Tag Archives: leadership

557. Self-Leadership and the Message of Jesus

 

Being that today is a ‘Holy day’ it is a good opportunity to share some of the less seen perspectives that I’ve learned from Jesus’ leadership and message for humanity, one that we have squandered – for the most part – and turned into an image to idolize, instead of living the actual message of life in equality and developing ourselves to our utmost potential.

I was translating today the following audio The Birth of a Leader Begins with Self – The Crucifixion of Jesus – Part 105 which is in fact part of a series that speaks a lot about self-leadership and it was very supportive for me because it confirmed what I am seeing as a potential within myself to become and be part of the people that can assist many others to birth themselves as life, to walk this process, to tap into their utmost potential and essentially use my experience within this process – as well as what’s yet to come – in order to expand this potential to many more people that decides to start walking this process in their lives.

I also was translating another particularly interesting recording wherein Anu compares his leadership to that of Jesus and so he recognizes how Jesus’ intent and living purpose was effective in the sense of him ‘giving up’ his personal life (desires, wants and needs) in a way in order to place the message as his own life as an example for the few that surrounded him and became his disciples – who later on replicated the message and made it reach many more, albeit somewhat corrupted through the institutions this message came to be distributed through. But there are key principles that remain there such as the ones that are openly shared as part of the Desteni Message and that I have come to embrace and remind myself of and practice as I go: love thy neighbor as thyself, give as you would like to receive and do onto others as you would like to be done onto. Those are practical ways to live the message of equality.

However I’ll here focus on the very significant part that Jesus mentioned in this interview I cited above where there’s an actual openness for each one of us to consider living the message that was in essence truncated when he had his time on Earth, which was not to ‘follow’ him as a person, not to idolize him, but to realize we all could be and stand equal to him as self-leaders, as equal-leaders, where each one of us can develop and live to our utmost potential, which invariably then becomes a force of life in each one of us that can slowly but surely throughout generations result in the ‘change of the world’ many of us strive for, but it all starts with one being willing to live as such example, to share how we are walking this self-process and to assist in whichever way we can those that are also walking this process in their locations and realities around the world.

To me the internet is the way to now be and create our own hubs of ‘spreading the message’ of life in equality, of self-responsibility, of self-honesty where things like blogs, vlogs, group discussions can be shared around, reaching out to people that we would not have dreamed of possibly getting to prior to the invention of the internet. So, we have the infrastructure, the networking where all that is needed is us continuing to stand in such self-directed/self-leadership positions where we understand that ‘showing and sharing the way’ creates a potential for many more to wake up and see the potential that there is in this world, despite our continuous newsfeeds letting us know of new attacks in the Middle East, despite a few presidents going awry of their initial promises to stop war, despite the vast consequences that we’re facing in this world, I bet that what Jesus would come and share through his Facebook or twitter feed, would be to not lose sight of our potential, to not let ourselves be debased by only seeing the doom and gloom, the consequences of yes, what we’ve collectively created.

I bet he would suggest to focus on develop our self-leadership, on becoming assertive, directive, self-responsible, on being the example in our reality, being the best that we can be in our relationships with others, be living self-forgiveness in thought, word and deed and within doing so heal and restore the burnt bridges we’ve set alight in our endless quarrels against each other.

A message of unit might seem too challenging for now, therefore what I see is most viable is to start with a self-unity, because in doing so, learning how to in fact be embracing the totality of ourselves, we surely become a force of life that can be shared, taught, assisted to be lived by many more as well, and that’s what I take as my purpose in life, one that I didn’t have before I got to know the Desteni message which is nothing else but the Jesus Message as well. It is not an ‘easy’ one when we are hardwired to defend our egos at all cost, but it is the most honorable path to walk for sure.

So let’s continue to share ourselves, continuing to read and learn from each other because that’s what nurtures our lives and that’s what makes everything so much more substantial in the midst of seemingly ‘endless chaos’ at a global system level, that’s where we genuinely can do our part – wherever we are, no matter ‘what we do’ – where we stand united by principle and embodying this self-leadership as self-direction, enjoying ourselves within discovering and tapping into our living potentials and continuing ‘pass it on’ with the passion that Jesus did during his time on Earth.  

Thanks for reading

For those that are ready, here’s the series The Crucifixion of Jesus at Eqafe.com

And the particular trilogy I mentioned at the beginning of this blog to understand what Jesus’ role in this life process is really all about.

1.      What is Leadership to You? – The Crucifixion of Jesus – Part 103

2.      What is Blocking the Leader Within You? – The Crucifixion of Jesus – Part 104

3.      The Birth of a Leader Begins with Self – The Crucifixion of Jesus – Part 105

 

 

 

Join us in our process of Self-Expression as LIFE

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474. The Intensity of Wanting To Change Others

 

Or how to slow myself down when attempting to make others see what I see for their own process of self-change

Continuing from 472. Humbleness in Process

 

I’ve noticed another situation wherein I have to consider and apply humbleness in process. This is about an experience that comes with a surge of energy, an impetus stemming from a desire to open someone’s eyes about a situation that I can see is compromising, is diminishing, is limiting to oneself-  in a nutshell, is of self-dishonesty and I may see the reasons, the beliefs involved, the energetic addictions that go along with it that another may be participating in and justifying it in various ways that even if they might sound ‘reasonable’, they always still contain a sort of self-sabotage that pops out very clearly when it comes to getting to the bottom of a situation in self-honesty.

I have seen how I tend to create a certain impetus in myself, a sort of ‘push’ that almost wants to throw a bucket of cold water upon another and say ‘Wake up! Can’t you see what you are doing to yourself!’ and this has happened multiple times in multiple ways to multiple kinds of people in my life, from the ones that I get to glimpse while walking on the street or in a public place, to the people that I live and interact with on a daily basis. So, here I have to focus entirely on myself, my own ‘impetus’ and desire for another to ‘see themselves’ the way I see things, because this is coming in fact from an imposition of a limitation wherein it’s like someone giving you the answers to what is ‘going on with you’ which prevents you from understanding yourself and doing the self-work required to get to those realizations for yourself. In essence I would be dishonoring someone’s integrity and individuality If I stand as that ‘someone’ that can ‘show the way’ and even that is also a bit too conceited of me because I’ve realized I absolutely don’t have an ‘answer’ to everything either, nor have I had the life experiences that others have had, therefore, we can only ever reference each other but each one of us ultimately has to find their own way so to speak.

So, what is this ‘impetus’ showing me about myself? First of all, that no matter how much of my time I also dedicate to assisting and supporting others, I have to make sure I don’t patronize or push others to ‘see’ things the same way I am seeing them, because then that would in fact imply that I am wanting to ‘change them’ and push them into a point of realization that I also cannot enforce upon anyone in reality, but stick to moderating myself whenever this impetus and impulse comes from within and towards others in relation to ‘waking someone up!’ or wanting them to ‘snap out of something’ that in fact dwindles their ability to develop a seeing, develop a self-understanding through self-investigation.

Here then, first of all, I have to remind myself that no matter how much I can see through the situation another is in, the choice is theirs and only theirs to walk through with the tools and support they can give to themselves and decide to see beyond the veil by their own will and decision to do so. I have to remind myself I would become ‘their cane’ to walk through a realization and could become something/someone they depend on to keep walking through a point that is and will always be entirely up to themselves to take responsibility for.

I can only ever be a point of reference for the steps of self-support that another is deciding to implement in their own lives, I can only ever share my own personal path and experience but I cannot have this intensity in my words attempting to tell them ‘wake up!’ with an energy that indicates a desperation in me – or seeing a potential as well – but in either way this reaction/energetic experience shows me I am not being patient enough in realizing each one’s path and process of self-awareness, which is a unique process where it will depend on each person to decide how they walk their lives/process and that I have to be ok with being patient in walking with another in their own time/space and pace based on their own self-given steps towards their self-creation and self-awareness.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create an energy surge within myself that comes up whenever I am talking to someone, seeing someone that is doing something that could be bettered, corrected, realized because even if I may see a way through in that problem, hurdle or obstacle, in an attempt to ‘wake them up’ I can feel that I become simply much more intense in my voice tonality as in speaking louder, faster and widening my eyes, tightening my body – or if being typing I start typing super-fast and I even become warmer and more intense in the way that I want to communicate towards another, without realizing that such intensity comes from a need in me to ‘wake another up’, to essentially ‘change who they are’ in that moment so that they can then ‘see the same I see’ or ‘understand the way through,’ which is in fact coming from a desperation within me that is not considering the other person in who they are as individuals, with their own process, their own mind, their particular unique set of patterns, life experiences, memories… the list is endless when it comes to seeing a single individual human being in their mind and the place they are at in their life.

Therefore whenever I come at someone with this intensity and this push through my voice, through my words, through the intensity of the words that I use, I have to realize for myself that all of it is coming from a reaction within me that is at the same time not only feeling like ‘their lives are upon me’ – but also it is a part of me that is not seeing another for who they are or where they are in their lives and personal process, which means, I am in fact not being humble and considerate towards another, but I then believe that others can ‘get it’ the same way I do and in doing so, believing that the other person can see what I see, has lived what I’ve lived, has realized what I’ve realized in an exact way as myself, which is impossible to do, because we are two different beings and I cannot compare myself to another.

Whenever I see myself getting into this ‘intensity’ in communication, in sharing something, I have to make sure that I can fine tune the ways in which I can share myself, be there for another as a point of support without that energy-rush in me and an energy push towards them in an attempt to ‘shake up’ another person, because there I am invading their self-responsibility, their self-direction and their self-awareness development process at the same time, so

I commit myself to learn and practice being more patient in moments when I see a person is in a crux of a process of self-change, and where I can see potentials and ways in which they could walk a particular process towards a correction, an integration of certain words and principles –I have to let go of wanting to ‘push’ a particular way of seeing things, a particular understanding and have to make sure that I am not imposing myself, not imposing what I see unto another but ensure I am only there as an equal that can share a living example and personal experiences with them – as a point of support, a crutch for another’s personal walk for a moment, however ultimately realizing that I cannot become their own feet, their own mind and their own will to move or do something in particular. This would be me imposing myself onto another and therefore, I have to allow myself to breathe and give space and time for another to decide how far, how fast or how slow, how deep or how shallow they decide to explore or face a particular point in their lives, because such ways to live and face our lives depend entirely on ourselves and no one else can really do it for us, such as I have seen and tested for myself.

Therefore, I commit myself to focus on precisely changing this aspect of myself that wants to ‘change another’ or ‘show the way’ to someone else through a surge of words that are coming from a state of reacting in impatience or a ‘desire to wake another up’ which at the same time exists as a fear of ‘the other one not seeing through in this point they’re facing’ and somehow blaming it on me at the same time because of perceiving that if they don’t see it through, then it would mean I am ‘not being there for them to walk it through’ – but here

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think, believe or perceive – no matter how slightly – that another’s life and process depends very much on me and my input and support, which in fact is not so, I can only ever share my own experiences, my own ways of self-support, assist in considering self-honesty in certain situations in my life that I can then share as first hand experience, but I cannot ever make decisions for another, I cannot ever push another to do or think or act in a particular manner and I have to allow independence in another to also figure it out for themselves.

It’s interesting because this is something that I have very much a tendency to do, sometimes act like a mother – in the current most-prevalent design of a mother nowadays – towards people that can scold and get flustered about seeing situations and potential consequences and kind of ‘knowing how the story will end’ and attempt to control and warn and inject a form of fear in an attempt to wake someone up, but, this has been proven to be not a supportive manner most of the times. Sometimes I have to assess the situation and the extent in which something/someone is requiring a particular point of support, but in this I have to now at the same time focus on myself in moderating the way that I bring these points across.

How to do that? I realize it is a matter of letting to this ‘desire to wake someone up’ or to ‘have them see something’ that I am seeing with clarity and acknowledging their process, their self-awareness, their point in their lives and the situation they are in as something that they have created for themselves – which means we always are responsible to ourselves – and so either make it or break it as they say and understanding that my role in this is only assisting in suggesting ways to look at a situation, asking questions that can assist another to consider self-honesty, but I can never change someone with this intensity and impetus coming in subtle forms of anger or plain despair as well. That won’t work at all.

I have to honor myself and my self-honesty first of all, which means I can then honor and respect another’s process of self-honesty as well. As my partner just reminded me, one has to be self-honest in order to assist another to develop such self-honesty as well and my self-honesty here is stopping this surge, impetus and intensity within me that is trying to force change upon another, which is something that cannot ever be done, as each person can only ever change themselves by their own volition and decision to do so.

I can stand as an example of what it is to regard another’s life and process in their unique location, positioning, rather focusing in seeing ‘where they are at’ in their awareness, how they are approaching a situation, asking questions that can bring up practical solutions and considerations – but in moments where I see that they are not seeing through a particular veil of emotion, reactions, memories, experiences, I have to take a moment to Breathe and sloooow myself down completely and walk with them in the point they are at.

Here within myself I have to make sure that I am comfortable in my own body which means I have to step down from ‘prescribing my own discourse’ towards another which is coming from focusing only in my head and so, give myself time to feel my body which in this stage of facing a resistance in another to change, to see something, I am usually already building up a tension, a strain even at times within my physical body where I can notice my eyes are getting wider, my voice tonality gets louder, I can get out of breath, I can start speaking faster and faster with no space to leave the other to interact back or even ‘follow through with my train of thought’ because it is all completely driven through and as energy – same with typing, typing superfast and not allowing much space for another to go interacting with what I go saying either. I have to slow down and be patient, not be anxious about it.

I have to breathe and allow myself to listen, to hear, to read another’s expression and words, to consider them, to see what they are experiencing, how they are looking at a situation, where are they in their particular life-situation and so, I have to develop that humbleness and consideration in those moments wherein I can be in a position to assist another in a particular time or situation in their lives where I have to place myself in their shoes, to identify within myself where and how I have been in a similar situation or source from other situations that I have been that can be similar in nature, and so bring forth/share my own experience to share how I got to a point of self-honesty in walking through those times or situations, or how I am still assisting myself through a similar situation – so as to precisely stand as an example, sharing a potential way that another can consider for themselves. This I have to make sure I am sharing without the hidden agenda and intent of wanting to save, ‘wake another up’ or ‘having them see what I SEE they are still accepting and allowing in themselves’ because this is still coming up from a personal desire, and not from my own self-honesty.

Here self-honesty for me is reminding myself and understanding that I cannot ever save another, I cannot ever change another, I cannot ever impose ‘what to do or not to do’ unto another – I have to honor, respect and allow independence in another’s process of self-realization on whichever situation or part of themselves they are facing in their own lives, and here then My point of focus then becomes my own moderation, alignment and correction of my expression towards another.

This means, focusing more on making questions that can assist another to see, to practice living calm and stability as I am placing out these questions and considerations – to not create an expectation or a ‘threatening potential outcome’ as a way to push them to decide to act or not act upon something in order to create a particular outcome that I am considering is ‘better,’ which in fact comes from a deep-desire of doing ‘the right thing’ which is based on morality and a limited way of perceiving someone’s life process, when in fact I’ve seen for myself how if I had stood for and towards myself as I stand towards others in an attempt to ‘save them from doing the wrong things,’ I would have walked away from this bossy-me and still would have proceeded to do the things that yes, caused consequences in my life but at the same time are now learning experiences that I got to live through and work through for myself.

Therefore, I have to stand in equality with another, not as a ‘corrector’ but as an equal that stands in consideration of assisting another, walking by their side in their pace, in their considerations, in their ways of approaching things and expanding myself to consider their ways of walking their lives, the way in which they decide to face their life situations – with its faults and flaws- to embrace them the same way that I’ve learned to do so in my own life, to not judge it, to not see it as wrong, to not want them to ‘become’ or ‘reach’ a particular outcome in their lives because that is always up to each person in their lives to do so.

Here then I focus on myself, continuing to learn and apply flexibility in these moments when this ‘upsurge’ of intensity in my expression comes up, so that I can then flag-point this moment and understand I am stepping into the ‘intense-me’ and ‘lower the volume’ so to speak in how I express myself, assert my starting point in talking/assisting another, to level it down to a point of acknowledging and honoring each one’s life and process of self-responsibility, learning from their walks in life and being gentle in how I approach others because I know for a fact based on how I was raised that being reached out to through energy in the forms of control, imposition, scolding and threats don’t work at all.

Best ways I’ve been implementing in my partnership relationship is in fact based on slowing down and considering another, not pushing too much, yet making questions that can assist in seeing things differently and not expecting another to ‘change’ based on how I have done so in my life and follow that way ‘to the T’ –  but instead through sharing my own personal experiences in walking similar patterns and ‘where I am at’ in relation to it, how I go working on them. So I find it interesting that I have managed to get better at this ‘patronizing’ pattern in me in my relationship, because I have created a direct process of feedback with my partner in relation to this, speaking about it and identifying in real time how this ‘intensity’ unfolds within me – but, it seems that I haven’t extended this to other people that don’t always point it back at myself – like family members (except for my mother) and people I directly assist in their personal process of self-support or in regular interactions ‘on the streets’, but even on that one I’ve made it a very present point for me to stop judging people so much out there and instead focus on my own stopping of judging and reacting. That’s my point! 

Therefore, here I make myself aware of changing the way that I approach another within this context of intensity/energy charge in which I attempt to have another see the way I see things, or realize something or open up or ‘see the dishonesty’ for what it is, because, I will eventually become only a control-freak and a prey to my own imposition if I continue doing this with others in my life.  I have to make space as in breathing, letting go of my desired outcome/point of control and so focus on settling myself physically to slow down, to not feed expectations or ideas of ‘what another should be able to see or consider’ and rather keep walking at their side, at their pace, not on top, not in front but walking-with another in what is and will always be a process of self-support, because it can only ever be truly applied by each one/ourselves.

