101. Communication Noise

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to never question myself on whether what I am communicating is in fact being understood by the receptor the way that I am ‘intending’ to communicate, without realizing that words as they are currently used/ spoken are ‘open to interpretation’ which implies that everything that we are as our mind, our experiences, beliefs, perceptions, preferences and imagination exists/ acts/ performs in a different manner within each individual – hence I realize that in order for me to be able to communicate in reality with others, I first have to walk my own process of self-communication wherein I purify words in order to establish a common sensical/ self-supportive meaning to words that enables each word to become a directive principle and self-corrective statement in itself, as it is only through purifying/ clearing up the meaning of a word based on experiences and past considerations that we can in fact stand  – for the first time – as one and equal through/as the words we speak.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to engage in conversations wherein I never questioned the ability to be understood – hence developed a judgment based on perceiving and believing that others were ‘misunderstanding me’ which creates unnecessary separation/ division according to what we agree/ disagree with, without having taken into consideration dissecting the very words that were used in order to investigate how can we practically equalize the meaning of words to establish a proper communication, which is how and why through participating in conversations wherein words are only used to express the ‘who I am’ as my mind/ communicating to others that are also replying/ participating as the ‘who they are’ in their minds, the only thing we are co-creating in that moment is further separation as the interaction of characters creating a character-like conversation that in no way represent an actual expression of self equal and one here as who we really are. This is able to be spotted the moment that we comply to each other in order to continue talking/ participating in a conversation and go interpreting/ assuming ‘what words mean,’ which clearly leads to the creation of relationships based on preferences, similar mind-connections as personalities supporting each other to remain as mind characters –

Thus I realize that in order to be able to communicate, there’s a process to walk first and that is self-communication to establish self’s equality and oneness with and as words.

 

This is a process that begins with myself, taking responsibility to first walk through the redefinition of the words I speak and ensuring that when and as I am communicating with another, I go verifying that the other person is understanding what I mean based on the premise of me being communicating from the starting point of establishing an equal and one point of communication,which implies that I must first walk my own mind, my beliefs, ideas, perceptions, judgments in order to start establishing self-honesty as myself, as the words I speak and live, so that I become in fact an ‘agent of change’ in terms of creating and establishing a point of communication in self honesty, not allowing myself to communicate from a ‘character’ perspective, but instead express myself as words that will support another being to become aware of the words we speak, how to structure a message in a way that it is clearly understood and also establishing communication form the starting point of self-expansion and self-support , so that any character possession is called out immediately, exposed, walked through self-forgiveness and as such, become the living practical change that is required in order to stop all ‘mind interference’/ misinterpretation as the ‘open for interpretation’ type of communication noise.

And within/ as this, establish agreements/ relationships between one another wherein our words are understood as clear as water, wherein no hidden intentions as secret mind are kept, as this is the way we can once again begin to establish trust between one another: ensuring that we live the words we speak, ensuring that we are in fact constant and consistent in the process of sharing/ communicating the reality of ourselves and no more the characters that we had ‘given our life to’ in a literal manner, as each character takes ‘the best of ourselves’ as consuming the very life essence that we have neglected every time that we suit words to perfect a character and not life.

 

Psychological noise

Psychological noise results from preconceived notions we bring to conversations, such as racial stereotypes, reputations, biases, and assumptions. When we come into a conversation with ideas about what the other person is going to say and why, we can easily become blinded to their original message. Most of the time psychological noise is impossible to free ourselves from, and we must simply strive to recognize that it exists and take those distractions into account when we converse with others.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to load a character when and as communicating to another being based on how I perceive them to be according to embodying a particular race, gender and sex, language, image presentation wherein I realize that I have communicated myself based on the images and preconceived ideas I have in my mind with regards to another being as the configurations/ stereotypes that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist as and project onto others, which becomes a definitive noise that does not allow unconditional self-expression here as the words in equality toward one another.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to communicate with another in a specific limited manner whenever I have a preconceived idea of ‘who the being is’ in relation to the ‘reputation’ that they have, which is nothing else but the generalized conception we create and built about ourselves/others as their ‘idea of self’ that is used in order to categorize and value beings according to how people ‘see them’ based on judgments that are created for comparative and superlative means, which implies that we assume ‘who the being is’ just by the way they look, the past they ‘hold’ as the idea of self that is sustained by intangible memories in the mind, the way they interact with others and their choice of words which I have then taken on as a way to establish ‘who I am’ toward the being in communication based on self-interest, as there can only exist a point of self-interest/ self defense to either enable an open communication or not at any given moment.

 

I see, realize and understand that within sticking to the physical reality, all that I am practically able to see and verify is that I am speaking toward another human being that I am able to hear through my ears and decode a message from. Thus I stick to hearing to the words in the moment instead of creating an expectation toward ‘who the being is’ as a pre-text to hold a prejudice toward the point of communication with another.

 

I see, realize and understand that sectarianism and elitism based on the idea I’ve held of ‘who the being is’ exists in every moment that I am faced to communicate with a being wherein I load their picture, their reputation, their mannerisms, an entire history triggered by their image presentation as a way to assess ‘who/how I will be’ communicating with/ toward them, which implies that I am limiting my expression toward another based on the beliefs, ideas and perceptions that I create of someone in my mind, which are the cages/ prefab forms/ cookie cutter  stereotypes that we use to define one another as a character with specific interests, preferences and ‘ways of being’ – which is in essence allowing ourselves as characters to communicate with others through seeing them as characters which is how real actual communication is not existent, but only a a general back and forth forms of complacency and tolerance takes place between one another to keep the characters in place, ensuring that no one ‘provokes’ the other enough to step out of the safe bounds of the idea of self/ character in play.

 

I  forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use the predictability of characters to my perceived/ believed advantage wherein I thought that because of ‘how predictable others are,’ I am in fact a superior character that is able to then use such characterization to my benefit wherein I know how to ‘treat them’ to agree with me, which is wanting them to agree with the character that I have accepted and allowed myself to be/become as well – thus I see how communication becomes an application of myself as a character that I have adjusted to according to the beings I will be talking to, wherein I would transform myself as the character that can speak words and present myself in a specific way as to facilitate the relationship with specific characters, just because of realizing how relationships can only exist between similar characters and as such, realizing that I could only  be and become an effective ‘social being’ if I was able to equalize myself to the characters I wanted to get along with – which means that I suppressed my expression in order to make it fit a particular characterization in means of being accepted by others/ socializing with others to establish relationships that I believed were ‘real,’ never wanting to see that I had in fact only suited myself to be part of such relationships just because of the value/ worth I had given to such characters in the first place as ‘more’ than me – thus

 

I realize that unconditional communication can only exist whenever I hold no reputation of another/ nor do I seek to become a specific character perceived as ‘more than myself’ in order to satisfy a point of self-interest. I realize that what is real  is the ability to express ourselves as the reality we are existing-as in the moment – this means that communication in itself is not to be seen as a way to ‘comply’ to each other’s characters, but to be and become the example of how it is possible to establish communication with another being based on common sense and not character-agreements wherein we tip-toe around anything that is self honest as that would break the bubble, the illusion of self that is kept as a silent agreement between one another, as we are all in fact aware of how our ego/ personality/ idea of self is ‘our precious’ that we fear letting go of, simply because of realizing that when and as we step out of character = the truth of ourselves is exposed  – and within this, the inevitable realization of self-responsibility steps forth IF the being is willing to stand in self honesty and let go of the masquerade/ character played toward self and others in means of communication/ establishing relationships that actually stand in equality and oneness to assist and support ourselves to actually live.

 

When and as I see myself complying to the character of another being in order to keep our bubbles/ characters in place  – I stop and I breathe – I realize that I have to be and become the example of what it is to be here,speaking, sharing and communicating in self honesty which means: I breathe and I allow myself to share who I am in that moment, the practical realizations I’ve had in relation to a particular point and how I have supported myself to practically step out of character, as I see and realize that this is the type of communication that is in fact beneficial for any being= how to support ourselves/ how to step out of character and realize who we really are and what can be possible if we all do this, as it is the characterization that we have accepted and allowed ourselves to be and become the detrimental aspect that we have kept ‘intact’ because of not wanting to ‘touch on sensitive parts’ within the illusion of respecting one another while/ during communication, without realizing that respect in such situations is nothing else but keeping our characters/ masquerades intact/ untouched due to each one knowing and realizing that the moment that we expose our characters for what they are, we cannot keep hiding the truth of ourselves behind it.

 

Thus I assist and support myself to be self-honest within and toward myself to in every moment that I am communicating with another, ensuring that I am clear as in being communicating in common sense = considering what is self-supportive/ best for all and stopping myself from going into character-play outs in means of establishing a relationship with another being as a character and not as an equal and one being that I can relate-to by the mere fact of being able to talk and reciprocate each other through using words that make us feel good/ important or special – all self deception must be called out if self-honesty is here to be established between two or more beings in self-honesty.

 

I realize that any idea of me having to ‘have something in common’ with another being in order to communicate is simply a prejudice that must be understood as a limitation that we have accepted and allowed ourselves to be and become, simply because of actually fearing breaking the point of specialness that we hold toward ourselves as our characters and within that, fearing realizing that everything we had previously perceived ourselves to be a in being more special than/ unique and ‘authentic’ as a character is debunked within the realization that we are human beings that are equal in all ways, including the mechanisms each one of us use to cover up our reality here in self-honesty through characterization.

 

When and as I see myself ‘choosing my words’ based on who I believe the other person is – such as level of education, race, gender, nationality, social stratus – I stop and I breathe. I realize that I had allowed myself to be and become pliable/malleable and morph myself into various characters in order to be accepted/ ‘have it easy’ to communicate with different characters – wherein instead of having placed the example of not standing in/as self-deception in terms of characterization and actually supporting myself and others to set the tone of communication in self honesty – one has to pave the way.

 

I realize that we have an inherent ability to communicate with one another by the mere fact of being human beings, yet I had accepted and allowed myself to conform/ morph myself according to event/ situation / moment and ‘who the person is’ as a character, wherein I then gave up self-honesty to mimic the same coping-mechanisms as ‘communication’ in an attempt to be liked/ accepted by another in such attempts of communication in order to  get a positive experience out of the idea of ‘having communicated with another’ but in fact, it was only me rubbing the communication the right way according to the characters I would identify the being was ‘playing out,’ wherein I would suit my expression to be ‘like them’ and as such, be ‘liked by them,’ ensuring only the perpetuation of characters as ‘who we are’ instead of being the example and placing the starting point of an equal and one self-communication that is in fact self-supportive for both/ all parties involved.

 

“Most of the time psychological noise is impossible to free ourselves from, and we must simply strive to recognize that it exists and take those distractions into account when we converse with others.”

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to ever believe that it would be impossible to free ourselves from the cages that we have created and manifested toward one another as the characterization we have accepted and allowed ourselves to be and become, according communication with one another based on each one being a character with a set of beliefs, ideas, perceptions about themselves/ reality that I had to apparently ‘respect’ and ‘beat around the bush’ whenever it came to communicate about something that could possibly lead them to realize that they were playing a character, because that would imply that I would also have to step out of character and in this reality, because of how we have only defined ourselves to be only ‘characters’ = we feared losing that which we believe is ‘all we are,’ without realizing that stepping out of character is the first point of self-correction that must be understood in order to ensure that we are willing to let go of the illusion of self that we have wrought as words, pictures, images, memories based on who and what we ‘wanted to be/ become’ toward others in our environment/ reality, which means that everything we have ever believed ourselves to be becomes the words that we communicate, which is how no communication has ever been real as we have never been real with and toward ourselves in the first place.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to ever believe that I had to ‘tolerate’ such character differences when and as communicating with others, wherein I tacitly agreed to keep myself as ‘my character’ that would have problems and / or ‘strive’ to communicate effectively toward other characters, without realizing that it is in this very self-belief that I caged myself and others to remain within the same characterization that prevents the reality of ourselves from being expressed and exposed, to realize and recognize to what extent we have become complacent and obliged ourselves to ‘follow through’ with the lies we created ourselves as and how we have threatened each other to keep our characters intact, wherein the moment one dares to step out of character = attack ensues, as one character stepping out of line will inevitably force the other characters to evaluate themselves and reconsider ‘who they are’ as well – thus, it is to see and realize how we require to be the example of how it is absolutely possible to establish equal and one communication with others once that we have established such self-communication as ourselves, developing self honesty to ensure that the words we express as ourselves are in fact standing in an equal and one self-agreement of what we are willing ourselves to be/ become: living beings that are here to equalize a reality that has never existed In/as equality in fact.  Thus I see and realize the task at hand and the work that comes when understanding that the key to change this reality exists within us, as the very words that we speak – as words are the foundation of how we have built our current world system.

 

This implies that in order to establish an equal and one communication, an equal and one understanding is required. This is thus established through each one of us participants of the creation of/as the new world, committing ourselves to walk our individual processes of writing, applying self-forgiveness to develop self-honesty and walk the necessary self-correction to ensure that from here on, we become the living example of what ‘change’ as an actual process is implied, as it is not only a change of attitude or perspective toward one another – but it implies an entire process of education wherein we finally get to understand who we are within the ‘greater picture’ as a reality that is no greater than ourselves, as we are in fact one and equal to all that is here.

 

A word in separation of self became the cell that we ostracized ourselves in, forgetting that we were in fact living cells of one single body that cannot function properly unless all parts are intercommunicated through a set of systems that ensure life is able to thrive within the organism.

 

Thus I see and realize that it is within the understanding of who and what I am as a living cell within this living body that must take responsibility to establish proper communication to realize the interdependence we hold to one another as all cells that conform the body that is currently facing the cancer of greed and individualism as the religion of self. Proper communication means proper functioning of the organism, means  establishing the responsibility to each part which will ensure a proper conduction of the flow of blood to irrigate the body with a new understanding: Equality as Life is the only way we can thrive – the healing process comes when we understand how we manifested the illness.

 

What are systems in our body but structures and manifestations that enable the interconnection of one single body as one organism, signals are sent from one part of the body to another in order to function properly = there Is Self-Communication existing in/ as our physical body – the question is: why haven’t we considered this basic living-principle and externalized it in an equal manner as the relationships established with one another?

 

We now understand that the principle of Equality implies as within= so without. Who I am as words must reveal the points that I must correct as me for me to finally be real and here – this thus implies that who I am willing to testify myself-as is my responsibility as the words hold the key to self-creation – and I understand that in order to make the body function as one, communication as words expressed in self honesty and common sense are the key to create a new way to walk the current consequences of our primordial separation that has gotten to the current state we are in as this world = our reality, as whatever we have created as separation holds a point of self deception that must be brought back to life through understanding how we created and manifested the point that enabled separation.

