Tag Archives: racism

626. The Freedom of Shared Responsibility

 

Here I share an update to my previous blog which will be my personal reflection and reading of a situation like this in the current world we are living in where social media has become in the individual press or medium of communication that enables us to create awareness of basically anything in our world, and at the same time consider the ‘greater scheme’ of how things that will emerge and will be coming through as scandals or online viperous content are also part of a very bumpy – yet necessary – ride to create further awareness of the effect that our actions have upon others, while also learning to discern what is truth and what isn’t based on facts and within that, learning to essentially stand in truth because nothing can distort that, because it is self-evident, and that’s essentially our real freedom, to own and take responsibility of our participation in the co-creation of reality and know ‘who we are’ within it all, so that one can then decide to change the ‘problematic’ actions and attitudes within myself  – that’s self-honesty to me.  

So, without giving too many details for obvious reasons, I was part of the conciliation process that took place in order to create a form of ‘justice’ to the person that felt aggravated by the actions of other people that were professionally involved with my partner. My partner faced his own ‘charges’ directly with the person that felt aggravated by him. To me it was quite an example of how one can be the living expression of ‘your truth sets you free’ because there was nothing to fear when you know exactly what you did, how you did it and the starting point of it. It took an apology to realize that his actions and words simply had an effect he had not considered could cause a negative reaction in the other person, and that was essentially about it. The whole ‘exacerbation’ of the situation essentially deflated when he decided to talk to the person face to face and clarify the situation. This involved the acknowledgement of making mistakes and how we can learn from it, how to change from now on.

The ability to come to an agreement exists when people are placed face to face to talk things out without having the ‘he/she said this/that’ over social media gossip only. The whole thing changes when you are there talking to the person that created a certain image of you online and start laying out the facts, recognize the mistakes, ask for forgiveness and move forward to create a peace arrangement, recognizing the responsibility on the ‘aggravator’ side in this case.

I personally tried to share the concept of shared responsibility where it always takes ‘two to tango’ in any situation, and how the person remained in such work relationship by their own choice. I was vehemently ‘shut down’ with my remark, because the whole set up was of having a victimhood and aggressor type of polarity in the conversation. This is one of those moments where I realized there was no opening to this kind of concepts when you have emotionally ‘enraged’ people and certain laws being used to treat a point of awareness of responsibility as ‘adding fuel to the fire.’ I had to keep quiet after that realizing I could stir up more conflict in a situation where conciliation was aimed to be made.

Here I’ll be sharing my perspectives on what I’ve observed not only first hand from this situation, but also in the context of what’s going on in the world in the realm of ‘political correctness’ and all of these attempts to ‘make people pay’ for past situations where people that felt aggravated didn’t speak up – or where people are currently taking offense much easier than before, where even now trying to make a simple joke can give you labels of the worst kind, where even mentioning a word has led people to lose their jobs as CEO’s of big corporations, comics have been kicked out of colleges for ‘telling the wrong jokes,’ and world leaders are being a constant source of internet bullying because of not providing a ‘politically correct’ view of people… and the list goes infamously on. That simply shows ‘where we are’ as humanity, that’s our current mirror.

I’ve mostly been observing and seeing what the ‘climate’ of all of these accusations, ‘revelations’ and ‘me too’ movements have created and have become. Each person has the ability to use their words and the media of their choice to say what they feel they ‘have a right’ to say. The problem is we don’t consider our responsibility in it all and the way that we affect each other, and at the same time how to learn and realize that no one can make you feel bad, feel less, feel down, feel offended unless one allows it or unless one ‘identifies’ with certain ‘label’ or word that may trigger an emotional reaction in us. That is part of this process as well where I’ve learned to see where and how I used to identify with certain judgments – essentially standing as Self-Judgment – and from there realize that any reaction I get from anyone ‘calling me that’ is simply because I accept and allow such word and a reaction to it to exist within me. I know it sounds difficult to do, but it’s work that’s worth doing for the sake of personal growth and change.

Currently writing or saying something about ‘taking responsibility’ on the side of the ‘offended’ one becomes outrageous in a climate like the one we are living ‘out there’ where people are deciding it’s quite easy to accuse and become a victim – and in that blindly supporting the victims – which is why the world is becoming the kind of ‘you said he said’ circus of misinformation and gossip that are dividing people more and more.

It seems ‘easier’ for some to not create any form of awareness of responsibility or perhaps not even deciding to consider it because it basically would destroy every single accusation or offense claim done, because one would realize ‘whatever I feel or experience from these words, I create within me, no one else can get inside my head to cause me to feel bad about it.’ But these seem to be still ‘superhero’ concepts as in them being ‘out of reach’ of any regular human being, when they are not, we are doing it as well in this process at Desteni. This doesn’t mean that some people may in fact want to inflict abuse, harm or extortion on others, that definitely does exist as well, but then it takes us to another reading, to understand how a person came to be the kind that would want to deliberately harm, abuse or vex others. That is also something that can be understood to take responsibility  – as in assisting to change it within self – and forgive it, not taking it personally and creating more problems about it. Sometimes simply talking to the person to know ‘who they are’ leads us to understand why they do certain things, and this also assists in realizing one cannot take personally others’ wrongdoings either. But this is also part of this process where one willingly decides to live the word Understanding, rather than going through the seemingly ‘easy’ path of blame and victimhood.  

So unless the person is devoid of all of their mental and physical capacity to think for themselves, every single person that stands in any form of victimhood needs to assess this first point of responsibility: how did I come to create, accept and allow this in my life and reality? What kind of steps, decisions and choices did I make to get to where I am currently? This is one of the main things that have made me a ‘freer’ person. I’ve written in countless blogs how I used to stand in blame towards every single human – hypothetically speaking – for ‘how fucked up we are as humanity’ and how I saw no way out other than completely ignoring the world – well, trying to – but ending up with a very pessimistic and nihilistic view about life and of any future for ourselves.  This led me to feel anger, resentment and feel completely disempowered to change anything, because I kept blaming the world system, ‘those in power,’ those that apparently made all the ‘wrong choices’ that affected my life and those around me.

Deciding to step outside of victimhood and blame is genuinely empowering and this was only possible due to studying the Eqafe.com material where I truly got to understand the ‘greater’ picture, and I mean ‘greater’ as in existential-level greater, where I got to grasp that any form of abuse is always Self-Abuse, because we are all in fact one and equal, and this is not in the nice and fluffy sense that some aspects of spirituality or religion portray, but this is at a matter level, where we are truly one and the same, we have just separated ourselves into oblivion, not only as individuals, but even within ourselves where we have our mind, our being and our body separated ‘within ourselves’ which is why we don’t realize what we were – and have been – doing ‘it’ to ourselves all along, which is self-evident now that we witness the truth and reality we are in.

Even though a lot of ‘shit’ seems to be hitting the fan, and cans of worms seem to be opening up everywhere – which is something we also knew would Have to happen in order for the old to go and the new to emerge – there are also great things happening in the realm of ‘waking up’ and taking more responsibility and creating more awareness of who we really are, and that’s also why some events are causing the scandals we are now seeing in the media or on social media every single day, people coming up with past stuff to blame people and in a way believe that it is that way to create any form of solution to the problems, when it is genuinely not and it is causing much more harm, violence, defamation and unnecessary paranoia around it. However all in all, it does serve as a point of awareness to the kind of abuses, harm, violations to life that exist which are things that have been kept ‘inside’ each person throughout human history.

We just now happen to have things like Facebook, Twitter and other places where each one can share themselves to whichever intent. But in all of such expressions of accusations, I haven’t yet read or seen one single person admitting to have placed themselves in such positions to be on the ‘receiving’ end of any form of abuse. And it is rare at the same time to find people that assume full responsibility for their aggravations without fear, understanding the situation and committing to change themselves for the best. I personally am fond of my partner for being one of them and serves as a great example of how things can be sorted with self responsibility, and how there’s nothing to fear when you know exactly ‘what you did’ and why you did it.

As a side note, it was also interesting to see how a publication with ‘scandalous’ content got shared thousands of times and commented on endlessly, while another publication with a signed agreement of conciliation of peace between the involved parties got only ‘a few likes’ and a few comments of approval. It does reveal a lot ‘where we are’ as a society and this has saddened some of my friends, but, I stick to the point of seeing the greater picture of not taking it personally but move on with the solutions as planned, because I know that falling into despair is just another outflow of reaction that leads nowhere but personal disempowerment, thus, we need to acknowledge, understand and move on standing clear on it, even being willing to support others that may be affected by similar situations which is something that I am open to do as well.

I initially also felt limited or ‘violated’ in my right to speak about shared responsibility in such conciliation process, because I was essentially told to ‘shut up’ or I could aggravate the situation. That’s a moment where I had to see my reaction coming up and decide to slow down and take one step back, breathe and realize that there are and possibly will be situations where the actual truth of the facts cannot be fully embraced or even mentioned, because there are factions that are completely entrenched in a sense of entitlement  that prevents them from hearing any form of common sensical approach to a situation such as where the two parts are considered as co-creators of a situation. It was baffling to me, but in that moment I realized that I could indeed do more harm than ‘good’ by trying to ‘create awareness’ about something that could destroy a ‘conciliatory’ process in the making. What I did instead after the whole more ‘serious’ part of the conciliatory process was done is to extend a hand of support for the person that was aggravated, to share how I do this as part of my living and how I am interested in people’s wellbeing regardless of anything. So that’s where I decided to stand in relation to ‘the other side’ for the sake of giving a name here, it was my way of living forgiveness in that simple moment as well.

This I share as well as a cautionary tale, where one needs to learn how to read the matrix so to speak, the context of the situation, the political and social ideas behind these kind of accusations, the laws and how the people on the victim-stance are expressing – such as if they are enraged, angry, nervous, etc. Because then it is my responsibility to know that saying something can ‘detonate’ them further on, so that’s where I have to take that step further and not step on my ‘high horse’ so to speak, which could have caused more conflict.  It is also well known that our current legal frameworks do not cater common sense or the consideration of shared responsibility. It is a polarized system where the only sense of ‘justice’ that exists is placing someone in jail or sending them to death penalty or asking them for money as a form of conciliation. That is of course only handling consequences….

But how about creating spaces to genuinely converse and admit the simple fact of ‘it takes two to tango’ and assist both or more parties to step outside of the disempowerment of victimhood and offender – that in fact attracts more dissent, polarization, violence and rage – and in doing so, assume a more responsible and wholesome stance where each person involved is assisted to recognize their participation in the co-creation of the situation, to understand the mental processes that led to the creation of ‘the problem’ and from there create a conciliatory process where one can understand the other and commit to a process of learning from the mistakes to change such habits, attitudes, actions or ways of being in order to prevent further mistakes and so further problems or accusations. That’s living forgiveness and that is not currently in any legal framework to my awareness.

In a way it is sad that one cannot say such things in the moment, because based on the situation where there’s almost like a victimhood standoff, it is almost impossible to hear any form of shared-responsibility concept. But there I said it, perhaps I planted a seed of awareness, perhaps not. But at least I didn’t keep quiet about it, couldn’t say all of what I’m writing here today and that’s also how I see the importance of using the tools we have of sharing ourselves, of creating blogs, sharing our perspectives within self-responsibility. Here I am making the best that I can to ensure that my words stand as a perspective that is geared to support ourselves as human beings – not taking any sides here – to face conflict, to prevent conflict, to handle conflictive situations in a way that can honor each other and ultimately life itself.

This is how I see we need tools of support at a legal level so that the labels of ‘the victim’ and the ‘perpetrator’ are removed for a moment to look at where each one stands and how the situation came to be, so that there is an awareness creation of each other’s participation in the event, and so create a mutual process of real reformation if you will, which doesn’t come with a sense of vengeance or punishment or ‘compensation for the damage done’, but in the intent of actual change and restoration of the individual, for any ‘other’ is also ‘us’ that have gone astray in one way or another, they are also the product and result of the whole society/world we have co-created.

And this is why blame is lame as they say, it prevents us from acknowledging that we have all created the world as is, we have all been co-creators all the way, we have just blindly and comfortably forgotten, and that is what’s currently being used with greater force in certain factions or groups that create an identity point based sexual preferences, gender, race, nationality, ideology, political inclinations, religions, all kinds of paraphilias and the list goes unfortunately on, missing out the fact of how any form of label/tag divides and conquers us further. It truly saddens me to see how we have separated ourselves from the basic humanity that we all are, devoid of creeds, beliefs, postures, colors, dogmas. It is indeed sad undoubtedly how much ‘shit’ we can talk about one another, how easily we can attack and blame and not even care to investigate the facts. I’ve been there myself as well and can’t claim innocence at all in the past, but I’ve been committing myself to change that within this process for the past 11 years. Sometimes learning the tough way is what we need, a huge ‘wake up call’ to see how we are participating with each other person in this world.

At the time, it seems things are ‘getting out of hand’ in the world where virtually any wrong word may get you on the spotlight and be labeled as the worst of the worst…. We are on a learning curve as well on how to best make use of this current notion of ‘free speech’ and the ability we have to publish whatever we want. I believe it is only our truth that can set us free, and that truth doesn’t mean always doing things ‘right’ or ‘correctly,’ but it also means being able to stand in the front of the person and the totality of the world and explain ourselves, recognize the facts, the context, explain the wrongdoings and commit to change, to live forgiveness, for that is a far more valuable act and a much less ‘explosive’ than going through social media asking for revenge or simple slander to defame others and causing multiple effects that at times we have no consideration for, because we see it as ‘part of the consequences,’ but I see it now as another source of conflict even for people that haven’t been personally involved in the events.

This is also another rather ‘disastrous’ process that sure, can break us further apart, but in the cases that we do care to assist each other to ‘open eyes,’ we can take the time to share our perspectives on a controversial topic or situation like this to present a more common sensical approach to things, to learn to read things properly, to not take immediate ‘sides’ to a story and to formulate a personal stance in relation to all things that we may become aware of in the world. Doing this can in fact make us grow as humanity, but remaining divided – and so conquered – only adds up to the plethora of problems we have to sort out.

Based on the situation I explained in my previous blog, I became aware of people that came in contact with the information and created a conflict with one another for not agreeing on how things were taken by each. This is also part of seeing each others’ ‘truth’ if you will, it will disrupt the way that we believed we liked or agreed with each other to reveal the truth of who we are and yes, that’s part of discovering self-honesty too, it is not nice, it is not pretty, it will be something quite radical and may seem polarizing and disruptive, but it’s part of the necessary ‘opening’ of the cans of worms as I see it, where only – once again – one’s truth will set ourselves free. Actually if one stands clear within oneself, there is nothing to fear, and this is the way to debunk any claims of wrongdoings that one is certain one hasn’t done. IF one has, then, sure, there we go! It sure is time to step up and assume responsibility and commit to changing what one has done and focus on how to stop recreating the same in the present and in the future, because it is what’s best for all, it will prevent further harm, abuse or offense towards others.

Something that I also see is happening is a sense of false empowerment when accusing others, and this is also something that can only happen if there’s no acknowledgement of shared responsibility.  I’ve been there and done that in the past as well where, as I’ve shared countless of times in this blog throughout the past years how I used to ‘rejoice’ in speaking shit – sorry but that’s what it is – about governments, and the ‘elites’ I thought were to blame for everything going wrong in this world, about religious leaders and organized religions, and basically anyone else I judged as evil and wrong in my previous mindset, the one I had before starting this process of self-awareness with Desteni and the mindset I AM still working with whenever it rears its head within me day to day.

I cannot be any more grateful for the ability that I have now to recognize my co-creation and co-responsibility in the creation of this world, our lives, our bodies as they are. It has assisted me to change the very fiber of my being that used to stand in that sense of ‘entitlement’ to feel like a victim, believing I was ‘empowering’ myself by pointing fingers at others, never realizing that in blame and in that position of victimhood I was in fact the most disempowered, I actually felt the most miserable because I thought that punishment and ‘bringing others down’ was the only way to create any restoration of justice. I was in fact recreating the same problems I was complaining about in this world, I was wishing ‘the end’ of those I believed to be the problem. I never realizing I was ‘digging my own grave’ as they say here, I was doing it all to myself.

Walking the Desteni process and the Eqafe self-support material have enabled me to recognize the actual obstacle that blame and victimhood are, and so rather realize the potential and the actual power/capacity I have to focus on changing me, in stopping blaming others and feeling like a victim, to owning my thoughts, words and deeds, to be willing to recognize my participation in the ‘fucked up’ reality we live in and realize that the one true power I hold is to change ME, and that seeking revenge or ‘justice’ as punishment would truly get us nowhere as humanity but further down the downward spiral.

I have realized that I have to be the change, and stop focusing on pointing fingers at others, because that was causing more harm in my body, it was in fact like an ‘anger’ sickness that made me depressed and hopeless and yes, it has taken quite some time to change it, but every single moment I decide to stand in understanding of a situation within this consideration of who we are in our minds, the consequences we’ve created as a society, the role that each one of us has in creating the outflows we face and no longer taking a unilateral approach to things that I face in my life has been like healing a long lasting ‘wound’ of ‘feeling empowered’ when blaming others and believing that ‘that was the solution.’

Again, it’s not, but it also takes courage and a process to stand in self-honesty, to dare to see who we are, who we have become, to own our choices and decisions made that have taken us to walk through every single aspect of our lives, no matter how ‘fortuitous’ they may seem, if we are experiencing them, then we can own our responsibility in it, which simply means to respond, to own our actions, to be aware of the situations we might possibly create if we act or speak certain words – and to always consider what is best for all involved, to learn to do others as we would like to be done onto, to consider ‘the other’ as myself.

These are key principles that even in the face of moments where I believe that I am being ‘limited’ in my expression about something I believe ‘makes sense and is right’, assist me to take the ‘next step’ which is to read the situation in its current stance, to understand that some people are not yet at that position where they can be willing themselves to understand co-creation yet, to consider that for some people might take longer to understand a more holistic approach to any form of problem creation. To consider as well how blinded we can become by our own emotions or characters we take on that we believe empower us, and can’t see the reality of how they are in fact disempowering us.  Within such understanding of ‘where each other is at’ in their lives, it makes it easier to let go of wanting someone to understand something that they simply might not be ready or willing to acknowledge yet, and that’s where I remind myself of my only true power as well: to be an example of how to best handle the situations, how to stand in the face of conflict, how to take responsibility but not ‘enforce’ change or certain ways on others.

Here is also where trusting myself and trusting life comes in. At times I’ve seen how I can be quite pushy in wanting others to understand something that I see ‘benefits them/everyone involved’ and how this can cause further reactions and realize that such reactions are an indication that there is no ‘opening’ yet in the other person to see what I am seeing/saying. It also might mean that I’m ‘reading’ the situation completely wrong and that I need my own words and actions to be cross-referenced, because they can be in fact out of place and not clear. The reactions also allow me to read ‘where a person is at’ and also see myself in it, to see what still ‘disturbs me’ so that I can work with it and in so, seeing what I haven’t yet forgiven as my own experience, as my own creation. Doing that enables me to ‘move’ as in speak, act, direct accordingly.

I’ve met people in my life, including one of the persons that I’m grateful for has created the opportunity to create this moment of conciliation, that in an almost instant manner we could see that we were ‘on the same page’ so to speak in the reading of the events and the greater scheme of how these things are going on in the world.  This is actually quite cool because! It gives me hope in humanity to find people like that. I can also say this of a person that I met in the most seemingly fortuitous situation and eventually realized how ‘aligned’ we are in order to work together in a project and basically be on the same page about how we view ourselves, our lives and the potential we see in people. That is also another example of how upon communicating and learning to ‘read’ people through their responses I’ve been able to establish relationships with people that I know ‘are there’ in this world and are doing ‘their thing’ and in their own way yet within the same principles.

That’s comforting because, as crazy as it may seem, it is hard at times to walk this process at the level we do within Desteni and at times one feels a bit isolated, as if ‘no one else’ could see and understand things the way we do. Thus it has been comforting to find people that do see life/things in a very similar way and how it IS possible to create that understanding and common ground no matter what their ‘background’ is; it’s a confirmation that life and living principles stand on their own, no matter what ‘road’ you take to get to them, and that’s awesome and it is actually cool to know people like that outside of the group that I know and am aware of are people walking this same process with me – even if living in very distant countries. I am also glad that ‘they are here’ and walking with, even if not ‘in my environment’ at the moment, but always ‘there’ in the virtual world, which is something I am also very grateful for in times that may seem difficult and we need to reach out for support.

Ultimately what matters to me is to go establishing connections with the people that do care, that have eyes, ears and a body ready for the new living reality that we need to co-create, and this is something that ‘comes to the surface’ even from ‘unfortunate’ or bitter events like this one.

I share this because it is also a comforting point for me, to know that besides what may seem like ‘the worst of the words’ surfacing on our ‘daily feeds’ and knocking at our doors, there is something actually way extraordinary to be living for. For me it is a way to keep connecting and meeting people that are taking these steps ‘forward’ in their life, while it also reminds me of the necessity that I have to keep sharing, to not ‘back down’ and become a silent vigilant of the things that are going on in this world.

To sum up, as ‘atrocious’ as it may seem for many, these cans of worms are here for a reason and they sure may lead to temporary conflict and polarizations, but eventually out of all crisis there comes an opportunity for recreation, reinvention, and reconstruction – this is what I’m here for. To learn how to stand in the eye of the storms, to strengthen my resolve, to know that my truth will set me free, to be grateful for those that I can relate to and know that are also ‘here’ on track with the new path for life in this world of which I have vehemently decided to be a part of, because my intent has always been to ‘change the world,’ and from there I went from being ‘angry’ at the world for not changing and blaming everything and everyone around me – lol – to externalizing that eagerness to see ‘world changes out there’ to now internalizing, focusing on my own self-change which start in how to handle situations like this and then spreading some seeds again with others that may be ready to read and listen and share back how they see things themselves.

Once again I would not have this kind of resolve or ‘greater picture’ approach without the support of all things related to Desteni and the Eqafe Eqafe self-supportive material, which I have now integrated in my own skin as a new way to live and approach life. It also allows me to understand the greater ‘cataclysms’ that are taking place and ‘will’ most likely continue to take place in this world where everything will seem really ‘bad’ and consequential and chaotic, but here is where I remind myself and anyone else reading: there’s more to it than what meets the eye.

The best thing to do is to create Understanding, to not take things personal, to not only ‘react’ emotionally to things, to learn to discern, to learn to look back within ourselves and making an informed decision of where we stand about something before ‘spewing’ words about something or someone. To learn to let go and forgive people and situations where one can see that it’s only consequences playing out that one cannot immediately change and can only conciliate in the ‘best way’ that is doable in certain contexts.

What matters, as I said in my previous blog, is who we are in the face of conflict, in the face of admitting our faults, mistakes, falls, it is about learning to forgive ourselves and at times assisting others to do that for themselves if this is not yet considered as part of the solution, which is not limited to simply forgiving and letting go, but comes hand in hand with the commitment to change, to grow, to develop new ways of being now that one sees that the ‘previous ways’ were causing harm or detrimental effects on others. This is to me the real way to create peace, calm and conciliation.

This is our learning curve at the moment, it may seem out of hand, it may seem extreme, but again: owning one’s deeds, taking responsibility, learning to assume the co-creation roles we have in this reality and live the correction of the problematic actions will set us free and will benefit each other substantially. That’s real change, that’s real responsibility to me and that’s a supportive use of moments of conflict, problems and crisis, to be of support in those moments to walk through them the best way that we can, for ourselves and for all parties involved.

Thanks for reading

 

And! Happy new year! Enrich your life with signing up to the Unlimited Eqafe plan here: https://eqafe.com/unlimited_plan also available in Spanish Sonrisa

 

And once you’re in, you can access these awesome recordings from which I got the concept of shared responsibility here:

 

 

Can you be trusted with life

 

Videos by Sunette Spies for Self and Living:
Gossip and Personal Pains
From Judgment to Nonjudgment
From Judgment to Understanding

 

Join in if you want to start walking your own process of defining your Self-Honesty

Advertisements

492. We Are All The Wall

Or how to stop the wars about walls and rather focus on taking responsibility for the source of the problems that cause them to exist.

A few people have sent me information and documents as well as asked for my personal perspective on what’s my perspective as a Mexican – living in Mexico – on Trump’s executive order to ‘Build the wall’ that he promised to all of his supporters during his electoral campaign, therefore I’ll share some of my points of view here.

