Tag Archives: optimism

423. Proof that I’ve been Mind Controlled

 

Following through a bit with this ‘happiness’ redefinition, I would not have been able to be comfortable in opening up this word to redefine if I hadn’t looked at a key aspect that I’ve been noticing for quite some time in walking this process of removing/stopping past self-definitions.

This became clearer when I shared in a podcast I called Doing Good = Uncool? about how currently there is a tendency to deem everything that is rebellious and antagonistic as ‘cool’ and everything that is supportive, disciplined and orderly as ‘uncool’ – and the way I found out that this mostly was a personal perception is when I attempted to find pictures on Google images that would depict this type of construct or judgments upon what I had seen as ‘cool’ and ‘uncool,’ there were no pictures for me to depict that! So that made it obvious that I had to rather look at it from a very personal manner instead and ended up creating my own ‘picture’ to depict the kind of perception I had held within me.

 

Cool vs uncool

 

My previous attempt in life was to become what I defined and believed to be a ‘cool’ person, so just because I had gotten so much bashing/criticism from my peers while growing up for always being ‘the straight A’ person in school and so being defined as nerdy for that and ‘tight’ or ‘uncool,’ I focused on finding ways to shake those definitions off by being very specific in the type of ‘person/personality’ I would become. This is how I decided to pick and integrate aspects that I could deem were going ‘against the grain,’ so to speak, against the expectations that I perceived everyone had around me. This influenced everything of me, the way I would dress/look, act, speak, the topics I would bring up, the kind of books I read, the kind of music I’d listen to, the way I would relate to people, to my family etc.  And TV was a great source of ‘inspiration’/dormant brainwashing for that, as I have shared here previously that I mostly grew up watching MTV and so there I shaped all my preferences toward everything and everyone that seemed to ‘challenge’ the status quo, to go against the flow and step out of the ‘schemes’ in one way or another, or be intimidating toward others, as a way to ‘challenge the establishment’ or being in a constant ‘defense mode,’ which is a ‘trendy’ way to actually hide the fear that instigates these ‘hardass’ personalities.

Little did I know that this was part of a greater scheme of social engineering to have kids grow up aspiring to be ‘rockstars’ or ‘artists’ and had nothing to do or no sense of responsibility to this world, but instead define all things ‘rebellious’ and ‘antagonistic to the system’ as being super cool.

So, this is how I then became what I could define as a disciplined rebel, because it’s not like I started slacking at school, I actually proved that I could still ‘pull out a straight A’ without even studying at times, just by being very attentive in class and so using my ‘wits’ to challenge professors and classmates alike – lol, I was really in for being like a typical dissident in many ways and deem that as cool, even if for others it wasn’t, to ‘me’ that was the definition of ‘being an outcast’ and enjoying myself within that because of seeing myself as ‘special,’ as having ‘no trend’ without realizing it was a trend and it was becoming more and more common in order to get people reacting, being angry and antagonistic against everything and everyone, just to remain in perpetual conflict and never looking at solutions.

Of course nowadays doing this type of ‘dissidence’ has become like the norm and it’s no longer as ‘shocking’ as it was some 10 years ago, which is how I’ve seen a fascinating shift in the perception of ‘values’ and the role that the media/TV has had on twisting people’s ideas of ‘what they want to do with their lives’ and what they find as ‘cool’ or ‘uncool’ by imposing a ‘new’ morality that claims openness, sexual liberation and ‘independence’ but it’s all just a false idea of empowerment through antagonism – been there, done that, doesn’t work!

So this is why I then saw that everything I deemed as ‘uncool’ was in fact that which was in fact supportive: to be self-responsible, to be disciplined, to be non-antagonistic, to have a ‘clean’ presentation of oneself, to not be destructive, to not bash or blame others, etc. This included a very key aspect that had prevented me from realizing I could live the word ‘happiness’ in fact, because I had associated happiness with people being fully blind and not seeing reality, I deemed it as a dirty word that could only be used to define an ever elusive utopia that we were too far away from or impossible of ever creating even. I deemed that anyone that could call themselves ‘happy’ were absolutely disingenuous and blinded from reality. So it is in this judgment that I then prevented me from even considering looking at this word ‘happiness’ for myself, meaning investigating ‘who I was’ toward this world, how I could live it in a self-honest manner; I was in a way still holding on to the ‘image’ or ‘idea’ of myself as still ‘challenging the system’ and being cool in that, but in no way wanting to get to what I had defined as ‘being a positive thinker’ of sorts by talking about things like ‘being happy,’ or creating a ‘happy future for everyone’ lol.