 

This is how our mind is a tool as it shows and reveals that which we have separated ourselves from = my mind holds the key that must be equalized in order to step into the reality of me here, that’s always been here – yet separated from my very awareness as I had only intellectualized reality, communicated through words that would make myself/ others more or less than self here when in fact: who we are is equal and one – hence words that support this realization is the new declaration of life that must be brought to application one by one, word by word, correction by correction until it is done.

 

Instead of defining conversation as the coming and going of character scripts, I commit myself to establish a universation  wherein the words I speak are equal and one as the expression of ourselves in Equality as Life; where the con is no more a fixed Version of the character that is not standing as equal and one – it is within this realization that life will be born in the physical as we take back our point of authority for once and for all, the authority that was lost from the moment we were born from the darkness into the light.

 

Time to wake up – clock is ticking and words await to be lived.

 

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1oo. Communication

We write to share ourselves as the realizations we go walking day by day, moment by moment as we walk the process to be and become the living word, the expression of who and what we are as one and equals.

Within this, we understand the importance of words and how one single misunderstanding can lead to wars  – literally – just because we had never taken the task in itself to redefine words, to ensure that each one is in fact having an equal and one understanding of the words we speak.

We have been living thus in a schizophrenic world because: we had never in fact lived the words we speak, we never questioned the existence of words that in no way support life but only sounded ‘powerful’ in separation of myself. We never bothered to ask ourselves how it is that through the words we speak, we have constructed, built and apparently ‘evolved’ in a world-system that is clearly sustained by the same flawed nature of our language based on illusions – and not upon the physical reality.

 

Communication is sharing the expression of who we realize we are as one and equal in order to expand ourselves within the realization that whatever we say/ do and live by in this world, pertains to every single being in an equal manner. Communication is the interaction between two or more beings directed to establish a point of understanding about ourselves, our reality and as such, direct ourselves to be and become an actual equal and one expression of/ as who we really are – pointing out/ making a point of separation evident within walking and living the correction necessary as words themselves.

 

Vocabulary  works just like our monetary system – it is words that became the key holders of separation: each word is  a packaged division / definition awaiting to be redefined and aligned in a way that is best for all.

 

Hence in order to communicate effectively with others, I begin with myself.

We had never taken the very first consideration of equalizing the meaning of the words in a way that is best for all, so that no matter who speaks the word: the word is understood as an expression of who self is/ exists as in and as equals.

 

100 days of sharing on a daily basis – cool. I can only say that I’ve been learning how to communicate and correct my expression through my participation in the Desteni I Process , within the interaction and living realization of what words imply when lived as a point of self-correction, which then make of words actual parts of reality as ourselves, and no longer having words with no life-value position, which makes them irrelevant to even consider when realizing who we go creating a world that is best for all as we walk.

I commit myself to walk this process of redefining ‘who I am’ as words until it is done, which means that I can practically live day by day communicating with myself as the process of understanding, self-correction and self-realization that are always HERE as ourselves, the moment we allow ourselves to walk the process of redefining, clearing the memories and experiences attached towards another part of yourself is  then learning how to live the word as one and equal to, eventually, fully embody each word we speak as ourselves.

 

And this will continue…

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96. Words that maketh murder

The moment we value knowledge and information and its expression as more than ourselves, we are enslaving ourselves even further from what we have accepted and allowed as separation existing in the form of language itself.

 

One of the points I had valued as ‘more than myself’ is the ability people have to express themselves, within that comparing my own ability to express toward others, without ever really stopping for a moment to realize: how can I praise an ‘ornamented’ way of writing without looking at the actual content thereof? Meaning, what do the words in fact mean? which is what is relevant at all times when working with words, it’s not about ‘sounding good’ and such ability will certainly be an inherent process related to being able to express words as self-here –

 

Therefore, it’s plain to see how we tend to glorify, for example, these ‘great writers’ that in essence paint a perfect picture that we complete in our minds and as such, end up believing that they are ‘valuable/ worthy’ for the quality of pictures we are able to imagine of ourselves in our minds, just for the sake of it. While at the same time, the same words can be sentencing an entire country to remain in perpetual poverty – we cannot dissociate the fact that words as imposed values onto reality is then linked to money itself – as this is about numbers and symbols that we have created relationships toward in separation of who we are as one and equal.

 

The moment that we place value on the point of expression in separation of ourselves = we are being victims of our won beauty schemes toward words. I am speaking obviously form my experience wherein I would ‘fall in love’ with books just because of the nice picture that I could get from reading them – a book worm as an imagination addict that would devour the words in order to remain in my little comfortable bubble of la-la-land. While at the same time, in the same world and reality, words were used to declare war toward an entire nation, words were being used to threaten someone to death, words were used to create a ‘burning memory’ within someone for the rest of their lives, words were being used to sentence someone to die in poverty as laws and regulations that dictate who lives and who dies. Words that maketh murder

 

I am grateful for having the ability to listen the origins of language and, I have been able to ratify that which I had realized about words, only to now realize the importance of redefining our words to a best for all – equal and one consideration at all times of who/ what we are as such words. It is impossible to even try and ‘stop wars’ if the very words that lead to create it are not understood as the very acceptance and allowance of self-separation that leads to such conflicts that eventually become a consequential outflow as wars and chronic conflicts linked to a system that we have accepted and allowed to be ‘more’ than ourselves.

 

Equalizing ourselves as words is a vital point here – more than ever these two interviews that I suggest listening to

• Reptilians – Language: the Sceptre of Creation (Part 1) – Part 70
• Reptilians – Language: the Sceptre of Creation (Part 2) – Part 71

have clarified for myself that point of imposition we have essentially violated ourselves with, words that we have accepted as the way to define a point of obvious abuse, neglect, disregard and condition of separation toward one another wherein we only focused on ‘how we feel’ instead of who we are AS such experience or definition that can be formulated as words – and as such, be able to recognize the ways we have created a ‘world’ in separation of who we are as one an equal.

The very first moment that we accept the association of a part of reality toward a word and we file it in our archive of ‘values’ as meanings/ knowledge and information categorization = mind controlled is exerted. Thus, we have to grasp the importance of the process we are walking here which is essentially facing ourselves as our words, as our sentences, our judgments, our dictation as the dictatorship of what we have accepted and allowed ourselves to be and become as the mind. Unacceptable – this world is the proof of the dictatorship of the zombie-words, the dead-words we have become because of  simply having copied them and ‘lived them out’ in means of survival. Let’s face the truth: we did not know any other way, however that does not mean in any way that there is ‘no other way either,’ and at Desteni we are revealing and proving to ourselves there IS definitely a way to do this. If one man could, we all can.

 

Just by looking at one single word, we can get a glimpse of what we are accepting and allowing ourselves to exist as. It is our decision: do we remain as characters copying characters on flat screens and buying all the accessories to embody the ‘picture perfect HDMI presentation or do we dare to step out of this virtual insanity?

The sanity comes when we stop relating to each other as characters, as pictures, as memories – that’s the ‘real freedom’ and it’s fascinating that freedom is sought ‘outside’ of self when the keys are held by each one to finally heal that in-jury of the past as judges of the whole. The reign is over, it is our duty and responsibility for we cannot possibly remain being enslaved to our own dictation.

 

No wonder the word ‘word’ is almost identical to ‘world’ as each word contains a part of ourselves we have separated ourselves to from the whole = it is our duty to purify our vocabulary and this can only be done through walking the basic process that enables such understanding to be acquired with proper assistance and that’s the Desteni I Process. There is no doubt that we have to do this process with the tools and support that is being provided by and as Desteni – it is the only way that education – the real education – is taking place on Earth.

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  How a Child Learns from the Mother: DAY 96

• Day 94: Light Vs. Dark

• Day 29: International Crime Research – Child Pornography Part 13 – Understanding how words burn an imprint on a being, becoming the reason and way to justify their incursion a  life of abuse.

• Day 62: Anxiety Character Self Forgiveness Statements

This is a continuation to:

Day 61: Anxiety Character

69. Change is in the Meaning of Money

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to realize that changing the monetary system implies a Change in the Meaning/ Signification of the word ‘Money’ itself, wherein the sign is no longer passed on from generation to generation as the medium of exchange in the form of coins, bills and banknotes based on rules and regulations imposed by a minority that Makes the money/ decides How it is distributed/ given and traded, and instead realize that for an actual Social, Political change we require an Economic change wherein we as human beings agree that the ‘balance’ required in money at the moment to stop the Inequality is through Equalizing Money to a physical tangible reality and principle, which is Life in Equality.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that the current implications of the meaning/signification of money in our societies is implying suffering, abuse, power, over consumption, division of classes, greed, envy, comparison, competition, success as a positive quality, survivalism amongst any other form of separation that stems from the basic realization that: not everyone in the world has access to this ‘means of exchange’ as money – which implies that not everyone is able to give/ receive that which is required to live, signifying that we have accepted the ‘money tradition’ as a word/ meaning that is signifying the enslavement of man to an arbitrarily made system that is only benefitting a few, while the majority does not get to see ‘the light’ as money as energy/ power to acquire that which is needed to live. Furthermore, instilling the desire for ‘More’ within those that have the basics to live – middle class – but learn to not be satisfied with the necessary as the glorified ‘example’ of the ‘wealthy’ implies that one can get to have all that power as well, wherein the ‘rich and famous’ become just like a carrot on a stick that keeps everyone circling around/ working/ doing all that is possible in order to someday ‘attain’ that amount of wealth as a synonym of protection, happiness, ultimate satisfaction, and ‘worth’ completely oblivious to the actual abuse that goes on with the mere acceptance of money as a separate meaning from ourselves as Life, which implies by default that abuse is existent in its meaning over Life.

 

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that the basic required shift and change in the meaning of money can be established as a social convention based on the firm-ground and principle of Life in Equality, wherein All can be equally benefited by such change/ shift within the relationship we have with money itself: from a meaning of power that is only achieved through work – for the majority – or inheritance,  to a readily given tool as a means of giving and receiving equal access and distribution of the resources of the Earth that we use for consumption and construction of our society, of which its members must equally stand – one by one – as the understanding of what giving and receiving as Equals means: Equal-Money will be the consequence and outflow of us deciding and agreeing in a New Meaning to Money which can benefit All in an Equal-way, which implies that the relationship between the human and money won’t be that of power, lack, desire/ lust as greed and a constant survivalism to get it, but will become an Equal Living Word as a simple tool to manage resources and ensure everyone is equally supported, by mere virtue of being a living being in this world.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed to perpetuate an unspoken social convention over money as a current means of control of the Earth’s resources distribution, which implies that it is in our absolute power and ability to re-unite again to agree that within the principle of one man, one vote, we can establish a new system that can benefit all beings Equally, wherein those in the elite and those starving are finally equalized by having equal power of acquisition along with the rest of humanity, which will dissolve the eternal class-struggle and avoid the need to ‘take down the power’ by force/ revolutions/ battles/ wars – I see and realize that through giving a New Meaning to Money as an equally give-distributed tool, I can prevent a tumultuous process of shift/ change within the monetary system, as I see and realize that wars, revolutions and coup d’état only separate the individuals within a society further, which is precisely why Equal Money System is the most pacific way in which we can all agree to give to each other as we want to receive the right to Live a dignified living, without resorting to further violence, death, crimes and revolting in spitefulness, but instead recognize our actual Neighborism  if we agree to Live as Equals.

 

I realize that the responsibility for how money currently exists resides in each and every single person that has accepted the meaning of ‘money’ as it currently exists in absolute means of separation, division, power and competition, which implies that the solution will also mean a new social convention to give a New Meaning to Money that will imply a process of change through Education, just like learning a New Word and its Meaning, which must be first lived within the individual as the realization of who and what we are as Life is Equal and One = hence, making of money the representation of that realization made a system that is socially agreed upon through democratic means, as the real power that each one hold by virtue of being a participant within society as part of the entire ecosystem as the Earth.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that Equal-Money becomes an imposition as a new meaning to Money-itself, without realizing that fear is only a means of control that have kept us believing that the meaning/ value of money could not be changed/ transformed/ shifted in its functionality, which implies that we cannot fear implementing a Living Principle that is and will benefit All beings equally.

 

I realize that we have kept ourselves living in a generational inertia, never questioning money and its meaning, but simply accepting it ‘as is,’ which implies that it is now that more and more people are being affected and directly influenced by the inequality inherently schemed as Money at the moment, that we start questioning how money was created, when/ how did we accept this, which is the actual imposition and forced-acceptance that we all complied-to by the very first moment that we used money in our lives without further questioning its existence and the ‘rules’ behind it.

 

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that the ‘free choice’ that is implied in the arbitrary meaning of Money at the moment, was not established and promulgated in the best interest of all, but only considering the benefit of those that made the rules of its meaning in the first place, which means that we have followed the ‘tradition’ of such meaning as a ‘word of god’ without really questioning how come we have delegated the same abusive system from generation to generation without pondering the need for a change in its meaning and power over life itself.

 

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that Money is a mere abstraction/ concept, and Not a full sign as a direct meaning of  what Money should be as linked to a physical-tangible object/ part of the physical world – but instead accepting its ‘value’ within the belief of ‘power’ in an abstract form represented by metal, paper, coins with no physical relationship to an actual physicality of/as life itself in this world, but became a meaning to ‘power’ as the ability to simply deny / allow the access of money to other beings, the quantity of it and the rules within which it would function-as, implying that it is Not a meaning/signification that is Real in any way whatsoever, but a socially deliberately ‘flawed’ convention representing the absolute separation of humanity toward the world itself and each other, creating the basis of Inequality by and through a single meaning in separation of ourselves as Equals as Life.

 

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that money in itself as paper, bank notes, plastic, metals cannot in any way be a ‘meaning of power’ in itself, it is the social convention as a Belief-System that we have agreed upon that decides how it works,  which reduces money to a psychological object rather than an actual meaning in function of the physical reality as the tangible resources that can be given/ exchanged with one another – this means that the word ‘wealth’ is the solidification of this intangible ‘power’ above others as a mere social-convention/ belief-system that is only made real through the acceptance of such money having the ability to buy/ consume all that which the value of such money is accepted and allowed to have/‘mean,’ which is, once again, a mere belief-system wherein there are no real values attached to the physical reality, but are all man-made conventions/beliefs. H

Hence, I realize that the problem and solution resides within the ability of us as humanity coming together to create a New Agreement as a New Constitution to declare the value of Money as Life, as a tool to support each other as equals with no ability to generate the illusion of profit/ gain/ power over others as ‘wealth’ any longer.