I can stand as an equal in supporting another to see themselves, but I have to let go whenever I can see and understand that there are more points to unfold in order to see/understand a point of self-creation, sometimes consequences have to unfold to realize what we are actually doing or participating in ourselves. And I have to accept that is each one’s decision as well, instead of attempting to ‘save’ others from going down misery lane or ‘making mistakes’ because in the end, it’s not about doing good and not bad in this process, it’s about transcending that morality and rather see for ourselves who we are in each situation, what can we learn from each situation about ourselves. I can only assist with observing such situations from an equal stand-point in where each person sees it for themselves, and how they are approaching it and then suggest ways to look at it, to consider certain aspects, to ask in a way for them to reflect about themselves and their choices and decisions, that’s about it.

I realize I don’t require at all an energy surge within me to stand as this point of support for another, I don’t require to bee ‘too intense’ in sharing something because the intensity, the control and imposition with which it comes through won’t ever have a supportive effect on another – the actual supportive words are those that contain zero-reactions, zero self-interest, zero-fears, zero-expectations, zero-control-freakism, zero-judgment and zero-neglect at the same time because it is a fine balance between caring for another while also allowing them to walk on their own entirely, because I would definitely want everyone else to also stand on their own two feet and not depend on me or anyone else to be able to live – it is about a process of cross-referencing one’s own life and understanding of oneself – that is always healthy when it comes to learning to see ourselves, to understanding our own minds, to have another ‘pair of eyes’ to see through us in humbleness and consideration.

So to me this is yet a very specific gift in my process and positioning within this Desteni Process where I am getting to walk as well some of my most ingrained patterns that actually come up in situations where I am in a position and role of assistance and support towards others, which is therefore a very relevant point for me to be in in order to learn and fine tune my understanding, comprehension, consideration towards others, to allow them to see for themselves and cross-reference whatever comes up. This is then being an assistance in a process that is always of self-support since no one else can do it for us, we always have ourselves and only ourselves as our responsibility, which includes my ways of interacting and expressing towards others that are also my responsibility.

I’ll keep an eye testing these points in real time whenever this surge comes up in me. This is something that expands and extends to how I relate to anything and anyone in my life and reality, I’d very much like our relationships to be of interdependence and independence where we can count on each other yet at the same time realizing the fundamentals of self-responsibility at all times, that’s the marvel of walking as equals yet as individuals.

Thanks for reading

 

Mirror- my error

 

Check out these great sites for self support and self development :


417. How to Become Your Own Role Model

There was a blog entry I made some time ago about the documentary ‘Come and Worry With Us’

397. Come and Stop Worrying about Money & Children with us

about one of my favorite bands and generally discussing the problems that come when lacking sufficient money while still wanting to keep producing art, in this case performing and so generally seeing a more realistic approach to the lives of the people ‘on the spotlight’ so to speak, however I realize there is another dimension there to look at and that is part of my lack of objectivity when viewing this documentary, because I had a particular kinship toward the band itself and the people in it, specifically the leader of the band who happens to be part of another band that has been well known for remaining ‘out of the system,’ giving few interviews over the years, rejecting prizes from mainstream music industry, having no lyrics on their songs yet using their titles and general sounds used in the music as a constant reminder of the turbulent times we live in – such as wars, economic depression, general emotional depression, worrying about the future etc.

So, within investigating this, I realized that the people I had ‘admired’ throughout my life were mostly artists that have been able to ‘make it’ into the system without ‘selling out’ or what I then judged as ‘making lots of money into the system while escaping from complying to “the establishment.” That was my type of ‘ideal’ in life, to be ‘out of the system’ – I once thought that was possible, lol – and still make good money and speak on the frontline of ‘the oppressed’ so to speak. I’ve debunked in the past this character but there’s a dimension that I had missed looking at in terms of how I had admired individuals that I perceived as a form of ‘warriors’ themselves, to ‘stick to their guns’ so to speak, to stick to their beliefs and what they stand for which I see that this particular individual mostly does.

 

Efrim Menuck

 

In the documentary ‘Come and Worry with Us’ Efrim Menuck actually refuses to place higher prices to concert tickets in order for them to make more money  – and so have more economic solvency – because he wants to keep to the point of having ‘fair ticket prices’ for the public. This is something that I would have praised and seen as remarkable – but, is it really Self-Honest to actually go through hardship just to stick to one belief? Or is it really compromising the wellbeing of his own son/family/band for the sake of keeping his stance of anti-capitalism? Is it really common sensical to have a constant war toward money itself and wage a ‘fight against capitalism’ while refusing to do any other work and so placing your own financial security at risk, just because of not wanting to ‘sell out’ or ‘kiss corporate ass’ so to speak? My ideal was to be able to also ‘stick to my guns’ and rebel to the system in one way or another, but back then I had no idea of how even money was created or whether there was a genuine possibility to be ‘outside of the system’ – which I now understand of course cannot be a possibility even if I lived in Papua New Guinea.

 

So, in this, I realize that any trace of creating a preference for a particular individual based on the ‘ideals’ they stand for and those ideals being essentially based on antagonism toward the ‘establishment’ is still idolizing part of the problem in this world, because their ‘qualities’ are based on opposing something, on waging war against a certain faction and that’s essentially re-creating the idea of ‘resistance’ toward something or someone, instead of actually focusing on understanding the problem and so developing solutions.  Efrim himself has said how musicians are cowards because they can sing about the problems but most are not directly involved in creating solutions – and most of the solutions that come from people that follow this kind of ideals are based on further revolts and protesting, which is no actual solution in fact.

 

art workers won't kiss ass

 

 

Today I was pondering why so many artists can see the problems in society , but all that they have managed to do is expose it in pictures, in complicated objects and abstractions that would take more than one ‘quick view’ from a person to understand the actual message most of the times. I have then seen that as much as art has had this role of pointing out what is wrong with society and mirror it back, it lacks any substantial process of creating solutions. Some have gotten more involved into what would seem as social or anthropological work, getting involved with ‘the art piece’ that is part of a particular community/in situ, however those are still packets of solutions here and there, while the more general type of solutions will always come from the greater realms that still direct our society, which is politics, economics, education systems, media, etc. And art is still from my perspective a niche part of society that creates meta-languages that only a few can understand.

 

I simply realized that in order to ‘create change in the world’ as I have aspired to do, it takes more than just presenting images, sculptures, videos to people. Sure, it is a stepping stone, a bridge – but ultimately it is one’s own process of self-change that really enables one to understand also the magnitude of the problem and so also the best ways to go directing ourselves to support this change as well.

It’s interesting that one of the reasons I wanted to be an ‘artist’ is precisely for the kind of statements an attitudes generally attributed to artists such as: ‘an artist won’t lick the establishment’s boots.’ I had not questioned even for one moment that in doing this, one is standing in a constant warfare toward ‘the system’ instead of realizing we all are the system. In this stance, one is acting as any other ego in this world that is separated from others, that is standing with some and against others, while having no real practical solution development process in it. In this it is about clarifying that it’s not about the process of creation here, but rather the personalities I had placed more value and as such an experience on.

 

Self Forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to ever idolize a particular lifestyle that stood for a particular idea of persona that I wanted to be based on my desire to stand ‘against the system’ without ever realizing how only an ego can stand in separation from another.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to idolize another individual based on the principles of ‘standing up to the system’ or ‘sticking to their guns’ as a way to exemplify people that would still survive and ‘make a living’ in an apparent non-sellout way to ‘the system,’ wherein I had created a sense of heroism toward people that would ‘dare’ to do this, and see them as role models, without realizing that in reality creating such kind of ‘stance’ toward ‘the system’ is once again perpetuating the problem as in standing ‘against’ those that we perceive as ‘the wrongdoers,’ ‘the evil ones,’ ‘the capitalistic mafia,’ without realizing we are all part of and co-creators of this ‘evil mafia’ as our world and money system and we would not be able to have the lives we have right now if we weren’t part of the system as  a whole, which implies that by virtue of being a human being in this world, using money, using resources, relating to others, existing in this world = it implies we are all part of the system.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to romanticize the idea of my ‘role models’ being individuals that were cryptic in nature, were antagonistic yet sad and dismal about the state of affairs in the world, which I associated with being profoundly ‘sensitive’ individuals and within this, justifying their stance of being ‘against the system,’ without realizing that this is in fact a victimized state of showing ‘the system’ what ‘it has done to them’ and also remain within such excuse to not partake in the actual process of self-responsibility and self-creation that is required to genuinely change things.

We can actually all learn how to coexist, communicate, come to agreements and work together within the system using our creativity for the betterment of all in a Practical Way, instead of using art as a way to only use representations to criticize, judge, point fingers and blame and taking the vantage point, the righteousness of being the ‘fair one’ that is doing ‘nothing wrong’ and can only resort to ‘complain about it.’ This is precisely how we have disempowered ourselves, by creating yet another bubble in society wherein all the people that are most informed about the problems, that see and understand the problems, that can even create ‘art’ based on it are not really working within the spheres where real change can take place, which is in education, in politics, in law systems wherein we can in fact change the codes, the rules and how we manage our society.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have surrounded myself with people that I thought I had admired for ‘taking a stance’ within the system, mostly of judging and complaining about it which I once identified as ‘powerful’ but in fact, it is the most disempowered state one can be in, and more so only channeling one’s observations into a song or a painting or a discourse against ‘the powers that be’ instead of genuinely understanding the process of changing the world beginning with oneself, stopping all antagonistic stance toward ‘the world’ and the perceived ‘evil ones’ and walk the actual process of self-forgiving all the antagonism and inner conflict toward reality so that one can focus on learning how we came to create this mess, this world-system problem and so focus our time, attention and dedication to becoming the solution, to creating and presenting solutions as that’s the real way we can genuinely unite in one single voice that stands as self-responsibility and no longer remain as futile resistance and antagonism.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself for having ever been in awe and amazed at people that I would see ‘standing up to the establishment’ or ‘daring’ to speak about everything that is wrong about the world and see them as heroes, as ‘superior’ individuals – without realizing that speaking against, shouting, marching, protesting and joining the antagonistic ‘choir’ so to speak is rather a stepping stone and a relatively easier thing to do  – it also creates a self-belief of righteousness and justice, but what has been missed is pondering how such reclamation, how such anger and spite toward the system is in fact supporting to create a solution at all? How is one’s anger, one’s sadness and despair, one’s decision to ‘not sell out’ in fact supporting to change the nature of ourselves as individuals and so with doing that, changing the nature of the world system that does function in a enslavement-mode.

Isn’t it only self-interest to create an experience within oneself of righteousness about one’s ‘beliefs’ and stance when such beliefs are defined according to begin against something/someone? In fact, all our past revolutionaries have become personalities printed on posters as an example to new generations of a perceived ‘way forward’ for change through ideals of change and a call for revolution, when in fact that will only lead to and perpetuate the ongoing wars we have.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to associate the word idol or hero in the context of people I have seen have apparently ‘stood up to the system’ but only in a fighting mode or in a ‘resistance’ manner, which ultimately keeps the war going between ‘two sides’ that antagonize each other and do not actually get to put down the defenses and work together in self-responsibility to create genuine solutions. This would be the new heroism, wherein we no longer have to ‘fight a battle’ to ‘win’ and so be identified as the ‘hero of the day’ but rather define here-oism as an individual that lives by principle, that commits to being fully HERE as Life and whose actions are aimed at benefiting him/herself and others as well.

Heroism means to stand in absolute self-responsibility and accountability, to ensure one stops all inner wars first, then a real hero or role model emerges as someone that won’t ever antagonize themselves with another, but instead lives the realization that it is only through self-forgiving our polarization, our antagonism and inner battles that we can create a genuine world living in peace and harmony, just as the one that many artists or ‘heroes’ have attempted to create. But ultimately, living in actual self-responsibility makes you no one’s enemy, no one’s ‘freedom fighter’ and so, war is annihilated when recognizing and living in equality.

 

Integrity is the congruence sticking to live by and apply living principles that stand within the consideration of what is best for all, that implies not only sticking to what one prefers or sees as ‘righteous’ but implies actually actively pushing oneself to become a self-responsible and self honest human being. This means walking the talk and stopping any form of hypocrisy by denying what is here as ourselves and blaming someone for it. All is self-responsibility, all is our self-creation.

 

Real self-change begins with oneself, begins with recognizing that this system as ‘capitalism’ is not the problem in itself, but ourselves as human beings . Taking an antagonistic stance and pretending to be an ‘outsider’ to it all is abdicating self-responsibility and creating a new self-religion, a trendy form of excuse, justification and self-belief that the battle against the government/ the establishment can in any way be ‘won’ when there’s nothing to win in a world where if we don’t actually get to work together, we will simply deplete everything that is here and we won’t have anyone to battle on any longer because fighting is never the solution, self-direction and common sense is. Why haven’t we realized how we actually co-create wars as we fight for our plight to freedom? Why should we even have to ‘fight’ for something that should be given as a guaranteed living right?

The solution for myself is once again to be very aware of any reminiscence of praising individuals for having ‘strong beliefs’ that can be disguised as justice, as ‘fighting for what’s right’ but in fact when looking at how they live, what they think and where they stand, compromising one’s financial stability for the sake of ‘sticking to one’s beliefs’ is not common sense. More so with artists, there’s a lot of creativity and engineering processes that are being squandered only in pieces that are shown in museums or streets, but still just pieces of matter, words or images that intend to open up people’s eyes but I’ve realized that art in itself as a material thing is is not enough – it can be a starting point, a bridge, an opening toward a certain perspective or view,  but currently we mostly lack ways in which to give a follow-up to that ‘awakening’ process.

That’s why sharing about this self-creative process is the most important thing I see is required in our current society, so that we can shift our focus from the fights and antagonism or despair, toward an actual recognition of our power and ability to change ourselves and so change the world. Sounds like a cliché, but I’m testing this real time and it works, and it is not a quick fix since it is like re-weaving one’s own life toward a supportive outcome. I can guarantee that you won’t be the same as you were before, but isn’t that the point of living: growing out of the constriction and taking one’s own self-directive decisions and choices in life? What a better way to do this but within a principle where all/everyone is considered, where one recognizes one’s own potential and so lives in the world embracing the current consequential outflows of our past, because we understand that cringing about it makes no difference – and instead, we focus on applying, living and becoming the solution.

 

Within this I realize that I have actually stopped following ‘role models’ and decided to rather commit myself to be my own role model and within that become a living example for myself and others of what living as a self-responsible being implies. This is then something that entails committing to live by the principles of life in self-honesty wherein I decide to make of my life my own work of art that I can actually fully stand for and so debunk the ideas of having to follow other role models that so far have led us nowhere. Not even admiring a great man that shared with us the process of Self Forgiveness is acceptable, because in admiration one beliefs one is incapable of standing as equal to another, and that’s the whole point of walking this process: to recognize our full potential as equals within our individuality, which means: each one holds a very specific key to world-change.

 

Life is rather short, we only got one life so let’s live it every moment fully in self-creation mode.

 

Inspire yourself with people around the globe standing up and walking the process of self creation:

 

Pointing back at me

 

 

The Free Desteni I Process Lite course is a first platform of self-support to learn more about ourselves, our mind and understand how we can practically improve our potentials and skills.


374. Living Income Guaranteed: the Real Capitalist Revolution

 

Here’s a must watch documentary on how the Pseudo-Socialist Cuba is going through capitalist revolution:

Cuba 2012 (BBC Documentary)

The problem was isolation, pride and a delirium to be able to be self-sustainable in an economy that depended on the Soviet model that also failed because the foundation was not to provide with the Best living conditions for All, but only give the strictly necessary which lead to poverty and an economy that is sustained by the tourism and informal businesses that are busy sprouting now since the latest reforms that open the doors to capitalism have taken place. One country cannot remain secluded from the rest of the world, not even if trying to remain within a so-called model of communism that has only existed as such in theory books.  What has happened to people in Cuba is that they are now happier with the ability to expand the jobs they were able to previously do within the socialist framework. People enjoy the idea of being able to settle in a property they can buy, do new jobs that weren’t previously existent – such as a real state agent, fast food restaurant owners as well as the potential to open up doors to the world in an island that has remain frozen with no real advances in infrastructure for over 60 years now.  Capitalism does make people happy, but as we know there must be some considerations to make of Capitalism a functional and sustainable change within a country and around the world.

 

Solution: a Living Income Guaranteed

We propose Guaranteed Human Rights through a self-sustainable system where all the resources are nationalized, using such profit to create social dividends that are sufficient to cover a Living Income to every individual that does not have a job, can’t work or is/isn’t old and/or educated enough to work. The rest, as it is shown in this documentary is an example of what would happen to the poor and lower middle class around the world with the implementation of the Living Income Guaranteed model, will be able to work in the business they choose to make more money than the one they can get as a beneficiary of the Guaranteed Living Income which will be sufficient to ensure that each individual is granted with money to make our Human Rights effective promoted by the Equal Life Foundation.

Minimum wage should be double the Living Income which means that if people get a Living Income of 15 dollars per hour – in the current understanding of our economy world wide – the minimum wage in any work should be 30 dollars to create the incentive that is necessary for people to educate themselves and go to work in the professional areas that will be required once that the technological advancements will be replacing the tedious human labor by machines that will function under the premise of providing the resources demanded by the people in a particular area of production.

