Tag Archives: helplessness

447. Interacting with the News/Media: from Helplessness to Personal Empowerment

For some reason, things have become a lot clearer these days for me and I can also say to not be alarmed when one doesn’t seem to have the ‘right words’ or ‘ways’ to express something. Sometimes things take time to be reflected on at an individual level, only to then after some time of testing things out be able to share about it with more self-authority and a certain ease in expression, which is also something that emerges after one has been discussing/reflecting and making notes about the subject while living it out in reality for some time too.   

I share an example here. I see that one source of continuous stability whenever getting to know information or becoming aware of the majority of problems in the world – faced in the worst forms of human creations like wars, famine, corruption, abuse, violence, hatred, harm, confusion, deception, injustice, manipulation, despotism etc. – is in fact the ability to reflect these events and situations we see as ‘news’ for example within the realization and understanding that all of this that is coming up to the surface, is the externalization and re-creation of everything that has existed in our own minds. What does this mean? The world, all the ‘events’ taking place, all the disgrace, misfortune, suffering, betrayal, corruption…. And the long list of it are created through and by the attitudes, behaviors, emotions and accumulated suppressions that are now being exerted as our expression, our nature, our creations that are becoming more and more ‘in our faces’ to see what is it that we’ve become as creators in this world.

I’ve realized how over time and practice this becomes a natural way to approach information and browse through the news or get to see all the turmoil coming up in the world in all types of ways from the individual aspects like mental instabilities, stress, anger, diseases, self-sabotage, addictions, up to the ‘greater problems’ like corruption, deception, despotism transformed into wars, famine, violence, abuse… I know firsthand how it is at times hard to keep oneself stable upon diving into the deep corridors and crevasses of our reality, whether it is in the form of current grim news or getting to know more in depth mechanisms of how our world-system operates.  I have been deliberately applying a more objective or reflective stance when reading this information in order to embrace this reality as myself.

What does that practically mean? Instead of becoming reactive about the absolute absurdity we can encounter on ‘how the world system works’ right now, I instead interact with this information and deliberate do the exercise of tracing such actions and reactions to their source and origin, which is always a human being, a human mind, a person that individually or collectively has co-created a particular detrimental or destructive outcome for themselves and others. In essence, I’ve practiced a constructive form of ‘reading the news’ and translating them into an exercise of ‘reading a person’s mind’ or intent and then seeing how that also relates to me, to every one of us that has in one way or another, to varying degrees, lived that same abusive stance toward our own lives.

If this is a new perspective for you, you might be thinking ‘No way! I am not a psychopath! Not at all like those people that are called ‘politicians’ and dare to do those heinous acts, I am a decent person!’ and here I’d say hold back for a moment and let me explain, because we definitely love to ‘fight’ any realization about our own nature, we tend to immediately deny it because… who would really like to realize that we are one and equal with – oh boy, here I’ll use the trendy people that are being used as human piñatas – Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump? They are both human beings representing actually what exists in the majority of our mind and exponentially showing what ‘we are capable of’ when directing our intent to any form of personal interest.

An example on this is that I just heard a woman explaining chemtrails and associating this practice to be ordered or mandated by people that are ‘surely psychopathic’ in nature, said in a tone that is usual when we want to denote the problem only existing outside of ourselves. I’ve noticed this is one preferred term to be used to point out the ‘ludicrous’ nature of ‘them’ or ‘those’ that can devise such creation. Even if I understand that this is in essence a regular reaction to this kind of situations where ‘no one knows what it is and who is doing it,’ the aim and objective in this back to self approach when watching news or information about things we don’t regularly get to know of in our ‘main media,’ is to precisely not give into the same stance of ‘us vs. them’ mentality to place the culprits separate from us.

Instead, give one step further to investigate what is this creation as ‘chemtrails’ actually denoting or reflecting about our own current consciousness-nature as humans, what does its existence represent? And why haven’t each one of us actually truly embodied the honor and respect for life that we are demanding in to those ‘behind the curtains’ for? Why haven’t we in fact yet lived such honor and respect to our own bodies and lives in an absolute manner? Hence a single word like calling another a ‘psychopath’ which means “a person suffering from chronic mental disorder with abnormal or violent social behavior” in fact can represent all of us, since neither of us has absolutely lived as a ‘second coming of Jesus’ in the flesh to be so pure and self-honest to absolutely say and be able to stand by the words: ‘I do not act against life in any moment’.

I know firsthand as well how we like to keep ourselves in the ‘good light’ as the ‘good lights’ that research and dig out all the problems and in doing so, believe that we are digging out other’s problems and consequences, but ‘Not Mine At All!’ and that’s where we have to step down of our horses and actually live and apply humbleness, real understanding. If anyone reading this considers that they truly and absolutely honor life in every moment and every breath, I’d say it’s great, but maybe some further insight into what that would absolutely mean change one’s perspective, because there’s a ton of processes that take place in every moment in our bodies and minds that we are not aware of at all and are abusive in nature, yet we believe that ‘we only do good’ which is as well one of those masks one has to be willingly able to question and challenge if anything to then dive into the real nature of ourselves.

This is to simply say that according to what I’ve become aware of and lived in my own body: as long as we hold a mind in a body as a human being = we surely have a way to go in truly learning to honor our very own breath of life.

Therefore, what happens when calling others ‘psychopaths’  is that we create a comfortable shield to ‘look away’ from oneself, point fingers, blame, maybe provide some relevant information, but this approach where an ‘us’ vs. ‘them’ is created keeps us all going in circles without any solution, because there’s no actual self-reflection to ponder what the existence of ‘chemtrails’ reveal about ourselves, our interests, our nature, the consciousness or principles behind it, what for? What are the fears that have driven another human being like me to create such thing? And so be able to reflect such patterns, behaviors, interests back to self, to see that any of those people that ‘created’ chemtrails doesn’t have a different mind to ours, doesn’t belong to another ‘existence’ to do it, ‘they’ are still motivated by the same fears and desires as any other human being and yes, that includes me and you, no question about it.

