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205. Self Interest as an Obstacle to Real Change

 

  • “Freedom of choice is now protected by the individual as it feels like it is free –in spite of the evidence to the contrary and even when it rebels– it only do so in ways that do not impede with its special comforts and thus –the system is safe from the group as the individual now act as a group through what it buys or watch on TV. So –you fear to lose COMFORT and CHOICE to BUY stuff” – Bernard Poolman

 

Continuation of the Elite Character

194. Let the Mask Fall!
195. The Righteousness of Evil
196. The Elitist Evil behind Relationships
197. Friends of Convenience
198. Wealth and Positivity a Synonym of Abuse
199. You Hate the Beautiful People?
200. The Make-Up Reality
201. Friends of Convenience: for a little piece of Heaven
202. Optimism as a Sign of Success
203. The Acceptance of Heaven is the Allowance of Hell

204. Opposing the System: Elitist Act of Irresponsibility

 

 

I would  judge people that would only spend their time focusing on ‘what to wear, what party to attend, calling their friends, sitting on their couch watching TV, going shopping, etc. which I deemed to be activities that only people that have no survival problems can participate on – however, I was obviously projecting the problem outside of myself and taking on again the ‘Self Righteous’ aspect of judging others, pointing fingers and blaming because it’s much easier to Blame than take Self Responsibility and see where and how I was doing exactly the same processes – different conditions, different scenarios but same starting point: having money, not worrying about having to ‘make a living’ and instead believing that through my wits and intellectualization of reality, I could create a difference in this world.

 

Well, what did I get from those endless hours of sitting sipping coffee with sociologists, writers, economists, poets, artists and plain dissidents of the system? Nothing else but always ending up with a feeling of ‘powerlessness’ while not having to worry much about it at the end of the day, because hey at least we were having money and studies to live, I see how even within that the point of change was projected ‘there’ in the future, never ever pointing fingers back to ourselves, I was so high up on my horse about blaming the system that I simply was absolutely getting an energetic kick out of it. All we would eventually realize is that  money determined everything and that no intention of change will do a single thing, nor criticizing will do a thing either which is part of what I was exploring yesterday in terms of the opposition of the system, of which I obviously participated in.

 

I was comfortably wanting to become part of the elitist groups of intellectuals that could speak about reality as politics, economics, culture ‘from head to toe’ and be revered for that while earning good money from the system for doing so – because of what I had seen some others in my reality doing – however never in fact becoming an active part of proposing a solution, because even then I was still only wanting to do it as a form of ‘resistance’ and ‘exposure’ which is how many of our current intellectuals and well-versed people can have ‘all the knowledge and information about how the system works’ – this being within the current available considerations that fall short when it comes to a holistic understanding of reality – and can even propose great sounding theories of how to create a change – but missing out the point of ourselves, who we are as the mind, how the world system is an outflow and consequence of this relationship of ourselves to our own mind has been absolutely missed.

 

Most of these theories are never taken to an actual political implementation, since they end up within certain groups/ factions of society that only seek to create a constant ‘war’ and opposition to the ‘establishment’ as a source of self-empowerment, without realizing how there will be absolutely No change in reality if we remain only blaming others, finding flaws without understanding the cause of such flaws, sipping our coffee in long hours of discussing the system, in conventions and global forums to ‘discuss the problems’ without proposing tangible solutions, or going to protest and then hooking up with friends to party, or raging against the system of which one is also being able to eat from; all of this reveals to what extent money is also a condition that allows us to ‘rebel’ only and be concerned in self—interested ways to make an apparent ‘change’ in this world, while being rather absolutely ignorant to the actuality of the process that must take place in order to Really in Fact consider even what an actual change in this world would require, which is at all times: ourselves, focusing at this moment on the individual and realizing that no matter how long it takes, education is the key here, and that as long as we continue diverting our efforts to seek to create a point of ‘opposition’ from our safety zones of ‘opposition’ and ‘dissidence,’ nothing will change.

 

So, it became rather part of the main branches of my personality, wanting to Remain within my comfort zone while taking on a seemingly ‘critical position’ toward the system, keeping my benefits, keeping my security and protection that money gives me, having the ability to ‘study lots’ to have all careers necessary to ‘empower’ myself  as a knowledgeable Act without Acting it out – this is how when getting to Desteni and realizing that I would Actually have to do it became quite a blow to my ego, and I can say that in this regard, I am barely only stepping within my own realization of what does it meant to really Do everything it takes/ whatever it takes to live out the words I am speaking here – otherwise, it would be no different to sipping coffee, theorizing about reality and expecting ‘world change’ to come while I remain in my comfort zone. 

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to believe that I could ‘change the world’ while holding on specifically to that which would ensure that every step that I take toward such apparent ‘change’/ revolution would not disturb my security and comfort zone within my reality, which implies: not allowing my own criticism toward the system to compromise my position, which is then being and becoming the absolute walking paradox, deliberately ignoring how it was only because of money that I was able to have the time to read and chat and educate myself about the system and direct such knowledge and information ‘against the system’ while also seeking to educate myself ‘more’ within the system to create further opposition/ criticism to it within a position of ‘respect’/academicism which is like wanting to use weapons to end a war – which does happen in our reality – and so, it reveals the level of ignorance we have accepted and allowed ourselves to deliberately create in order to ensure that We are Not affected by that which we are complaining about – this is within the standing point of the specific character of the educated/elitist antagonist of the system.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to actually initiate such desire to ‘oppose the system’ from a vantage point of having money, having a good life and only wanting to seek to do some ‘justice’ for the people mostly because of wanting to become a particular character in my society wherein I would still remain in a position of comfort/ power and ‘support others’ as well, which reveals how I was not willing to fully let go of my self interest and desire to remain in a comfortable position in order to create a point of change in this world, and I see and realize how this has been ‘the point’ that I have accepted as a limitation, because of still wanting to have the ‘good life’ at all times, which then becomes just another way of wanting change while holding on to an aspect of that which is required to be changed, because of fearing losing the comfort and general ability to buy/ consume/ fulfill my desires and in such point, I give into the same cycle of self interest that exists when considering having to do whatever it takes to create a point of change in this world, which certainly begins with myself and the decisions and Choices I have at the moment.

 

Within this, I commit myself to ensure that I am not deliberately wanting to stick to my point/ zone of comfort in order to remain ‘safe’ and ‘protected’ by the money that I have as a point that must be feared to let go of, and instead remind myself how Self Interest is The point that has always stood in front of any actual full-blown decision to stand as an immovable example of self-correction in this word. Thus,

 

I commit myself to investigate where and how  Self Interest exists within me, maybe not in the form of luxuries or comfort as money, but also as a point of further responsibilities and preparation that is required for me in order to stand as part of the actual change in this world system.

 

More to come.

 

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91. Jocose

n    adjective formal playful or humorous.

Eliciting or intended to elicit amusement and laughter

 

I can see that being witty/ jocose has been valued within me as a ‘positive feature’ wherein I am in essence not fully here expressing in the moment at times, but simply pulling out jokes in order to cause laughter in others – and within doing so, being able to feel ‘good’ for that or ‘at ease’ in moments of perceived ‘pressure.’ I had walked this point a long time ago and had come to the conclusion that I would simply allow myself to express in the moment within the realization that it is not to ‘cause something to someone’ – however the automation of it is what must be considered, as well as how I tend to shift from witty to the polar-opposite which is sober, solemn.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define me as a jocose/ witty person that is able to pull out jokes with ease and use this point as an apparent ‘natural expression’ – yet the moment that I think, it is an indication that it is not natural hence it is part of the entire design of ‘who I am’ as a personality that is able to cause laughter and a sense of ‘comfort’ through jokes and humor –

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not stop every time that I have this lightning bolt desire to express something that can be ‘funny’/ be laughed at in order to create a point of enjoyment/ momentary happiness in others which means that the starting point is not the expression in the moment but stems from this energetic experience that I follow through, which means that I am not being absolutely self directive at all times.

 

When and as I experience the lightning bolt as a desire to ‘tell a joke’ or play with words in a witty manner, I stop and I breathe – I ensure that if I am going to share myself, it is not from the starting point of pursuing to create an experience in others, but simply express in the moments if and when I am here as breath. Otherwise it turns into a game that must be ‘kept up’ for the sake of causing a positive experience within me and others.

 

From Anu:

“QUESTION: What’s your perspective on been funny and making jokes etc. I have a tendency to do all that.

PERSPECTIVE: This one can investigate for oneself, in self honesty within the following questions: “does making jokes make me feel better about myself when I see others laugh/have fun” / “am I making jokes because I’m nervous and do not trust me to have a one-on-one direct communication with others” / “are there any intensions within/behind the making of jokes, or does it just come up within the context of the moment, people and environment and it is a sharing of me as I enjoyed the joke?” See, if joking is a sharing of self – then cool, but most of the time jokes are used to cover up fear/anxiety/stress when in social situations/interaction and then use jokes as a scapegoat to relax the reactions, which then becomes a cover up in not investigating why self had become dependent on jokes to interact with people instead of direct one-on-one communication. Then also the separation of telling jokes for others to laugh for self to ‘feel good’, then jokes become a deliberate point of self-interest/mind energy vampirism in a way, cause you get energy in your mind when other’s laugh. So, when jokes are told within the context of a situation/environment/people and it’s simply a moment of sharing and you LAUGH TOGETHER, laugh with yourself – then cool.”

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use witty jokes as a way to cause laughter in another, which is in essence laughing at knowledge and information that we can relate to according to a specific context that not everyone would understand, which means that jokes also turn into an egotistical way of sharing yourself only with those that would ‘get the joke.’

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to justify my desire to say a joke just because it’s ‘of no harm to make others laugh’ though, within the starting point of ‘wanting to make others laugh’ I am in fact playing a character and not being here as breath sharing myself in the moment in order to laugh about myself with others unconditionally, but it is instigated by a desire to ‘affect others in a positive way’ and within that, feeling good about myself for doing so.

When and as I see myself wanting to make a joke based on having a momentary experience of positivity and fulfillment when realizing that others can laugh about what I say, I stop and I breathe. I realize that this is in separation of myself and not self-expression in the moment.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to ever make jokes when I do not trust me to have a one o one direct communication with others and I use jokes as a way to ‘break the ice’ from what I perceive is a ‘tough person to communicate with,’ wherein jokes are then used as a way to cope with the moment instead of simply remaining here, breathing and directing myself to communicate without having to resort to jokes for it.

When and as I see myself making jokes out of wanting to ‘break the ice’ with a particular person based on how I have assessed them in my mind as someone ‘tough’ to communicate with, I stop and I breathe – I realize that I do not have to communicate based on how the other person presents themselves toward me, but that I can instead communicate in common sense in the moment.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to learn from my family how to ‘get along’ with people with more ease when making jokes, without realizing that this is simply because of me reacting to the person as being tense, tough or too serious to communicate with, wherein I use jokes in a deliberate manner to ‘soothe’ the reactions and cover up an actual experience of anxiety and distress when facing such points of communication.

When and as I see myself reacting to another based on how I have assessed them as being tough, too serious or too aloof to establish a communication with and wanting to pull out a joke in order to ‘break the ice,’ I stop and I breathe – I realize that I do not require another to laugh to a joke in order to establish communication and that any perception I hold toward another being is a mind assessment based on ‘who I am as my own character’ wherein the moment I stop playing out my character = I am able to stand one and equal to the moment and communicate openly without needing any ‘aid’ of jokes to do so.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become dependent on making jokes with people so as to ‘water down’ any perceived idea I believe others have of me as being ‘too sober/ too serious/ too bitchy’ – wherein I then present myself as a ‘relaxed, outgoing person’ using jokes as a way to demonstrate that ‘I am not serious’ – within this establishing also a judgment toward ‘seriousness’ as a character that I then act according to playing out the opposite of it.

When and as I see myself thinking and believing that I must pull out a joke in order to interact with another that I believe had an idea of me as being too serious/ sober/ too tight, I stop and I breathe – I realize that expression in the moment does not hold any memory or judgment as starting point. Thus I continue supporting myself to remain here as breath and communicate in the moment.

 

I forgive myself that I ever accepted and allowed myself to tell jokes from the blatant starting point of getting a positive kick out of it, wherein I would prepare the joke in my mind, assess the moment to ‘pull it out’ as a ‘great point’ that I knew others would react with jubilee and laughter, which then in return would make me feel very good as if I had done my ‘job of the day’ to make another laugh.

When and as I see myself believing that making another laugh makes me feel good in return, I stop and I breathe – I realize that this is just another form of mind vampirism, wherein I am in fact seeing to feel good at the expense of seeing others laugh.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that making another laugh is a gift for myself as well, without realizing that in making something ‘more’ than what It is in the moment is then indicating I am making the moment ‘more’ than myself and another, wherein I then archive that memory as ‘important’ which is an indication that I placed value/ worth to such split moment of a day to regard it as ‘special’ because I made another laugh and have a good time.

When and as I see myself feeling ‘good’ because I apparently made another laugh and feel ‘good’ for a moment, I stop and I breathe. I realize that I am separating such moment of expression with another in order to make it ‘more’ than ourselves in the expression of the moment, and within that, valued it as ‘more than myself’ wherein it becomes a ‘memory to remember,’ without realizing that in such moment I immediately separate myself from Here as self expression.

 

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to share myself in the moment, without premeditating in which moment I can make a joke or scheming how I precisely want people to react to and future projecting an entire moment just to satisfy that experience of positivity within me for making others feel good, without realizing that as such I am only seeking my self-interest as the positive experience reward of making others have a ‘good time.’

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use another’s laughter as my point of instant gratification wherein I experience a sense of fulfillment for making another apparently ‘happy’ for a moment. ‘

 

I realize that I am able to share myself in the moment without preparing an expression in order to cause an experience in another – within this, it is to realize that I can communicate as one and equal to others in the moment and that if a point of laughter emerges wherein we can all laugh together = cool.

 

I commit myself to be here as breath in every moment I find myself interacting with others wherein I stop my mind from wanting to pull out a joke or say something to ‘break the ice,’ as I see and realize that I can instead communicate unconditionally and as such, establish a self-honest starting point in every moment that I speak/ communicate with others.

 

The point of expression is here as breath, without an intention to/ toward something or causing an experience in another, but as a mere extension of our ability to communicate wherein our own realizations can be ‘fun’ at times without making it an actual ‘joke’ –

 

Jocose sounds like jo/yo= ‘I’ in Spanish and cause  – hence I realize that I am the cause and effect of my words and within that, I consider expression as a beginning and end with and as me in every moment.

 

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Breathe and realize that we do not require to be characters in order to appreciate each other’s unconditional expression.

