181. Waiting for the Ideal Moment to Write

Another point is how I have seen how I have this idea that If I am working on something, I have to ‘shut down’ from anything else in order to just focus on this one single task to complete, no matter how long it takes – which is an aspect of my personality linked to being rather extremist when I commit myself to do something, and within this leaving behind/ not giving attention/ not maintaining the rest of my activities with proper attention. Somehow it is as if I want to ‘redeem’ myself, my initial procrastination and getting it done all the way, in one go – which is once again based on a consideration of the mind in me wanting to ‘make up for it’ instead of simply continuing to now do it on a regular basis.

This, as ‘seemingly unimportant’ as it might be, it actually constitutes one of the most used excuses and justifications to not work on this, because in my mind I have made this idea or belief that I must simply get it done in one go and not having to do ‘anything else BUT the task at hand’ – wherein things like ‘oh I won’t have time to eat’ and wanting to shut down any form of communication with others as if this was a distraction emerge, thus it is a recurrent thinking process wherein I hold this ‘ideal’ of having the time and disposition to do so. By ‘time’ I mean having an entire day or more of just having to focus on that, not having to do any other point of responsibility and essentially it’s like being secluded in order to ‘get it done,’ which is of course extremist and in separation of reality wherein if my body would for example make such drastic decisions such as ‘not wanting to digest my food for one day,’ I could have gotten ill or even died for that. Therefore, it is a mind-delusional requirement and almost a requisite that I’ve created as part of linking this particular writing to some ‘book writing’ and ‘being a writer’ as the ideal of not having to do Anything else but writing.

This is backchat that I mostly play out in a self-accepted manner in both ways: the ‘negative’ and the ‘positive’, meaning, that I’ve made it alright to simply drop a particular task for undefined amount of time and/ or go to the extreme of wanting to JUST dedicate myself absolutely and completely to that one single task to ‘get it done’ and forget about everything else, wherein I then create an experience of seeing ‘everything else’ as a nuisance and an obstacle to ‘achieve my aim’ – even within the wording we can see how there’s an energetic drive to it, wherein I am not really considering the process of writing myself as a self-supportive process, but mostly only following my own needs in relation to trying to ‘make up for it’ as the amount of time I did not regularly spent working on it – regularly being the solution here – and instead, go into the extreme of wanting to get it done as fast as possible.

However, the ‘thing’ that happens is that I end up only seeking for this ‘one whole day that I can dedicate myself to it to get it done’ and eventually not get to ‘that whole day’ as I have obviously several points to attend as my responsibility throughout the day.

The picture that came to mind is from that movie ‘the Hours’ and how the character of Virginia Wolf would spend her days in her room writing and not really having to attend anything else – or so I got that ‘idea’ from the movie of course – I remember my backchat within that was ‘How cool! She only has to focus on writing and have her cool time to go out for a walk (read the blog: 175. My Sacred Time of the Day) and just write and write and write’ awesome, I want to be like that! And so within this, I created this belief ever since then that, in order for me to focus on some ‘writing project’ I basically require the life of a ‘writer’ as I used to read about the lives of all these writers that I admired and how they would wake up really early to write and then follow throughout their day doing the same. So all of these and many more are background conditions, not to mention the ‘inspiration’ that I thought was required to write as well. So we can call these the ‘ideals for perfect writing time’ which are based on other people’s lives and conditions within what I have judged as an ‘easy life’ of simply having to indulge in writings and seemingly having others doing their responsibilities at hand, such as taking care of the house, making money or even taking care of children.

So, here I have the ‘ideal’ aspect which can form part of the imagination, however it is not that it comes up as an entire play out in itself, but more of a belief of how the external and internal conditions must be in order to write.

Self Forgiveness on the Fantasy that I’ve held as the Ideal Imaginary moment to write:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hold the backchat ‘I have to shut down from anything else in order to focus on this one single task to complete it, no matter how long it takes’ wherein I am seeking to have this one ‘empty-tasked’ day to do this, and every time that I have made it as a point to myself to do it in this or that day, I end up postponing simply because I cannot simply ‘unplug’ myself from my reality in order to have this ‘extended period of time’ to just focus on this. I realize that in my desire to fulfill and make up for the time that I did not regularly work on this document, I then go into the extreme of wanting to ‘solve it at once,’ without realizing that this is mostly impossible since everything requires a process and my exigencies of wanting to redeem myself toward this task will most certainly not be able to be fulfilled as easy as just wanting to have it done/ complete in one go – thus

When and as I see myself seeking and ‘looking forward’ for the next weekend to have an entire day wherein I can work on my document, I stop and I breathe – I realize that in this I am actually limiting my ability to work on the document for a fixed amount of time/ hours a day, instead of wanting to do it in one go as per mind’s exigencies and instead , proceed to work on it regularly for hours a day in order to realize that this is and will be part of the daily tasks and process that will be required until it is done – thus,

I commit myself to stop looking for an ‘empty task day’ to work on this document, as I realize that there are no such days and that I can simply direct myself to fix the hours of the day in order to work with this and within that, making it part of the daily habits that I must work on.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make this point ‘more’ than any other point in my every day living, wherein within this experience toward the document as it being ‘more’ than any other writing or task I have to do, I in fact ensue the separation toward actually doing it, because of believing that I require a lot of time and the proper ‘setting’ to do it, the proper ‘momentum’ which is nothing else but a mind-generated drive toward the tasks that I have at hand.

When and as I see myself going to extremes of thinking ‘Oh I won’t have time to eat today, I cannot keep myself in communication with others because they are a distraction’ I stop and I breathe – I realize that these statements and others indicating ‘stopping doing something else because of seeing it as a waste of time’ is only based on me now wanting to redeem myself, as ‘my time’ dedicated to this task that I simply put aside for a long period of time. Thus

I commit myself to not try and ‘make up for’ the time I didn’t work on something – I face the consequences within the realization that it will take the necessary time and process to get it done, while combining it with my every day tasks and responsibilities as I see and realize that the ‘ideal’ of wanting to have an entire day ‘just for that’ is simply not possible and within holding this ‘ideal’ I have mostly created my own obstacles in my mind – thus I assist and support myself to distribute my time in order to dedicate hours a day to this document and realize that I don’t have to ‘aim’ to complete it in one go, as that would be only wanting to keep myself in a positive-experience of ‘having done it,’ instead of walking the process of doing it just as any other task/ point in my reality.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire having the life of ‘a writer’ wherein I had actually ‘dreamed’ and ‘fantasized’ quite a lot about being a writer and having a specific setting to ‘write’ and within this particular setting as a comfortable environment to write, I envisioned that I would require to be near nature and having no noise around me, having someone else cooking for me and doing my basic responsibilities and me simply being there, drinking coffee and writing and going for strolls around my own garden – lol – as I see and realize that even if this was a ‘made up illusion’ obviously, I do consider the point and aspect of having ‘no noise around’ as the ideal point that I have to Have in order to be able to ‘concentrate’/ focus on this task, which is why the least ‘noise’ is rather an excuse to postpone it and also because of not precisely living in ‘the country side’ but in a constantly noisy neighborhood in the city – thus,

When and as I see myself wanting to have this ‘perfect picture’ of the ideal moment, ideal place and conditions to write such as being near nature, having no noise around, having someone else doing my responsibilities, having a garden/ nature to walk around on, drinking lots of coffee and essentially having a picture-perfect room/ setting in order to write and be ‘comfortable’ within writing a particularly ‘long’ document –I stop and I breathe – I realize that these imagination pictures that I have created are based on a movie, and are based on my ‘ideals’ that in no way have a correlation to physical reality, as we all require food to eat, money to earn, relationships to attend and a world to be aware of essentially in order for that writing to be in itself even a writing, as what else could we write about if it wasn’t about our experiences and realizations within the ‘real world’ which is not always quiet, wherein one does not always live in a perfect country side, nor has someone else to pay for in order to do one’s responsibilities –thus, I stop participating within these ideals that only become a rather absurd obstacle for me to not write, as I see and realize that these conditions and ‘terms’ that I have created in order to feel ‘absolutely at ease’ to be writing this particular document, implies that I have made of this document something ‘more’ than myself and any other task and that I have created this belief that it must be ‘perfect’ and as such be written within a ‘perfect’ moment/ environment – thus

I commit myself to stop creating the beliefs that I must be in and require specific settings and inspiration in order to write, as I realize that these are just mind exigencies that I have created in my mind, which have become excuses to not get to a certain task simply because I would rather ‘wait’ for that perfect moment and setting wherein all is apparently ‘done and fine’ and so ‘I can write till I drop,’ which is obviously not realistic at all.

I commit myself to stop making an imagination point an excuse and justification for me to not work on something within the expectation of having possibly ‘in the future’ a ‘perfect moment’ to write, which doesn’t exist as I am actually able and capable of simply deciding to work on something and that is it, the work and written document is not dependent on a feeling, or an experience of ‘inspiration’ which is part of the mindfuckism that comes when thinking about writing a document that is not precisely self forgiveness or writing myself. I stop separating one writing as being more/ less than the other and focus on simply doing it.

 

More to come …

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Lugar ideal (ideal place) 2003

 

Blogs:

• Day 181: After Death Communication – Part 30

• Walking through WALLS: DAY 181

 

 

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• Life Review – The Relationship between Fear, Guilt and Shame

• Life Review – My Life as a Bully

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177. Imagining Positive Outcomes as Conditions to Move

Imagination Reactions – Procrastination Character

Positive Imagination

Within this, the imagination of a ‘better thing to do’ such as simply going out for a walk and imagining the entire play out of having a ‘cool time’ within it forms part of the immediate thought and imagination that covers-up the points I reviewed in the last blog in relation to the negative imagination.

The other future projection is exactly the opposite of what I have imagined/ pictured myself in within the point of confrontation with the ‘jury’ and instead of having them bashing my work, praising and ‘loving it’ which is how I then also create this laxity and sensation within me of relief, or even expectation as an experience wherein all of this is happening in my mind with no actual physical ‘input’ so to speak to actually simply get this done and stopping future-projections that only serve my own mind-interest instead of giving myself direction in the physical.

As I had explained as well, walking as the ‘sacred time of the day’ within my routine, as that untouchable aspect that I have defined as a ‘must do no matter what’ and how I can implement this same drive toward any other point/ activity in my reality.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react with excitement to going out for a walk due to how I have defined this experience of walking outside as a positive thing to do within my day, yet it has been used to also distract myself to get to the positive point in my day and avoid looking at the rest of the points that also require my attention and equal-input to get them done thus

When and as I see myself reacting with enthusiasm and excitement and be just ‘ready’ to go out for a walk, I stop and I breathe – I realize and make sure that I am not using this as an excuse to leave what I have to do ‘for later’ and excusing myself with further self-talk of why I should go outside – thus

I commit myself to make the decision to go outside based on how I have covered my basic priorities during the day or not – as I realize that it is within this excitement and expectation of going outside that I suddenly ‘let everything go’ and justify it with ‘giving myself some time’ but from the perspective of actually pushing aside/ covering up the initial negative experience that I am in fact trying to ‘make alright’ through the positive experience of going out for a walk, which is not acceptable.

I commit myself to expand and express myself as ‘steadfastness’ toward every activity that I commit myself to do, as this is what I see and realize assists and support me to not allow myself to go into thoughts, pictures, imagination about ‘doing something’ but simply giving myself direction in a physical manner, not allowing myself to have ‘second thoughts’ about things.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to imagine myself within a situation of facing/ confronting and exposing my written document to more people and them reacting with amazement and delight about what I have to say, creating a positive experience within me in that moment of being imagining this such as a warm sensation in my stomach and creating this upliftment within me that I am only making up in my mind and experienced at a physical level, without seeing and realizing that I am in fact NOT doing anything physically but only up there entertaining myself in my mind with positive outcomes and expectations that have no foundation in any way whatsoever but mere desires and delusions of grandeur – thus

 

When and as I see myself imagining myself in this future projection moment of presenting my work to more people, I stop and I breathe – I realize that this positive experience is a cover up for the fear of having the exact opposite happening in reality within the same situation as a negative experience – thus I realize that in order to DO something, I don’t require to future project, I don’t require to have either a positive or a negative experience, it is only about myself being congruent with my doings and commitments that I am pressing here and stop all mind-entertainment that serves no other purpose but making it ‘alright’ within my mind to simply not do things and believing that ‘somehow’ it will all turn out just fine, which is the laxity that must be stopped in order to get to the physical points that must be done.

I commit myself to stop imagining pictures, moments with more people ‘praising my work’ and within this reacting with a positive experience of upliftment, grandeur, importance that is only founded upon my mind, my secret desires to ‘win’ no matter what and be ‘recognized’  – I realize that within these seemingly ‘innocent’ participation in the mind, I am in fact abdicating the self responsibility toward actual physical DOING and instead, I am getting a physical high of thoughts in my head, which proves to what extent I have allowed myself to use my physical body as a self-projector of ‘good experiences’ while leaving the actual DOING for ‘another time,’ which implies that imagination as a positive experience is also another way to procrastinate and delude ourselves into a positive outcome without any real foundation of it as a physical-doing.

I realize that indulging in imagination is also a way to suit my needs and ‘soothe my fears’ like covering them up with something ‘better to think,’ instead of realizing that this is not about a Thinking process but a Doing that does not require me to project a future certain outcome that I can create a point of ‘satisfaction’ about, without physically first doing it.

This reveals how I have tended to only ‘move’ myself based on having a certainty of ending up ‘winning’ having the result that ‘I expect/ that I want’ and when this is not  in place, I do not do it because of actually being fearing the ‘negative outcome’ within all of this, which is how I comfort myself with ‘positive outcomes’ without realizing how either/or positive or negative are equally abusive in fact.

 

Thus, equalizing myself to the physical dimension of reality implies: I do not require to have ‘certainty’ created in my mind toward doing something, I simply require to just do it.

I realize that I do not require to have a positive input or drive to do things through imagining a ‘reward’ of sorts for doing it, that would be conditioning myself to only move according to there being ‘something in it for me.’

I realize that If I am here to stand for an equal and one self-movement as the physical, there has to be no energetic drive existent within me to ‘feel like doing something’ – I instead, take a deep breath, recognize that breath as the physical living-force is all I really require to get things done.

More to come

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Blogs:

• Character Dimensions – PHYSICAL/BEHAVIOUR Dimension (Part 4): DAY 177

• Day 176: After Death Communication – Part 25 : Learn about Steadfastness

Interviews:

• Life Review – I’m not Good Enough

• Life Review – High Expectations for my Child’s Future

• Life Review – Only this ONE last Time…

171. Self-Talk to be Lazy

How many times have talked to ourselves in a very nice and enticing way to do something instead of another? How have we accepted and allowed ourselves to make it ‘okay’ to talk to ourselves in the first place – and this is where the realization that the voices in our head/ how we talk ourselves into a point is something that MUST be walked within our process of getting to know who we are as the mind. Why? Because a single thought is the activation of an integration that we had throughout our lives as a particular way we have assessed reality according to the mind instead of assessing reality in physical terms.

Continuing with the Procrastination character.

Within having this writing/document to be written,  a physical way of approaching this in the most simple and suitable manner is: I have to do this writing, I simply take my computer, do the necessary readings/ research in it and write the document out. However, what have I accepted and allowed within me to accumulate layer after layer of procrastination to not just do it? Several enticing words, sentences or entire inner-conversations/ backchat in order to look at this physical task in a way that is MORE than myself in the moment – things like

• I require more time to do this, not now
• I rather get to this later on in the day, when there is no noise around me
• I would like to get it done, but first I go out for a walk
• I would want to get that book First before I even intend writing
• It’s going to take me too long today, rather do it tomorrow /DIT syndrome

 

Now these are only a few examples here, within investigating throughout the various dimensions within this character, I’ve seen how there are many points that factor into this particular point of not doing it which is related to confronting the written document with others, having to re-write it several times, wanting to place it ALL within one single document, my backchat about the career itself, etc. So, the points above are only a fraction and more like an immediate example of the points that indicate a direct postponement of the writing itself; however I have seen myself always going into the imagination and future projection aspects that lead to pushing the point even further into the future in order to ‘instead do this’ / do that – which is an aspect I had discussed as well, how I tend to make it as if I am being a ‘better person’ because of taking other tasks to complete or because I am rather taking responsibility for OTHER points instead of the main one that is here to be done.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to talk to myself within my mind in order to place a ‘better thing to do’ instead of actually giving direction to my task at hand, which is how I have disregarded the physical reality and responsibility in order to place a more ‘suitable’ point in front of me in my mind that I then direct myself to do, as an ‘acceptable way’ of postponing/ leaving for later the task that I was about to do, which indicates how I have been listening to/ following the voices in my head in order to Not immediately do things, but instead allow myself to go into self-interest mode, search for something that I would ‘rather do’ and within this, create a seemingly ‘fine’ moment in my day because ‘I am doing something’ and ‘I am taking care of other responsibilities’ but the one that I was in the moment ‘going to do’ but literally talked myself out of it.

When and as I see myself talking myself out of doing a task, I stop and I breathe. I realize that talking myself to not do things is the same as thinking positive in hopes of something ‘great’ happening and me not having to do it at all, which is similar to praying and hoping something else will come along so that I don’t have to do this, which is self-talk in self-interest to only do what ‘I like doing’ and leave aside all that which I don’t really ‘wanna do’ but Have to do anyways – thus

I commit myself to stop the chatter and seemingly enticing ‘other things to do’ that I create as thoughts in my head to not do things, and instead of following my self interest, I direct myself to work on what is required to be done, ensuring that I am directing myself according to what I realize I won’t probably ever WANT o Desire to do to, but simply must be done as part of my responsibility.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fool myself with internal conversations/ backchat in my mind in order to not have to do things,, which is no different to hearing a god/ hearing voices in my head which is considered a delusional aspect of humanity which has definitely become the same point we have all been responsible for when it comes to delegating the things that must be walked/ corrected/ self directed within physical reality and leaving them for some ‘external force/ source/ god’ to do it for us, which is delusional – yet I realize that I am doing exactly the same thing whenever I am expecting me to ‘eventually do it’ without any immediate self-direction at the physical level to In fact do it.

When and as I see myself chatting myself up for doing something else/ waiting for the ‘right moment’ to do this, I stop and I breathe – I realize that I can make a thousand excuses in order to Not do it,  within this

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not want to see how I even go to the extent of creating my own justifications as to why ‘what I decide to do instead of the task at hand is much better to do it now than later’ – in this implying that I make myself remain in ‘good standing’  at all times within my mind wherein the point of procrastination is then left as a ‘future point’ that I simply apparently make the ‘informed decision to leave for later’ which is an evolved character point of thinking that because I am deciding to do something else instead of the task at hand, I remain ‘in control’ of the situation, which is not so at all, since we realize in common sense that the actual Self-directive decision implies simply doing it, instead of finding necessary knowledge and information to formulate an excuse as to why I am not doing it.