Having a dignified life and going through improvements does make people happier after the limitation they’ve gone through which is what happened in this example of people in Cuba – the same process will proceed when a Living Income gets to those who currently have nothing; from there Education will be necessary, not to preserve a capitalist or socialist ideology or learn how to revere old idols that promoted death as a form of revolution, but an education on living principles, the relationship between individuals to be able to work together, to develop their creativity, language and mathematical skills to place them into application for entrepreneurial endeavors that are directed to improve the living condition of the entire society, as well as generating sufficient profit within a model where everything earned won’t ever be stacked up in a few man’s pockets. Just like the water that falls and evaporates to produce rain and complete the cycle, money as the water cycle will serve its purpose: to ensure that all individuals have the necessary power of acquisition that is accountable as part of public finances to be able to take care of themselves with the best living standard that is possible and sustainable for all – either through the Living Income or through their own endeavors in businesses and using professional skills to improve their lives and earn more money.

No one will be left behind

This is what will change the behavior of the human being: from fear and scarcity, limitation and isolation to social security based on having sufficient money that will be spent on what is necessary to live, without a limitation on ‘what to buy’, which school to attend, what health care service to choose, what kinds of entertainment to consume which will have to be a process of education in itself, since we are so prone to be self-indulgent when having ‘more than the usual’ that it will be also be a process to learn how to measure ourselves. But that will also be understood once there are no more sudden-riches behavioral patterns in consumption and one is supported with proper education and cultural habits to understand what is genuinely necessary to live, how to buy nutritional foods, preventive health measures, resource preservation and much more. We are currently damaging the Earth, the water, the air and the living creatures of the world by continuing to fuel the lives of our so called ‘progress’ as the massive consumption that produces more death than life on Earth.

We take the best of both worlds: capitalism, socialism and any other religious endeavor that has considered that we must elevate our living standard to the best position possible. We are all  Equals and as such learn how to Live as equals where no one leader or dictator will be perpetuated in power, only direct democracy will be the voice that dictates the way that the resources, the education, the businesses, social services, foreign relationships of commerce, media and communications are handled. The new Living System won’t have any precedent, for humanity is tired of the lies, deceit and cronyism that takes place in every system that has had a ruling elite with no integrity or real compassion for the people; our government as the people will be established by the people in a new political platform that is nor red, or blue nor with any precedent in the history of political orders in this world. Each individual will be voting for the best options that will be available to vote on – and if choices are not best for all, there can be no voting process for there would be a flawed outcome as an option to be able to be voted for as majority rule – this is the key to a functional democracy where people are educated on how the the world system operates and we can conduct the presentation of choices/ policy making processes that will always lead to a best for all outcome and never allow each other to have a harmful and abusive decision to be set on the polls to vote on. Ignorance will be eradicated by our own education that will have nothing to do with what we are currently indoctrinating our children in #schools with – this will also have to emerge from individual to individual for there is currently no institutional curricula that covers the essentials required to live in a world in a self-supportive manner which means considering the living principles of taking into consideration each other’s lives being always guaranteed to be supported by the living system we all have to work in and co-create.

For all of this we require to understand that as a collective, as humanity, we can join forces and make us stronger – we cannot afford to continue divided and conquered and if there is a handful of sane people in the world, we realize that the solution is not to give into fear of wars that keep the world paralyzed and stagnant in a fixed economy that will benefit from it, yet that we have all collectively accepted as real.

The solution to prevent World War 3 is to establish the Living Income Guaranteed where every nation goes back to sorting the problems at home, withdraws from any occupied country, dissolves their military and instead of employing people to kill, educate/give capacitation to individuals to educate, heal and teach how to work on the land that provides us food to eat. Countries must stop funding their own imperial endeavors, stopping all military expenses and instead direct their money to provide for the poor, the homeless, the ones lacking proper healthcare and reactivate the economy at home through giving more money to all, developing trade based on real necessity not based on the accumulation of wealth for antique purposes of so-called ‘power.’

The human being is the creator of this system, each one of us and as such we only require to get to an agreement of how to benefit ourselves, to cooperate, to agree on what is best for all based on the sustainability that the Earth provides us with, the same Earth that is worked to get the means to live and produce everything that we see around, that we use for our day to day living –  that’s the real power and we must establish this understanding as part of the overall system and not get ourselves caught up within the perception of us being incapable of changing how  our resources are managed and how profit is distributed at the moment.

#Money will become a tool, mathematical words that translate the meaning of life to be given to each individual as a human rights document, numbers that will be accountable and will grant access and guarantee by constitutional Equality each individual’s living to be the best one possible as a human right, to finally make of our human rights a reality and not just vacuous words that as Bernard Poolman said ‘were not worth the paper they were written on’ due to the lack of enforcement of their application around the globe.

The Living Income Guaranteed is the way to an actual peace between neighbors that would eventually lead to a genuine understanding of what it is to make of love a living word in the form of a living system that ensures no child goes to bed without food in their tummy, that no nation is under fire, that no animals and entire ecosystems are hunted and scavenged to sustain economic fallacies/bubbles that create addictions and abuse of life, but instead we all learn how to respect the Earth, the animals, the very water and soil without which you and I would not be here today breathing.

We first have to learn how to respect ourselves and understand the value of life – that is the real task at hand that we as human beings are endowed with along with the ability to create a mathematical system that can guarantee each individual to have a dignified living to make of human rights living words, a real happiness and real fraternity that is possible if we all agree that what is here as the Earth belongs to us all in Equality.

We all now know that scarcity and the economic crisis have been a performed lie, a manufactured with consent lie that we have all bought and it is now reaching us all until we take a stand to say: Till Here No Further, We Stand Up to establish a Living Economic Model, a mathematical and best for all administration of the resources for the people, by the people and ensure that those that already have more than enough understand that the inflation of their reality will not be continued to be built by the majority that has remained complacent – it is not about ‘the 1%’ only for they are also part of this world, as human beings that will also be benefitted from this living system – each individual, each one of us must take responsibility and realize that the majority rule must not be complacency and fear of changing the status quo. We have been the silent observers of our economic and educational conspiracy, a con-piracy as the lies and deceit that we have all believed to be true that has been used to steal and abuse one another with legal consent, the accepted and allowed crime against life is to believe that one is entitled by some ‘benevolent force’ to have More than another and leave others without any. All forms of disparity have been our point of self-dishonesty and as such we can only learn how to forgive ourselves for such separation and establish corrections to ensure we never accept it and allow it again.

The new laws to be lived by each individual are: Oneness and Equality practically understood as realization of each one of us being equally endowed with the gift of life, where we will live by the principles of Giving as You would like to receive, Do onto others as you would like to be done onto, Loving thy Neighbor as Thyself and through practicing these individual principles in a system that will be founded upon them as well, we will establish the real meaning of life which is nothing else but learning how to Live as Equals and for the first time genuinely call our lives a dignified living.

Investigate:

 

For Self-Education:

 

LIG

Artwork: Damián Ledesma 


206. Self Sabotage Is Self Interest

When our preferences as likes and dislikes become an obstacle to self-change and leading us to a position wherein we will be most effective, we must know: we are Still Mind Controlled.

 

Continuation of the Elite Character – Self Interest when wanting to ‘Change the World’

 

I’m continuing with the point of Self Interest and this time, I got cool perspectives from Mr. Anu – I am aware I can get to an extreme point of wanting to just ‘give it all away’ and almost deny to myself these ‘bits of heaven’ that we have left in our world without which, I agree with Mr. Anu here, we would go insane quite fast. So, what I see mostly in terms of for example, my current ‘lifestyle’ – ‘all I can say is that my life is pretty plain.’ Obviously this ‘simplicity’ is backed up by having enough money to buy food whenever I require it and pay for the rent/ services and the occasional treat, which is not so much buying physical stuff any more, but maybe going somewhere in the city every now and then or paying for my coffee, nuts, stuff that is not absolutely necessary to live, but that I consider are my bits of heaven – if you wanna call it that.

 

So, what I will be walking in self forgiveness are the points of Self Interest that I actually reviewed after I wrote my blog yesterday, and noticed a desire to be in a position of power/ leadership  so, what I’ll be doing is walking this desire and placing it through common sense. This position obviously is directly linked to the ‘elitist character’ wherein even if I was aiming at/ wanting to create a change in this world, I was not fully willing to give up my personal interests and ‘position’ in society. If I could guess the pattern that I have lived throughout my lives based on what I see within myself is being a dissident in society that would end up aspiring being in a ‘powerful’ position to create a change/ revolution in this world, but in the end, missing out the personal relationships aspect, ending up depressed or mostly discouraged and alienated from society, as that point of powerlessness is definitely something that has remained as the primary aspect of – also – Self Interest wherein I go into a giving-up mode and see it all as a ‘lost cause’ without realizing that it is just me in my mind making it all seem bleak and impossible, without even having actually placed into application my own realizations and be within the system fully to test this out for myself.

