“Whoever is the cause of another becoming powerful, is ruined himself for that power is produced by him either through craft or force; and both of these are suspected by the one who has been raised to power” – Niccolò Machiavelli
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to integrate the illusion of power and hierarchy as part of ‘who I am’ and ‘how reality operates’ without realizing how within this acceptance, one gives way to laws, rules, regulations to dictate one’s life through politics, through laws, through so-called education systems that in no way have inculcated living principles, a living understanding of who we are as living beings that are made of the same substance – instead, I accepted and allowed myself to learn of the differences, the hierarchy, the power structures, the laws to abide to, following the education system to the T and believing that such structure was created in the best interest of myself, my life, the life of others and of this entire reality, therefore
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to abdicate my own responsibility to myself, to others, to this world through immediately giving up my ability to comprehend, realize, understand reality through physical living principles and instead, gave myself into knowledge and information, rules, supposed principles that I integrated as the way that I conceive and understand reality which I have used to lead myself through the world as a passive participant, believing that the existence of power in the political class was inherent to such structure that governs our lives
I realize that such power could have not existed if I hadn’t integrated the concept of hierarchy, authority, ruling powers, kings, presidents, monarchs, tyrants, dictators, magnates and any other position of power that implies a form of control and deliberate abuse in order to generate such power as the accumulation of ‘moreness’ at the cost of equality as life.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to ever experience powerlessness toward authorities/power structures not realizing that my own submission, fear and experiences toward the idea of something superior to myself, validates and enables the creation of such separation to exist as ‘how our reality operates’ – therefore
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that the actual existence of the system is not in the people outside of myself, but it exists within and as myself from the moment that I accepted thoughts, feelings, emotions and the entire comprehension of my reality in inequality as ‘how things are’ becoming the perfect slave and follower to whichever idea, construct and system that was formed from the beginning of our time and simply agreeing to give it continuation from generation to generation through education, culture as if such rules, ways, structures and systems were genuinely representing the laws of our being and what is best for all which was never so.
I realize that having a myopic view of the problem of the world in only focusing on one system, one area such as the offense-defense balances of political powers, the violation of human rights, the deliberate fraud the monetary system is are only consequential outflows of the inherent hegemon/ monarch/ king/ ruler/ leader/ tyrant and dictator that I have accepted and allowed to exist within and as myself as the mind, as the system that is the source and origin of ‘all the powers that be,’ that is the real image and likeness of what our reality currently exists as because words themselves as laws, people themselves as actors, money printed with numbers are in essence just part of this reality no different to anything or anyone else and that as any tool, it can be used for the benefit of all OR for the detriment of all. In this
I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that the key to change the structures of this system resides in the mind of each individual human being, for it is to realize that the best laws can be written to guarantee the best living conditions to all, the best monetary system created as a tool to guarantee the access to all the necessary means to live in a dignified manner can be created, a proper structure to ensure the preservation and sustainability of the ecosystem, taking care of the flora and fauna, the best constitutions can be written, but unless the nature of the human being changes = nothing will change.
I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to abdicate my responsibility to life by integrating knowledge and information that directly separates, severs, divides, hierarchizes, abuses and confuses our relationship to one another as equals by nature and in this immediately giving into the belief that something or someone can genuinely have power over myself, which begins at a thought level and exists in that moment that we learn how we must follow rules, ways, laws, regulations or else we would be punished by god/ authority/parent/teacher/police/judges and any character that we accepted and allowed to perceive would have power over others through the threat of punishment, thus having to follow the laws, rules, regulations written by us humans that never have existed with a foundation of genuinely caring for all, but instead already replicating and mimicking our own learned – accepted and allowed – ways of thinking and conceiving reality through the mind, which is a system extracts life substance from the physical body to generate energy, using all means and ways to ensure that the power/ the energy is able to be obtained over life, deliberately using/abusing the physical, the life force to power up its own existence and continuation that was then prescribed as laws, rules, regulations, ‘principles,’ morality, ethics, philosophy, wisdom, religions, politics, science and any other form of acceptance of such premises to be ‘the reality’ of who we are, ‘how things are,’ immovable precepts not realizing they were in fact pre-sets, pre-determined and pre-defined ways to guarantee the submission of who we are as life to the mind, the power-system and believing ourselves to be only that: pawns in a system, having a purpose, fulfilling that purpose or else we would die/ we would be punished and cease to exist.