 

When and as I see myself thinking that I am still ‘in control of myself’ due to me making the decision to not do it at the moment – I stop and I breathe, I realize that this false sense of stability upon ‘deciding to not do it’ is in fact the result of extensive self-brainwashing/ backchatting myself into thinking why it is pertinent to ‘do it later, not now,’ which exists as further thoughts in my head that I have given attention to in order to see them as ‘plausible’ for me to use as a way to get myself out of the task at hand while remaining in ‘good standing’ within my mind – not realizing that all of this takes place ONLY in my mind and that it is in fact even complicated having to make up all of these nonsensical excuses and justifications to not do it, while all that is required is simply doing it.

 

I commit myself to realize that backchatting/ brainwashing myself to not do things and believing that it is an ‘informed decision I’m making’ is obviously pointing out a great point of deception that must be stopped, as common sense as the physical doing and taking responsibility for the points to do is non-existent within all the series of excuses/justifications to not do things.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use backchat words and sentences that are not even long enough to try and ‘convince me’ of doing something else, but it is rather an already made decision to simply not do it, which indicates how laziness as a deliberate point of not doing it is allowing ourselves to simply follow our ‘greatest excitement’ as that ‘something’ that we’d rather do instead of committing ourselves to get a task/ project done.

Within this I realize that what must be integrated within me is the realization of who and what I am doing this for? And this is where the point of separation emerges: am I doing this for my parents? am I doing this for others to see that I have a career? am I doing this for ‘art’s sake’ ? Am I doing this to finally ‘get myself out the loop’? Am I doing this to get a piece of paper only? And how I have judged all of these points which have become then the actual obstacle to do it, as the starting point is not yet here aligned with and as myself as a decision I made, but something that I am still seeing as a MUST DO without aligning myself to it as a point of responsibility, but sill as some gnawing thing that I have to ‘get myself into’ for a reason in separation of myself.

This clarifies another aspect that I wasn’t clearly seeing yet if it wasn’t for writing this out and placing in front of me how it is that backchat is really foolish and how there is something ‘deeper’ than just single sentences of ‘not wanting to do it,’ but the reasons WHY I am not doing it is what must be faced.

When and as I see myself wanting to ‘do something’ that I see as a burden to do, I stop and I breathe – I investigate How I have separated myself from this single task and how it is that I have not become the starting point of such task/ job/ work/ writing to do but instead deviated it into doing it for someone else/ for some other cause in separation of me, myself directing myself to respond to the actions I have committed myself to complete, which also implies realizing it is within these points that I actually push-through  – and not necessarily ‘like them’ at the beginning – that I can support myself the most with, as it is breaking through my own views, perspectives and preferences toward parts of my reality that I had held a judgment toward, otherwise how else would I be resisting/ avoiding doing something if it wasn’t because I am holding a judgment toward it that becomes a seemingly ‘great obstacle’ within it all.

It is all self-talk that must be directed and disclosed in order for me to ensure I stop making things ‘more’ than what they are in my head through a mind-assessment of physical reality, instead of remaining here as breath and simply directing myself to do this at the physical level it requires so.

to be continued.

 

“I commit myself to not accept and allow myself to use the resistance as an excuse, reason or justification to give into energy and give up on me, as I see, realise and understand that it’s again another form of mind-manipulation to sabotage/compromise my responsibility to me and my living/application in reality.” – Sunette Spies*

I am the only one that can stop my own mind control 

Blogs:

• A History with Life After Death – Part 5

• Character Dimensions – REACTION Dimension (Part 2): DAY 171
• On Backchat:
• Character Dimensions – BACKCHAT Dimension (Part 3): DAY 169
• Character Dimensions – BACKCHAT Dimension (Part 2): DAY 168
• Character Dimensions – BACKCHAT Dimension (Part 1): DAY 167*

Out of the Interdimensional Portal’s Oven!

• Quantum Mind Self-Awareness – STEP 14

• The Consciousness of the Fly – Part 1 : this is a series that will blow your mind to what extent we get mesmerized by our backchat, internal conversations to judge an apparent/ seemingly ‘great civilization’ while we’re not even aware of how other organisms interact with the earth, how we came to be a physical design that exists as the merging of energy and substance and why we have come to destroy our creation instead of having used for further self-support, expansion and LIVING.  A must hear overall.

170. Positive Thinking Irresponsibility

Continuing with Procrastination Character 

Positive Imagination

As I had mentioned in the previous entry, whenever I had the ‘negative imagination’ such as the point of confronting my writings with my professor, I immediately create a rather positive point of imagination that is related then to, instead of dedicating myself to my writing, I would decide to rather ‘do some small things here and there’ and then go outside for a walk, for example.

I have made no excuse to not go outside for a walk as it’s been a very supportive point, however I see how within this same process of planning my day to ensure I do make some time to go out for a walk, I apply and implement the same for all my other tasks. This means that the seemingly ‘innocent’ moment of imagining the walk outside becomes another point of distraction.

 

Now, what I have realized as well is that this positive imagination does not ‘roll out’ much so to speak, meaning I am not fantasizing all the way about ‘walking’ or else, it’s simply a thought that rolls into the imagination of the air/ breeze, the view of the sun going down, clouds covering the sun, and having something to buy in the vegetable and fruit store/ getting milk – all which are also points that in my mind I make as ‘priority’ and something that ‘must be done no matter what’ which is yes, necessary – however the point is how I use these seemingly common sensical aspects to then simply place everything aside to ‘go get it.’ This means that I have ‘evolved’ somehow my own parameters of tricking myself into simply ‘leaving everything for a moment and going outside’ – which is how I then spend more than an hour out, come back to then see it as ‘too late to write.’

 

There are also future-projection points of imagination, wherein I am mostly waiting for the moment when it is all done and I simply can finally leave and be ‘free’ according to my expectations, which is probably the point of imagination that creates the most ‘noise’ as it is only within these thinking processes and imagination that I see it as ‘too far to get there’ and in that moment, instead of making the decision to walk it through in the moment and get it done, I go into the DIT (Do It Tomorrow) state wherein I simply give up any possibility of even approaching the document – thus, here another imagination with a negative charge comes in within this ‘battle’ between the positive and the negative: I go into the imagination of having to read through all these scattered bits of information and trains of thought that I had poured into that paper, aside from criticizing my Spanish for having too many ‘weird sentence constructions’ which I see I can simply stop judging and re-write in a more suitable manner.

Thus this imagination of having to ‘go through the document’ comes as it is: me sitting in front of my laptop and reading through the information, having to go creating the necessary cites and becoming quite specific within it all which in my mind has become part of an ‘undesired nightmare’ which is only me as my mind making of this task the boogey monster just by this image of me scrolling down all the writing and trying to ‘make sense of it all.’