 

Thus, I am aware what type of weaknesses there are and these are also self-interest because at the moment it’s not like I’m living in a wondrous place safe and healthy place with luxuries, lol no – so to me giving up stuff would mean like giving up the weather that I so enjoy or giving up the ability to buy some peanuts that are quite cheap, or buy gourmet coffee from an expert, giving up going out for walks alone before night time and having a relative stable life with not so much money to squander, not so much ‘conflict’ either apparently. Would I want this to remain like this for longer? Not really, I’ve had two years and a half of it and I’d say it’s enough. So, my self interest is then more veered to that, keeping myself in a position wherein I am not living to my fullest potential yet because there has been an inherent polarity conflict of wanting to remain ‘in the background’ and then at times wanting to also be a spear head and some type of leader  – lol, so all about recognition and non-recognition as a relationship in terms of ‘who I am’ and what I’ll be doing in my life.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to allow me to limit myself and my every day living and actually directing me to a position in which I can in fact support me and become more effective and stable within my reality- not only for myself, but for others as well-  due to all the points that I have linked to self interest in the place where I am at the moment, wherein it is a comfortable ‘stagnant’ situation of limited ‘treats’ and limited or no-luxury at all in order to also create an attempt to ‘redeem’ myself from my past interests in having a ‘good life,’ which I see is the polarity point of almost wanting to ‘punish’ myself for everything that I desired in the past, which doesn’t make sense as who I am at the moment cannot be determined by what I desired in the past as fame, fortune/money and having a general luxurious lifestyle that I programmed myself to want to experience from the time when I was a little girl.

 

When and as I see myself wanting to remain in a limited position in my life in order to ‘prove’ to myself that I can be alone/ without much luxury, I stop and I breathe – I realize that limitation is linked to a point of punishment or wanting to ‘redeem’ myself from a point of desiring a ‘good life’ in my past and as such, I cannot continue defining who I am at the moment based on the desires of the past as that would mean wanting to ‘make up for’ what is already gone and done. Thus, I direct myself to realize that the limitations and comfort perceived is only what is comfortable at a mind level and that what matters is to place myself in a physical position wherein I am most effective in this process that I am walking and committing myself to live for, which implies actually taking on full responsibilities and pushing myself to be more effective at everything that I do, determining myself and my life to be and become what is best for all.

 

I realize in the end it becomes an actual point of satisfaction when directing myself to do what I am required to do and walk it effectively and this is something that I have ‘forgotten’ about simply because when participating in the mind, we seek positions within our reality that will mostly satisfy only our personalities our likes and dislikes and essentially a point of constant conflict that the mind is most likely benefitting itself from – listen to the Quantum Mind Series  for that /chapters 26/27 – and that is what I see is currently the obstacle that I’ve created for myself in my reality, a point of self interest to remain in a conflictive situation instead of actually dedicating ourselves to a position wherein we are able to support each other to create a world that is livable for generations to come.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that the sense of powerlessness or apathy that runs through from every now and then is still allowing me to be demotivated by myself as the mind, instead of focusing on the reality as the consistency that we are walking here as within this process sand that I see, realize and understand won’t ever give us a ‘positive kick’ as an energetic experience about my apparent ‘preferences,’ but that this is the actual self-willed movement that is a matter of principles and when living by principles of doing and committing ourselves to that which is best for all within the current state we are living in this world, will seem like really slow and walking almost in a futile way, yet, the reality is that this process is walked bit by bit, person by person and it must begin with ourselves. It doesn’t really matter how much it takes as I have explained to myself before how it’s not about what I get to live in this lifetime, but that I ensure that I play my part/ contribute with the ‘cause’ which in the end is ourselves as well, as we are all as one and equal and living this process for the betterment of all beings here and the world in itself, which is actually something that should not even require a motivation to do, but simply a single self-realization decision that cannot involve further energetic experiences once that we understand how such energy as positive or negative experiences, has become the very problem in this world, wherein we have only regarded how we ‘FEEL’ about reality/ our lives, instead of focusing on the physical matters that require immediate attention and will never be fixed by us feeling good or bad about it, but requires actual processes of education and correction at an individual and collective level.

 

When and as I see myself being trapped in the self interest of apathy, dullness and powerlessness toward the process we’re walking. I stop and I breathe. I realize that I am making up excuses in my mind to not move based on getting an experience about our process of self-correction only to give-into the  mind again, which is then an entire mechanism of self-manipulation. Thus, I direct myself to physically direct myself to continue with the tasks, points at hand that I am taking responsibility for and ensure that I remain here as breath – breath by breathe until I am stable here, self directive without any ‘background experience’ defining ‘who I am’ in the moment.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see how my own self-sabotage to not move is also based on self-interest due to wanting to remain having the ability to get my ‘bits of heaven’ such as the positive experience that I have linked to the weather in this country and the cheap prices to buy things that I like like nuts and coffee, or getting the occasional luxuries at my parents house, which implies one thing: I am preventing myself from moving just because of these small moments, tiny experiences that I have created as a positive thing in my reality and based on that, creating an excuse as to why I don’t want to move, which is ludicrous yet the most ingrained aspect that I simply overlooked because of deliberately not wanting to see how it is ‘the small things’ that I have used as an excuse to not move. Within this

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to ‘minimize’ my self interest to ‘petty unimportant things’ without realizing to what extent I was actually being moved by my desire to remain in an ‘non-changing ‘ position due to having linked ‘change’ to a point of distress and anxiety in the past. Pain!

 

When and as I see myself using excuses such as ‘pain’ and distress and anxiety when considering all that must be required to be done, I stop and I breathe – I realize that this is part of the mechanisms wherein I blow things out of proportion in the mind and pulling out memories of experiences to justify my current experience toward a future projection point which is not really acceptable at all, because it’s all being created at a mind level.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use self sabotage as a way to remain within my self-interested position which is really linked to my preferences as likes for a certain weather which I must be brutally honest is linked to fall and winter here, being able to buy coffee, going out for walks – as I see and realize that my point of self interest is really only a Mind-fixation that is in no way even something that ‘gratifying’ in terms of being something that supports the totality of myself to live and become a being that is an example of what Living is all bout, but I am in fact still basing my ‘enjoyments’ and self-interest as ephemeral experiences that I can absolutely ‘give up’ in order to move on to a self supportive position not only for myself but for all as equals.

 

Within this, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see how my excuses and justifications are just points of preference that I realize I have to let go of and not within the sense of me having to stop all these ‘bits of heaven’ but simply have to consider that relationship I have formed toward my environment and my so called ‘freedom’ at the moment because of being alone.  Hence

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to actually not want to give up my ‘freedom’ apparently linked to living alone and within this it is like keeping myself in a safe box wherein I am not constantly facing myself with others, which is a point of resistance that I created based on memories of a polarized experience of ultimate joy and happiness with the ultimate stress and inner conflict that I realize I never sorted out for myself and as such, only kept the ‘bad imprinted experiences’ as a way to sabotage myself and believe that I am ‘okay’ and ‘better here’ because of me really not facing the actual points that will lead me to get out of my mind and little bubble faster, so this is currently the actual self interest that I see, realize and understand is the most prominent and the real deal of it all, being alone. Which is ludicrous since we are never really alone, nor do I live absolutely alone, nor am I in a cabin in the woods, however being alone in the sense of not having to constantly ‘deal with’ another person/ other people in my reality because of how I have defined that to be rather stressful and uncomfortable which is then, again, self interest – as I see and realize that I am playing a polarity of wanting to live with others and at the same time still wanting to remain as that ‘oddity’ of myself of wanting to be alone. (as discussed in  the blog: 119. Oddity: Please, Leave Me Alone)

 

When and as I see myself continually using excuses as to keep myself within my ‘status quo’ of apparent comfort and stability in order to remain being ‘alone’ in my reality, I stop and I breathe – I realize that keeping myself in this position is only to satisfy my personality of ‘wanting to be alone’ all the time, which I’ve had enough of for now, I have realized that I am able to live by myself without seeking for a relationship all the time – and within this tis now to realize that we are not alone in this world and that we have to cooperate and work within/ as a group and that living in a group implies facing ourselves, pushing ourselves to be better beings and that I have to step out of my individual bubble – in order to actually live to the fullest potential that I realize I can give to myself, and that requires me actually willing myself to give up all these tiny ‘bits’ that I have defined as a positive experience in my reality.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use the current situation I am living in as a way to apparently ‘prove’ to myself that I can be alone, live without much money/ luxuries in a not pretty at all environment, which is also going into a polarity experience based on me not wanting to get used to the luxuries I had at home, the comfort of having most of what I would require or want as secondary-needs/ luxuries, due to how I have defined these luxuries such as going out for dinners, traveling around in cars, buying something that I don’t really need or even having the company of others as something that I had to ‘refrain’ from my almost desire to remain in an ascetic mode for the past two years, which is not really necessary as I see that this ‘ascetic mode’ is also self interest wherein it becomes another point of comfort that I am unconsciously refusing to let go of, which is plain ludicrous as I see and realize that I am in fact affecting others with my self interest to want to remain here and at the same time move on and direct myself to the most effective point and position in my world and related to my process – thus,