First of all, I’ve shared in previous blogs about my decision to not bash other people in positions of power such as presidents (Read Let’s Make Us Focus .On .Our .Lives. Again!) and I’ve lived up to that point with both my country’s president – and actually have had a few words with people that constantly bash him and make of his bashing a form of national sport – as well as with the new ‘human piñata’ for Mexicans, which is Donald Trump where now Mexicans have interestingly enough gathered around in this 4-day old renewed sense of Nationalism that started emerging in people’s phones and social media participation based on now having something/someone to fight and stand united against and that is the perception of Trump’s wall as a discredit to Mexicans, a bashing of Mexicans – which Mexicans have taken personally now reacting in this sudden ‘solidarity’ which I would have very much liked to see during the first week of this year in course where we were all more divided and against each other than ever, with all the lootings, protests against government and by the government… but now it’s as if Trump’s Wall has become a reason for Mexicans to unite, though for only all the nice-sounding reasons, but still failing to acknowledge the responsibility to look back at the collective mess we’ve created as our country, which is predictable considering that us as human beings like to focus on all the nice things but always react to and resist to look at ‘all the bad’ stuff, the ugly and very real aspect of our truth and reality – individually and collectively as the world system.

What do I mean with this?

As a disclaimer and allocating myself in what I’m about to share. Throughout this process I’ve learned to identify myself as a human being in this world, not as a ‘Mexican’ which means I have throughout my life walked a process to dissociate myself from the constructs, beliefs, main views or cultural associations of what a Mexican is supposed to be like. This is not to set myself apart, but this is exactly the same self-deconstruction that I would do living anywhere else in the world, where I’ve come to understand all notions of nationality and its ramifications like patriotism or nationalism which I equate in the same way as racism, religious ideologies or political inclinations that create a division between people. All of these ‘labels’ stand for and as separation between human beings, therefore the identification of myself as one single ‘nation’ to me would be a disservice to the principles I am standing for/as which are that of oneness and equality, who we really are as life beyond our characters, our personalities, our cultural (mental) biases and the rest of the opinions that we’ve transformed into religious-political factions that we’ve turned into ways to separate and conquer us.

I share this bit so that I leave it clear that by now it should not be expected that I will take any ‘side’ with anyone here –  otherwise I would be recreating the problems that we all precisely should be focus on stopping in this world: the continuous ‘siding with’ groups/nations/identities that invariably create friction and conflict among each other, where we lose track of how we are ALL collectively creating all the problems in the world that we are at the same time constantly fighting and complaining to resolve – yes, paradoxical in nature, but we haven’t yet realized how we are creating the very world we live in based on each word in the nature of fighting and spite that we’ve accepted as part of who we are in our lives.

So, what I see from the creation of the wall is nothing else but a way to contain a consequence that interestingly enough, most of Mexicans currently united in a sentiment of ‘renewed nationalism’ have failed to have the common sense to admit and look at, to rather question HOW we’ve come to this point where someone has to create a wall, a physical border to prevent more people from going illegally to the US and WHY it is that so many millions have decided to leave Mexico in order to have a better lifestyle than here. This has been an all-timer question that I’ve heard many people blame since the nineties to the NAFTA, but immigration has been going on way before that which is quite obvious in the sense that people would see it as a very easy thing to do to have the same kind of jobs they would have here in Mexico yet getting paid a whole lot more for it if opting for the American Dream, which is also a misnomer because there’s millions of stories of suffering and abuse as well, and I won’t go into that because there’s thousands of articles and documentaries on this situation as well. Therefore it’s not like it’s all rosy and nice in there, even more so there’s several accounts of many succumbing to or resorting to become criminals to make a living, which is also not acceptable. I’ve personally met several people lately that have come back since it wasn’t such a great deal for them anymore to be living in the US and are instead having decent jobs here, which I find cool since they went there and lived ‘their dreams’ only to realize the kind of values that opting for the ‘life of the riches’ lead you to – which in any case is a life lesson and interesting process for many of us humans that tend to only look at money as the whole drive of one’s existence.

Now, I don’t blame people from following such aspiration to have more money than they would in Mexico, but it is certain that in all of those millions that have left the country, the workforce that could have instead stayed here to build a prosperous country in various forms/ways have gone to take menial jobs to ‘the other side’ as we call it here. So, what happened is that only money came back here to Mexico, but most males in little towns in this country would leave to the US, leaving huge gaps in communities across the country as a result of this, creating a ‘norm’ for many youngsters to only be waiting to be old enough to be able to go to ‘the other side’ and make a lot more money than here, which means: we failed as a society to create an economy that gives opportunity to everyone to have a dignified living.

So, it’s quite ludicrous to consider that Mexicans or Mexican Government can get offended about the creation of a wall as a way to stop a consequential outflow of decades and decades of complete negligence to create sufficient economic stability and incentives to make people stay and instead use people’s labor and dedication to rebuild communities, especially in agriculture, to create more associations that could in one way or another sort out agreements with governments in order to prevent the mass immigration to the US and also strengthening the Mexican economy that will now be probably more affected by this bilateral disagreement going on between the US and Mexico, turning it into yet another unfriendly stance that is in no way something supportive to have between neighbors, especially considering it is ‘THE’ United States of America on the north side, so, we have to own our creation: we did it to ourselves, bit by bit.

Therefore, I am not at all in disagreement nor in favor of the wall either – again, won’t take sides and refuse to do so because that is what keeps this ‘battle’ going on without solutions.

The last thing I can do here is share this perspective and suggest a few things to everyone in Mexico or outside of it that may be standing with an interesting ‘fervor’ to ‘save Mexico’ and ‘stand united with Mexico’ or ‘be offended along with Mexicans’ to rather stop the sudden nationalism and realize that we should have done this a LONG time ago in the sense of actually deciding to build this country back on its feet and become the people that can stand as individual leaders – all together – with transparency, honesty and integrity which means Everyone, as ALL citizens would have to live by and stand by these principles, as well as in self-responsibility. Because we have been masters at pointing out corruption, being OK with corruption at all levels of our societies and being the first in line to mock presidents and create jokes out of any corruption- or narco-case gone wrong – I was once there, I did that many times, but I can stand my word. I don’t indulge into that at all any longer.

Therefore I’d rather ask: how many of us are actually looking within ourselves to recognize our responsibility to the creation of all the problems faced in this country and whether we would stand also ‘In Equality’ within self-honesty and self-responsibility to own and recognize our creation, to acknowledge the fact that we’ve all built this wall by accepting and allowing our economy to be not good enough to cater for proper livelihoods in the lives of those people that were the most hardworking, noble and wise when it comes to an essential field of our economy: agriculture. We’ve shot ourselves in the foot, therefore we have to stop the tantrums and why-me/whining at a national level.