I stop and I breathe as I see how there is even an anxiety linked to this imagination as I write it out here. It’s fascinating how within this simple example I see and realize how the seemingly ‘positive’ does not emerge from ‘nowhere,’ it’s actually stemming from the negative initial imagination of having to write/ having to fix/amend my writing/ having to actually do it and instead, covering it up with my personal version of love-and-light which is walking outside, having a ‘cool time’ and talking myself into it which I’ll disclose later in the backchat dimension. Thus it is plain to see how we cannot claim that the positive is ‘what it’s meant to be,’ as its very origin is actually a defense mechanism/ a distraction that we create in order to not have to face an actual point of responsibility. I also see and realize that I cannot have the single audacity of judging ‘love and light’ as long as I am creating my own ‘love and light’ through my positive imagination rolling in a seemingly ‘innocent/ harmless’ manner, which has actually become an accumulation of a ‘good/ positive experience’ to cover up the actual procrastination/ negative experience that I have accepted and allowed within me.

So, let’s roll with Self Forgiveness these points:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into a positive imagination point of me going outside, seeing the weather as perfect for a walk and in that moment imagine myself strolling around, experiencing the chilly breeze of air, the streets, the moment of walking in order to convince myself that I should rather go out for a walk instead of writing and leaving the writing for ‘later,’ without realizing that this single occurrence that I have made ‘okay’ to be disciplined about in my day to day living – such as doing it on a daily basis no matter what – has become one of the primary factors to kind of ‘make my day’ to in my mind create a positive experience toward it, instead of facing the point of responsibility that I am ‘saving for later’ due to choosing to go and do that which makes me feel ‘good’ and ‘fine’ about myself/ my day.

When and as I see myself being in the moment of the day wherein I see that it is time for me to write/ tap into the writing itself and get the image rolling of me walking in the street, I stop and I breathe. I realize that this is the moment wherein I make the commitment to not just follow the ‘positive image’ and instead commit myself to do what I require to do, which implies that I can instead schedule my day to ensure that I get to do all my tasks, including my walk, and instead of seeking to have ‘long hours for my writing’ only, I make it a point to work on it in a consistent manner, as this is the only way I see I can ensure that I do not continue postponing and ‘saving for later.’

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to in my mind make it ‘okay’ to imagine for a moment me walking outside/ going out for a walk and use that single point of imagination as enough of a reason to go outside and actually do it, leaving aside everything else because ‘it’s my time and my moment for myself,’ – thus within this positive backchatting creating an acceptable reason for me to do that instead of actually focusing on making it a point to write before I go to the walk, and this is a more suitable way to actually direct my day instead of being ‘waiting’ for the apparent ‘right moment’ that is actually subsumed by all other tasks and bits that I instead go into, leaving aside once again this primary task that must be done.

When and as I see myself making the point of walking an okay thing to do in the moment, I stop and I breathe – I realize that I can in fact continue having that moment within my day, however instead of using the time as a ticking clock for the time to go outside, I use that time to go into my writing. I see and realize that I have created this idea of me having to be in a particular ‘moment/ point of experience’ to be able to write about this, this which is bullshit and a blatant excuse disguised with characters to actually not do what I have to do.

 

Thus I commit myself to not leave the writing for ‘the end of the day’ as I realize that such moment is not the most ‘suitable moment’ to do so, as that is when I instead go into any other point that requires direction  or even another distraction wherein I then waste time that I could have used to do whatever I did before going out for a walk.

In this I see that it is more suitable for me to write during the day than waiting at night to do so, as the night comes and then the ‘Do it tomorrow’ mode becomes another way to justify not getting to it today.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hold the imagination as a remembrance of me deciding to write my document and having to go through these endless pages of scattered information that I have equated to a point and experience of anxiety and frustration and irritation, due to me having had no regard to go placing the necessary data to be able to identify the information appropriately.

 

When and as I see myself using the imagination of me scrolling down the entire document and reading through it as a negative experience within me, I stop and I breathe – I realize that I have kept this memory as a point to re-enact whenever I am ‘apparently’ making a decision to just do it, and that I have repeated and integrated at the level of a physical habit in order to Not do things which is unacceptable, as I then pull out the imagination point of ‘walking outside’ as a positive experience and make it ‘okay’ to just leave everything else for later.

I commit myself to stop fooling myself within my own mind with all types of images and excuses and justifications to not move and not do this  – it is even quite a joke to see how I have committed myself to write on a daily basis for a while now and how I have been able to do that without major problem, however when it comes to another writing point that I have separated from my current writing, I judge it as a burden/ as a point of resistance which simply allows me to see where and how I have created separation within my own value system of what type of writing is ‘more important to do’ instead of actually realizing that if I am able to write here, I am able to write in just another word document as well – it is a single physical aspect/ point to walk through, committing myself to remain here as breath to not allow any negative experience such as anxiety or fear itself as a single point that prevents me from simply doing it.

I commit myself to walk through the resistance to write and stop all positive imagination to not do it in that moment, and instead direct myself to open the document, start reading/ looking at points that require to be re-written, re-arranged and give it the same point of dedication that I have committed myself to in my daily writings, as it is then a single point to extend my responsibility to.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create my own ‘temptations’ through my own participation in imagination, wherein I then become a ‘victim’ of my own positive-imagination to lure me into doing something that I ‘enjoy’ instead of doing that which must be done no matter what.

 

When and as I see myself creating my own ‘temptations’ of luring myself into doing something that I would ‘rather do’ and ‘enjoy more’ doing/ participating in, I stop and I breathe. I realize that this is my point of responsibility and I see how it is just like a foolish point to continue giving my power away to this, as I realize that no matter how much I ‘think of doing it,’ it won’t make me more or less responsible about it, this is about being physically moving here wherein I stop all assessments, judgments, time calculations, positive imagination thinking and future projecting about the task at hand – instead, I bring myself back to breath and simply do it.

I commit myself to not use a positive image of me doing anything else BUT going into the actual physical opening of the document and working on it which I realize  is just an action of Doing it.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be controlled by my own imagination as a positive and or negative experience that in both cases, becomes an obstacle for me to not do it, within this

When and as I see myself going into my own imagination as an excuse to not do things, I stop and I breathe. I realize that I have made it ‘okay’ for me to ‘follow my desire to have a positive experience’ during the day instead of realizing that it is not about giving up ‘walking’ altogether, but simply not using it as an excuse or reason in my mind to do this instead of ‘that.’

