Tag Archives: stop

424. The Importance of Resolve

 

Sometimes we embark ourselves in a decision to change something about ourselves, to stop a particular abusive pattern, to align an aspect of our behavior or to cut ties with particular relationships, however what tends to happen is that we’re not entirely successful with this endeavor if we are missing a key ingredient to make it work: resolution.

 

 

This came up as I was writing on a personal matter that has ‘haunted’ me in my dreams for a long time now in relation to a specific past relationship in my past,  and I have been throughout time applying self forgiveness on the various aspects that mostly come up in dreams and I have wondered: but why is this STILL coming up? Isn’t it sufficient to have walked on this point for over seven years whenever the same comes up? And so I was looking at the word that I was missing, a clue on what I wasn’t fully considering in this process applied to this particular past relationship and the word is Resolve – and as I was reading the definition of course it clicked: I require to have an unwavering, firm, absolute stand in relation to the actual closure of this point within me in my mind and the decision of who I decide to be toward this point in my reality.

What I realized is that I had probably written a lot about it and I understand the reasons why it comes up, but it’s funny that I made it a bit something ‘more than myself’ as if it was something ‘more powerful’ or ‘sticky’ in a way that made me still dream about the same point in various ways and perceive it as something that would take ‘forever’ to let go of  or give closure too, and even speculated on why this point is ‘so strong’ which is not recommended lol, well at least it brings up further points for self forgiveness on other ideas, beliefs, perceptions as the reasons we give ourselves to make the point ‘more than us.’ However, as I was reading the definition of resolution, it all clicked, the simplicity of the solution was in fact in the word resolution: I realized that I had in fact left some kind of ‘open back door’ in my mind wherein I could still in some unconscious way ