Tag Archives: intellect

March 18, 2017

539. Taking Life Seriously

By Marlen

 

§  Continuing from: 530. The Secret Behind Attraction

 

A particular trait that I had also defined as ‘superior’ was the expression of seriousness within people linked to a particular intellectual character wherein both points – the characterization or ‘portrayal’ at a physical manner level plus all the ‘right words’ would usually lead me to feel intimidated or perceiving that I was ‘less than’ people that would present themselves as very articulate, stoic in their expression and most of all serious in their expression or communication, perceiving that this seriousness was something that I lacked – apparently – and that I would therefore only get to admire in others for the rest of my life.

Over the years of walking the Desteni Process, I’ve been able to slowly but surely debunk my own perceptions around this seriousness wherein I myself have embodied such seriousness as a way to cause a certain impact upon people in an attempt to say: look, I mean this for real, I care for this – which would at the same time then be more of a ‘show’ for others in my expression than me living seriousness in a supportive manner, and this I explain in a certain perspective in a vlog I made today here.

Here I want to check where I am in relation to this ‘seriousness’ and aligning it to what I want to live as an expression of ‘taking life seriously’ which doesn’t mean I have to keep a straight face all the time or act in a rigid and in a controlled manner, appear stoic and ‘motion-less’ or be overtly intellectual to be perceived by others as ‘me being a serious person.’ It is interesting how the definition of seriousness is mostly linked to this rigid expression which of course myself as a female, it became easy to associate this ‘seriousness’ mostly with males, which I have linked to a form of ‘physicality’ (which I’ll open up in a blog to come, a stability, confidence, grounding experience which I had separated myself from based on comparing my expression to that of males mostly, considering my bubbly and ‘flowy’ expression at times as a form of  weakness instead of simply embracing it as a part of my expression, no more or less than any other – so here again exposing the problem of going into comparison leading to an inevitable polarity of ‘more or less than’ which recreates consciousness-speak.  

So, here what I separated myself from is again a mind-experience related to ‘seriousness,’ a set of characteristics that are portrayed as a personality, a façade, a way of behaving or presenting oneself towards others, instead of actually living the word seriousness.

What does ‘taking life seriously’ mean to me? Essentially comprehending the role that each one of us have as creators of this reality and acting accordingly, which implies taking responsibility for our lives in our mind, being and body, learning to and applying ourselves to correct every aspect of our lives that we are the creators of and understand then the relevance each one of us has in this process of birthing life from the physical, in other words: taking seriously our role as ‘gods’ of our creation.

Here I want to specify how I’ve observed this within myself and other people that I’ve come to be in close contact with throughout my life wherein I would be intimidated or ‘in awe’ of certain people presenting themselves in this ‘serious’ character, yet when it comes to actually ‘walking the talk’ as in living the seriousness and intellect they might have had into a supportive manner, there was still quite a threshold and I could observe this within myself as well where I became more of a ‘show for others’ than fully grasping the actual capacity I had to live what I was preaching to the T and so genuinely take life seriously.

This assists me to debunk my own perceptions about what I’ve defined in me as a lack of ‘seriousness’ and instead now realize that I can assess for myself according to how I’ve lived, the decisions I’ve made and what I’ve committed myself to in order to define whether I am taking life seriously or not. I can self-honestly say yes based on the self-commitment I have, not to the utmost potential of ‘taking life seriously’ yet though, but I have a direction and set of ways to continue doing my part in whichever way I can to contribute to this living process from consciousness to self awareness as life.

I can therefore say that I have yet to fully embody taking my life seriously, but I understand and have walked in a consistent manner this practical learning process called life in self-awareness  of us being the creators of our lives, all of us being responsible for every action and consequence that has shaped our lives and that of others – understanding the scope of this existential process and at the same time understanding our role in it all.