 

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize how we have conditioned and controlled ourselves through the acceptance of habit and tradition as a pattern followed to perpetuate a system of abuse, wherein we only came to understand the effect of having/ not having money once we experience the detrimental consequences as being poor, middle class or positive consequences as being wealthy/rich as the basic conditioning within a human being’s life, without first asking how it is that such Inequality is able to be accepted as ‘normal’ in our world-system.

 

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that we are all one and equal as part of this physical world – and that money as words became the separators between ourselves as life through the imposition of meaning/ value as worth that can be more or less according to a social convention/ belief-system that was not based upon Life in Equality, which means that we only gave and acquired such meanings through establishing comparison, differentiating one from another as separate entities that could be then assessed as being ‘more’ or ‘less’ than others, which implies an obvious problem of Meaning and Signification within words themselves and Money as a a product of such social conventions/ belief-system in separation of the consideration/ value of ourselves being one and equal as Life. Within this

 

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that the ‘injury’/ split/ incision manifested within this world system as and through Money stems from the very decision of giving words a particular meaning and value within a make-believe system called ‘social convention’ where not every single being was able to vote upon the meaning/ value and worth of words, which implies that the most common sensical way of establishing a new system, a definitive reform in the system stands within the agreement of giving to each other that which is best for all, as the realization that it is only through arbitrarily placed separations as words/ values upon Life itself that we came to create the current system that we are existing as and suffering the consequences of, wherein we have made ourselves subject to our own imposed cages as money upon life itself that is unconditionally given by the Earth as part of who we are in this same Ecosystem.

 

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that the substance of and as Life is here indistinctly, however we have as words and language created separate forms of it as different meanings that acquire ‘different values’ according to the relationships that we form with it.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that value in itself is but a consideration given to things/ people/ the environment in separation of ourselves, which becomes a meaning of worth as more or less than in a fixed-system as a social convention to agree that some things are ‘more’ than others, and in that simple and primordial separation, accepting money as a ‘moreness’ and ‘lack’ at the same time, which is how and why money is a function of abuse.

 

I commit myself to establish the New meaning and signification of Money as the correspondence between the word Money/ Equal-Money to Life itself, as the physicality and substantiality that is here as the Earth’s resources that can be given and obtained in equal agreement and equal availability for All participants within this ecosystem of Earth, which implies that Money in itself has no power other than the ability to be a counting tool to administrate the resources, the provision of services and any other means of giving and receiving in equal terms. This is then establishing the real meaning of Economics as the administration/ management of the house’s resources/Earth’s resources, which is an absolute physical logistical processes and Not schemes to make more profit/ wealth based on unsubstantiated values as abstract meanings Over life itself.

(Read the blog an Economist’s Journey to Life for further support.)

 

I commit myself to equalize the signification and value of Money as one and equal as Life, as the value implying the relationships established between human beings as the social agreement and understanding that we had created a distinction/ separation and differentiation from the one and only real value that is Life itself, which will have to be equally extended to all words, concepts an aspects in our reality wherein we no longer create separation through/ as words that can imply a ‘moreness’ or ‘lesser’ value of things/ people/ the environment itself, but it is all turned into a simple tool to communicate, just as we communicate using words that must be then Equalized as who we are, as actual Living Words that can stand within the new Equal-Money System as the Equal-Value of Life System where the relationships that we establish with one another, can only be interdependent and symbiotic in nature – just like an actual social organism that is able to distribute its resources in an equal way, learning from the functioning of our own physical body that maintains the homeostasis of the organism in place through ensuring that all parts are equally supported with the nutrients required to Live.

 

I commit myself to explain that the difference we agreed to impose upon things and ourselves is a mere linguistic ‘problem’ as meaning/ signification that Must be re-evaluated within the consideration of the current consequences that such ‘flaw’ in the meaning of Money itself and the relationships we have created toward it/ as-it, have manifested a world in absolute separation, where only constant survival and competition is keeping the system alive, as that seeking for ‘more’ as an ideal of fulfillment, without realizing that such fulfillment could be actually readily given at birth by mere virtue of being alive in this world, and that it only takes a social convention and agreement to establish a New Monetary System based upon Life in Equality as the one and only value given to All as the realization of who and what we are as One and Equals as Life.

 

This means that Language in itself will cease to only be a ‘form’ imposed onto life, and instead become an actual Substance as each one of us realize, see and understand the separation that we have created within our world and reality through and as words – wherein we recognize that we are all made of the same substance that is Life itself, and that all words must be equalized as such realization – wherein Living Words implies recognizing the substance of who and what we are as One and equal in every single sound/ word that we express as a constant living-application/ externalization and expression of ourselves as Life.

 

For that, it is an entire process of Re-Education now that we see that the key to change ourselves and our reality exists and resides in the introspection, realization and investigation of who we are as words and how we have to equalize ourselves as such words within the principle of what’s best for all life to Live as Words that are in support of the new meaning and function of Money as Equal-Money = Life in Equality and Oneness.

 

Equal Money System 

Desteni

 

We are a group of people walking a process to redefine words as Life through a process of Self-Correction that entails All Aspects of our lives – where no part is more or less important to review, but equally important as the understanding that this world and reality is the consequential outflow of the separation as words we have ‘lived’ and perpetuated in our lives, and only now being reviewed to see and understand what it takes to Change the World beginning with Ourselves.

Read our blogs: Destonians and Journey to Life blogs 

 

Read the previous entries for the complete exploration of the separation created through and as the word Money

• 
  

  68. Money is a Hegemonic Language

• 67. Money = Function of Abuse

• 66. Holy Fetish: Money as Word of God

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  65. Treacherous System or Original Self-Deception?

 

Blogs that explain the Value/ Relationships created through/ as Money as the separation that exists as an energetic system, which is devaluing substance/life itself into meanings/ words/ relationships between each other that have placed a Cap on life itself.

Creation’s Journey to Life 

• Day 68: Relationship Dynamics – Part 3

• Day 67: Relationship Dynamics – Part 2

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  Day 66: Relationship Dynamics – Part 1
  

Heaven’s Journey to Life 

• 
  

  DAY 1: Who I Am as Money

  DAY 2: The Relationship between Energy and Money

  DAY 3: What does it Really Mean to be ‘Alive’?

  DAY 4: Who I Am as Money – continued

  DAY 5: Who I Am as Money – continued

  DAY 6: Who I Am as Money – continued

  DAY 7: What has ‘Life’ Become?

  DAY 8: How do we Create/Manifest ‘Who we Are’?

 

Bernard Poolman – FAQ Equal Money System – Science and Language

68. Money is a Hegemonic Language

 

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see, realize and understand that Money as a language is elitism, because it is not a language that All beings can equally participate in – this makes Money a language that has commanded the greatest abuse that is daily lived as the ‘power’ that we have all collectively accepted and allowed ‘money’ to have and exist as, which reveals that money as a hegemonic system was never meant to be in the best interest of all, but as a weapon of choice to create desires, inflate egos as the mind of men and justify denying life to others as market-forces that are obviously also man-made in the name of self-interest and personal glorification at the literal expense of others.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that money is a hegemonic system because its rules and regulations and actual functioning is not revealed, shown or taught in schools, which is a basic aspect/ point that should be implemented in order to make sure that all transactions existent as money can be equally-understood by people, as equal understanding implies equal-power. This is what makes economics and financial systems the very tool to exert power as their ‘terms and conditions’ as rules and regulations can only be understood by a people that are trained to perpetuate its apparent ‘complexity,’ which is meant to only divide and conquer over the population when the majority has no access to such understanding, or no interest at all in it due to it being a secluded and elitist group of people the ones that make the rules and regulations to their own benefit.

