Tag Archives: living principles

573. What is Right? What is Wrong?

Or transforming morality into a practical assessment of what’s here for me to live, decide and act on as my creative authority

What does seeing through what is apparently ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ mean? How to step out of the morality construct that I’ve been limiting myself with? This all starts with the simplicity of judging certain things as right or good and some others as bad or wrong. Who decides what these are? I do. And I know, morality is such a big word and it has shaped a lot of who we are as human beings, partly because of religious constructs that were built to create fear, control and in a way yes, regulate some of the most harmful and abusive ways that we have as human beings. However, as much as it could have served a purpose throughout our past, we can definitely start evolving into a form of self-direction, self-authority, self-forgiveness and self-responsible change that doesn’t require an idea of heaven, a reward, a judgment, a punishment or fear to drive our change of actions other than doing it for ourselves, because ‘I matter’ because ‘we matter’ to each other and in what we create in our reality.

So, even if I could have said before ‘I am not a religious person’ ehm ehm, well, the moment that I am judging something as the ‘right thing to do’ or ‘good’ and ‘benevolent’ proves that I create a religion, a set of beliefs within me where I guide what I do based on an idea, a belief, a creed of sorts that I immediately come up with, without giving a second thought to consider practical reality. So morality comes in the same of that ‘immediate thought’ of ‘that’s wrong! That’s bad!’ or immediately jumping into defining something as ‘good’ or ‘benevolent’ and feel an upliftment about it based on an idea of what it represents in my head.

However, these are only ideas as judgments, they are all aspects or parts of myself that I’ve come to be so used to judge as ‘good’ or ‘bad’, constantly assessing and analyzing what I should or should not do within a value-system created through morality as ‘good’ or ‘bad.’

Ultimately morality is a construct of fear and control used throughout a phase or time in our lives as human beings where we didn’t develop ways to develop our responsibility as creators of reality, and so had to be ‘managed’ through fear, though ideas of burning hells and punishment – lol – just look at religion and realize the fear, the suffering, the punishment, the bliss, the heavenly pleasures embedded to ‘moral constructs’ of right and wrong, good and evil.

 

Well, I can definitely see how much I have limited myself within such mentality, which is linked to the whole construct I’ve been opening up recently of being ‘morally upright’ and ‘virtuous’ and ‘being an example’ and all of these words that I turned into another personality or ‘frame of mind’ through which I was at the same time judging, discriminating and eventually fearing doing, acting, thinking or considering certain things because of deeming them as ‘bad’ or ‘wrong’ or standing as the opposite of what I wanted to ‘show’ of myself or believe that I simply ‘should’ stick to the ‘good side’ of things. But, who defines what these limits are? I do and not in a very practical manner, but based on ideas, beliefs, fears, judgments, coming from social conventions, from religious dogmas, from fears.

But again, I am the only one in my head creating these limitations as ‘right or wrong,’ I am the only one doing this to me at a thought level where many times I’ve even refrained myself from ‘trying something out’ because of still seeing myself, my reality, my actions through these eyes of ‘what is right or wrong,’ and in a way ignoring or not seeing how that judgment of ‘that is wrong,’ or ‘I’m not going to do that because it’s not right’ is a limitation, mostly stemming from a social construct, a belief, an accepted limitation at a judgment level that I then turn into a real obstacle for me to not take the steps and ‘dare’ to do something or change something or test something out, step into the unknown which to me is a first step for actual change most of the times, if not all the time.  

This is where I want to look at what would be a practical way to, in every moment, stop referring to my old-age morality of ‘what is right and wrong’ and transgress my own limitations by doing a simple and ‘on the spot’ assessment of what is right for me in a moment, which is not about a belief or idea of it being’ right’ in fact, but more turning this into a looking, a seeing, an observing within a functional context, such as considering ‘what works for me in this moment? What is practical for me to do? What am I capable of doing or conducting in this moment? Am I willing and able to walk through this decision with its consequences, outflows and outcomes whichever way they might be?

Now here I am placing the responsibility entirely on myself, within a reality context that will have real consequences, real creations – rather than going into my mind and limiting myself based on an idea, belief or construct of ‘what is right or wrong to do’ in any given situation, which I consider is a functional foundation for self-creation, being ‘playful’ with creation and taking that necessary initial ‘leap’ that any form of change implies, while doing a quick assessment of what one can live with in terms of the effects, consequences and outcomes of such moment’s decision and actions.

Within this I realize how much I have limited myself in what I do based on this ‘idea’ of myself as a certain kind of person that ‘only talks about certain kind of topics,’ that is supposed to ‘always act/behave in a certain manner’ and all of these ideas of myself hide a wide array of constructs of why it is ‘right’ for me to do, say, act or belief certain things and why it would be ‘wrong’ for me to do something outside of what I believe I am only able or capable or ‘suitable’ to think, say and do.

Now, this isn’t about libertinage in the sense of giving a ‘free reign’ to ‘whatever I want to do’ in a rather foolish extremism of ‘there’s no more right and wrong therefore anything goes!’ where for example harm or abuse is conducted to myself or others – nope. Morality is definitely not the same as considering reality principles, such as ‘every action has a reaction or consequence’, considering doing onto others what I’d like others to do onto myself and others, to consider the responsibility of my actions and inactions, to live and give to others what I’d like others to consider giving to themselves and others as well as co-creators in this world… Now these are very ‘broad’ statements, but to me it speaks more about considering what I am willing to ‘live with’ in making decisions, in taking the steps to create something in my reality that I can now assess based on practical matters, considering the consequences, the practical outflows and potentials of what I can walk with, what I can learn from it, the purpose, the intent, the words I can live in deciding to do something – rather than only seeing it through a very limited – and usually instant – scope of ‘what’s right to do’ and what’s ‘wrong to do’ in my head, where no reality or practical considerations are taken into account.

I consider that it’s much more practical to make informed decisions, make a practical plan and see potential outcomes to then see what is the ‘right’ path or decision for me to take according to that context, that moment in time, my life, my experience, my moment – which cannot be defined by any ‘set in stone’ ideas of what is right or wrong – every decision, moment, path is unique in itself, according to each person, each context, in a moment of each one’s life and so what is ‘right’ for me to do is to consider what’s practical, what can work, what I am willing to walk through and live the results thereof, live with the consequences and at the same time, very important: be ok with making mistakes, not judging myself, but rather being able to trust my assessment in that one moment, being able to trust myself in being fully present in that moment of making such decision and ‘staying true to myself,’ whichever this ‘truth’ might be for me at the time/context and standing by my creative authority, taking the risks, taking the steps to do it and consider the responsibility it entails, which to me is part of an active process of change considering that we are mostly keeping ourselves in our seemingly ‘safe spots’ because of all the fears we got to actually take the steps into the unknown, which is usually what we have denied ourselves from doing because of deeming it as ‘not for us’ or ‘bad’ or ‘wrong’ or seeing ourselves as ‘unfit’ or ‘incapable’ for something…. But who defines that? Who decides that? We do, therefore we can turn the tables and take the steps to challenge our self-imposed limitations, within the realm of reality and consequences.

The practical process for me here is in the context of transcending and transforming this morality construct: whenever I see myself considering that I should ‘not’ do something because of referencing back to ideas, beliefs of perceptions of ‘who I am and should be’ at my eyes and the eyes of others, I have to stop myself and rather assess it in the form of ‘Am I willing to live with the outflow/consequence or result of taking this/that path or decision and live it in every step of the way?’ ‘Am I willing to walk this decision in this moment and take responsibility for the result as my creation?’

And this doesn’t even imply a ‘beginning or end’ or ‘sticking to something just because I decided to do so’ because who knows? Sometimes we will find right at the start or half-way through the process that what seemed ‘the right way’ when we made the decision ended up not being ‘the right way’ and so give ourselves again that creative authority to change our mind, to change our direction and find another path for us, decide on what’s the ‘right way’ to go in that moment which is more like saying ‘what can work better’ or what can function better now that I know that what seemed ‘right’ turned out to not be the way, turned to be the ‘wrong way’ for me in this moment – and again! Just for that moment, because: who knows? We might find it suitable in another time in our lives – instead of for example beating us down and bashing ourselves for ‘taking the wrong path’ or ‘making mistakes’ because that’s again morality construct speaking, not creative authority.

I’ve definitely lived for so long believing that I had to keep myself ‘on the right path’ all the time, which led me to then deliberately test going to the ‘opposite pole’ in an attempt to ‘transcend my limitations’ or ‘transcend morality’ but this is not about going to extremes, but about practical self-responsible assessment of what I’m willing to do and live with in every moment of my actions or inactions, and walk it through, keeping an awareness of what I’m doing, creating, and even if I ‘lose track of myself’ at times, be ok with it, knowing again that I got myself, my reference points as principles and going again at it, living.

This is where I disengage the ‘notion’ of living as ‘doing the right thing’ all the time, and instead learn to live life as the plethora of experiences that one walks through in it, without judgment, without fear. Sounds really nice and easy, but it actually entails to me in every moment that I see a limitation coming up in the form of right/wrong or fears and judgments, I have to stop myself and rather ask myself what am I willing to do, live with and walk with within this decision? Am I able to develop and learn and walk what it takes to do this? And then that becomes a more dynamic approach to life where I can let go of ‘what ifs’ and ‘fears’ that I have stifled myself with for so long.

Now again, it’s easily said, but the proof is in the pudding, so this is just the story board of the actions to take from now on in my life to see what works, what doesn’t work, testing things out, considering common sense, considering what’s best for all in practical terms of my reality, the impact of my creation, my words, my actions on myself and others – and that’s quite a physical process to take into consideration.

Ok, that’s it for now. Thanks for reading.

 

 

Join us in our process of Self-Expression as LIFE


569. On Sacrifice and Virtuousness

Or understanding the ‘Morally Upright’ construct I’ve been living as in relation to living a process of self-change

Continuing with this underlying ‘imprint’ within my personal process of self-change and the relationship to the words ‘being an example’ that can be read in my previous blog, I’ve seen lately the kind of words embodied within this idea of ‘being an example for others’ coming with a dose of morally upright stance. What does that mean? That part of what was motivating me to do things is to ‘demonstrate to others how things are done’ and in a way taking the high horse of experiencing it as a form of ‘noble path’ that separates me from the rest, that I am someone that is virtuous, commendable, proper, giving myself a ‘greater worth’ in separation of others, being dignified, dutiful… and some other words may emerge as I go opening this up, which don’t mean that the words in themselves are the problem, but how I have imprinted them all within this construct of ‘morally upright’ which will then require me to redefine those words to live them without the ‘experience’ of them separating me from the rest.

Here the relationship to being an authority to myself extended to becoming an ‘idea of authority towards others’ where leadership or being a ‘leading example’ is tainted with a righteousness, a stubbornness at times and an idea of virtue upon myself that is very similar to what some ‘religious authorities’ would impose onto themselves, separating themselves ‘from the rest’, being ‘more worthy of god’ etc. lol yet! At the same time claiming sainthood in wanting to help or save others, appearing as selfless and modest.

Now, this is a very subtle yet existent aspect of how I have been living thus far my relationship to this process of self-change, where there is – or was – an experience defining me in relation to ‘what I do’ as being virtuous, doing ‘the right thing’ in a moral stance that invariably came with an air of superiority, of ‘lifting myself above others’ in a very subtle way within myself and this invariably becomes part of the ‘process character’ where one believes oneself to be ‘better than others’ because of walking this process of self-change, which is nothing else but another personality as an ego that leads us back to being in our minds and recreating separation through the inferiority/superiority construct.

My experience of this wasn’t ‘visible’ to others for the most part – or so I think! – but I’ve been in it/as it all the way and it’s a very sneaky one because one becomes the ‘benevolent character’ that seeks an egotistical pride or honor through becoming ‘something more’ than others through doing what is believed to be ‘the right thing,’ the ‘good deeds,’ ‘being there for others’ all the time – and within this falling within a morality construct where it can appear that I am focusing on all the ‘good stuff,’ the ‘supportive stuff,’ but! The problem is that this benevolent construct of ‘goodness’ cannot exist without the opposite or its polarity, which translated in my case to existing in a constant judgment – and denial – of everything that is just not going along the lines of what I see is ‘the right thing to be/do/thing,’ the ‘truth,’ or ‘what is best for all’ and so forth, which invariably leads one to become this morality driven personality that claims doing what is most beneficial, what is most supportive – and may in fact get to ‘do it’ – but, in my secret mind what is fueled is a constant judgment to everything and everyone else that stands as the opposite of all of these words I described above, all that is ‘corrupted’ at the eyes of what I see as my principles and ways of living, all that is ‘impure’ so to speak such as lacking virtues, honor, respect, lack of principles, lack of awareness and in essence kind of placing myself in a very subtle experience of me vs. ‘the mortals’ that aren’t aware of themselves, that are still ‘weak in character’ type of thing, while covering that up with a façade of nobility, kindness and benevolence.

This is a very deceitful aspect to debunk because it is easy to say ‘well, you’re doing what’s beneficial, what’s right, what’s of beneficence to others, what’s wrong with that?’ or getting ‘compliments’ like ‘More people should be like you!’ type of thing which I’ve actually heard over the years in my case,  and again the problem is not about all of those deeds/actions and decisions to support oneself or others, but about how these decisions, actions and at times ‘self-sacrifice’ to ‘be there for others’ unconditionally fed this particular construct of the ‘morally upright’ character, where in my own mind I’d then compare, judge and go into denial of my own personal experiences and personal desires/needs/wants because of judging them all as too shallow, too ‘mundane,’ or lacking any genuine ‘impact for the rest of the world.’

This led me to constantly having ‘others eyes’ upon me in my mind where I placed myself with the ‘duty’ of ‘being an example to others’ of what ‘sacrificing yourself for the greater good means,’ and in doing so, I was in fact on my way to live a life of limitation and fears, which is ‘nobly’ said to be “of sacrifice and selflessness”, of “giving myself to others, “of “serving a greater cause/ a greater good” while actually neglecting myself in the form of denying to myself the possibility to genuinely enjoy myself, actually get to do what I’ve been denying to myself to do because of judging it as a ‘too shallow to dedicate myself to it, because it doesn’t benefit others directly’ or rather it doesn’t fit this ‘benevolent sainthood’ construct I’ve been living as – and within that, limiting my possibilities of being in a position where I could actually be of most benefit to myself and eventually others in doing so.

The bottom line is that what I just explained as this personality construct of sacrifice and virtuousness in a form of religious experience is really not at all the way to understand walking this process of self-change and I am entirely sure this is not the point of the Desteni Process at all to make ourselves into egotistical morally upright individuals that separate ourselves from all the ‘mundane filth’ lol and place ourselves in these pedestals of virtue and piousness. Not at all!

It’s quite interesting how I had become that in a very ingrained manner, not even questioning it at all if it wasn’t because of getting direct feedback on this through another’s eyes – of which I am quite grateful for because I tend to lack this kind of feedback – and this proves again that we cannot do this process ‘alone,’ but require to be in check with others that are also walking their process and can give us an ‘outsider’s view’ upon something that we’ve become so much to our eyes, that has become the very mindset through which we function on a daily basis that it takes some external point of view to see this with clarity, and in my case this also was shared from someone that had a similar design to my own so, that was a direct feedback of someone that has walked this point as well, which is what makes the Desteni community so awesome and supportive in walking this process as well.

I am also aware that the emphasis within this process is placed on ‘doing what’s best for all’ and how this can be twisted into only focusing ‘on others’ out there and forgetting about oneself in people’s minds like my own, where we tend to remove ourselves from the equation. So a simple reminder is to understand it as ‘being the best for oneself and so best for all’ as a result of that, so that ‘I matter’ is included in this starting point of everything we do, are, change and decide to implement in our lives within this context of self-change to benefit ourselves and in doing so, stand as our matter, as life to the potential that we see is possible and that we can practically live and develop in our lives, self change! In short.

I’ll keep sharing more on how this ‘denial’ of my own aspirations and desires within a stance of ‘selflessness’ led me to create comparison and jealousy towards others that I viewed as being ‘too selfish’ in their lives, enjoying themselves ‘too much’ while I was in the mindfuck and belief that ‘we should all suffer at the same pace of the rest of the world’ – or the majority of the world – and so, living in denial of me possibly being able to actually create the life that I want, that I see is benefic, supportive and enjoyable for myself because of considering that I had to live almost like a monk if possible, ‘detached from earthly pleasures’ lol!

And I do see that I turned this process of self-change into this ‘moral standard’ within myself rather than an actual practical consideration of myself, my life, my location, my skills, my context, my abilities, the person I am and want to in fact be and express and take it from there – instead of turning it into a moral semi-religious sainthood that would have led me to frustration, jealousy, bitterness, dissatisfaction and eventually becoming a fascist in my life towards myself and others, which is something that ‘resonates’ a lot with me in that personality context. An example is whenever I see military people like sergeants in movies, I can totally relate to them and almost see those characters as ‘kindred spirits’ lol! Where this notion of ‘the noble path’ makes one honorable, respectable and virtuous, better than others, superior, powerful, all of it lived as a character within a fake authority of fear that we sure have to change and step out of in our own minds and in the systems within this world in order to actually live equality in all aspects within ourselves, starting with ‘who we are in our minds’ and within me, this translates in ensuring that I don’t recreate this mindfuck of the ‘virtuousness’ and ‘morally upright’ experience in relation to walking this process of self-change.

Thanks for reading.

 

 

 

Join us in our process of Self-Expression as LIFE


557. Self-Leadership and the Message of Jesus

 

Being that today is a ‘Holy day’ it is a good opportunity to share some of the less seen perspectives that I’ve learned from Jesus’ leadership and message for humanity, one that we have squandered – for the most part – and turned into an image to idolize, instead of living the actual message of life in equality and developing ourselves to our utmost potential.

I was translating today the following audio The Birth of a Leader Begins with Self – The Crucifixion of Jesus – Part 105 which is in fact part of a series that speaks a lot about self-leadership and it was very supportive for me because it confirmed what I am seeing as a potential within myself to become and be part of the people that can assist many others to birth themselves as life, to walk this process, to tap into their utmost potential and essentially use my experience within this process – as well as what’s yet to come – in order to expand this potential to many more people that decides to start walking this process in their lives.

I also was translating another particularly interesting recording wherein Anu compares his leadership to that of Jesus and so he recognizes how Jesus’ intent and living purpose was effective in the sense of him ‘giving up’ his personal life (desires, wants and needs) in a way in order to place the message as his own life as an example for the few that surrounded him and became his disciples – who later on replicated the message and made it reach many more, albeit somewhat corrupted through the institutions this message came to be distributed through. But there are key principles that remain there such as the ones that are openly shared as part of the Desteni Message and that I have come to embrace and remind myself of and practice as I go: love thy neighbor as thyself, give as you would like to receive and do onto others as you would like to be done onto. Those are practical ways to live the message of equality.

However I’ll here focus on the very significant part that Jesus mentioned in this interview I cited above where there’s an actual openness for each one of us to consider living the message that was in essence truncated when he had his time on Earth, which was not to ‘follow’ him as a person, not to idolize him, but to realize we all could be and stand equal to him as self-leaders, as equal-leaders, where each one of us can develop and live to our utmost potential, which invariably then becomes a force of life in each one of us that can slowly but surely throughout generations result in the ‘change of the world’ many of us strive for, but it all starts with one being willing to live as such example, to share how we are walking this self-process and to assist in whichever way we can those that are also walking this process in their locations and realities around the world.

To me the internet is the way to now be and create our own hubs of ‘spreading the message’ of life in equality, of self-responsibility, of self-honesty where things like blogs, vlogs, group discussions can be shared around, reaching out to people that we would not have dreamed of possibly getting to prior to the invention of the internet. So, we have the infrastructure, the networking where all that is needed is us continuing to stand in such self-directed/self-leadership positions where we understand that ‘showing and sharing the way’ creates a potential for many more to wake up and see the potential that there is in this world, despite our continuous newsfeeds letting us know of new attacks in the Middle East, despite a few presidents going awry of their initial promises to stop war, despite the vast consequences that we’re facing in this world, I bet that what Jesus would come and share through his Facebook or twitter feed, would be to not lose sight of our potential, to not let ourselves be debased by only seeing the doom and gloom, the consequences of yes, what we’ve collectively created.

I bet he would suggest to focus on develop our self-leadership, on becoming assertive, directive, self-responsible, on being the example in our reality, being the best that we can be in our relationships with others, be living self-forgiveness in thought, word and deed and within doing so heal and restore the burnt bridges we’ve set alight in our endless quarrels against each other.

A message of unit might seem too challenging for now, therefore what I see is most viable is to start with a self-unity, because in doing so, learning how to in fact be embracing the totality of ourselves, we surely become a force of life that can be shared, taught, assisted to be lived by many more as well, and that’s what I take as my purpose in life, one that I didn’t have before I got to know the Desteni message which is nothing else but the Jesus Message as well. It is not an ‘easy’ one when we are hardwired to defend our egos at all cost, but it is the most honorable path to walk for sure.

So let’s continue to share ourselves, continuing to read and learn from each other because that’s what nurtures our lives and that’s what makes everything so much more substantial in the midst of seemingly ‘endless chaos’ at a global system level, that’s where we genuinely can do our part – wherever we are, no matter ‘what we do’ – where we stand united by principle and embodying this self-leadership as self-direction, enjoying ourselves within discovering and tapping into our living potentials and continuing ‘pass it on’ with the passion that Jesus did during his time on Earth.  

Thanks for reading

For those that are ready, here’s the series The Crucifixion of Jesus at Eqafe.com

And the particular trilogy I mentioned at the beginning of this blog to understand what Jesus’ role in this life process is really all about.

1.      What is Leadership to You? – The Crucifixion of Jesus – Part 103

2.      What is Blocking the Leader Within You? – The Crucifixion of Jesus – Part 104

3.      The Birth of a Leader Begins with Self – The Crucifixion of Jesus – Part 105

 

 

 

Join us in our process of Self-Expression as LIFE


512. Process Works!

Or realizing the ways in which we can genuinely change and face challenging times in our lives with grace and self respect

Lately I have been surprising myself in the possible ways to face what would usually be a rather uncomfortable, depressing, difficult and generally ‘shitty’ time upon facing certain consequences in my life. And here I can say with open words: Process Works! because this time around and from the start to the end of this whole point of creation, I could live and experience myself way differently than before, I was certainly not reliving the ‘who I was’ in the past even if the situation itself could be quite similar to some others in the past.

This time I made a clear decision to change myself, to challenge my ways, to adapt, to be flexible, to learn from myself and others involved, to be considerate, to in many ways work through the forms of ‘control’ that I have come so used to exerting towards others, I’ve learned to not see others as the source of my problems but fully own my creation.

Yet it didn’t all just stop there in learning to not over react or not get emotionally overwhelmed about it – while yes, admitting at the same time that there are things that need to be let out through experiencing some emotions and letting out tears through it all, but I’ve found that I do not remain ‘sinking’ into it for long, I stand up back up and continue doing my things, which is another cool thing about responsibilities, seeing them as a point of stability that one has to get to and attend regardless of what’s going on in my reality.

What I also did this time is to learn to walk a consequence in a rather ‘graceful’ manner, meaning, not judging myself for it, not locking myself into a bundle of fears and resistances or judgments about the situation I was facing. I made it a point to not see it as ‘the end of the world’ but instead understand its process of creation as something that I am responsible for and therefore now having to walk it through its completion.

Also while managing all the practical points required to walk this consequence, I also noticed that I could get myself to a point of stability with relative ease, surely after walking through some fears, woes and nervousness around it – yet I could remain stable, grounded, clear in my decisions and my relationship with everyone involved, to the point where I saw how even if something turns out ‘badly’ one doesn’t have to go through an emotional experience that equates such outcome, because it serves no purpose.

This relates also to what I shared about yesterday in relation to that dream that I had where even if I was already ‘tackled’ by the ox-goat, the worst thing to do is to get over emotional about it and fearful and locked out of oneself in a panic attack. I decided to take it with ease, in calm and stability, in a stance not of blame, spite or anger – even though it did come up partially I did manage to walk through it before it became prominent – or completely changing the way I behave towards others from a ‘positive’ to the ‘negative’ either.

I didn’t do all of that because I understood that I would have taken myself to an experience that one has to continually be in one’s mind to justify and build reactions according to thoughts, memories, emotions that are being held through blame,  spite and through irresponsibility all the way and I decided that I wasn’t going to be that again this time around.

Instead, without being aware, I did walk through it all in a rather amicable, graceful, stable and considerate manner, without going into a ‘positivity’ either or suppressing what I was going through – because stuff did come up, but my constant pillar of self support was also there: Writing, self-forgiveness, reminding myself where I stand, what I am here for, what my purpose in this life is and also being grateful for this opportunity to see for once and for all where I was requiring radical actions to correct something in my life and then doing so not within a starting point of supporting myself, instead of seeing it as a problem only or a point of loss.

In essence changing the way I decided to walk through consequence has allowed me to see a part of myself, a way to be, live and act in moments where before I would have only imagined chaos, drama, pain and sorrow as an outcome. And the reason is… because of this process!

There’s nothing better you can invest yourself on than learning to see through the veils of consciousness, of emotions, of ‘problems’ and directly learn to tap into your potential even in difficult times, which doesn’t make things ‘easy’ per-se, but we can change who we are when facing our consequences and learn a lot about ourselves in the process, which means learning to see the troubles and outcomes in life as opportunities to grow, to expand, to learn about ourselves as I am now seeing in my case, which is quite satisfying for me to say the least.

A last pointer here: not to judge yourself for whatever you have created, faced or made a mistake about, being in guilt trips and remorse leads nowhere but a cul-de-sac of emotions without a way out – best to learn from it, learn about oneself as that point of creation and stand for it the best way one is able to, which is considering and doing what is best for all and leaving aside personal interests.

I definitely want everyone in this world to realize this potential we all have, and how to work through it so, start today if you’re ready to do your own, because we won’t get to change this world unless we’re all on the same page of realizing our potential for self-change and actually live it.

Thanks for reading

Suggested audios:

Disconnected Starting Points – Demons in the Afterlife – Part 74

Stop Over Complicating your Solution – Principled Living

 

 

 


460. American Pastoral: My Reflection

I recently watched the movie ‘American Pastoral’ and I can say it became a very interesting reflection to myself and my past in the role of a teenage daughter within a family. In fact, I wanted to catch this movie in the theatres because I watched the trailer and saw the plot related to a ‘typical American family’ that sees the only child  – female – involved in extremist political groups that started shaping her character to a point of becoming a terrorist.

There were moments of her ‘early stages’ of rebellion at home that reminded me so much of myself, like how this girl is screaming at the television news and calling them ‘fuckers’ and just becoming insta-angry at what’s being said on TV. Yep, been there, done that many times, creating a constant battle with the point of ‘having the TV on’ and the news themselves, getting pissed and worried about everything that was happening, blaming the corporations, the politicians the ‘unaware people’ etc. – as I’ve written many times in these blogs already.

But this is not the only point, in the whole history I was able to see the extremes of what happens when there’s a child within a family where the parents are the epitome of ‘perfection’ as in ‘model individuals’ according to the usual social standards – the father being the popular American football player in school that becomes successful in his business/life, marrying a lady that had been a beauty queen and essentially having all the ingredients to be the ‘perfect family.’ Yet, their child from a very early age starts to react to that, desiring the opposite of what her parents consider to be a mark of success and tradition. She starts doing the opposite like affiliating herself with ‘political groups’ that want to essentially disrupt any sense of ‘American Dream’ or ‘normalcy’ at that time – 1960’s, 1970’s in America – starts talking about being anti war, anti capitalism and being constantly pissed off at the world, at the system and at her parents for being ‘so perfect.’

I could relate to that so much based on how I was back then. I didn’t take it that far into becoming an extremist, but I very well know I could have gone into some sort of extremes to antagonize – and that’s the keyword here – whatever is considered as ‘normal’ or ‘mainstream’ or ‘moral’ to any society. My way of challenging this was through the way I behaved, talked, dressed, my preferences, my relationship preferences, the ways in which I had ‘fun’ all of what I built as myself was precisely a way to ‘unconsciously’ rebel and set myself aside from the rest of my family, a way to make myself the ‘black sheep’ and ‘show them’ that I wasn’t going to be like them, which means I was existing in judgment of them, their ways/behaviors, preferences, traditions and the rest of ‘who they are’ in an attempt to ‘change them,’ to ‘make others care’, to ‘have them open their eyes!’– wrong way of course! But I thought that was the way back then.

Here, I know that many might have gone through something similar to this in their teenage years, which is kind of common at some point in everyone’s life, though here the key is looking at creating a healthy balance between awareness and ignorance, between considering ‘the world out there’ and one’s own life and doings.  Therefore I share this so as to not follow through the ways of the people in the movie where they start reprimanding and preventing the girl from having contact with others, only causing the inevitability of her running away from home – but instead, be able to understand that phase of ‘awakening’ of sorts that many teenagers might go through and so, making it that phase where parents can be understanding and considerate of that phase, not jumping into antagonizing it or fearing it or attempting to curb it with ‘locking them up’ either – in a school or their room or ‘away from home’, but creating a space of comprehension of what this desire to ‘show the bad and the ugly’ of the world and being interested in acknowledging it in fact means, which is also why as parents one would have to first and foremost have already gone through that phase of also developing some introspection to be willing to face and see all those things that we usually hide away from in the idea of ‘ignorance is bliss’.

 

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In the movie the daughter becomes that embodiment of ‘becoming aware of all the things that the parents were oblivious of’ or simply not caring much about – yet she took it to an extreme in order to make a statement, in order to ‘rebel’ against the status-quo. Yet she would eventually find out that becoming an ‘extremist’ is not the way forward and it gets to a situation where it compromises her own health and stability for the sake of ‘caring for the world or others’ and turning it into a religion, which is what happened to her.

But without going into the movie itself so much, bringing it back to myself I could see how I could have gone into certain extremes in my life in some similar ways as Merry in the movie, and I am so thankful that I found the Desteni message relatively early on in my life to prevent myself from going further down the rabbit hole and till this day, still walk my process of ‘stopping antagonizing’ the world, stopping my anger and sadness in relation to all things that we usually go blissfully unaware of, realizing that becoming emotional and a ‘fighter’ myself against everyone is not the way, will not show to people an answer but only will endorse fighting and blaming endlessly, which is pointless, absolutely pointless to the objective of learning self-responsibility and actually doing something about it to stand as that solution we usually only get ‘pissed’ about others not doing so for themselves or ‘the world.’

Here then I can stand as proof that no matter how much one gets angry/pissed at ‘the world’ or attempts to do certain extreme ways to ‘get people’s attention’ it one won’t actually change anything, it won’t get a message through either, one won’t actually in fact contribute to anything but only enhance the usual ‘war mentality’ when we go ‘fighting against everything that we define is wrong!’ and becoming of a belligerent nature that is ‘non-stopping’ for all the wrong reasons. I can see myself in that diligence and belligerence that Merry – the daughter – had in so many ways, but I’ve learned to redirect that diligence to my own self-support, to supporting others to learn how to also stand and live by principles that we can absolutely then prove to ourselves and show to ourselves what it means to ‘be the solution’ in this world, instead of going fighting and blaming and even inflicting damage upon others in order to ‘make a statement.’

It’s really silly how the protesting nature exists in us which has its origins in our tantrums as children and making it a point to ‘possess’ ourselves with anger and create a whole drama to get what we want – well at least that’s what happened in my case and even if I didn’t get what I wanted, I developed a relationship to anger from a very early age and later on suppressed it in so many ways, only to later on have to re-open it through this process of knowing myself, taking responsibility for my mind, my body, my everyday living and this thus becoming a point that I have been walking for some years now in order to Stop the fight within myself and ‘towards others in the world’ – but instead understand my reactions, decide to stop them in the realization that: my anger, my rage won’t do anything in this world of substantial change, it doesn’t nurture anything, it only feeds the war mentality.

So I instead self-forgive these emotional experiences as the ‘habitual me’ I had become, and direct myself to focus on my own self-creation which practically means going changing, aligning, redirecting every bit of myself that may want to ‘slip through the cracks’ into the old patterns of ‘blame’ and ‘anger’, then I make it a point to rather change that which I judge ‘outside’ in the inside of myself, learning to live words that are supportive and dedicating my life to do this with myself and those that I come to interact and support on a daily basis.

This then prevents any ‘extremist’ behavior, this then prevents ‘terrorists’ as well, this then prevents sects, cults and religious extremism where people get so diligent and belligerent with a set of beliefs that they are willing to ‘walk over others’ – harm, abuse, discriminate, hate – in order to ‘make a point’ that stands in a morality point of what’s good or bad, missing out the equality equation: what’s best for all, what’s the common sense solution, what’s our common/one and equal responsibility for what exists in this world, what’s humbleness in considering others?

And these set of principles and questions above has assisted me a lot whenever my ‘belligerent and extremist mindset’ wants to pop out, fueled with some righteousness which usually becomes a way to justify our anger or hatred, which is once again only self-interest, only believing it will ‘make a point’ but it doesn’t, it only alienates people, it only makes us walking ‘angry fits’ that show no solution at all.

Instead  I’ve found and proven that actually developing humbleness, consideration, embracing others as myself is a much more self-challenging process because then I don’t pose myself as ‘superior’ and ‘more aware’ than others believing ‘I know what’s right and wrong’ –  but instead have to challenge myself to find ways to talk to any person, about any topic, understand ‘where they are’ in their life/process of awareness and recognize that the best way to assist anything or anyone in this world, is by first focusing on changing me, stopping my belligerent nature and instead becoming an embracing one, one that understands what ‘living as equals’ in fact means, and this is then the process here which has actually supportive results that emerge as ripples here and there, without me even having to ‘push’ for it, because we simply become the ‘living words,’ we just are being the living examples and that’s as far as we can go when it comes to ‘changing the world’ really, doing so with one’s words, thoughts and deeds in every  moment that we are alive… but wanting to change ‘others’ and ‘fighting them’ is definitely not the way at all.

So, I suggest checking out this movie also for parents because the relationship between them and toward the child is quite an interesting one, if anything one that can leave aspects to learn how to prevent to the extremes in the story, and rather focusing on channeling/redirecting a teenager’s ‘awakening’ into one of self-creation and self-support  

Enjoy 🙂

 

American Pastoral Merry

 

If you’d like some support in preventing and being 1+ person that stands up for life in a practical day to day living manner, check out:


404. Deconstructing Culture as Myself

 

As I continue my self-investigation it seems that realizing the fact that we all have been preprogrammed individuals following a very specific ‘plan’ that involved conditioning ourselves to become a certain role/personality in our minds and never question it,  wasn’t still completely grasped within me when it comes to seeing culture and how it has been specifically designed to support particular agendas that have led to various ‘cultural movements’ that within me I still wanted to believe were attempts of us as human beings trying to ‘break-through’ or ‘break-free’ – lol – but mostly managing to break ourselves further through imprinting certain behaviors, ideas, concepts, morals, ‘world vision’ that became actual distractors in the sense that none of these points would be useful or supportive for a genuine change in this world, but instead it was the patterning and standardization of what we would think, what we would understand as ‘freedom’ and what we would find entertaining or alluring in our lives, which is also containing the ways in which we see/define/categorize and think ourselves and everyone/everything else, which is mind control through the most ‘subtle means’ such as television/media/arts and everything that is usually reached by the average person, even if such person doesn’t go to school for example.

 

All of this was part of the ‘greater plan’ to be perpetually enslaved to our own constant desire to experience, to be ‘hooked on energy’ so to speak which is what we accepted as our every day living, our every day ‘drive’ and motivation to go to work, do the exact same things every day to earn a living and then come home and be able to relax while getting ‘updated’ on ‘what is going on in our minds’ which is what then becomes part of your passive indoctrination into new fascinations, new obsessions, new desires to consume, body types, new personalities, new things to essentially get ourselves occupied with in our minds which became a self-inflicted way to accept and allow ourselves to dive into complacency of how this system operates, since we mostly came to conclude that ‘As long as I can have my free time to do whatever I like doing to relax and entertain myself and those around me are protected ($),  who cares whatever else is going on in the world?’ – we even have gotten to the point of praising our enslavement by idolizing those that we have accepted and allowed as ‘masters’ in our world and gullibly thinking that we can someday reach/rich ‘that top’… without realizing the system is structured to not allow anyone else to get to such positions, but be constantly reminded ‘they can’ if they just hit the jackpot like stars do nowadays with reality shows, singing contests and whatnot. It’s All around us and no matter if kids are homeschooled, kids will still be having a TV, internet, peers that will simply be also the product of all of this so, we have to establish principles in order to direct ourselves within it and so the younger more impressionable minds too.

 

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In my case I linking what should have been rather obvious to me from the time that I became more ‘acquainted’ with TV at the age of 7, specifically cable TV and American TV Channels. But also from the books that I read throughout my teenage years, I was still holding on to them and the writers as proof of what I believed was an attempt of us to ‘breakthrough’ or ‘step out of the system’ when it comes to human creativity and other creations like music, fine arts, films – all of the ‘marvels’ of the world that I once saw myself being ‘inspired by’ in order to overcome my own inner conflict which was in fact first of all created by everything that I began watching on TV as I had no actual ‘worries’ in my life as such. I can say I am a genuine product of spending childhood watching MTV for example. So, I’ve been finding out how it is that these ‘artists’ were in fact used or let’s place it in a more tangible way: their own creativity was rather used in order to further certain agendas related to ‘pushing the envelope’ when it comes to instilling ‘new’ ideas, personalities, fantasies, personalities, ‘ideologies’ and even addictions within people, all of it paid with what is called fame and fortune wrapped in the package of ‘celebritism’ or artistic personalities or eccentrics that portrayed the apparent ‘perfect ways’ to ‘escape the system’ – to present the illusion of ‘yes, anyone can get to the top!’ or ‘Anyone can beat the system and escape!’  and bam! There I went, right into it as far as I could when I was into aiming at doing/becoming like certain personalities and doing what they did and living their life.

 

Now within this there’s also a point to consider how it is not only some evil cabal’s plan to complete their ‘great work’ and have all these stereotypes, morals, behaviors, ideas being imprinted in everyone’s minds through manufacturing culture and all of us believing that artistic manifestations were evidence of ‘man’s evolution’ – which in essence as such, evolution is just consciousness upgrading itself, which means there’s no real Self-Awareness in it, just new ‘trends’ that could be sold to people in an attempt to fulfill the constant desire to progress, to advance, to ‘become better’ – lol – not realizing we haven’t ‘evolved’ an iota from the moment of our creation, only the scenarios have changed and we have seen our ‘technology’ create the illusion that we have changed, but we haven’t, at all.

 So this is to understand that the history we have been taught in schools of course is taught by the winners, those that have created the wars and have perpetuated the idea of how a god would choose who the monarchs would be, and so forth – all of it which was usually ‘backed’ by the evidence of artistic creations used as another alibi to confirm certain theories of our evolution. But in reality, a lot of it has been transfixed in order to suit certain theories to, once again, advance certain notions of evolution, of real change and human refinement, simply to continue justifying what we have as ‘arts’ today which have mostly become part of the dumbification or downgrading of ourselves as individuals in order to promote carelessness, apathy, destruction, chaos, mental disorders, the destruction of any value or principle but only shock and disturb to such an extent that it becomes a ‘norm’ nowadays in what we call our entertainment, which is really entrainment.