As with all things, the only solution I foresee now that this deal of the wall is done is to use it as a lesson to learn from and prevent from creating further consequences from now on. I don’t disagree that people create a sense of unity, but for god’s sake, let’s make it about ourselves, who we are as people – not about ‘Mexican beauties’ like its beaches, best weather and landscapes in the world – but about who we are as individuals, the kind of relationships that we can create in our families, with friends, at work, at our jobs. Becoming honest and integral individuals where we can again trust each other to act responsibly, to do ‘the right thing, that which is best for all’ and to not cheat and do whatever we can to bribe our way to the top.

In this it’s about applying the same as we do with our personal process: it’s about facing consequences and learning to live them the best way possible, making of the consequence a learning process where we can strengthen our strengths and weaknesses while also making sure that we go correcting our core values wherein we can once and for all be a little bit more considerate in terms of ‘following an American Dream’ and whether that was in any way sustainable as a long-time aspiration or desire for generations of humans to come. My take is: it is not. And here I clarify that it is not that I am not wanting prosperity for the people, but I am talking in the specific means in which massive amounts of people have gone to the US to get ‘rich’ or ‘lots of money’ while having to leave their families back here in Mexico, it’s not nice for them nor for the families, most of them would really want to be back here yet we all have been the ones that instead of staying in this country to make it stronger and built with an intent to revive its economy and therefore the living-quality in it, we have opted to run away from it or live off from its worst sources of income like politics or narco-business – we haven’t yet decided to create an economy that can fulfill people’s livelihoods in a best-for-all manner, hence the consequences.

It’s time to see beyond the sentiment of nationalism or ‘uniting against the enemy Trump’ because that breeds more of that which we need to STOP fueling and participating on in this world: hatred, anger, separation, blame, vengeance, racism. I refuse to be part of the millions that rejoice in a false sense of empowerment – instead I decide to remind ourselves of common sense: let’s own our consequences, let’s understand the source and origin of this ‘wall’ which is that of massive immigration that we haven’t been able to prevent by creating a solid economy at home.

So, if we really want to ‘be very Mexicans’ I’d first say, let’s stand in principles that change the nature of what we’ve all become as individuals, starting with stopping the hate, the fight, the spite towards presidents or nations ‘out there’ and instead focus on ourselves, focus on our own lives. There’s nothing to be offended about when we are ALL the creators of walls, because it represents nothing else but the manifestation of our separation as our inability to stand together to create a dignified livelihood for all inhabitants in this world – not only Mexico but everywhere else in this world.

Let’s keep this in mind when seeing the word ‘WALL’ = We ALL Are the WALL – now let’s start breaking down our own inner and outer wars and let’s rather focus on understanding our creation, looking at the origin of the problems and so focus on solutions to sort them out from their root, that’s what we should focus on in our lives right now.

Thanks for reading

 

 The Wall - Mexican Border - Trump - Mexicanism

 

 

Join us in our process of Self-Responsibility as LIFE


414. Solution to Ferguson: Learn Self-Forgiveness

 

clip_image001

A fascinating point opened up as I was watching CNN. Yes I tend to criticize CNN quite a bit for the false information and scare they provoke, but as I was cooking last night and turned it on to see what kind of ‘disinfo’ they were sharing, a female TV show host was being interviewed about Ferguson and the words ‘Forgiveness in Ferguson’ were on the headlines of the news section and as I seek for such info on the net, I found yet another reverend that talks about Forgiveness required to get to a solution. What’s interesting about the woman speaking about Forgiveness is that beyond the usual ‘being able to forgive another,’ she explained there is forgiveness to apply to ourselves, which is another way of saying: we require to apply Self-Forgiveness for what we have accepted and allowed – almost her words there.

 

clip_image002

 

What do we have to Self-Forgive here? Upon witnessing the current ‘rioting’ and looting and anger that people in Ferguson experience, what we have to do as humanity is realize that this violence, this sense of ‘being violated’ will get us nowhere, because what we are witnessing is only the outflow of our entire history of abuse, disregard, violence and harm we have imposed toward each other, our environment, we have essentially violated our right to life by complying to, accepting and allowing ‘the way the world works’ as this current dog-eat-dog functioning of the system in a blind manner. This world-system – our laws, our institutions, our governments, our fears, our paranoia, our media, our scares, our injustice – is our collective creation, this is what we have to begin to self-forgive here first because as long as we continue to see ‘perpetrators’ and ‘culprits’ outside of ourselves, the fight, the reclaiming of ‘justice’ will continue without any sense of self-responsibility, which is the rather uncomfortable truth: any act of abuse is not done by ‘others’ but it’s always what we have collectively co-created by having abdicated our participation and decision making processes to decide what is best for all.

The fact that the word ‘Forgiveness’ is pointed out in our MSM (Mainstream-media) as something that is required to solve the problem, should not be taken for granted: it is one step further to understand that we have to step down from our righteousness, our ‘victimized self’ that we climb upon as our mind-horse where we take ‘the abused’ position to ‘ask for justice’ without first focusing on seeing and coming to realize how it is that all the problems we are facing is our collective consequence of having Never actually having cared to review the laws, the agreements, the money systems, the general structures by which we organize and live as a society, which would then of course lead us to see why do we have to create all of these laws and live in constant fear of one another, protecting our ‘right to defend ourselves’ from other potential ‘wrong doers’ or criminals, instead of creating a world system that can benefit everyone and so naturally create peace by doing so?

What we have missed is that the real problem exists within our own minds, within our desire to blame something or someone for any form of abuse, instead of seeing how no justice, no equality, no support or real care has ever existed toward one another as living beings because: We Haven’t Created it, We Haven’t Lived such words ourselves in the first place! All that has ever existed is the war mentality, the selfish nature of only caring for our own wellbeing and not even giving a thought about others’ lives.

How can we ‘demand’ something like Respect when we haven’t ever really lived SELF-Respect such as ensuring that one is not accepting and allowing any form of abuse, harm, diminishment or counterproductive actions that prevent us from living to our fullest potential, individually – so, how can we as individuals feel ‘violated by others’ when we have never cultivated this basic point of self-support as self-respect?

