Tag Archives: show

75. Bursting Dreams to Live Reality

 

How many times have we made decisions in our lives based on what ‘others think’ of ourselves, what we are ‘good at’ and what we should do? In my experience, I took other’s opinions as validations to my own beliefs and ideals, eventually only making decisions once I had gathered enough ‘confirmations’/ validations to my own desires, wherein within the Art point itself, what others said about me and ‘my artwork’ mattered enough to make myself confident about making a decision in life to study art. This implies that I really only allowed myself to be driven by other’s opinions about myself and what I wanted to do, but never fully only considering myself and taking into consideration all consequential outflows from this decision in practical terms: how am I going to live, how can I practically direct myself within this career, what are the odds to ‘hit the jackpot’ in the artworld? To place it shortly: I had fallen in love with art and I made a decision based on this attraction to it, trying to equate myself to that expression through believing that I could ‘make it’ – and the point here is not to digress if I am capable or not, but the starting point of the decisions in my life based on having others’ ‘backup’ for me, just because of not being confident enough to make my own decisions and be self responsible about them.

 

Dreams of fame and fortune

So, here we go with a specific event wherein I was in an art gallery with 2 people – friend and ex-partner – and how the conversations that we would have while staring at other’s works would fuel my ego and my decisions to think that ‘this is it’ and in that, build the idea of myself as ‘an artist’ based on opinions, judgments and my own daydreaming which would happen as I was listening to them and staring at other artists’ works.

The following is an actual picture of that moment wherein I was daydreaming about the stuff that I’ll disclose here:

marlena 2006

 

 

Self Forgiveness Statements

Pattern: Making decisions based on what others think – Not being confident enough to support me in common sense to make my own decisions

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to always had waited for other’s opinions and judgments upon myself and ‘what I should do with my life’ in order to make sure that I was making the ‘right choices,’ without realizing that everything that others could point out would be based already on the idea, belief and self-creation process of ‘who I want to be’ – which implies that all the confirmations I would get from others toward myself and my desire to study art, would stem from the same complacency that is played out in relationships, wherein we support each other’s decision without really supporting another to take into consideration that which is practical and best for all –

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to ever project blame onto others for having supported ‘my mind fuck’ when in fact, it was only me-myself that created such mindfuck in the first place, which implies that my desire to get confirmation/ validation upon my choice in life was only stemming from a desire to make myself ‘sure’ as ‘who I am’ as the ego that I was busy building as ‘an artist,’ which means that even if someone could digress from my decision, I would still have taken the road to study art, because I was only looking for the ego-validation as the decision I had already made, but only sought to be ‘sure of’ to give myself more confidence to actually make the decision to change my career and study visual arts.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to step into a gallery with a predisposition to compare ‘what I do’ and ‘what I would imagine myself doing’ from the get go, wherein every time that I go to an art gallery, I access the immediate profile of ‘me being an artist’ and comparing myself to what I’m looking at – (read further in the entry Looking at Art–what is going on up there?)

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to future project myself with having ‘my artwork’ on such gallery walls and delving into the imagination of what my friend suggested as in ‘imagining my works hanging on those walls someday’ – wherein I allowed myself to simply dream about it and never really consider the actual steps and work required to get there, as well as the starting point of such daydreaming desire being a yearning to be famous, to be recognized and to be ‘praised’ just like any other artist.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to listen to what others had to say in that moment wherein they assured ‘you’ll be a great artist someday’ – which links to what my parents would say, becoming proud of me having to be this ‘great professional’ in whatever career I would choose, just because of the reputation I had built around myself as a ‘good student’ and being ‘good at everything I would do’ – which became like foam to elevate myself and my ego, without really taking into consideration the physical, practical reality of my decisions to get myself to such position.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to get confidence within my ‘living choices’ to be and become an artist based on the props for my ego I would get from others in that moment wherein I would then delve into imagining my ‘solo show,’ believing that I could someday just get there by the magical wand of my own talents, which is basically daydreaming and using a desire as a way to make decision in life based on ‘what I wanted to be’ as a preference and infatuation, but never really considering the practicality of my decision in a world wherein Money must be made on a constant basis to live and survive.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to fully delve into the desire and experience of imagining myself being an ‘important artist’ and famous, well known wherein this desire for fame and fortune stood as ‘my dream to come true’ that I thought I could attain by deciding to study arts and simply ‘get it’ because ‘I was so good at it,’ which proves how we can take other’s opinions and judgments as a way to validate our own self-belief in means of ‘fulfillment’ based on separation from self.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to already feel ‘special’ and ‘important’ whenever others would compare the works in that gallery to what I do and judging it as ‘less than’ what I do, which is how through comparing works by subjective opinions/ judgments, I came to build up my self-belief as being in fact ‘better’ than others and having ‘all that is required’ to be a great artist based on opinions/ judgments and my own desire to be special, which I used to validate my desire to be and become an artist.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to go into my ego-mode and actually voice out that ‘yes, the artworld needs some ‘Marlen’ in it’ as a way to validate that I was in fact ‘better’ than others as a way to make myself feel like I was already a ‘true artist’ because others could recognize it as well –