I commit myself to stop participating in my mind in imagination in order to actually get REAL and physical with what is required to be done.

Desteni

Desteni Forum

Desteni I Process

Equal Money System 

 

Blogs:

Character Dimensions – IMAGINATION Dimension (Part 2): DAY 166

Character Dimensions – REACTION Dimension (Part 1): DAY 170

Day 170: After Death Communication – Part 19

 

Interviews:

Quantum Mind Self Awareness – STEP 1

Quantum Mind Self Awareness – STEP 2

169. Imagination as a Distraction to Not Do things

When it comes to walking the procrastination character in relation to imagination, I could see myself having both positive and negative projections wherein within ‘playing’ with both, I would end up simply being entertained in the mind by either/or with no physical / tangible doing that would mean a single decision to get things done, such as just writing it out.

Thus as much as imagination would be linked to facing a point of fear in relation to the task at hand, the positive imagination would be me convincing myself of what I could instead do to not have to face the point of actually just doing it.

 

A specific thought among others is when I think of me being at the office of my professor and waiting for a verdict on my paper wherein such single image of the office is linked with a negative energy experience that I have created a resistance toward due to thinking and believing that the word ‘revision’ means doing it all over again several times. I explained the thought of ‘the office’ in the previous blog linked to fear of having to confront my ideas with another person – hence the thought would become an actual play out of events in my mind which is more in the realm of imagination of how it would go finally facing the point and how I would direct myself in the situation:

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a resistance to actually doing the written document due to this single thought of me sitting in front of my professor’s chair at his office and waiting for a verdict on the current state of the work, hoping for it to go well without realizing that with me creating this single thought and going into the imagination of him telling me that it is either ‘done’ or ‘requires a lot of re-writing to be done,’ I create an actual resistance to do anything at all – this means that whether my imagination is positive or negative about it, I remain entertained only in my mind about it instead of actually physically doing it.

 

When and as I see myself entertaining myself in my mind with regards to a positive or negative feedback upon my work, I stop and I breathe – I realize that what is being created in my mind is of no substance other than my own thoughts that are built upon a future projection of me having ‘finished the work,’ which is precisely what needs to be directed by me in physical reality.

 

I realize that I will invariably have to face such imagination-point as an actual event of going for revisions and that in no way do I require to create an expectation about it being good or bad – I assist and support myself to remain here as breath when and as I approach the office/ the person and take things as breath, ensuring that I do not try to make things only ‘my way’ but am open to perspectives/ constructive criticism that can in fact assist and support me to expand my current view/ perspective on the point.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to link the word ‘revision’ to a negative experience wherein I believe that I will have to re-do everything again and link this ‘re-doing’ to the ‘worst case scenario’ that I participate in within my mind, without realizing that this fear is actually me preventing me from actually doing anything at all.

 

Thus, when and as I see myself imagining the moment of revision of my work and being anxious and nervous while having him reading the whole thing, expecting for the worst to happen, I stop and I breathe – I realize that I am able and capable of supporting myself to remain here as breath, realize that I can only hear and be willing to co-operate within going through the written document as many times as required in order to have everything done in a suitable manner, without creating any stress or anger for having to repeat the whole thing/ repeat some parts as I see and realize that this is part of doing this work thus

I commit myself to stop any fear and imaginary play outs of the worst case scenario as having to repeat myself several times, which I see is a possibility within the nature of the current task at hand – and that in no way do I require to create a negative experience toward it.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a future projection of be expecting ‘the worst’ within the imagination-rolling of this thought of the office wherein I play out a hypothetical situation of me having to re-do the whole thing over and over and over again, getting frustrated about it and this is so without realizing that with me simply giving Into this thinking and imagination processes, I am in fact giving permission for me to eventually really go through this,  as I am being the creator of myself and my reality, believing that I somehow had to ‘face’ such points in order to see ‘who I am’ within them, which is absolutely Not necessary as I can simply decide to stop all future projections in the negative realm of it all ‘going wrong,’ stop all resistances and fears in one single moment and actually do the doing as an actual doing as point of Self Movement that must take place by my own physical decision to type and write it out.

When and as I see myself rolling the thought of the office into an imaginary moment of having to confront my work with another being, I stop and I breathe – I realize that this is me sabotaging myself with no substance to it other than entertaining myself in the mind instead of actually doing – thus

I commit myself to stop going into imagination about future projecting the confrontation/ presentation of my work with other beings and as such, assist and support myself to be here as breath throughout the entire process, as I see and realize that going into nervousness, anxiety or frustration leads nowhere but having to eventually do it all over again no matter what, as I realize that this has to be done and there is no other way around it.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have the imagination of being in the room of examination with all professors and having them asking the question ‘what does this all have to do with your career’? which is a primary imagination play out due to my own backchat toward my career choice and my belief that I am betraying ‘my vocation’ by now being dedicated more to the study of the human mind and not so much in the creative process of visual arts, without realizing that we use our mind to create and as such there is no possibility to dissociate a physical externalization as an ‘expression’ of ourselves without making use of the mind.

Thus I realize that this self-creation process is of course as relevant as any other aspect/ consideration within any expression, as it is an externalization of who we are/ how we are existing as the mind.

When and as I see myself going into imagination of that moment of having to confront my work and receive criticism for it not being ‘visual arts related,’ I stop and I breathe – I realize that there’s no sense of going into this thoughts and participate within it as it is only based on fear and further backchat that I’ve had toward my own career and current interests in life, which can be certainly equally supported by both activities, as both points are related to who we are as humans and as such, there’s no need to create a dissonance around this in my mind any further.

 

I commit myself to stick to the physical, common-sense reality that is here for me to walk and direct myself in, wherein I do not require to imagine the whole thing ‘being done’ as I can only stick to writing it and working on it as a physical action in the moment, as I see and realize that imagining possible outcomes with it serves no purpose but distraction in relation to the actual work that requires to be done.

— to be continued

 

Desteni

Desteni Forum 

Desteni I Process

Equal Money System

Journey To Life 

 

Blogs:

Character Dimensions – BACKCHAT Dimension (Part 3): DAY 169

Day 169: After Death Communication – Part 18

 

Supportive Interview:

Eye Twitching – The Body as Teacher

146. Fear of Death

Self Forgiveness and Self Corrective Statements/ Commitments

Thought:  I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear death due to the pain that I have accepted and allowed myself to future project I will experience, without realizing this is all based on knowledge and information that I have used in order to generate the fear of dead, instead of realizing that I am here as breath and that whenever death comes, I am here as breath to walk through it till breath is no more

 

Commitment: I commit myself to instead of existing as ‘fear of death’ I live my life ensuring that I can broadly say I have Lived this day as if it was the last day, ensuring that I in fact thus commit myself to LIVE and within this holding no fear toward a future and no regret toward the past, but live in every moment of breath here, so that whatever may come or may not come, it does not influence who I am here as the physical day to day living

 

Imagination: I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hold the image of me burning in flames as the utmost fear in my mind toward death, without realizing that I have created this pictures as ‘fear of death’ due to how I have linked heat/ fire to the most excruciating torture – thus it is all based on knowledge and information that I have linked to ‘pain’ and as such formulating my own ‘fear of death’ linked to heat/fire as the ‘worst way to die,’ binding myself to my own creation at a thought level, which is ludicrous.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use my imagination to think about my end as it is entertaining to ‘ponder’ about that stuff, without realizing that while doing so, I am in fact missing and giving away my breath of life to do so, which is pointless

 

Commitment: I commit myself to when and as I see myself fearing death and thinking of fire, I stop and Breathe, I realize that this is my own creation that I am here to take self responsibility for as it is only a thought emerging as a point of entertainment in my mind, without realizing that in doing so I am in fact missing the breath that is here as the life that I am existing as in every moment – thus I commit myself to live here as breath and Not participate in any thoughts about death, as they are utterly useless.

I commit myself to remain here as breath so that I do not go creating unnecessary thinking and draining in my body to create alternate dimensions of ‘death fears’ – instead I commit myself to live here, focusing on what is HERE

 

Backchat: I  forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hold the backchat ‘I don’t want to die in a gruesome manner’ without realizing that in such fear I am just entertaining my fear, and there’s no point in even giving my breath away of Life to such thoughts about dying and ways of dying – I instead support myself to live as breath, wherein I am here physically aware of the body that is here and stop the unnecessary thinking about ‘ways to die’ lol

 

I commit myself to not entertain my mind with backchat indicating/ navigating through ‘ways to NOT die’ as it is absolutely pointless to entertain myself thinking about anything that is not HERE as myself as the physical reality – thus it is to live here, let go any minor attempt of thought about dying as a way to create fear and as such, ensure that I am breathing, living moment to moment.

 

Reaction: I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear my own fear of death wherein because I have no reference to ‘death’ I try to make it up in my mind and react with ‘courage’ toward it, instead of realizing that nor courage nor future projecting about death is necessary as I am here as breath  and such, death may or may not come the next breath and that doesn’t determine who I am in the moment – thus I simply remain breathing not supporting any fear of death as a thinking possession.

 

I commit myself to stop fearing death or any thoughts related to dying as I see and realize it is mere entertainment for my mind to actually evade looking at what is here -thus when and as I see myself wanting to lurk around ‘fear of death’ and any thoughts related to that, I instead breathe and look at the point that I am facing in the physical reality to instead, work with/ direct myself to face the physical-reality that is here and stop going into the movie-theatre drama entertainment of ‘fear of death’ in my mind.

 

Physical: I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel a petrifying fear whenever get an exhilarating/get a cool experience around thoughts of dying and how it ‘could happen,’ as I see and realize that this draining sensation in my physical body is in fact me creating an energetic experience out of my own thoughts, which is unacceptable when seeing, realizing and understanding that I abuse my physical and actually Kill myself when thinking about death and creating an experience about it- which is what requires to be stopped in any other aspect within my mind in order to actually be here and live

 

I commit myself to live here as breath wherein there is no possibility to create an experience of thinking as I see and realize that getting an energetic high through wondering and flirting about death is simply another way to entertain myself here, while abusing the physical reality and body that I am. Thus I live here as breath, and take responsibility for the thoughts I do direct in my mind in order to Live – I realize that creating even a positive experience out of thinking about death is rather ludicrous and no different to any other escapism modality to not face myself here – thus I take responsibility and face myself here as breath.

I see and realize that most of the ‘ways to die’ I have gotten from movies/ stories that I’ve seen and read and as such, accepted them as also ways to entertain myself in the mind, instead of being here as the physical realizing the absurdity of fearing death while I am breathing here.

 

Consequence: I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not even be aware of what I have done onto my physical when ‘flirting’ about death and ways to die, wherein I am clearly not HERE as breath, but entertained in my mind with either a fear or exhilaration about ‘dying’ or everyone ‘dying’ as I see and realize that’s just part of the consequential outflow of me/ us not wanting to take responsibility for what is here as our creation

I commit myself to instead walk step by step my mind possession of either a positive or negative experience when thinking/ flirting about death/ dying thoughts, as I see and realize that I am here as breath and that such thoughts only indicate me wanting to ‘escape’ the moment in my mind – thus I bring myself back to here so that I realize that every single thought has a consequence to be walked through and as such I commit myself to stop creating consequences that are detrimental to self

 

Walk with us at Desteni to realize how futile it is to ‘Fear Death’ and instead, support ourselves to LIVE here in every moment of Breath.

Desteni I Process

Equal Money System : Supporting Life from Birth to Death –

 

The real death is the depletion we are imposing onto our world and reality when living in a world-system/ economic model that doesn’t support Life in Equality.

 

Blogs:

Thoughts: Pixels of the Screen of the Mind – Part 2: DAY 146

Day 146: Synchronicity and Natural Selection

Vlog:

FEAR WEEK: Fear of Drowning? Suffocating? In flames? FEAR of Death!

2010 Equal Money Ends Fear

115. Following our Dreams is Plain Delusional

When we are children, we are taught to create plans to see where and how we ‘envision’ ourselves in our future, we learn the expression ‘Follow your Dreams’/ Making your Dreams come True!’ and what comes to mind is even that type of vintage pictures wherein such concept was literally ‘pictured’ like, no different to Nazi or socialist propaganda really, but no one cared enough to even look at how images of happy fami-lies became the golden standard – I mean the golden path to follow as an apparent ‘purpose in life.’ All of this was part of an entire cultural brainwashing in order to keep this system in place – Yes, following a personalized dream and fantasy using a delusional system to abuse reality became a ‘normal thing’/norm for all of us to accept as ‘real’ and friendly known as the American Dream, setting the standard of a self-proclaimed Excellence in ‘Living Standard’ worldwide and setting the trend that would essentially lead us all to our current downward spiral, as we see capitalism our image and likeness made an economic model to follow in mind and heart – destroying the very  life that we have literally abused in the name of ‘following our greatest excitement/ dreams/ happiness,’ you name it – the gist of it is one and the same: Focus on what YOU Want, do all you can to get it and screw the rest of the world.  