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Time to Wake Up


Day 44: The Evil Veil of Me

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to ever pursuit the positive in life and believing that that was ‘the path’ that I had to walk as it would make me be a ‘better human being’ while neglecting the fact that such positive energy was in fact the result of the actual evil as the bastardization of life to energy wherein I made sure that ‘who I am’ as a point of separation from the whole always stands on the ‘positive side’ which I allowed myself to deliberately ‘stick to,’ regardless of the actual inner-experience that would come up when being possessed with anger and obsessive thoughts as a child, which then developed into generating a double experience within myself wherein within the outside I would present an affable and charismatic persona, but in the inside I judged my very own participation as I knew that it was only fake and ‘to get by’ within the standards of society that I always accepted as ‘how things are’ without daring to really question it as to How it is that we were all just playing games of pretending to care about each other.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to exert that inner inexplicable irritation toward myself as a child as a gnawing experience that I would then try and exert out as annoyance, annoying others and seeking attention because I did not know why I was experiencing such inextricable physical discomfort wherein I just wanted to peel myself off of my physical body.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to develop obsessions from a very young age wherein I would feed my obsessions with constantly thinking about something until I would get it, and I would then experience the temporary relief of finally ‘achieving’ something that I wanted, only to find something else to obsess about in no time, which is how I became used to being holding on to a future-experience of self-gratification which is how we are currently living as beings that only care about the immediate instant-gratification wherein there is no actual regard for that which we are consuming in the name of such gratification.

 

I forgive myself that I always accepted and allowed myself to believe that through sticking to the positive self-experience I was being a ‘good being in existence’ without ever, ever imagining that this is the actual evil of this world as all the spiritual beliefs and ideas of positive, light and benevolence stem from the very acceptance of that inherent separation of who we are as one and equal, thus becoming a worshiper of the very evil that has leads us to exist in the current state we’re living in as humanity, which is now, more clear than ever, that is taking a toll on all of us that believed that we were ‘on the good path’ of walking with and as the ‘good guys’ while neglecting that in reality, it was the other way around.

 

I forgive myself that I ever accepted and allowed myself to ‘fear the evil’ and react to such word without ever having known that everything we have been and manifested as the consequence of our primordial separation has been evil, pure evil in nature, which then explains how I would constantly hold the thought-pattern about ‘Humanity being evil’ and creating this constant ‘hardening’ experience when being ‘exposed’/ being interacting with human beings as I believed everyone was ‘on to get me’ and ‘against me,’ which explains how retreat, isolation and the desire to simply interact the least possible stemmed from this that I deemed as ‘irrational fear’ – yet it was real as the actual nature that exists as all of us, not only myself and that I can only see and understand it for what it means to ensure that I walk the process to stop any form of continuation to degrade and defy life in the name of any form of energy – whether positive or negative – it is my responsibility to stop all patterns of energy within myself, as I realize that this is the only way that I can give myself back to myself the points that I had initially separated myself from.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to ever only seek to be a positive-supporter a ‘cheerleader’ when it came to positivity and positive experiences, without realizing that within this I had made of reality nothing else but a chemical reaction that would only make me Feel Good about myself and my thoughts and place myself into this angelic pedestal, while neglecting the fact that the foundation to such experience was stemming from the actual evil that we became the very moment that we accepted and allowed ourselves to be the cause and effect of energy as the result of the desire to ‘experience’ and ‘be more’ than ourselves as equality and oneness, which means that I abdicated the wholeness of myself and vulgarized it to me being and becoming only a single experience that would only continue to keep satisfying itself through generating the same positive experience within the participation with others in reality, using them/ using life as a way to transform it into the necessary crutch for my self elation.

 

I forgive myself that I ever accepted and allowed myself to try and ‘fix the world’ in separation of myself and believing myself to be a ‘good natured being’ when in fact, I was only trying to save my own ass when it comes to realizing that any desire to do good was actually stemming from the fear that I had realized was absolutely undeniable within me, which is how I feared everything that had to do with ‘dark’/ ‘darkness’ and ‘evil’ because I had feared myself as my own ‘evil’ experience/ thoughts/ imagination that I had not been able to communicate with others, because of fearing being judged for having such experiences within me, which reveals to what extent we as human beings experience these type of inner confusion and not knowing how to ‘deal’ with it, because we were always taught to simply ride the wave of experience until it ‘fades out’ – yet not really understanding why and how I would suddenly have ‘evil thoughts’ as a child toward people in my reality, with no apparent reason, which is what manifested that self-annoyance and irritation that I tried to cover up with a positive attitude and being just cheerful, because I knew that that would keep me ‘safe’ from the evil that I actually feared as myself.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to ever pursue a ‘light working career’ wherein I would dream of being able to ‘help people’ and make this world a ‘better place’ by implementing solutions that had to do with giving hope, having faith and believing that ‘after all, it all must come down to a positive end’ – which is in fact the problem that hope instills and creates in this reality as a the laxity wherein the real nature that must be worked with through writing, applying self forgiveness and  the Self Corrective Application had been simply pushed down and covered up with all things positivity, which is like trying to build a solid foundation upon a swamp.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to ever seek relationships as a way to make myself feel better about myself, without realizing that it is through the nature of relationships that our ‘real nature’ was shaped and formed, which implies that creating relationships was an automated way to continue the perpetual desire to ‘be more’ than myself because relationships in themselves already imply separation and energetic experiences created from that moment of separation toward that which we are attempting-to and trying to reunite with. Which means that I had only reinforced separation through trying to connect/ establish relationships due to such separation only existing as an energetic experience that doesn’t consider the actual physicality as the fabric of existence as substance/ as life of which everything and everyone is made of.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to deem that everything that was ‘evil’ in this world had nothing to do with me, which was me neglecting my very own thoughts as the constant seeking for power, control, recognition, glory, instant-gratification as a constant ‘win-win’ desire within me, which is the actual core and initiation of all evil in this world wherein ‘who I am as money/ power’ is all that really drives us to want to ‘be something/ someone’ in life, which is Not living but instead agreeing to play the game and ride the ‘waves of success’ that we all comply to live in within this system that only cares to perpetuate such constant fueling of experiences, instead of regarding and supporting life in equality, which is now our duty to establish as a living principle on Earth.