What does this approach of ‘interacting’ with the news to read the human nature behind certain events imply? Well, it implies that after reading a particular article or hearing/watching certain information, any ‘fact’ that may be placed in any type of news I practice ‘bringing it back to myself’ =  I translate it to see what fears drove that person/organization to act or decide to do or not do a certain thing? What kind of experience was sought in doing/not doing it? What kind of mind patterns and behaviors were present in the creation or eventual consolidation of a particular outcome? What is this ‘world event’ or ‘news’ showing me about what we are as humans – our current human nature – what are we accepting and allowing and so (re)creating? 

And then I consider potential outcomes for solutions asking myself: what could be done in order to prevent this kind of outflow or consequence? What could have been provided to this/that person or group of people to consider other ways to fix their problem? What other previous causes/problems had to exist in order to create this consequence or problem and so, how can we focus on the origin and cause of those problems instead of only dealing with the surface consequence? This includes also considering what kind of solutions, support and assistance could prevent or change the origin and so outcome of this event/situation?

This approach is something I’ve been practicing because of being one of those people that would get trapped in the polarity of wanting to be ‘super informed’ about everything and all, like ‘sucking the news feed dry’ lol and then getting to a point of being ‘too fed up with everything’ becoming a bit paranoid at times, feeling disempowered and helpless/hopeless about the state of affairs of our world,  focusing ‘too much’ on the ‘out there’ and not really that much on the right-here as myself, my mind, my own patterns and behaviors which in my life led me to focus on certain evasive activities that became too confusing, sometimes destructive and keeping myself in a loop of feeling depressed and seeing ‘no way out’ for ourselves as human beings in this world.

Therefore, upon taking into consideration the realization that everything that I see around me as this world is myself/ourselves, it opens up both the door to understand the problems and so the solutions.

What becomes a prominent realization is the actual ‘evil’ in the world-system, which of course we can already explain as the evil that exists in each one of us that has become as the ‘nature of the system’ because of who we are and what exists within each one of us as the main ‘actors’ or players in this reality. Here when it comes to finding out the ‘nefarious’ and ‘draconian’ system we’ve created, I recommend to learn how to self-forgive. Because, if this entire reality is my reflection and creation, there is nothing and no one that will come and fix it, there is no punishment or vengeance that will ever sort it out except for learning to self-forgive our mistakes and abuses, individually and collectively, and so walk the process to take responsibility for such ‘evil’ within myself – which interestingly enough can be first denied, feared, neglected, then with time and perseverance to get to a self-honesty stance within oneself, can be opened up at an individual level to then – once that it is individually admitted and confronted through learning how to self-forgive: understanding what kind of behaviors, thoughts, fears can lead to oneself to think in ‘evil’ ways or ways that reverse the growth and potential of life – rather focus on first learning how to give myself another opportunity to correct my ways, my behavior in a way that becomes genuinely supportive for me and others, essentially being the living example of the kind of people I see is very much needed in this world.

This method comes with practicing a solution-based mindset throughout this process of self-support and self-responsibility, integrating the living principles that precisely rely on the consideration of what is best for all at this core and essential level that we all are existing as, which is life, existing in an equal-substance within everything and everyone. These realizations – with time and practice – become an active filter so to speak, through which I decide to actively see/look and understand what is ‘happening’ in the world, enabling me to take a more directive role in reflecting and so understanding the problems, looking at the possible solutions, the potentials to what we could create if our focus, attention, drive and determination is geared to genuinely do and create that which is best for all, not seeking to have others ‘do it’ and ‘change’ out there, but starting with oneself here.

It might sound an ‘easy’ thing to do on paper, but there are challenges that one can face when deciding to approach the world events and situations with this particular understanding. One of the obstacles is our own, dare I say, addiction to problems, to conflicts, to opposing, to being emotionally negative for example which was my case too. In my mind I was thriving to see everything just too dark, too complex to see any ‘way out’, which would feed my own sense of disempowerment and helplessness and worry as well as I have explained in previous posts. This then can be transcended (trance-ended) through getting out of – becoming directive in my mind and so body – my own brainwash of feeding emotions and instead, do something that is a rather ‘challenging’ thing to do for a person like me, which is to focus on the potential: what exists as a possibility and capacity to change within each human being, the potential that exists in the functioning of our entire system if the rules/regulations/laws/structures that we place as human beings would in fact be geared to honoring and supporting each one’s live to thrive, for all, regardless of races, languages, imaginary boundaries or creeds. In any sane mentality this sounds like the most simple thing to do, but I’ve found that in my case this is precisely the key to my own ‘deprogramming’ so to speak, and at the same time one of those challenging points to breakthrough.

Here, this relates also to the process of ‘turning one’s weakness into strength’ – example: If I saw that my usual knee-jerk reactions to seeing the state of affairs in this world was that of depression, sadness, worry, helplessness, hopelessness, seeing now way out, blame or covert ways of blame, anger and general destructive behavior towards myself and also in intent toward others, then it means I can turn all of that into a constructive way of approaching the same ‘state of current affairs’ and change the ways and attitudes with which I see reality unfold, and actually do something about it starting with myself in the way I co-create and participate in it.

What does ‘turning my weakness into strength’ means here? Developing a deliberate purpose for myself, my life to instead of giving up to see any ‘potential’ in this world, to rather prove first to myself that ability to change in my own life, in my own ‘ways and patterns’ which means turning my usual depression, hopelessness, helplessness, sadness into a solution-based mindset, using my critical or analyzing skills to understand the problem and at the same time seeing possible ways through and solutions, stopping myself deliberately from going into a form of blame and instead remind myself every time that ‘them’ and ‘those’ that I am pointing the finger at are nothing else but the greatest teachers and examples of what we have all collectively created and existed as human beings: they are Myself as well so I cannot go judging, blaming, hating myself, because I’ve proven that it leads nowhere. If anything that’s also one of the points why the whole ‘conspiracy theorist’ syndrome is an important one to debunk, where one gets so much information that one either becomes entirely helpless/hopeless and depressed to do anything about themselves and their reality around – giving up on life essentially – or they create a peculiar ‘antagonist’ stance that claims to stand for what is ‘best for everyone’ but! It just might not include the ‘ones that they point fingers as the culprits for everything!’ lol… and so the ball keeps rolling where there is no real forgiveness, no real understanding even in the groups, factions, associations and people that might have a good intent in creating a system, a solution that works for everyone, but as long as there’s any inkling of antagonizing others, a system, a person, a foundation of our reality =  we are prone to recreate the same war mentality.

 I’ve actively walked through these points toward people that I have openly judged on say YouTube for their solutions being ‘not exactly supportive’ – which I am also now in a completely different stance currently in my life around that – and also towards certain people in positions of power that I held a considerable amount of disdain too, exposing it to myself and others in my group of support to then flag the point back to myself to see how silly it is to create my own ‘human piñatas’ to blame and hate for all the ‘bad stuff’ going in the world, instead of realizing they are me as well, they are my mirror (my-error) and point to reflect on. Here again, I rather actively see what do they represent about myself, about ourselves as human beings that I can then work on aligning and correcting within me first, which starts with stopping this form of blame/anger/disdain toward ‘others’ I have placed the finger on as ‘culprits’ of anything. It goes back to self, not to ‘blame’ myself but to rather understand the futility of blame and instead turn it into a realization of self-responsibility.

What does this practically mean? To first see towards what or who in my life have I abdicated my own responsibility for – a god, ‘the mind,’ the system, my parents, my society, politicians, information, a ‘creator’ – to evade looking within me as the origin of the problem and so the solution. I’ve realized how it is only through actively doing this that one is no longer able to ‘see the problem out there’ as foreign or external to one’s own nature, because one can immediately recognize the same pattern/behavior others present as one’s own and so, what one can actively decide to live or what emerges within oneself is a form of humbleness or understanding towards others as to why they do what they do and why they are who they are.

This in turn becomes a constructive way of looking at things, a non-judgmental way of approaching the deeds and ways that others can present that we usually have either a ‘good’ or ‘bad’ reaction to, which keep us all polarized in the ‘pro’ and ‘anti’ this or that. Part of learning how to see the current reality through this new constructive filter of understanding and self-responsibility, is to not judge, to not see through morality, but to effectively learn to read the cause and consequences, actions and reactions and see them for what they are only, for the sheer purpose of understanding, learning from them and so then apply the personal interactive process of ‘taking the point back to self’ to see where and how have I done, lived or applied the same ways/patterns and reactions in my life that have also (re)created consequential outflows that cause problems in my life and that of others.

So in essence this is how from a form of disempowerment that can exist in some of us – or most of us – as a programmed form of self-limitation to give up, to wallow into the problem, to not see ‘ways out’, to feel numb, to feel inferior to ‘the powers that be’ or to feel like a ‘rat in a cage,’ one can instead decide to see the problems/situations objectively, through actively dispelling the fog and smokescreen of emotions like anger, sadness, fears, worries, helplessness, hopelessness and disempowering into seeing and recognizing the ‘main actors’ as another aspect/reflection of oneself that needs alignment, that needs correction and ultimately to realize that it can be cured/corrected/aligned or led toward a solution if some living principles or living words are ‘prescribed’ as the treatment, cure or antidote for any form of world-system disease, which of course in fact originates and emerges from… ourselves!

 

So it is so: as within so without. Therefore learning to self-forgive all of the mess that we see reflected as our world is a first way to learn to understand the problems, recognize our responsibility and so take an active role in changing ourselves from within, to eventually manifest this as our without, as the world.  

Instead of becoming overwhelmed, sad, depressed, disempowered from a wide awareness of all the things going on in people’s lives in this world, rather to focus and stick to the potential we all hold to be the solutions, to change our ways, to decide to benefit the whole instead of  only focusing on our selfish interests, to decide to challenge our ‘ingrained ways’ and do the actual self-work, self introspection and practical active engagement in self-change to be a creative force in this world, rather than a (self) destructive one.  

I embrace these living principles as the new ‘filter’ through which I decide to see my life, the ‘news’ in this world, my relationships, my own consequences and challenges and do so until this ‘new way’ becomes in fact the ‘new me’/ my new nature that also allows me to stand more as my own potential, which in turn enables me to see the potential in others as well, which is simply a result of doing and applying this to myself first.

Isn’t this a great way to start actually living life? I’d dare you to test this out and I warn you here not to hear the voices in the head that may say: “it’s not working, it feels wrong, I don’t like seeing the ‘good’, I don’t like all this ‘positivity’!” Because this is not at all a usual ‘positive spin’ or going to the ‘opposite pole’ type of solution here, but simply referencing a more self-responsible and interactive way to participate in and co-create our lives, to be really empowered and have it in our own hands so to speak.

Dare to challenge the ‘same old you’ every day upon seeing ‘the news’ or ‘state of affairs’ of your own life and that of everything/everyone in this world and see what comes out of it.

 

Thanks for reading.

