when existing only in the mind.

 

So, this world isn’t the asylum: our minds are our personalized one, and as long as we remain complacent to what we think, believe, feel, experience only in our imaginary worlds: the world will still look like a perverted-story of what could have been a genuine paradise. Is it too late? is there salvation? is there ‘light’ at the end of the tunnel? I don’t know, nor do I Have to KNOW as that would only once again be a creation of the asylum mentality that keeps us bound to fear, limitation and neglect most of the times. So, the solution is to act in every moment that we are here and can physically act in the best interest of ourselves and each other, which begins the moment we decide to stop participating in the collective delirium of giving up on ourselves and the world, without understanding first how it only is another trick of our minds that we can also stop and correct to not be shaken again by words, pictures, thoughts, imaginations that maintain us in our schizophrenic reality, separated from what is real here.

 

My voice and that of others walking with within this journey might seem a ‘whisper in the 7 billions in this world,’ but again, trying and change others is not our goal either, it would be cool but we understand how reality and self-change works,  so we can be the example of what it is to be able to shed the skin of limited prepackaged personalities and genuinely learn how to create ourselves, it’s the best process one can ever undertake in this world, yet be warned: there is no ‘high’ in it and that’s the challenge: this process won’t make you feel greater, stronger, smarter or being just the god in your world, and that’s the whole point: to learn how to live as physical beings instead of existing as walking mind delusions on two feet that do not even understand why we follow every single thought that comes in our mind and immediately thinking ‘its me thinking’ ‘it’s me talking’ ‘it’s me feeling…..

 

Mr. Madhouse porter – what else is there to do in this world, in our lives but to get ourselves out of the personalized asylum? Only in insanity would anyone want to remain in a miserable and limited position, so let’s start with developing a bit of care to see what it is that we would really want to live like in this world and start doing something about it.  We all are the madhouse’s porter until we dare to see that the insanity only exists in the mind, not the physical.

 

It wasn't Eve - 07

 

To broaden one’s spectrum of reality:


355. Activism and Mind Control

 

Time to get some critical thinking skills here to test whether you are emotionally driven to Change the System or supporting causes that have no viability to be implemented and generate permanent solutions that can correct the ways in which we are individually and collectively creating the world system we are all realizing must be corrected – is Activism the way to do this?

Continuing:

 

Problems – Part 1                                         

  • Could it be that the same mind control techniques that in the past century were used to make people compulsively buy and link this experience to a sense of freedom, self determination and democratic values are now being utilized to generate a binding force through an empathic emotional experience between individuals that are informed and/or get to ‘know the truth’ about the reality of how the world system through functions through specific documentaries and audiovisual materials that end up ‘uniting’ people under the banner of ‘standing up to the system’ with promoting apolitical and mostly illegal and off the grid plans to ‘get away from the system/ boycott the system’ and establish/create ‘free societies’? We have witnessed how by the same principle of The Shock Doctrine, People united by a common feeling about  a common particular subject are easily controllable once they are united with an emotional bond and necessary directions to be pulled out from creating and establishing any real solutions in this world.

 

  • Activism in the 21st century is being engineered in the same way that the Propaganda techniques developed by Edward Bernays in the 20th century were used to instill new values in the American society that lead to benefit the corporate agenda to be fulfilled and become what we currently live in as a corporate totalitarian capitalistic system.  Pictures, Sounds and Words were used in order to motivate individuals to buy, consume and experience happiness, linking the power of acquisition with a sense of Self Determination, Freedom and Democracy, which made the individuals believe they were living with absolute free will and free choice – The very Revelation Process of these techniques used to control people in the past century are now being used as a way to unite people that are now ‘aware’ of how the system works and are aware of the Mind Control  techniques, the hidden history of our nations, the real ‘powers’ in our society, etc.,  but at the same time this same people are now being unaware of how these movements are created using the very same mechanisms that they are now aware of were used to control people in the past, such as emotional and visual manipulation that is commonly felt by people that in the case of becoming aware of the world system, create a common experience of feeling enraged, angered, frustrated, cheated and betrayed, forming an emotional binding force used to now invert Bernays’ techniques to make people buy, consume and be happy to now use them on  the people that are aware of this mind control itself in order to deviate their obvious experiences as a result of ‘finding out the truth,’ deviating their awareness of the problems in this world  to a non-challenging set of organizations in order to be further contained/maintained in a controlled form of ‘Activism’  and kept ‘at bay’ using the same emotional irrational experiences of the humans and channeling them through a new  ‘Pursuit of happiness’ in a reversed manner which is not through buying and consuming, but in the form of boycotting the system, creating revolutions, protests, off the grid solutions and civil disobedience – all of this generating the same experiences that people in the past century – and unfortunately even till today – are still existing in which is a sense of freedom, self determination and an adulterated version of Democracy as the right to determine our future outside of the system.

 

  • We could also make a parallel to how with the banner of ‘Freedom’ the exercise of ‘Free Market Capitalism’ was meant to give the individuals absolute free range to do business without having any form of governmental regulation, we all know and are living in the consequences of corporate savage greed that has had no limitations till this day to continue growing their profits and maintaining the wealth in the hands of a few. That is their pursuit of happiness and they are the same individuals that most of the activism is now fighting against, not realizing that the solutions they present stand within the same bounds of what a Free Market Capitalist was advocating: “no intervention of the government, let us do everything our way” – bad idea, to say the least.

 

  • It became part of our new discoveries that people were in fact being Mind Controlled and lead to consume in order to experience happiness, fulfillment, self determination and freedom.  This was made public by major companies like the BBC and Adam Curtis’ The Century of the Self, where the public got educated on what has been a form of Mind Control in the 20th century in relation to consumerism. However this same new understanding and realizations about the money system, the elites, the corporations, the banking systems, the 99% and any other point that is now considered as ‘exposing the truth’ are being used to generate films, documentaries or visual materials with very well engineered emotional and future projection content in order to provide for a salvation, a remedy  and hope for a ‘way out’ of the prison once that ‘the truth is out’ about the reality we’ve been living in.  These movements became the receptacles of these thousands if not millions of people around the world that have felt cheated, betrayed and used by the government, the authorities, the religious systems and essentially every single aspect of the world system that we all once trusted to be ‘flawed’ but ‘at least working.’ Well, we all know that the real ‘working’ was in fact being provided by our coerced participation in the system to generate the most profits for a minority, while being fed dreams glued to a carrot on a stick.

 

  • The experience of rage, desolation, depression, anger and disempowerment are generated while watching these very well produced documentaries where the individual is being exposed and witnessing ‘the truth’ being unveiled in front of their eyes, which required a necessary net or ‘channeling’ to ensure that people would not just find out about the secret societies, illuminati, the banking systems, the elites, etc., and plan to take over the government or do massive rioting or anything else that the human race in absolute emotional state could lead themselves to do. This required a solution masked in the best way possible to ensure no one suspects about it being part of the necessary control mechanisms to keep people at bay. This is how we suddenly had an emergence of alternative movements, activist and protest groups that suddenly got a lot of exposure in the internet, the conventional media and even shown in schools and  universities around the world as new instruments for education – for a moment we thought that the world was going to suddenly become a better place now that ‘the truth was out’ but this didn’t precisely go that way.

 

  • We got to understand and know more about the details of the  fallacy of our money system, the fallacy of the governmental powers, the elites, the bloodlines, the belief systems that we are indoctrinated with in our schooling systems, religions, entertainment, media and the list goes on wherein our entire social construction can be exposed as one huge ‘conspiracy theory’ – yet it is in fact only becoming aware of the basic set-up that has prevailed as the best way to enslave humans with ideals of progress and eventual ‘ideal wealth’ where at the same time,  desires to be liberated/  freed are fed and instilled in people that get emotionally driven to a point of having to Do something about it and not knowing how to direct such impulse.

 

  • The  role of Activism in all its various forms that we will discuss here are ‘doing a great job’ to further entertain all the individuals that hold an actual potential to contribute and develop actual changes in this world, remaining contained advocating ‘solutions’ without any clear direction and funding to do so – furthermore, if the funding exists, one would have to question the absolute integrity  of every single corporation or private investor and disclose their intentions in the long run when dealing with the consent of large groups of individuals motivated with the desire and intent to create changes for the betterment of our lives. Again, no real change in this world at a system level would in fact be getting any funds from any corporation that is currently standing in the name of protecting the system that they have based and created their own wealth upon.  As a secondary point,  you can investigate who funded art movements in the 20th Century in America after the Great Depression and with what political purposes as well – this means that art and ‘freedom movements’ have only been the necessary agitation to maintain people at bay yet with the belief of ‘doing something’ and ‘changing the world’ without practically getting to set the foundation of any real tangible and practical solutions.

 

  • The revelations about the ‘real powers’ that govern our world system created a new breed of social movements united once again by an Experience of ‘wanting change’ and being enraged against a system thanks to visually charged movies that create a new sense of collectivity standing up to change the system, which would be great if they had not been funneled down to ‘solutions’ that propose solutions  by ‘all means but Politics.’ It seems rather foolish that if there was any real ability in such movements to create a legitimate change in the system, they would have been already labeled as terrorists and secluded for attempt and/or confabulation of  treason to their country. However this was not the case – Why? Because it is in the best interest of the government to keep people Occupied trying to ‘change the world’ yelling at buildings, projecting futuristic cities, appealing to the more ‘scientifically inclined’ people as a generation that grew up watching star trek, star wars and reading Ray Bradbury alike. Then we have the groups formed appealing to the conspiracy theorists, the 9/11’s, the esoteric agendas, ancient mysteries and illuminati control exposure along with the Wiki leaks and tin-foil hatters.

 

  • We  have the public protest movements appealing to the guerilla style movements that prefer to blame the corporations, bankers and government officials for the ills in this world. The movements are based on  living in parks in means of protest, flip fingers at the people in financial districts, governmental houses, parliaments or embassies and raging against the machine believing that: ‘united we can create change’ not realizing that they were also being united by a feeling of ‘being right’ to ‘fight for our rights’ but we have forgotten where all our past revolutions have lead to: nothing else but further incorporation of the opposition to engulf the protests and upgrade the system. Even if most ‘public demonstrations’/ protests are meant to be pacific in nature, the end result is always entailing a confrontation with the police and resulting in sever violence. This is where we then can have an escalation to looting, vandalism and further exercises of civil disobedience. These are the ones that demonstrate and create more of that emotional upheaval that is easily mimicked in other cities and countries, which is standing with the belief that demanding en masse creates the necessary pressure to change things. As a personal note, I live in a city where public demonstrations take place every single day, it is clearly not the solution otherwise changes would have already been made, it is not so and it’s been an ongoing problem without any actual solution – why? Because unless we establish change at an economic level, not even yelling at politicians will make a difference to solve the injustices and abuse generated by our current corporate totalitarian capitalistic system.

 

  • Complementary Read:

 

In the Next post we will continue with exposing the Activism of the 21st century and who this ties in with Equal Money and the creation of our movement to create solutions that are established at an individual level while promoting the complete reform of the economic and political system to establishing solutions through democratic means.

 

Damián

 

 

 

  

Blogs:

 

Hear:

Vlogs:


275. Child Addicts: Problem–Solution–Rewards

In the Equal Money Capitalism, we are presenting the current problems that are affecting our society, directing it toward a solution and looking at how we will all be benefited from having a world that stops running in self-abusive, harmful and destructive patterns.

In this blog, we are continuing from the presentation of the problem in the last post 274. Child Drug Addicts – here we are directing the problem toward a solution that invariably generates equal rewards. This means that the same pattern of rehabilitation and solution can be applied to any other country/ population that presents a similar problematic.

Watch the documentary Afghanistan’s Child Drug Addicts in order to become aware of how drug addictions does not only mean ‘wanting to escape’ reality out of fun and having enough money to sponsor your own escapist-habits.

 

  • Problem:

War in Afghanistan  has destroyed the city, many have been killed leaving families without parents to take care of children.

– Males use drugs in order to be able to work longer hours, which means not enough money is made and as such, bring the addictions home and spread even to 1 and a half year old babies.

– Children lose limbs because of the war and have no medicines to cope with the pain, villages are attacked wherein civilians become casualties of war. Parents have no other option but to give them opium to ease the pain, which leads them to become addicts from then on.

 

Psychological Damage: Teenagers suffer from depression because of loss of family members in bombings/ witnessing suicide bombers/ seeing dead people and having to recover from the traumatic experience which means, coping with suicidal tendencies.

– Families torn apart by the wars – hence children as young as 11 years old turn to drugs to cope with reality.

– Children turn to prostitution from the age of 8 years old in order to fund their own addictions – there’s no jobs/ no work.

– The Afghan powder/ heroin is the cheapest in the world here because of drug cartels now turning their poppy harvest into heroin, so it is ubiquitous. One gram is over 1 Pound.

 

– Poverty: High rates of unemployment make of drug addiction the common way of spending time and curbing the need for food.

– Adult population turn heroin addicts in order to cope with a reality where no support is given.

– Children are adopting the patterns of the parents within the consumption of heroin in order to mitigate hunger.

– No health provided, no doctors available, no support on how to deal with child addicts.

– Food is more expensive than opium.

– People would sell drugs to make a decent living, and with the eradication of their plantations, they have no other option but taking drugs due to lacking food.

– Not able to afford medicines, opium is the answer.

Family Crisis: Parents  give opium to their children in order to mitigate hunger

– Half of all opium users give it to their children of which the number is in the rise due to no solutions.

– Other children just become addicts due to the parents’ smoke

– Parents give their children drugs in order to cope with the pain and hunger.

– There’s not enough food to feed the whole family and when smoking opium, they lose the appetite.

Drug Addiction is seen as a dishonor in Islam : leads people to be afraid to ask for support.

– Only one center deals with child addiction in the entire country.

 

Consequences:

– A Generation of Drug addicts is created.

 

  • Solution:

– No more wars in order to obtain resources from other countries

– No more wars against ‘terrorism’ as wars are in itself terrorism

– Changing the harvesting of heroin for money into foods for human consumption. Drug consumption won’t be a necessity if everyone is given equal support.

– Proper living conditions that ensure all people have access to decent jobs such as reconstruction/ building of houses, schools and all the infrastructure that has been destroyed with the wars

– Education to parents in order to take care of their children with proper medical health supervision to not treat any form of ache with opium

– Educating the population about the long term addiction problems that ensue when giving their children opium/ heroin.

– Access to food,  water, sanitation services, education, nutritional and parenting counseling while developing crops to grow actual food and not drugs.

– Rehabilitation programs that are openly supported by the government: no more religious veto toward addictions which means, facing the problem as the national crisis it has become.

– Kids without parents given to proper adoptive ones that will ensure no abuse is committed onto them.

 

  • Rewards: 

– Peace, safety, tranquility for all inhabitants in the world with ceasing fire and all forms of warfare.

-Resources that were directed toward defense against the invasion can now be directed to support the population to get to live in dignified living conditions.

– Healthy living conditions/ environments wherein people can learn how to take care of their children while having access to proper food, water, sanitation, education and practical care considerations to ensure no more addictions are generated due to lack of money.

– Education availability based on self-care, proper nutritional habits and taking care of the environment as well as involving the parents to rebuild the city/ houses given the necessary means to do so.

– An actual historical treasure that this country represents could be open for visits without having tourists fearing to be another causality of war or kidnapped.

– No more child prostitution or drug addiction, no more depression or suicidal bombers – the living conditions given in equality generate a sense of well being within all individuals, ensuring real happiness as an actual possibility that will never again  be silenced by the sound of a bomb.

– Ensuring a generation of human beings that learn the consequences of war and poverty as they are supported to gain stability through communal support toward the reconstruction and rehabilitation of themselves and their environment.

 

Read all about the Equal Money Capitalism here in the Economist’s Journey to Life and the Equal Money System website

Equal Money Capitalism

 

 

 

 

Must Hear Interviews:


266. The Secret behind Addictions

When a problem is not addressed at its root cause, for the human it is the mind for instance in how it functions thought by thought, solutions for human society will not be possible” – Bernard Poolman

 

I watched the discussion/ talk called Brain Development & Addiction with Gabor Mate in order to understand addiction at a chemical level. We are aware the we always seek to ‘feel good’ and this is one aspect that is currently understood in relation to this constant feel-good experiences that are generated by chemical compounds such as opiates and dopamine that are part of the brain circuits wherein impulse control and stress control are also a part of. These basic categorization is what leads us to address the infamous ‘chemical imbalances’ wherein only through these chemical compounds obtained through an induced manner – either through drugs or energetic associations to people/ places/ environments – one is able to experience as sense of fulfillment and enjoyment.

Opiates, according to Dr. Gabor Mate create the experiences of love, connection, reward, pain relief.  Dopamine creates the experience of incentive, motivation, vitality, curiosity and as sense of ‘being alive.’  Thus it is definitely so that these are energetic-experience requirements that are beyond being only brain-sent requirements, there is a much deeper explanation to all of this and it is through understanding how the Quantum Mind operates that we are able to finally understand why we are never in fact ‘stable’ even if we have all the support of the world to live in dignity, because we find rich people also being hooked on drugs and alcohol or any other type of activity that creates a temporary rush. Sure, people living in poverty also use drugs to mitigate hunger and evade a reality that is not ensuring that they get equal support just as anyone else that was born in a family of wealth and social benefits, however we have realized that it is not only money the point that defines the well being of the individual, but also the care and basic forms of parenting that must be understood in order to see from where does this inherent desire to seek for ‘more’ come from.

 

The understanding of how these experiences are created go beyond any current understanding promoted by contemporary science and the reason why is because the mind is not a physical system, but an interdimensional system that is out of sigh for us human beings. This implies the following point: We have become in essence subject to our own mind to use it as a tool to ‘get to know ourselves,’ which is limited to the possibility of only see the consequential outflow as chemicals such as opiates, dopamine, endorphins and any other chemical that are the result of processes that take place beyond any spectrum and understanding of our conscious, subconscious and unconscious mind, but exist within the domain of the Quantum Mind and Quantum Physical.

 

The mind’s relationship to the physical body is not yet a basic understanding that should exist as the foundation of any psychological problematic that we are only attributing to chemical imbalances and treat with drugs that do Not solve the problem, but involve the consumption of chemicals that will artificially sustain this well-being experience through drugs/ medication toward which the ‘patient’ eventually becomes addicted to. And not only the people that take drugs in legal/ illegal manners are drug addicts: we are all essentially on the same boat. We just get our fix through thinking, becoming emotional, thinking positive and all the best feelings in the world, through activities that we have attached to an experience of vitality, liveliness, feeling good, being on ‘top of the world,’ which includes virtually anything that we use to get ourselves to a constant High in the mind – yes, the mind – but, where’s the Physical then?

 

That is precisely the point to walk here: how through the definition of our well being according to who we are as the mind as these temporary fixes of ‘love, connection, happiness, reward, motivation, vitality’ turned to an energetic fix of ‘being alive’ we have neglected in fact how such self-induced experiences operate at a quantum mind level which means, beyond any form of current mind-awareness that we could gather from self-investigation with our own pair of eyes. Yes, we are talking about interdimensional support and assistance through the Portal at Desteni through which the most advanced mind-technology investigation is being presented in all the current series that are finally allowing us to understand our entire relationship of who we are as the mind toward our physical reality. Quantum Mind Self Awareness Series as well as Quantum Systemization are key points of study for anyone that is willing to go beyond ‘chemical imbalances’ to understand the constant necessary feel-good experiences at a mind level, while neglecting how the mind uses/ consumes the physical body/ flesh/ tissue in order to generate such ‘feel good’ experiences, because the quantum mind as a system of energy will use any form of thought process to associate to an either positive or negative experience to cause friction and conflict which is what generates enough ripple effects that the mind is able to generate within the physical tissue/ flesh of the physical human body in order to ‘power up’ these thoughts, feelings and emotions that we believe is ‘who we are’ and we end up building our entire lives and make decisions according to these basic energetic experiences that we blindly follow as ‘who we are.’

To read more about this, I suggest reading the past entries that explain from various angles this basic mechanism of how the mind operates within the physical body and why following a ‘feel good’ mentality is causing us the current depletion and neglect of the physical world in the name of our personal stability At a Mind-Level.

 

Continuing from:

220. Drug Culture: Mad Society as a Lifestyle

 

 

An actual Sound and Stable Solution that we are able to propitiate/ give to ourselves by the mere fact of being a living-breathing being, is through equal and one self support in a global social, economical and political system that ensures we all get equal support to live in the best conditions possible and sustainable in this world. For that, the entire system must be changed, because our system is the result of having sought for these never-quenching experiences of ‘having more’ / being happy/ obtaining power through money that has become our own demise as we realize it is unsustainable to continue giving all our ‘power’ to sustain a system of abuse – and this same system is the one that runs in an exact and equal manner within ourselves as the constant strive for ‘feeling good’ that we create at a mind level, then seeking to satisfy ourselves in any way we can, even if that implies abusing ourselves, which is how it has worked thus far.

 

Thus, the experiences that we can all define would be best for all as these ‘brain circuits’ that Dr. Gabor Mate describes can be and become a living-physical expression if we decide to implement a system that can ensure that all kids are born in families where every individual will be qualified to give birth to another life/ child, ensuring everyone has equal support through money that ensures health care, proper nutrition and infrastructure – shelter, food, sanitation, water, clothing – as well as parental education is in place to create a suitable environment for children to be born into this world – and I quote Economist’s Journey to Life here: Equal Money Capitalism – Preparing the Road for Change:

“CHILDREN

When a child is born, the parents’ company/companies will allocate an equal profit share for the child – which will be added to the parent’s profit share. Every parent will have a company – because everyone will be employed.”
http://economistjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/12/day-164-equal-money-capitalism.html

 

“The government only represent the same controls we allow within the mind and is thus an externalization of the inner world of the people. That is why Government acts in ways that are seemingly strange, yet it is what the people actually want to remain in the inner world of self deception and self interest. This will be a most difficult journey to change our world to what is best for all–which must include Government as some level of universal management is required to have some freedom for all. The problem is not addressed at the mind level where it exist as each one attempts to protect their mind, thoughts and feelings as if it is sacred, without understanding how it is created” – Bernard Poolman 

 

This single basic certainty of self support ensures that parents have No worries, No stress to give birth to a child, this ensures that people will be able to spend quality time with their babies in a world wherein everyone will be equally stable and confident, since everyone will have all that is required to live. This creates a sense of well being within the progenitors that will define the stability and condition of the new baby in order to grow in a sound and self-supportive environment, immediately becoming used to living as a physical being that is whole, here, complete instead of a baby that picks up the current worry, concern and stress that people have due to debt, lack of money/ resources, lack of education of how to take care of a newborn, having relationship problems, addictions, manias and a total ‘flawed nature’ that is the reflection of who we have accepted and allowed ourselves to be in the mind, which is creating what this entire world currently Is and exists as. This is in conjunction to what Dr. Mate explains as the negative effects that lacking an ‘available, non stressed nurturing emotionally available parenting care giver’ creates as potential addicts that seek to activate these basic experiences of completion through chemically induced experiences, while they could have been developed as a natural physical experience that is not constantly sought as an Energetic experience, but are simply not sought since the same stability that equal support provides will ensure who we are as the mind is no longer seeking for this never ending desire for ‘more.’ We are all addicts, we have said that before – so we rather stop condemning  ourselves, take responsibility and create solutions at a world-system level, not through medications or street drugs that lead to harm and self abuse.

 

So, if we only allow sound stable parents to have children, all the ‘future of the world’ will ensure to continue this living stability as they know nothing else but that: stability, cooperation, care, support, consideration, empathy, compassion, all of which ensures that life is then actually lived and not survived in this world, and this is what common sense is all about: implementing what’s Best for All through preventing addictions and mind-fixes that lead to self destruction.

 

Through this unconditional support, love, connection, reward, incentives, motivation, vitality, curiosity, a sense of being alive and ways to cope with stress won’t exist as some chemical sought in drugs, people, places, activities that we associate positive experiences to in our minds, but we will rather understand how Not to participate in a mind that will constantly seek for a ‘fix’ to continue its survival as a parasitical system within ourselves that we have been mostly unaware of in terms of how it functions, we have only seen the consequences but Never understood the mechanisms and that is why and how Desteni and all the interview series at Eqafe are of vital study for any human being that is willing to finally discover the ‘missing pieces of the puzzle’ in terms of addictions and any other psychological and reality-functioning aspect that has never quite ‘fit’ in all the vast theories and studies proposed by our most laureate scientists, because no one until now had been able to see the exact mechanisms and functions of the Quantum Mind in the physical body interdimensionally.

 

This is ground breaking information that Must be studied in order to take responsibility for our own addictions, to understand the problem is to get half of the solution in place, the second half is implementing it and that begins with and within ourselves through walking a process of Self Support in order to stand equal and one to the mind that we have defined as ‘the problem,’ simply because of not understanding who we really are and what we are in relation to the mind, how the mind operates interdimensionally upon the physical body and what we can do to practically stop such self-abuse and support ourselves to become living beings:

 

Equal Money System – The economic, political and social revolution that will ensure all living beings are born in a self-supportive environment where no more lack of money, care and stress result in needy human beings seeking for a fulfillment through addictive chemical substances – we instead Prevent the problem through presenting the cure and solution: Living Life As the Physical Body and Stopping Participation in the Mind as who we are – but for that, a Process is walked:

