555. Opinions and Self-Aware Assessments

 

“Opinions are always ego and are never aware of what is life really

opinions can only exist in the mirror as ego” –  Bernard Poolman  

Here I’m having a look at how I become complicit to building the ego in our minds by giving worth, value and ‘the time of day’ to opinions and building an experience of ‘fearing’ certain opinions coming ‘from others’ in my life.

 

Now this is one of those things that it’s best to truly debunk and lay it out on ‘paper’ so to speak, because I’ve found myself still giving too much space – too much acceptance and allowance – to hypothetical opinions that I believe others may have about my life and my choices, decisions and fearing that there is something that I might ‘lose’ about myself through those opinions – like credibility, self-respect, honor – but is it really so?

 

Considering that an opinion is always coming from one’s own mind and experience in it, how can I base words or aspects – that I have to live in reality for and as myself -on others giving those attributes ‘to me’ through having a good or bad opinion about myself? It is the same as in believing that one is being truly free while living in fear of something and that’s impossible – same paradox with one believing that it is someone else that must ‘give credit’ to what one is or ‘validate’ who we are at their eyes.

 

What I’ve missed is how opinions as the building blocks of our minds/ego perpetuate and regenerate the same deception that we all collectively accept and allow through giving it ‘power’ through validation, giving it worth, giving a space into defining ourselves and ‘who we are’ through them.

 

So, is it really about ‘others’ opinions’ here that I am talking about? Or is it about the collectively and socially accepted opinions that I am in fact future-projecting as a potential outflow that I believe is ‘coming at me’ but in fact, is all entirely self-created – accepted and allow – within my own mind?

 

There’s in fact both actually, one is based on predicting the ‘usual patterns’ that may come through in the form of opinions from other people in my life – which is as predictable as I’ve seen it repeat over and over again in relation to everyone else’s life, due to it being a mind pattern and so that’s what patterns reveal: they repeat, they become predictable; and the other is in fact based on me building my own seemingly ‘innocent’ way of assessing someone’s life and consequences, where I have to be entirely honest with myself to see that as much as I believed I was being careful of not jumping into conclusions about something or someone, I in fact have done the exact same thing, many times, wherein in a possible attempt to ‘understand’ others, I jump into creating an opinion about their life, their choices without really getting to sit down with them and open up the point face to face.

 

If I look at it, we as human beings rarely do that, I know I haven’t. It’s been quite a minimal amount of times that I’ve ‘dared’ to open up a point that might be somewhat ‘deep’ with people in my reality, probably only with a handful and that’s entirely also dependent on how ‘deep’ another wants to explain and be vulnerable as well for me to have a ‘deeper context’ to themselves or something else.

 

Usually how we go about in society is creating quick ideas, assumptions, opinions of why someone ‘is’ the way they are, their life choices, decisions, their paths, their outcomes… so in a way opinions are an ‘easy fix’ to believe we have some sort of ‘awareness’ and ultimately a form of ‘control’ as knowledge and information about something or someone, that we use to then define ‘who we are’ in relation to that through values of the mind, which means we perpetuate the cycles of consciousness and inequality through this very seemingly ‘normal’ act of participating in opinions.

 

Here I see that my ‘fear of others’ opinions’ is as any fear, irrational, considering how the moment that I allow an opinion to define me, I am giving space for another’s assumption, projection and interpretation of myself or anything else in this reality to become a limitation to me – no matter how ‘good or bad’ the opinion is, because ultimately any quick assessment as ‘opinions’ are made within a limited time-frame and awareness of the person, a situation or a particular context, and I can see how quick I can be many times to think ‘I know’ how another person is and build a quick opinion about them, which are only blocks and limitations to really getting to know another person or entirely be able to physically exist in clarity within an environment without judging it from the get go and drawing a ‘first impression’ opinion to then believe I ‘know’ all about the thing, person or situation.

 

If opinions are to remain existing in this world, they will of course be entirely dependent on ‘who expresses the opinion’ and the quality of sharing a genuine assessment that has got sufficient time and/or awareness about something or someone to express an opinion about it. It will depend entirely on the person and ‘who they are’ in their lives, in their way of living, of interacting with others, of applying themselves in living principles so that then, an opinion ceases to exist as a quick judgment or assessment that leads to a misinterpretation of reality, but instead becomes an introduction, a perception within its own constrictions and limitations that attempts to give a glimpse and perspective about it, coming from an individual that can – at least – be a bit more aware and cautious of how we define, limit or expand ourselves through words.

 

In order for me to become this kind of being that can give such partial – yes – and somewhat limited assessments about something or someone as a ‘redefined opinion’ – I can learn to be careful and considerate with words that I have tended to throw around quite recklessly at times, which in my case has also been a result of my ‘quick’ jumping into conclusions, trying to ‘make sense’ of something, trying to understand something and giving off an opinion so as to make myself believe I ‘know’ or ‘understand’ something or someone, and this is what I’d like to stop existing as within myself and be that 1+ point in reality that can be more careful, considerate in creating these assessments, where I can be more aware of the words I speak – or think – about myself, anything and anyone in reality.

 

This way I can see that regardless of how ‘everyone else’ might relate themselves to their mind, their opinions and judgments, I can be aware and certain that I am the one that is changing my relationship to forming opinions and redefining them into a careful and considerate self-assessment that I can create in order to see the potentials, the points I can learn from something/someone, where I can place myself in a position of ‘placing myself in their shoes’ to at least trying to understand another from an equal stand point, where I am then not drawing conclusions in polarity or morality terms, but rather describing what I see, what I am aware of, what I can assess and conclude out of a direct experience with something or someone, where I can then be certain that I am not only speaking for the sake of ‘appearing to know’ about that something or someone, but in an actual self-commitment to be self-honest about what I see while taking my own responsibility to ensure that I am not harming, abusing, demeaning, caging or limiting something or someone in such ‘opinions’ as perceptions, perspectives or concepts I create about others or an part of reality in fact.

 

All of this I can see is what makes sense for me to do: taking it back to self, because if there’s been something constant in my life, is my own debunking of these quick judgments as opinions that I have created about something or someone through getting to know them and finding out that it or ‘they’ weren’t at all how I had thought they would be, and I end up completely blowing up my expectations, which means I had been too quick to judge, too quick to assume in an attempt to believe I know something, to believe I have ‘control’ over that which I am creating a judgment about.

 

This is how through me understanding the reasoning behind building an opinion in my case, I can place myself in the shoes of others when drawing conclusions or creating opinions about something and learn to see them for what they are: usually limited perceptions that we create when lacking the full and real context about something or someone and not knowing the details, intricacies and multi-dimensions or multiplicity of aspects that exist to everything and everyone in this reality, where we can only ‘draw conclusions’ from a point of comparison, of limitation, of judgments through our minds, which is what in fact separates us not only from really getting to know each other, but from actually considering a lot more than what meets the mind’s eye and senses.

 

This is also how I can instead focus on changing me through developing myself in terms of being careful to not be too quick to judge, too quick to create assumptions, too quick to want to ‘understand’ the intricacies of something or someone, when in fact, I have to give myself the space and time to see, realize and understand something or at least be more aware and careful of how I am seeing that something or someone, where I make sure I slowdown in that whole process of ‘getting to know’ something or someone, so that I can also not be drawing limitations within my mind in every moment, but rather remain open, vulnerable, hearing, seeing, considering, learning from and stopping quick-judgments from becoming the ‘sentence’ I form upon something or someone else.

 

Hereby I then commit myself to no longer give value and worth to opinions and judgments I have formed or created about something or someone else, and within this that I’ve created about myself and that I am aware now stand as limitations and judgments for me to stop recreating and instead, focus on a genuine ‘getting to know’ others, openly, indiscriminately. It’s all in how I decide to see reality and everything/everyone in it and if anything comes up, I have to remind myself that it’s not about ‘them’ per se, but it’s coming from me first of all, and that’s where I can start debunking the nature of opinions within myself first.

 

 

“What is best for all life is never an opinion. It is based in measurable facts in the physical. If you have self-awareness of what is best for all life in the physical, with empathy and compassion enough to overcome your fear of the system and the internal god, join Desteni to bring about a world that is based on neighborly love practically driven and directed by what is best for all in the physical world. Let the hereafter worry about itself.” Bernard Poolman

 

 

 

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132. EgoMania: Narcissism

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think, believe and perceive that because I exist within/as a sense of self importance, believing that the entire world revolves around me and label it as Narcissistic Disorder Personality, which is simply a name that has been given in this world to an enhanced sense of ‘self’ in our world, wherein we are simply existing as this augmented idea of self in our mind, as the ego which is everything that we have created of ourselves as a mental configuration in order to have something to define ourselves as, without realizing how every point of self-importance and definition is in fact a limitation to who I really am as one and equal, wherein there cannot exist any form of ‘superiority’ or inferiority’ as we are all physical beings of flesh and bones that cannot possibly exist as ‘more’ than others that are also flesh and bones.

I realize that within this world we have created names for so-called mental disorders without really having a clue of how the mind works and how we could all be labeled narcissistic as we are all only looking after our own survival and self-importance that can only exist as an enhanced ego/ idea of self that we then believe is ‘who we really are,’ without realizing it is only a set of thoughts that we have integrated as ‘who we are,’ eventually becoming those thoughts as words that exist only as a limited configuration of self as a personality/ character without ever pondering if this is in fact what ‘self-importance’ must be/ should be –

 

When and as I see myself believing that I am in fact superior to any other being and that the world revolves around me, I stop and I breathe – I realize that I am only existing as this limited mind frame of self interest wherein I have made myself ‘more’ than others as my own ego. Thus I take responsibility for such belief within the understanding that it is only in my mind that I can create something ‘more’ or ‘less’ than other – thus I direct myself to walk the perceived point of superiority/ inferiority toward others in specificity, ensuring that I align my thoughts and deeds to the realization of us being equal beings that require to establish physical agreements to live as such.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist as the belief that ‘the world revolves around me,’ wherein I had definitely placed myself as the center of my reality in my world and believing that it is ‘normal’ to always seek to win, to always seek to be the best, to always be aiming at eliminating any form of rivalry, which is only the ego of the mind that I have become and that I am here to walk as the process of realizing who am I and what I have become as my own thoughts, backchats internal conversations that I have embodied, without having ever considered how it is in these very thoughts that I came to separate myself from everything and everyone else in an ‘superiority’ state that I have accepted as ‘who am I’ by default/ automatically.

I see, realize and understand that any ‘need’ to make myself ‘more’ than others was in fact stemming from the fear of being less than others, and fear of not being ‘good enough’ and a such, fear of standing on the spotlight to which I then created an opposite experience as rejection to being in a ‘visible position,’ which is just another polarity game wherein in my mind where I kept myself low-profile while deeply inside still wanting to be seen/ recognized or admired for what I believe in my mind was ‘special’ about me.

When and as I see myself existing within the default character of ‘the world revolves around me,’ I stop and I breathe – I direct myself to within the consideration of that which I am thinking only relates to me, to expand it to others as one and equal and in that, immediately realize that that which I am only linking to ‘me’ is in fact related to all as one and equal. Thus I direct myself to consider everything and all as one and equal and within this consideration, take the necessary steps to ensure that the world revolves around the principle of life in Equality and not around a principle of self-interest that benefits only a few.

I commit myself to create a world system wherein the realization of being one and equal can actually be lived as an entire social,  political and economical framework wherein all that will be able to exist is life in equality and any other ‘delusion’ such as the exacerbated self-importance that any point of ‘narcissism’ creates, is walked through a process of self-correction to eventually equalize this aspect to an equal and one realization of who we are in reality/ in fact in this world.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself for having spent a lifetime only concerned with Me-me-me all the time, always seeking to satisfy me-me-me and manipulating, controlling and doing everything that I was able and capable to do, so that I in my mind could remain as ‘the winner’ and the ultimate ‘champion’ that could ‘do it all’ and as such, developing a sense of confidence after having realized to what extent I actually feared everything and everyone and in this, realizing that the only way to ‘cope’ with reality is becoming the imposition of fear upon others as an image of being ‘invincible’ while in fact, such image of strength, courage and bravery is a cover-up for the actual fears that I accepted and allowed to exist within ad as me, without being able to understand why –

It is only now that we are able to understand the beginning of ourselves as creation, I can see and realize that it is in fact important to understand the beginning of our creation in order to ‘make sense’ of what we have become, otherwise, it is plain ludicrous that we have gotten ourselves this far,  without having ever considered to what extent we were oblivious of our own physical body, of each other, of this world and only accepting things ‘as they are’ with no incentive to find out ‘more’ about ourselves, but only remaining as obedient servants to ‘how things work’ and ‘what’s always been like this.’ Thus I realize that through understanding fear as part of the origin of ourselves as this creation, any characters that exist as an apparent positive attribute and ‘strength’ is and can only exist as a compensating mechanism/making-up for past characters that stood/ existed as the exact opposite of what is now presented and projected as confidence/ strength, which is how all we currently exist as is nothing but characters – within this

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not want to see and realize and understand that any projection of strength, security, certainty and grandiosity can only exist as a character that covers up for the fears, the inadequate experiences and the belittling of myself that I had become, wherein we are only now realizing to what extent the starting point of everything we are and create must be corrected as we are already the direct consequence of stemming from fear as creation– thus it is quite ludicrous to even believe that someone that presents themselves as superior can be in fact so without seeing the actual fear and inFEARiority that exists in such portrayal as characters that make up for other characters in order to not have to sort out the initial fear, face it and walk the necessary self correction.