 

Learn HOW to start doing this yourself :

 

Rumbos Inciertos 06

 

Other blogs to check out on the topic:

386. War Crimes are Born in the Mind
401. How to Live a ‘Change in Consciousness’?
2012 Can Self Interest be Common Sense?
Day 3– De-Capital-I-zing Me
Dysfunctional Minds
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420. From Disposable Life to Purposeful Living

 

I watched the other day a speech by Henry Giroux for ‘Disposable Life’ series wherein various philosophers and writers share their perspectives on this topic. It is cool to be able to hear a list of all the bits of points that surround us on a day to day basis as all the problems that we are continually co-creating in what he calls the ‘undoing’ of society, though I would say that we have in fact never lived such genuine meaning of ‘society’ itself, we do live together but we haven’t genuinely agreed to have a particular purpose in our lives other than fulfilling our happiness according to what we adopt and come to live out as our most popular we tend to focus on, which usually are the little aspects that make ‘our lives happy’ which are mostly linked to self-interested and fear-denial type of activities wherein we can get a sudden rush of joy to the head, only to then go all the way down ‘below cero’ into depression, stress, anxiety and a general sense of hopelessness to live. I can attest to this since I used to live like that and I would mostly spend my time formulating speeches in my head wherein I could bash humanity for the ‘stupidity’ we are, for all the greed, violence, torture, war, inability to think properly, for our passivity, for the pleasure in a spectacle of violence, for the desire to have the most ‘over the top’ lifestyle, for the sexualization and dehumanization of children, for our morbid fascinations and so on, but the reality is that over the years I realized how tiring it is to actually hear more and more complains or theories about how all went down the drain the moment we started to privatize and capitalize on what some have the privilege to own, and how we have grown to be comfortable in the arms of our captors and how we actually like to abuse ourselves…

I realized that it is really a disservice that’s being done by all of the people that have the attention and power to address the masses to only let us know what we already know in one way or another, because we are doing it already, yet provide no feasible or practical and applicable solutions; so, because complaining about ‘people not providing solutions’ would make me of course part of that choir, I have begun dedicating myself to share on a daily basis for now while I can, what I investigate throughout 24 hours, what I get to see and notice from other people’s arguments about the situation we’re facing in the world. I’ve found many are now suddenly starting to see the importance of changing ourselves first, it’s usually pronounced as the need for a change in consciousness instead of only participating in public demonstrations that as Giroux states, have become spectacles that are then stored as another memory in people’s minds = becomes irrelevant = is not sufficient.

A change in this world is definitely more than throwing tomatoes at a parliament building, or acting out ‘civil disobedience’ which has become a predictable and ‘part of the system’ type of expected tantrums from people that complain about things that directly affect the status quo of their lives. Protests have become the normalized ‘disobedience’ and that implies of course no genuine change can come from trying to fix what is broken from the get go.  This spectacle only leads to more outrage which fuels war against those that we perceive as culprits. We have to actually take our power back, but how can we ‘take our power back’ if we haven’t even realized what we are actually capable/able to be and become?

 

Pejac

Human Nature by Pejac

 

This is why it is so vital to actually focus on developing or ‘uncovering’ our real potential as individuals. I’ve seen for myself how I would have never placed myself in a position I am at the moment if I had followed through with my high & lows type of ‘gloomy’ type of mind-experience that I used to impose upon myself and project it toward ‘life on Earth’ – it’s actually quite selfish to do this, I see. It’s been fascinating to see myself back a couple of years ago wherein I would still see ‘no way out’ and every now and then cave into the realm of being in a tunnel vision wherein all that I could see was more destruction, more abuse and no way out.  Well, you see if we individually remain in such a constricted mindframe, for sure it will be simply impossible for us to even consider a ‘way out’ – why? Simple: because we see the world according to that same filter we have built as how we think, what we believe and perceive ‘the world’ and ourselves to be. So, if in my mind I am only focusing on identifying all the problems, add my own emotional input to those and then become that experience as ‘the way the world is,’ of course it will be a tad difficult to be able to see any ‘way out’ if all we see is the same filter filled with one’s emotions, limitations, continuous self- debasement and helplessness. What we haven’t realized is that this is the ‘perfect’ mindset to keep the world as is, because we do not even bother to ‘try and change it’ and I cannot sufficiently emphasize the importance of actually taking self-responsibility for that general sense of being ‘the lost generation’ where all we see is a doomed and troublesome future.

Sure with this I’m not trying to happy-paint the world here, because that would be delusional and jumping to the opposite side of the fence attempting to say ‘positive things.’ I have also realized within me that I had to actually let go and detach myself from the comfort of my own gloom and doom, because it was actually quite addictive to simply resort to the same mindframe where I wouldn’t even try or commit to any change, because all that I would think is ‘What for? Nothing will change, everything is fucked, what’s the point anyways? No one is doing it, so why should I? And as I write this, it seems ages since I would think like this, however it is not that long ago – therefore  I see the importance of sharing this realization: life in fact is not ‘fucked’ per se, we are the ones that have messed with it and so I can say that I’ve been there, done that and have actually been able to stop that inner experience and instead actually dedicate myself to ‘change’ me, which is not an attempt to become a better person either, it is simply being able to remove all the flawed starting points I had created upon my day to day living, and so rather integrate new ones that do not require me to ‘feel’ a certain way to move day by day.

 

One of the most interesting developments I’ve noticed within me is that I actually have become what I used to judge before as ‘naïve’ for example, when a person would share how they have stopped any form of self-abuse and gotten themselves ‘back on track’ I would see them as ‘phony’ because I could not perceive or believe that a person could be ‘happy’ in this world. However I’ve also realized that this is not about ‘being happy,’ as that would also be also a ‘state of mind.’ This is about recognizing and realizing how much we have underestimated ourselves, how much attention we have given to our own judgments, our own emotions such as how ‘I feel’ based on energetic experiences, how we fuel our own continuous inner-conflicts in the mind instead of waking up with a sense of what am I going to do today to continue constructing my own life in a way that I see is supportive for myself and others as well?

