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498. Deconstructing the Default Self-Specialness

Continuing from the previous blog

Here sharing Self-Forgiveness on the points I am committing myself to acknowledge as my creation, as my allowed participation in my mind that I want to change and turn into a supportive outcome for myself and the people I get to be involved with for a moment or for a lifetime.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to develop a positive experience in relation to people with whom I have developed a relationship where there is kindness but at the same time there’s the awareness of them being ‘attending me’ as in being there to assist me, to care after me and getting what I am looking for in the shop – or simply having a chat in the meantime – wherein when I see that another person comes into the shop and the attention veers toward that other person, I have allowed myself to instantly go into a ‘lesser’ experience of myself which I’ve felt in my physical body as a tightness, a tension directly related to the presence of the other person, instead of realizing that this is the ‘default’ experience of ourselves at a mind level where I constantly can perceive myself as ‘special’ or ‘unique’ or ‘having a special spot’ yet forgetting that this is the default experience that we all have allowed ourselves when in our minds, therefore

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be in my mind reacting to another person’s presence and in doing so perceiving it as a diversion of attention from others towards them – instead of remaining attending ‘me’, which is very much an egotistical experience where I stop considering another person in that moment and go into this tension and frigidity in that moment, which I’ve come to see is me in my body and mind conditioning myself to create a momentary friction and conflict about the presence of another person, instead of embracing the presence of not only one person but any other person around me, realizing their equal ability to get the attention from the shop attendants and at the same time push myself to be able to look at them, interact with them if the opportunity arises and in doing so, practically walk through my initial tension or subtle reaction to another’s presence.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a positive experience in shops or other public spaces wherein there is supposed to be people ‘attending me’ and I get all the attention I require, and go into a subtle ‘low’ if the attention is given to someone else, which is very much also a programming I’d see as very common in me since being a little child, the youngest of the family, where I got all the attention and was quite spoiled in my own way, which led me to constantly add this ‘specialness’ to myself, who I am, what I do and if there’s someone else taking that one ‘special spot’ in whichever context, I then have allowed myself to go into a ‘low’ which is simply a perception of ‘me not getting all the attention’, but in common sense that’s how things should be and all that I require to do is to learn now to embrace any other person as an equal to myself, walk through my initial ‘discomfort’ toward them, understanding them as a ‘default’ reaction of myself in my mind-and-body so that I can then proceed to live the words of integrity and integration, embracing and equality towards others at any given time.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react in that ‘sinking’ experience within me upon noticing it was another young woman entering the shop and in that moment the activation of ‘women competition’ kicked in, in a very subtle manner wherein even if I am not thinking in competition terms, the tension, the discomfort that I experienced as taking over my physical body’s upper area is an indication that I am still reacting to the presence not only of other human beings in certain contexts, but specifically women where I then proceeded to feel ‘displaced’ in that moment where the conversation went towards here, wherein I went into a low and self-diminishment in that moment, which I saw and pushed through to remain in my usual presence, however the experience had already been developed, therefore

Whenever I am in any situation where I perceive that I am ‘alone’ and the attention is only ‘on me’ and I am creating a positive experience about it, I have to slow myself down to ensure that I am not going into a ‘high’ within me as the positive experience that can then rebound to a ‘low’ if the factors change in the moment and I stop getting ‘all the attention’ on me, because this then signifies that my interaction wasn’t entirely being in equality, in stability and comfort, because if it went into a ‘low’ all of a sudden, there had to be a pre-existent experience I was aware of.

So I can now practice this point where I can in those moments upon hearing or seeing that another person is also sharing that moment and ‘space’ in a shop or other place in a similar set up, I can breathe as a way to ensure that I am relaxed in my body and prevent through breathing the build-up of tension in my upper body, while I can deliberately remind myself to live the words embrace, equality, integration so as to ‘integrate’ the other people into the space as equals and embrace them, their expression in a way where I can be in their presence and remain comfortably in my body and even if the opportunity is there, proceed to interact and engage with them and have a chat if they also respond back in an equally open manner.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think, believe or perceive that there are such things as a ‘position’ of specialness and favoritism toward people wherein I have to let go of reassuring these ‘positions’ in my mind that I believe others have toward me and instead, fully develop my positioning as an equal in all aspects, which I recognize I’ve been doing better when it comes to supposed ‘hierarchical’ situations and learning to get past my elitist programming towards ‘others’ but I can still see this ‘regard’ that I’ve built towards myself in relation to how I expect to be treated as a signal that I have yet to completely let go of any default-specialness of my mind, any default ‘uniqueness’ and this can be practiced by focusing on breathing, stopping the insta-judgments of values based on appearance overall, based on gender, based on money, based on ‘positioning’ and in doing so, become the person that I want to be that truly embodies what it means to be equal to any other individual, where I don’t recreate the separations, the discriminations, the divisions that we’ve fueled in our minds based on a plethora of visual differences that are only that, a visual presentation but instead, learn to get to know each other as the words we speak and live, what we embody as ourselves because that’s where the real presence and essence of each other is.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to still carry on with a subtle, unspoken or ‘without thinking’ comparison or even rivalry towards other women specifically wherein I am the one that is instantaneously judging them as ‘more than me’ based on certain attitudes or physical appearance wherein I am completely becoming me as my mind that judges, that values appearances, that compares and creates a verdict of me being more than or less than others… none of this is who I really want to be in those moments because it only recreates the plethora of separations that we are seeing more and more prominently in our world.

Therefore I have to practice letting go of my ‘inertia’ to these ‘quantum-judgments’ and assessments that I get to become aware of only after they have happened in an almost ‘automated’ mode, but even that, I challenge myself to be able to stop this very silent, very physically ingrained habit of comparing, judging or going into a silent rivalry/competition toward other women that I’ve perceived as ‘more’ than myself, which only exists there if I am still regarding myself as ‘inferior’ in one way or another.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to from a very age not know ‘what to do’ upon noticing distinctive physical features and appearances of people around me wherein I learned to create notions of beauty based on appearance and particular traits, but wasn’t really aware how to actually create a meaning that is substantial for real beauty in a person, which I’ve established that is not limited to only the first layer we get to see through our eyes in one person, because that is definitely something that we can all see and sometimes even agree upon by default – but also to include the essence, presence and substance of a person, who they are as the words they live and speak, the kind of being they are in their lives which is what I’d like not only myself but more and more humans to focus on at the same time, because I’ve complained myself many times of living in a ‘shallow world’ where only appearances matter, but the aspect of the substance behind that first-impression appearance is what I’d like to focus on and get to know in a person, to then learn from them, get to embrace them as a being more than just an image, because I, myself, would not like to be diminished to only being an image either.

I commit myself to practice in those moments when acknowledging the presence of another person through hearing them coming in, to instead of ‘avoiding looking at them’ which is not done out of privacy or consideration, but out of avoidance as a reaction to see them with my eyes, I can then test out actually turning my head and looking at them so that I can make the decision to in that moment apply these words: embracing, integration, equality and so direct myself to focus on my own physical presence, my own body, ensuring I am not going into a tension and if that happens, I can simply focus on breathing so that I can dissipate the experience before it builds up at all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to without intent and in a perception of ‘respecting others’ privacy’ – apparently – have done onto others what I dislike being done onto me, which is that of deliberately ignoring another’s presence yet only reacting at a physical level about their presence, which is very uncool and I simply do not want to be that kind of person that eventually gets to a point of looking away from people on purpose so as to not have to face the various reactions that could be coming up in those moments. I rather learn to face and embrace the reactions and comparisons I’ve created so that I can work on them first hand and practice, practice, practice as much as it is needed until the presence of another human being – male or female- becomes indistinct to myself, to the moment and can instead practice to embrace them, integrate with them in the moment because that’s exactly what I’ve liked others doing onto me and I am aware first hand of how cool that is for all of us, so I definitely want to be entirely clear within me in relation to people, especially considering those ‘first ever’ encounters where I don’t even know the person, yet I am ‘reacting’ to them? Doesn’t make any sense, really, and that’s what we are and have become in our minds: separation, not making any sense and simply causing friction and conflict by default, but now it’s entirely up to me to stand as the directive principle of myself in my mind and my body so that I can then decide who I am in that moment.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have fueled in a very subtle manner this idea that I am ‘special’ and I deserve some kind of ‘special treatment’ wherein I believe that I am a person that ‘deserves’ something based on what I give, which should not be the case at all, because any kindness and consideration toward others is me giving it as an expression of myself, not as an ‘expected in return’ type of treatment which would only create the same kind of societies where we treat each other as walking numbers or assets, instead of redefining that value as the kind of person we are, the words we live, the actions we stand by and what we use our bodies, our minds, our words for.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed this ‘default’ existence of myself in this ‘special-mode’ self-experience wherein then it is easier to create any sort of inner-conflict and go into an inferiority-mode because we are the ones sustaining that ‘elevated’ sense of self that can be easily threatened and rocked when perceiving anything or anyone as ‘more than’ something that we are defining ourselves by as a judgment or a value, therefore this proves that any superiority or inferiority complex are nothing more than judgments, values and perceptions that I’ve accepted and allowed as ‘who I am’ which in turn, through this identification, becomes a way for me to react to certain people – or not – based on this default programming of ‘my identity’ being those experiences, those reactions, that superior or inferior experience which is by all means something that I commit myself to stop fueling even in the silent and most subtle physical experiences that I can instead open up, face, investigate for myself and turn this whole comparison and competition mode into a supportive outcome for myself and so for others.