 

 

 

All of these are just judgments and perceptions wherein I was in fact denying to myself being able to expand my living into seeing the word happiness and not link it to some nerdy-good-doer type of personality as my own mind construct, as my own past definitions that came through ‘judgments’ that I refused to be or become at others’ eyes. In fact now that I can speak about it and define me in the process of creating happiness within myself and my world, I no longer see something pulling out inside me as a ‘NOOO what the hell are you talking about!!?’ type of reluctant backchat that would come within me whenever anyone talked about ‘being happy’ or aiming at being happy in this world. A part of me really, really rejoiced experiencing and living in misery, gloom and doom which is a whole construct that I’ve been debunking throughout the years in this process, and along with that discovering what I was preventing me from acknowledging as part of my living potential, just because I had defined it as ‘uncool’ lol, and going ‘against my personality.’

What are personalities really but locks and cells wherein we believe we would ‘get out of character’ if we challenge such self-definitions and preferences and dare to think outside of our box – it’s really all a mind job wherein we hold on to ‘past definitions’ of who we are and in that we lock ourselves in one way or another from being able to fully embrace our living potential, which is not at all about being a ‘good person’ now instead of an ‘evil one,’ not at all –  it’s about recognizing words for the expression they are and can be when lived in self-honesty, and no longer about words that hold relationships to pictures, ideas, personalities or preferences as they exist in the world system.

 

In this, I realize that if we are to genuinely become the living word, we have to expunge ourselves from any limitation, any self-delimitation/definition that keeps us locked into a phoney idea of ‘who we are,’ which becomes a constricted character that is still defined by attitudes, behaviors, preferences, personality traits and so forth which are all part of the egos we believe we are. So it’s always a matter of asking oneself: what do I accept and allow to define me and my every moment in this world? What am I still holding on to with preventing me from living this word – such as ‘happiness’- as myself? Why had I defined this word as uncool and a pure sham? What am I missing out when dismissing living a world that is actually able to be lived and constructed in a self-honest manner?

Seems that self-sabotage is the only answer as to why we prevent us from digging out the corpses that prevent us from give ourselves a real blank-slate to create our lives, free from the past, I mean why would I want to hold on to an idea of ‘who I should be’? To be liked by ‘certain kinds of people’ only? Because I wanted to get along and ‘attract’ similar people – but would I then be even ‘attracting’ real and genuine people or only other similar characters that focus on getting along with similar characters in their lives to remain locked in the same characters forevermore?

Time to break the shell of one’s personality in all ways and challenge it further, and to me having to be speaking of solutions, focusing on looking at practical reality outcomes and how I can be a living example of doing this would have been like an ‘uncool’ thing to do in the past, because I was following the bashing/ rebelling trend, lol, not considering that I was really on my way to be a self-defined pariah that wanted to be special and ‘cool’ through abdicating all responsibility to myself and my world, because ‘oh it was ‘so cool’ to only bash the world and do nothing about it.’ ´

My suggestion is to watch out for this kind of thinking construct, even more so when this kind of ‘attitude’ is shaping lots of youngsters mindsets with ‘life mottos’ such as Y.O.L.O You Only Live Once and ‘living life on the fast lane,’ being the most ‘rebel’ and ‘darky’ and ‘antagonistic’ to precisely avoid youngsters genuine awareness of how they can contribute to creating life, a better future for all – and instead remain in an abysmal and gloomy outlook on life, because in that way you get discouraged from ‘doing something about it’ and so, it’s most profitable to seek ‘happiness’ or fulfillment through trends, drugs, partying and sex than doing anything genuinely supportive in one’s life.

And so, this is then a general self-awareness point wherein this ‘live fast, die young , don’t give a fuck about anything or anyone, do drugs, have sex with as many as you can and enjoy the rock and roll’ type of mentality is seen as ‘the ultimate cool’: It is not, and that’s why there’s such a vast amount of disarray and mental/physical problems in young adults that follow this ‘trends’ that actually start from TV, from so called ‘alternative books’ as well as it happened in my case.