There is no feeling necessary from the moment we wake up, there is no need to ‘feel’ in order to live, and I know this is kind of like a mind-bending statement since we have defined our ‘existence as human beings’ according to ‘how we feel’ about things, according to our emotions and feelings – but! I am proof here that I have realized it is absolutely a waste of being, breath and life to continue tampering our potential and debasing our every moment with every single thought that goes through our minds, and experiences we become in our bodies with which we react to by hooking ourselves emotionally to them and believing that such ‘inner experience’ is in fact an expression of us ‘being alive.’ Nope, that’s just acting by preprogrammed design of the mind, and that means it is the expected trap we continue falling into the moment that we believe that all those flaws and lacks, limitations and fears is in fact ‘who we are’ when it is not, at all.

Even though it may seem so simple to say ‘great! I’m not going to focus on the problems and focus on the solutions now!’ it is a rather detailed and meticulous process of investigating to what extent every moment that we ‘live’ is defined by our behavioral patterns of the mind based on thoughts, feelings, emotions as beliefs, ideas, perceptions, judgments, fears etc. A change in consciousness is necessary for change, correct – however the point is not to ‘change consciousness’ but to understand who we are and have become as ‘consciousness’ to then be able to understand that the problem is when we try and use the same flawed tool of perception to ‘fix things’ when it is definitely not about ‘fixing ourselves’ but rather realizing we don’t have to use the same old tools, the same old ‘way of looking at things,’ the same old starting point to create genuine change within and without of ourselves

Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.

Albert Einstein

 

Genuine self-change is thus the ability to first understand who we are as the mind and with that, discover the real power we have suppressed within ourselves from the moment that we accept the belief and idea of something or someone being ‘more’ than ourselves, being ‘above’ us or in charge of our lives. We have actually become comfortably numbed by this idea of someone or something else taking care of us, and that’s what is the greatest problem we’re facing: we’re apathetic because we believe we have ‘no say’ in how things operate – but that has to absolutely be exposed for the form of mind control it in fact is: we are not governing ourselves, we are not directing ourselves in our own bodies and mind, we have not even learned how to properly live our lives and care for our own bodies – this is about realizing and seeing for the first time how it is that everything we have thought ourselves to be is in fact a manufactured lie that follows the same patterns and systems we have co-created in reality to keep all the bunch of lies in place.

 

If we are all tired of lies, deception, corruption, fear mongering, violence, wars, protests, abuse and inequality in this world: then we have to actually become the solution to all of these things beginning with ourselves, we have to be the example of what it means to live as an honorable, trustworthy, reliable, self-supportive, cooperative and self-responsible individual that ensures that one’s genuine ‘self-interest’ is redefined as the consideration of what is best for all, as that also includes oneself in it. 

Once again, saying it or writing it out is easier than actually living it. It is a hard working process, for sure, no one said it was going to be something that ‘magically appears’ out of nowhere, becomes our new principle and we’re suddenly all changed. Just consider that every single habit we live by every single day is precisely the accumulation of all days of our lives that we have lived and applied such behavioral and emotional patterns. Therefore, it will take quite a self-willed resolution to change, it takes one’s volition as the understanding of why we decide to stop certain thoughts, fears, self-limitations, self-abusive and destructive habits in order to continually remind ourselves that this is a constant application of changing ourselves in every single moment that we are alive, until we no longer have to ‘remind us,’ because we would have simply gotten to integrate these new living principles within ourselves.

This is the foundation of a genuine democracy, and this is a word to simply be realized as the power of the people, the power that we actually have if we first recognize and develop ourselves to live to our utmost potential. Once again, sounds ‘great!’ but it does require an actual letting go of all the comfortable excuses, justifications and fears we use to not give that actual step outside of such self-abusive comfort zone. It takes guts, yes, it takes courage to live in self-honesty, yes – though this is what is required of us if we do want to genuinely step in and change the way the world is operating right now.

 

If there’s something I can see I am developing through focusing on my own change and in investigating solutions, co-working and talking with people that are also focusing on solutions, is that this is the new ‘flame’ so to speak, the genuine passion to live that I never thought I could encounter within me, and I am thus grateful to be able to share it as a way to ‘pass the torch’ and get a genuine sense of ‘illumination’ to first realize that in order to ‘change the world,’ we first have to get outside of our own little thought-box, our own bubble, to see beyond our tunnel vision, to stop all the excuses to not do this such as blame and self-hatred and get rid of our constant desire to complain about things – it’s time we actually grow up as human beings – teenage years are over – it’s time to mature and actually get to see the great potential we have if we all stop living as victimized ‘emos’ and start developing real skills that are useful to create a world that is best for all.

 

More and more people are ‘waking up,’ but there’s always the same loop of not knowing ‘how to follow through’ with such decision to be part of the solutions to this world. Therefore, I can share  all the entries on this blog as a process that any individual can walk for themselves to start dissecting each mind particle we have become, be able to self-forgive to recognize our responsibility to what we had become and so, plant new seeds of living principles that we are willing to water each and every single day to genuinely grow and get to be benefited by the fruit of our labor so to speak, which is the work that we do on ourselves just as we all work day to day to make our world and lives function. This is the new meaning of life, not a disposable life, but a purposeful life that exists as a potential in each one of us, so let’s live our lives, day to day with the realization that it is now or never that we begin prioritizing what really matters to be done in this world.

See you around if you are ready for this.

 

life-isn-t-life-without-honor

 

Suggested read:

Day 606: Self Discipline & Resistance

Day 603: We’re All in This Together

Day 176: Annoyed With Whiners

Day 626: Fake it Till You Become it

Day 273: CEOs are easy to blame – but how are we the same as them?