I forgive myself that I have lived a contradiction in terms of wanting to stand as equal to every other person, but still create these comparisons, judgments, notions of value and worth towards others and seeing them as either ‘more’ or ‘less than’ myself, wherein I am in fact even in a silent manner, recreating the same mentality with which we’ve built this current world system, and I know for a fact It doesn’t serve life, it doesn’t have a default space for equality as life, therefore I/we have to be the people that can change our ways of interacting among each other if we truly want to create a world in equality.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create an expectation upon meeting people for the first time of creating an impression upon them of ‘me being unique and special’ wherein I am by default wanting to be the ‘attention grabber’ that wants to make an impression but not yet for all the best reasons, but still coming through with some ego, therefore I have to be more aware of my choice of words, attitudes, expression in general ensuring that it is not being done from the starting point of continuing and feeding this ‘attention seeker’ or ‘attention grabber’ in me, and instead develop humbleness as a modest self that I can live with and stand by eternally as who I am, because it won’t be defined by highs or lows of energy, but instead expressing and allowing the real me to come through as a presence that I can definitely see is possible to continue developing, growing and expanding as myself in more moments of my reality.

I realize It is a matter of being aware of myself at a physical level, being aware of the subtle changes experienced at a physical level as sudden undercurrents that come up and transform into tensions or stiffness and in that moment investigate, look at what’s the programming that’s being triggered and so proceed to apply the words that I see would be most supportive in that moment.

This way, the practical application is an opportunity that exists whenever and wherever I see myself with more people in a context where I have created a ‘positive relationship’ towards something or someone and in that, making sure that I can ‘share’ that something or someone with others without reinforcing a sense of ownership or dominion over others, because that’s certainly not what I want to be and do, I want to stand in humbleness and equal-stance toward others, as well as letting go of notions of specialness or positivity attached to people, places or situations so that no matter where I am, I am here, I am expressing me without ‘highs or lows’ but practicing a continuous embracing of others in the space around me, and also get to chat with them or get to know them better as part of our shared moment and reality, no matter how short or long it might be.

Thanks for reading

 

Silent Interplays

 

Join us in our process of Self-Awareness as LIFE


298. Accumulating Consequence through Capital Accumulation

Continuing with:

Redefining Capitalism:

We’re going word by word in a very basic definition of Capitalism to redefine it, explore it and see what each word means and how we are able to re-direct every aspect of this collective agreement into a Best for All system.

Capitalism is an economic system that is based on private ownership of capital goods and the means of production, and the creation of goods and services for profit.[1][2] Elements central to capitalism include capital accumulation,competitive markets, and a price system.[3]

source: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Capitalism

 

 

capital accumulation

The accumulation of capital is the gathering or amassing of objects of value; the increase in wealth through concentration; or the creation of wealth. Capital is money or a financial asset invested for the purpose of making more money (whether in the form of profit, rent, interest, royalties, capital gain or some other kind of return.)This activity forms the basis of the economic system of capitalism, where economic activity is structured around the accumulation of capital (investment in order to realize a financial profit).

Human capital may also be seen as a form of capital: investment in one’s personal abilities, such as through education, to improve their function and therefore increase their income potential in a market economy.

 

Along with the ability to Profit comes the ability to concentrate such wealth and reproduce it, wherein the mere ownership of capital goods, means of production or capital in itself – sheer money – allows you to grow your already existent wealth, just because You Own it. This is how the Delusion of Ownership is quite the key problem here, since power will seek to expand itself and because we currently have the necessary policies to do so legally and have made it acceptable, our world that is life in itself, has been turned into a mere commodity that is diminished to a series of numbers that enable some people to have a ‘great life’ at the expense of a majority that lives like a slave, producing/working and doing that which others – the ones with all the money -will sell and benefit from, who also happen to set the rules of the game and the prices in a convenient manner.

 

I remember growing up in this country which I thought to be the most corrupt one in the world and would get pissed off at a very early age about how no one seemed to care to do things properly, to follow the rules, to be a good citizen – it all boiled down to us having corrupted governors and as such we would allow each other such corruption within ourselves, in our day to day living and believing that only if we cheat, we succeed, which is a well known saying as well.

 

We had discussed in the entry 295. Human Desire: Profitable Drive for Slavery how we have based our entire system in a series of predictable drives such as human’s desire to be fulfilled, satisfied, comforted, have a ‘good feeling’ which i s what is programmed at the tender age of 0-7 years of age and what we get, is certainly an ensured society that is reduced to a target-market by those that have the necessary means to produce a need, promote/advertise the solution/ the remedy and as such, ensure a life-long clientele that will be driven by the need to have these ‘good feeling’ experiences linked to sounds, pictures, words, symbols that affect who we are as the relationships we establish with our world and become our driving-factors without them even being aware of it at a conscious level. This is what we have accepted and allowed as mind control.

 

When we look at the accumulation of wealth it is precisely this mechanism that enables the world of the riches go round, because their wealth is made out of all the times that we didn’t distribute profit equally. Then, life is made a  ‘struggle’ and something you have to ‘fight for’ while forgetting that what we are consuming and backing our money with  is of the Earth’s resources and Human Work and no one should have a legitimate right to Own it to further a means to create More money to enslave other fellow living beings.  The solutions to stop Profiting were placed in the previous entry 296. Profit in Equal Money Capitalism. What we have to focus now is precisely tackling the delirium that we’ve created within this ability to profit, which is accumulating money/capital called wealth and made the ‘ultimate goal’ equated to the sense of happiness and fulfillment, all of it a lie, of course, because the Lie in itself has been the belief that we become ‘More’ if we generate more money and linking ‘the Kingdom of God’ to material possessions.

 

This is where the actual Self-Correction takes place. As we have explained many times, we can set the rules, the most perfect viable solution to ensure that No accumulation of wealth takes place, that no unjust and abusive profiting takes place and that all resources are distributed in an equal manner – but, if the individual does not realize the effect of a single acceptance of ‘wealth’ as a point of being able to earn more than others At their expense – which means: not sharing with them what corresponds to them as  part of their profit-share – and see what such allowance of a Desire to be More creates at a global level, we will have to go through a point of loss in order to realize how money in itself is not ‘the power’ but the resources that back it up, the people that work the land and that make the system functional – and this implies that any form of gold or any believed standard is irrelevant when economy should have always been about managing the Earth’s resources, the retribution of work to all human beings and Not creating rules and regulations to cover up/ manage and create policies that care after people’s amount of fictional wealth. 

 

This also means that people with the most money are dependent on their money and as such they are not really free and this should be grasped to understand that we have all enslaved each other no matter what type of advantage is currently perceived, because even if someone has the ability to make money out of the money that is already available to them according to their context – family/heritage, nation-  what such human beings are taught to do is to reproduce their wealth, to continue accumulating in order to remain in ‘power,’ which is the ability to make decisions and rules that will not benefit the ‘greater good’ but a small sector that act in a very cunning way, using all means that are programmable to the human mind for the majority to accept the fact that ‘there will always be someone above us’ and as such, imprinting the necessary fear to Never challenge this accumulation of wealth and the deceptive/ abusive means to generate it.

 

This taps into one single aspect that has been ingrained as part of our Consciousness: the human purpose to ‘conquer the world’ and have a meaning beyond what we already are, wanting to make Life More than what it is, all because of accepting and allowing ourselves to be defined by our material possessions and the energetic experiences that we’ve linked to that which we buy with money as something that makes us Happy and Secure and Fulfilled, just like we felt in our mother’s womb. The problem is when we’ve attempted to recreate it without really caring who one has to ‘step over’ just to get things working our way, but this way has been made a reliable program that makes the same system of inequality function in a ‘legal manner.’ It’s interesting that we seek change to come from the outside, without realizing how it’s been ourselves as individuals striving for specialness, power and wealth that re-create the system we complain about, which is in essence a collective agreement to lie, deceive and cheat to get ahead in the game, and this is ‘how things work’ without anyone complaining. This prevents any form of real growth within our human civilization, any real education because all education will be veered o maintain the same status quo and this is what is leading us to the brink of our own self-destruction, since such ‘power’ is only founded upon abuse by these flawed mechanism to accumulate Wealth without any form of integrity to ponder how we can manage to have all of this ‘well being’ for a few and allowing others to still starve, have no toilets, running water, education or health care.

 

Thus, our responsibility is Collective: we cannot blame only ‘those’ that are able to accumulate capital as a means to engross their wealth, but we have all collective agreed on such mechanisms and continue doing so without any further question. This is what We must change: not through protests, not through further compliance but developing and proposing a new way to do politics:

Equal Money Capitalism

 

to be continued…

The Solution: Equal Growth for Every One

Equal Growth -Steady Economy - Equal Money

 

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