I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to in the beginning, fear the non-existence of myself based on the threat of ‘the powers that be’ whether it is the figure of a god, ‘justice’, parent, teacher, tyrant, judge, dictator, president, director etc. which are nothing else but necessary figures of control in a system that required such fear to maintain ourselves subordinated to the status quo, the ‘how things are and always have been’ and according to this acceptance and allowance of our history, our knowledge and information, we became slaves to it with an inability to think outside the box, because we accepted the box as the vox/ the voice in our head, in our mind as ‘who we really are. ‘
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to taint the meaning of authority with fear, with authoritarianism as the abuse of power instead of realizing that the authority of myself is the ability to direct and write myself to be a self-directive being in self honesty, using the real power that is the physical body to do so.
I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to abdicate my self-authority as the ability to direct myself in common sense considering what is best for myself and all in the way that I live and relate to everything and everyone in this reality to an idea of having to be ‘loyal to the laws, loyal to authorities, loyal to my family, loyal to a country, loyal to myself’ as the pre-determined role of being a follower of the rules and regulations believing this to be something ‘good’ that would make me by default a ‘good citizen’ and as such, believe that this submission and subordination to become an obedient individual to ‘the powers that be’ would make me a remarkable, loyal and trustworthy person, without realizing it was exactly the opposite.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to ever participate in any form of superiority, subordination, inferiority, as the polarity in which our mind as the generator of this frame through which we view and conceive reality is existing as, which means that every time that I give my power away – which is the actual power of every breath – to a train of thought, to imagination, to an experience I am already recreating the slave-master relationship that I have existed as within myself, individually within the disparity that I’ve become as a body, a mind and beingness that has been suppressed by my constant and deliberate participation in the mind in the acceptance of it as ‘who I really am’ – this is then understood as the basic hierarchical relationship I’ve existed as within myself, therefore toward others as well.
I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to from a very early age believe that the intention of the creation of governmental structures, nations, states, and all the ‘powers that be’ was to guard my life, the life of all living beings in this planet, thinking and believing that if there was an authority behind the creation of our education system, the supervision of what we eat/drink, the rules that we guide our lives with then we would be immediately safe and our interests would be secured, without realizing that any formation of a hierarchical structure was never meant to be supportive for all individuals, for the existence of a hegemon/god/powerful entity implies already the subordination and abuse of everyone else that does not form part of such superior structure/class/elite.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that looking at political actors as the ones to blame is futile since we are the ones that from the beginning of our existence accepted the idea of god/superior, powers/ leaders and any other figure of power as ‘how society must function’ within the belief that we were incapable of taking care of ourselves, of genuinely understanding and exercising any form of self-governance – because we never pondered why we weren’t taking care of the matters of this world by our own hands – we became passive, complacent and subjugated to the laws, rules and regulations that we instead feared not following due to expecting any form of punishment for not doing so, instead of pondering why we had to follow rules that we inherently knew were not supportive every individual in equality and instead, gave into fear and decided to not question, not investigate, not challenge the way things are because in our own minds, we have never really been the actual director of our lives in every moment of breath, and instead gave ourselves into fear.