Once we get to know of the actual history – through currently non-institutionalized sources of course – of how our culture has been engineered as a necessary tool of propaganda to back the ‘story’ of ‘how things are/how they have been’ and paving the way to ‘how things will be’ there is no doubt that we are continuing to lock ourselves in these ideals based on what we get/absorb from the media/environment around us, which is nothing else but the same mind patterns made ‘enjoyable’ just like junk food that one can get addicted to: it tastes good, you then crave for it but nevermind really getting to know about the lack of nutritional content.  In essence our culture has become the glorification and legitimization of ‘our human nature’ as ‘who we are as the mind,’ separated from reality into the fictional stories that we could spend our entire lifetime creating of ourselves as personalities, as ‘characters’ in our own ‘movie’ that we actually begun thinking we had to create as ‘our lives’ and ‘our relationships.’ It’s been very interesting to me to see my own brainwashing and how my own relationships, my own thoughts/ideas/fixations were all imprints that I took from music, music videos, books, TV shows and essentially immersing myself in a culture that I wanted to belong to at the time – American Culture – because of loathing ‘my own culture’ which is what I had then perceived as the low-life Mexican Culture and as such never realizing I was actually then going to be my own reference as to ‘who one becomes’ when continually watching American TV, which I did for the most part from age 7 till probably 15-16 or so.

 

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CULTure is the perfect way to entrain ourselves into consciousness, ‘what everyone is thinking about’ and ‘what’s talked about’ which comes in the form of our news, TV shows, movies, music, etc. containing components as behaviors, personalities, thinking patterns, fashion, attitudes, morals, obsessions, addictions, etc. – all of it having ‘profitable’ purposes but goes beyond that and into the necessary role of providing the ‘circus for the masses’ to ensure that this time, the Holy Roman Empire does not fall for not giving enough bread and circus to the people. One only has to have a look around us and see that it’s easier to talk to someone about a TV show than politics or economics; it’s easier to strike a conversation with someone about a movie than it is to discuss our emotionally driven tendencies to buy products as way to compensate for some kind of ‘emotional need.’ Culture has always been the way to perpetuate a mindset, a way to legitimize ‘how life is lived’ and ‘how things are done,’ what is ‘cool’ and what is not, which essentially consolidates our usually used as an excuse to not change ‘human nature’ – culture is its own PR campaign that we are then taught in schools as part of our history and ‘ethics’ so that we are reminded that ‘there’s ALWAYS been someone at the top of the food chain, there’s ALWAYS been slaves that are disempowered, deal with it, try to always aim at the top and enjoy the show while it lasts.’

Currently if one cannot see the actual agendas for further depravity, lack – because they were never ‘lost’ of any living principles and the ‘Do as Thou Wilt’ mentality to give continuation to our ‘age old’ culture, one must be very, very brainwashed – not to worry though, it’s not too late yet. Nowadays sexual depravity is the ‘norm’ when it comes to the idea of ‘sexual liberation’ and female empowerment means stripping down in front of crowds and being praised by millions as some kind of ‘queen.’ Another example is how within our ingrained desire to ‘feel free’ the idea of ‘the rebel’ or the ‘anti-system’ became part of the social engineering process to always contain and control any form of actual break-through within individuals, which is the predictable way of acting if you see that something is ‘not right’ and your are being abused, you then aim and attempt to ‘break free’ from the oppressor by opposing, judging, antagonizing and denying it, revolting against it which are all the ‘anti’ movements that have become part of the systematic and predictable antithesis processes to actually Contain the people within such stance/roles and behaviors for which ‘the system’ as we have all co-created it was always ready to thrown back some ‘solution’/synthesis to further control. It’s just following what Lenin said in the lines of If you want to control the opposition, take the head of it, and you can see that all ‘leaders’ and role models in arts and so-called revolutionary people have been also part of perpetuating the same status quo, even if they were not aware of.

 

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To prove this point in terms of realizing how our culture has not been one that supports life, I bet that you have most likely never seen a movie pointing out how life is not about participating in our own mind as thoughts, emotions or feelings… or becoming self-responsible, or empowering each other to become the actual directors of our lives, of how poverty could be eradicated if we all partake in political solutions – not just one lucky good-doer leader here and there – not at all, instead we create the opposite and as such, it becomes what occupies our mind at a conscious level, it’s what suits our ‘human nature’ which is that of blame, vengeance, victimization…  just look at V for Vendetta that became the brainwashing mechanism for everyone at Occupy Wall street believing they had some kind of ‘power’ to oust ‘the bankers’ while seeking revenge – lol, fascinating how MOVIES are in fact dictating how we even ‘revolt’ nowadays, isn’t it? Not to mention the masks that became part of protests since 2011 and specifically the ‘anonymous movement’ are copyrighted to Time Warner, thank you for your contribution to one of the five top corporations that run the media in this world – wink, wink. How have we accepted and allowed to become SO predictable and SO Brainwashed and still fall for it? Easy, the same culture has become the only ‘soup of thoughts’ we all swim in.

 

 

This is precisely WHY ‘going against the system’ is just becoming the predictable pattern within the foreseeable attempts to ‘break free’ from our minds which is just playing the role of becoming the dark pole to the white counterpart or ‘going in the opposite direction,’ confirming our ‘dialectic’ predictable mentality that was also part of what ‘great philosophers’ left on Earth…  it is really only giving a name to the mechanisms in which we operate in our own minds – no big discovery, only making visible what we already exist as in our polarity mind-constructs of good and bad, right and wrongs, positive and negatives caging ourselves into oblivion within Energy and the illusion of ‘breaking free’ – all of it being the ‘building blocks of the illusion’ that we can call culture formed by the massive distribution and repetition of ideologies, images, sounds = all created in and as the image and likeness of who we are as the mind and its mechanisms, hence the importance of knowing thyself and becoming Aware of what one thinks, what principles one lives by, how we created our personality, what are our goals in life and where did we take those ideals from? Why do we dress a particular way? Why do we like a particular set of movies? Why do we Feel differently toward things, people, places, music …. There are so many theories and attempts to debunk the origin of our culture and all I can remember from it is that as human history it ends up when ‘hitting a wall’ where no man has gone beyond – before 2006 – and attributing everything to god or a creator and as such, for example seeing the origin of art as having some kind of magical-religious purposes…. Oh yes, that means core programming for enslavement within the idea of ‘higher someone’ dictating everything we do and because we could not understand it, we came to draw it or paint it or sculpt it so that it would later on become our way to solidify the same plot of what we have come to accept and allow as ‘how things have always been,’ and even learned how to revere it as well! That is us at the dawn of our species, and that is still us at the time as well. No evolution has taken place whatsoever.

 

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Coming back to my own case here, it’s cool and rather necessary for me to debunk what I see I had wanted to hold on to as some kind of belief in ‘human creativity spark’ or a bit of ‘romanticism’ when It comes to human expression and sure, the works and creations themselves can still be very well done, but it’s definitely not something ‘special’ or as an attempt to ‘break through’ some kind of programming – lol –  it’s rather the opposite. Once one starts seeing and understanding the ‘big picture’ and how these personalities or built-up stars play a role within the whole scheme and get to understand who paid them, for what purpose, within the context of which agenda, any remains of romanticism or ‘out of the box’ hopes upon artists just goes down to the drain as it should, because it was never ‘real’ anyways, it was never intended to honor and support life, so why praising something or someone that I personally only used to confirm my own existence as a mind consciousness system that absorbed all of this knowledge and information to further myself down my own mythological rabbit whole? It’s pointless.

To me this is a bit ‘late’ to realize in my process with such clarity, but better later than ever breaking through yet another ‘layer’ within the experiences, ideals and fascinations held within me as part of ‘my personality’ created in the image and likeness of the illusion; what I mean by ‘illusion’ are my experiences, my own responses toward certain artists, books, films, arts in general which means, how I FEEL and how I would See myself in relation to ‘what is of this world’ and what ‘suit’ I wore most of the time to be in it. I also see that I can apply this same realization to any other point or aspect in reality toward which I had held some ‘special value’ upon and instead see it  within self-awareness for what it physically is,  realizing that there’s no ‘grandeur’ in anything in this reality at the moment that I could genuinely ‘praise,’ because everything that we’ve ever done as humanity and our ‘culture’ specifically has been engineered within the context of our preprogrammed reality, of revering the mind and system that it is in our outside world – but never life which is what I actually ended up doing for myself: I found ‘my place’ in the world in a comfortable cage where – If I had continued down my ‘preprogrammed path’ – I could not at all have affected real change, because arts as I now see, in order to become really ‘famous’ and revered, you cannot genuinely destabilize the status quo, and so all the people I admired and I believed made some advancements really only landed themselves in jails or ended up as drug addicts, alcoholics, committed suicide or fell for the path of fame and glory as it is still apparently ‘too hard to refuse’ when you can sign a pact with the devil to get everything you want and ‘make it’ in this dog-eat-dog world. We have all become preys of our own emotions, feelings, desires and wants, yet we believe that that is the key to a fulfilling life, to ‘get it all’ when it is in fact that way in which we are imprisoning us all at the moment, disregarding the fact that if I take more for me, I am in fact leaving another without any.

This is a lengthy point to me as I chose to and wanted to become part of culture as a creator of it, so I chose to study a career dubbed as ‘creator of culture’ which is arts, visual arts and for the most part I’ve seen how ‘arts’ in general are being used as the circus to entertain, to further decay, to instill new ‘ideologies’ and ideas with which we most likely end up much worse that we already are doing in our overall human decay we’re living in. This too can be changed and I see this IS the point I can certainly do not only for myself, but for anyone else that’s realizing the same propaganda-role that art has taken throughout our known history of it.

 

So, this is not over yet, it’s only just begun. I would actually challenge and/or suggest to you reading this to look at which character either from a film or book, what artist you idolized or ‘wanted to emulate’ for some reason and why, what kind of ideology from a certain movie or series you could ‘identify’ with and decided to make it your own by becoming/acting/speaking/wanting to look like someone you saw on the TV, a film, a book character, an artist, etc. The more and more we start considering the seemingly subtle ways in which our behavior and what we claimed to be ‘our own personality’ has been influenced by the media and entertainment we participate on a constant basis, the more we will be able to realize to what extent we are STILL accepting and allowing the continuation of the problems in this world by realizing that our current culture is not one of self-support and honoring each other as life, as equals – but instead we are using it to perpetuate and upgrade our own alienation from the matters that should have always been part of our culture, which begins with self-awareness of who we are in ourselves as our mind and How we are contributing to the creation or destruction of our reality with the ways we act, speak, think within our lives and toward others.

 

This will continue …

 

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Are you mind controlled? Test yourself here:


400. How to Best Contribute to Each Other’s Lives?

 

How many times do we actually wake up considering: How am I going to support myself and others today? Well, I bet not as often as we in fact should, yet if we all began applying such starting point for ourselves as part of ‘who we are/what we do’ in our day to day living, we would have an actual genuine revolution from the moment that the benefits of coexisting within such principle would most likely create as a result of it doing just that: a world that is best for everyone.

 

Today I did the usual when going out for walk while going through various grocery stores buying my food and then I went to the place that I’ve been going to lately to get my ‘special recipe’ vegetables and nuts drink. I buy it at a relatively new small restaurant run by a family serving mostly what is called ‘healthy foods.’ I made the decision from the moment I saw it open that I would go there and ask them if I could get my ‘custom made’ juice, which they agreed to, and I simply saw that they were affable and asked them how long they had been running their business etc. the basics to get to know more about them as I kind of knew I would be going there quite often.

It’s cool when you find a place where you can ask for ‘your drink’ being it so that I do not fancy bars or alcohol any longer to have ‘such experience’ but instead I go get my ‘healthy drink’ from there lol here. Throughout this past month when going there I would briefly chit chat the usual here and there about the weather and how their business was doing and some recipes etc. Though today casually just one month after first meeting them, we kind of went through the barrier of just being the customer/service provider relationship so to speak and this happened in a rather casual way, but certainly it was all based on Me taking the decision to just express in a moment.

 

So they usually have their younger kids there and one of the girls had a knot in her hair and not enjoying her mother disentangling it. In that moment I simply expressed to them how that seemed such a ‘past story’ to me since I would also get very big knots at times and how I no longer have to be worrying about that – lol – so it seems that was me opening a door to say ‘more’ than the usual and specially related to me not having hair, they finally felt probably more at ease to ask me about my no-hair style and so yes I explained it was entirely my decision and explained some of the reasons why I do it – comfort, a decision I took in a moment of my life to stand up what’s best for me, for life and to live that support for myself – and obviously the benefit that comes with it when it comes to time, care etc.  So the man/ father then asked me what is it that I did/ what do I dedicate myself to since he and his wife had been curious about me, probably because of the no-hair or who knows but I ended up sharing what I dedicate my self to in terms of being a supporter of human development to integrate living principles that aren’t taught in schools and that are very much required in this world if we really want to change it, while applying them myself and in essence being ‘rattling the cages of the caged’ which I came to understand for a while now that that was the point in my life to be and do as well to instigate for those that can hear to also consider what’s possible in our world-life if we all start considering each other as equals and do to another as we would like to be done onto.

I explained to them how I studied visual arts having an idea of maybe hitting the ‘good life’ and becoming some kind of an artist/star and be able to influence others to ‘change the world,’ but then one year into my career I found this organization and people around the world that completely changed my life and so I had to ask myself what I saw as a priority when it comes to my life, what I wanted to spend my time on: either creating artworks or dedicating myself to my own creation, to straighten/align myself so that I could be and become an example of what genuine change implies in practical manners in this world. I chose the latter, and yes it came with the ‘breakdown’ of myself as my ego, my desires which I absolutely personally took the decision do in my life. And here just for clarification purposes, no I am not saying that ‘to walk this process you need to give up ‘your life’’ or what you desire to do, this is just what I saw was pertinent in my case.