 

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that the greatest imperialism that humanity has lived is Money, as it became the primary motivation to control, divide and conquer in means of establishing power over a certain population, which is an action that money enabled through its unequal existence and access for all beings equally, becoming a means to establish control and ‘order’ upon the lives of human beings– hence Money as a language became the real ‘king of the world’ through processes of imperialism/ colonization as the imposition of a particular currency/ worth/ value over Life.

 

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to realize that the real dictator over the world is money as the creation of human being to which we have all enslaved ourselves and nature to, which is now revealing the consequences of such forced-imposition over Life as the depletion, destruction and absolute obliteration of nature and the animal kingdom evidences, as the demonstration of the obvious consequence of a man-made system in separation of ourselves is followed in means of having ‘power’ upon Life, not realizing that Life as a system can Only function if it is Equally regarded, Equally provided and given to all in Equality.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see everything around me in monetary terms and no longer as unconditional available matter that can be distributed to all beings equally, but instead has become an asset/ product in itself that can be capitalized, which is a form of having power/control over and raping the nature and unconditional-beingness of everything on Earth, turning it all into a separate value of which, when arbitrarily owned/ possessed by an individual, can be capitalized according to our current rules/ regulations of the monetary system that is not based on providing ALL with equal-access to everything that is here of/ as the Earth, but has made of Life a Market that was built in the name of establishing control over resources through deliberately denying to all human beings having equal-access to it, because that would mean that No Abuse would be possible = No Power over others/ life itself, which is what we are currently accepting and allowing as capitalism and our current monetary system.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to believe that through accepting money as a sign of ‘power’ to acquire that which I require to live, I was inheriting ‘the best option available’ as world-system due to the trust placed on parents and those in ‘powerful positions,’ wherein through believing and trusting that they are really looking after the ‘best interest of all,’ I proceeding to merely follow and comply the system, believing that it was the best possible option to live-by in this world – within this

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to see the ‘lack of money’ as part of the individual’s lessons for not wanting to contribute in a ‘productive sector’ of society, being lazy, bad karma and any other excuse that I could use in order to justify my acceptance of poverty and starvation as part of my everyday reality, becoming part of the ‘social scenario’ without further questioning it.

 

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that Money as a language was not created in the best interest of all, but rather in means of Controlling All for the benefit of some – which is why and how Money as it currently exist must come to an end as a language and re-signify itself with a New definition that can stand Here as the Reality of Who and What We Are as One and Equal, which means that Money can only take One Single and Only New Meaning and Value: Life in Equality for/as All.

 

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see, realize and understand that what we are witnessing as this world and all the events that point out to a monetary de-function/ death, is the inevitable fall of what had begun with a certain beginning and an end, as all systems based on energy that are not equally giving and receiving in a symbiotic relationship, are meant to die due to/ because of the inevitable abuse upon life with such an artificially-made system in means of control, which cannot be sustainable now that Life in Equality is the only Principle that will prevail in our existence.

 

I commit myself to make of Money as Equal-Money a Universal Language that all can have access to as a means of getting and receiving that which is required to live, wherein power over life is no longer possible/ existent as a meaning-itself within beings’ minds, as we will understand that it is only through giving and receiving in Equality that Who We Are as Equal Participants in this Social Organism can thrive as a Living-Organism in Equal relationships of power. This means that no more discrimination and elitism will ever exist once that we LIVE the Meaning of Equal-Money as Equally Giving and Receiving what we need and require to live as Equals in this world and Existence.

 

I commit myself to create the necessary Shift in the language that Money represents in this world, to re-educate ourselves on how it is through the value/ meaning/ worth we give to Words as the meaning of ‘who we are’ and what we accept and allow ourselves to exist-as, that we create our own prison or liberation – hence, the current monetary system is currently a prison-word that we can Revitalize and Shift into a New Meaning that Signifies Life in Equality – Money as a means to administrate the relationships between individuals and the resources available, to ensure that all are equally able to have access to the resources, products and services that stem from and of the Earth, and give / receive them unconditionally through money as an administrative tool to ensure that Real Economy takes place in consideration of the physicality of Life on Earth as Equality.

 

I realize that, just as the evolution and shifting necessary within the power that language has over beings and the relationships defined by words and people toward the environment and each other, it is a progressive process wherein the meaning of Life in Equality must be imparted as an Educational Process first, so that we can grasp what does Equality as a Quality of Being Here as Who and What we Are as Life means; this way, Money as a word lived in Equality means it is stemming from such understanding and living realization, which signifies it can only exist as a tool that benefits all as equal-participants of the world-community, using money as a language as a means of communication with the environment and each other in equal relationship to one another.

 

I realize that the assimilation of Life in Equality is but a concept that cannot be grasped only through words, because such words have Never Been Lived. Hence, I commit myself to stand as the example of what it means to equalize life as myself, as the self-forgiveness process of all the relationships that I have formed in separation of myself, to see how I have placed value/ worth in separation of myself as life itself – and from there, realize that in order to create an actual change in this world, the very Meaning of the Word Equality must be first lived within and as individuals that are able to stand as Living Examples of what Equality implies as a Living-Realization of Who and What we are in and as this World and Existence.

 

I commit myself to explain that a mint linguistic system must be in order with the ways that the population live within themselves, as words can only be Lived if realized as a Living-Aspect of Self, as a inherent quality that truly denotes who and what we are as such word, which means that Equal-Money in the Equal Money System  is the word that will allow us to first train ourselves to consider that the one and only value in Life is Life itself, and that such means of exchange as Equal-Money cannot mean any ‘more’ or ‘less’ than Life itself.

 

I commit myself to establish money as an Homogeneous System wherein all being and parts coexist in harmony where no harm is perpetuated by the lack or excess of money as ‘power over life,’ but instead is understood and amalgamated as an equal and one tool that each one can use as a word, as a means to signify the actual giving and receiving in equality, which is what ‘Love’ would really mean in a tangible and physical way as a System that Works for All Equally.

 

I commit myself to make of Money a language that signifies the best interest of all in all ways, that can be easily understood as there won’t be any fraudulent means to ‘gain power’ over others, as the only real power will only exist in Equality as Life.

 

“I commit myself to show that all words are Compromised to Serve the Profit Motive and that when you Investigate the nature of the Relationships implied by Words you will find the Profit/WIN Motive in there Somewhere.” Bernard Poolman *

 

Equal Money System: Vote on our Goals –Inform yourself

Desteni: Assistance and Support to Live Words in Equality as Life

 

 

Blogs:

• *Day 67: Relationship Dynamics – Part 2: Relationship with Money

• The Relationship of Attraction: DAY 67

 

Interview:

• Soul of Money Series – First chapter Free

Life Per-pose: is this how it’s ‘meant to be’?