Desteni I Process

Desteni Lite Process – Basic steps to get to know yourself as your mind

Desteni Forum To read all the self support through various processes of self correction in relation to the mind

 

 

Blogs:

 

Interviews/ Basic Self Education about the mind, the physical body and world system:


257. A Piece of Heaven at the Expense of Life

Why do people turn to drugs? There is a definitive reason that cause all the dimensions that play a role  in our current Drug Culture as either cause/effect,  but a common thing is definitely the root and cause of WHY people turn to drugs. We all know the usual things, for example: to escape from oneself, to hide, to run away from the mind, to stop the abhorrent self-experience, to avoid taking responsibility for one’s life and relationships, self-loathing, etc. – but, have we asked why do we have these problems? One can say: family problems, relationship problems, issues with one’s ‘flawed self,’ physical issues, lack of self esteem, heritage, cultural trends, traditions, religions, survivalism in clans/ mafias/ brotherhoods, spiritual beliefs, shamanism, environmental contingencies, availability of narcotics due to associations/ alliances, legal drugs due to psychological conditions, and the list may go on – However, behind all of this one must see one common thing: human conditions that have lead to all of these problems/ issues/ separations and sectarianism that stems from a basic problem in our society: a lack of support for all living beings to have a dignified living that creates a proper environmental condition where All beings would be able to live without having to worry about not making it through the next day, not having to tolerate the injustice and abuse that is accepted and allowed within a system that only caters for some– that’s it. 

 

And that’s what we know in common sense and what can also be watched in all the various documentaries* about drugs that are affecting our societies wherein there is simply an absolute boredom, menial jobs for the working class – or no job opportunities at all – and a general dissociation from wanting to have anything to do with a ‘shitty world/ shitty system that doesn’t give a fuck about life!’ hence turning to have an alternate reality where ‘everything is fine, a heaven in one’s mind for a moment, a harmful  momentary high that turns into a lethal habit that leads to a living condition that is mostly deplorable in most of the cases, as well as leading to any other ‘sudden deaths’ out of the usual ODs and other negligence  that stems from lacking any form of precaution when ingesting/ inhaling/injecting/smoking a drug. It is even common to have people that do this on a regular basis become ‘icons’ in our society, our ‘role models’ which can already point out what type of ‘human quality’ we’ve become fanatics of.

 

It is also interesting how drug-culture became mainstream to a point now wherein one can watch a “music video” and there’s people smoking weed, one can watch a movie and get all the specifics on how people shoot themselves heroin and even all the withdrawal processes in a explicit manner, like in Trainspotting which is probably one of the most popular and obliged reference about drugs for many people that even learned how to do drugs through watching the movie.  I will tell more about that in following posts.

 

The reason why this is an important topic is because drugs as any other form of escapism, represents the aspect we hold on to the most, as it is a self-created intricate relationship we form with only Experience as an Energetic physical experience induced by chemicals in the physical body – the reason why I find it so important to expose is because it’s ubiquitous nowadays for people to be aware of all types of drugs and ways to get high or even self-harm to get a moment of absolute adrenaline –rush/drug of the mind . That’s becoming a children’s game  and I’m referring to what I became aware of today as the salt and ice challenge – I mean, this is how kids age 10 or even less can get used to having a way to get this absolute pain and fear that are the most ‘powerful’ self-experiences created at a mind level when inducing pain along with the ‘challenge’ aspect – where kids will mostly broadcast themselves doing so to ‘prove’ to others they are able to ‘handle it,’ and what mostly happens is kids then will turn to seek for more ‘intense experiences’ like that. Even our words and vocabulary is pointing out blatantly what it is that we are inducing within ourselves: that was Intense! all energy based, and if you’ve been reading these series, you would be aware by now of how energy operates within the physical body through consciousness as a system that we believe is ‘who we really are,’ which is comprised of all our thoughts, emotions and feelings that we whole-heartedly have believed is ‘what living is for’ and if not.

 

This Grave mistake of identifying ourselves with all the drama, excitement and high-intensity of any self-experience is what is mostly leading us to an actual death wherein we disregard actual life/living just for a ‘little piece of heaven.’

And this is what’s leading humanity to a certain end if a single pattern of addiction continues without any definitive decision to STOP.