From the moment I encounter the Desteni material it didn’t take long for me to think these exact same words ‘I want to work with them’ and from that moment on I simply applied myself to support with what I could at the time, transcribing material, studying it and getting to read more and more of the forum. I knew I was going to be ‘in it’ for life and so when I came to decide what I wanted to be doing, the decision was easier as I had also realized the starting point of my career pretty much based on the creation of my ego with no real foundation, so I didn’t quit, I walked it through but certainly realizing that my point in this life is to apply myself in this process of self change and be directly a point of support for others, which in this process it means living and applying the words I preach so to speak, being an example that I can see for and within myself I would like others to consider as a possibility and potential that exists within us all – not ‘as me’ but as the process of self-change and its possibilities when applied by each one of us individuals around the world.

I’ve pushed myself to take these points of responsibility throughout time, walking slowly but surely throughout a series of insecurities, denials of my potential, believing that ‘others could do it better’ and that I wasn’t ‘ready enough’ and certainly this is not something you are immediately ‘ready-for,’ it takes time and self-application, consistency, dedication but mostly to remain self-honest within the starting point of supporting others which means: I support others within the realization that in doing this, I am supporting myself too, not to ‘be better than’ but to empower each other equally, which is the first point I see is necessary if we ever truly want to live the actual ‘power for the people.’

So I shared all of this to the couple that runs the natural foods restaurant and so upon this, I usually do say to everyone that asks and is interested in it, that I am here if they would like to ever share something, get some perspectives as ‘that’s my job’ so to speak.And they did, they shared how one of their sons is quite analytical and critical about society, but is growing more and more angry and frustrated for not knowing ‘what to do’ to ‘change the world so to speak.’ And of course, I said I’ve been there, done that myself and so how I am available if they see it would be cool to have a chat with him. I consider that there is nothing more ‘rewarding’ than being able to communicate with other individuals at this level, with such ease, such openness and all of it formed by a series of decisions I made to also frequent buying there as I do truly appreciate the fact that they have decent prices, quality products and are a family running it, not a large corporation having people doing it for them.  I appreciate someone that can make a living by selling and promoting supportive and healthy food to eat than someone earning millions being a corporate manager in Mcmeals Inc., not to diminish them, it’s simply being rather self-aware of the support required in our foods and this business run by the couple/family is the kind of businesses I would like to see more often as well for the betterment of our eating habits too.

Anyways to not make the whole deal long, it was also very interesting how as I started sharing how I not only dedicate myself to this process of supporting myself and others but investigating solutions for the world system as well. So, the guy said how he had been pondering Why does royalty exist? And yes, now we have something to thank for to the abdicated royal in Spain, having people questioning the existence of ‘royals.’ So I shared a bit on the history of that and we continued talking about the corruption in government, the pedophilia that runs in our government – which is quite well known unlike other places – the freemasons, the elite schools, the standardization of education, pop culture, Disney and the indoctrination of little boys and girls into an early sexualization, the disruption of families, parenting, oh yes parenting which is the main point that we discussed and how important it is also to become an example to the children, and how their very own relationship will become the ‘model’ or example for their children to recreate and how every word, every action mattered when it comes to being the example. 

The point that worried them the most is not knowing what to exactly do with one of their sons and I explained how I have walked that road exactly. I was highly, highly critical about the world around me – always looking at everything with disgust, even hatred when it came to the church, politics and every other rich person I saw as a culprit for ‘where we are now.’ In essence, I was always blaming  ‘everyone’ in a position of ‘power’ around me instead of actually realizing I was going to get myself nowhere if I remained in such antagonistic stance. This remained like that until I started realizing the ‘role’ I was playing as in wanting change and wanting to get it done outside of myself – but never really consider it was me that had to become such example myself, within myself first.

The revolutionary thing within Desteni is that we become the actual living proof of what changing your life actually in fact means/implies and ‘looks like’ – obviously not physically but practically speaking of. As I’ve said some other times before, who knows where I would have been right now if I had continued trying to evade my reality and evolving my ego… I am so glad I stopped myself from going literally down that path as I’ve seen in others where it took them and I am certainly in no way regretting the choices I’ve made when they’ve been made in order to support myself. At first it does seem like a ‘big change’ and as these guys said as well, it IS rather difficult to change oneself and also how to live in a society where you have to ‘swim against the tide.’ I explained that certainly at first it was quite a ‘tough time’ but how now it is simply who I am and what I do/live by now and so it’s not any longer something ‘separate’ from me but who I am, it’s become ‘natural’ in a way, which they also confirmed when they explained their perception of myself, including my rather ‘non usual’ look lol. Of course this is not the ‘absolute’ but certainly I do have to be able to recognize that I experience myself mostly stable and that any point that ‘makes me feel uneasy’ it’s just something I cannot stand for that long, I simply start investigating what I did, said, read, didn’t do or felt about something/someone and so see it for what it is. So this means that I no longer can experience myself in a constant ‘state’ or ‘experience’ for that long as I used to before, because now I do direct myself to sort myself out/ to align myself, just because it is so easy to notice when something ‘rocks my waters’ so to speak, and so yes this general stability is what I also see is more of a physical presence that I can then decide to express I an certain manner to interact with others.

I shared with them that a great benefit from this process is how one ‘gains’ stability, recognizes one’s own ability to change, develops ones own potential, breaks through any pre-determined/limited ideas of ‘what I should be and do as I then focus on my own expansion, breaking through the patterns of the past which have gotten us to the point we are living in now: absolute enslavement as there is really no other word to describe it. We’ve always been slaves in fact, but now it’s just less covered by nicely painted facades.

 

One aspect that they mentioned about their son which I also can relate to relate to, is how the ideals of a ‘better life’ are created like for example pondering the American or European living standards as ‘the best’ – this is obviously coming from us living in Mexico. I remember this very well too, I used to – believe it or not – also ponder America as this ‘great place’ for some 7 years in my life and dreaming about going there, as well as Germany.  I got rather confused at seeing the evil behind such perceived ‘beauty’ and the kind of ‘art’ that was in fact existent there which was all created based on ideas about power, abuse, gods, reptiles, death and everything that can mean the reverse of life and most likely done by slave-labor work for the ‘less fortunate ones’, so I also then shared how I had to debunk my own ‘ideals’ of what a ‘good life’ currently means and seeing how it was in fact constructed upon, which led me to debunk my delusions of grandeur when it comes to understanding a ‘first world nation’ and instead, being able to understand a ‘first world nation’ in reverse when it comes to measuring this world in self-honesty: the richest are the most abusive, and so I could no longer revere and ‘admire’ any form of royalty, power, exuberance and so-called progress. It’s all been based on abuse so that is there to actually admire there? I certainly got my own understanding on this later in this process when getting to understand the actuality of ‘first world countries’ and the most ‘powerful currencies’ around the world, which I could only then make sense of through this ingrained pattern and program to seek for power, seek for more, seek to dominate and control, just for the sake of the experience thereof. This is the human nature that we have existed as thus far which is the same human nature that can be changed if we actually want to see a change in this world.

What I shared with these guys was in a considerate manner, not just ‘spilling the beans’ for the sake of it, but seeing how much they were also ‘willing’ to hear based on their questions, what they were interested in getting to know about and so we probably talked about over 2 hours which I had never thought of doing and opening points ‘that far’ with people that I do‘not know’ from other relatives or friends of friends type of situation, which is rather cool because this is what we can probably do more often as well, opening up with the people we ‘buy’ things from or that are in our neighborhoods and besides supporting them with spending our money there – instead of buying some crappy food for some Mr. McRich, I rather support local small businesses that sell quality healthy food and earn a decent living by doing their meals with the necessary care that they also eat from.

Now this is what I support as well when it comes to buying that which others also sell with the intention of selling something that is beneficial for ourselves, and it is also nice to be able to now open up with them and see how cool It is to see that they are actually quite ‘open minded’ as well and receptive to living principles which they already have to a certain extent so, I’m glad and more than willing to support others that are open and willing to support themselves too – this is what I am here for, this is what I could say I was ‘born’ to do and it’s a rather rewarding and enjoyable too when I can talk to people at length about this, and being genuinely interested because it is in fact what we can all relate to as well, it is what ‘we do’ as human beings. So there’s really No excuse to not have a topic of conversation with any human being, regardless of them being willing to ‘hear and apply it for themselves’ or not. I’ve realized that my point is not to ‘show others’ but to simply live this for myself and so instead have people then asking opening up as I have made the first move to ‘open up’ until one gets to this point in a conversation of  asking for perspectives or wanting to know ‘what I think about…’ and so through sharing perspectives already being opening further points for others to consider too. In the end they were quite grateful for the chat and it’s these moments that certainly can make a greater impact into each other’s lives.

 

A process I can also share of is the one with my parents who actually are quite supportive of myself and my process, being aware of what I do, what I research about myself, the world system etc. Before I was not able to talk to them for a long time. I treated them as ‘my parents’ and so kept the relationship at distance after having had the typical troubled teenage years of getting to dislike them because of them not approving of my friends/relationships and so gathering a certain amount of resentment to which I then started to ‘rebel against’ never realizing it was all done to myself any ways – which I of course came to realize through walking Mind Constructs.
So after all these years of also getting them used to me calling them by their name, we’ve gotten to  have a cool communication where I can keep seeing and identifying my own experiences toward them, any reactions or such – but mostly I keep looking within myself to see where I can spot my own patterns in them and so whenever I can, assist and support them to to open up and see what is is that might be occupying their
mind
, that is bothering them etc. I have also then been able to learn from them, get to know more about their childhood, how their parents treated them, their own relationships with their parents, their ‘fuckups’ and so forth – I mean it has been quite a healthy process too whereas before I would simply not even talk to them about topics I thought they weren’t interested too. So I also should say that it took a process as well, because the first time I stalked lol ‘talked’ to them about Desteni, my father got so annoyed about me just blurting this information out that he told me he didn’t want to hear anything about it any longer, which I then at such incipient time in my process took it very personal and secluded myself from everyone and everything, something that I recommend Not doing and if I can prevent anyone from doing so, please take it into consideration. We cannot just think that by shutting all our relationships we will ‘walk process better’ – it’s in fact the opposite.

 

So after all these  years I’ve been able to genuinely say ‘I enjoy going out with my parents’ and having them be opening up as well to everything I have to share while also joking about their own reactions and seeing ‘where it comes from’ and identifying each other’s patterns based on how I am in fact ‘their copy’ lol. So, that’s something I have certainly also seen as my point of extending support to others too, who are also the beings that brought me into this world so it is cool to be able to support them back this way, even to the point of getting to talk more about this process with some of their friends, which was also cool and another point of ‘extending the support onto others’ that want to support themselves too.

 

I have also lived by the principle of assisting others the way I would like to be supported. I have been participating in forums, writing, public online discussions, assisting people on a one on one basis within the Desteni I Process where through discussing about this reality we can get to support each other to realize points we hadn’t realized yet, and that’s also what’s so valuable about places like YouTube too, where everyone can publish anything as a statement of ‘this is my contribution to the world’ – I am  thankful for everyone that has made videos, documentaries, vlogs and discussions on points that I have learned from and beginning to apply for myself. Gee, who would I be/would we be without the internet and YouTube?  probably a more intricate evolved model of slaves.

 

Ok, so, I share this day as a glimpse of how through walking this process of self-support one can also open one’s door to share, communicate with others based on the sheer fact of being human beings and speaking the same language in this case. It certainly does create an opening to have people become aware of ways they can support themselves, but it’s not a necessity either. I can speak to people that believe in positive thinking, magic, gods or else and still have a point to communicate about where I simply share my considerations and perspectives about any topic and so through that then open up points that others can decide to further communicate about or not –the point is then not about ‘them hearing’ but me being able to share  with others regardless of ‘their intention’ or else. It’s all about who I am when sharing with others, having the principle before all and have no hidden agendas either  – being frank yet also cautious as to not attack or say something that they can be reactive toward, so measuring my words according to what they also go opening up for themselves.

 

This is then a series of examples that I can tell I have applied to when it comes to the following principle:

 

With taking responsibility for myself, becoming aware of myself – take responsibility and become aware of others in my life, to assist and support them as I am assisting and supporting myself – to give as I would like to receive and do the extra bit every day to see where I can contribute to other’s lives and so my own

 

I can self-honestly say that that ‘extra bit’ every day is not yet fully here as myself, so I do have to see where I can generate more ‘openings’ where I expand and actually establish communication with others, instead of expecting people to just ‘knock on my door’ so to speak.

If all of us did this, we would start seeing how our lives get a new meaning from – as an example but not limited to –  strictly mercantile relationships to actually seeing each other as human beings, for example – and actually considered as a genuine source of change and support. , as it would be then us straightening the very relationships I have toward others.

 

In this case it’s very simple, a certain gratefulness emerges as I have now also ‘offered’ to support them and share with them from ‘what I do’ as they also then provide me a service that I am also quite thankful of based on what they do, how they do it and the care and quality to it. Now imagine how things can be in this world if we all give the best of ourselves to each other – why waiting for freaking ‘holidays’ for spreading some phony idea of ‘love’ and ‘brotherhood’ when  every single day could be a holiday  if we all put in our ‘little grain’ or seed to make our lives be improved for all parties involved. Well, it is not a fantasy to say: things would change for the better, as it can be in fact be done in reality within the seemingly ‘small’ points, but one thing is certain: we cannot fully measure ‘what will emerge’ from these moments, all that we can know is that it is one little step for oneself, but possibly a huge one for man to get to be kind again.

 

So: How to best contribute to each other’s lives? By living the principle of first stabilizing and supporting myself to genuinely be able to say ‘I support you the way I would like to be supported in self honesty’ which means in consideration of you and I being in fact equal and one and aiming to live in a way that is best for all.

 

 

 

Thanks to everyone  at the Farm in South Africa, from where I  learned and got to apply these living principles for the first time among a group of people.

 

Learn more about how to Live by Principle and  become part of the support-structure required in a world that’s going through a massive wake-up call

 

 


399. What is Missing in this World for Real Change?

The Necessity of Living by Principles

Throughout these past 6 and a half years I have embarked myself to understand more about the reality that I live in and that I most certainly was blinded from to be able to understand. Looking back and ‘putting the pieces together’ many of us – if not everyone and some simply don’t like to give ‘much thought’ into it – actually KNOW there is something profoundly wrong or ‘missing’ in our lives and this world. Yes, I also sought answers in some greater purpose, even in some divine and rather metaphysical concepts that I would simply hold on to because it remained as a comfortable lie that I ‘made sense of’ because it was comfortable and really not that challenging either, it was all about waiting and hoping in fact. But, the reality is that this was all the knowledge trap covered at all ‘fronts’ in the reality we live in to not EVER look in the most obvious place, the one that has always been here and that we have blatantly missed while ‘seeking truths’ or ‘seeking ourselves’ out there somewhere else: ourselves.

We are in fact living in a crucial time in our lives where the truth is being revealed behind the Veils to genuinely see the principle that has ruled us all thus far: Evil as the reverse of LIFE. I understand this might be rather an uncomfortable truth but for me it was actually the most supporting thing I could ever do, to be willing to understand that our actual nature as human beings is not that of benevolence, dignity, integrity, solidarity, love or else – and we have the blatant proof of that which is our world which we tend to reduce to a power-hunger game missing out the clue of where it all started in the first place, which is within ourselves, our very nature from which the rest of the world-system as we know it and the way we have enslaved each other to be masters and slaves has in fact emerged from: our own necessity to be controlled and to have such controllers, just because we have abdicated our power all along.

Throughout this process I have worked with – and continue to work on – being able to uncover/dis-cover my true potential that I had sedated and suppressed within personalities, ideas, beliefs of myself of which now I can look back and understand why so many of us still fear to ‘come to the front’ and speak up. Well, for reference of that you can read this blog site you’re on at the moment, I can only briefly say that there’s a massive de-brainwashing to be done in order for us to genuinely start recognizing the Power we all have and yes, ‘power’ as in our ABILITY and CAPACITY to direct ourselves to precisely ‘be the change that we want to see in the world’ which is not a positive-thinking mentality, this IS the Actual Process that it will take for us to genuinely change the foundation of the current ‘world-system’ that we see so ‘far’ from ourselves, not realizing that its very foundation exists/relies and solely exists in the intricacy of every single Though, Emotion and Feeling participation wherein we Allow ourselves to be Governed by the MIND, which is a preprogrammed Consciousness system in which we have only existed as fuzzy-logic survival-mode organic robots from which we have always only learned how to equate our OWN benefit and survival – but never ever learned how to genuinely start consider HOW we affect others with our decisions, our actions, our thoughts.

 

We have beseeched for ‘clues’ for ‘saviors,’ for a ‘good president’ to come and be our MESSiah, well, yes we have gotten ourselves only further down the rabbit hole because we haven’t yet understood one very basic principle: this world wasn’t founded upon the mercy of any god, it is actually ruled by our collective irresponsible ways that have created the reverse of life and as such it is to understand that: Nothing will change unless, I Change, unless We All make a stand and Change within ourselves and so the change in the without will be an outflow of this starting point which is Self-Change.

This is how we bring it all Back to Self and see, ok so what have we been Missing all along? What have we been Dissing all along? Living Principles – look at our culture! It’s plagued with vices, violence, revering death and destruction, consumerism, laziness, apathy, insanity, greed, power, sexual depravity, psychological abuse and the initiation of children to this great Consumerist CULTure wherein we have done everything but learning and fomenting ways of how to Honor ourselves as Living Beings –  that is Nowhere to be found!  not within parental education, in schools, in media, in arts, in politics, in religion, nowhere! Everywhere we have tainted ourselves with the same ILLusions of feelings as benevolence, feeling ‘good’ for doing some charities or believing that to Love Humanity means to ‘wish well’ for everyone, without even realizing why we have had the need to create such words as Love that imply only a fluttering experience in your stomach as a sign that Energy is all that we have in fact become within ourselves and toward another – but not life.

Everywhere I have researched and sought for answers, for a genuine structure of change I only have found further polarized solutions like thinking positively all day and deny ‘all the bad’ in your mind, seeking revenge to ‘the powers that be,’ changing personalities, doing some charity work here and there, be all nice and smiley and hope for better times to come or accept reality ‘as is’…. well, seriously, where are we pretending to get ourselves with that? Nowhere, of course as it’s all based on characters, ideas, self-presentations of ‘who we are’ toward OTHERS and so once again, missing out Who? Ourselves.

We require to have the actual guts and courage to develop some self-honesty along with having a directive structure and understanding of how it is that through one individual making a decision to stand AS and be Consistent and Congruent on the decision to Live by Principles, we become an Actual Revolution in this world, one that has Never existed before because we have always sought ‘solutions’ in the pre-fabricated Hegelian mentality of Thesis-Antithesis and creating the marvelous polarized and prefabricated upgrade of Synthesis. This has been our problem, still thinking within the same MIND-Construct and framework with which we have Created the problems in the same place.

Time to get OUT of the BOX as that’s where the illusion exists, that’s where we are governed by ideas, beliefs, fears, feelings and emotions, history, world-system constructs that we have obediently followed to the T out of fear.

Thinking OUT of the Box implies Living by Principles, doing exactly what you won’t see advertised on the TV, what Isn’t a ‘fashionable trend’ in the media and entertainment,, what would make you feel deeply uncomfortable in the first phases of implementing this as it IS in fact about getting out of our comfort zone, out of the comfort of fears, of resistance to change, or fearing to actually have to step Out of the Box  where we have become obedient slaves and have come to adore as our prison, our own mind – Nothing and no one else but ourselves will cure our Stockholm Syndrome but ourselves.

So, this is why I have decided to walk the process of Living by Principles, where I have come to realize that I must ‘search no further’ for answers, but that the answer exists and resides within me, within the volition to actually become the point of change I sought outside of myself.

Hereby I commit myself to live by the following principles that represent me and many more around the world that have taken this oath to themselves in Equality, as the necessity of recognizing our actual power and so living it for the benefit of everyone in this world and existence, in Equality AS Life.

 

Join us if you agree it’s about time we Think Outside The Box

 

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The Desteni of Living – My Declaration of Principle

1.       Realizing and living my utmost potential

2.       Living by the principle of what is best for all – guiding me in thought, word and deed to always in all ways direct problems to the best possible outcome for all

3.       Living by the principle of self honesty – to ensure I am pure in thought, word and deed: that my within and without is equal and one. Who I am within is who I am without and vice-versa

4.       Self Purification through Writing, Self Forgiveness and Self Application – the action of realizing I am responsible for my own thoughts, words and deeds, to forgive myself for transgressions and change myself to ensure I Take Responsibility for who, what and how I am and through this know that I can trust myself to always be honest with me and so others

5.       Living the principle of Self Responsibility – realizing only I am responsible for what I accept and allow inside of me, my relationships and my outside world and so with this responsibility: only I have the power and ability to change that which I see is compromising who I am, what I live and how this affects others

6.       Realizing that who I am in thought, word and deed affects not only myself – but others as well and so with Self Responsibility in thought, word and deed – I take responsibility for myself and so my relationships to be Self Aware in every moment  and live in such a way that is best for me and so others as well

7.       Living the Principle of Self Awareness – to be aware, to see, to recognize my own thoughts and Mind, to be Self Honest to the extent where I can take responsibility for when I see my thoughts / Mind is not what is best for me / others and commit to immediately take responsibility and change for myself and so for others

8.       With taking responsibility for myself, becoming aware of myself – take responsibility and become aware of others in my life, to assist and support them as I am assisting and supporting myself – to give as I would like to receive and do the extra bit every day to see where I can contribute to other’s lives and so my own

9.       Living the principle of self trust – as I commit myself to remain constant in my living of self honesty, self responsibility and self awareness, I stand as an unbending trust that I always in all ways know who I am no matter what I face and that in this I know, as proven in the constancy of my living that I will always honor and stand by what is best for all and so best for me

10.    Making Love Visible – through me not accepting/allowing anything less than my utmost potential, I support those in my life to reach their utmost potential, to love them as I have shown love to myself by gifting to me my utmost potential, the best life/living experience and show others as I have shown myself what it means to LIVE

11.    No one can save you, save yourself – the realization that the tools and principles of Desteni is the guide, but I must walk the path myself. We are here to assist and support each other in this process from Consciousness to Awareness/LIFE and what it means to live – but the process itself, where you are alone with yourself in your own Mind: is walked alone

12.    Not waiting for anything or anyone to take responsibility for me and this world – but that I realize I have created who and how I am in this moment, therefore I have the responsibility to change who and how I am and so the realization that we as a collective created how and what this world is today and so it is the responsibility of the collective to change how and what this world is today

13.    Honoring the life in each person, animal – everything from the great to the small of Earth, that we expand our awareness and responsibility to creating the best possible life for everyone and everything and so ourselves

14.    Relationships as Agreements: individuals coming together using agreements as a platform to one-on-one expand, grow and develop as individuals in life and living to support/assist each other unconditionally to reach their utmost potential where the agreement is a coming together of individuals understanding what it means to stand as equals and to stand as one

15.    Sex as Self Expression – where sex is an united expression between individuals in honor, respect, consideration and regard of each other as equals, two physical bodies uniting in equality and oneness – a merging of two equals as one physically.

16.    Realizing that by the virtue of me being in this world – my responsibility does not only extend to my own Mind / my own Life, but to the minds and lives of everything and everyone of this earth and so my commitment is to extend this awareness to all of humanity to work together and live together to make this world heaven on earth for ourselves and the generations to come

17.    I must in my thoughts, words and deeds – but most importantly in my Living Actions, become a Living Example for others in my world that is noticeable and visible when it comes to the potential of a person to change themselves and so change their world. So that more people can realize how we can change this world, by standing united in our self change within the principle of what is best for all to bring heaven to earth

18.    I am the change I want to see in me and my world – to bring heaven to earth is to bring into being, into living the LIVING PROOF of a PRACTICAL HEAVEN that can be seen and heard in our actions and words. We are the Living Heaven that must come into creation in this Living World.

19.    Through purifying my thoughts, words and deeds – my inner becomes my outer, so I bring into creation me as heaven into earth, realizing it is not enough to ‘see the change / be the change’ – for change to become REAL it must be a constant, consistent living of me through the words I speak and the actions I live visible and noticeable to all in every moment of breath

20.    Realizing that my physical body is my temple – my physical body is the living flesh through which and in which I will bring into being and create / manifest heaven on earth as me in my thoughts, words and deeds and so I honor, respect and regard – nurture and support my physical body as I would nurture and support me as equals: my body is me

21.    We are the change in ourselves and this world we have been waiting for: and so I commit to dedicate myself and my life for each one as all to realize this, as nothing will change if we don’t change in all that we are, within and without

22.    The realization that for me to be able to change myself in thought, word and deed to the most effective living being that I can be and become – I first have to ‘know thyself’ and so commit myself to investigate, introspect and understand how I became who I am today, to prepare the road before me into self creation of a responsible, aware, self honest and trustworthy person for myself and so for all

23.    The realization that for me to be able to contribute to change in this world – I have to get to ‘know thyself’ as this world and so commit myself to research, investigate and introspect the inner and outer workings of this world and align the systems of today to present and give the best possible life for all on Earth

 

Stop Waiting

 

Investigate who we are as a group of people committed to take responsibility for ourselves and so become the foundation for a new world in Equality.


373. Meeting the Most Evil Man on Earth: Bernard Poolman

Today August 11th, 2013 Bernard Poolman Died and it’s quite the most shocking news you can get on what one would expect to be the most regular Sunday morning on Earth, it wasn’t and I agree with Cerise’s statement My Dad, The Devil: the world is more poor without him.

I must begin with saying that I have never known what to say when people die, and have only attended one single funeral that wasn’t even from a family member but my mother’s best friend and every time I got to know someone was dead I just could not know what to say or if I should ‘feel’ anything – well today I got a more direct experience of that for the first time. I am 26 years old and have never lost anyone as close to me until today yet I wipe the tears and continue to stand because I’ve gotten more than enough support from him to now be where I am standing today: writing the new contract I’ve acquired with life, walking the process to stand equal and one to the words lived by him as the walking living flesh he was, a man that has been hated by people that are willing to abuse and deny the responsibility we have in this world and  deny what is required to be done on Earth, but at the same time revered by all of us that are grateful for every single moment he would share what would be Here to be shared, in the moment – no preparation, no scripts, no nothing –  and to me it was more than an honor to be able to directly collaborate in being the hands that type out what he would so fluently speak out and yes, that will be no more – but the words are still here and now to be lived by each one of us since it is what we are here to be and become: stand equal to the living principle he embodied, that’s what he really was and continues to Be.