 

clip_image003

 

How can we ask for ‘Justice’ toward some authorities and institutions that we created based on our inherent belief of being unable to direct ourselves and take responsibility for ourselves within the consideration of what is best for all, to create and structure our entire economic, political and social system within such principled living considerations: considering everyone’s wellbeing, supporting everyone to live in dignity, to create a sense of community and solidarity that leads to a well-functioning society… none of these aspects have been our starting point as human beings to coexist in. Even if these ‘rights’ are written in constitutions, on paper they look really nice, but when it comes to living such words and agreements: we have all considerably failed to do so because we have ultimately abdicated our responsibility to live such principles ourselves, individually, which leads to outcomes such as wars and any other form of brutality imposed by our designated ‘authorities’ to create a sense of ‘order and control,’ organisms and institutions that exist as an outflow of us believing that it is more important to impose punishment and be constantly spied on for a sense of security rather than focusing on providing everyone a general good living standard so that the ‘anomalies’ of the system are reduced to genuine mental problems – not ‘criminality’ as theft due to the necessity to get money to live in basic dignity. This is what we have co-created as our social injustice.

This is why, the more we face consequences that shook the foundation of our so-called ‘stability’ or disrupt our belief that ‘everything is generally fine,’ the more we have to start considering that the solution resides within each one of us. It is awaiting to be ‘awakened’ as a sense of self-responsibility to first Live in each one of us such as Self-Respect, to Take Self Responsibility for what we have co-created as our world and so be Willing to Work Together for solutions, to no longer depend on institutions/authorities that are there to ‘calm the waters’ based on imposition of force or further punishment toward those that have resorted to violence or crime because that’s all we have ever learned as human beings to do in moments of distress, fear and desperation to ‘get an answer’ – once again, just because we haven’t learned how to become and implement solutions that benefit everyone, which is absolutely possible for us to do.

 

Free Yourself - Copy

 

The solution begins within self: not giving into fear, helplessness, hopelessness, rioting, protesting or ‘demanding’ answers from those ‘authorities’ we have placed in such positions because we have rendered ourselves as useless or incapable of solving our own problems – it’s about time we begin to Self-Forgive our perceived victimization on these events, to self-forgive the accepted and allowed abuse we have co-created as our ‘world system’ and how we treat each other as criminals, as potential enemies, as a ‘problem’ instead of facing our own problem inside ourselves: to face and self-forgive our paranoia toward each other, to face and self-forgive our fears, to face and self-forgive our belief of being incapable of changing things – we have to self-forgive all of the ideas, beliefs and perceptions we have about the problems that are going on in this world, to not call out on the perceived ‘culprits’ but to stand up in the realization that: we did this to ourselves, this is our creation and only through allowing us to self-forgive this massive abdication of self-responsibility will we ever come to a general agreement that the solution resides within each one of us: to learn how to Live Self-Respect, to Live Solidarity and learning how to Live by Principles which will prevent us from having to ‘punish’ others as a way to solve problems that are fully preventable if we so agree and decide to create a world system that can benefit everyone’s lives, because that is what we all want for ourselves anyways, isn’t it?

 

The solution is not further police intervention, no further ‘presidential intervention’ or curfews…

 

Time to focus on the solutions, on Self-Forgiveness as a first way to recognize our complicity and Self-Responsibility in all problems in the world right now and so creating a culture of becoming and providing Solutions instead of continuing existing in indignation, victimization and the perception of being powerless to change things.

The time is now, we have only one life to do this – so let’s stand up as examples of what we can be and become when we integrate self-responsibility in our lives and expanding this sense of awareness toward others in our everyday living.

 

Listen to this Podcast on Mixlr:

 

What’s MISSED ABOUT FERGUSON AND ALL ‘BAD NEWS’ IN THE WORLD

 

 leavenoonebehind

Investigate the Living Income Guaranteed Proposal

 

Learn how to become the solution in this world:

 


‘Born Free’–Warfare on your MTV– Day 19

I watched this video by M.I.A Born Free when it came out almost two years ago after I had spent one year ‘out of the matrix’ and Lady Gaga was only a repeated image I would glance at magazines while paying for groceries at Pick & Pay and mainstream music was only background music for shopping. I didn’t write at the time about the experience that it was coming back into the world and finding videos like this one or the ‘Pursuit of Happiness’ of which I made a reference about in a vlog I made, simply because it seemed like the age of cynicism had arrived and ‘made cool for everyone.’


I was a music video sucker-fan – the 90’s era – so I grew up watching MTV at the time where desolated kids with whining grungy guitars, passive-aggressive style, shoe gazers and violent femmes taking the stage – then it got a bit more ‘pumped up’ when electronica and some other genres started emerging,  then I lost all interest on it and eventually stopped watching that. I mean, I’ve watched a great amount of videos as I spent like over 10 years of my life being really stuck at it, and I had not seen anything similar to M.I.A’s  ‘Born Free’ video – hence the  ‘special mention’ here. I must clarify I have been fairly disconnected about the ‘new stuff’ and video making and marketing lately, yet the stuff that I have seen lately is entirely driven by sex, big eyes, pink-pop plastic all over and zingy sounds that make you cringe out of the obvious repetition.


I am aware you could watch these images in any R-Rated movie or even PG-13 these days, I’m not really aware of the levels of violence they allow for a 13 year old now considering the video games they and younger kids play. However, the point is that such message/ level of violence for an intended MTV hit is rather chocking considering the various topics it depicts with the obvious title which is quite a cool way to mock the state of any country in this world wherein our constitutions claim ‘all men are created equal and free’ yet living the exact same opposite.


We are still living under tyrant systems that we have created, accepted and allowed as humanity, always ‘at war,’ and it seems to me that this piece of what could be labeled as motion shock art is the depiction of the same desensitizing process that has been ongoing as violence, war, abuse and national home-security policies are made part of your primetime regular cable TV programming.


See, the point to look at here is how this message might be interpreted by the viewer. To me within a ‘critical perspective,’  it is an allusion to the obvious stupidity that war represents wherein a group is targeted only by a particular skin color, religion, culture, haunting them down and waging war against them until all fall down – yes ‘Ring around the Rosie’ was not exactly a ‘bright’ theme for a nursery rhyme – yet the point is still being missed here for a real exposure than the obvious violence that war produces: M-O-N-E-Y.


M.I.A. seems to also just make videos and music for the sake of money – here’s another one of her videos Paper Planes which is a rather catchy tune where you can only hear the chorus with gun shots and cashier register sounds to find out what it’s all about while repeating  ‘All I wanna do is (afore mentioned sounds)  and Take your Money!’ Therefore, what’s missing here is the Actual important message which is: the acceptance of war as a way to regenerate economy = war is all about money and so is M.I.A. apparently.


Does the end justify the means?