 

When and as I see myself wanting to remain in the current position that I am, I see and realize that it is because of the relationship at a mind level that I’ve formed with my environment and that within/ as the mind, I actually fear letting go of it for the constant provision to my preferences as likes and dislikes wherein I am only feeding the ‘who I am’ as a mind controlled by preferences and likes – thus I apply myself to be a self willed being as in the end, who wants to remain as a predictable robot of preprogrammed preference and likes instead of actually developing oneself to our utmost potential in the current context of our world that is requiring actual examples of what it is to live within a cause that will lead to a best for all outcome.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to keep myself bound to a limited position and with a relative ‘calmness’ due to how I have linked having a rotating position/ situation wherein lots of things have to get done to anxiety or distress or discomfort, without realizing that it is only based on the mind experience that I have linked such activities to in the past, which is quite a long time ago and thus

when and as I see myself creating the belief that I will be stressed and ‘full’ with discomfort when having lots to do in the future, I stop and I breathe – I realize that this is not a matter of what I want to or like to do, this is a matter of principle and that in the end, I see that in my mind I have polarized my experiences as only Memories that I am keeping as a reason and justification to define who I am in the moment, which is unacceptable.

 

I commit myself to direct myself to the position in my world and reality that is the most effective one for me within the context of this process and what I am required to be and become. As I see that keeping myself in my current ‘status quo’ is mostly out of fear of taking on further responsibilities and actually standing fully to my utmost potential which is the self sabotage that I must be aware of every time that I link my current position as something ‘good’ or ‘positive’ which is not really so, I mean I can see it, I would not want to spend the rest of days here lol – so, breath by breath I direct myself to the point and position I realize I have to take on in my reality and breathe through any belief of why I should not do so.

I realize it is unacceptable for me to keep valuing such petty things as ‘more’ than my entire self-commitment to life and as such, it is unacceptable to continue perpetuating this ‘secretive’ self sabotage in order to remain in a ‘secured/stagnant’ position in my reality – I direct myself to not allow further manipulation within positive or negative experiences based on memories or future projections and direct myself at the physical level of doing and becoming what I require to be and become in my reality.

 

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205. Self Interest as an Obstacle to Real Change

 

  • “Freedom of choice is now protected by the individual as it feels like it is free –in spite of the evidence to the contrary and even when it rebels– it only do so in ways that do not impede with its special comforts and thus –the system is safe from the group as the individual now act as a group through what it buys or watch on TV. So –you fear to lose COMFORT and CHOICE to BUY stuff” – Bernard Poolman

 

Continuation of the Elite Character

194. Let the Mask Fall!
195. The Righteousness of Evil
196. The Elitist Evil behind Relationships
197. Friends of Convenience
198. Wealth and Positivity a Synonym of Abuse
199. You Hate the Beautiful People?
200. The Make-Up Reality
201. Friends of Convenience: for a little piece of Heaven
202. Optimism as a Sign of Success
203. The Acceptance of Heaven is the Allowance of Hell

204. Opposing the System: Elitist Act of Irresponsibility

 

 

I would  judge people that would only spend their time focusing on ‘what to wear, what party to attend, calling their friends, sitting on their couch watching TV, going shopping, etc. which I deemed to be activities that only people that have no survival problems can participate on – however, I was obviously projecting the problem outside of myself and taking on again the ‘Self Righteous’ aspect of judging others, pointing fingers and blaming because it’s much easier to Blame than take Self Responsibility and see where and how I was doing exactly the same processes – different conditions, different scenarios but same starting point: having money, not worrying about having to ‘make a living’ and instead believing that through my wits and intellectualization of reality, I could create a difference in this world.

 

Well, what did I get from those endless hours of sitting sipping coffee with sociologists, writers, economists, poets, artists and plain dissidents of the system? Nothing else but always ending up with a feeling of ‘powerlessness’ while not having to worry much about it at the end of the day, because hey at least we were having money and studies to live, I see how even within that the point of change was projected ‘there’ in the future, never ever pointing fingers back to ourselves, I was so high up on my horse about blaming the system that I simply was absolutely getting an energetic kick out of it. All we would eventually realize is that  money determined everything and that no intention of change will do a single thing, nor criticizing will do a thing either which is part of what I was exploring yesterday in terms of the opposition of the system, of which I obviously participated in.

 

I was comfortably wanting to become part of the elitist groups of intellectuals that could speak about reality as politics, economics, culture ‘from head to toe’ and be revered for that while earning good money from the system for doing so – because of what I had seen some others in my reality doing – however never in fact becoming an active part of proposing a solution, because even then I was still only wanting to do it as a form of ‘resistance’ and ‘exposure’ which is how many of our current intellectuals and well-versed people can have ‘all the knowledge and information about how the system works’ – this being within the current available considerations that fall short when it comes to a holistic understanding of reality – and can even propose great sounding theories of how to create a change – but missing out the point of ourselves, who we are as the mind, how the world system is an outflow and consequence of this relationship of ourselves to our own mind has been absolutely missed.

 

Most of these theories are never taken to an actual political implementation, since they end up within certain groups/ factions of society that only seek to create a constant ‘war’ and opposition to the ‘establishment’ as a source of self-empowerment, without realizing how there will be absolutely No change in reality if we remain only blaming others, finding flaws without understanding the cause of such flaws, sipping our coffee in long hours of discussing the system, in conventions and global forums to ‘discuss the problems’ without proposing tangible solutions, or going to protest and then hooking up with friends to party, or raging against the system of which one is also being able to eat from; all of this reveals to what extent money is also a condition that allows us to ‘rebel’ only and be concerned in self—interested ways to make an apparent ‘change’ in this world, while being rather absolutely ignorant to the actuality of the process that must take place in order to Really in Fact consider even what an actual change in this world would require, which is at all times: ourselves, focusing at this moment on the individual and realizing that no matter how long it takes, education is the key here, and that as long as we continue diverting our efforts to seek to create a point of ‘opposition’ from our safety zones of ‘opposition’ and ‘dissidence,’ nothing will change.

 

So, it became rather part of the main branches of my personality, wanting to Remain within my comfort zone while taking on a seemingly ‘critical position’ toward the system, keeping my benefits, keeping my security and protection that money gives me, having the ability to ‘study lots’ to have all careers necessary to ‘empower’ myself  as a knowledgeable Act without Acting it out – this is how when getting to Desteni and realizing that I would Actually have to do it became quite a blow to my ego, and I can say that in this regard, I am barely only stepping within my own realization of what does it meant to really Do everything it takes/ whatever it takes to live out the words I am speaking here – otherwise, it would be no different to sipping coffee, theorizing about reality and expecting ‘world change’ to come while I remain in my comfort zone. 

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to believe that I could ‘change the world’ while holding on specifically to that which would ensure that every step that I take toward such apparent ‘change’/ revolution would not disturb my security and comfort zone within my reality, which implies: not allowing my own criticism toward the system to compromise my position, which is then being and becoming the absolute walking paradox, deliberately ignoring how it was only because of money that I was able to have the time to read and chat and educate myself about the system and direct such knowledge and information ‘against the system’ while also seeking to educate myself ‘more’ within the system to create further opposition/ criticism to it within a position of ‘respect’/academicism which is like wanting to use weapons to end a war – which does happen in our reality – and so, it reveals the level of ignorance we have accepted and allowed ourselves to deliberately create in order to ensure that We are Not affected by that which we are complaining about – this is within the standing point of the specific character of the educated/elitist antagonist of the system.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to actually initiate such desire to ‘oppose the system’ from a vantage point of having money, having a good life and only wanting to seek to do some ‘justice’ for the people mostly because of wanting to become a particular character in my society wherein I would still remain in a position of comfort/ power and ‘support others’ as well, which reveals how I was not willing to fully let go of my self interest and desire to remain in a comfortable position in order to create a point of change in this world, and I see and realize how this has been ‘the point’ that I have accepted as a limitation, because of still wanting to have the ‘good life’ at all times, which then becomes just another way of wanting change while holding on to an aspect of that which is required to be changed, because of fearing losing the comfort and general ability to buy/ consume/ fulfill my desires and in such point, I give into the same cycle of self interest that exists when considering having to do whatever it takes to create a point of change in this world, which certainly begins with myself and the decisions and Choices I have at the moment.

 

Within this, I commit myself to ensure that I am not deliberately wanting to stick to my point/ zone of comfort in order to remain ‘safe’ and ‘protected’ by the money that I have as a point that must be feared to let go of, and instead remind myself how Self Interest is The point that has always stood in front of any actual full-blown decision to stand as an immovable example of self-correction in this word. Thus,

 

I commit myself to investigate where and how  Self Interest exists within me, maybe not in the form of luxuries or comfort as money, but also as a point of further responsibilities and preparation that is required for me in order to stand as part of the actual change in this world system.