Taking life seriously means participating in this process, being a life-birther so to speak not only in thoughts or eloquent speeches, but in who we are in our day to day actions, decisions, choices, ways of living, behaving, the kind of relationships we form with people, the kind of life we lead towards others and in our very own ‘secret mind’ – all of this is what reveals how serious we are with our own life and so life itself.

And because I cannot really ever measure or judge anyone as being serious or not about life, I can only live and do that for myself in my own life, and that’s what I commit to do, so that whenever I see I am being lax about the effect of my thoughts, words and actions in the constant and continuous process of co-creation in this reality, I have to ground myself back into taking life seriously and reminding myself that nothing that I participate for is ‘unaccounted for’ or ‘forgotten’ or ‘erased’ from the physical memory in this reality.

We have been existing into a seemingly ‘comfortable’ tunnel vision to understand the actual immediate co-creative abilities we have onto our reality with our very thoughts, words and deeds and their consequences of course as the proof of that, no matter how we may justify them or ‘paint’ them, we are all equal co-creators in this – yet, each one of us has the ability to decide what kind of creation process one gives life to, and the level of self-awareness that we have the potential to exist as vs. the level of awareness we ‘choose’ to blind ourselves with from our individual and collective responsibility to the whole.

So, here I commit to remind myself to not be impressed or intimidated by a personality that looks and sounds serious, eloquent, precise, meticulous, common sensical yet intellectual in nature, because this is where I need to always remind myself that as simple as it might sound: talk is cheap, words are ‘easy to say,’ they are ultimately just words, speeches – but Living Words is a whole different story. What we need is people actually living what we preach and this applies not only as an external ‘role’ or ‘profession’ for the world out there, but actually being so in one’s day to day.

Therefore, the point here is for me to be an example of what it means to take life seriously in my every thought, word and deed, wherein I commit to do what I set myself to be and do in the name of what’s best for all, where my life can stand as a testimony of what it means to ‘be the change you want to see in this world’ and do so without having to resort to the usual traits and personalities that may use ‘seriousness’ as a way to portray a form of superiority or ‘authority’ which many times – if not most – are not congruent in terms of ‘personal’ and ‘professional’ life.

That’s the divide I want to break here in my own life where I am not just someone that divides life and work in order to be ‘two separate beings’ that can take life seriously and not at the same time – no matter ‘what’ I do and where I am in the system, I commit myself to taking life seriously as in not being lax to my own application of self-correction and living expansion, and to honor that commitment through every decision I make in my life, which translates into living integrity and self-respect as creators of our lives= as within, so without.

That’s the kind of individuals that I’d like us all to become and debunk for once and for all the external facades of ‘care towards life’ that are not genuinely honored in the nature of who we are as individuals, becoming ‘cheap talk’ with no substance at all – and this is what I am here challenging within myself, to stick to my truth, to live my words, to practice what I preach in my living reality on a day to day basis, beyond only conveying good sounding words which anyone can ultimately convey – this is about sharing one’s truth and one’s commitment to actually live and embody as the new nature of ourselves as human beings, and that’s the kind of seriousness I’m definitely all in for in my existence.

Thanks for reading  

 

 

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February 21, 2017

514. Debunking My Intellectual Arrogance

By Marlen

Or learning to apply the principle of ‘Investigate all things and keep what’s best’ and create a constructive outcome of a personal investigation

Today I woke up and listened to some more information that I’ve been following through for some months that essentially debunk and expose a lot of the ‘alternative culture’ I believed myself to choose to live by while growing up and more so as a teenager and young adult, which was at the time finding a way ‘out’ of the ‘common-culture’ or what I perceived as ‘the normal’ preferences in my environment and mostly in order to form a particular personality ‘out of the normalcy’, but also in an attempt to find something more meaningful in life than what I was immediately ‘offered’ to.  

Now, based on all these investigations I’ve watched, everything that I once learned to appreciate and identify with has been debunked as covert operations to precisely create the types of people and therefore societies in which we are actually living today, with certain notions of ‘radical’ values, ‘out of the norm’ ways of being, preferences that divert our attention from that which I now see and consider of importance and substance in my life.