Continuing from:

 

When approaching the Desteni Forum for the first time, we got to see posts by ‘Eagle,’ an individual that would post all videos and continually respond to every single post that was made in such a riddled yet clear cut way that only through reading such words it was like opening my brain to a whole new window that I knew it was there, but somehow it was marvelously placed in such directive simple ways that I immediately knew I’d like to someday be able to directly see the points, which was also learned through all of the replies posted on the DesteniProductions Channels (2007-2011). Later on Eagle became Common Sense and as I begun to participate in the Private Forum in march 2008, I can say that I’ve been tremendously assisted by all the chats conducted by Bernard from that time wherein I’ve learned of the miles of words shared by him, Sunette/Dimensions and everyone else that have contributed with as an essential part of walking the Desteni Process: the support we got at the forum until our very last chat with Bernard this week is something that remains as one of the best dynamites a human being can ever detonate within an indoctrinated mind shaped in the image and likeness of a system of self-abuse, only to make space for genuine living foundations based on living principles

 

 

My initial admiration for Bernard as the words/principles he spoke of later on became a realization of how what he embodied as the Principled Living on Earth, wasn’t about something ‘superior’ or ‘special’ but actually simply living by the principles he spoke of, the actions he lived and the relationships he formed that are the genuine examples that we have as a testimony of a new way of living for humanity if we so want to continue living in this world. He said it best: “Self honesty is not nice or beautiful” and this became a key quote for me to continually remind myself that the sugar and spice type of life we had all been taught to seek and follow was always a Lie. I resonated with this very clearly which is why I resonated a lot to the words he spoke of, he was wording out what I had seen but merely allowed to ‘pass by’ and now being aware of this had a definitive cause and direction: to expose the lies, to learn how to Self Forgive and walk an individual process of Integrity, Self Respect, Honor and most importantly getting rid of all the bullshit that usually keeps us busy in the mind – I certainly learned to appreciate myself and stand as the reality of who I really am and conduct my potential. I didn’t have many conversations with him while at the farm other than very specific points to be discussed and somehow I see that I didn’t entirely open myself up back then as I was still tip-toeing around it all, not wanting my stuff to be exposed yet understanding that he could see it all.

“Self honesty is not nice or beautiful” – Bernard Poolman

Such a simple statement  yet absolutely supportive since we tend to create this idea that process is something great, marvelous, that will turn us into these good doers or even worse righteous gods  instantly  when it has nothing to o with that, it is genuinely being willing to actually get to know our demon-self, the truth of ourselves, the reality, the nitty-gritty details that we have all always concealed to learn how to ‘make-up’ with flowery words of love and light, and being ‘good’ and eliciting nice experiences upon other individuals without even realizing to what extent – by keeping these masks – we have continued to keep the current hypocrisy and false-value systems that in no way represent a living principle that life should be. Bernard was the living words of every aspect that required to be said in a world where Life is being sold and Equality is a demonized non-living word. He stood as the living principle of the resolution, the integrity, determination, clarity and discipline required to walk this process that we’ve embarked ourselves in within this Process, this  Journey to Life that involves the dismantling of this world at all levels, even beyond what our minds can conceive in order to establish a new living contract on Earth, a contract that stipulates through our written word the principles, the responsibility and practical steps to actually change the nature of who we have become as individuals in the mind – every single statement written and later on spoken in interviews by Bernard revealed to us a blueprint of the mess we are in as this world system and our individual reality, due to everything that we have accepted and allowed ourselves to become. He was always writing the raw truth about reality and opening up the necessary self-confrontation necessary to realize one single thing: we are all collectively responsible for everything we are, everything we’ve become in this world and this was done without ever inciting violence, vengeance or retaliation against ‘others,’ without going ‘against the system,’ without having to incite to revolt or do anything ‘extremist’ as some haters would love to claim he did, just to discredit a message that actually challenged their current self-interested ways of ‘living’ while neglecting abuse.  Instead Bernard did the absolute opposite, he pointed out something we had been missing all along: in this world we have no enemies other than ourselves, individually, we’ve been screwed by our written words that never have considered life in equality – and this clicked within me as the realization of how blindfolded I  had been to always take a stance of antagonism to portray myself as the ‘good person’ without even investigating if such ‘benevolence’ was in fact real – which it obviously wasn’t but only a self-interested mechanism to keep me on ‘good spirits’ while pointing out the flaws in the world.  We were pushed to question ourselves  if it was in fact the integrity I believed myself to have such as in ‘having nothing to do with the ‘evil’ in the world, without even seeing, realizing an understanding that the very thoughts, pictures, imaginations, intentions, secret desires and future projections stood as the very building blocks of our collective illusion – my empire of dirt was debunked and so I realized how worth-less was it to continue ‘holding on’ to something that had never been in fact an example of what living is all about.

 

So, Marlena was the girl that got to the farm in an intense desire to be just noticed right away, and he noticed it right away ‘You are still trying to get recognition’ and realized the point an committed myself to walk and learn what humbleness is about. I was insecure, hooked on harmful relationships, fearing, not wanting to ‘get out and be seen,’ hiding my face behind hair– literally – not wanting to make much noise in the internet, not wanting people to know about myself and my process, being regulated by a sense of ‘self preservation’ of ‘what I like, who I am’ and being fearing any form of conflict wherein I may lose the approval of people or any other ‘meaningful’ relationship I believed to have in this world – well all of these aspects have been slowly but surely debunked throughout time by living and applying the example that Bernard stood as along with every other person that begun applying the same tools within this process.

I got to know I was just asking for another confirmation of a ‘changed character’ a ‘bettered version of myself’ when that wasn’t in fact what this process is about, and within an attempt to keep things in a ‘nice way’ I realized I was only creating yet another mask to conceal myself within the Idea of ‘Change’ without genuinely understanding I was ‘playing it safe’ – until later.

‹Bernard› remember that all is self
thus–self awareness, self standing

make all the words with self you direct your self to be and live it and in the mind–you make up reasons why not to do what you will–but fear others like family

dare to live for real
and fix reality to be worthy of you and all other beings here
  (2008)

 

Marlen's Visit to the Farm 2009

Where is Bernard in that group pic? Lol! I was laughing so hard because he was the one taking the pic an making us all laugh (July 2009, Desteni Farm – South Africa)

 

I am grateful that I was able to visit the farm in 2009 and stay for a year and meet The Most Evil Man on Earth: Bernard Poolman. When I got at the farm he wasn’t home yet and when he arrived the first words were “You’re already Making Noise!” lol because I was just too happy to be finally there and speaking too much with everyone I had already developed relationships with at the forum and being overtly excited about it all, so I greeted with a big hug and from there on, I was in for the experience of my life, I could have never known how much one can learn from another individual and all the people at the farm walking this process as the support it means in order to understand what Living by Principle in fact means in physical reality.

I probably would have liked to be able to be more open toward him while I was there, I was still wanting to stand somehow ‘in the background’ and not stepping up so much forth as I considered others to be more capable than me and I was still holding onto quite a hierarchized way of thinking that is certainly non existent within me at the moment, since I learned how to plant the seed of self-stability, self-authority, self-will, self-respect, practicing the realization of the importance of the written word in a world consumed by contracts of evil as the reverse of life. I certainly got such resolve within myself while being there and remained cultivating it ever since.

 

At the farm I went through heaven and hell, but the hell must be understood as the necessary as-it-should-be realization that throughout my life I had disregarded essential principles in relation to the ‘who I am’ as ‘my time,’ ‘my preferences,’  ‘wanting to do only what I like/want/feel like doing’ and the consequences that I got to face was the realization of how little was I in fact considering other beings – specially animals in my case – in my reality, but only focusing on this ‘self-enhancement’ without a clear resolve and understanding of what Equality truly means in all practical levels, which lead me to realize coexistence and the equality with all life forms that I had disregarded so far as  a part of everything that is here as myself.

The self that is created is an illusion

 

What I’ve learned from Bernard is a lot more than what I will express in these lines since every single  interaction with him – directly and indirectly –  lead me to strengthen, clarify and expand my understanding of this world, life, the visible and invisible yet verifiable in all ways in terms of observing the nature of this reality as our image and likeness, as the fuckup we all signed ourselves to with ink on the flesh as the self that we sold in the name of experience, of energy. Along with this I was able to develop the ability to recognize the actual abilities, skills and talents that I had doubted I could ever develop. I am grateful for the challenges I was able to take on while being at the farm. Lol, there’s this funny moment where one morning Bernard asked ‘Who wants to take a painting project!?’ and Marlen raises hand right away “Meeee!!” and yes oh boy was it not the kind of ‘painting’ I was expecting but an actual challenge of thick brush and rolling painting an entire building lol, which I managed to do with the help here and there of the other guys, man was I proud of myself and according to that immediate ability to respond and stick to my word of ‘getting it done’ in such an apparent simple task, I was able to realize to what extent I had limited myself by my own thoughts of distrust, of doubt and hesitation to speak – slowly but surely I saw that I had only feared being wrong, saying the ‘bad things,’ wanting to be directed/getting orders instead of actually realizing I could develop the common sense and techniques as I go, and this didn’t only apply to the work done at the farm which was already in itself a challenge but also in relation to the ability to commit oneself to do something and Actually Doing-it.  Such is the nature of the things I learned at the farm, learned Self Will and a determination I had absolutely no Idea I was able to bring forth and establish as myself, as my expression.

 

There’s No doubt that all the points I learned from Bernard and others’ interactions with him enabled me to realize that the actual power we have exists  in and as every single breath, and how we had to let go of fears to stand in order to be visible, to not be fearful or ashamed in any way of what I am doing and this is something continued to be walked every single day as the fear is no longer there, but the resolve is a constant renewal of existential vows, the reason why we’re doing this is because we have kept ourselves waiting for far too long for someone to ‘show us the way,’ and it is only now within this process and having Bernard’s example that a new living nature of humanity became a living possibility for all of us aware of and walking the Desteni process, which is nothing else than applying the tools that Bernard himself used to become what he became: the living word in flesh.

 

 

I’ve described several key moments through my journey in this entire MarlenLife blog of things I learned from him, including the R.I.P God blog wherein I realized the irrelevance of my questions about existence and reality that were based on the same constructs and ideas in separation of myself, detached from any real physical value on Earth.

I was at the Farm when we embarked ourselves in the course that is being now provided as an educational platform of self support for several people that have committed themselves to it: the Desteni I Process – back then the Structural Resonance Alignment (SRA)– and I was one of the first individuals to go through it and have the opportunity to buddy people, learning how to begin trusting my understanding and common sense and placing it into application. I remember also all the times we would have the infamous ‘Interviews from the Farm’ which were usually chats at the lounge are or the veranda with the entire group that was living there where we got some of the greatest lessons one could have ever gotten about the world system, heaven, Earth, the Afterlife, Process, The cure for our Curiosity –  it was like story time with real shocking and real supportive facts that are equally available till this day at the article section http://desteni.org/articles/interviews-from-the-farm   

I will probably always say how 2009-2010 was the greatest year of my life, and a small part of this is depicted in the following video Here as Life

The most supportive thing was when I was able to be called out for the patterns I was existing as and I am being forever thankful for the support Bernard gave me to see that which I had absolutely neglected and refused to see, up to the point where I  walked ‘the death of me’ and assisted myself to more and more grasp what must be done in this process and stand as a point of support for myself and everyone else. The thing is I wasn’t exactly told what to do which was also another point of great support – I took a decision to come back, finish school and continue with my process which has been walked with all the same support we got and continued standing and taking on the point I had resisted the most: the Equal Money System proposal and realized that it was a decision I had made to stand up for something that truly means equalizing the value of Life in this world – along with Bernard’s support we continued to walk all the matrixes of self deception to get back to the point where we have realized no solution on Earth will be possible unless we first focus on the Education of the Human Mind, and this is something I continuously confirmed through and with Bernard every single time which also strengthen the resolution to focus on what we are currently doing: supporting ourselves as we are supporting many others to get past the veils of the mind and be what I have committed myself to be: a Life-Birthing assistant as this is what I received not only from Bernard but Everyone else at Desteni, as the Desteni Group world wide, so we’ll continue to spam the world with common sense and self honesty.

 

 

I had few moments of being with him alone, and our conversations were always very directive lol which is cool in a way because that’s how I got to see that I didn’t have to ‘beat around the bush’ and go straight to the facts, get past the emotional bs and focus on the practical directions.  I must say that I had kept still a veil toward him until the past months where he became more than just a living example but also a buddy, a colleague, someone I could share and laugh with at the nonsense of the world and always bringing it back to a solution – all was clear and a constant confirmation of the common sense learned and developed through living and applying the example that he has provided us all with. I will miss that interaction, but again as the clarity that is here as I write these words, I realize that he exists As the Words we will continue to write, live and stand one and equal to, where “Bernard”ceases to exist as a name and memory only and becomes part of who we are as the words we live, standing as an example and living expression that we decided to take on from him and expand through, walking through the systems until we all realize our actual potential and live it out, because that’s what he was able to see within every single individual that had the decision to walk this process of self support. Yes never in my life had I lived with such unconditional beings at the farm and him being the example of what it is to support another the way we would like to be supported ourselves, not expecting anything in return other than the ability to stand on our own two feet, standing side by side as who he is. 

 

I had great laughs with him as well, I particularly enjoyed all the moments of laughter because he had this great sense of humor, lol everyone should have been able to listen to his characterization of the American accent or when he would approach beings at the gas station, the supermarket and ask them about god and money and what would they prefer to keep if they had the option – lol! But I also got to witness first hand the actual physical process he was going through, I witnessed the amount of pain he would endure on a daily basis due to the systems taken on by him as part of his process. I would become worried about it, I wanted to be a solution to ease his pain and he only said: keep breathing and that is already a cool thing for me – and so I will continue until the last one I give  myself. He explained to me how that was his point in process and how I would do the same in his shoes – I said Yes, and continue to confirm I stand within the resolution and self will I learned from him, a genuine example of what it is to stand by principle, doing all that he could, no matter what and never make a big fuzz about it, but learn how to breathe through it, within the understanding of what must be done here in this world.