 

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229. Not Understanding the Mind leads to Insanity

Self-Addiction to Emotions and Feelings as ‘Who We Are’ = Self Interest

Elitist Character: Mental Disorders Hide us From Self Responsibility – Self Forgiveness and Self Corrective Application

220. Drug Culture: Mad Society as a Lifestyle

 

 

“the Mind/Energy will ‘fight’ for its Polarities, its relationships, its For/Against definitions, because in this process – it maintains friction/conflict, which is what fuel the existence of the Mind, which is what fuels the existence of this very World System, which fuels the attention-diversion/distraction of the Majority of Humanity to be preoccupied in Polarities, Polarity definitions, fuelling separation “divide and conquer” – while the Minority Elite take the reins of Humanity/life on earth – cause no-one is willing to give-up/let go of their Polarity, their Personality Definitions and actually UNDERSTAND ALL THINGS and align them into and as equal and one Solutions for ALL.” – Sunette Spies*

 

Self Forgiveness on who I shaped myself to be as my emotions and feelings.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to accept the energy of friction and conflict as ‘who I am’ within my mind without realizing that it was a part of me that I believed I had a ‘right’ to exist as, because: it is coming from me, it must be me – and in this abdicate my very first awareness to the thoughts in my mind as ‘who I am’ and ‘what I am,’ and from that moment on, losing any perspective to question my thoughts and experiences coming up in the mind and felt in my physical body, but instead simply continued to believe that this inner experience of friction and conflict had a reason’ to be inside me and such, begin defining ‘who I am’ according to my mind, the nature of my thoughts, how I experienced myself as thoughts, emotions and feelings wherein my attention then centralized and focused on Me, My Mind, How I feel, beginning to neglect the rest of the beings and reality in itself just because of being focused on ‘who I am as the mind,’ missing out even the reality of myself as my own physical body within this mind-mode.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to actually use and fuel my own self conversations as a form of entertainment and re-assuring that ‘I am this mind,’ because the process of identifying myself ‘as my mind’ became solid as a child and as such, having this be confirmed by people around me when they started to identify me with a certain character like being ‘angry’ or ‘too aloof’ or ‘too conflictive’ or spoiled, which lead me to continue growing up believing that there was a ‘problem’ within me and that I was not normal/ not as other kids because of having this inner-conflict within me of any kind really,  that I could not ‘sort out’ but believe that ‘this is who I am/ I was born like this/ there is no solution’ – within this

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to believe that this friction and conflict is something that defines me and that I would have to bear with the rest of my life, that there was no questions about it and that I would most likely end up like the adults, being able to ignite in extreme anger in one moment and not be able to stop, which indicates how I became aware of emotions as the aspect I resonated more with, which became a point of identification just because of what I had been exposed to in my reality as a child, which then defined ‘who I am’ according to these surges of anger  and distress that I would experience but was not able to solve within myself, therefore accepting these surges of energy as incontrollable/ unstoppable and ‘who I am,’ which is how I have come to accept the totality of the mind as myself without a question.

 

I realize that yes, the mind represents everything that we have accepted and allowed ourselves to separate ourselves from as ‘our nature’ as humanity which is not of harmony or completion or stability or benevolence, but, of actual evil as the reverse of life as all aspects of separation that we accepted and allowed ourselves to become. This is how I realize that I accepted conflict as a ‘problem’ within myself – just as any other human being – and that due to not knowing how others would also experience themselves, I created a point of specialness as in having some form of ‘anomaly’ for having these ups and down experiences which I identified as being actions that only ‘crazy people’ would have/ experience, eventually wearing the tag as a way to justify my inner conflict and even take proud of that because in one way or another, I was justifying my own personality as ‘special’ and ‘unique’ for having this ways of being which I actually fooled/ kid myself to believe I had no control of, when in fact as I review  such moments, I realize I absolutely was aware of what I was doing and how what I did was a deliberate point of causing and instigating conflict within myself as entertainment and others, because it just felt ‘good.’

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to use friction and conflict within me as a point of self-infatuation and entertainment wherein I began only focusing on ‘How I felt’ in every moment wherein I was given the option to ‘feel good’ or ‘feel bad’ and define everything in my life according to likes and dislikes that became points/  aspects of self identification by people in my environment as ‘who I am,’ and within this

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to believe that because people were okay with having things that they like and dislike or specific characteristics/ moods/ preferences, I was able to then do the same and seek the most unique ways to exist in comparison to them, which is how everything that I perceived as ‘normal’ around me, became my standing point to define myself as everything that I would be ‘against’ to, without realizing that it was never ‘Me’ as a physical being living at all, but just existing as a mind that would lead to define oneself according to standing ‘against’ the majority, standing against/ opposing one’s “normal-environment,” only for the purpose to have a way to stand as a ‘different’ or ‘authentic’ personality defined in opposition to others, and in this only fueling and supporting the separation, the friction and conflict that ensued from that moment on in my life,  wherein

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to within this identification of who I am as the mind, I defined ‘who I am’ according to being ‘the opposite’ to what my family and peers at school represented, and as such, build  my own specialness and security within these definitions at a mind level, which only lead me to every time seek to upgrade my ‘personality’ and preferences, characteristics as a way to not only then antagonize my family or people at school, but the world system in itself in a spiteful mode that I took on toward everything and everyone, without realizing that everything that I spiting at all times was only myself when and while neglecting my very own physical body and the substance that I am as life, using it to power and fuel my  mindfucks, literally, which is unacceptable – therefore

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to accept this culture of ‘personality cultivation’ and creation based on defining me as a particular character with preferences and temperament as all the thoughts, beliefs, ideas and opinions I started creating as ‘my point of view’/ my way of being, without realizing that every single definition that I took on as myself became just another way to define myself As something that would invariably stand within one pole that would create friction/ conflict/ react to the opposite pole as another definition to which I would invariably react to, as I had to somehow ‘defend’ myself as My definition whenever the opposite would present itself in my reality.