What I have noticed though is that upon finding out the truth about all those ‘idols’ and people I got to admire at some point in my life and slowly but surely realizing that yes, they were mostly part of some CIA operation that aimed at creating ‘rascals’ or ‘punks’ or ‘hippies’ or ‘socially unfit’ people etc. .and in a way to continue ‘dividing and conquering’ or ‘confusing’ the masses and the youth specially so as to keep everyone well entertained with what I for me and my life consider not relevant things in life.

And here I also noticed that even if I have a clarity on how there is really no ‘mind control’ unless one accepts and allows it through participating it – meaning there’s a two way responsibility here – I still noticed that my overall ‘silent’ reaction was that of disappointment, disenchantment which leads into the usual experiential outflow ‘from love to hate,’ that in my case it turns into this absolutist stance where I am very quick to dismiss it all as ‘a lie’ or ‘bollocks’ or ‘mind control/ brainwashing’ and in one go wanting to completely ‘cut out’ all of myself that I once invested into all of that alternative or ‘counter culture’ that I once was a firm proponent of and supporter.

How did I come to realize this and write about it? Today after I shared the one post on Facebook to prompt people to ‘get informed!’ I went to the Desteni Forum and read a response that Sunette placed for someone else in a similar context to my situation here and that allowed me to be aware of this ‘lashing out’ that I was doing with certain intellectual righteousness and how I have in fact done this ‘from love to hate’ type of relationship with not only musicians, writers or artists in general, but also with philosophies, religious documents and other practices that I did test out for some time in my past and that I completely ‘threw out of the window’ the moment I started this process and in a way creating my own ‘radicalization’ that doesn’t apply the principle of ‘investigate all things and keep what’s best’, but go into the – once again – absolutist stance where I render all of it obsolete in my life, of no use, a waste of time and whenever asked about it, I can quickly dismiss it all as if there was zero value in it at all, which is not so, regardless of its underlying purpose.

So here I want to redeem myself in relation to this and what I so easily jump into a ‘black or white’ type of approach when in reality, it reminds me of having to remember my process. Here specifically considering the life that I’ve lived and how while I was growing up, I took what I found interesting at the time and what I thought would assist me to know ‘alternative perspectives’ and other types of ‘thinking’ than the one around me. At the time I had no reference of living principles or self-honesty or ways to question the kind of values I was getting into – maybe I did know what I was getting myself unto but didn’t question it further because ‘if others were doing it then why shouldn’t I too?’ type of thinking.

At the time I didn’t have any further information that could show me exactly what the ‘agenda’ behind any of the entertainment or arts I got into were really about and if I am honest with myself, a lot of that at the time and in its context allow me to get to know different people and get to nurture different perspectives, maybe not the most ‘supportive ones’ but were a sort of bridge or way for me to then get to be where I am now which was, breaking through certain parameters, norms, learning to question more and explore some other ‘lifestyles’ even if it was mostly through adopting certain preferences in literature, music or arts.

So here’s the quote that prompted me to look into this:

I suggest rather look at your past teachings, information, material, processes – whether good or bad, in a way of “what did I actually LEARN from it? What did I realise as I reflected on the consequences, the good, bad and ugly? How did it all actually assist and support me to realise and understand more about myself? What impact did it have on my life / awareness?” Then, in asking yourself these questions – you can SHARE, in a constructive way what you realized about yourself through it all. This SUPPORTS YOU and MANY others SO MUCH MORE than ‘lashing out / blaming / reacting’ towards anything / anyone in your past, as well as speaks volumes for who you are as a person.

In addition to this all – do realise your responsibility within making the choice / decision to invest in and participate in the past interactions / materials / processes; they did not enforce / demand / control you to. According to what you made of it, was by your will, initiative, self, decisions, reactions, responses, behaviours etc. 


So, again, and this goes for all who has the tendency to do this – POLARISE and REACT TOWARDS others, groups, teachings, materials – rather live “investigate all things, keep what’s good”, where you strive to be HUMBLE and rather UNDERSTAND it / them, take from it that APPLIES TO YOU, that you can use to be the BEST of you in thought, word, deed, self and life creation. 

Now also in your journey with Desteni / within Desteni = ensure you take the responsibility of deciding who you are, how to utilize it, support and assist yourself as you are in your own hands within the confines of your own mind, being and body and so solely responsibility for the decisions you make and the experiences you create; so as to not to one day for some reason shift in your decisions and go into blame and reactions towards something / someone for who you are and what you experience, rather LEARN and GROW and EXPAND. 


We tend to only BLAME and REACT when we in fact did not honestly reflect, learn, see and change at all… – Sunette Spies and the whole context of the topic please, you can read it here: http://forum.desteni.org/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=7978

 

This is very supportive for me to consider at the moment and my approach to ‘getting informed’ and how I’ve been using it as a way to covertly lash out towards all of that which I once invested my time and life on.

Here thus taking my own responsibility, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use the awareness of what some people have found are the real motives and purposes behind counter culture or alternative culture that I once firmly believed myself to be a part of and that I supported, recommended and promoted through my ways of thinking, speaking, my habits and relationships wherein now that I got to know a different perspective on it – or let’s say one of its main purposes – I reacted to it by deciding to expose it, attempting to generate controversy toward it in an attempt to ‘prevent’ others from being following the same or follow into ‘the same trap’ that I believe myself to have fallen into in the past, instead of realizing that I am definitely not going to be able to save anyone by merely ‘exposing’ stuff and vilifying it with the mightiest words I might have at hand, because I realize that only generates or regenerates the polarization as friction and conflict that lacks actual substantial personal input that could in turn be more humble and considerate to share from myself.

Here I therefore consider that I can instead share what I learned from it, what I discovered about myself with it and so at the same time showing the process I have walked to now understand the effects of my participation and integration of certain ways of thinking and living and how I have come to realize for myself, in my life and context are not best for myself, my life, my principles.

This means that I have to develop humbleness in reminding myself that the actual fact is that I had ‘positive expectations’ and thought of myself to be ‘better off’ or ‘superior’ in relation to my participation in this alternative/counter-culture I once sought to be a part of. Therefore when getting to find out that I ‘got myself duped in it’, all the ‘good’ turns to ‘bad’ and that’s how the lashing out and talking ‘against’ all of it becomes a knee-jerk reaction, instead of realizing that this is who I am as the mind that jumps from one pole to the other, instead of taking a moment to breathe, see how I there’s this ‘impulse’ that is moving me which I must take as an indication that I need to take a breath to look at the situation outside of my initial reaction and expand my perspective beyond the ones that I am now seeing being presented as ‘the reality’ or ‘the only truth’ behind it.

I can realize that I have to jump out of the lashing-out bandwagon and slow myself down to instead take a moment to reflect on that which is being ‘exposed’ about something and learn to process this for myself and so share what I’ve also learned from about myself within it or from it, sharing where I noticed that I compromised myself and my common sense to be ‘part of it’ and  so in turn creating a more constructive review of it all in a way that people can learn to also discern for themselves and reflect back on my own sharing.

Ultimately, I can only ever share my own example, my own discernment and self-investigation, but I definitely have to step out of the notion that through me reproving and exposing something will lead others to immediately change their ways and embrace my views and perspectives, this is more like wanting to ‘convert’ others which is not who I want to be in my life, that would not be me assisting others in their own self-realization either, but me trying to convert others to ‘my views’ now and that won’t ever work.

I can only ever share my views, perspectives in a constructive manner while ensuring that I am not holding any emotions to it or personal investment of ‘ego’ in it all, because the very process of sharing anything in my case is to precisely debunk my own personalities, my own ego, my own bias ultimately and I appreciate the fact that I can read stuff like the quote I posted above and be able to own my creation, to take it as a useful point of feedback that even if it wasn’t intended ‘for me’ per se, assisted me a lot to see my relationship with all of those people related to the counter-culture, philosophies or ‘alternative’ movements that I once embraced as ‘who I am’.

Here also a reminder for myself how even if those movements could have been psy-ops and covert operations to dissociate culture, we have made them effective through our own participation and not questioning to the T what kind of principles and values we are imprinting in ourselves within it all, what kind of direction in life are we aiming at with it?

And this is not about ‘those’ people that directed these movements ‘to blame’ – it’s entirely about our own responsibility, our own participation – myself that decided to get into it all and embrace it without a question– even if for only a phase in my life.

Bottom line is, I could not have done ‘all the perfect choices’ in my life and specially while being a teenager and finding my way through the world – not a justification either – but there’s a lot more that we could instead create as ways for the young ones to not fall prey of certain ‘cultural movements’ that lead oneself ‘nowhere’ in life, but to learn to discern and make choices in self-responsibility.

Therefore, this is not a ‘problem solved’ for me, this intellectual arrogance is something that I definitely have to keep working on because even if I can have a deep understanding of reality, ourselves as human beings, our mind, etc. – it’s all still an understanding, a base or foundation of information that can assist in living our lives in a more supportive manner, yet I still have to live It and continue to test it, apply it, be it and ensure that there is no egotism or superiority formed around ‘what I am aware of’ currently either, because that’s not the point at all about this process from consciousness to self-awareness as life either.

So, I keep working on myself and will continue sharing whenever this point emerges back on, as well as some time sharing more of myself in this counter culture too.

Thanks for reading  

 Master of the Worlds

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September 1, 2012

140. Renewing Vows to Live

By Marlen

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see how I was shaping and molding myself to become a person that would use words, knowledge and information to regurgitate it and the be able to be glorified by it in my mind, seeing everything and all ‘above my shoulder’ wherein the very body that allowed me to carry myself as a fatuous person was in fact the very life that I abused while existing ‘on the road’ to be and become the personality that I thought would make me ‘successful’ in life, which was a rather conceited and self-centered person that would only ‘care’ about the world if such point was directly influencing ME only.

When and as I see myself looking only after satisfying me and only me at all times, I stop and I breathe – I realize that living in a world wherein individuality and the exacerbation of the ego as who we are, we have taken our body for granted and only focused on that which makes us ‘feel better/ good’ about ourselves without understanding What it is that we were in fact using/ abusing to  create this positive experience within us. Thus –

I commit myself to bring myself back here as breath in every moment that I see myself speaking or even wanting to speak something that will only add the ingredient of self-importance to what I have to say. I vow myself to ground myself here as life as what’s best for all in common sense, as there can be no need to make oneself ‘more than’ when existing here as life, as breath in the consideration of all as who we are.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become an ‘empty headed’ person the moment that I would only care about ‘those that care about me,’ wherein all my familial, friendship and classmate relationships were always based on self interest, wherein the world could go ‘haywire’ but as long as I had ‘my world in place,’ I would not move a single finger to do something to support myself to become a better living being, simply because I wasn’t even existing as self-respect and self-consideration of the responsibility we hold toward all life here in our reality.

When and as I see myself ever going back to the point of only caring about ‘those in My world and My reality,’ I stop and I breathe – I realize that there is an entire world that is here as myself, that is certainly also awaiting for us to stand up as living beings that no longer hold a family, culture, religion, language or any other legal association as ‘special,’ as I see that we have created a world-system based on hierarchy and specialness that we have imprinted in everything and everyone around us, constantly living in separation from the very objects, air, sun, oxygen, flesh, bones, skin, eyes and mouth to not see and speak and live as the physical flesh, but instead, gave ourselves away to be an empty head that searches for the light, the love, the bliss, the moments of ‘happiness’ and ‘joy’ that I deliberately sought to cherish for my own personal archive of experiences, never even giving a damn about any other being that wasn’t in My Reality in such moments of ‘bliss.’