 

Please read the series to catch up to this point:

220. Drug Culture: Mad Society as a Lifestyle

 

 

I had made a pause in these series due to the impending ‘doomsday’ that I decided to write about due to my inherent responsibility in having participated pretty much in that type of doom-mentality or gloomy-self-experience as we’ve called it – and what is left is pretty much ourselves, having to face what we have become and as such, take the wheel of our reality in all levels, in all ways and have a look at how we’ve become what we’ve become, which is also another form of escapism through the mind to evade the responsibility we all have here.

 

Drug Culture is quite a common topic virtually everywhere in the world, no matter if it’s a high-energy-hyped society like many places in Europe and America or a third world/ poor country in Africa, or under developed regions like South America – everyone’s got the same ‘epidemic’ which is drugs which includes alcoholism as main problems that maim  the ability for any being to realize and take self responsibility, because drugs imply one single point: a giving up experience that is now turned into an addiction, a need, a fascination and obsession wherein people are literally willing to give all their money, all their life just for one single initial ‘rush’ that any drug can give them. While observing this, it is impossible to not create a parallel to what we understand now of how the mind works, wherein we create our own fixations in order to fuel and satisfy this idea of ourselves that we’ve simply copied, absorbed and ‘become/ embodied’ without a question, and that includes addictive patterns of seeking this ‘greatness’ as an energetic experience that is able to be obtained with drugs, pretty much flushing your entire life down the toilette for a single self belief of you being ‘perfectly fine/ in control / able to quit any time and all of the people that have been severely enrolled in hardcore addictions mostly find it very hard if not impossible to actually live out that belief of being able to stop and quit at any time.

 

That is One single dimension of the addiction: the energetic experience that we are familiar with the moment we accept emotions and feelings as ‘who we are’ and what drugs do is an overall enhancement of this relationship within the ‘who we are’ as the mind, which implies that we are completely hooked on absolute self abuse, since any energetic experience  – as anything that requires energy – is not ‘for free,’ it is an actual process of consumption of the very physical tissue/ fabric that provides the necessary resources for any drug to function properly – this is why the deterioration of the physical takes place in drug addicts/ consumers – among other various dimensions that involve the living conditions that hard-core long-time addicts end up living in or are born in, which is also another aspect that leads to drugs – all in all: stems from lacking actual living support in all ways to live in a sound and healthy environment where life could be actually honored = hence it is a matter of Collective Responsibility, since we are all responsible for continuing fueling a system that is not providing a sound environment for us to develop our expression to our utmost potential.

 

The purpose of these blogs will be to point out main factors that lead to drug consumption, the reasons behind that and how to support oneself to Prevent drug-addictions, referencing the usual ways in which one picks up this belief of drugs being the ‘greatest thing ever’ as well as gathering enough strength to realize there IS a solution to this world, there IS a way to support ourselves to stop seeking to ESCape from reality and instead, sober up and stand up to support the actual change we all dreamed of, it’s in our hands, so we must clean our act before we can establish ourselves in the actual world we have all wanted to live in, and within this, also paving the way for the children to come and ensure they do have the absolute opportunities  to Live and express themselves, and never again resort to any form of escapism through the mind to manifest a self-abusive ‘heaven’ in the mind.

 

Erroneously – those that Profess to be ‘Souls’, will Claim that the Body of Flesh is a temporary Illusion. And they would base it on the Experience they Generate through Mind Systems, which Follows the Design of the System where: the Search for Meaning and Reason, would Follow through the Combination of Predesigned Platonic Solids as Key Parts to Systems that produce Energy and Visual Input which the Person Align with, So Intensely that they Believe that it is Real, and they Disregard the Simple Reality of a Breath and Food and Bodily Functions that Keeps them Alive.
In this, these ‘Souls’ End-up Acting like Vampires in the Physical Reality, Seeking to Consume everything in their Path for the Self-Interest of the ‘Feeling’ that Produce, according to them, the ‘Experience of Happiness’. The fact that this ‘Happiness’ is Produced at the Cost of the Suffering of Uncountable Living Beings – Simply is Ignored or Seen as ‘Collateral Damage’ of an Illusion that will ‘Suddenly, Magically’ Disappear.”  – Bernard Poolman +

 

Self Support to Begin your Journey to Life is Here:

 

Blogs:

 

Interviews:

 

Documentaries/ Videos suggested that present the context of what Drug Culture implies– Viewers discretion suggested: NSFW


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