 

 

malls the churches of capitalism

 

I learned how to  stand up to my own self-abuse, to  slowly but surely get past the trivial aspects that I had held myself a victim toward or apathetic about and be able to integrate living principles that are absolutely non existent in a reality where we abuse life in the name of power as money, in a world where a single value system has become our image and likeness of desires, wants, needs and imaginations that only benefit ourselves, disregarding the consideration of how the abuse on Earth is not built only through/due to money, but the relationships, the contracts, the profiles, the pictures we’ve created within our reality.

 

I learned what Equality means in physical practical terms, what the equation of 1+1=2 meant and I can now laugh a a bit at myself when we were discussing the Equal Money System back in 2009 and I remember asking him: but what will be the value of money then? And he simply said: Life. Eureka! a whole new world was able to be realized just because it revealed to me what kind of religion our political, economic an political systems had become. I also learned how to give myself direction and take on greater responsibilities within the group, which is something I had held myself back from doing just because of those initial fears and seeing the points as separate from me – yet when realizing the principles required for it, one can certainly develop this resolve as we go integrating the living principles necessary to establish self-trust and be able to genuinely begin living without the constant desire to ‘return to my safe cave’ and ‘forget about this ever happening’ – such point cannot exist when one realizes the extent of the problem we’re facing in this world and existence and the responsibility we hold toward every single word, every single screwed up relationship we’ve established as the reverse of Life and how we must stand up to genuinely correct the damage we’ve done to ourselves and every other living particle we’ve taken for granted as part of ourselves.

My resolve to this process is to establish the living principles he stood as the way I have been walking for the past 5 years, of course I require to strengthen my ability to see beyond the ‘downfalls’ when we see there is no way out, because we both agreed that there is always a way out and that is how one can always see solutions where I once only saw gloom and doom, death and destruction.

 

After these years of having walked the placement and development of economic, political and social systems applying the principles he shared with us, I realize the importance of first beginning to establish a living common sensical understanding and application of all of these principles and actually living them, embodying them as the way we relate to ourselves, to one another,  and stand as that pillar of support to others to o the same because I can see that we require each other to make this work and this is how more than this being about Bernard is about the living principles of self integrity, honor, self respect that we will continue to live and apply toward one another, being grateful for the existence of human beings around the world that as myself are able to Hear his words and commit ourselves to be the examples that this world has yet to realize we are all able to be and become, when we start honoring life and ensuring that we live the words and walk the way forward.

 

Thank you Bernard! I will be forever grateful but more than that, we got to now stand as the principles you left and not be a only a follower – we’re ready and capable of this. Let’s do it!

 

Bernard’s blog:
Creation’s Journey To Life

 

Also check out:

Bernard Poolman’s Quotes

 

 

Matis, Bernard Poolman

Mantis on Bernard’s hand (2009)

Support for Destonians:

 

And don’t forget to watch Bernard’s favorite besides Coffee: The Century of the Self

 

What now?

 

Ready to Become a Destonian and start Walking your Journey to Life?

Here’s How:

1) Make the Decision to Take Responsibility for yourself and stand up for Life in Equality – start Writing Yourself to Freedom, open up a blog and make a commitment to Walk the 7 year Journey to Life and share others’ blogs as well

https://www.facebook.com/groups/journeytolife/

2) Join the Desteni Lite Free Course to walk step by step the tools of Writing, Self Forgiveness, Self Honesty and becoming the Living Solution for this World.

http://lite.desteniiprocess.com/

3) Join the Desteni Forum: participate in discussions, ask questions and post your own blogs in the 7 Year Journey to Life thread, Let yourself be Known for your Commitment to Stand up for Life

http://forum.desteni.org/

7 Year Journey to Life Walkers: http://forum.desteni.org/viewforum.php?f=75&sid=361564addd09c47738ca69f5f9da4e82

4) Support the Living Income Guaranteed Proposal – Visit basicincome.me for regular updates and participate in the discussions on the site

http://basicincome.me/

http://basicincome.me/discuss

http://www.youtube.com/biguaranteed

5) Support Desteni and Yourself through investing in Educational and Self Supportive Material at Eqafe.com

https://eqafe.com/ and Hear all the Free Stuff here:

https://eqafe.com/free

6) Read, Subscribe to and Share Destonian’s blogs, vlogs and the Desteni Material on Social Media Sites

Give to the same Support to others as have been Given to You – Spread the Living Word wherever you can

http://destonians.com/

https://www.facebook.com/groups/2403779056/

7) Commit yourself to this Process Realizing that You are not only Walking for Yourself but to bring about a World that we all want to Live in. Share your process in videos YouTube for greater Impact and Support

 

Thank you all for reading and walking with, let’s continue honoring each other.


Day 6- Shame upon Separation

First of all, the extent to which I am realizing more and more everyday how we have separated ourselves from Ourselves as Life here has often pulled out reactions within me, which means that I have to first establish a point of clarity when realizing that: what is done is done, and cannot be ‘reversed’ as in going back in time and having decided not to manifest the consequences that are here as ourselves and this world.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience guilt, remorse and regret when realizing the extent to which we have literally mindfucked ourselves into an absolute oblivion in separation of life, and how we have evolved in complicating and double-layering our relationships of the mind as ‘who we are. ‘


I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to experience helplessness when realizing that this all could have been ‘stopped’ at some point if we could have realized the equality and oneness that has always been here.  I realize that at this moment such ‘longing for the past’ is simply irrelevant – what I can do continuing learning and educating myself about how I have come to be what I currently am, to establish the certainty of who I am and within that certainty, live it and structure my life according to it,  making sure this time that I do not ever recreate what we have already done as our past as the manifested consequence that is here.


When and as I see myself listening to the explanations of the extent of separation and find myself reacting in regret, guilt, shame, helplessness – I stop and I breathe – I realize that I am in no way making any difference by compounding any form of energetic experience toward it – it’s the other way around: I hear, I see, I realize, I understand and I take myself as the necessary point that requires to be educated on how this creation came to be what it is now, as it is my creation that I must take Self Responsibility from here on.


This implies that any inkling of remorse, guilt, shame and any iota of emotional ‘movement’/ experience toward what I hear, I am able to direct as a point of immediate understanding on what requires to be done, instead of continuing any participation in the mind as emotions of guilt, remorse, shame and helplessness toward myself and this world.


I am instead grateful for being able to educate myself this time on the workings of existence and my participation in it, so that I can see in my face that which I have accepted and allowed myself to be and become, in separation of everything and all.


It is unacceptable to continue creating further friction and experiences within myself UPON the explanations of how I came to this current experience wherein I am simply able to STOP all judgment toward myself and everyone else as this constant irritation and projected ‘disgust’ toward all of humanity which is only reflecting my own disgust, anger and shame for what I accepted and allowed myself to be and become.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to project blame and anger onto others without taking responsibility for it as my creation, but instead believing that ‘I have the right to be angry’ which became a trademark that I accepted as a statement that I applied for myself.


I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to feel shame for having disregarded life, without realizing that such shame is still self-interest as it is a mind-generated experience wherein I am only considering ‘my experience’ toward the realizations that are here for me to face.


Thus I stop all self-interested generated experience when and while listening to interviews and the explanation upon our own self-accepted and allowed enslavement as separation from life, to see and realize that I did this to myself and that whatever comes up within my own mind, I must take self responsibility for. I cannot, in any way whatsoever, continue creating experiences UPON that which should be taken as facts, as manifested consequence that do no require my emotional input onto it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create an inner experience of bewilderment when realizing, seeing and understanding the extent to which I have separated myself from everything that is here, and within this, creating the experience of being actually a tiny-bit, a spec of nothingness which is a reverse form of ego to believe that I cannot ‘do this’ because I am ‘too little’ to do something about this reality and existence, without realizing that I am proving to myself that it is possible to start integrating myself as a physical body and stop any reactions to knowledge and information which is only reacting to myself, as my creation, as the knowledge and information that I have made up as ‘more’ than myself.


I realize that when and as I allow myself to stop being defined by knowledge and information, an opportunity to expands and break the patterns here.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to diminish myself through words that indicate an energetic experience such as shame, guilt, remorse and keeping a grudge toward myself for having accepted and allowed it, which makes no sense! There is no point in now reacting to what I’m seeing and realizing now. I am in fact grateful that I can be aware of this all now, and the only point that is left is for me to commit myself to live a LIFE wherein self-creation is existing in the consideration of All beings, all existence as who I am here equal and one.


I realize that’s a ‘big statement’ but I realize that without having this particular holistic perspective, I tend to lose ‘sight’ at the moment upon what it is that I am in fact walking here, which stems directly from the eqafe interviews. This is then what I integrate as a precondition to all my actions, words and deeds wherein I make sure that I stand as an example of what is possible to be and become when living words that are here to support myself and all as life in equality.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge my statement as ‘too elevated’ – when In Fact I realize that I had lived a life of diminishing myself ‘on purpose’ to stick to a ‘normalcy’ between what I have deemed as mediocrity and the ‘middle way’ as the ‘constant’ that is able to be found within my world as human beings that do not ‘give all,’ but always ‘give the least’ in order to just remain ‘surviving’ in the system.


I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to create myself as a middle-way which certainly has no space in this reality wherein everything must stand absolute – therefore, I stop all diminishment in fear of ‘placing myself in a high expectancy’ which is not so if I am in fact just committing myself to be here in every moment directing my words, thoughts, deeds to create and manifest in my reality that which is best for all – and this is the entire process that I have committed myself to  – thus there cannot be a point of self-doubt in that, as self-doubt can only exist if I want to ‘trust myself’ as Knowledge, which is not the point.


I realize that what I am,who I am here as constancy and consistency of life cannot be diminished, cannot be subjugated unless I allow so by my own caging in a mind frame that thrives on friction as myself, as my words, as that constant state of mind projected onto others to justify my own mediocrity and middle-path life that I have lived.

I see, realize and understand that there are no middle ways in life, there is no way that I can continue half-walking and still allowing me back doors to satisfy my senses. It is that very satisfaction and fleeting moments that have lead myself as this creation to get to the point and extent that we are facing currently.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge my words here as ‘elevated’ without realizing that I am not aiming to anything ‘above’ myself, this is about self-realizing-self to the extent that I had never ever considered could be possibly for myself here, thus I stop any judgment toward the realizations that are within the understanding of the extent of separation I am existing as  and the extent to which we have to establish this principle of living as ‘who I am’ and not something that ‘I have to do’ as a forced act.


I stand as the integrity that realizes that Life Must Be Equal in all ways beginning with myself, and if I am that point that takes this stand, I direct myself to do so in the best way possible that I see and realize I am able to do HERE –


No middle grounds, no dimensional shifts, I stop participating in wanting to ‘skip the pages’ to get to the end, but instead make sure that I go integrating, walking, writing myself, forgiving myself and giving myself proper direction whenever any reaction comes up to the realization of what it is in fact that I am walking as this process here.


There’s no time to fuck around any longer – that’s done and any remorse for having abdicated my writing in the past, I forgive myself for it and make sure that I do not ever go back into the same cycles of apathy toward writing and scripting myself as I see and realize this is Not a matter of preference, but a matter of principle wherein what must be done is not even a decision I can ‘make for myself’ if I understand and realize that it is the law of my being, the law that I have violated in the most atrocious ways possible.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react to the word ‘violated’ within a sense of absolute guilt and remorse when realizing the extent to which we have raped life – I recognize that I am the rapist, the abuser, the violator, the corruptor of life and that judging myself for it makes no difference. I stop and direct myself to stand and ensure such violation ends HERE in every moment that I am able to remain breathing, stopping all desires, wants and needs that preoccupy my mind and direct myself in the simplicity of breathing to continue first grounding myself as the physical body, which is showing and revealing to me to what extent I had lived as an automated robot, abusing it and creating innumerable rifts within me within the slightest emotional and energetic reaction that I allowed myself to participate in.


I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from my physical body to such an extent that I could not even feel and experience what my thoughts were doing to it and how uncomfortable it is to participate in emotions and feelings as well. It is like a poison like the sugar rush that is also violating the natural stance of my human physical body and forcing it to work in such an over stimulated way that it’s like giving drugs to a horse to race – it is unacceptable.


I commit myself to stop all regret and shame that comes when reading, hearing and realizing what I have done and what I have become as this entire world of separation where life has been sold in the name of our self-interest, separating self-interest from the best interest of all as how it always should have been.


I stop any inkling of disgust toward myself as a human being and toward others as humans beings, as I see, realize and understand that we are all responsible and all together within this, wherein we have the opportunity to finally Create a world that is best for all.


I stop and I breathe in any moment that I see myself going into the least reaction when hearing, realizing and understanding the extent of separation I’ve created toward myself and this world as myself, as my creation.


I allow myself to walk in humbleness within the realization that what is done is done, and I can only commit myself to stand as the solution and walk the correction required to stop this nonsense that I have accepted and allowed myself to become as this entire world and existence wherein I have abdicated life for a mind experience.


I ground myself as the physical that is here certainly pushing me to breathe otherwise, it feels as if I am inert.


M

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