When and as I see myself only caring about those in My reality – I stop and I breathe – I realize that even those that are only in cyberspace, there is an entire world ready to stand up as life, and that any point of separation that I want to ‘hold on to’ as special in my world, is essentially saying not willing to “give up” a single energetic relationship thread created toward something or someone that in fact exists as a point of separation, instead of walking an actual integration of myself as one and equal as everything/ everyone –

I commit myself to ensure that I regard all living beings, all particles, all and everything that I can see and cannot see at the moment as equal and one parts/ components of the integral self that we are here to honor as Life, as who and what we really are for the first time in our existential lifetime.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to not realize how I was on my way to become an intellectual piece of grey matter that would only care about self-importance and really discriminate everything and all that had to do with Life itself, as I wasn’t regarding my very own physical body as that which is real, that which is who and what I am wherein I instead would ‘give head to’ glorious knowledge and information that would give me a ‘kick’ to learn and regurgitate as part of the words used as weapons of choice to always end up having ‘the last laugh/ the last word’ in a self-righteous mode

When and as I see myself wanting to still re-enact the ‘me’ that is always having ‘the last say/ the last laugh,’ I stop and I breathe – I realize this is not me as breath expressing, but me as the past as the ego wanting to have a ‘sip’ of drunken self-righteous energetic kick out of ‘exposing my wits’ in order to satisfy and stimulate brains as knowledge and information instead of actually speaking/ communicating/ sharing words that bring ourselves back here to Life/ living as the realization that humbleness is the way to stop any fatuous self-indulgent mind-activity that in no way supports life in equality.  Therefore,

I commit myself to live the reality of me here as breathe wherein no thinking is required to exist as the physical body, within the realization that who I am as the configuration of the mind may come and go and that the reality that is me here as the physical, is what is real, is what remains and what will continue until its cycle end.

Thus, I realize that one more year in my life is for the first time an actual gratefulness for having the ability to LIVE and exist here, as I have committed myself to walk this process on Earth till is done – and here I renew my vows to life, to myself as life, and to all that is here that is ready to walk as life on Earth.

I commit myself to live the living-satisfaction way wherein I can only get to be satisfied about my actions, words and deeds as long as they all stand in absolute and unequivocal self-equality and oneness as I see and realize that it is through words that we learn to co-operate as the function that we decide to live in/as such words – thus it is through language that we continue educating ourselves, and through the physical actions the way that we ensure we become the examples that are here and will be here for everyone to finally wake up, open our eyes and realize that self-realization is always one single breath away.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to not even notice the level of judgmental perspectives I would always be externalizing about the world, myself and everyone in it, wherein I never questioned if my words would have any effect on others/ the world and only seeing My Words as ‘My Right’ to speak, as if speaking in itself could do miracles, when it isn’t.

When and as I see myself stepping into the judgmental train of thought – I stop and I breathe. I realize that the world that we live in requires words that heal, words that support ourselves to realize the life that we are and carry around only as an ‘accessory’ for now – it is time to allow the physical to step to the front and utilize the mind to support the physical realization of who  we are as individuals seeking to satisfy themselves for a moment, to then be left with nothing else to ‘show off,’ – thus

I commit myself to expose and live the realization about thoughts, intellect, knowledge and information as a ‘self-righteous and ‘superiority’ complex wherein it is almost a certainty how all of us that were aiming at becoming ‘knowledgeable’ people were only accumulating knowledge and information as a weapon of choice to be ‘more rewarded’ in a system that we have All  accepted and allowed remunerates knowledge and information better than any other job including comments. Thus, I see and realize that to walk the most ingrained patterns within me,  I must walk my process in absolute clarity and specificity, as there are no mid ways to go through it, this time.

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