When and as I see myself creating an idea of self importance in relation to everything and everyone else, I stop and I breathe – I realize that I am possessing myself with my own thoughts and that in such split moment that I went up thinking about the ‘who I am’ toward/ comparing myself to others, trying to place myself in a ‘superior position’ to give such an answer, is already an indication of existing as knowledge and information that seeks to validate itself as such, instead of immediately breathing, and recognizing that we are in fact only divided by our own god as the mind that thinks, that believes and perceives what is here through the eye of the mind, the limited perception that we have become due to our own acceptance and allowance to Only be the mind, forgetting about the entirety of the physicality that we breathe in/as  in every moment.

I commit myself to equalize myself as my mind to and as the physical in order to ensure that my life as a physical being is directed to honor life in equality and to create in fact a world wherein there I no piece of ‘ego’ left to create inequality between the living words as flesh that we are here, ready to walk and to in fact create a world wherein self-honesty and self-equalization as life is our new living reality.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist in a default-mode of protecting myself against criticism and/or being corrected, wherein such point of being pointed out a flaw/ a misalignment indicates that my stance as ‘a perfect being’ in my mind is threatened by another, thus I see and realize that any attempt to react in anger toward those that are pointing out something to see and correct for myself’ is only me as the ego of the mind trying to defend myself –

When and as I see myself reacting to any form of criticism and correction, I stop and I breathe – I take responsibility for myself to in that moment breathe and realize that only an ego can react whenever another is pointing out something to correct and walk as part of a self-corrective process that I am in fact actually grateful for, as it is only through my participation and interaction/ communication with others that we can face ourselves in self-honesty. For further expansion on this point, read  93. “No need to explain, I got it”

I commit myself to remain here as breath in every moment that I receive constructive criticism wherein I instead realize that it is to be grateful to have the ability of receiving feedback upon myself and my ‘doings’ in life, as we had become so used to only ‘caring for ourselves’ that another’s flaw was seen as an opportunity for us to get ‘past’ such person with such flaw, instead of actually stopping and assisting and supporting them to see and realize the point that is being missed within ourselves/ our reality within the consideration of how we can only thrive through living as equals.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to in my mind having judged people that I believed were arrogant, self-centered and egotistical to the utmost degree, without realizing that every time that I thought this and believed myself to be judging them ‘fairly,’ was in fact me mirroring myself back to myself, wherein I had not seen and realized how that which I experience in my mind as judgment is in fact only about me, using others as a mirror to see who and what I have become – thus

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from my own reflection as the personalities and ‘ego’ that others presented in my reality, that I only judged in a critical manner, without ever realizing that I was always only in fact judging myself as the mirror of who and what I have become in fact.

When and as I see myself judging other people that I perceived as narcissistic, egotistical, arrogant and selfish I stop and I breathe – I realize that these judgments are in fact related to me, thus I take the point to ensure that I walk through the prominent patterns wherein such labeled ‘narcissism’ exists, so that others can also have a look at how the Desteni I Process in fact is a pivotal point of supporting ourselves/ one another to face who we are and have become as our mind, with the assistance of a buddy that is essential to begin ‘trapping’ ourselves in our own believed and perceived ‘stability’ as ego and superiority that we tend to create in our minds.

I commit myself to live the realization that all judgment that I create in my mind is always about myself – thus within this, I see and realize that any judgment upon anyone and any aspect of this reality can in fact be exposed to make it evident, yet walked through a process of self-forgiveness and self-corrective application to ensure that we in fact take responsibility for the point of separation of which the judgment stems from. This way we ensure that every ‘spot’ we encounter within/ as ourselves is taken self-responsibility for.

 

I commit myself to expose the so-called mental disorders as labels that only serve to entertain ourselves with apparent ‘dysfunctional minds,’ without understanding who and what we are as the mind.  Thus the commitment lies upon educating myself and others to understand how the mind works in detail and in doing so, ensuring that we in fact create a point of self-stability and self-direction standing one and equal as the mind, the physical, energy and substance within the consideration of what is best for all.

 

I commit myself to exist as a being that regards life in equality within/as everything and all that is here, which sounds ‘cool’ yet requires an actual physical system to implement such ‘view’ and realization of who we are as Life in/ as a new political, economical and social system that will enable beings to realize equality as the only value that is Life, which is how the Equal Money System is the essential platform to live and coexist as equals.

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