 

Here’s an invitation to look at yourself, where is it that you are still a product of social-engineering brainwashing through the media and ‘culture’ in terms of personalities, likes-dislikes, preferences, the ‘type of people’ you’ve perceived yourself to be and all the points that go ‘against your character’ that you have refrained yourself from openly investigating. I would not have been able to get to this conclusion if I hadn’t walked the process of deconstructing ‘me’ as a personality and so link the dots to see why I had a slight reaction to even talk about ‘happiness’ before.

 

Life is not about becoming a character that seeks to be the ultimate cool and ‘rebellious,’ that’s the illusion of freedom SOLD as an EXPERIENCE.

Genuine and real freedom from mind control is to take responsibility for oneself, to actually not allow oneself to be brainwashed into ‘trends’ or following what the masses think is ‘cool’ which at the moment is ‘the masses think being a rebel is cool’ which is then of course not at all an actual ‘threat’ any longer, lol, it never has been! Think of the punk movement as being part of social engineering in Britain to exacerbate youngster’s addictions and dissociation from taking responsibility in their society, because drug addicts and an impaired society is more easy to control than healthy, self-aware and ‘unbrainwashable’ individuals, which is what we have to now focus on being and becoming – mind control is only possible if we accept it and allow it.

So, are you mind controlled?

 

Unhooking Past Definitions

 

Cool blog to read on re-approaching Happiness:

Why I First Resisted The Relationship of Happiness to Money – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 653

 

Oldie:

2012 Destonians Take Over the World: The New Culture of LIFE

 

Read people recognizing their self creation abilities – including the redefinition of happiness – in the 7 Year Journey to Life blogs

The Free Desteni I Process Lite course is a first platform of self-support to learn more about ourselves, our mind and understand how we can practically improve our potentials and skills.

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105. Having a Good Time is defined by MONEY

 

Self-Forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to condition my expression with another from the starting point of whether the sound of their voice, their body movements and general ‘beingness’ in the moment is oozing positivity, happiness and a general sense of enjoyment wherein I then mirror the person’s attitude in an instant manner, wherein I allowed myself to be subdued by the entire positivity experienced within another, becoming an instant character that accepts ‘the positive’ as something that should not even be questioned because: it’s good! It’s positive! Let’s have fun! And as such, not realize how I would go into the absolute opposite with the same being whenever the situation and event would be experienced with the negatively charged attitude, bodily movements and voice tonality wherein then I would mirror their self-experience in a way wherein I could only suppress myself and limit my self expression out of fear of someone’s negative experience.

 

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to create a positive experience out of a moment with my father wherein I can deduce and assess that ‘he’s had a cool day at work!’ because he is happy, which is the same as having money wherein then I choose to be happy as well as that means he won’t be in a bad mood/ angry toward everyone for not having a cool day at work. Within this, I see, realize and understand how I’ve come to mimic/ mirror another’s experience as my own and from that, create a starting point within myself of either positivity or negativity according to the person I’ll be interacting with presents themselves as, with either a positive or negative mood, within this defining an entire moment according to another’s experience, which was a common thing within me to limit myself by, wherein I would be cautious and careful to communicate within the consideration of another’s feelings and emotions in the moment, which means that I would always support their characterization by me becoming a supportive role in the play, and never taking a definitive stance to remain constant and consistent in my communication, but would instead become a mirror to others’ experiences as that would ensure that they remain in their characters and I remain as the ‘good person’ that will support their characters – whether they are positive or negative.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel excited and joyful about the idea of going out for dinner with my parents as that’s an indication that he’s got enough money to take us out and have a moment of what I defined as ‘fun,’ wherein I would then support the entire ‘good spirited’ situation/ moment by being equal to my father’s childish expression, which became a conditional aspect on whether he had enough money or not.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to never see how money would define my beingness as a mood situation as well, as when we were in severe financial trouble, I became more secluded, worried and anxious as a child and how things would change the moment that I knew we had enough money to have fun, go out, travel, which then became the polarized condition in my reality to either feel ‘good’ or ‘bad’ about life, never seeing how all and everything that I would do would be conditioned by the amount of money I had -through my father – or didn’t have, which is how my father’s mood and general stance would directly influence me and my stance due to the dependence that exists on a financial level toward him.