I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to integrate the belief that people in positions of power were ever placed in such positions to genuinely care for ourselves, to genuinely act in the best interest of all and within that, creating and developing a trust toward that which I believe was meant to ‘direct me in the best interest of all’ without realizing that this false conception has led us to believe that there were others taking care of ourselves and we then didn’t have to do anything about ourselves, understanding the structures by which our lives are governed – and instead focus on merely developing our individual lives accepting by default the limitation to ever aspire to get to any position of ‘power’ because in our education, in our comprehension of our reality such ‘realms of power’ were by default concealed of our understanding, leaving ourselves and conducting ourselves then to only conform, comply and ‘make the best’ of the limitations, the deliberate disparity and scarcity that we have lived in throughout our entire human history wherein as society, as human beings we have never coexisted as equals for we have always accepted and allowed the belief and idea that something or someone must be ‘on top,’ must be the one that ‘sets the rules,’ ‘makes the decisions’ and in this
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become complacent and lazy to learn or even care to establish proper foundations at a mind level to know how to live, act and direct ourselves in the consideration of what will be best for myself and everyone else equally, what will not harm or abuse others, what will support the sustainability of the relationships that enable life to continue, the relationship toward oneself as an equal part of such life – instead, we gave our ability to understand and comprehend the reality as physicality to the mind as the imposition of illusions made real through the violation of physical laws such as the notion of ‘power’ as something or someone “superior” defined by the ability to abuse, control, manipulate, deceive in self interest.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to neglect the consequences that exist as the totality of this reality based on the abuse and harm justified and conducted by people in positions of power/authority acting within the framework of a ‘power structure’/ hierarchy/ world system, not realizing that in such blind acceptance al of us, one by one, have played and become the silent bystander that has witnessed the abuse of each other, of all life and did nothing because we believed and justified it with saying that ‘someone else was responsible for it,’ and in this even becoming resentful, hostile, angry and rebellious toward authority without realizing that we have only been angry at ourselves for the ignorance, the complacency, the subordination that we accepted as ‘who we are’ in our belief of being incapable of ‘doing anything about it’ –
And yes, it is now ingrained to the point where it may seem impossible to deconstruct the foundation of this hierarchical structure that exists in every word in/as our mind, yet it is definitely possible to establish common sense, to understand basic living principles that benefit us all and as such go bit by bit, thread by thread deconstructing the fallacy, the lie, the fiction, the belief system, the knowledge and information that we have used to justify our abdication of self-responsibility to ourselves and all life.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that by condemning ‘the powers that be’ all that can be realized is how any and all forms of abuse and atrocities are not only conducted by the individual themselves, but as the pattern that has been accepted and allowed, integrated as part of our ‘human nature’ from the beginning of time wherein the way to survive was to abuse and through these survival mechanisms, we then followed through to create our institutions, our laws, our philosophy, our knowledge, our ethics and morals based on this premise wherein the inherent belief of hierarchy as a normal organization of life has become our very self-created demise.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that only through education about how the system operates, one is able to conduct change in the world, not realizing that this world as it is is the result of each individual’s participation in the system, as the system existing as the continuation of the past that exists within and as ourselves in the mind, harboring the basic premise and permission of the existence of direction as words in the form of knowledge and information that has never been existent to benefit the life of us all as human beings and our relationships toward everything that is equally here.
Therefore, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to continue to look at the balance of power to create solutions outside of myself, without realizing that even if the best laws, the greatest and most equal form of government is implemented it is only the structure, the foundation of the system to be – however the actuality, the matter, the substance of the system is not existing in the laws which are only words, or in the positions of people in power that are only fulfilling a role within the greater scheme of such structure, it is existent in how each one of us live and interact with one another wherein basic principles are lacking in our interaction with and toward the environment/ the reality that we live in
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to by defining myself as the mind that thinks in hierarchical values, impose such values, such perception, such frame and filter through which I see reality upon everything and everyone else, giving up my ability to see directly reality, to direct myself and focus on sheer basic observation principles where there are no tags, no inherent differences that can make us think or believe that some are entitled to be and have ‘more’ than others.
This is how knowledge and information on how the system is structured is only viewing a blueprint, the map, and the map can be corrected to follow new ways in which we can direct ourselves to a better destination – we are the ones that have to change the route in fact, we are the ones that have to direct ourselves to actually walk that process of changing the route, the ways to walk it or else the map as the words, as the new proposals, new treaties, new constitutions, new laws, new presidents, new monetary systems as organizational structures, as genuine representations of our self-governance and self-authority will be useless and remain as depictions, as representations or ‘dead print’ unless we genuinely live them, incarnate them as the living principles that we should have always lived by and is only now that we are able to see beyond the ‘mindframe’ that we’ve always existed as that we have the opportunity to change the way we conceive our reality, to understand how authority is not something imposed onto ourselves, but how each one of us accepted and allowed hierarchy to exist within and as ourselves first, otherwise it would have not been successful once such ‘authority figures/ powers that be’ would be created i n reality if we didn’t have the proper mindset to understand, to conceive and comply to the existence of such authority-figures/roles as part of our reality, as ‘how things are,’ never questioning why we required others to take care of ourselves.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that through the blind acceptance of teachings/education as the integration of ‘how things work in reality’ I became a complicit in the malfunctioning, the abuse and the violation of life in the name of merely complying and not questioning my life nor that of others which means that through this blind acceptance I became part of the necessary continuation, perpetuation of the structures of power and abuse by the sheer integration of words such as power, government, authority, control, fear, justice, laws, education, family and all roles of ‘authority’ contained in them as ‘how things work,’ ‘who I am toward others’ and in this locking myself down as just another pawn within the system that gives power away to others in the belief of others caring for myself and guarding my best interests, which is as we know not at all so.
I realize that in order to conduct genuine change in this world, looking at politics, looking at economics, looking at education as isolated systems is not the way to create a change because change won’t happen just by re-writing the laws, codes, books and explaining how things operate to everyone because what matters is the decision that each one of us take in order to live and integrate the living principles of life in equality with which we will conduct ourselves to live the necessary changes and corrections to the way in which we have lived thus far.
I realize that the lack of common sense and living principles is what has propitiated our submission and compliance to “learning” how to view this world through the mind, through concepts, through value structures, through hierarchical orders instead of learning how to view each individual as an equal, each living being in this reality as part of who we are and as such realizing that in order to be able to organize ourselves, to direct ourselves, we don’t require another to tell us what to do, but instead we have to live by principles of no harm or abuse toward ourselves or others as well as self-responsibility as our ability to respond, to act, to direct ourselves and our lives in consideration of what’s best for all.
When and as I see myself viewing the power structures in this world as something greater than myself, I stop and I breathe – I realize this is the outflow and consequence of my own psychological conditioning, called education which is nothing else but the acquisition of knowledge and information that enables me to accept and allow any form of authority, abuse, power, to exist in this world as ‘how things are’ which is thus an individual process of compliance that has taken place wherein we have learned how to ‘cope with the system’ and ‘accept the status quo’ instead of directly seeing how and why we have come to accept such world-orders without a question, to begin with, and realizing how such ‘power’ only exists in the belief I have imposed upon them/upon the structure and system in itself the moment that I abdicated my own.
I realize that my understanding of reality through the filters of education, politics, economics, philosophy, religion has created the entire continuation of this entire system by living within the compliance of their existence as dogma, as how things are and operate, how everything has always been with which we have become passive participants in the continuation of the same cycles of negligence toward life, over and over and over again.
I commit myself to stop any experience when I believe I have no say upon/ have no power/ have no authority to direct a point, instead of realizing that we can only have power to direct ourselves to be the living example of what it is to live in consideration of all beings as equal, the best living forms and ways in which we can coexist and how if our reality, our creation is not existing as the living principles that correspond to what is best for all, then we have to become that change and promote that change through the understanding of individual/ self’s responsibility within it all, realizing that by abdicating our responsibility = we give our power away and as such, we directly enable and validate any form of abuse that comes with the structure of power as something greater/superior than our individual volition.
I commit myself to live by principles that contemplate and integrate life in equality, what is best for all at all times so that no division, no separation, no judgment, no proselytism exists within me other than the living example of what it is to live by principles of life in equality, of the equality within and as everything that is here as myself and as such understanding my own mind, my own ‘brainwashing’, my own conditioning, training and point of control to then see how it is only through changing the way that I relate to myself, to my own mind, to my own thoughts and concepts about reality to go seeing what is useful and what isn’t to support myself and others to realize that if we want change, we have to be the change but that isn’t about demanding or only understanding how things operate, but focusing on self change, the how I live, how I interact with myself as my body and mind and with others always considering the ways in which we can coexist in real harmony and peace by ceasing to exist in the belief of powers over ourselves .
I commit myself to realize that the power we all have exists as the functionality of the physical body in every breath, and how we are able to have that authority of and as ourselves as we go integrating living principles that are the genuine way to have power in this reality, to learn how to live and coexist In equality.
I commit myself to restore or integrate a sound meaning of words that are not tainted by the mindframes/structures within which they have been originally constructed to support belief systems of separation and inequality, but instead are words that can be lived in a sound manner with a certain living outcome that is best for all.
I commit myself to understand the systems through which we have separated ourselves from ourselves, how we have created this creation so that we cease to recreate the same patterns and instead plan/integrate/initiate and ‘install’ a new living program, a new set of directions, new living instructions that are aligned to taking responsibility of ourselves and of each other as one and equal.
“Remember, whatever is faced or created within self – self is and has been the creator. Do not live in fear of what is here, understand it, realise self as it and assert yourself to stand-up for change, to not expose others as you to such a world – but create a world in which they will be embraced with equality and oneness and actual living”
– Bernard Poolman
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I’ve been having in the back of my head how I developed the survival system of behaving politely/ in a socially acceptable manner since I was a little child. This is mostly to how I was raised by my parents and other socioeconomical factors that have created definitive ‘marks’ on who I am as my behavior.
The image that comes to my mind is a picture that I saw once in my photo album from my first years alive and I am placing a napkin hanging from the collar of my t-shirt with a rather righteous/haughty/ fancy look and my mother is next to me looking at the camera. Another one is a picture of me with a paper-made crown sitting on a sofa, like a ‘throne’ for a queen when I was just 2 and a half years old; there’s another one of me sinking my hands in a bucket of water while my then nanny is crouching down and looking at me, probably warning me about getting all wet and that I should not sink all my arms into the bucket of water that was probably as tall as my waist line. My father’s car is in the background which means I wanted to clean it just the way he does, I was only 3 years old then. There’s also pictures of me having these huge headphones and sitting next to a tape recorder while having my mouth open, which means I was singing. Well, all those points developed into defined personalities such as being always holding a napkin on my hand while eating as a symbol of ‘proper manners’ and eating behavior, being a cleanliness freak, being a ‘music lover’ and being a self-righteous ego on two feet within a sense of having some domain or specialness in me. And I was only 2 to 3 years old in all of those photos.
So this point came up as something to write about when listening to some interviews today in relation to observing behavior, which is one dimension that I have not fully delved into looking myself as behavior linked to the personalities that I developed throughout the years. I tested out a word to write about today and ‘manners’ came up which is then how this whole point opened up.
Being polite is one of the main ‘characteristics’ and behavior that I play out when being with people and ‘in public,’ and the image of my father playing to be a polite soldier comes up, actually my mother would call me something like little tin soldier when I was a little girl, which probably explains a lot as well. Okay but not to deviate from the point. My father would always let us know to ‘be still!’ and basically both my parents educated us in such a way that we would act like little grown up people.
This politeness got imprinted ‘heavily’ later on from when I was 6-7 years when socializing with my parents friends whom I perceived as ‘more than’ because of essentially having quite a lot of money and having these huge houses and living in cool residential areas that I would enjoy going to play to. In that, I would perceive such world as everyone being ‘polite’ – which is how I’ve linked it to being ‘political’ in the character/way of being that politicians act like, which is basically focusing on presenting a particular façade to play safe all the time when being in public.
‘Keeping a good image’ was something also induced by my mother, hers was mostly in the ‘expressive’ aspect of watching my mouth and not being ‘impertinent’ when speaking to people –my father focused on the physical behavior, like telling us to sit properly and crouching down to always pull up my socks and ensuring my shoes are clean. I’m laughing because of how much I simply accepted that as ‘normal’ and that’s why I had such a hard time interacting with other kids because they didn’t give a fuck about manners and being polite or getting their clothes dirty – so I developed a judgmental experience toward anyone that ‘would not be polite’ = being a regular human being, really.
Till this day I’ve caught myself going into a reaction the moment that I perceive that someone is Not being polite as in ‘taking advantage of a position’ – like someone wanting to win a place in the queue for something – or getting one step ahead of me to have a better place while waiting for the train, seemingly ‘unnoticeable events’ wherein I have automated responses of criticizing and judging people because of them not being polite.
The points that I’ll be walking and opening up are aspects of myself that I had not opened up for having them as ingrained belief systems that I deemed as ‘positive’ and in that, thinking that I should not bother to look at them, without realizing that there is actually a great part of myself ‘hidden’ behind these seemingly cool attributes that I’ve lived so far. As long as there is an entire indoctrination system behind it, I must investigate it, which means that no matter how ‘cool’ I perceive a point that I’m living to be, I must investigate it to make sure that whatever I am building/ creating and establishing myself here as, is based on actual self-understanding of How I got to be ‘who I am’ at the moment – in such case, how ‘manners’ exist as a belief system charged with a positive experience wherein the ‘negative’ is created the moment that I, through my politeness-filter of reality, judge and criticize everyone that I believe are Not polite and within that Not ‘humanly’ enough to interact with.
This means that I’ve created of my ‘politeness’ an elitist system wherein I believe that a well-educated being will have certain attributes that make them consider others before them, a way of perpetual altruism that often evokes a ‘good feeling’ out of it, which means it is an energetic-based personality and not an unconditional expression of self, as a sense of neighborism that is acquired within the basic principle and understanding of What’s Best for All as Equals.
I’ll be continuing opening up different aspects and dimensions of this ‘manner’ point as the behaviors ingrained with personalities throughout different stages of my life, which I had not opened up in fear of them being almost ‘self-glorifying’ yet suppressed and still existent within me, which means that every time I suppress it, I am recreating it and accepting it as ‘part of myself/ who I am’ without even noticing it.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist as ‘politeness’ as a behavioral pattern that I had deemed to be ‘positive’ and ‘good’ for myself within the belief that being polite is an attribute that all people should live by, as that would make our coexistence ‘easier’ in this world, without considering that it is actually only an experience that I have created based on survival as the improved acceptance that a polite person gets within society and certain socieconomical stratus wherein money dictates the education that a person has, and in that, the behavioral patterns that denote a person’s ‘quality of living’ and parental values at home.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give continuation to a behavioral pattern such as ‘having good manners’ from the starting point of revealing/ showing that ‘I am well educated’ and in that, creating an ideal of who I am as ‘my education’ as ‘my family’ and ‘values’ that I have given to a certain behavior wherein I then judge/ criticize anyone that cannot fit into a category of being well-educated/ polite, without realizing how this is a belief system that I have adopted and continued in the name of representing ‘who I am’ as a configuration based on how my parents wanted us to ‘be’ within the social context wherein high-education, manners and ‘values’ are highly regarded, which would ensure our survival and positioning in the world system within a high-stratus in society.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that a person with ‘good manners’ is well educate as a synonym of being ‘a good neighbor’/ good person which implies that I have created my own elitist value schemes toward people according to how I see them through my politeness-filter personality, which implies that I will only ‘mingle’ with those that I perceive as educated, well mannered and polite according to how I was taught I should be/ behave as a little child at home.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a superiority experience within me whenever I see myself being ‘polite’ toward people and getting an ‘instant-gratification’ reward such as being thanked for doing something for another which is then implying that my ‘politeness’ is not an unconditional common sensical expression of and as self, but still an energetic personality that I try to keep up to, without realizing that in this, anything that steps out of my ‘politeness schemes’ I judge and criticize as lower/ inept/ rascal/ savage, without realizing that this is how I have had such an immediate judgmental behavior toward people while interacting in reality, due to how I have been conditioned to believe that polite people are ‘worthy’ and the opposite are ‘unworthy,’ in this
I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see and realize how politeness/ well mannered people is linked within my belief system to having enough money and in a certain social position that I have been taught is ‘more valuable’ than someone that is uneducated/impolite/ rascal/ savage according to the judgments that I learned as the way to denote someone that would probably not have enough money to be ‘well educated’ and in that, accepting the point of discriminating people according to the amount of money they would have, while absolutely neglecting and not even considering why on Earth such polarities even exist.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself for having regarded my parent’s imprinting onto myself as ‘good manners’ as something that I had to be grateful for, without realizing the actual belief system as elitism that I accepted and allowed to exist within me when linking good manners to ‘affluent people’ and bad manners/ impolite people to ‘lower class/ moneyless people’ and in that, creating a positive experience toward ‘fellow polite people’ and a negative experience toward ‘impolite people,’ as well as a neutral experience to people that I would perceive as expression-less within not being decidedly polite or impolite, which would be then linked to undefined within my schemes of human categorization according to education and money.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a sense of comfort and openness as an experience created upon interacting with someone that I perceive and profile as being ‘well educated/ polite’ within the identification of that which I was taught I should be like and aspire to become, which I accepted as a valuable aspect within human beings which lead me to create a positive experience within myself whenever I behave in a ‘polite manner,’ while creating the exact opposite as a negative experience as the immediate profiling of people that I perceive to be savage/ uneducated/ impolite, which I have accepted to discriminate/ judge in my mind while believing that I didn’t want anything to do with such people, creating the ultimate elitist experience based on manners.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that ‘How I behave’ is who I really am.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to still perpetuate the ‘ingrained values’ that I acquired at home, that I have kept due to them being seemingly ‘positive attributes’ within my personality, without realizing that it is in these ‘values’ that I have perpetuated the existence of good/ bad, positive and negative as well as neutral experiences toward people according to How I deem them to be within my polite/ impolite schemes, as the manners they present on face value when interacting with people in any given moment.
When and as I see myself categorizing someone as polite and creating a positive experience within me toward them, I stop and I breathe – I realize that I am accessing my politeness-filter wherein I am valuing and regarding the people as ‘good’ and ‘benevolent’ based on the attitudes and manners that they present. Therefore I realize that I must treat every person equally regardless of how they ‘present’ themselves, as I realize that such manners are a survival-masquerade to remain as ‘worthy’/ ‘valuable’ within a system where money decides who is ‘worthy’ and who is not and seeing good manners as the direct consequences of having money to be well educated, in this creating a positive experience toward people with money.
When and as I see myself judging a person as being ‘impolite’/ presenting bad behavior such as ‘bad manners’ I stop and I breathe – I realize that I am accessing the politeness-personality wherein I am then adjusting my experience to be negative and derogatory toward such being for being seemingly ‘uneducated’ and a ‘rascal’ without considering at all that I am creating such separation based on the link that I’ve created in my mind as ‘bad manners = poor education’ as a symbol to represent lack of money/ being poor, which I have created and associated a negative experience toward.
I realize that with me stopping the polite/ impolite judgments toward myself and others, I stop perpetuating the current money system wherein rich/ wealthy creates a positive experience while poverty/ lack of money represents and creates a negative experience, as well as the non-expressive people that I have judged as ‘mediocre’ which are all values I have separated myself from in relation to the same values we have separated ourselves from life through/ as money.
More to come…
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