 

I commit myself to debunk any inkling and remain of positivity within me as I walk myself out of the mind and into the physical, remaining as the awareness of who I have become as a result of having lived in fear of ‘the evil’ in me for such an extensive period of time, wherein morality took the place of any form of common sense and in that, becoming a biased being that only cared about listening, doing, being, supporting all things positivity for a while, while having been on the exact opposite, which lead me to a final great confusion within my life that actually lead me to Desteni and that I see and realize is the only way to stop ALL Confusions that we may have in this world when wanting to deliberately stick to the positive out of the actual fear of ourselves, fear toward fellow human beings, because we see and realize that our actual current natures is that of evil that is also a veil that we have created upon ourselves the moment that we accepted and allowed ourselves to live as energy only, as an energetic presence instead of a physical beingness that requires no definition to exist.

 

I commit myself to expose how within our current society and the ‘need’ for us to ‘define who/ what we are’ is in fact reinforcing the evil nature that seeks to have its place of consumption, satisfaction and opposition wherein we become just these lighting bolts that seek to be excited at all times in order to move while constantly wanting to get away from the negative experience and remain in a state of perfect bliss, which can only exist if energy exists – and energy is the very abuse of the physical substance as life that we have used and consumed in the name of our personal ‘power’ and satisfaction.

 

I commit myself to stop the need to be constantly defining myself as an experience and instead, embrace silence as I walk here as breath wherein every pattern of self-deprecation as an energetic experience – whether positive or negative – is understood, seen and realized as a self-abusive pattern as I now see, realize and understand how all the experiences that had no ‘explanation’ before are now becoming clear as a result of us having become the manifested consequence of our abdication toward life/ as life, which perpetuated the ‘who I am’ as that experience of separation which is then what leads to a constant seeking of experience in order to ‘feel alive’ or ‘be someone’ which is only seeking to define ‘who we are’ as that very relationship of separation which must stop here, as I realize that I am perfectly able to exist without using the mind as a constant energetic input onto the physical reality that I am able to move in, walk, breath, eat and experience as an actual moment to moment – instead of future projecting, or remembering or seeking to ‘feel something’ in order to ‘feel alive.’

 

I commit myself to show, how – we have become servants to the Devil/Energy-Authority for ourselves to only WITHIN ourselves manifest our Authority/Godhood unto ourselves, where our existence had become completely internalized and automated within ourselves as Mind/Consciousness – only existing to survive and possess ourselves as Energy; with no substantial living action visible to bring about a change of ourselves within and without.

In this – I commit myself, to through writing, self-forgiveness and self-corrective application, speaking and sharing – walk the Visible Action of The Decision to no more accept and allow myself to Serve the Devil/Energy-Authority within and as the Cause/Acceptance of accepting separation, and Effect/Allowance of allowing the relationship between the negative, neutral and positive energies of Mind; but align myself into and as equality and oneness with and as the human physical-body, to stand with and as Life-Authority of and as equality and oneness as what is/will be best for All, as my process of taking directive-principle as responsibility for who, how and what I am in every moment of Breath, and so no more exist in and as the automation of Consciousness that has become the authority over and of me, the physical-body and this physical-existence, but in fact walk in and as Awareness, here in every moment of Breath.” Sunette Spies*

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I commit myself to continue exposing our ‘real nature’ as evil in order to finally take off the veil of energy that we have abdicated our self-directive power to, and become a being that is willing to walk the necessary time and space to reintegrate myself as the physicality of oneness and equality as Life, as that which I separated myself from in the pursuit of happiness, the pursuit of ‘me as an experience’ as energy, of which now I see, realize and understand has been the very key point of ultimate enslavement that must be stopped with the implementation of the Equal Money System wherein real Neighborism is able to emerge as a new human nature, once that we have all realized that we can only thrive in equality as a group, as collective that is able to decide what’s best for all to live by and simply apply it/ be it/ become it.

 

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No Angels, No Devils – Only Physicality as who I really am.

 

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2012 Self Honesty as Fear Label

“…we’ve become dependent on fear as a survival instinct and so actually fear commonsense and integrity as it is experienced/believed to be a ‘weakness’ – you have to live in fear in order to survive as the law in the matrix goes” Sunette Spies

There is indeed a label placed onto people that are common-sensical, have integrity as a human being and are ‘honest’ within the system’s terms. Fear of survival is that inherent ‘nature’ that we have accepted and allowed as part of the conditions to socialize and interact with other human beings in our reality. We don’t get to know ‘why,’ we just learn ‘that’s how things work’ and don’t dare to even question it further, because that also relegates you to the status of  ‘questioning God’- and that is something apparently untouchable and unable to be doubted. However, our actions and interaction mechanisms reveal the fact that they are actually NOT based on what is best for all at all.

 

What I see is that the ‘fear label’ of being an integral and common sensical person deemed as ‘weak’ is how bullying begins. There is an acceptance that exists behind this, and it is learned at home: you must cheat, lie and deceive if you want to thrive in the system – you must play the game no matter what if you want to live – and that goes unquestioned as well.

 

I have exposed in previous blogs here how I had a difficult time having to ‘get into the system,’ because I was so uncomfortable whenever I had to lie or do something that was merely done to be ‘accepted within the system.’ I had linked it to the culture I live in, wherein lying, deceiving, being corrupt is ‘our every day bread’ as it’s said – meaning, everyone does it, everybody knows and if you don’t do it: you are stupid and weak for not playing rough.

 

There are sayings that imply that you must cheat in order to succeed – hence anyone that is not willing to play that game is usually kicked out of the game and crucified, which means instigating hatred through what we commonly know as ‘bullying.’ The reality is that it is not only a ‘childhood/ teenage’ thing, it is a common way to threaten anyone that wants to straighten the laws of the current crooked system.  That’s how politicians that were intending to create a change were deliberately killed before getting to be presidents – that’s an example that happened here in 1994. And there are even movies that depict how anyone that has ‘good intentions’ within the political realm, will eventually be sucked in by the system simply because of being threatened to death to do so.

 

Thus, what is a bully but a person that judges a being that is mostly honest and common sensical – but because of them not ‘playing the game’ of  fear of survival and fueling the necessary opposition to create rivalry and competition that others can ‘beat’ and win over, the being is forced to participate by deliberately attacking and instigating reactions, which is exactly how within the system we learn that we ‘need to suffer to live’ and other bs like that. All about power games and emotional reactions that keep everyone well fed within a particular suit in the world.

 

“And yet – the positive illusion is so blinding that reality is not seen at all – or, is it that reality is deliberately denied because the illusion is just better and how they suppress the voices and sights in their mind/media of the reality of the situation and fall back into the bliss of the illusion of mind – too scared to face the truth they know already exist: positivity is making no difference to the reality of here

Sunette Spies

 

This is how far we have gotten ourselves as humans – that’s how anything that promotes Equality, Self Honesty, Life, Neighborism, Self Support, Self Forgiveness is tagged as a threat to the ‘status quo’ which is nothing else but living in absolute fear of each other, in constant competition and comparison, living to the rule of thumb of who lives and who dies based on ‘how well you adapt’ to the system of getting to the top no matter how many heads have to fall to do so – and the permanent underlying reason to do so is: Money.

 

And we claim evolution? Fascinatingly enough, evolution contains the word ‘love’ backwards – loveillusion can be the way to describe how these survival mechanisms are accepted, promoted and even defended with the proudly worn crowns of ‘free-will,’ ‘free-choice’ and thinking that ‘competition is healthy’ to create ‘well-bred human beings that make the best of their lives’ – however this free-willer type of statements are based upon equating ‘the best they can’ to their personal gain and satisfying a personal interest that is based mostly on being powerful = having money, ‘being successful in the system’ which, as we know, can only be done if participating within the rules of the game = if you don’t dare to abuse, you are not considered a productive element of society.

 

We have compromised each other to this mechanism and dared to call it ‘making a living,’ existing in fear of each other, transforming ourselves into survival robots that forgot everything about living in common sense – and that’s simply because of how we have structured and based our living reality upon laws and structures that are definitely NOT supporting the well being of all beings, but only perpetuating the same ‘survival of the fittest,’ because that ensures competition, consumerism and the replenishing of the system itself.

Once again without friction/ energy going on, there is nothing that moves the cathode to the anode and the light is not generated.

 

When we dare to see how we exist and what we have created of this system as ourselves, you inevitably change your perspective about your world and reality – if daring to be Self Honest about it. So, what Sunette explains is how we tend to ‘fall back into the mind’ wherein we keep ourselves in that instant gratification of ‘positivity,’ ‘love,’ the eternal pursuit of happiness wherein you can take a chill pill and pretend that ‘everything is fine.’ Sometimes this is not only about drugs, but merely constant self-talk on how ‘beautiful life is’ while neglecting the millions that are starving today.

 

“In a world flooded with positive thinkers, we have hell being born.” – Bernard Poolman

 

This is how our media and enter.tamement operates: ‘be happy, be healthy, seek for your next greatest excitement, seek the truth of yourself, spread love, ‘be yourself’ because you’re worth it and buy your happiness in the mall of your choice – get plastic surgery, look like people in magazines because they are ‘the’ role model to follow, you want to be like them, you can’t just aspire to be like them, you must become them. Get more money, work harder, you’ll eventually ‘get it.’ And billions live by this constant backchat impulsed by all media, family, school, society – virtually any man-made reality is based on these principles, just for the sake of keeping an economic system deliberately designed to enslave some, place others in a perpetual throne while spreading new ways to create illusions of ‘fool.fillment’ to attain to.

 

“Humanity is not growing in any other way but in the rising of consumption in the constant desire to have the next item that will create a feeling of happiness through entertainment” – Bernard Poolman

 

Life is NOT about any of what we have believed it to be about thus far – is Life about working your entire life until you die, having only made enough money to get by? No. Is Life about seeking to be accepted within a certain social-stratum in order to believe that you are now ‘worthy’ and ‘valuable’ in life? No – Who has placed such concepts like ‘value’ upon life to begin with!? We have. We are responsible for it, without any question.

 

Thus, what have we enslaved us to: to spawn beings that will be wrought by the ‘rules of the system’ wherein if you look like someone that would not ‘break a plate’ – which is stealing, cheating, deceiving, abusing in order to thrive – then you are seen as  a threat to the dog-eat-dog world. And it is fascinating that I had not seen this as clear as it is until today. Have a look at your matrix personality designs wherein ‘nerds’ or clear-headed kids are bullied because they are not ‘playing the game’ and fighting toward others to ‘get to be the king of the hill.’ I mean, they are relegated to being some anomaly that must be exterminated – and that’s how by default, only the ones that dared to play the game become part of the successful-stories of humans that ‘make it’ – those that didn’t dare to do the same,  remain secluded and ostracized. This is the proof of how the ‘rules of the game’ are in fact evil.

 

“Is the drive for profit a fear not fully realized yet? Or do those that thrive in the system place profit above all morality as they belief the less the consumer know, the less the possibility of fear?”
Bernard Poolman

 

No positivity will ever change the world because how can any form of ‘goodness’ be created upon a thick layer of slaves that are working 18 hours a day for you to have your latest iPad, which is a ‘symbol of success,’ success that you seek with such positivity and light-loving nature of asking it to the universe – Who is the real evil in this world to neglect the abuse and suffering that ‘successful lifestyles’ are based upon?

 

Not wanting to step out of the love and light illusion should be considered as a crime against life. There is no worse sickening bullshit being peddled around other than ‘seeking your next greatest excitement’ while having over half of the world suffering for not having the least to have a dignified living condition.

 

Do we have to go as far as having to lose it all in order to open our eyes to see the LIE we have created as an illusion of life? Do we have to get to the bottom of our self-created pit and exist in regret for the rest of our existence because of having neglected the reality that is HERE as ourselves, as our world? I say no – stand up from your meditation cushion, take off the blindfold, be part of the ones that stop nagging and inducing others to be abusive to thrive in this world, that stop pretending that living is achieving the ultimate status of a famous and powerful person while neglecting the lives that had to be enslaved to build such empire of dirt.

 

Time to wake up– we are here and ready to Stop All Fears in our Reality as this is the KEY to realize how much we have feared each other. Dare to be Self-Honest to stop being a happy-positive cogwheel that churns on fears and desires and self-induced needs that are not actually related to actual-living at all.

You don’t need love, you don’t need light, you don’t need ‘God’ – all you require is having the courage to live in Self Honesty which is not about ‘doing the right thing,’ but going through a process of self-investigation to see what we are participating in that is keeping the current system of abuse in place, and how to correct ourselves to create a reality that’s best for all, daring to expose the lies that we have ‘lived’ thus far and actually do something about it.

 

“The message of God uses the Fear of God to drive followers to the Love of God. This confirms that the source of Love is Fear. The world is Evidence that Love will never conquer Fear.” – Bernard Poolman

cara1

 

 

 

Suggested read:

Jack – The Courage to live Self-Honestly

Books:

Spirituality Under the Microscope – Volume 1

Audio Interviews:

Money is the Light of God on Earth

Stopping being self-whacking bubbles

The one thought that you give attention to, the thought that will become your driver.

It may seem impossible to ‘snap out of it’ while being driven at 200 km/h by a thought within an entire plethora of memories as pictures, sounds, smells, words, colors, people – it really did seem difficult to realize that I am actually able and capable of stopping that in one single breath as a constant and continues living-application of simply not allowing myself to ‘go inflate the bubble’ but rather burst it and remain here, grounded, breathing.

 

Imagine enraged people fighting against each other suddenly realizing that: they can stop the thoughts of hatred towards each other, remove the accumulated grudge and scorn, drop the guns and simply breathe. That’d be a cool movie to create and Holy-wood would simply go bankrupt.

 

Yes, thoughts have become our most-vivid and personalized enter.tamement – forget about personal gadgets and whackgets, this is the real deal man, how else would you then be able to create an entire puffing-up experience of yourself but through thinking, feeling and experiencing yourself as your mind – that addiction, that sole self projection as Ego that we create and go whacking the bubble as our minds that have become the coins in the piggy savings container that is ready to burst – we’ve all contributed to this  bomb that is ready to explode as this time-ticking world is revealing to be standing up. It is us, humans, that must become walking-physical beings, not airy fluffy walls of soap that are easily moved and burst out with a single blow. Let that blow be your breath, here, in every moment. 

 

Now it’s not about the human as the physical being that could actually reduce their current life-style in an 80% and live in simple ways wherein we could essentially become environment-friendly as physical beings instead of creating environment-friendly products and further organic waste– which we produce anyways. There is a solution to that (Equal Money System)

 

What we’ve got to work with is stopping that thought/thinking experience as ‘who we are’ – Literally ponder that, how would the world be if no more history was held at the memory level – there’d be no nations, no hierarchies, no values on ‘more’ or ‘less’ as there’d be no reference points for that, no distinction between one another as there would be no names to honor or hate, there’d be no interest as money would not serve a purpose of keeping accounts in red numbers depicting the fallacy of the current monetary system for the fictional story of the apparent lack that has represented up until now – Money would become an actual living-organism, a functional part of the system that supports life and not drains and sucks everyone dry on endless payrolls.

 

Who has allowed all of this? We have.  And who has deliberately by actual choice  neglected the consequences that we’ve created not only for ourselves at the moment, but for every single living being in this world that we believe don’t have the ability to ‘think’ or ‘speak’, what about the generations to come if we don’t stop the current machinery and create a system that’s literally part of the living process as the physical, that’s best for all – We have done this, now, there’s no time to wallow in pity. Self Forgive and face the music.

 

Our money-mind master must cease to exist as it currently works– within this, all value placed on thoughts, memories, pictures, people, ideas, projections, mind networks of relationships must be annihilated along with the current monetary system that keeps such bubbles in place – take a look at it, what we believe ourselves to be has been made-possible due to the money we have/ we don’t have.

 

Easy example: do you ‘think’ that a person that’s currently “living” in a survival-mode has time to dwell upon emotional turmoil or failed relationships or lost dreams – furthermore, seeking to gain ‘more power’? No, they’re most likely focusing their every moment on continuing breathing and getting any means possible to live such as food, some clean water and a place to spend the night in.

 

A single example on how ludicrous it is to pay-off our apparent  ‘madness’ is giving names to our own accepted and allowed mind-delusion with such nicely placed psychiatric-savvy tags such as ‘social anxiety’, ‘bipolar disorder’ and a long list of so-called mental/personality disorders that are then obviously treated with drugs so that everybody wins and ends up with a happy smile on their fake-face. It can’t obviously be a real solution, yet people see no ‘solution’ other than indulging in chemicals to apparently ‘do the fixing’ that we’re more than able and capable of doing through an actual self-willed process that requires no pills to place into action, but single words as Self to be Lived:

Self Forgiveness.

 

A single process of daring ourselves to be intimate with ourselves for the first time, nurturing ourselves and caring for ourselves to stand up from the pit of self-pity, suffering, hatred, anger, frustration, belittlement, impotence, weakness, ugliness, shyness, self-loathing and self-suffocating experience that is ALL created at the mind level. It is this experience that is mostly existent in all human beings that has been projected as our spiteful, vengeful and absolutely self-abusive monetary system as the world system we’re currently accepting and allowing ourselves to live in.

 

It can only be an act of cynicism to claim we’re NOT responsible for how we are currently existing in this world, not actually realizing that we are the creators of each and every single outcome that has taken place Here and the consequences that go beyond what our eyes can see.

 

When realizing the extent of this, we can only simply STOP from being such whacking bubbles of self-deception and self-infatuated importance and forgive ourselves– because we can’t possibly create a new world upon layers of decadence lived as mind-drones. We can’t possibly go on as we currently are.

 

Stopping that masochism that we exist as in our heads can stop wars in our reality – yes, this is revealing how we are all responsible for what we’ve accepted and allowed within/out of ourselves as this world/ reality.

 

That second chance, that bringing-yourself-back-here is Here for everyone. This is not glorious, this is a Fact. This is the simplicity of stopping our thoughts, emotions, feelings and Pandora’s box will simply be sealed off forevermore.

It is only the rush, the energy, the mind-craving addiction that can keep us wanting more & more from it without realizing the obvious self-abuse that it brings and entails for all – equal and one.

We begin by giving ourselves time to breathe, to stop thinking and dare to walk mind-bare here, breathing ourselves through time and space.  That’s the real deal – suggest you try it out and you’ll see how one by one we can set us free.

This is 100% doable, we’re walking it – Are You?

 

 

 

Desteni


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