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to, from these moments, feel More secure to make the decision to go to art school, because of what my friends would say about ‘my art,’ and deeming them as great judgments because they are ‘cultured people’ and ‘well read’ which meant that their opinions/ judgments were ‘valid’ in my mind-scheme of values, wherein if someone else had said, it would not have mattered that much – but because they ‘knew of art’ and would be validating my stuff = I felt like such validations were Real and ‘truth’ and ‘meaningful’ for me to take them into consideration and think that I should then be ‘really’ good at it

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to look at works of art with a critical eye, wherein I am not here as myself breathing and embracing other’s expression as self, but immediately compare myself and what I do to ‘what others do,’ accessing the value-mode of seeing myself as better/ worse than other’s works, which is unacceptable because when existing in superiority, I would feel ‘good’ about my work- and when seeing myself as less/ worse than the artwork on the wall, I’d go into depression and self-deprecation.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to take pride on what I do as ‘my art’ and whenever I compare it as being ‘better than’ others’ works of art in specific galleries, building up this sense of trust and confidence which is not Self-Confidence and Self-Trust, but only validation of the ego through comparison, which is then nothing else but another value-game that I accepted and allowed myself to play as ‘the rules’ within the artworld.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to go into daydreaming, fantasizing about myself being the one having that show in that art gallery, being proudly recognized and praised in my home town, going far away into me traveling around the world with my works – wherein I used this daydreaming to fuel the ‘artist’ personality, beginning to believe myself to be better than others and be special, which is how I initiated my career and taking pride based on others’ judgments toward my work.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that I only had to get myself a license to ‘be an artist’ to be validated in the artworld, which is how I saw everything as ‘very simple’ to do without really taking into consideration all aspects and dimensions of my decision, but simply making a decision based on my daydreaming, others’ opinions upon what I do and using that as a validation to be and become ‘an artist.’

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to be driven by my desires to be famous wherein ‘going to New York’ to one day exhibit my work became like this Mecca for me, wherein I associated being able to one day present my work there as the ultimate lifetime achievement, believing that I could only be ‘fulfilled’ and consider myself as ‘successful’ if I could get to that place one day as a ‘consummated artist,’ not realizing that I was in fact just following my dreams and not really giving a fuck about the world, the actual system that we live in but falling into the trap of seeking my own desires and dreams while having only the ‘intention’ to do some ‘good for the world’ only once that I could get to such position, which is absolutely what any other charity works like: only giving a little of the ‘greatness’ achieved as money as fame/ fortune for the ‘have nots’ and feel better about myself within such future projection as in: following my dreams BUT also supporting the ‘poor ones.’ Which is absolutely, unacceptable – and

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to access shame of myself as how I existed back then, because of the world system, this entire reality never having been a part of my plans and decisions in life, but only following what everyone else was busy doing: seeking to be successful in any ‘field’ of reality that they wanted to develop themselves in, just for the sake of personal interest/ personal development wherein an actual point of Self-Responsibility toward the world was Never considered as part of the plans, which is how I allow myself to let go of the regret that I’ve been holding on to with regards to this choice I made in my life based on my own desires, wants, needs and delusional dreams of grandeur that I actually followed until everything was clear enough for me: I had brainwashed myself and others to support my decision based on self-interest and the ego-praise that everyone in society supports – whereas when one stops following such ‘dream,’ one is seen as ‘not successful’ simply because the specialness and perpetuation of the ego is not ‘here’ any longer, which is placing a stop to the system of career-choices to enhance egos/ keeping the system in place, as I realize that standing for life in equality is not better or worse than, it’s just a life-decision to take self-responsibility.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to daydream about ‘elite people’ bowing down to my work which only gave me a sensation of power over those that I would perceive as ‘more powerful’ than me, due to all the money they have, which I took as a challenge to walk through, because of all the previous judgments I had held toward ‘the elite’ people and the artworld itself, wanting to prove to others that I could be ‘praised by those with money’ and in that, building a fortress around myself as my own ego.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to make a decision about me being ‘sure enough’ to be an artist after all the daydreaming/ future projection with backchat in my mind, seeing myself as ‘totally making it’ according to what others would say about me/ my work as well, which made me confident enough to propose this to my parents and let them know that ‘art was my REAL profession, and that I had to be/ become an artist no matter what.’

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to believe that I had a ‘true passion to create,’ without realizing that I was simply using the same lingo charged with feelings of grandeur toward art/ art creation and that I used this as a tool to convince myself, others and my parents specifically to support my decision to study art, letting them know that ‘I cannot envision myself doing anything else in this world other than art,’ which is a great fallacy and self manipulation to only follow my dreams of superiority, fame, fortune, money, recognition and grandeur that I sought.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to convince myself to make life-decisions based on the desires stemming from myself as my ego, stemming from myself as the acceptance of a desire as a separation of who I am as one and equal wherein art became this ‘idolized’ field of reality that I wanted to be a part of, just because of how I programmed myself to see it as an elevated and ‘evolved’ human activity, how I deemed it as something special, a ‘divine gift’ to see the world in a ‘different way,’ and within this justifying that I had to drop out of literature and change my plans in life, following the ‘big jackpot’ in the artworld.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to manipulate myself in the moment of doubting my decision by using a point of comparison to what I was studying then and saying ‘I cannot see myself remaining studying literature’ – which became a way to simply manipulate myself further into believing I was making the ‘best decision ever’ now that I had gathered others’ perspectives upon who I am and my own life.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to limit myself within the belief of ‘my thing is to create’ as an actual self-manipulation that I’d play out in order to talk-myself-into believing that I could only become an artist, I could ‘only’ be satisfied following these dreams, which became also a fear within me when going into the opposite point of ‘not making it’ and fearing the failure of myself within it – yet deliberately shoving such fear away because of the extent of the ‘positive validations’ I got from others and myself included to believe that: there was No way I could fail in this…

I realize how limited it is for us to only have to decide ‘who/ what we are’ as only  a profession, instead of living the expansion of who and what we are as one and equals and in that, realizing that no matter what we do, as long as we are taking the whole into consideration: we will stand by the decision we take as life supports life and there is no ‘wrong decision’ within doing what’s best for all.

 

Ideal Future

Ideal Future 2003  (she still looked clueless and worried lol)

 

 

Self Corrective Statements:

When and as I see myself making decisions based on other’s opinions about ‘what I am good at’ wherein only a self-belief as personality is considered, I stop and I breathe – I realize that I must direct myself in a way wherein Who I Am is no longer bound to a preference, a desire, an ideal of myself in my life but instead decide to direct my life in a way that I can ensure that the choice that I make will be in support of myself and all equally, taking a position in my world wherein I can actually dedicate my life to Life itself, supporting myself and others, which implies that I must establish my own equality and oneness so that there are no more desires existent within me to ‘fulfill’ in separation of what’s best for all, but I ensure that I walk the decision to dedicate myself to life, and within this, whatever decision I take on in any particular field, the starting point of it will be very clear: life in equality as myself in all ways.

 

When and as I see myself doubting my own choice, I realize that in such allowance of becoming the doubt, I am diminishing myself to uncertainty that is existent only when a conflict of interests exists within me – which implies that I must clarify for myself first where such doubt stems from – what am I trying to protect? What and who am I manipulating to impose ‘my way’ as ‘my choice,’ instead of considering at all times what is best for all life – within this, I realize that any friction and conflict emerging from a decision based on common sense, must be specifically scrutinized to see where I am creating such conflict from self-interest, desires, wants and needs that I realize are always in the way of the consideration of what’s best for all life.

 

When and as I see myself resorting to the memory of myself as ‘an artist’ to create an idea of not being ‘satisfied’ with my life, I stop and I breathe. I realize that such idea of self was created from the starting point of everything that I allowed myself to be only as my mind, which implies that ‘who I am’ here as a common sensical being will no longer be bound to a preference, an ideal or desire of ‘who I want to be,’ but instead realize that I am already here, walking the living decision to support myself as life, and within that, seeing that no ‘dream’ can ever be an actual self-directed decision as dreams are always only based on what the mind places in our ‘heads’ to continue existing in the limitation of personality, ego/ preference – thus, I ‘remind’ myself that This process implies letting go of my personal interests in the name of ALL as Equals wherein there is no need to only be ‘one single thing’ and diminishing myself to one single point, but instead, learn to expand myself in a way that I can verify I am in fact supporting myself and others, which will imply at all times the consideration of life in Equality and never more just a ‘career’ or ‘profession’ based on likes and dislikes and personal dreams.

 

When and as I see myself going into the hypothetical daydreaming activity of ‘who I could have been if I have ‘given it all’ to my career’ – I stop and I breathe. I realize that I have bound myself to such dreams and idealizations of my life based on the accumulation of desires linked to people’s opinions about myself, my work/ my life, and that in no way I ever considered life in equality in such equation of ‘career choice’ – thus I see that everything that I have to ‘let go of’ was never in fact ‘real’ as myself, as it was only based on preferences and future projections that I in no way walked in an equal-and-one consideration of myself as life and all. Thus, I let go of the dream for the illusion that it always was.

 

When and as I see myself daydreaming about ‘all that could have been’ in relation to myself and the art career, I realize that such dreams were stemming from my desires to be famous, recognized and ‘praised’ as an ego that was formed when listening to others and my own backchat about myself being ‘special’ and ‘unique,’ which is the most basic form of ego-driven decisions that exist, therefore I realize that in order to walk my decision to life/ to live, I can no longer hold any dream as valuable within my decision. Once that I have made the decision to live, I ensure that any temptation as a daydreaming moment is an indication that I am not wanting to face a particular living-decision that requires my attention and focus to not deviate from the position of Self-Responsibility that I have decided to walk, thus I breathe and bring here the point that is leading me to ‘desire escaping = desire my daydreams’ due to how I had connected my career to a way to be evasive toward and of the world itself.

 

When and as I see myself basing people’s opinions and judgments upon myself/ the world based on the idea/ belief and perception that I have of them as ‘well-cultured’ / knowledgeable/ intelligent beings, I stop and I breathe – I realize that this is me just perpetuating the same system of values that are in fact abusive toward the world system, maintaining specialness and hierarchies over the realization of life in equality. I stop wanting to remain within a special ‘group of people’ that can be considered as ‘well cultured/ knowledgeable/ intellectual’ as the people I used to hang out with and have relationships toward, as I see that none that has ever contributed to a world in Equality, nor is there any Real care and consideration to doing something that will create a real change in life, and our world. Thus I let go of the dream for the fallacy that it always was and the judgments/ opinions from others that it was backed up with.

 

When and as I see myself fearing not fulfilling the ideas/ beliefs and perceptions others had about me and my life/ future within the belief that I would get to be someone ‘great’ and ‘extraordinary,’ I stop and I breathe – I realize that all those expectations were only a heavy load for me to remain as the ‘ever perfection’ idea of myself that was backed up by people around me, wherein I then created this great expectation upon myself, falling into a disillusionment and even self-belittlement the moment that such high-expectations were not able to be fulfilled. Which is how and why I can now see that none of that was ever of any value as Life and what’s best for all was in no way considered in such plans as ‘my life’ and ‘who I want to be,’ – thus I let go of the dreams for the fallacies that they are and entail.

 

When and as I see myself going back to the pattern of ‘wanting to create only’ I realize that this is mostly an evasive pattern that I used to seclude myself, forget about the world and everyone and essentially fuel my self-obsessions and desires without any common sense direction to my life and ‘who I am’

 

Thus, the realization that I get from this is that I chose a career in order to fly away from the world, not having to face myself and the ‘monetary system’ because of seeing it as ‘the bad guy’ and ‘the monster’ that wanted to only suck us dry – deciding to instead make art as a ‘noble way’ to earn money, without ever even pondering that I could support myself to be the change that I wanted to see in the world instead of finding ways to evade it and run away from it. I make sure that the decisions that I take on as my life from here on are based on what is best for all, wherein all forms of desires are seen as the limited version of myself that I thought myself to be, that I created of myself as to limit my real capacity and ability to do that which I thought was impossible: create a change in this world, and this won’t come only from me following a dream, but taking a position within the system wherein I can ensure that I am no longer controlled by desires and fears to be and become that which I will require to do and become in order to establish a world and reality wherein All can placidly decide what to do with their lives without having a need to ‘have more’ than others or ‘survive’ only, but really be supported from birth to death and in that, having a Real Choice to establish a common sensical living decision for oneself and all as equals.

 

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Equal Money System so that All can express and live the ‘dreams’ that we are currently only able to hold as an illusion due to MONEY being the main obstacle to be able to express/ live as equals to Life.

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Reality TV is NOT Made in Hollywood

We’ve been watching some documentaries that reveal the current conditions that we are living in as part of this world, yet not aware of it due to our confinement in the places where ‘everything is fine’ which are the cities and places that obtain all the benefits from the products and resources that are only ‘sold’ and ‘ready to be consumed’ in the exchange of some coins and bills, which certainly leaves behind a ghostly and quickly evaporated trail of HOW such products and resources are able to appear nicely packaged in the shelves of our local Wal-Mart – which btw has now gotten to India now, asserting their current status and power as one of the most successful slave-job industries hitting jackpot around the world with selling slavery-made cheap disposable products made in china, paying slave wages to workers and earning the most comfortable profit that comes from distribution  due to its international expansion with almost imperialistic tactics, smelling the trail of juicy amounts of money unwinding in ‘expanding economies,’ which is just a fancy name to name-the-game of becoming a great player in the capitalist game of abuse and exploitation to make the most for your pocket.

More often than not we are trapped in our own bubbles of individualized perception wherein I as the mind is the only thing that exist as if the sun revolved around us. We are entertained in our own thinking processes, walking our own Hollywood movie while missing the reality of this world, which we certainly now have the option and ability to watch if we are able to have internet and a pair of eyes and ears and enough self will and self direction to hear and see in an active mode, which would imply the realization that: this is our creation and we must take self responsibility for it. No more passive consumption of information.

 

I’ve shared before how it is through these documentaries shared by people at Desteni for some years now that I’ve become more aware of  what is happening in the world I live in.  I’ve opened my eyes to a reality that existed beyond my personal delusion of ‘wanting to escape this world’ without even being aware of the actual atrocious reality that others are merely surviving through every day. And this is not to ‘know the reality that others face’ for the sake of ‘feeling fortunate about my position,’ which is how I was usually told by my mother or family members to then ‘be grateful for.’ That’s also a load of crap as we are here to realize what is currently being experienced by fellow human beings – that are also you and me – for the sake of realizing what it takes to have our nicely packaged products and services at the flick of our wrist that holds money to buy it. Buying in itself is then the single act of agreeing upon the abuse that the creation/ production/ manufacture or service provision entails as all the lives – not only human – that are affected through its process from being something that is only ‘here’ as part of Earth into becoming an entire product that can be bought and sold = made profit from while raping the Earth in absolute disregard of all life.

The very fact that we use money is entailing our absolute acceptance of slavery by the single fact that we play a blind eye to not see or – in most cases – even be interested of getting informed, becoming aware of how things are created; how animals that we eat are being slaughtered and kept in hideous conditions, how the clothes that we wear, the iPod that we carry around, the computers that we sit in front of and virtually everything that’s currently sold is made and will entail at least one single abusive commercial relationship – yes that means money related. I can assure you, most of the stuff we consume if not ALL of it is the product of slavery, of low barely-to-live wages and often deplorable conditions doing jobs that we would probably not even imagined existed, yet existed as part of the forces that create the products that we consume, products that we’d like to rather  believe that come from a nicely antiseptic and clinical environment as some scientist’s laboratory.

 

I read Cameron’s blog “The Sulfur Ghosts of Indonesia” which was a very cool self-reflection on his experience and general realization on what’s portrayed in this greatly made video that shows the reality lived in this same world while we might be caged in our little boxes where everything is seemingly just alright.  This documentary shows the reality of what other human beings have to go through every single day to ‘make a living’ Once again, all of this existent because of money, because of living in a world wherein the countries with the most resources are exploited by those that have the capital to manufacture and produce goods/ services with what is obtained/ extracted through slave labors which means the abusive treat of workers with a  minimum cost for the extraction of resources to make the greatest profit once it hits a store near you. These men are filmed while they have their regular menial jobs going down the pit of an active volcano to get sulfur, carrying up to 70 kilos and drinking alcohol as a fake source of bravery to go through this each day, amongst many other experiences in between that I’m sure we cannot even begin to comprehend through this.

The particular situation of this documentary – and similar to the cocaleros situation in Bolivia “Risking it all” also produced by Al Jazeera – reveals the day to day actual hard work that is endured by people to make the least to live while dreaming of someday being able to leave such places in means of a better life. It is literally heartbreaking how while this is happening somewhere in the world there is an entire schizophrenic egotron alternate reality lived in other places in the world where self-pleasure, entertainment, greed and the most unbelievable hedonist treats are created out of and with the money that is made from the exploitation that is inflicted upon these people. And somehow we even dare to say that what happens somewhere else in the world has no direct correlation to our lives. That’s just unacceptable upon the face of the blatant evidence of this around the world.

I agree with what Cameron began saying which is how I am here being cozy in my room watching this and in moments even getting lost in the aesthetics of the entire film and the picture details which I certainly had to snap out in a moment to see my own programming, seeing everything as a nice picture or ‘quality made material’ and for a moment forgetting about this being The Real World and getting in the ‘mood’ of it being a movie. Fuck “reality TV,” that’s just another sickening move by the media to make believe that ‘reality’ is all about personal conflicts, relationships and all types of human drama lived in stages places where ostentation and the stupidity of man become the protagonist. No, that’s NOT Reality TV at all. That’s just a cool business for those that seek to sip the most out of you.

Bastian made a cool comment upon this activity of documentary watching which is how this is what should be broadcasted 24/7 on our TV Screens. I mean, the most I get at times is reports from ‘human trafficking on CNN’ and related matters;  the rest of the fucked up hundreds of channels are specifically designed to make believe that ‘reality’ is able to be categorized according to personal preferences with regards to what our “lifestyle” is all about: sports, cooking, sitcoms, movies, music, news, audio channels and repeat. Oh and have your remote control with little lights in case you fail to see the three digit code for each one of them.

 

I was saying how I got lost in a moment for seeing the picture and its quality and beauty, revealing that I was no different to the tourists that take photos of such places, smiling while slaves are passing by – and we even dare to see ‘them’ as part of the entire novelty that such places may represent for someone that comes to ‘pay a visit’ to the place for a couple of hours and then leaving off with a nice souvenir, while people literally leave their thousands of breaths in those places, doing the same every single day while pondering about ‘the west’ or the ‘north’ where all of that which is slaved is taken to make some other fellow human beings rejoice by seeing what the mighty bills at hand can obtain in one single moment, completely oblivious to this other side of the coin.

 

Watching documentaries sometimes leaves me with an intrinsic desire to end all of this nonsense in one go, like wanting to desperately give an end to this nightmare for other human beings . Though it’s clear how that only reveals the point of not wanting to face ourselves as the entire network of self-enslavement and limitation that we are existing within ourselves as our mind and as the world system where we are the actual evil that have pacted upon our enslavement to this make believe system called Money, which stands as the almighty god that everyone is currently subdued to.

 

What may seem like our everyday ‘living’ and part of ‘who we are’ can be someone else’s pipe dream somewhere else in the world.

We are probably too fixed with the idea of suffering and despicable human situations linked to starving people by default of which we only get to see in ubiquitous pictures and films, often seeing them in a passive mode  that has lost its ability to ‘shock’ and has become part of the popular imagery – yes how fucked up is that. Yet, watching people in their current slave jobs, watching animals in situ where their worst nightmares are perpetuated, watching “criminals”/people in jail, telling their stories broadcasted for anyone to hear is something that literally allows us to place things into perspective every time that we dare to, for a moment only though, step into someone else’s reality, a fellow living being reality in this same world –from insects, to the trail of water, to people’s lives in certain countries and religions, from slave jobs in highly risky conditions to children sniffing glue in the subways of Rumania – from getting a spiffy bird’s eye view of the world with gloomy data on our world’s depletion of resources to the understanding how the water that we buy in bottles is only a thousand-time profit making for the companies that sell you your tap water; from the massive and hideous killings of dolphins in Japan to the viewing of hundreds of tons of wasted food being dumped around the world, while holding that initial image of people starving as the ultimate depiction of human suffering.

 

I’m glad that I’ve been linked to watching them all which is yet another awesome thing about walking as a group where we share what we are watching so that we can create a collective awareness of other beings’ lives on the same planet and how it becomes another reason of why we are one ‘vote for world equality’ so that we can finally give an end to this daily torture that human beings that are you and me as well are going through.

What I just remembered from the great impact I had when watching these type of documentaries almost 4 years ago is how I would go into a mental experience of ‘feeling sad’ or ‘feeling bad’ and indirectly guilty about it which only lead me to enhance yet another personality and victimization point where no self-responsibility was realized.

Now it’s a matter of seeing the reality as it exists and stopping any form of reaction wherein I see and realize that this is our creation and we can only use this information for the sake of creating a solution that will make sure that their lives will no longer be bound to money, to make sure that we get educated to get to know about these atrocities and how we as humans are directly creating it all. Is suggest you read Cameron’s blog to see what sulfur is used for and we’ll understand how the requirement of it is a byproduct of the current capitalist system that we’ve accepted and allowed as ‘our world’ where some are meant to be fucked-for-life while others are meant to live as kings of the hill where coins and paper bills pay away the most basic needs that people living in slave conditions buy to barely survive, basic needs that should be grated for all human beings by mere virtue of being alive.

As far as myself, I got to see yet once again the bubble and literal containments that we live in. When I say bubble and this make-believe world as the cities that we live in, the image of this dream-like structures created by Jacque Fresco for The Venus Project come to my mind. How would such ‘cities’ be able to stop the suffering of people that are used to living in such rich natural environments and that could actually live a very basic lifestyle while enjoying themselves – which is how I personally see that life should be – and instead have people in this ultra automated structures where hedonism becomes the ultimate ‘goal’. This might seem ‘off topic’ yet it is used or seen as one of the plausible options to create a ‘better world’.

 

Seeing the reality of people in say non-western type of societies allow us to see how we have set a ‘standard living’ based on the same propaganda that we’ve been fed with throughout our entire lives. And it’s not like we should now feel ‘guilty’ for this as we literally didn’t know anything better, we weren’t aware of this at all. This is how in news channels when they shift the news from violent repressive acts to talk about the queen’s new royal drapes for her palace or this or that pollutitian’s new ‘reality show,’ or shootings in a war zone, protests occupying the streets… that’s all part of the entire showbiz of this reality, as it produces the expected reactions within people that will shape their opinions to then have a ‘say’ about this world based on how the information has been deliberately structured and conducted through media.

This is why we don’t get to see these documentaries amongst other interesting and constructive information that expose the media itself, the corporations that are making the most of us buying into the traps that will vindicate their actions as some form of development, progress, defense of a nation, preventive measures to shut down potential enemies, exposing half-assed truths where the remaining half is then left aside to only create the effect of being informed and omitting speaking about any form of potential solutions, as it would also debunk their entire business while creating a certain profile of being an informative-caring network.  If there was no juicy profit making for CNN, would they still care about slave labor? How come any news or any media hasn’t ever openly shared space or proposed for an entire reform to the system – not even your alternative media gets to such point yet.

This can only confirm that the actual solution is still not seen or is still dumbed down as ‘impossible’ or as a ‘pipe dream’ without realizing that such ideology and criticism is only stemming from the same media that has taught us about the good and the bad guys in this world, failing to promote self responsibility obviously or supporting a critical eye view based on facts and not made-up sentences. That’s something that is often – may I say – deliberately side viewed as not many would like to continue watching the reality that is created from our very actions of buying and consuming what is here through money and if that happened, their audience would be reduced substantially which is not good for the pocket’s health.

 

At Desteni we are becoming the new culture of life, the new way of living as a human being that directs himself/ herself to become informed through articles, news, documentaries and writes upon sharing what’s realized in common sense. This is a deliberate self willed action that is done while others are partying, ‘drunking’ and  seeking for the next quick fix to keep existing in a fuel-generated bubble that will eventually have to burst.

 

The culture of life entails that we stand within a principle that’s best for all, that we are walking as ourselves wherein the process of expansion and self realization in self honesty is certainly not nice or beautiful, as it is realizing the entire fuckup we’ve created of this world as ourselves and in that, seeing that the solution won’t come from our preprogrammed chauvinistic authorities that seek to prolong their power and influence over people, it won’t be an easy one-two-three playskool scenario either, it must  be created and directed by people like you and me that are seeing the reality for what it is without compromising ourselves through money for it; it’s about realizing and daring to continuously face the reality that we’ve neglected all along while ‘living our lives’ through the tell-a-vision, through the nicely framed reality we live in. It places our entire ‘real world into perspective with a great kick in the ass when we see how any ideal of magnificence can only entail an entire army of slaves to be able to build it. And that’s what we are still pursuing as humanity, that’s what we’ve become: the oppressors of fellow living beings that disregard life and exploit it all in the name of money.

Hence, we are the ones that must stop existing in our little bubbles of self-created movies wherein we are constantly seeking an experience, a ‘something going on’, a point of limitation to hang on to, where wanting/ needing/ desiring becomes the constant in the humans equation of what ‘life’ is.  What is Life really? Certainly not known or even explored in actuality by a majority in this world. We are all neophytes within the realm of actually living as all we’ve known is this current staged living condition governed by Money as the ‘own-me’ that we have accepted as value upon us. We are only now  walking the process of getting to finally live through understanding our creation, through taking self responsibility, through stopping all cycles that have enslaved each other as the current structure of the system through deliberately acting and willing ourselves to live  in ways that we become the solution that this world requires.

We cannot expect things to be done in ‘automatic’ as we know what ‘automatic’ leads to and we only have to look at this world to see what our disregard for all things and all people in this world as proof of the ultimate irresponsibility conducted by the human in its attempt to make illusory mind superiority into a reality which is proving to be unsustainable and only becoming a crime against life that must be stopped for once and for all.

Equal Money System so that we don’t blow this entire world up.

Dare to care, inform yourself, get yourself out of the limited mind frame of reality that more often than not is limited to viewing reality through a screen. So why not using such resources at hand for a supportive activity that can actually allow us to expand our current perception of the world to expand our horizons about what needs to be done here in order to dignify people’s lives.

I do recommend doing this as it focuses ourselves on the solutions that must be created which then places all seemingly distractive self experience into perspective where we can only vow ourselves to support us to see it for what it is, walk through it and direct our efforts to understand the ‘greater picture’ where not only ‘I’ as the mind exist but we as all living beings that are sharing this one single planet that we must stop from ceasing to exist.

 

http://www.equalmoney.org

 

TO NOT blow theworld with Equal Money


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