Discovering God’s master plan can be rather stifling for the very first time when writing yourself to freedom seeing all that which we accepted and allowed in the name of ‘personal growth’ or ‘learning lessons in life’ within the acceptance of us having to go through this for some apparent mystical reason. Most of them are unacceptable acts of self-abusive nature that we as humans have kept us busy recreating as ‘our life’ while missing the actual factness of life as breath as the physical, here. This all began when reading this following quote and getting to the point of ‘debunking it’:

“There are no coincidences. Every event we experience and every person we meet has intentionally been put in our path to help raise our level of consciousness .” Cheryl Richardson

Then I realized that I used to think this way for a LONG time, finding all types of meanings to virtually ANYTHING in my world, making of my ‘life’ nothing else but a ‘puzzle’ wherein I’d be entertained enough all the time ‘placing it together’ or at least finding some type of ‘meaning’ to it all.

With this I mean that I sought for some type of ‘guidance’ and/or ‘divine clues’ a long time. I’ve kept written records of myself from the year 2000, beginning with petty notes of ‘going somewhere’ or having some major change in my life – which meant going to another school or having another ‘platonic love’ to write about – and within them all I was always ‘hoping for something to knock on my door to tell me the way to go’ and within this following the idea that whatever I ‘had to experience’ was related to some higher purpose.

Within seeking for ‘guidance’ I began searching for that ‘something’ that I had to ‘come across with’ to get to fulfill some kind of heaven-sent life purpose, I’ve scrapped off most of this as ‘who I am’ and I’m simply bringing it up here as it just re-emerged when taking this quote to write about it and before I place this quote on its deserved trash can, I have to take a look at how this type of statements actually enhanced my thoughts on there being a ‘meaning’, a ‘reason, a ‘purpose’ for anything/everyone I encountered myself with in this world.

Interesting that within this I never ever questioned myself why if I had to ‘follow a certain pattern’ never questioned the fact that it was a pattern and that it was already laid out before me – but anyways, I got my entertainment for several years on cherishing every single thing that could possibly mean ‘a piece in the puzzle’ that was ‘myself’ and ‘who I had to become’ which was someone that kept living ‘for the future’ and with various multiple future projections of myself in time, seldom being actually Here. I mean, when I was 10 years old I already wanted to be 20 to apparently ‘have all the fun I wanted to have as a grown up’ and this had only stopped since I’ve been walking this process, otherwise I’d probably still be picturing myself 10 years from now as a ‘realized person’ with whatever form of success I had sought to achieve before.

But the spiritual aspect of this came as I started getting to know of book writers, musicians and artists that had a similar vein and perspective on life which lead me to think ‘I’m on the right path’. Acquaintances would seem like ‘hints’ to the ‘next piece of the puzzle in my life’ which would become my ‘next thing to do’ – maybe this is why I dig that movie Memento that much because the guy ‘lives his life’ out of this apparent mission he’s got to fulfill and how we build ourselves as memories with attached value/ meaning to create ‘who we are’.

Every person that I got to know I’d know the exact days and numbers and in which ‘era’ of myself I was in, I was quite an obsessed freak on all types of seemingly rubbish data that would mean ‘the world’ to me. Every relationship that I had as the aspects that I thought I had to ‘walk through ‘ to eventually ‘get somewhere else’ became quite the ‘living-pattern’. This brings me back to stuff like tarot, the movie PI probably ignoring at that time how I had become fixated on such type of movies because I had sought to create of my life my own alchemist journey wherein at the end of it all, all the suffering, all the mistakes, all the sadness and despair that I over indulged and created for myself as my own life-story would’ve made ‘sense’ and would finally get some type of reward – such as getting to the source of it all and becoming an enlightened being of sorts forever leaving behind the physical coil that I had despised and disregarded for so long. I mean, ‘this mortal coil’ became one of those sentences that marked my view of myself as my world and thus seeking always something else separate from myself to ‘get somewhere else’ but here.

From this I created a literal ‘story in the making’ of my own life, through my own writings, through the stuff that I’d create, the pictures I’d take in a compulsive manner as to keep those moments in my memory as ‘who I am’ and as a reminder of whatever experience I had created for myself in that moment were also considered as the type of ‘divine sign’ as being in ‘this time and space in this particular moment’ which means =  ‘I must be on the right path!’. Literally, to this I can add how I’d be seeing patterns of numbers everywhere all the time, seeing eyes in the sky – without ever understanding how it is that we program ourselves to do that, well my mother explained me a bit on that but I denied the common sense presented as in such plain grounded words as ‘you’re creating it yourself’ because I wanted to preserve such mysterious side of my life as my own story-to-tell that would have this marvelous finale someday.

From every experience I would think  that ‘there was something to learn’, there must be ‘something more to it than that which I can understand at the moment’. Within this mindset I accepted and allowed myself to be in relationships wherein I’d get to experience a lot of self-acceptance through others while  suffering by their side, in a way believing that I had to pay some ‘karma’ about that or that I had somehow given up on myself at some point and now it was my turn to save people – yes this is called the saviour syndrome and we’ve walked it for quite some time through this process as well.

This became  a literal experience when I’d have male friends that were mostly ‘social outcasts’ for whatever reasons people and themselves would cage themselves in –either due to sexual preferences, schizoid and erratic addictive behaviors, bum-like creatures that spoke like poetry all the time, people that were usually  judged and that not many could ‘stand’ for a long period of time but myself. Once I had my ‘partner/friend/lover whatever living with my best gay friend lol that was quite a fascinating time wherein I literally thought that this was ‘meant to be’ for me to become the person that stands as the reason why none of them has finally pulled the trigger to blow their heads off = “I was meant to be there!” Oh god…

So, I started seeing myself as a ‘healer’ – or rather like a nurse as a someone that wanted to help people while creating this ever-glowing aura around myself. This personality was also supported by these guys around me and other people that I’d meet with whom I started behaving like in a ‘guru style’, becoming more of a light and lover easy-going ‘silent’ person which would be mostly submissive and accepting tantrums from my friends/relationships as something that ‘must had a meaning/ purpose/ reason to be in my life’, I’d mindfuck myself as far as ‘I must develop tolerance and patience to deal with these people, this is what I’ve chosen and I’m not aware of it, so I accept and comply to it” –

For this I applied the nonsensical idea that I had to pay for probably having been such a deranged lunatic in some other life and now having to be the one that ‘takes care of such beings that were ‘me’ but in this life’. I mean, what a masterpiece of a holy-wood movie I built of myself, and this we all do every time we seek to create these stories that would someday apparently ‘have any meaning’ to know who or what we are and what we’re supposed to be doing here in this world, that ‘lifepath’ and purpose in life thing would drive me crazy, always wanting to know ‘what I was supposed to be doing’ and thus placing trust in everything outside of myself to ‘guide me to it’ – never realizing self direction in any moment.

I actually accepted any type of emotional turmoil from myself and others around me as ‘lessons to be learned’ as points that I had to accept as part of my life due to me having misbehaved in the past. I accepted myself to be tied and bound to relationships just because I feared ‘losing myself’ as all the self-created value/worth that I had built around myself in relation to these particular persons and that others had accepted as ‘who I was’ which had to do with others ‘depending on me to keep going’ – kind of making of myself the necessary nurse that ‘must be by their side’ otherwise they’ll sink into depression and die. Even my family would make fun of me taking food to my friends and being there like the nurse to make sure they’d take their antidepressants and would have enough weed to not go into erratic behaviour and hissy fits with other people, to ensure that I’d stand for as long as it would take them to slow down and come back to senses. I obviously wasn’t living my life at all, I was living as someone else’s shadow going through the same cycles of asking ‘how are you’ hoping to hear ‘I’m okay’ instead of ‘same as always’.