How is it that such elusive ideas became an actual aim/ goal in our lives, separating ourselves even further from physical reality and as such, buying all the lies that we have crafted in order to ‘materialize’/ manifest such imposed living standards based on consuming all we can as a synonym of power – how deluded: consuming ourselves as a symbol of ‘power’ and ‘success,’ no wonder we are in the verge of self destruction.

Who and what has created this consequential outflow that we are now sunk in? We have – many say we are doomed and lost forevermore – I learned from an interview at eqafe that as long as we are breathing, it  is never too late.

 

What are we exactly saying when uttering the words: I am following my dreams!

What supported me to see this point was listening to an interview wherein I realized how one of the perfect traps is playing the game of wanting to ‘see more’ than ourselves here, wanting to BE more than who we already are, and that’s how we’ve lived endless cycles trying and attempting to be ‘special’ from the very beginning of human civilization  (I suggest to listen to the fascinating details about the technical aspects of what real Avant-garde reality existed here and the inner experience of beings within such context in Reptilians – Existential Devolution – Part 78) – never in our dreams would we have dreamed of having the actual creators explaining how we have created this reality ready to be the platform to develop our eternal ‘pursuit of happiness’ as ‘our dreams’ such as the perfect ideals of power/ a ‘moreness’ of which we never realized the consequence of, missing out the fact that we cannot literally build castles in this world without having slaves working to manifest it, we cannot keep ourselves ‘dreaming’ all the time about obtaining/ gaining/ stealing something MORE without even looking at how because of keeping ourselves in this perpetual slumber trying to be ‘more,’ we have in essence doomed ourselves to be and become our own worst nightmare, because we tried to manifest in this reality our mind-dream states of programmed perfection, power, grandeur, specialness, majesty while going neglecting every single being that must suffer the consequences of our Laws of Attraction, our Secrets, our Divine Light Wisdom Hollywood Treats that are like pungent shots of sugar rotting the very teeth that we use to bite the hand that feeds.

American Gothic mocking the dream

“I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that Dreams will Use All available Memories and Mutate them to Specify the Greatest Fears, which are the Greatest Desires to make sure the Characters Remain ALIGNED to their Intended Evolutionary Path, which will Lead to the fulfillment of the Goals Set by the Characters in their Initial INCEPTION, as Characters through which HUMAN Nature Role play, is Accepted as the Only Way Life Exist on Earth as the Human. Regardless of the Evidential Outplays that Show that this Evolving Human Nature is a Destructive Force that Only Consider Self Interest and have no Conceptualization of What Life Actually IS.” – Bernard Poolman 

 

It’s very clear with Bernard’s blog today how instead of falling for the ‘thrills’ that dreams present, we instead develop and actual ability to see who we are in the dream, what characters are we still ‘falling for/ playing out’ and actually reacting to in our dreams – sometimes they even represent cool points wherein we can see ourselves not giving into the pattern, however the test of time is the real decisive factor here, wherein it is to ensure that we go facing our subconscious and  unconscious dimensions as part of our own process, until who we are in our waking moments and asleep is equal and one –

Within this I realized how the slightest moment wherein I ‘give in’ within my dream to play-out a single fear, a single secret mind desire, a single moment wherein I am waiting for something ‘more’ than myself to just ‘happen,’ I am still living in a mind-frame of reality wherein the physical is disregarded and we still try to get a kick out of any type of experience in our minds, all because of energy.

 

It is no coincidence that the ultimate pursuit of happiness can be explained as ‘following our dreams’ yet we never questioned it for the actual mind-creation to keep the system running that it represents, wtf? The lies we’ve followed as our ultimate goal being even called as the illusion that they are yet we align our entire lives to work, educate ourselves and essentially prepare ‘who we are’ to ‘fool-fill’ such dream, which is always linked to sex and money.

 

Our one and only dream should be Life in Equality for All through establishing the Equal Money System , simply because we have never even considered how our very ‘mundane dreams’ such as the overrated pursuit of happiness and any other delusion of grandeur are preventing us from actually LIVING and have actually lead us to a self-evident devolution, which is something we haven’t ever really done, because we’ve always given-into ‘the pursuit of ‘the dream’ the same way that we give into sleeping whenever we are not diligent enough to breathe and be the directive principle to live the declaration of who and what we really are as one and equal as the body, as the mind, as the physical reality that is already here and simply having to be organized in a way wherein all bodies in existence can be equally supported to finally establish an equal and one living-state wherein no more ‘dreaming’ is necessary, as it will be given unconditionally by mere virtue of having been born in this world.

 

Our fantasies have become our own demise, trying to live out that which has only ever been fabricated in our own minds, the perfect carrot on the stick that was only a holographic illusion.

Developing an equal and one relationship with ourselves as this physical reality is the key to actually make our ‘dreams’ an actual physical reality for all beings as one and equal where the Power of Equality is all that we can in fact be benefitted from.

 

I commit myself to stop any form of mind quest for an energetic experience that takes place when we go into a seemingly innocent ‘daydreaming’ state, which are precisely the building blocks of our entire delusional reality, wherein we have become walking zombies seeking for the next big thrill. Limited, very limited – and we are here to demonstrate to ourselves that it is absolutely possible to step out of our own tunnel vision of ‘great expectations’ and actually consider practical solutions at all times, to stop creating castles in the air of no substantial support for LIFE itself. Thus, time to get ourselves really grounded with our two feet on the ground to work together and see how we can practically make our ‘dreams come true’ as a tangible, physical, constant and consistent living reality for all beings, for once and for all.

Time to Wake up from this perpetual slumber:

Desteni

Desteni Forum

7 Year Journey to Life 

 

Blog:

• *Day 115: DREAM EVOLUTION 2012

• Sub-Character Creation – Part 3 (Self-Forgiveness): DAY 115

• Day 47: The Evil Individual

Understanding why desiring to Live our Fantasies is and has become our own demise: Why is evolution a fantasy that exists only in the Minds of humans and Media in the World-System? Find out here:

• Reptilians – Existential Devolution – Part 78

• Bernard Poolman – Parasitic Ego and The Illusion of Self

• Life Review – The Day Dreaming Zombie

• Life Review – Is Crime a Choice

• The Soul of Money – How Illusion became Reality – Part 27

   

* See The Trap by Adam Curtis for context, as well as The Century of the Self