 

I realize that within a system wherein we are not supported equally from birth to death, children are conditioned to be dependent on their parents success/ failure to ‘make it’ within the world system of money, which is unacceptable as lives can be forever tainted if an unstable financial situation goes on at home, or there is no support at all at home which is why and how we currently live in a world wherein we have major problems on a ‘psychological level,’ simply because unconditional support is not given to all, hence survivalism leads to living an uncertain life wherein ‘who we are’ is dependent on having ‘good’ and ‘bad days’ that are defined according to the amount of money we have/ don’t have to live.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see how the entire starting point of ‘who I am’ in a moment can be absolutely determined by money as a positive experience or lack of money as negative experience wherein I can feel ‘content’ within myself because of, for example, my father having enough money to take us out for dinner, which I had defined as a treat and a luxury in terms of us not having had such moments in a long time in that moment in the past wherein a difficult financial situation was being faced at home.

 

I forgive myself that I ever accepted and allowed myself to start taking things for granted again when financial stability became a constant at home, forgetting how I had absolutely limited myself to a great extent when we had been through financial trouble, wherein I became more secluded, sad, dismal in my perspective toward the world as opposed to when I started seeing money again, which was the time when I then went on creating my own ‘problems’ in my mind as emotional and feeling situations, because money was no longer being a decisive factor for me to be either sad or happy any longer.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to ever feel ‘good’ and in ‘positive spirits’ whenever I was able to benefit from my father’s earned money at work, wherein I simply accepted ‘the positive’ as something that is certainly acceptable and normal to just give in as a ‘good moment,’ defining the entirety of ‘who I am’ according to the entire context of the moment: father being in a ‘good mod’= father having enough money to take us out for dinner = us having a good time all dependent on money itself.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel ‘good’ because of not having to feel guilty (wtf?) about me going to a restaurant and making my father spend money on me just because I know beforehand that he’s got money to pay for it – thus defining a good moment based on actually not having to be fearing or worrying about money in the moment, which indicates that such positive moments were never in fact real but only a counter-act to all the time that we would be in essence worrying about money and not having enough money to get our positive experiences such as going out for dinner on a Friday night.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to define the entire stance of me being ‘in good spirits’ and generally complying to the entire bubble context of ‘happy family because there’s money to go out’ without questioning it further, and just complying to define that as ‘fun,’ shoving away and deliberately hiding the thoughts that would come up in such moments such as ‘why can’t all people just be happy as we are in the moment, having enough money to go out?’ which were thoughts that would come up when and during the traffic lights on the way to the restaurant we would encounter people that were working at that time selling things, doing street juggling in order to make a living, wherein I would immediately shut off my thoughts about that and would go back into the ‘feel good’ experience that I was carrying myself with along with my family.

 

 

Self Corrective Statements:

When and as I see myself conditioning my entire expression based on the context of a ‘good spirited moment’ based on for example, having enough money to have a moment of enjoyment with others and becoming absolutely enthralled with it and full with ‘joy,’ I stop and I breathe – I realize that such experience is then not me being here breath, but me giving into the experiences that I am perceiving within others and assessing through the realization that we can be ‘happy’ because we have enough money to enjoy ourselves, as enjoyment within this current world system is equated to having enough money to buy something/ consume and as such equate it with a positive experience.

 

When and as I see myself adapting my communication, my ‘beingness’ in a moment into a positive spirit/ enjoyment and overzealousness in relation to spending a moment with others, I stop and I breathe – I realize that such positive experience was only created and emerged from the starting point of a good mood created by having enough money, which means that such enjoyment would not be possible without any money. Thus I stop defining ‘who I am’ in relation to being in a good mood or a bad mood in relation to the amount of money that I have, wherein money is able to buy a ‘positive experience’ or create a negative one if there’s not enough money to survive.

 

When and as I see myself in ‘good spirits’ when having a moment of enjoyment that is being bought with money, I stop and I breathe – I realize that these situations have been taken for granted just because we have money to do so, without seeing how not everyone in the world can have access to such ‘enjoyment’ as money is not readily given as s form of unconditional support to live, which would then make an experience of enjoyment almost impossible as there would be, for example, no more people that would have to work in a restaurant serving others in order to make money as they will be equally supported by themselves.

 

Life will change in a way wherein the things that we have currently taken for granted will no longer exist, as they are based upon the abuse of others in order to create enough hierarchical power to ensure that there are always those ‘below’ that can be abused in order to give a certain service/ work in exchange of money, which is a condition of enslavement that we have made ‘ok’ in our reality and justifying it with the words ‘they have to make a living somehow,’ but not being willing to see how our very own positive experience is stemming from others’ enslavement to ‘make a living’ as in making money in any way available within the current world system.

 

When and as I see myself creating a positive experience out of the memory of having felt ‘bad’/ negative experience in the same situation, I stop and I breathe – I realize that I am only going from one polarity to the other defining a moment based on memories and the ‘power’ that money currently has in order to buy good moments/ experiences and the opposite which is how we experience ourselves as depressed whenever there’s not enough money to buy/ consume positive experiences, which is how and why we require to equalize the ability for all to have a proper constant and continuous support, so that we can stop going from one pole to the other seeking for positive experiences because they will be readily available, wherein the have/ have not experience will no longer define who we are in our communication, in our beingness and relationship with others in our reality, as money will no longer be a factor to create either positive or negative experiences, but will become a constant source of support for all in equality.

 

When and as I see myself going into a positive experience when getting money, I stop and I breathe – I realize that this is a perceptual experience wherein the ‘positive attitude character’ is triggered, creating the illusion of having a ‘good moment’ that is only equated to ‘having enough money to live,’ which is how we have defined our beingness as being constantly seeking for the positive, the money and the ‘good times ‘ that are able to be bought with money, while trying to escape, prevent and avoid at all cost ending up in the other side of the coin as in having no money and as such, getting a negative experience out of it.

 

I commit myself to establish a monetary system wherein children and parents will be equally supported from birth to death, which implies that there will no longer be family conflicts in terms of a financial situation of lack being a definitive factor within the beings’ lives and everyday experience, wherein the lack of money creates a general hostile environment of ‘bad mood’/ anger/ frustration/ irritation that is then plundered onto the children, affecting children’s lives in a way that parents cannot yet fathom as they believe that children do not ‘care’ about such monetary conflicts, yet it does as everything that we do and how we function currently in this world is defined by and according to money – therefore with giving unconditional support to all beings, we ensure that children and parents are no longer having to suffer a lack of money defining their entire beingness and life experience, but instead make of life support a constant experience that is readily available for all, as that way we ensure that who we are is the expression itself of life that is here, always unconditionally existing here and that it is us human beings that now must establish a living-system on Earth wherein such unconditional support is extended in an organized manner, such as the Equal Money System to finally be able to focus our lives into an actual development of who we are as living beings on Earth – instead of defining our entire lives based on ‘education’ only to ‘make it’ within a system where everything we’ve done is and has been defined by money itself. This is how we can ensure that our every day living on Earth becomes an opportunity for self-expansion and genuine enjoyment, as there will be no need to create a separate moment of enjoyment according to having money to do so.

 

I realize that the moment I start taking my life for granted, I miss out on what is real and must then bring myself back here where I can definitely ensure that I am in fact considering how every single day that I am able to continue living is linked to my ability to have money, which is something that Not everyone on Earth has  – thus I commit myself to take responsibility for this fuckup as the world system that has deliberately marginalized those that have no money at all to live and how their lives cannot be ‘taken for granted’ as they haven’t been granted with the basic living rights to LIVE on Earth.

 

Hence any and all ‘good spirits’ moment is a cover up and make up illusion to the reality that is here, wherein any ‘good moment’ is actually a masquerade to cover the truth that is here, that is in no way something I can feel content about – thus any good moment experience is actually self-interest only and a point of separation from what is REAL.

 

Stand up and support the Equal Money System

For further support to realize and understand how the positive has been the key factor to the delusion we have created as ‘reality’ in this world, educate yourself at Desteni 

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Blogs:

 

Interviews to understand WHY the Positive must also be let go of:

 

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