I am exposing this because this is obvious self abuse that I accepted and allowed as myself – I was going to write ‘that I endured’ but that’d be self-victimization which became sort of like the usual ‘martyr’-personality wherein I literally thought that I had to suffer to make any real art, that I had to suffer to really know what ‘life is about’, that I had to endure pain and any form of disgrace for the sake of knowing my limits and thus ‘strengthen’ my resolution to be a ‘loving being’ in a dream-like state of life where ‘nothing would bother me’, where I would’ve found all the ‘keys and secrets to life’ after having lived a life that would seem no different to an esoteric monopoly game of hints, ups and downs that were apparently ‘part of the plan’.

Such ‘masterplan’ of my life  was never master in fact and it was a preprogrammed plan for us to be entertained within our own personal mythologies that we decided to cultivate as the seeking of meanings, codes, symbols or any other trivial fact that would become part of the beads to tie into a single chain that would have some coherence at some point in our lives, without ever seeing how we had missed life, the actual ‘beingness’ of being here, embracing ourselves as the physical when going into a dimensional shift of a ‘someday’-situation  being alright, of being finally ‘in paradise’.

I must say that after these years I’ve made quite a ‘progress’ in letting go of creating this type of ‘coincidences having any meaning’ in my life and making of myself just as another character that I would often indulge into within reading and losing myself into it which I would then try to correlate to the events I’d have in my own life. Now I’ve simplified my living to directing it here as the moment instead of bouncing back and forth into a past that seemed like the usually tagged ‘good old times’ wherein I’d feed my premature nostalgia and/or dream of a future wherein I would apparently be settled and ‘knowing what I’m here fore’ for whatever ‘divine’ reason it’ would be.

Every time that we see ourselves saying ‘it had to be this way’, ‘it happened for some reason’, ‘this things don’t happen by accident’ – Oh right, there’s another movie I can relate to this single point in how ‘orchestrated’ our entire reality was to the point of being sarcastically tragic, that’s ‘Magnolia’ and I’d confer this as one of my favorite movies because of how they depicted a series of seemingly unimportant events getting to a climatic intricate cross-wired story-telling that develops into a resolution of realizing how fragile we as human beings are when we are pray of our emotions/ feelings as well as being subject to death, tragedy and seemingly unfathomable natural events that could twist even the most ‘grounded head’ around for a second look. In the movie they emphasize how ‘things cannot be simple coincidences or random accidents, but would have some intricate unfathomable explanation that would mostly point out to a ‘god’ being the master puppeteer of them all, one sick god for the matter of this this movie and the nature of events that take place.

This is what I now realize but I’d solace myself to  think that all of this life would also make sense at the end, which is how I kept me in an idle status of hoping and ‘waiting’ for something/someone to come and ‘save me’ – lol even the main song for that movie’s soundtrack is called ‘Save me’ by Aimee Mann. This correlates to when my secret desire to ‘meet god’ grew bigger and my indulgence in conspiracy theories and end of the world stories began ‘ringing like bells to my ears’ as it would – at least – give me the sensation of ‘being somewhere near to the truth’ while neglecting the obvious truth of myself that I had accepted and allowed while existing in such constant ‘seeking for a momentum’, ‘seeking for such relationship that would be a key-point to my reality’, seeking for a meaning behind anything from a sequenced number on my microwave to a ‘glaring eye’ in the sky  that I would stumble upon, everyone I met that I thought I’d had to ‘meet’ and take something from to make myself…

Now:

Imagine millions living like this with all of this networks of information that we go storing as ‘who we are’ – no wonder we’ve created of this world as a stage to ‘gain the contest’, ‘run the quest’ for something, as a continuous seeking and ‘exploring’ everything and all that could ‘bring me a little closer to god’ in whatever form and sensation it would make itself present.

The moment I realized I had to stop this continuous self-creation as the ‘special character in the movie’ I’d perceive myself to be dead, a ‘goner’, idle and empty which was only me stopping from feeding my mind into these continuous self-created self-fuck mind-propulsion that sought a ‘new mystery’ every time to debunk and occupy myself in this as part of ‘seeking to find myself’ Lol, fascinating how much we disregarded our physical reality while existing in such a constant invisible surrounding bubbles as our minds filled with words, pictures , memories that could eventually mean something to myself or someone else for the sake of obtaining a ‘greater communication with the whole’ or whatever I would define ‘god’ to be, seeking to stitch all the moments and ‘get the final picture’ at the end of it all, like a quilt that I could then cover myself with and be at ‘peace’.

Once we look back and see how self support is always here as Breathe, we can laugh at all the intricacies and details that we’ve kept for the sake of ‘following such path’ and seeking a greater connection to it all.

I recognize this is the type of writing that allowed me to have a sense of self-recognition as all that I have accepted and allowed myself to become within my ‘personal history’ and place this process into perspective to see how I’ve gone from existing in such a limited frame of only building my own character and my own stories for the sake of my own indulgence in the existence of some ‘greater truth’ to be discovered – and now have a sense of realization with regards to how limited I had been living when only seeking my ultimate fulfillment and pleasure while disregarding the entire world and whatever was going on through such times when I became self-centered all the way.

Part of spirituality is the promotion of this individualism wherein apparently you are encouraged to ‘let go of your ego’ while promoting the creating of yourself as some type of ‘divine act of god’ that would have some grand meaning after all the shake ups and fuckups would’ve been walked and blindly accepted and allowed  without ever realizing: wait a minute, I can actually stop myself from supporting this, I can actually support myself to not participate in these constant search for something ‘greater’ than myself, I can actually be here without desiring to become something, attain something or seek for someone but instead face myself and embrace myself.

When living in this constant search for meaning and purpose we miss what’s here which is to be breathed, we miss the reality that we exist as while existing in an apparent ‘better past’ and moving into the future hoping that you’re able to ‘make it through’ this life. It is through this non-self acceptance of ourselves as ‘this mortal coil’ that we remain believing that there is some ‘intention’ behind our lives, hence that there is some marvelous being watching our back. It was never a god, it was just a fucked up program designed to keep us generating feelings and emotion to power some creator’s ideal of ‘heaven’.

Now what we’ve hit the ground, we can stop drifting off to some alternate reality see that there is no meaning, no purpose no ‘intention’ behind this to seek other than the intention and direction as the purpose of life to create a world that’s best for all, because there’s nothing else to do really and we’ve neglected this for such a long time that it’s only fair we dedicate this life to make it a reality.

There is no ‘raising of consciousness’ available in your local white-light store (not the apple one) anymore – that’s all gone. What remains is here as breathing fleshy-bloody living human beings that has only each moment to establish ourselves as life. We shut down all the superior-god ideas being possible within this reality and focus on the matters of this world of which there are many points to take care of so that we can move as human beings from our self-dug cave of enlightenment.

Wake up!

and thanks for reading up to here.

Please read Sunette’s explanation and perspective on this quote which certainly is the great point of direction required once we’ve realized the fuckups that we’ve accepted as ‘our life’ and reality:

Relationships are no “Coincidence”

Consciousness is the grid of enslavement that we believed ‘had to be raised’ – what a mindfuck.

Get to know the real story of our existence at Desteni