Tag Archives: fears

370. Desteni Insider: God, Spirituality, the Afterlife

 

Coming to the realization that who we are in this world is not working to create a better world made me seek answers to try and make sense/justify the suffering, poverty, wars, corruption, a lack of consideration to one another that I used as an excuse to remain only within a persistent process of questioning reality beyond what one is taught in school. I grew up being influenced by the ideas of there being ‘Life after Death’ and the dead coming through channelers or mediums to tell their ‘loved ones’ how they were alright and how everything was going to be ‘just fine’ for them. But also there were messages coming from a form of ‘brotherhood’ from which myself and my family would be getting all sorts of apparent protections and blessings in order to ‘do well’ in our lives. I kept questioning who exactly these individuals were and why in spite of them seeing the people that were seeking for help – being mostly desperately seeking money – was there no divine intervention to support them and end the suffering, end world hunger or even better: establish Heaven on Earth. All that was shared between these spiritual people were nice messages that gave hope and reinforced any kind of faith that would keep everyone waiting and expecting things turning out to their favor as a sign that this ‘god’ or ‘spiritual beings’ actually existed and were in fact on our side,  taking care of ourselves and solving whichever mundane troubled situation we were stuck in. Yet all of this seemed too staged, too dogmatic since it wasn’t something one could openly discuss due to the entire atmosphere of secrecy and reverence that existed whenever these beings would speak through the channelers/mediums that could only speak for a short period of time.

 

I was then familiar with the existence of a heaven or a spiritual realm beyond the Earth plane where the dead would go, yet we never got any answers as to why the world was in the verge of destruction and why us human beings kept existing in these ‘lessons to be learned’ somehow always yearning for a better living condition (translated to having money to live well and in peace) – these and many other questions were not allowed, it seemed that all that really mattered were our personal queries of any form of personal relationship gone wrong, or money problem which, if resolved, would only confirm our trust on these individuals within the belief that somehow we were being ‘chosen ones’ or ‘special’ for having this kind of contacts. It seemed unfair to me since I knew that everyone in the world could benefit the same way we were – apparently – yet others didn’t seem to agree since I had to keep it a secret throughout my entire life.

 

When watching Sunette Spies as a portal in the Desteni videos that were being broadcasted on YouTube since 2007, the in breath and out breath wasn’t anything unusual or weird to me, I instead thought I knew what was going on: I immediately assumed and believed she was a channeler/ a medium like any of the other beings I had witnessed throughout my life – yet there were significant changes that made me ponder ‘what kind of brotherhood/beings were these’ because the message somehow was quite straight, direct, there were no staged words or fancy presentations charged with the usual key words that the other beings I had witnessed before would express themselves with.  I started questioning more and comparing the Desteni Message to what I had heard before from what I believed were the same kind of beings: how come these beings speaking through Sunette were speaking as any regular person? How come they would be speaking about there being No God and reptilian beings having created the human being? Why were they not just leaving with some message of hope and ‘goodness’ rectifying that god is with us? Instead the reptilian point was opened which wasn’t any longer a mystery to me since I had also done a brief investigation on the subject prior to Desteni. Everything I thought I knew about channelers/mediums was debunked when I got to watch the video and read the articles related to channeling (Kryon – Pre-programmed Channels, Questions and Perspectives: Unconscious Mind Pre-programmed Channels, Questions and Perspectives: Continued pre-programmed Channels , Questions and Perspectives: Oneness and Equality with regards to ‘Channelings’ , Questions and Perspectives: How was psychics and channels controlled and why? , 2007 History of Mankind – Part 16 – Anu’s Plan – YouTube) explaining why it was also part of the program and why all forms of ‘light beings’ were part of the deception on Earth to keep individuals trapped in the belief that somehow, there was a benevolent god, that love was the way and that we only had to continue aspiring to have some manifestation of the divine through thinking positive or asking things to the universe. All of this was the real scam and later on understood as the cult of money that it has become nowadays (Read: Day 450: The Power of Now Illuminated)

 

So continuing with the previous post 369. Desteni: An Insider’s Report what I came to realize is that everything was in fact a preprogrammed and predesigned reality construct that we have been living in wherein even the higher beings, the gods, the ‘supreme energies’ that I had placed any form of belief upon were in fact also part of the reality design that we have all been participating in within our minds and in absolute separation of the reality that was certainly existing in complete dissonance to all the benevolent words we would get within the New Age culture – all of this was perfectly schemed as part of the diversion to never get to question ‘God’s creation’ and the beliefs we have acquired through familial and cultural tradition, all being part of the necessary programs that we have within and existing as Mind Consciousness Systems. This is when the point of enslavement was understood. I grasped how perfect the plan had been wherein everything in this world was in reverse and every single aspect of who we have believed ourselves to be as human beings in terms of the spiritual endeavors, seeking gods, bonding ourselves within religions, seeking eternal life, seeking the philosopher’s stone had been nothing else but a nice game that we blindly followed, never ever questioning why is it that we only sought our personal enlightenment, happiness and comfort? Why were we just expecting some god to do the work for us, or have these ‘special connections with a higher force’ while the rest of the world was submerged in suffering and agony due to lacking the necessary means to live which is the same as: lacking sufficient money to live; furthermore, why were all of these people suffering absolutely unaware that there were apparently some spiritual beings that could grant them healings and protect them from ‘all evils’ – apparently. This all made sense to understand how the vilest form of enslavement had to have a very agreeable and sugar coated image in order to be unquestioned and undoubtedly accepted as ‘truth,’ how our constant need to ‘seek god’ was just fearing to realize we are here alone and responsible for every single aspect that has gone wrong in this world, how the enslavement of humanity had been part of a ‘greater process’ by a few individuals that wanted to ‘be Gods’ in existence – it was all revealed to be a sick cosmic joke that we have all been a part of, life after life.

 

As I went through the material, I committed myself to remain skeptical about that which sounded the most fantasy like to me, simply because I could not witness myself the ‘other side’ or ‘the afterlife’/heaven  yet, once again the consistency of the message from the hundreds of beings from all walks in existence speaking through the portal lead me to realize that the final message was quite clear, consistent and made absolute sense as to why this portal had opened and why we they were calling out humanity to walk a process of Self-Honesty. I understood then how all the New Age agenda, the spirituality movement, the promoted ways for ‘peace of mind’ through meditation and seeking to align your chakras to be in resonance with god had been nothing else but a self-interest brainwashing that I had briefly participated in within an attempt to make my life less ‘miserable’ or as I experienced it to be miserable in my existential woes and ever present form of depression. After understanding religion, love, spirituality, channelings as a pillar and essential part to this enslavement of ourselves in our minds, I was ready to leave that all behind and instead begin walking a very different path that I never ever thought I would place myself in: letting go of the idea of god, of spirituality, of something or someone greater than me in order to get to know me as a creator in this reality.

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What I came to realize was that we were truly all alone as human beings, we are the direct creators of the reality that I was wanting to escape from or completely eradicate or disguise with some ulterior beliefs about a genuine spiritual realm that we could somehow rely to in order to be supported or saved in worst case scenarios by invisible beings or forced of the ‘goodness’ that I thought existed beyond the Earth plane, little did I know it was exactly the opposite that this reality existed as.

These realizations led me to understand how I had veered my life to seek answers and make someone else responsible for the mess on Earth due to the fear that I had about who we are and what we have become as the real perpetrators of our crime scene: the world-system imposed on the Earth. This was what partly caused the emotional breakdown that I had to go through in order to be willing to see beyond what I had initially sought to find at Desteni which was just ‘more of the same confirmations about the goodness in existence’ I was wrong. For the first time I had a crystal clear understanding that if we don’t stop deluding ourselves in spirituality, religions, gods, masters, etc. we will continue to abuse and eventually destroy ourselves if we don’t stop.

I went from being a profuse reader of religions, philosophies and watching all kinds of conspiracy theories videos to a more down to earth verifiable investigation of the state of the world; while being subscribed to the DesteniProductions YouTube Channel (2007-2011) we would regularly get all kinds of documentaries and videos that would expose the reality of this world: poverty, crimes against life, corruption in the political world, the destruction of nature, the abuse of the animal kingdom, the conspiracy theory that our economy and monetary systems are, the madness of the human mind, including spiritual messages that were now clearly understood as a genuine scam to divert the human’s attention from the real problems we had provoked in this world. I was taken aback due to the realization that I had mostly avoided watching the full graphic reality that takes place every single day in this world – It made me angry and sad at the same time, going into a depression upon realizing to what extent we have all been too focused on our personal endeavors to get all kinds of gifts from the universe, attract all the money, health and all the ‘good stuff’’ in our lives, aiming at living a happy fulfilled life without ever really wanting to understand how such nice life was in fact being manufactured/produced/created by every individual that is existing in a slave position that earns the daily bread through creating our personal heavens, the real and actual forced labor that exists in this world happens when having no money means: you die.

The sensitivity that I claimed to have toward the world, the usual depression that I would allow myself to be in whenever I would go out in the streets and witnessed the misery, the ‘soft violence’ and constant fear that we all existed in became slowly but surely debunked as the mechanism to protect myself from actually understanding my responsibility within the creation of the problem in this world. I came to understand that my sadness, my depression, my ‘wanting to end it all’ was another form of manipulation to not take responsibility for myself and this world –the constant belittling believing myself to be ‘too little’ to make a change in this world was exposed as a personality trait that had lead me to stand in the background, to choose seeking to create images and pictures that ‘made me feel good’ in an attempt to seek something of ‘real value,’ something ‘greater’ and meaningful to do the work for me, to protect me, to give me some comfort and happiness while pretending that I could ignore the harsh and crude reality that exists for every individual that somehow we have all collectively decided do not deserve to have a dignified living, and yes I realized I am part of the clan as a human being that have accepted and allowed this without a question throughout ages. I understood my self interest to only have a ‘good time’ in this life and be ‘against the system’ while seeking some higher connection with the spiritual realm that I believed was ‘what was real’ – I was wrong, I was absolutely blind.

 

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What became clear was that such ‘nasty thing’ that I had avoided to talk about and pretended to ignore was suddenly understood as the ‘real god’ of this reality: money and this was the simple message that I could clearly reference within my world due to having been keen on politics and sociology before my ‘spirituality’ phase that I had resorted to due to having been too disillusioned of the political and economic world that going to the opposite side was just another shot at ‘making it’ in this life. I had to go back to reviewing the facts of this reality, the same one that is here the moment we go out from the comfort of our homes and the money we have in our wallets – I realized it wasn’t ‘god’ giving me this life, it was money and so my spirituality trip came to an end within the realization that everything I had participated in was a feel-good story for me-myself and I in the mind and that it had made no difference whatsoever to the genuine struggle that the world is sinking in and is continuing to sink in, in spite of this also having been foretold by the various beings through the Desteni portal in 2007 . Five years later and humanity is still opting to hear the feel good fluff rather than walking through a process of self-investigation to see ‘who am I’ within this world, what is my responsibility within this and  how can I practically contribute to stop the madness in here in order to establish the constant and consistent message that Desteni presents and represents: Life in Equality.

 

I started shedding away the beliefs I had held till then since I understood it was only a mindjob in order to justify the worst crimes in our reality, including the monetary system as a belief system, the idea of self as a self-religion and the seeking of my personal desires as a self-interest life path that was contributing to the enslavement of the many and the ignorance that exudes from every corner of this world wherein we are so used to buying and consuming happiness and avoid anything that makes us re-consider who we are, what we’ve done and become and what we are here for.

 

Slowly but surely I made the decision to become an advocate of the rather ‘harsh’ side of reality in an attempt to provide sufficient evidence and personal realizations for all spiritual and religious devotees to hear about such as there being no god, we’re It and there’s nothing and no one coming to save us: we have to do it ourselves.

 

Once stripped from this individual aspect of spirituality that had lead me to voraciously read the articles on the desteni.org website and watch the videos available, I came to the conclusion that I had to obviously do something about this. It was impossible to now turn my back and pretend I didn’t just hear that, it would have been impossible for me to lie to myself any longer – so I directed myself to what was explained to be the practical process that each one of us could live by and apply: the process of Self Honesty through Writing ourselves to Freedom, Writing and Applying Self Forgiveness, Developing Common Sense and Dedicating ourselves to get to know who we are, how we came to be to begin stopping existing as a preprogrammed organic robot that gets to experience highs and lows in various personalities for all the various ‘life scenarios’ and occasions. That’s when I determined myself to be part of this process, because all of the enigmas about god, the afterlife, the creation of humanity were explained in such detail and with such consistency that the key to create and establish solutions on Earth existed in fact within our individual participation in this process – so, if this was the solution I made the decision to do it, I had to finally try these tools that they were constantly explaining and directing everyone to apply. This meant that I had to actually do the whole Process, I had to test the waters and see whether this was ‘for real’ or not – and so I committed myself to this, wanting to be ‘part of it all’ yet not really yet grasping the actual importance of this process on Earth and the changes that were to come within my world, this certainly was No longer an illusion.

SAYING THAT ‘THE WORLD IS AN ILLUSION’ IS AN ATTEMPT TO SOLVE THE PRIMORDIAL PROBLEM ON ‘WHAT IS REAL/ WHAT IS REALITY’ AND FOLLOW THE LAWS OF THE LEAST EFFORT AND ‘SEEKING/ FOLLOWING YOUR GREATEST EXCITEMENT’ TO NOT HAVE TO FACE AND CARE ABOUT THE WORLD/ REALITY WITHOUT SEEING THAT THIS WORLD/ REALITY IS AS REAL AS WE HAVE TO EAT, SHIT, DRINK AND RELATE TO OTHERS TO CONTINUE EXISTING IN IT. HOW COME THAT WE AS HUMANITY DARED OURSELVES TO SIDE-VIEW THE MOST BASIC COMMON SENSE IN THE NAME OF JOY, HAPPINESS, FAITH AND HOPE? EASY, IT’S NICE TO REJOICE IN THE MIND AND NEGLECT OUR RESPONSIBILITY WITHIN IT ALL.

This will continue…

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The blog that explains it all : Heaven’s Journey To Life

 

Related blogs/ vlogs debunking spirituality – 

A selection of my investigation through the Desteni Process

2012 Life After Death–Interdimensional Portal | Testimony

The Video Tolle Doesn’t Want YOU to See

How to Raise Your Frequency (Ask Teal Episode on Increasing Your Vibrations

Spirituality and Capitalism Make sweet love through Hicks

2011 Pretty Happiness Machines – Vlog the Hell Out of this World

2011 Abraham-Hicks – You Are Perfect As You Are – Video

2012 Spirituality and Activism Won’t Change the World – YouTube

Eckhart Tolle – Nirvana Is Already Here –

The Biggest Missing Piece – Abraham Hicks –

Fears and white light beliefs

Don’t try to get rid of the ego!” – Alan Watts’ review

The Jesus Message is Not Religious -

2010 ¿Spiritual Consciousness? Where’s the MATTER? –

2012 Positive Thinking Debunked! Heaven’s Journey To Life

2012 I Used to Be a Loving Person -

2012 Religious Consumerism: God is in the TV

2011 Vatican Exposed & the Faithful Deceived -

2010 EQUALITY: The END of All Religions

2012 Doomsday Character: Sick of Humanity?

2012 Existential Woes: Stop and Know Yourself

2012 Organic Self-Indulgent Lifestyle -

11.11.11 Opening Of The Portal Of The Divine

2012 Walking with Desteni: Why I could Hear the Desteni Message – Part 1 –

2012 Walking with Desteni: Why I could Hear the Desteni Message – Part 2

The Secret History of the Universe: The Discovery of Light –

2010 Do You Want to Be ETERNAL? -

Bruce Lipton ‘ The Power Of Consciousness’ -

2008 I used to believe in a god

Law of Attraction is Based on Memory

Why isn’t Love an Illegal drug?

2012 Love is a Drug: Are YOU an Addict?

Life After God

135. ‘The Secret’ CULTivates Narcissists |

future and white light crap |

Day 11: I.O.U. Life as a Debt System of Power

Occupy LOVE: New Activist Brainwashing

2012 R.I.P. God |

2011 Desteni Portal: Objectives

Desteni y las Teorías de Conspiración

How I was able to Hear Desteni?

In Heaven Everything is Fine

 


229. Not Understanding the Mind leads to Insanity

Self-Addiction to Emotions and Feelings as ‘Who We Are’ = Self Interest

Elitist Character: Mental Disorders Hide us From Self Responsibility – Self Forgiveness and Self Corrective Application

220. Drug Culture: Mad Society as a Lifestyle

 

 

“the Mind/Energy will ‘fight’ for its Polarities, its relationships, its For/Against definitions, because in this process – it maintains friction/conflict, which is what fuel the existence of the Mind, which is what fuels the existence of this very World System, which fuels the attention-diversion/distraction of the Majority of Humanity to be preoccupied in Polarities, Polarity definitions, fuelling separation “divide and conquer” – while the Minority Elite take the reins of Humanity/life on earth – cause no-one is willing to give-up/let go of their Polarity, their Personality Definitions and actually UNDERSTAND ALL THINGS and align them into and as equal and one Solutions for ALL.” – Sunette Spies*

 

Self Forgiveness on who I shaped myself to be as my emotions and feelings.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to accept the energy of friction and conflict as ‘who I am’ within my mind without realizing that it was a part of me that I believed I had a ‘right’ to exist as, because: it is coming from me, it must be me – and in this abdicate my very first awareness to the thoughts in my mind as ‘who I am’ and ‘what I am,’ and from that moment on, losing any perspective to question my thoughts and experiences coming up in the mind and felt in my physical body, but instead simply continued to believe that this inner experience of friction and conflict had a reason’ to be inside me and such, begin defining ‘who I am’ according to my mind, the nature of my thoughts, how I experienced myself as thoughts, emotions and feelings wherein my attention then centralized and focused on Me, My Mind, How I feel, beginning to neglect the rest of the beings and reality in itself just because of being focused on ‘who I am as the mind,’ missing out even the reality of myself as my own physical body within this mind-mode.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to actually use and fuel my own self conversations as a form of entertainment and re-assuring that ‘I am this mind,’ because the process of identifying myself ‘as my mind’ became solid as a child and as such, having this be confirmed by people around me when they started to identify me with a certain character like being ‘angry’ or ‘too aloof’ or ‘too conflictive’ or spoiled, which lead me to continue growing up believing that there was a ‘problem’ within me and that I was not normal/ not as other kids because of having this inner-conflict within me of any kind really,  that I could not ‘sort out’ but believe that ‘this is who I am/ I was born like this/ there is no solution’ – within this

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to believe that this friction and conflict is something that defines me and that I would have to bear with the rest of my life, that there was no questions about it and that I would most likely end up like the adults, being able to ignite in extreme anger in one moment and not be able to stop, which indicates how I became aware of emotions as the aspect I resonated more with, which became a point of identification just because of what I had been exposed to in my reality as a child, which then defined ‘who I am’ according to these surges of anger  and distress that I would experience but was not able to solve within myself, therefore accepting these surges of energy as incontrollable/ unstoppable and ‘who I am,’ which is how I have come to accept the totality of the mind as myself without a question.

 

I realize that yes, the mind represents everything that we have accepted and allowed ourselves to separate ourselves from as ‘our nature’ as humanity which is not of harmony or completion or stability or benevolence, but, of actual evil as the reverse of life as all aspects of separation that we accepted and allowed ourselves to become. This is how I realize that I accepted conflict as a ‘problem’ within myself – just as any other human being – and that due to not knowing how others would also experience themselves, I created a point of specialness as in having some form of ‘anomaly’ for having these ups and down experiences which I identified as being actions that only ‘crazy people’ would have/ experience, eventually wearing the tag as a way to justify my inner conflict and even take proud of that because in one way or another, I was justifying my own personality as ‘special’ and ‘unique’ for having this ways of being which I actually fooled/ kid myself to believe I had no control of, when in fact as I review  such moments, I realize I absolutely was aware of what I was doing and how what I did was a deliberate point of causing and instigating conflict within myself as entertainment and others, because it just felt ‘good.’

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to use friction and conflict within me as a point of self-infatuation and entertainment wherein I began only focusing on ‘How I felt’ in every moment wherein I was given the option to ‘feel good’ or ‘feel bad’ and define everything in my life according to likes and dislikes that became points/  aspects of self identification by people in my environment as ‘who I am,’ and within this

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to believe that because people were okay with having things that they like and dislike or specific characteristics/ moods/ preferences, I was able to then do the same and seek the most unique ways to exist in comparison to them, which is how everything that I perceived as ‘normal’ around me, became my standing point to define myself as everything that I would be ‘against’ to, without realizing that it was never ‘Me’ as a physical being living at all, but just existing as a mind that would lead to define oneself according to standing ‘against’ the majority, standing against/ opposing one’s “normal-environment,” only for the purpose to have a way to stand as a ‘different’ or ‘authentic’ personality defined in opposition to others, and in this only fueling and supporting the separation, the friction and conflict that ensued from that moment on in my life,  wherein

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to within this identification of who I am as the mind, I defined ‘who I am’ according to being ‘the opposite’ to what my family and peers at school represented, and as such, build  my own specialness and security within these definitions at a mind level, which only lead me to every time seek to upgrade my ‘personality’ and preferences, characteristics as a way to not only then antagonize my family or people at school, but the world system in itself in a spiteful mode that I took on toward everything and everyone, without realizing that everything that I spiting at all times was only myself when and while neglecting my very own physical body and the substance that I am as life, using it to power and fuel my  mindfucks, literally, which is unacceptable – therefore

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to accept this culture of ‘personality cultivation’ and creation based on defining me as a particular character with preferences and temperament as all the thoughts, beliefs, ideas and opinions I started creating as ‘my point of view’/ my way of being, without realizing that every single definition that I took on as myself became just another way to define myself As something that would invariably stand within one pole that would create friction/ conflict/ react to the opposite pole as another definition to which I would invariably react to, as I had to somehow ‘defend’ myself as My definition whenever the opposite would present itself in my reality.

I realize that I always had one moment before reacting wherein I would actually decide to ‘role play’ my part and react to that which I was supposed to react to based on my preferences, my personality and that which I defined would make me ‘angry’ or ‘mad’ or happy or sad or excited based on the preferences and personality that I began cultivating as a child as ‘who I am.’

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to ‘fill the character’ that I became by my own apparent ‘will’ to do so, and do, react, say and speak the way that I had built myself to be, do, act and speak like, within this complying to the social norm of becoming a character that is predictable and would react against/ oppose or like that which is defined as the oppostite polarity of myself. Within this also,

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to ‘follow through’ with my own script throughout the years and continue fulfilling the reactive character every time that I was almost expected to ‘fulfill the character,’ which is how I realized that the personalities that I created were mostly  ‘a show’ for others, a way to stand in self-importance, specialness, uniqueness and in that learned to only focus on my self, fulfill myself, react when I was expect to do and never question again this as something that could be stopped, because, I had already ‘gotten married’ with the idea of myself/ gotten too much into character, which then became a Lie I had to follow through with and eventually it integrated fully as ‘who I am’ over the years and that was it. I believed that I could not ‘change me’ and stop participating in the character because of the fear of ‘who would I be without it,’ not realizing that the only thing that fears stopping self definitions is the mind, not who we really as as a physical body that is actually being abused and neglected throughout our developmental processes in the mind wherein we are only focused on cultivating our characters and self-experience.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to believe that the inner conflict experienced would always be with me and that I would grow up to be as angry/ neurotic as the adults I was aware of in the family, and that I would end up being somehow sick and with some form of mental problem or disorder as well as an emotional problem – such as chronic depression or constant worry and stress – without ever really having investigated how this all was just part of me having identified myself with my thoughts, feelings and emotions as ‘who I am’ as well as adopting the ‘ways of being’ from the characters around me in the family/ society, and as such, believing that I had something ‘wrong’ within me because the inner conflict would not go away – hence believing that I was invariably going to have a ‘disease/ sickness/ mental problem’ at a later stage in life – hence

 

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to realize to what extent there is ignorance in humanity with regards to the nature of how the mind works, wherein one single energetic experience was perceived as something utterly ‘wrong,’ or a malfunction, anomaly or disease because of how we’ve programmed ourselves to believe that what we see on TV or as the façade of each other as ‘harmonious,’ ‘happy’ and naturally joyful beings was in fact ‘real’ and had to be ‘who we are,’ without realizing it is a masquerade to hide the actual fear, stress, depression that is experienced within, as that is the nature we have all accepted and allowed ourselves to be and become as the mind, fueling this constant belief that we have to ‘keep up with the positive’ while all the time we experience this inner-conflict when participating in thoughts, feelings and emotions that veered toward the opposite and no matter how we categorize our experiences as positive or negative, they all represent a point of conflict which indicates energy which is of the mind and as such, able to be stopped and self corrected as a point of Self Responsibility.

 

I realize that this  ‘incongruence’ of my inner experience and the outer experience I was supposed to present, created a rift within myself believing that ‘there was something wrong with me,’ and this mostly being talked about in the media as mental disorders and being depressed or having low self esteem, being addicted to a form of self-abuse, belittlement and all of that which was considered as a mental problem/ a Grave problem, which I then kept quiet about and kept a well placed façade of ‘everything is fine, I am perfectly normal,’ even within my dissident/ antagonist characters, but ‘normal,’ and such, veering toward other ways to ‘make sense’ of my inner conflict, leading me nowhere but further confusion and relationships that supported this inner conflict, which became the focus on my life, trying to make sense of it through others, through living the lives of others and avoiding looking at my own, becoming friends with and having relationships that I thought I could use as a way to sort out my own inner conflict through others, instead of focusing on my own and within this, only aggravating the inner conflict that I kept for myself all the time, out of fear of actually having to ‘ask for help.’  Within this

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to label these energetic experiences as ‘mental disorders’ to that are in fact the ‘normal’ workings of the mind within how it  operates and understanding that for that matter, all human beings could be labeled as having some ‘mental disorder’ because The Mind in itself works through friction and conflict that we perceive as our emotions and feelings and thoughts, inner conversations, backchat – therefore there was not going to be in any way a ‘mental health’ or stability possible as long as we would seek only to make people ‘happy’ and ‘positive’ and get their ‘motivation’ back up, which is why and how I always resisted having any support because it seemed to phony to just veer to the positive and ‘be happy’ while the reality that I was witnessing, was nothing but happy for everyone, was nothing but harmonious wherein I would witness a world that was existing in constant fights and problems with money, politicians, poverty, wars and all of this only meaning to me one thing: this world is crazy and so am I, within this

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to use the excuse of ‘the state of the world’ as a way to justify my experience as being ad hoc to the state of the world – madness, instability, depressio, crisis – hence the entire characterization of ‘the sensitive being’ that reacts to what others apparently would not see, and in this becoming even more self absorbed in my own emotional experiences about the world, linking that to ‘art’ and ending up victimizing myself, believing that ‘there is no way out, it’s the devil’s way now’ which is how I see obviously even the music that I would hear would support this entire ‘depressed’ character not because I was not being supported to live – that’s why it is the elitist character, because I was not suffering a physical life of Lack of money/ health/ poverty or abuse – but I was only focusing on cultivating these emotions and ‘sensitivity’ to the world as a point of self interest, because of having learned how ‘artists were sensible beings’ and I actually made people accept me as ‘different’ due to this so-called ‘sensitivity’ and ‘specialness’ that I built in within myself, getting completely in this character that was probably even ‘allowed’ to be alone, isolated, depressed because of the same character of which I also expected to make a ‘name’ of myself for,  and justify my non-compliance to the system as well as defending my ‘point of view’ to not even attempt to create a change within the system itself – in essence: the ultimate justification to Not stand up for my life and the life of this world in equality.

 

All the time that I only cultivated my personality, my inner conflict, my dissatisfaction with life, my helplessness, my worry, my concern, my sadness toward the world, my depression, my confusion about people, my judgmental experiences of opposition toward ‘the world system,’ my desires to just ‘fly away’ and be out of the system, desires to expose the ‘ugly through something beautiful’ in some form of expression were again only actions, words cultivating a character within me, wherein I was not actually willing to investigate my self-experience, my mind and How I had created it, but only ‘get the most of it’ and making it into an acceptable character in society which is why I veered toward arts/ humanitarian studies and ‘dissed’ my apparent potential to become something else because of getting into this ‘sentimental character’ that was apparently my ‘humane’ aspect to cultivate as ‘my real personality’ – thus

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to believe that I had to cultivate my emotions  in order to be on the side of those that were ‘alive’ and could see the world and be sad about it and depressed and feel ‘misunderstood,’ which became really just another self-interest game where I would only remain as a victim, living in constant drama and this belief of there being something ‘wrong’ within me because of not being ‘happy’ and ‘joyful’ naturally – without realizing that:

I had never in fact understood how the mind functioned and how even if I was addicted to feeling sad, sorry for myself, depressed and victimized all the way, is still the same as fixating on everything that is positive, happy and joyful that I criticized extensively in the past, which proves the ignorance toward our own mind wherein we believe that we are somehow being more ‘responsible’ for being sad/ gloomy/ angry at the world when it is just another way to focus on our own experience and not really at all looking at the world and realizing that there are solutions required that will not be solved with us ‘feeling bad’ about it, that’s just blatant self-interest and an actual defense mechanism to not become a sound being that can stand in the face of reality and take absolute self responsibility for ourselves/ the world here as breath, which is what I have realized within this process: we cannot sustain this self-interested experiences of ups and downs and seeking happiness or being subsumed in depressions- which is the same thing – but actually stop participating in all forms of energetic experiences and focus on integrating ourselves to our physical body here as breath, that does Not require to have a particular ‘stance’ toward the world as an experiencing ourselves to do, be, say and act toward what’s best for all.

 

I commit myself to expose how our energetic fixations of the mind as desires, wants and needs – as well as rejections, denials, suppressions – represent the ‘who we are’ as the mind that functions through energy, which is who we have become as consciousness and within this, exposing how we have diminished ourselves in the physical to these limited characters that fight and define one against the other with no ability to actually create solutions, stand up for that which matters, because we are so busy trying to sort out our inner experiences, without even looking at the consequences that are ensuing from such self-experience as a drug of the mind. And so

 

I commit myself to stop any mind fixation within me either perceived as positive or negative and any participation in the self-definition of who I have been as a point of  preference or habit in order to finally be able to stand as  a sound stable physical being that can be effective to be self directive, self-motivated to establish solutions in this world and stop wallowing in any form of self experience as the result of seeing ‘the state of the world’ as that is only but a mechanism of defense to continue existing as a mind that ‘feels’ and ‘becomes emotional’ but establishes no solutions to the problems we’ve created, which is our responsibility at all times.

 

I commit myself to expose how our ‘mental instability’ is nothing ‘out of this world,’ but the mechanism of how the mind works and for this, realizing that reducing ourselves to have some form of ‘mental instability’ is the ultimate self-incapacitation in order to believe that we are not ‘strong enough’ or ‘good enough’ or ‘capable enough’ to stand up to create solutions in this world.

 

I realize that the moment we focus on our mind problems/ inner experience, we absolutely miss out the reality that is here and this is how it is imperative for all of us to get to a point of constancy and consistency as the stability that we are able to all live by here as Breath, as life in the physical, so that we no longer get distracted by our energy fixes of the mind as ‘problems’ and ‘instabilities’ that are self created just as another attention diversion aspect within our worlds.

 

I commit myself to expose how it is only possible for us people that have enough food to eat, a place to live and education to be focusing on this ‘inner experience’ due to having ‘more time’ to spend wondering in the mind instead of being physically working and participating in activities that are related to actually contributing to life on Earth. This is how depression and any other form of mental instability that can be identified as ‘mental disorder’ hence an apparent  “drug-required disease,” is just another way to make money for the pharmaceutical companies that use this ‘weakness’ within the human mind in a capitalist world to believe that emotions and feelings are a disease that can be controlled or healed with chemicals/drugs, instead of actually investigating one’s life to see how these ‘disorders’ were entirely self created, accepted and allowed and as such take responsibility for them, in order to not only correct oneself in one’s living and physical stability, but also to support establishing conditions in this world through education and the necessary changes in the entire system so that whichever system-deficiency is able to be identified as a problem that propitiates this mental problems, we create a solution for, which implies the implementation of the Equal Money System to ensure that people are no longer subject to a survival mode that feeds this inner conflict of the mind, but instead we are able to focus on re-establishing our living conditions to that which is optimal and supportive to be Living in this world as physical beings and no longer existing of/ as friction and conflict in the mind, feeding each other’s mind-realities and instead, support each other to ground ourselves as the physical, stop living as characters and work together to create a world that is based on life in equality.

 

– I will continue with looking at how these energetic experiences of the mind as emotions and feelings causing inner conflict, were reduced to being ‘mental disorders’ of the mind wherein we made an illness of something that is each individual’s point of self responsibility to correct, stop and align to the physical living wherein the focus must always be to stand as beings that support life in Equality with All – and within this, for once and for all, stop supporting each other’s inner-instabilities as ‘who we are’ and dare to call that a human crisis instead of a human problem caused by ourselves and resolved by ourselves individually.

Desteni Forum 

Desteni Lite ProcessFree Course of Self Support

Desteni I Process

Equal Money System

Desteni 

Journey to Life Blogs

 

 

Emotions and Feelings are Self Interest – Stop the Self-Addiction

 

Educate Yourself about How your Mind Operates:

Blogs:

 

Interviews to Step out of the Mind and realize the opportunity and responsibility we hold toward ourselves/ each other to create a world that is livable for all:


176.Imagining the worst case scenario: Obstacles to Protect Self Interest

Continuing with Procrastination CharacterImagination and the reactions to it

You can read more about the exploration within the Imagination dimension in the following blog: 169. Imagination as a Distraction to Not Do things

 

Now, I have walked the thought-dimension of the image of the office and me creating an experience of dread and further anxiety due to the ‘impending doom’ of actually having to confront the professor with my writing itself.

Then there is the other imagination point which is a future projection moment wherein I am facing all the ‘jury’ and presenting my work and expecting the worst which in this case would be them pointing out that my work has nothing to do with my career.

The third point of imagination is having to go through all the ‘paper work’ go get this done, from printing the document to all the necessary permits and letters and all of that scholar bureaucracy that I have also resisted to do.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to within giving energy to the thought of me being at the office, start ‘rolling the imagination’ and playing out a future possibility of my professor simply pointing out that such writing is not acceptable/ is nowhere near finished, and that I have to re-do it all over again wherein I create an experience within my mind within this imagination moment of anxiety and absolute petrification because this means that I have to actually re-do the whole thing again, without realizing that this worst case scenario is only revealing to me how I am entertaining my mind and how I am allowing one single point of imagination to prevent me from actually simply physically doing it.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience myself as incompetent and not good enough when confronting my work with my professor, partly because of fearing that I won’t satisfy the praising of art based on the belief that I have with regards to me having to ‘praise my career’ in such paper, instead of actually realizing that this is my opportunity to be self honest and that as such, this self-investigation does not have to be compromised in any way – I also realize that I am within this participation in imagination, making everything a lot more than what it actually is which is just a protocol aspect of finishing a career, wherein instead, I have allowed myself to go into/ sink into anxiety and fear and what if’s, entertaining me in my mind with all these negative future possible outcomes as imagination, which I have used as an excuse to simply not do anything at all about it.

I realize that within this fear I also immediately realize it for ‘what it is’ and then, a laxity comes after this whole play out wherein it is as if I’ve become ‘comfortably numb’ so to speak with regards to this situation, which actually not acceptable as it is once again, just another way of me giving into energy that seems ‘harmless’ because I am not actively participating in fear, but within that seemingly ‘stable’ calmness I have created my own ‘sedative’/ chill pill within my mind wherein I simply stop looking at those thoughts BUT, instead of moving and taking the opportunity and moment to actually MOVE, I instead leave it for later which is then a point that is revealing to what extent I have made ‘okay’ within my mind to simply not work on this, which is actually based on actual fears emerging within  the imagination and an actual anxiety experienced that I have managed to ‘stop’ in a moment, however it obviously returns because the physical correction is not being done, which means: I can stop fear in the moment as an experience within the entire imagination, and I can stop participating in imagination – however, the point returns and will return as long as I don’t simply do it.

 

When and as I see myself going into imagination point of talking within my professor’s office and hearing the words that indicate that I have to do it all over again, I stop and I breathe – I realize that this imagination is only an excuse for me to actually not do it based on fears and future projections and whatnot which is simply a point of distraction instead of actually DOING IT. I also realize that I can stop the imagination and I can stop the reaction in one breath, however, this same image will continue haunting me as long as I don’t actually DO IT and give it physical direction – this is how I see and realize that no matter if we stop all our participation in thoughts, backchat and imagination and reactions, if we don’t do it, such stopping will simply be another chill pill/ instant placebo remedy wherein we actually then participate in the ‘positive imagination’ in order to make it alright and get back to the ‘feeling good/ better about myself’ in my reality through talking to myself about things that I am doing/ that I can do instead/ that I would ‘rather do’ instead of committing myself to this task.

I commit myself to stop the laxity that comes after relieving myself from these reactions and future play outs within the realization that yes, I am participating in my mind and that is not required in order to do things –however it takes an actual physical movement to ensure that I do not remain the laxity toward my compromise to get this done and believe that ‘fear is just for further self-control’ wherein I talk myself into reasoning why creating fears is simply not necessary to do things, however remain without doing them – thus I commit myself to stop fooling myself when it comes to this ‘stability’ that I know and realize is also a cover up to the actual anxiety that has been suppressed about this point by my own procrastination toward it based on ‘reasoning’ the doing instead of physically doing it.

 

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in the future projection/ imagination point of being in that room where examinations take place and being facing a series of people looking at me with a ‘what the fuck’ face, and going into fear because of realizing that my work is not directly linked to ‘art creation’ itself but more of a self-creative process wherein I am my own prime matter – within this creating a reaction of absolute fear and anxiety when projecting myself within this imagination and going into further backchat – which I will explore later –wherein I while being here and imagining all these aspects, go into fear, shut down everything related to ‘doing that work’ and instead focus in ‘something else’ that must be done, which is me then using other responsibilities as an excuse to not do this, while fully seeing how it is linked to this mind-creation of rejection by the academy toward my work.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be pessimistic about my work, myself and my presentation toward others, wherein while imagining myself presenting my work with others, I see myself trying to sound ‘convincing’ to others and fearing them just not ‘buying it’ without realizing that I don’t have to be convincing others in order to present myself, my writing, talking about it and replicating with common sense at all times

When and as I see myself using the future projection of being in the examination room with people and believing that they are rejecting/ not buying my explanation and me going into absolute nervousness and stumbling upon my own words – I stop and I breathe – I realize that I am only creating this worst case scenario in my mind as an excuse to actually not Do things  – thus

I commit myself to stop pondering about the ‘what ifs’ and instead commit myself to do it, as I see and realize that it must be done no matter how long it takes – I have to get it done.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into an experience of disgust and even tiredness whenever I imagine having to go here and there and print and move with lots of permits and paperwork to get this done, wasting money/ time which I have considered as being very ‘valuable’ within me –without realizing that this is one of the aspects of walking the system, or realizing how things work and function whenever one decides to get a proper title and also realizing that I am making it a lot more in my head based on what other people would tell me with regards to ‘all the time it takes’ and ‘all the paperwork’ which I have created as this foggy load in the back of my head when imagining myself having to go through the same process due to me believing that it will just be ‘too much,’ which is how I have accepted and allowed myself to limit myself based on the Idea that I create of something/ a particular task, instead of simply focusing on Doing it physically and walking through the necessary points breath by breath, as this is how I have also walked an entire career already  – breath by breath, walking Through it and not wasting my breaths hooking onto the ‘experience’ of going through it.

When and as I see myself imagining the entire process of going to all these offices with bright white light and waiting, and sitting and moving around from campus to campus in order to get the papers done and making it an absolute ‘brick’ on the top of my head wherein I go into this heaviness and dread and apathy to do it, I stop and I breathe – I realize that this is part of the points that I must walk through in order to get things done – thus I stop judging, I stop listening to the voices of the memories that indicated/ told me about how ‘dreadful’ and ‘tiresome’ and ‘annoying’ this whole process was which I have used as an excuse to simply not do it at all, which is unacceptable since I am simply at the very last stage of getting this done and as such, I cannot ruin it all just by one single imagination aspect of me having to go through all of these things and making it a lot more than what it in fact is in my mind.

I commit myself to stop participating in the imagination play out of me going to all of these offices and institutional dependencies from the university in order to get the necessary paperwork and instead focus on me walking every step breath by breath and realizing that there are No Shortcuts to this, it must be done, it can be done and it is simply one aspect of the entire process of me walking through this entire phase of my career, unconditionally.

 

I see and realize that this means that I don’t have to create a future projection of getting something done the way that ‘I want to get it done’ which is base on my exigencies of wanting everything to be done perfectly, without any ‘obstacles’ and without any ‘objections’ from others which is then part of the ‘controller’ personality that I see and realize will be part of debunking this entire process which is in essence wanting everything to be done ‘perfectly’ and ‘fine’ with no problems/ no flaws without realizing that this is all existent as this ‘immaculate process’ within my mind instead of actually physically dedicating myself to do it.

 

So how can I be holding on to this imagination and thinking about this point being done ‘perfectly’ and ‘without any objections’ if I am not practically and physically simply doing it?

 

I see and realize how much we can fool ourselves in fears and imaginations and future projections as a justification to not do things, whereas if we had our physical body deciding to imagine how ‘awful’ it would be to digest our food the following day, or having to process a physical activity and becoming fearful of having to ooze the toxins while working out or having to digest and poop out our food, we would be dead as nothing in our physical organism would be / get done – thus if I am standing up for Life in Equality – I equalize myself as my physical body that is unconditional to move and physically function 24/7 every single day as long as I am breathing here – and that’s the reality of physicality – I stop participating in bullshit alternate realities of the mind as ‘obstacles’ of self interest

Ludicrous and must stop here – but this will continue lol

 

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Blogs:

Character Dimensions – PHYSICAL/BEHAVIOUR Dimension (Part 3): DAY 176

Day 176: After Death Communication – Part 25 A History with Life After Death – Part 10

 

Interviews:

The Soul of Money – Part 37

The Soul of Money – Part 36


117. I Think, thus I Fear

What is the binding force within our reality wherein we keep each other safely protected from actually getting to know the Truth of ourselves?

FEAR

We can actually say that Fear has become our Religion, as Money for example is the externalization of the Fear of not having enough to live, which is how we created and manifested a system to control our ‘human nature’ in order to ensure that the entire regulation of how much we would use from this reality to live would be within some ‘bounds’ to not deplete everything and eventually end up consuming more than what we could even handle. Well, we have reached that mark, certainly and at the moment all that we consume is actually stemming from a fear, all that we buy as properties are apparently ways to ‘secure our future,’ all the relationships we create are stemming from a fear to be alone, all the decisions we take such as jobs, education, partnerships, hobbies and even what type of food we eat, where we live, what type of water we drink is stemming from fear. It’s not that difficult to create a political campaign that way: just propose a bunch of ‘Safety and Protection’ policies disguised with words like care and insurance to ensure one vote for your political statements, even if they do not get to be lived out and implemented at all.

As I walk through the streets, I see how our very houses are creaming out FEAR, most of the houses may have some ‘beautiful architecture’ such as how we create and build ourselves in our own minds, but oh what is the ‘cherry on top’ of such grandeur? Well, barbwire, electric fencing, double fencing, CCTV cameras, and if people have enough money/ live in a very well ‘seated’ situation: guards that ensure that ‘no threat’ is able to filter at your door. Our houses and neighborhoods have become like fortresses, prisons I’d say, yet that’s the most normal thing to do in a country wherein obviously, money is an extreme lack, wherein everyone does live out the sentence: ‘It’s easier to steal than work’ and also because there are no opportunities for them to have proper education, proper preparation to have a dignified job, because this entire system has been built to only benefit a few – so, we can see how we have built our own prison, how absurd! Considering it is us that have created it: no god has come to create it for us, we did.

 

“I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see, realise and understand how and why FEAR as Consciousness is/has been the primary driving/creative force of/as the nature of energy that has become the starting-point creative force/source of/as me as the Mind and all the Characters/Personalities within that, that will thus all – equally as one, have an existent starting-point, nature and experience of/as Fear. Which, as we continue walking this process of Character-Creation, will be seen, realised and understood by self, the extent to which we exist as fear, the extent to which we’ve created who we are and how/what we live as fear and so within this, why and how this process of Communication, in keeping the internal truth of ourselves as the reality of the Mind intact while physically speaking the 1% portrayal/presentation of/as who we are: is controlled/determined by/through and as Fear as Consciousness.” – Sunette Spies*

 

And as within, so without – I have been noticing for some time how even slightest movements when walking in the street, that which we call as our ‘instincts’ is in fact all stemming from Fear, survival mechanisms that we have adopted from childhood, fearing each other at all times.

For example, it’s plain to see how we would suddenly cross the street to the opposite sidewalk  if we see someone that looks ‘suspicious’ enough to think they could harm us, how we cross our arms in front of our chest when we feel threatened or suddenly ‘feel’ like we have to portray ourselves as ‘strong’ which can only stem from perceiving a potential threat, how we pull out a condescending character or ‘good doer’ whenever we talk ourselves into our minds to think that a potential threat could have some mercy on us if we portray ourselves to be ‘good hearted beings,’ I’ve definitely thought about that.

 

From childhood we have simply complied to this religion and learn it to be ‘love’  because ‘our parents care for us’ which is how we pass on this twisted idea of Love as an actual mind-possession that serves to mark our territory, to protect our ‘who we are as the mind’ toward others and also, of course, protect our most ingrained desires that are always ensuring that what is best for ourselves is protected at all times. We cannot definitely blame our parents and ‘those that have gone before us’ as we have all been there, done that and blaming would only keep ourselves bound to an egotistical victimization role that has prevented ourselves as humanity to actually change, because it’s simply much easier to blame than actually taking Self-Responsibility.

 

Every decision that we’ve taken is in fact stemming from fear. Whaaaat? Yes, look within yourself, it’s there, it’s a mili-second imperceptible quick assessment of factors wherein we are always looking to maintain ourselves within ‘safe bounds’ of our mind, our con-fine-ment wherein we believe that the mind is something so ‘fine’ that we have to protect it, shield it and defend ourselves from any potential threat to ‘our being,’ but is it?  Or have we just been making/creating Gods in order to excuse the actual Fear that we experience to actually face the fact that we have built an entire world as our own prison, wherein all our decisions have Never been real, but only based on Self-Interest, which is certainly the interest of who we are as our mind only which uses Fear as the most effective protection mechanism, never ever considering what’s best for all as a physical tangible reality, which would certainly be the solution to end all fears – but why have we Not seen this before?

 

Now, looking at the world: Fear is everywhere – from our so called petty peeves to extreme moves and decision making that defines the lives of millions of human beings, Fear can be spotted as the default ‘background’ within it all.

Is it fearful to realize this? Well, only who we are as our minds can create Fear upon the already existent thick layer of fears we have embodied without even realizing how and to what extent we have essentially become a handful of fears that develop personalities and characters for each occasion – I think, thus I fear is what should be a more of an actual understanding of how the moment that we separate ourselves from our physical reality: wham! we are up there scheming, thinking, looking at ourselves as a mind that must protect itself at all cost. It’s time to be willing to go facing our fears: from the most obvious fears that we have even held as ‘personal favorites’ – you know, such as fearing the dark, fearing clowns, fearing to be judged and so forth to the most seemingly imperceptible fears for example when we talk to another being and we suddenly shift our eyes to another direction, in fear of being looking into the eyes when we speak about something wherein we KNOW that our mind is being exposed, along with all the variety of subtle ‘microexpressions’ that we have embraced as our ‘default’ expression – however: who, what and HOW did we shape ourselves into it?

That’s what we learn how to walk, dissect, explore and essentially get to know ourselves as within the Desteni I Process, studying all the Desteni Material and the excellent one-of-a-kind existential education available at Eqafe, wherein we are finally understanding the actual steps to Change the World from our Fearful beingness of the Mind as our own Mind Control to an actual Self-Understanding that will inevitably lead to the process of Self Liberation as Self Birthing Life here in and as the  physical, wherein who we are in our within and without exists as the transparency of what living as flesh and bones should be all about: speaking only when it’s required, thinking practical ways to establish solutions in this world, standing one and equal to the totality of ourselves as our mind and physical to ensure that every single movement is actually Self-Directed and Self-Awareness at all times – yes, from the awareness of one single blink of our eyes to how this entire system functions as our the externalization of our minds.

Great, isn’t it? We’ve got the tools, we have the understanding, we really have it all on a Golden Platter.

It’s just about time we face our greatest Fears – Let’s go stopping our participation in the mind as fear and we’ll realize: we’re still here.

 

Support the Equal Money System which is the primary way in which we are practically proposing a System that is Also an educational tool to learn how to co-exist as equals, simply because inequality has stemmed from the actual fear of not having ‘enough’ and as such, developing Greed from that belief that scarcity is something actually possible – yet we haven’t realized how scarcity as the SCARE with which we maintained ourselves controlled, is an actual outflow of a system that was built in order to maintain and sustain people with ‘pacified minds’ wherein fear became the best way to ensure that no human nature could further scavenge the earth. Well, in our attempt to control, we have become the controlled ones by our Own Creation which is the current monetary system. Hence, we can stop now biting our own tail and realize how a New World System in and as Equality as Life can only exist if we first stop living in fear and start considering what Life can actually be the moment that we dare to stand as Equals.

This is Just one decision away: once you take the decision and walk it, you’ll realize that everything that was preventing you from making such decision was only a self-created Fear.

Journey to Life Blogs: Read them all and see what you fear

Desteni Forum for assistance and support

Demonology 

Face Your Demons

Blogs:

 

Interviews:

My favorite Soul of Money Interview thus far, a MUST Read to see how money affects our entire beingness in this world system:

The Soul of Money – Mind Slaves to Money Authority – Part 31

 

Watch the Documentaries The Century of Self and PsyWar


113. Who am I within Judging Communication?

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create an expectation about communication with another based on memories wherein I immediately access the ‘who I am’ toward a particular being in a particular situation wherein instead of remaining here as breathe without holding any expectation toward the moment I am experiencing myself in, I immediately expect the same type of communication that I have judged as a ‘routine’ and ‘always the same,’ without realizing that it actually takes two to ‘complete the set up’ of recreating a moment based on playing characters instead of actually being able to stop the pattern and instead create a different scenario wherein we can actually decide who we are within such moments.

 

When and as I see myself going into an immediate future projection of a moment I am about to experience myself in with another being in a particular ‘well-known situation’ and already preparing myself to live out the ‘usual format like communication’ – I stop and I breathe – I realize that I am able to remain here as breath, no expectation toward the moment and as such, support myself to step out of character and break the memory-cycle by actually daring to communicate/ instigate communication within an unconditional starting point wherein I can actually decide to direct/ drive the communication into a new direction that stops the usual repetition we usual ‘fall into’ as human beings with our family/ friends, relationships on a day to day living.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself judge someone for asking the same questions and holding the backchat ‘he/she keeps asking the same questions, always saying the same things’ wherein I simply keep a straight face looking ahead without even attempting to say something ‘out of the format-questions/ answers without realizing that it is me the one that can actually direct the communication to sharing myself and interact with another without acting from the past as memories, and that I actually only dared to backchat about the situation because I feared stepping out of the usual ‘script’ of interaction, just to be ‘safe’ which means that I actually feared ‘losing my usual ground’ as the ‘who I am’ toward such particular beings, and not wanting to share myself with another and be vulnerable in a point of communication – in this fearing actually being judged for what I had to say, or for breaking the unspoken ‘usual ways’ we’ve become so used to interacting with one another.

 

When and as I see myself fearing to share myself and step out of the ‘usual questions’ with another, I stop and I breathe – I realize that I am the one that determines what the communication becomes in any given moment and that I decide and have the faculty to actually dare to open up and step out of character into an actual opportunity to share myself with another in self-honesty.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge someone and hold the backchat ‘can he/she not be more open, warm and welcoming?’ without realizing that his is how I victimize myself in a point of communication and creating a character that supports another one’s character within complying to a certain format-like communication that I am certainly not enjoying, yet that I am judging as if I was ‘bound’ to it with no say, which is false as I realize that I can absolutely stand up in that moment and steer the wheel in a new direction that can be actually quite refreshing if we dare to do so.

 

When and as I see myself judging another for not creating/ instigating a point of communication that is open/ vulnerable in the moment, I stop and I breathe. I realize that instead of judging them, I am perfectly capable and able of stepping out of the script and direct the communication the way that I see can create a point of actual interaction to get to share who we are and what we are experiencing ourselves as in the moment, wherein we can create a supportive moment/ interaction for one another, which is what I see and realize this world lacks as we have are so imbued in our own personal judgments as fear toward one another that we rather keep silent instead of actually debunking and exposing our own mindfucks, which is actually quite enjoyable.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to and desire to have a ‘comfortable communication/ conversation’ with another yet because of manipulating myself to remain within the ‘parameters’ that we have created through time as memories from the interactions with particular beings in our reality such as family, friends/ acquaintances we believe that ‘it’s always been this way and it won’t ever change’ wherein I go then into the victimized state and self-manipulation of blaming others for not creating a ‘suitable opening’ to really communicate, without realizing that the moment that I go into backchat about the situation instead of actually speaking, I am in fact fearing to break the ‘safe bubble’ of interaction/ communication with another, wherein we both prefer to ‘keep quiet’ because we really fear communicating to one another, as we fear each other’s judgments and ‘stepping out of character’ within the’ who we are/ who we’ve always been’ toward another.

 

When and as I see myself judging a point of communication as dull and restrictive, I stop and I breathe – I realize that the only real restriction is the one existing within me to not actually dare to stop and stir the wheel of the communication in a new and in the moment way, wherein I can actually support myself and another to step out of our characters and really share ourselves for the first time, as I see and realize that we have only kept ourselves this way because we feared ‘stepping out of character.’ Thus I ensure that I am the one that establishes such point of comfort within myself to share myself as within me doing this with and toward myself, I can expand the same application toward another, wherein no judgment is created toward myself or another in the moment, but only focus on being here as two physical beings that are able to communicate unconditionally and/or support each other to eventually be able to communicate unconditionally as I see and realize that one must be the one that ‘breaks the spell.’

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to ever ask questions to others in order to instigate a point of communication out of fear, simply because of fearing that they are actually judging me for being silent – which is a pattern that I created as a child – without realizing that the moment that I am fearing another being silent, I am not being here as breath, but conditioning another’s expression within my own mind-frame of memories as the ‘who I am’ within communication.

 

When and as I see myself fearing another’s silence within a moment that we physically share together, I stop and I breathe – I realize that I am judging such silent due to my own past memories of being judged because of being silent and always being pushed to speak – thus I realize that I can or cannot communicate based on a self-honest drive to do so or not.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Not realize that the only reason why I would either compromise myself to speak or remain silent was only stemming from fear, fear of being judged if I didn’t do so and fear of what they would think about me if I did do it – thus I remain stable here as self and speak in the moment by directing myself to do so or not. I have now seen and realized that it doesn’t matter if I speak or if I don’t speak with another while sharing a moment, such as the typical example of riding with another in a car wherein I have experienced the most ‘restrictive’ situations because I am bound to be with others sharing a space for a certain amount of time – hence feeling compelled to speak, without realizing that I do not require to do so as the desire to do so is actually stemming from the fear of ‘what will they say if I don’t – hence I stop the mindfuck for once and for all and be unconditionally here willing to share myself and willing to remain silent without holding any backchat about it, but just breathing here.

 

When and as I see myself striking a conversation/ asking questions toward another out of fear of remaining silent/ not communicating at all – I stop and I breathe – I realize that I am the one that is able to decide whether I want to communicate or not, and that I can in fact appreciate a moment of just sharing a physical moment with another wherein verbal communication is not always necessary, yet I decide whether I do so or not.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into a slight nervousness and anxiety whenever I perceive myself that ‘I don’t know what else to say’ which is actually stemming from the desire to ‘keep the energy up’ within a conversation wherein I am actually wanting to make another comfortable and ‘enjoying the moment’ instead of actually realizing how within wanting to apparently ‘please others,’ I am compromising myself, as I am pushing myself to do something that I in fact do not want to do, but feel somehow ‘obliged’ to do, which is stemming from the childhood memory of me being forced to speak or threatened to be exposed as a shy/ insecure/ hermit type of person if I didn’t do it – hence I would speak just so that I would not be judged by others as a shy, closed and hermit person.

I realize that I do not have to impose my plethora of memories of the past in impose it on the physical reality as the moment that we are living in, wherein I can simply remain silent or continue speaking in the moment without feeling compelled/ obliged or even forced to do so.

When and as I see myself reacting in anxiety or nervousness because of ‘seeing a communication point dying’/ going silent and striking conversations out of fear, I stop and I breathe – I realize that I can actually assess whether there is anything relevant to share in the moment or not, hence I stop fearing stopping a point of communication or remaining silent if there is nothing else to say; within this I stop compromising myself to ‘fill in the gaps’ that I feared as the ‘horroris vacui’ that I’ve created when interacting with another, wherein I have feared them judging me as being ‘short-worded/ laconic and/or introverted’ for not speaking too much, not realizing that there two reasons for this.

  • 1. Because I would assess my own communication with others according to ‘who they are’ within my mind, hence limiting myself to speak and communicate with those that I would deem as being compatible with myself based on personality
  • 2. Because of the memories of my mother pushing me to ‘keep conversations going’ as in keeping a positive attitude and moment, wanting to deliberately make others ‘feel good’ in the moment of communication, making them feel like they’re welcomed, without realizing that this was just the ‘good person’ type of play out wherein I learned from my family to always be charismatic and open/ welcoming toward others as a means o show ‘hospitality,’ without realizing that the starting point of these type of applications is always self interest, to have people / visitors that would come to our house deliberately speaking ‘good things’ about us for being such ‘welcoming, warm hearted people’ that would treat guests very well, which is then actually the typical mechanism of sowing ‘goodness’ to reap ‘goodness/ positive feedback’ in self-interest only.

I realize that I can simply end a conversation the moment there is nothing else to say, and that I can also remain silent with another for example in a car, without compromising myself to ‘keep the conversation going’ out of a dishonest starting point such as fear of being judged for being silent or fear of not being ‘acceptable’ for another. Yet I have realized that I can actually communicate with others and enjoy doing so, once that communication is no longer bound to being only a particular character based on memories of ‘who I am’ toward others, but that I can decide to create an openness and unconditional interaction toward others, wherein I can practically break the cycles of the past by me not playing out the past as myself any longer.

When and as I see myself fearing remaining quiet with another, I stop and I breathe – I realize that I do not require speaking all the time to exist and be here.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think, believe and perceive that I would always have to create something ‘astounding’ in my life in order to have something to speak about with others, just because I reduced communication to sharing about that which I would be able to categorize as ‘outrageous’ or ‘out of the ordinary’ point, which is how we have conditioned each other to talk about our ‘quests’ in life that are apparently what makes us ‘live’ and be ‘alive’ every day, without realizing that I am in fact only being and becoming a single copying mechanism of others in order to reduce communication to a single story-telling to instigate emotions or feelings within another in order to assess it as a ‘successful communication’ which is being able to instigate within another a sense of enjoyment or even distress to assess that I have in fact established communication, as we have only defined communication as the interactions of our minds, instead of an equal and one unconditional sharing in the moment, without believing that we have to make another ‘feel’ what we ‘felt’ in a certain moment, as I see and realize that such feelings are not part of the physical reality that I can share instead as physical facts and doings, instead of feelings and emotions that seek empathy from another, and dare calling that communication.

 

When and as I see myself to believe that I have ‘nothing interesting to talk about with another,’ I stop and I breathe – I realize we have conditioned each other to believe we can only communicate if there’s ‘something to speak about’ as that which in our minds is ‘more than’ other regular every day events, simply because of how we have conditioned each other to consume memories to share with another as means to prove ‘who’s got the best living experience of both,’ which is how people share each other’s quests and conquers as a means to be adulated or bashed for something, which in the eye of the mind is equally ‘cool’ as an experience is created in both participants, which is unacceptable as this is how we go ‘building our lives’ in means of creating a point of distress or absolute outrageous activities/ situations in order to ‘have something to talk about,’ as we have learned that the most ‘popular people’ are the ones with ‘outrageous/ out of the ordinary’ type of living, which is one of the reasons why we seek to have money in this world: in order to buy ourselves experiences that we can later on share with another in means of being envied or creating jealousy as that makes us feel ‘better’ about ourselves apparently, without realizing the actual system that we are keeping in place wherein not everyone is able to have the same opportunity to have such ‘outrageous lifestyles’ which only reinstate and confirm that we are willing to communicate and even praise those that are wiling to abuse themselves or others in the name of having some ‘good story to tell. ‘

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think, believe and perceive that being silent is ‘okay’ with another because I have already established a relationship with them, hence not feeling compelled to speak or share because ‘I’ve secured them within my domain,’ which is a usual pattern that would ensue within relationships, wherein the belief of ‘not feeling obliged to speak,’ comes because I believe I don’t require to prove myself to others as being ‘worthy of communicating/ being with,’ which is then actually stemming from the fear of being rejected or being seen as ‘unworthy’ to hang out with/ communicate with, which is how communication because a ‘tool’ for me to only prove that I can be accepted by others, without having realize that I had not even developed the basic understanding of myself and my own mind to see the staring point of my communication as deceptive – thus I realize that it wasn’t really that I ‘enjoyed the silence,’ but I simply associated such moments of silence with a ‘secured relationship’ that I didn’t require to ‘keep up’ because of thinking and believing that I had completed the ‘absolute conquest’ type of application wherein I perceived that I could not ‘lose’ such relationship and that I had them ‘feeing on my hand,’ which is the moment wherein I would actually turn despotic about a relationship, just because of believing that I didn’t have to ‘grow it’ any further, which is actually self-manipulation and desire for control at its finest.

 

When and as I see myself feeling comfortable with another in silence, I stop and I breathe – I actually verify myself to be fully here and ensure that I am not loading any memories or past definitions in the moment and that I am in fact being unconditionally HERE, sharing a physical moment with another wherein words might not be compulsory yet still available when and if there is a requirement to speak. This is then the ability to share a moment with another wherein words are not required for a moment and actually be able to enjoy simply being and breathing.

 

This we can see in the world wherein people talk mostly about their parties, trips, deceptive ways in which they earned a lot of money, the amount of partners they have and the frequency of the sex they have with them, the stuff that is bought – as well as all the negative such as having a ‘bad life’ in any way wherein conversations revolve around blame, self-judgment, guilt, memories that are re-lived in the moment in order to feel depressed about something or someone, which is how we have built and created our relationships with family, friends and colleagues based on being able to tell a ‘nice story’ that they can later on feel either good or bad about, as that is how we have defined our lives to be: either a ‘good’ or a ‘bad’ moment based on our own value-schemes upon a life and reality that is clearly filled with ups and downs that we dare to complain or talk about to either praise or bash, but never actually communicating in order to better the physical conditions in the world that are creating such problem and/or seeing how a cool point can be practically implemented for others as well, simply because we have not yet realized that we are the creators of ourselves in every moment and that we decide who we are and what we remain as or not in every moment of breath here.

 

I realize that communication is an actual cool opportunity to start changing our limited ways of relating to one another based on characters, based on a reality that is restrictive and extremely limited/ conditioned to our own mind-frames – thus in order to start establishing an actual point of change in this world, I realize that words and communication have a very important role that is here in our hands to direct to a best for all outcome. This means that we are the ones that, because we see and understand the current limited frames of what ‘communication is,’ it is our duty to now expand and share and educate each other to see how communication can be different with one another if we simply stop fearing each other and take the opportunity to support oneself and another to see life from a different perspective, wherein communication can actually be self-supportive at all times, wherein we practically stop the same cycles of format-like conversations and protocol-like interactions that only ‘fill in the gaps’ of our actual fear to share ourselves with others – we decide who and what we are toward one another in every moment of breath.

 

Walk the Desteni I Process to establish a self-relationship of establishing a self-honest starting point of communication by first getting to know yourself as your own mind.
Support the Equal Money System to stop compromising each other in relationships of fear that create this entire world system as an entire chain massacre of self-dishonest deeds. Time to Stand as the example of how an actual change in the world begins within ourselves

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This blog is a continuation to:

112. Who am I within Evading Communication?


2012 Self Honesty as Fear Label

“…we’ve become dependent on fear as a survival instinct and so actually fear commonsense and integrity as it is experienced/believed to be a ‘weakness’ – you have to live in fear in order to survive as the law in the matrix goes” Sunette Spies

There is indeed a label placed onto people that are common-sensical, have integrity as a human being and are ‘honest’ within the system’s terms. Fear of survival is that inherent ‘nature’ that we have accepted and allowed as part of the conditions to socialize and interact with other human beings in our reality. We don’t get to know ‘why,’ we just learn ‘that’s how things work’ and don’t dare to even question it further, because that also relegates you to the status of  ‘questioning God’- and that is something apparently untouchable and unable to be doubted. However, our actions and interaction mechanisms reveal the fact that they are actually NOT based on what is best for all at all.

 

What I see is that the ‘fear label’ of being an integral and common sensical person deemed as ‘weak’ is how bullying begins. There is an acceptance that exists behind this, and it is learned at home: you must cheat, lie and deceive if you want to thrive in the system – you must play the game no matter what if you want to live – and that goes unquestioned as well.

 

I have exposed in previous blogs here how I had a difficult time having to ‘get into the system,’ because I was so uncomfortable whenever I had to lie or do something that was merely done to be ‘accepted within the system.’ I had linked it to the culture I live in, wherein lying, deceiving, being corrupt is ‘our every day bread’ as it’s said – meaning, everyone does it, everybody knows and if you don’t do it: you are stupid and weak for not playing rough.

 

There are sayings that imply that you must cheat in order to succeed – hence anyone that is not willing to play that game is usually kicked out of the game and crucified, which means instigating hatred through what we commonly know as ‘bullying.’ The reality is that it is not only a ‘childhood/ teenage’ thing, it is a common way to threaten anyone that wants to straighten the laws of the current crooked system.  That’s how politicians that were intending to create a change were deliberately killed before getting to be presidents – that’s an example that happened here in 1994. And there are even movies that depict how anyone that has ‘good intentions’ within the political realm, will eventually be sucked in by the system simply because of being threatened to death to do so.

 

Thus, what is a bully but a person that judges a being that is mostly honest and common sensical – but because of them not ‘playing the game’ of  fear of survival and fueling the necessary opposition to create rivalry and competition that others can ‘beat’ and win over, the being is forced to participate by deliberately attacking and instigating reactions, which is exactly how within the system we learn that we ‘need to suffer to live’ and other bs like that. All about power games and emotional reactions that keep everyone well fed within a particular suit in the world.

 

“And yet – the positive illusion is so blinding that reality is not seen at all – or, is it that reality is deliberately denied because the illusion is just better and how they suppress the voices and sights in their mind/media of the reality of the situation and fall back into the bliss of the illusion of mind – too scared to face the truth they know already exist: positivity is making no difference to the reality of here

Sunette Spies

 

This is how far we have gotten ourselves as humans – that’s how anything that promotes Equality, Self Honesty, Life, Neighborism, Self Support, Self Forgiveness is tagged as a threat to the ‘status quo’ which is nothing else but living in absolute fear of each other, in constant competition and comparison, living to the rule of thumb of who lives and who dies based on ‘how well you adapt’ to the system of getting to the top no matter how many heads have to fall to do so – and the permanent underlying reason to do so is: Money.

 

And we claim evolution? Fascinatingly enough, evolution contains the word ‘love’ backwards – loveillusion can be the way to describe how these survival mechanisms are accepted, promoted and even defended with the proudly worn crowns of ‘free-will,’ ‘free-choice’ and thinking that ‘competition is healthy’ to create ‘well-bred human beings that make the best of their lives’ – however this free-willer type of statements are based upon equating ‘the best they can’ to their personal gain and satisfying a personal interest that is based mostly on being powerful = having money, ‘being successful in the system’ which, as we know, can only be done if participating within the rules of the game = if you don’t dare to abuse, you are not considered a productive element of society.

 

We have compromised each other to this mechanism and dared to call it ‘making a living,’ existing in fear of each other, transforming ourselves into survival robots that forgot everything about living in common sense – and that’s simply because of how we have structured and based our living reality upon laws and structures that are definitely NOT supporting the well being of all beings, but only perpetuating the same ‘survival of the fittest,’ because that ensures competition, consumerism and the replenishing of the system itself.

Once again without friction/ energy going on, there is nothing that moves the cathode to the anode and the light is not generated.

 

When we dare to see how we exist and what we have created of this system as ourselves, you inevitably change your perspective about your world and reality – if daring to be Self Honest about it. So, what Sunette explains is how we tend to ‘fall back into the mind’ wherein we keep ourselves in that instant gratification of ‘positivity,’ ‘love,’ the eternal pursuit of happiness wherein you can take a chill pill and pretend that ‘everything is fine.’ Sometimes this is not only about drugs, but merely constant self-talk on how ‘beautiful life is’ while neglecting the millions that are starving today.

 

“In a world flooded with positive thinkers, we have hell being born.” – Bernard Poolman

 

This is how our media and enter.tamement operates: ‘be happy, be healthy, seek for your next greatest excitement, seek the truth of yourself, spread love, ‘be yourself’ because you’re worth it and buy your happiness in the mall of your choice – get plastic surgery, look like people in magazines because they are ‘the’ role model to follow, you want to be like them, you can’t just aspire to be like them, you must become them. Get more money, work harder, you’ll eventually ‘get it.’ And billions live by this constant backchat impulsed by all media, family, school, society – virtually any man-made reality is based on these principles, just for the sake of keeping an economic system deliberately designed to enslave some, place others in a perpetual throne while spreading new ways to create illusions of ‘fool.fillment’ to attain to.

 

“Humanity is not growing in any other way but in the rising of consumption in the constant desire to have the next item that will create a feeling of happiness through entertainment” – Bernard Poolman

 

Life is NOT about any of what we have believed it to be about thus far – is Life about working your entire life until you die, having only made enough money to get by? No. Is Life about seeking to be accepted within a certain social-stratum in order to believe that you are now ‘worthy’ and ‘valuable’ in life? No – Who has placed such concepts like ‘value’ upon life to begin with!? We have. We are responsible for it, without any question.

 

Thus, what have we enslaved us to: to spawn beings that will be wrought by the ‘rules of the system’ wherein if you look like someone that would not ‘break a plate’ – which is stealing, cheating, deceiving, abusing in order to thrive – then you are seen as  a threat to the dog-eat-dog world. And it is fascinating that I had not seen this as clear as it is until today. Have a look at your matrix personality designs wherein ‘nerds’ or clear-headed kids are bullied because they are not ‘playing the game’ and fighting toward others to ‘get to be the king of the hill.’ I mean, they are relegated to being some anomaly that must be exterminated – and that’s how by default, only the ones that dared to play the game become part of the successful-stories of humans that ‘make it’ – those that didn’t dare to do the same,  remain secluded and ostracized. This is the proof of how the ‘rules of the game’ are in fact evil.

 

“Is the drive for profit a fear not fully realized yet? Or do those that thrive in the system place profit above all morality as they belief the less the consumer know, the less the possibility of fear?”
Bernard Poolman

 

No positivity will ever change the world because how can any form of ‘goodness’ be created upon a thick layer of slaves that are working 18 hours a day for you to have your latest iPad, which is a ‘symbol of success,’ success that you seek with such positivity and light-loving nature of asking it to the universe – Who is the real evil in this world to neglect the abuse and suffering that ‘successful lifestyles’ are based upon?

 

Not wanting to step out of the love and light illusion should be considered as a crime against life. There is no worse sickening bullshit being peddled around other than ‘seeking your next greatest excitement’ while having over half of the world suffering for not having the least to have a dignified living condition.

 

Do we have to go as far as having to lose it all in order to open our eyes to see the LIE we have created as an illusion of life? Do we have to get to the bottom of our self-created pit and exist in regret for the rest of our existence because of having neglected the reality that is HERE as ourselves, as our world? I say no – stand up from your meditation cushion, take off the blindfold, be part of the ones that stop nagging and inducing others to be abusive to thrive in this world, that stop pretending that living is achieving the ultimate status of a famous and powerful person while neglecting the lives that had to be enslaved to build such empire of dirt.

 

Time to wake up– we are here and ready to Stop All Fears in our Reality as this is the KEY to realize how much we have feared each other. Dare to be Self-Honest to stop being a happy-positive cogwheel that churns on fears and desires and self-induced needs that are not actually related to actual-living at all.

You don’t need love, you don’t need light, you don’t need ‘God’ – all you require is having the courage to live in Self Honesty which is not about ‘doing the right thing,’ but going through a process of self-investigation to see what we are participating in that is keeping the current system of abuse in place, and how to correct ourselves to create a reality that’s best for all, daring to expose the lies that we have ‘lived’ thus far and actually do something about it.

 

“The message of God uses the Fear of God to drive followers to the Love of God. This confirms that the source of Love is Fear. The world is Evidence that Love will never conquer Fear.” – Bernard Poolman

cara1

 

 

 

Suggested read:

Jack – The Courage to live Self-Honestly

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Spirituality Under the Microscope – Volume 1

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Money is the Light of God on Earth

Life After God

“Is feeling nothing the inevitable result of believing in nothing? And then I got to feeling frightened – thinking that there might not actually be anything to believe in, in particular. I thought it would be such a sick joke to have to remain alive for decades and not believe in or feel anything.” – Douglas Coupland

This is a quote from the book ‘Life after God’ which I deemed to be one of my favorite books. After a while, I simply made the title my favorite part of it as this process has been in fact the realization of myself getting rid of any form of belief in a ‘god/ superior being’ and the religion I had created as myself and my own mind filled with limitations, fears and a certain angst toward reality, seeking a way to ‘save myself’ from what I deemed some type of ‘Earthly punishment.’

I was looking at some of my old blog entries which are a great way to look at myself 4 years ago and I can see how I was existing in an entire personality set that would seep through the entirety of the texts I wrote, fascinating how we can really pour out our entire personality through words.

Part of this process of getting to know ‘who I really am’ and what my actual expression is has been walked not only through words, but creating images/ drawings. I remembered how even if I had believed myself to be ‘alright’ in my world, images of the world Not being ‘alright’ were coming through in the form of drawings/ paintings, which lead me to actually see that how I experienced myself had to do with how I saw the world existed.

Let me explain it better. I’ve grown up in a supportive family, having all that I require to live and having access to education and even ‘follow my dreams’ to a certain extent – yet there was like an ‘existential anguish’ that hovered around me all the time, which is how I embodied a rather depressive personality even if I could smile and pretend that everything is fine and ‘have fun.’ Who I was and how I actually experienced myself would come out whenever I could experience myself being alone, that’s when the world would ‘fall on me’ and I would just see myself as incapable of doing something, not knowing exactly ‘what I could do to change the world,’ what I could do to give my life some meaning and direction, something that actually Mattered.

I was simply wanting to create a world that was in fact best for all – yet not naming it like that or even realizing this was actually the point – and in that, creating myself as a human being that could be ‘free’ from this system. The bounds and limitations I experienced were mostly related to me seeking something/ someone to come and save me – to ‘fulfill me,’ to give a meaning to my life. This book became a declaration of that, I could relate to what Doug Coupland was saying: feeling awkward for not feeling, losing any faith in a god yet desperately ‘needing’ something/ someone at the same time.  I also sought to be ‘happy’ at some point, because that’s what everyone wanted and desired and in my attempts to ‘fit in’ this world, I once sought to be fulfilled as well, never seeing that I was in fact only following what we’ve created as our personal agendas of self-service wherein we add the usual money, love, great health, great looks and being ‘free’ from whatever we perceived as an oppression. I also wanted that, and I also thought that because I had lost all ‘faith’ in myself I had to now deposit ‘faith’ into some greater outcome that I could hold on to, to keep walking, to give a meaning to life because nothing made any sense.

“My secret is that I need God – that I am sick and can no longer make it alone. I need God to help me give, because I no longer seem to be capable of giving; to help me be kind, as I no longer seem capable of kindness; to help me love, as I seem to be beyond being able to love.”

I read this book in November, 2005 and this is the previous to last page of it. These particular words planted the ‘seed’ to ‘search for god’ in a more directive way. In the back of my head I knew that I was not ‘believing in god’ as the usual stereotype of a man sitting on heaven looking down at us. I sought for something ‘beyond myself’ and in that, my spiritual quest became a reality during 2006 and 2007, two intense years of my life wherein it is almost as if entire lifetimes of spiritual quests were just shrunk and condensed to be experienced in what I can only recall as one hell of a ride.

I resonated with such words because I also didn’t want to accept myself as ‘giving up’ on myself completely, I gave myself a last chance within seeking a religion, a God or anything that could give meaning to my life.  I was in quite a state of desperation and feeling like the ultimate victim, the misunderstood and sensitive woman on Earth that needs something/ someone to come and save her from her misery. I ‘knew’ that I had ‘so much to give’ but I couldn’t find it in myself to simply live it as myself – in fact all that I had missed within this entire personality was: Myself.

Seeking for God is no different to seeking for: ourselves. We really are the ones we have been waiting for. 

Within this process I realized how all the good intentions pave the road to hell, I had an ‘open heart’ to become a light worker or some other type of spiritual guru to support people, because I thought that only through fixing and saving others’ lives I could save mine. I always missed myself in the equation, missed myself as the starting point of it all.

When I realized I had to take my own life by the hand, I realized how much I had neglected myself: my physical body, the very breath that keeps me alive, the world that I live in which is providing me for what I eat. We get to be so consumed in our thoughts that we forget about the entire physical realm that is giving us the necessary to exist here – yet we use it only as fuel to charge up ourselves and continue only existing ‘up there’ in the mind, seeking for love, seeking for happiness, success, fulfillment, the perfect relationship, the perfect job, the perfect house, the perfect reality wherein you just do the same every single day and wait to die to ‘ascend to heaven’  and apparently only ‘then’ be able to actually Live.

I was wrong and I can say that we’ve all been wrong within existing in this world in such a limited frame of mind of what ‘life’ is,  only thinking that this world cannot be changed because we hadn’t even realized what had to be changed and corrected. 

How can we give up on ourselves if we haven’t even ever lived?

How can we require a non-existent and invisible ‘god’ to help us do something while realizing that anything that we do or don’t do is only able to be walked and lived by ourselves, individually – yet as equals.

Walking out of a victimization state, walking out of self-pity, of an entire personality of being seemingly powerless, inferior, not able to do something to ‘change this world’ which I always saw as something ‘out there’ instead of beginning Here as myself.

The point of realizing I had been missing myself suffused as I walked a process of writing myself out, seeing how in between all the flair and personality I had become, I could spot some common sense that seemed like ‘the real me’ -  I started then digging more and more into those glimpses of common sense and realizing how I had to stop playing out the character that had become the epitome of hopelessness, of ‘waiting’ for something/ someone, of being just playing out the victim of society and spiting it back with self-abusive behaviors. That’s how some call our generation the ‘Lost Generation’ – yet we can only be lost if we had ever ‘found’ ourselves and we never did, because we always looked outside of ourselves. It was just a nice tag to remain in oblivion of what was actually/ really going on in this world, actual suffering that I avoided to look at during my ‘spiritual awakening’ because of believing that ‘focusing on the negative will create negativity in my life.’ Oh yes, how deluded was I.

I’ve forgiven myself for having deposited myself – yes almost in an accounting way – to the idea of a god or some extraordinary superior energy that I could attain and become eternally blissful with. We’ve all become lightworkers when seeking only to fulfill our own lives while neglecting the rest of the world, that’s a fact. If spirituality promotes individualism, capitalism could also be called light-system wherein we all sought it and depended of it to live.

As I write, it is still awkward we are living in a world where such fictional value still exist, seems like we are truly only playing re-runs of a reality that has already failed a long, long time ago. We’ve only continued living out this same reality out of being absolutely blind to see that we don’t require any god to Live, we don’t require any ‘all mighty dude’ to come and give us some guidelines on what needs to be done. We have a principle to live by and it is Equality as life, we have a set of tools to finally become our own self-responsible creators: self forgiveness, self honesty and an ever lasting consideration of what’s best for all as the starting point of anything we do and direct ourselves within our lives.

I have seen how ‘Life after God’ means just that: us human beings finally getting rid of such a dominant belief system to being to learn how to live. God isn’t only this ‘character’ we keep in the back of our heads as ‘something/ someone more powerful than us;’ God has also become our own ruling personality that decides for us, that seeks to remain in an eternal state of self righteousness because that is apparently ‘who we are.’

Equality can be anything, including God, but we can see that there is no point in naming it God if we are all one and equal – we could call ourselves god or saviors or anything else and remain the same meaning: self responsibility remains HERE as our duty, as a must do point to get to finally see what Living is all about.

At the moment we have only realized that this world is in our hands and that everything that we once sought for in a god/ religion/ philosophy/ spirituality is able to be given by ourselves as a self-willed living decision to stand up for Life in Equality, as a process of Self Forgiveness.

I now realize that every time that I saw no way out and wanting to ‘stop existing’ was only stemming from a desire to actually live. The bottom line is that whenever I saw myself yearning for a ‘way out’ it was actually wanting to get HERE, to be Real at last. It never made any sense to me that this is all there is to this world. And it is a fact, it is not all we can be.

We’ve been living in a system of limitation, separation, seclusion, fear, judgments and the list goes on. What happens after such restrictions? What is there to live once we free ourselves from our own personalities, once we shed the old skin manifested as this entire world system based in abuse, harm, hatred and disregard of each other? What comes after ‘God’ in our lives?

Ourselves, what’s here, reality to be explored, to Live.

How can we give up on ourselves if we have never been real? How can we feel lost if we never really ‘found’ ourselves? How could humanity ever trust in a god that never showed its face here? Ludicrous, yet we are here to stop existing in such limitation, we are here to support ourselves to shed the dry skin of the past and walk as the reality that we see is common sense to live in this world. It will take time, yes, but there is nothing else to be done here. Everything we could ever require to do so is already here, we just have to learn how to cooperate, work together, step out of our egos and limited frames of mind and give it all to make our lives real.

I speak this for myself as I saw how being in a pointlessness and rather obfuscated mind-view of this world lead me nowhere but to further thoughts and experiences of being lost and confused and helpless, never seeing that I had to become the point of my existence, that I had to do what it takes to get to actually Live. There is nothing else to be/ become or do here, we now stand as the law of our being, we become instruments to manifest what is already here in Equality.

Give yourself a chance, that’s what Desteni is about: giving ourselves this one opportunity, a second ‘go’ in this world to finally live. When I realized this point, I felt immensely grateful – no exaggeration -because I realized how I had wanted to die only because of being tormented by my own thoughts, by my own fears, by my own limited view of ‘who I am’ as this being that wasn’t certainly ‘comfortable’ in her own skin before, I am getting there as every day that I untie a knot that keeps me bound to the past that I was. I saw how it wasn’t a ‘god’ giving me a second chance, it was actually me having placed myself in this process, in this position wherein I am willing myself to live – this is what’s so important about this process: we do it to ourselves, we live it ourselves, we stand as individuals yet altogether as one single agreement: to live what’s best for all, to be and become the change that we’ve never ever seen in this reality.

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to miss myself in the entire equation that I am as Life

I forgive myself that I ever accepted and allowed myself to want to end my ‘life’ without having ever actually lived

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to ever be so tormented by my own thoughts, by my own fears, by my own feelings and emotions without ever realizing I was doing it all myself, that I could stop being a victim by stopping myself from victimizing myself, that I could stop myself from generating experiences in an attempt to ‘live’

Certainly, the point that I’ve learned this life is how to Forgive Myself. Once we grasp the meaning of this, we open the door to an actual ability to live, we untie the knots that we’ve created, just because of not knowing what could possibly ‘be’ if we let go of our mind. That’s life after God, life after our own religion of self as the mind, Life after the limited frame of view we’ve had of this world until now.

We are ready, we are walking here to actually live – we don’t really require anything or anyone else – all is set and ready for us to take the wheel and drive the road to Here, as Equals.

Quotes taken from:

Coupland, Douglas. Life After God. 1st ed. New York: Pocket books, 1995. Print.

Watch Anna talking about a song by Robot Virgins that certainly came through as I was writing this blog, you’ll find the link to the song and the album in Anna’s video. Please listen as this is definitely a cool  add on to this entry

2012 – Music that Changed My Life: Robot Virgins “Your Truth”

http://www.desteni.org

http://www.eqafe.com – Life Supports Life


Fluffy-sparkly li(v)es

We all are here for some special purpose so STOP
STOP being prisoner of past
AND become the architect of your future
DO the things u fear… – spiritual proverb

If we were here for some special purpose, don’t you think we are way overdue in accomplishing it? Or that we should be getting some clear indication of what it might possibly be about? We have gone through the same cycles over and over again throughout thousands of years with no possible answer to ‘fulfill our mission’ – could this be an indication that there was no mission at all? What would it be like if we got to understand that we’ve been a cosmic joke? Would there by any ego-enhancement within that?

The relevancy of the Desteni material is to realize that all sweetened justifications and ideas of us being here for some ‘supreme reason’ have been  blatant lies to keep the entire belief system of ‘god’ and the holy trini.ties in place. In other words, keeping ‘good faith’ and believing that we would eventually ascend to a ‘higher status’ once we brake the ‘chains of the past’ has been another form of control to keep everyone seeking for the ultimate blissful experience and never ever questioning how dysfunctional the system is and how we’ve managed to live life after life without any actual progress.

Evolution anyone?

Here we are, more ‘human’ than ever, not even able to recognize ourselves as the creators of this entire existence and take self responsibility for it, not able to see the blatant lies we’ve believed in for such a long time beginning with the current monetary system, not being able to stop such basic problems like terminal diseases, poverty and starvation regardless of having enough technology to get to Mars and explore the nice pictures of the universe far far away; not being able to stop the constant thinking which is the very same chatter that makes us believe that there is something ‘magnificent’ yet to be unveiled as our living purpose. It’s all been fluffy sparkling lies to make us feel better = less miserable when realizing that there is no such purpose in this world other than realizing what self creation is – and that hasn’t been understood within all its implications.

False self-empowerment can only uplift someone through pre-accepted and allowed beliefs of grandeur and magnificence as our ‘true nature’ wherein self then tries to ‘overcome the past’ and the ‘limitations’ through doing that which you believe will ‘break you free,’ apparently becoming ‘more’ through beating yourself against the odds – lol. It is really ludicrous to have this idea that becoming a ‘better being’ entails only considering your own experience, your own beliefs, your own reality without even questioning what type of ‘fear’ can someone that is starving  overcome to become the architects of their future? Hmm, I bet that their greatest fear just as any other human being’s would be linked to dying and currently, not even if they could use the law of attraction and visualize themselves as ‘god’ itself could they manifest food to eat and clean water to drink. How narrow minded do we have to be to believe in such ‘uplifting statements’ of there being a god, a something/someone that is having it all ‘under control’ while there are beings that cannot clearly even conceive that the suffering they endure every single day could possibly have any ‘higher purpose’ other than being a sick joke from a non-existent god that solaces in watching people starve wherein they can’t even uplift their condition to a living one. If there is no god, then who are the ones allowing such atrocities to remain as a constant aspect of our reality without doing anything to stop it? No one else but ourselves.

All things god, all things light, all things love, all things happiness, all things enlightenment, all things spirituality, all things bliss, all things that can be ‘exciting’ have but one single purpose: keeping everyone with a fake smile in place making themselves believe that human life is inherently benevolent  – how can we possibly even pretend everything is ‘fine’ and feel ‘blessed’ and ‘loved’ when there is but a single person in this world that is you and me as well that is being abused, that is starving, that is suffering some terminal disease, that is being raped, that is being fired after serving as a loyal slave for a lifetime – all events designed by an apparent benevolent force according to all those that preach some form of godhead exist. How come that we’ve kept ourselves perfectly occupied within our minds, not being able to see the forest for the trees, yet always seeking the next biggest excitement, the next uplifting energetic experience that can keep us ‘going,’ putting on the same show everyday until there is eventually no more artificial power to keep it running.

This is how Self Honesty is the most difficult thing we’ll ever walk in this world as there can be no other point of motivation outside of ourselves but ourselves – being the point of our existence is something that we’ve never realized and in that, self-acceptance, self-will and creating an actual consideration toward ourselves as this reality are points that must be cultivated for the very first time in our human existence. Self Honesty means that we move by principle, we realize ourselves as the creators of this reality simply to take self responsibility for it, stopping any form of personal ‘upliftment’ to make us then feel better and special, just to have something to ‘strive’ for and accept the enslavement that exists as a tricky aspect of our existence and that’s it.

Well, there are thousands of quotes like the one at the beginning of this post polluting cyberspace – I say ‘polluting’ because they are like temporary kicks of sugar to our brain wherein we believe that we can ‘do it all’ and feel better about ourselves which is already accepting a form of ‘positivity’ and ‘brightness’ added to an existence that we’ve accepted as inherently flawed in the first place – that’s the only reason why we would stick to the ‘positive side,’ just to hide the actual facts and self-experience that I suggest: must be exposed for what it is. The more we keep our demons trapped, the more difficult it will get to face ourselves as such experiences to stop and correct them. Living in denial is living in such false sense of self-empowerment, it is definitely  yet another crime against humanity as one is certainly missing out the entire reality of this world that is certainly NOT blissful, not great, not special in any way whatsoever.

The moment we dare to step down from our high horse, we will be able to walk in humbleness, understanding how reality operates and walking the necessary steps to become the solution that has never existed within this world directed and created to benefit all equally.

Overcome your fears.

Okay so by following such advices like the one in the quote, I could jump down from the top of a skyscraper and apparently that would be creating my future and being ‘my architect’ – I bet that wouldn’t change a thing other than experiencing major fractures or injuries or even death – this reality is certainly not exactly the same as the matrix movie.  We can all see how this is the type of energetic ‘uplift’ that anyone can obtain in some form of spiritual exorcism wherein you feel completely ‘great’ and apparently liberated in the moment, only having to wait for a while until the effect runs out and the actual bullshit starts hitting the fan – just like any other drug really. This leaves us with the realization that such words can only feel like ‘sweets’ that dissolve very quickly and end up leaving a bitter taste which won’t be corrected unless we start taking actual self responsibility to Stop the Past, and be the actual creators of a reality that isn’t based on fears, limitations and polarities of good and evil as the memories of abuse and negligence lived out toward ourselves. For that, Self Forgiveness is the way.

The fact that in such statement self creation is only existing as a way to ‘overcome one’s fears’ and feeling great about it is revealing to what extent we’ve limited self creation to. ‘Overcoming fears’ can only be an initial point to start debunking the lies and limitations we’ve accepted as ‘who we are,’ but it cannot possibly be ‘all there is’ to this reality, not at all.

Real self-empowerment begins when we consider the ability to create a world that’s best for all – this has nothing to do with becoming ‘more’ than or ‘better’ or ‘supreme beings’ – No, it is simply establishing the way that things should have always been in this reality, it is a matter of aligning with the principles of life, the life that has been absolutely disregarded while getting ourselves lost in the ideas of being/becoming nothing more than some type of super hero that runs on batteries, eventually having to step down from the cloud to face the actual process of creating a world that is best for all.

Let’s stop being prisoners of our mind and start learning how we can direct ourselves to finally live, for real and not just think about it.

‎”Gratitude when half the world starve is not based on love or oneness or light, It has its roots in survival. To feel love and gratitude in spite of the evidence of suffering in this world confirms that good feelings are also demonic possessions and purely the result of trained methods with which to turn a blind eye to actual truth as reality. All masters and Gurus should be seen for what they are, send to deceive and distract you from being the dominion on earth that produce a reality that is best for all. What excuse are you going to have for not attending to the suffering when you are able to?”-Bernard Poolman

Learn more about the very basic steps to start supporting yourself in this process of Self Honesty, correcting ourselves to eventually live.


‘Reality-Insight and not Mind-feeling’

“All experience is always judgment” – Bernard Poolman

experience
n    noun
1    practical contact with and observation of facts or events.
2    knowledge or skill gained over time.
3    an event or activity which leaves a lasting impression.
n    verb encounter (an event or situation). Øfeel (an emotion).

 

If we understand that we are currently walking-experiences, we can see that everything that we go through is assessed by the mind as an experience – Life is Not an Experience yet we are currently walking as mind-created experiences wherein we can simply stop identifying ourselves as the feeling/emotion/judgmental experience and instead SEE through practical living-application how we can go living ourselves as a point of change – yes, it will still be a mind-perception of yourself yet it will be a more physical experience wherein no more backchat is directing the reality but simple physical living interaction – this is what we’re walking.

 

How we use the tools is to identify ourselves as the experience that we’ve become of thoughts, emotions and feelings and as we go stopping we will still experience ourselves in a certain manner as we are currently existing as mind consciousness systems that assess and value everything according to one’s established parameters – we’re establishing parameters that are aligned with what’s best for all in common sense which certainly creates a guideline of how we are able to practically physically live and still experience ourselves yet not clogged and stuffed with emotions and feelings and useless thoughts, but instead allow ourselves to stand equal to the mind to direct ourselves. That’s what’s here as ourselves hence we direct us to the best possible outcome that’s livable/ walkable in this reality through direct realization of it being in fact so.

 

This is how we realize that all knowledge must go, that all past perceptions as experiences of ‘who we are’ must be self forgiven and let go of because all of them are holds that keep the system in place – we are the system and unless we stop feeding the same constructs and walking in absolute directive principle, we’ll re-create the same patterns over and over again which is in essence recreating the past of self-enslavement with no self-direction consideration.

 

 

“the price that must be paid for our blindness due to experiences” – Bernard Poolman

We’ve disregarded life while wallowing in our mental diseases that we’ve accepted as ‘human nature’ as ‘our life experience’ – this is only one of the reasons why giving up the mind is giving up the actual harm and abuse imposed on to life – it’s only fair that we’ve got to walk now from the consequences of such continued disregard to what is here as ourselves while existing as the helmets on the head.

 

It’s clear that the physical body doesn’t ‘experience’ knowledge or values/ judgments upon comparison, worth imposed over things and people – all of that is but mind-creations, huminds creations that we’ve accepted and allowed ourselves to wallow in. The physical just IS:

“The physical -has no agenda, need to know nothing, is already in full design, and live as it breathes, as it eats, as it fucks, as it touch. The mind – has judgments, reasons, meanings, laws about everything -without actually understanding anything.” - Bernard Poolman

So physical-experience is still an experience yet has nothing to do with the mental schemes of values/worth/judgments that we impose on to that which functions as a vital system – the physical is a vital system that doesn’t require us to ‘think’ to function – example is how body digests and absorbs nutrients without us having to direct a single thing of that process, we’re not even aware of how it all takes place, that’s proof of how detached we are of our own physical body.

 

“mathematics shows that if one follow common sense and NOT experience–we can change the world”
– Bernard Poolman

So, in terms of participation in reality, we’ve got to stick to the physical cross-reference of ourselves, to remain here as breath to simply stop feeding our ‘life as an experience’ and simply walk here with the necessary points to be done.

 

We’ve discussed how the mind-experience is still overriding common sense living which is the physical living wherein everything is ‘there’ for all to see. An experience is only experienced by each one, it’s ‘invisible’, it takes place in the mind of each one – that’s how we’ve lived as separate bubbles as our thoughts, just this globe on our heads that no one sees yet we know ‘it’s there’, creating an alternate experience of what’s Here as our physical body that lives, that exists in simplicity.

 

“when you die–the experience abruptly ends” – BP

So, the point to realize here is that we cannot just stop ourselves being an experience as that would imply we’d have to die – as the above quote presents – so what’s practical here to do? We simply direct ourselves to be living here as the physical, to breathe in and out to literally heal ourselves from all the damage we’ve done to this world, to ourselves as our physical body poisoned by all our mind back-chatter. It is insane that we’ve lived as constant self-abuse machines without ever even pondering if that was ‘natural’ to do – yes, our “human nature” is severely fucked up and not at all in harmony with the physical.

 

Human nature as experience

We can then see how it’s been a HUGE Lie from our world system to identify that the glorious thing about humanity was to possess a mind to think, feel, experience, etc – that is the very thing that allowed us to get into our EGO of the mind and thus possess this world through the marvelous Machiavellic existence as Egos that want to conquer and dominate everything and everyone.

Is that what we want to remain like?

No, absolutely not.

 

So, hereby I express how I am not willing to second the mind in its own glorification, survival and regurgitation – that has simply created hell on Earth and I’d like to quote Bernard once more because these words must be heard everywhere possible:

 

“Ego is the acceptance as self as superior to others in truth and thus the allowance of chaos to find an angle with which to screw all competition till only the ego version of truth remains — then the ego were right and for this, the ego will destroy the planet” – Bernard Poolman

 

We’re walking as all of these points, we are supporting ourselves to become effective in simply stopping ourselves from living as walking-experience and instead get us into a living-physical reality wherein no backchatter exist as directive principle and prime influence over ourselves dictating our experience as ‘who we are’.

We are experiences walking into the living reality – and this is how we’ll continue walking because we see, realize and understand how the humind motivated by internal back-chat has created the current system to be of such abusive and unequal nature, we have seen how the humind in search for new experiences has lead this entire world to the brink of destruction while trying to ‘experience more’ and ‘get more’ which has become the drive for all human action.

 

So from here one when we share ourselves, we’ve got to make sure that we speak from direct-seeing here as part of our physical amalgamation to the reality that is HERE physical and not only sharing the reaction that is mostly emotional/feeling based according to past-patterns that exist as the mind -  as Sunette pointed out

‘Reality-Insight and not Mind-feeling’

 

When we are existing in our mind we are only caring for our personal fulfillment of the idea that we’ve become, we don’t consider the totality of reality that is here as ourselves. By exerting a single opinion or judgment upon this world, we are in fact supporting the existence of such judgment as part of the reality we live in. We’ve become so used to criticize and point-fingers at ‘others’ instead of actually simply dedicating ourselves to STOP from remaining as complaining systems instead of being in fact the solution to all this humind distortion of reality: stopping ourselves from participating in thoughts, feelings, emotions = stopping existing as the mind and start living as the physical.

 

We’ve got to stop living as the Illusion – the ill-uses we’ve placed as value/worth on to what is simply here – it is a constant addiction to seek experiences in everything, everyone out of virtually anything – even if it’s something as simple as going out we tend to seek to have an experience out of it, out of watching nature, sometimes even creating a mental experience of breathing ! lol that’s in essence how meditation works, quite a mental job indeed.

 

So, we’re all here learning how to actually in-fact live, this is the process – we’re all in this together at the same level and so we simply are here to walk and live and share and support ourselves within it.

This is where we’re currently at walking as a group of people that are willing themselves to live and let go/stop/terminate all the illusion of this world – that’ll in essence will eventually expand to changing the current world system as part of this realization on physical-tangible living wherein no more super imposed caps exist on life.

 

No more mental-limitations to what is HERE as Life.

 

Let’s continue breath-walking


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