 

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161. Good Deeds as Future Investment

Continuing from 160. Pious

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define ‘good deeds’ according to ‘doing good to another’ and within this justifying my own feeling good based on what I had done onto others, instead of realizing that everything that I do ‘onto another’ is in fact done toward self as one and equal and within this, there can be no ‘positive experience’ when directing oneself to support another the same way that I would like to be supported.

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to accumulate good deeds as in doing ‘positive things’ onto others from the starting point of accumulating positive-karma and a positive reputation within the system for my own benefit, in this forgiving myself for having accepted and allowed myself to brush aside and hide the actual driving-factor to do things for my own reputation/ benefit, instead of actually doing it absolutely and unconditionally for another – within this

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to be hypocritical the moment that I would not want to do something such as ‘helping someone’ but because I had to keep up my reputation of being ‘the helper/ the supporter,’ I would do it from the starting point of simply not ‘messing with my reputation,’ instead of actually being fully willing to support another as myself, which proves to what extent I would be willing to compromise myself and pretend to be ‘something’ at the eyes of others only to not ‘spoil my goodness record’ of being an actual pious person that will ‘enlighten’ those that don’t know the road to do the same themselves.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to listen to a person within wearing the ‘good person’ suit, wherein in my attempt to ‘change them,’ I would deliberately listen and waiting for the moment to erupt all the ‘negative aspects’ that I had heard them say from the puritan stance of me apparently being already ‘beyond that,’ which is part of the ‘good person’ reputation that I believed myself to be wherein I deliberately pushed aside my own experience, my own deeds, words and backchat in the moment wherein I would take such stance as there being ‘nothing wrong with me,’ and within this existing in a superiority position when supporting others as in being the ‘virtuous person that supports the impaired ones,’ which is absolutely denoting separation in all ways and part of what the masquerade of benevolence creates within oneself: “I am right, you are wrong and must be helped out”

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to use points of support toward others as ‘points for my own score’ wherein I would keep score of myself being a ‘good person’ for having helped out people during the day, without ever actually proposing for example a change within the entire way that such point of conflict for many could be approached within school so that ‘I’ would not have to take on the pride and positive experience of ‘helping others,’ and instead support the educational system to be supportive for all beings equally, within the realization that if Many have the same problem, then the flaw is within the way it is being taught, instead of the problem being the beings not understanding it.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to Invest on my own ‘good person’ character within the realization that within building this reputation from an early age, I would get ‘doors open’ more easily within the system in the future, wherein I was from an early age already looking forward to way, means and relationships that I would use in order to make a ‘good living,’ wherein I would go as far as supporting my classmates from that starting point of thinking that ‘Someday they will be in a position wherein they will be the ones that will be able to support me’ and within this, not being unconditionally supporting others as myself in the moment, but actually see it as a positive-credit investment to the future, wherein I was aiming at ‘using my credits’ at some point in the future whenever I wanted and If I would require such ‘gears’ in the system to my own benefit.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to deliberately seek to create ‘political relationships’ with people at school, which were not necessarily ‘friendship based,’ but going straight to the point of being in ‘good terms’ with everyone in order to get a positive reward in the future wherein I expected me to be supported by others due to me being ‘remembered’ as having been a ‘good person,’ which once again proves that I was in fact investing on my own positive-feedback within my participation in the school-system as a way to be recognized by others and as such, ensure that no matter what, people will remember me for ‘how good I was in everything I did, ‘ which is plain self-interest based type of actions, words and deeds at all times.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to deliberate shove aside my ‘negative backchat’ toward others in the moment of interacting with them, and immediately play out this point of ‘them probably being able to support me in the future’ and as such, immediately shift my way of communicating with them to being more affable and open and ‘charismatic,’ from the starting point or vantage point of realizing that I could ‘use their friendship/ colleagueship’ later on in life in order to support ME, so I better behave in a friendly manner in order to be liked by them.

I realize that within this way of socializing – social-lies are kept from one another in what is euphemistically called ‘political relationships,’ wherein we all knew that we were building ‘relationships’ for our future and within this know before hand that we didn’t necessarily have to ‘like’ each other or be empathetic toward one another, but only see relationships as ways to climb within the system and to support each other’s interest as a way to keep ourselves ‘on top’ of society, which is what we were being trained for at school.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to deliberately be a ‘good person’ toward those that I knew had more impact within the political arena in my environment, due to believing that money and politics as part of my ‘relationships’ would be of great use in order to have someone to ‘aid me’ in the future if I ‘help them out’ at this stage- which was schooling years – and within this, from an early age learn the ways within the system of corruption and recommendations wherein things are much easier if you are supported by another in a position of power/ control within the social structure that being ‘one more in the mass,’ which is how I learned that creating a positive reputation within me toward others that I knew would be ‘potential future support’ was to my own benefit, and that helping them out ‘today’ would ensure my own help ‘tomorrow,’ which is how people in positions of power and control support each other to always remain winning, looking for one’s own benefit and position within the system, instead of actually supporting one another to be equally supported, wherein such corruption and favoritism would not have to exist any longer to be supported within the system, but instead equal opportunities as equal support being given as an unconditional living right.

 

I see and realize how I have used this point of support within my reality as a way to gain/ accumulate ‘positive points’ within my imaginary positive-feedback/ positive reputation chart, wherein I was ensuring my own survival and positioning within the system by deliberately using my ‘wits’ and ‘understanding’ in a place like school to support those that would not understand/ required help and doing so from the starting point of thinking that ‘I am helping them today but I expect to be supported by them tomorrow,’ which mostly implied people being in positions to support me to get to a certain job/ position within the identification of myself as a ‘good person’ and ‘hard working’ and ‘benevolent’ at their eyes, wherein the memories of ‘me having helped them’ throughout school would become the usage of such positive points to ensure that I am able to be supported by people, due to understanding how this world system works based on relationships and understanding the importance of school and relationships within school to create a network of support toward each other to keep us all in the same positions of power/ control/ direction according to what we were supposed to do/ be within the world system.

 

I commit myself to expose the system of values as positive and negative as the starting point of our entire personalities and beingness being driven to survive within such system basing our actions, words and deeds within the starting point of being ‘good to others’ to our own benefit within the distorted principles of supporting others the same way that one would like to be supported but using it as a way to support each other within a closed system of favoritism and recommendations used to gain or preserve certain positions within the world system wherein the majority of people have no access to such ‘colleagueism’ in order to ensure that those with already enough power/ consideration within the system, remain in such positions through being supported by those in power to remain in the same point of power above others.

 

I commit myself to stop existing within this favoritism system of ‘being a good person’ in order to await for a positive reward from my initial investment as the ‘good doer person,’ and within this actually walk the process to understand and realize how such benefits from being a ‘good person’ can only exist in a system of Inequality – therefore we can only support each other as equals within the realization that any benefit we currently experience above others is in fact a point of abuse that will no longer be able to exist once that the Equal Money System is in place and established as an actual opportunity to become an example of what giving and receiving in an unconditional manner is all about, which is supporting each other to live in dignity, supporting each other to in fact become living beings and within this realizing that there is no ‘benefit’ to await for within this all, but simply realizing that I am supporting self as one and equal and within this there is nothing to win or lose as it is part of self-support that I have decided to walk as myself within this Process of Self Realization

 

I commit myself to actually walk the principle of giving to others as one would like to receive in an absolute manner wherein there are no ‘hidden agendas’ of personal benefit to do so, and within this becoming aware of any positive-experience of upliftment or personal satisfaction as an energetic experience if such point arises in any given moment of interaction within supporting others, and instead, assist and support me to realize that there is no ‘other’ that I am supporting here but Self as one and equal, and within this, humbling myself to the point of realizing that it is only through supporting each other to get to an optimal point of expression, self-awareness and self-realization that we will in fact be able to assist and support ourselves as the whole to create a system wherein ‘good doing’ won’t exist as a positive-reputation system for one’s personal benefit, but instead become simple principles that we will all live by, wherein one’s actions, words and deeds are understood within the context of the whole being our responsibility and creation at all times.

This is how we transform the positive-thinking, positive doing as self-investment toward positive rewards in the future, to a constant realization that within giving to others as we would want to receive what’s being benefitted is not only self or the other person but Self as a whole as one and equal, and within this understanding that there will be no need to create relationships based on self-interest to maintain a certain position within the system, but instead actual empathy and understanding and relationships of physical interaction will emerge, as there will be no need to have relationships that support the perpetual positioning of only a few on top of the ‘social chain’ within a hierarchical system of values that would support only a few – but instead, the majority as the whole will learn how to support and work together as one single organism wherein any point of abuse is understood as a disease.

 

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