I realize that I always had one moment before reacting wherein I would actually decide to ‘role play’ my part and react to that which I was supposed to react to based on my preferences, my personality and that which I defined would make me ‘angry’ or ‘mad’ or happy or sad or excited based on the preferences and personality that I began cultivating as a child as ‘who I am.’

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to ‘fill the character’ that I became by my own apparent ‘will’ to do so, and do, react, say and speak the way that I had built myself to be, do, act and speak like, within this complying to the social norm of becoming a character that is predictable and would react against/ oppose or like that which is defined as the oppostite polarity of myself. Within this also,

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to ‘follow through’ with my own script throughout the years and continue fulfilling the reactive character every time that I was almost expected to ‘fulfill the character,’ which is how I realized that the personalities that I created were mostly  ‘a show’ for others, a way to stand in self-importance, specialness, uniqueness and in that learned to only focus on my self, fulfill myself, react when I was expect to do and never question again this as something that could be stopped, because, I had already ‘gotten married’ with the idea of myself/ gotten too much into character, which then became a Lie I had to follow through with and eventually it integrated fully as ‘who I am’ over the years and that was it. I believed that I could not ‘change me’ and stop participating in the character because of the fear of ‘who would I be without it,’ not realizing that the only thing that fears stopping self definitions is the mind, not who we really as as a physical body that is actually being abused and neglected throughout our developmental processes in the mind wherein we are only focused on cultivating our characters and self-experience.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to believe that the inner conflict experienced would always be with me and that I would grow up to be as angry/ neurotic as the adults I was aware of in the family, and that I would end up being somehow sick and with some form of mental problem or disorder as well as an emotional problem – such as chronic depression or constant worry and stress – without ever really having investigated how this all was just part of me having identified myself with my thoughts, feelings and emotions as ‘who I am’ as well as adopting the ‘ways of being’ from the characters around me in the family/ society, and as such, believing that I had something ‘wrong’ within me because the inner conflict would not go away – hence believing that I was invariably going to have a ‘disease/ sickness/ mental problem’ at a later stage in life – hence

 

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to realize to what extent there is ignorance in humanity with regards to the nature of how the mind works, wherein one single energetic experience was perceived as something utterly ‘wrong,’ or a malfunction, anomaly or disease because of how we’ve programmed ourselves to believe that what we see on TV or as the façade of each other as ‘harmonious,’ ‘happy’ and naturally joyful beings was in fact ‘real’ and had to be ‘who we are,’ without realizing it is a masquerade to hide the actual fear, stress, depression that is experienced within, as that is the nature we have all accepted and allowed ourselves to be and become as the mind, fueling this constant belief that we have to ‘keep up with the positive’ while all the time we experience this inner-conflict when participating in thoughts, feelings and emotions that veered toward the opposite and no matter how we categorize our experiences as positive or negative, they all represent a point of conflict which indicates energy which is of the mind and as such, able to be stopped and self corrected as a point of Self Responsibility.

 

I realize that this  ‘incongruence’ of my inner experience and the outer experience I was supposed to present, created a rift within myself believing that ‘there was something wrong with me,’ and this mostly being talked about in the media as mental disorders and being depressed or having low self esteem, being addicted to a form of self-abuse, belittlement and all of that which was considered as a mental problem/ a Grave problem, which I then kept quiet about and kept a well placed façade of ‘everything is fine, I am perfectly normal,’ even within my dissident/ antagonist characters, but ‘normal,’ and such, veering toward other ways to ‘make sense’ of my inner conflict, leading me nowhere but further confusion and relationships that supported this inner conflict, which became the focus on my life, trying to make sense of it through others, through living the lives of others and avoiding looking at my own, becoming friends with and having relationships that I thought I could use as a way to sort out my own inner conflict through others, instead of focusing on my own and within this, only aggravating the inner conflict that I kept for myself all the time, out of fear of actually having to ‘ask for help.’  Within this

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to label these energetic experiences as ‘mental disorders’ to that are in fact the ‘normal’ workings of the mind within how it  operates and understanding that for that matter, all human beings could be labeled as having some ‘mental disorder’ because The Mind in itself works through friction and conflict that we perceive as our emotions and feelings and thoughts, inner conversations, backchat – therefore there was not going to be in any way a ‘mental health’ or stability possible as long as we would seek only to make people ‘happy’ and ‘positive’ and get their ‘motivation’ back up, which is why and how I always resisted having any support because it seemed to phony to just veer to the positive and ‘be happy’ while the reality that I was witnessing, was nothing but happy for everyone, was nothing but harmonious wherein I would witness a world that was existing in constant fights and problems with money, politicians, poverty, wars and all of this only meaning to me one thing: this world is crazy and so am I, within this

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to use the excuse of ‘the state of the world’ as a way to justify my experience as being ad hoc to the state of the world – madness, instability, depressio, crisis – hence the entire characterization of ‘the sensitive being’ that reacts to what others apparently would not see, and in this becoming even more self absorbed in my own emotional experiences about the world, linking that to ‘art’ and ending up victimizing myself, believing that ‘there is no way out, it’s the devil’s way now’ which is how I see obviously even the music that I would hear would support this entire ‘depressed’ character not because I was not being supported to live – that’s why it is the elitist character, because I was not suffering a physical life of Lack of money/ health/ poverty or abuse – but I was only focusing on cultivating these emotions and ‘sensitivity’ to the world as a point of self interest, because of having learned how ‘artists were sensible beings’ and I actually made people accept me as ‘different’ due to this so-called ‘sensitivity’ and ‘specialness’ that I built in within myself, getting completely in this character that was probably even ‘allowed’ to be alone, isolated, depressed because of the same character of which I also expected to make a ‘name’ of myself for,  and justify my non-compliance to the system as well as defending my ‘point of view’ to not even attempt to create a change within the system itself – in essence: the ultimate justification to Not stand up for my life and the life of this world in equality.

 

All the time that I only cultivated my personality, my inner conflict, my dissatisfaction with life, my helplessness, my worry, my concern, my sadness toward the world, my depression, my confusion about people, my judgmental experiences of opposition toward ‘the world system,’ my desires to just ‘fly away’ and be out of the system, desires to expose the ‘ugly through something beautiful’ in some form of expression were again only actions, words cultivating a character within me, wherein I was not actually willing to investigate my self-experience, my mind and How I had created it, but only ‘get the most of it’ and making it into an acceptable character in society which is why I veered toward arts/ humanitarian studies and ‘dissed’ my apparent potential to become something else because of getting into this ‘sentimental character’ that was apparently my ‘humane’ aspect to cultivate as ‘my real personality’ – thus

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to believe that I had to cultivate my emotions  in order to be on the side of those that were ‘alive’ and could see the world and be sad about it and depressed and feel ‘misunderstood,’ which became really just another self-interest game where I would only remain as a victim, living in constant drama and this belief of there being something ‘wrong’ within me because of not being ‘happy’ and ‘joyful’ naturally – without realizing that:

I had never in fact understood how the mind functioned and how even if I was addicted to feeling sad, sorry for myself, depressed and victimized all the way, is still the same as fixating on everything that is positive, happy and joyful that I criticized extensively in the past, which proves the ignorance toward our own mind wherein we believe that we are somehow being more ‘responsible’ for being sad/ gloomy/ angry at the world when it is just another way to focus on our own experience and not really at all looking at the world and realizing that there are solutions required that will not be solved with us ‘feeling bad’ about it, that’s just blatant self-interest and an actual defense mechanism to not become a sound being that can stand in the face of reality and take absolute self responsibility for ourselves/ the world here as breath, which is what I have realized within this process: we cannot sustain this self-interested experiences of ups and downs and seeking happiness or being subsumed in depressions- which is the same thing – but actually stop participating in all forms of energetic experiences and focus on integrating ourselves to our physical body here as breath, that does Not require to have a particular ‘stance’ toward the world as an experiencing ourselves to do, be, say and act toward what’s best for all.

 

I commit myself to expose how our energetic fixations of the mind as desires, wants and needs – as well as rejections, denials, suppressions – represent the ‘who we are’ as the mind that functions through energy, which is who we have become as consciousness and within this, exposing how we have diminished ourselves in the physical to these limited characters that fight and define one against the other with no ability to actually create solutions, stand up for that which matters, because we are so busy trying to sort out our inner experiences, without even looking at the consequences that are ensuing from such self-experience as a drug of the mind. And so

 

I commit myself to stop any mind fixation within me either perceived as positive or negative and any participation in the self-definition of who I have been as a point of  preference or habit in order to finally be able to stand as  a sound stable physical being that can be effective to be self directive, self-motivated to establish solutions in this world and stop wallowing in any form of self experience as the result of seeing ‘the state of the world’ as that is only but a mechanism of defense to continue existing as a mind that ‘feels’ and ‘becomes emotional’ but establishes no solutions to the problems we’ve created, which is our responsibility at all times.

 

I commit myself to expose how our ‘mental instability’ is nothing ‘out of this world,’ but the mechanism of how the mind works and for this, realizing that reducing ourselves to have some form of ‘mental instability’ is the ultimate self-incapacitation in order to believe that we are not ‘strong enough’ or ‘good enough’ or ‘capable enough’ to stand up to create solutions in this world.

 

I realize that the moment we focus on our mind problems/ inner experience, we absolutely miss out the reality that is here and this is how it is imperative for all of us to get to a point of constancy and consistency as the stability that we are able to all live by here as Breath, as life in the physical, so that we no longer get distracted by our energy fixes of the mind as ‘problems’ and ‘instabilities’ that are self created just as another attention diversion aspect within our worlds.

 

I commit myself to expose how it is only possible for us people that have enough food to eat, a place to live and education to be focusing on this ‘inner experience’ due to having ‘more time’ to spend wondering in the mind instead of being physically working and participating in activities that are related to actually contributing to life on Earth. This is how depression and any other form of mental instability that can be identified as ‘mental disorder’ hence an apparent  “drug-required disease,” is just another way to make money for the pharmaceutical companies that use this ‘weakness’ within the human mind in a capitalist world to believe that emotions and feelings are a disease that can be controlled or healed with chemicals/drugs, instead of actually investigating one’s life to see how these ‘disorders’ were entirely self created, accepted and allowed and as such take responsibility for them, in order to not only correct oneself in one’s living and physical stability, but also to support establishing conditions in this world through education and the necessary changes in the entire system so that whichever system-deficiency is able to be identified as a problem that propitiates this mental problems, we create a solution for, which implies the implementation of the Equal Money System to ensure that people are no longer subject to a survival mode that feeds this inner conflict of the mind, but instead we are able to focus on re-establishing our living conditions to that which is optimal and supportive to be Living in this world as physical beings and no longer existing of/ as friction and conflict in the mind, feeding each other’s mind-realities and instead, support each other to ground ourselves as the physical, stop living as characters and work together to create a world that is based on life in equality.

 

— I will continue with looking at how these energetic experiences of the mind as emotions and feelings causing inner conflict, were reduced to being ‘mental disorders’ of the mind wherein we made an illness of something that is each individual’s point of self responsibility to correct, stop and align to the physical living wherein the focus must always be to stand as beings that support life in Equality with All – and within this, for once and for all, stop supporting each other’s inner-instabilities as ‘who we are’ and dare to call that a human crisis instead of a human problem caused by ourselves and resolved by ourselves individually.

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Emotions and Feelings are Self Interest – Stop the Self-Addiction

 

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