Now, this writing is not to create the usual discord used in any criticism toward society – this is just dissecting a bit of our reality to do some critical thinking – out of our box – and realizing what the hell we are watching on TV and what the hell is most likely to become a ‘jingle’ in a child’s ear. It’s already enough for me having to see how difficult it is to trade some hide and seek game in order to stop having kids playing with toy guns pretending to kill each other. Now, watching such videos/ hearing the lyrics, it’s realizing that we are digging our own hole when it comes to the indoctrination that happens through TV – not to mention the entire industry dedicated to sell toys to children which is another topic in itself. This is about me placing myself as a 7 year old watching MTV but within the contemporary context wherein I would have probably grown a hard veneer to watch M.I.A’s video and accept it as ‘okay,’ just as I accepted as ‘okay’ any explicit sexual content in videos as well as any other implied or explicit depictions of self abuse, which eventually became my ‘visual culture’ while growing up.


What did I develop? yes, sir, some type of lugubrious fascination because hey, that was cool to watch and made me different, seemed to shock people and I wanted to stand out of the crowd so – why the hell not liking this and going for that which initially scared me, then embracing it as a part of ‘what I like’/ ‘who I am’ – more or less in the fashion of how you unite your enemy if you can’t fight against it. I could write pages about other videos that created an impact in a similar way and that are regular cultural clichés of what was eventually banned or seen at late night hours on MTV like Prodigy’s Smack my bitch up. I remember being quite astonished at seeing what was made a ‘music video,’ and I mean even skeletons having sex in the toilet of a club in the Chemical Brothers’ video Hey boy hey girl made a significant imprint within me and my conception about reality and ‘fun.’ Virtually any video that contained explicit allusions to sex, violence, or a bizarre mix of it was too shocking for my eyes because of being a child (!)  I eventually made myself ‘used to it,’ then forgetting about what had been once shocking or ‘unacceptable’ to portray in a music video: my morals were ‘expanded’ which is why these type of videos are being made acceptable – repeat: being made acceptable.


Now, when/ while watching such videos I had some fairly cool ‘grounds’ wherein I learned how to be a bit critical about it and just take it for what it is – but what about every other kid that may watch these videos nowadays and want to live out just what they see on their screen? What about watching some bizarre Lady Gaga video or M.I.A’s Born Free or singing along to Paper Planes along with the obvious sounds that are implying killing for money?

What I do see is that if people/ kids/ teenagers watch this video and again grow a hard veneer to be able to ‘handle it,’ in a few years time, snuff movies and public executions will probably become part of your regular MTV Hitlist and I am concerned about it – why? Because I was once that kid that was 7 years old and got exposed to stuff that made me miss  out my entire childhood – not to blame anyone, of course – it is a simple realization of becoming aware of what the hell is being accepted as ‘entertainment,’ while trying to be edgy/ controversial which is what sells very well nowadays.


Question is, who on Earth financed such video? It seems like a short film to me and not any regular Hype Williams type of green screen studio production – it took a lot of money and seems more like specific propaganda to, once again, make controversial juicy materials that can be equally appraised as masterpieces or plain terrorism.

I ask a simple question beyond the transgressive obvious attempt of the video: would it exist if Money was not a motivation – from all angles that you can view it – to make it/ produce it?


Are we accepting something something that is inherently depicting the obvious violence and abuse in this world as part of our edgy and cool controversial videos as that which we can  incorporate within our ‘visual culture’ and make it okay for us to just see it as some part of ‘human evolution’ to watch explicit sex, female objectification, expressing the desire for All the power while portraying semi-god self-portrayals with all the gold as the cultivation of greed and desire for money as the perfect heavenly realms where ‘beautiful women’ are all around?


If we really want to evolve as humanity, we have to stop supporting everything that is pointing out  to praise money, power, heavenly existences, war, violence and sex alike as mere ways to ‘escape from reality’ – which is what entertainment actually is –  and start looking at what the fuck is being allowed as your regular TV programming on a music channel.


There’s plenty of points to take on from here like movies, video games, public advertisement, TV commercials which can be an entire realm of indoctrination in itself for the visual/sound/motion effect it contains – as well as the rest of open source/ god’s will access anyone has to unimaginable content on the internet that I will probably end up coming as ‘too short’ to name only a few of it, I’m sure you can imagine it – picture your worst case scenario of finding a photo about in the internet and I’m almost certain that Google god will bring it up to you at the click of your left button.


I am not willing to accept this video as something revolutionary as it’s only what it is: part of an entire machinery of brainwashing that takes place in your regular music video channels that are forming the seemingly non-existent children that are currently being exposed to extreme levels of violence that become part of their every day screenings at home, eventually becoming the perfect enlisted soldiers for the army.

Pop Culture is the Doom of the Nation

For now there is a plethora of things to say about this – and this is just the beginning in terms of what we are accepting and allowing to be made ‘popular’ and part of ‘pop culture’ within our world and society.


This is not about being a puritan and coming from a moral perspective of what’s right or wrong,  but rather an opening to look at the unethical aspect that is being induced in all things entertainment – not to mention the so-called reality TV shows that are also another topic in itself when it comes to what sells today on regular people that spend several hours in front of their TV screens.  This is about finding out/ becoming aware of what is currently being integrated as images that are kept for a lifetime within a child’s mind. I can speak from my own experience about shocking stuff that I’d watch on TV and eventually became used to or even keen to watch – yet every time I glance through what’s being broadcasted or made popular, I see that the envelope is being deliberately pushed further and further and that’s where some critical questions must be asked: who/ what is behind this? Is it that we are the ones setting the new ‘targets of allowance’ every time to take our levels of excitement and entertainment a ‘notch up’?


I’ve tried not to react when watching such stuff within the criticism of me being a puritan, but every time that I see a little girl singing to an obvious song about hooking up with boys to have sex, it is my duty as a human being to strike a chat with them to get to know what they think about the song and if they have any idea of what the hell they are singing to.

We must stop considering the lascivious eyes that pay well for entertainment and start considering the ones that also have access to a remote control at the tips of their little fingers at home.

If we tolerate this, then your children will be next – Manic Street Preachers


DSC06936

Watch the Fabrication of an ill-bred idea of ‘freedom’ that focuses on creating self-seeking individuals that pursue happiness wrapped with a glowing gold-like ribbon of  ‘free will’ to buy everything that you/ I ‘need’ to be ‘fitter, happier and more productive’ = Our society:

Read:


%d bloggers like this: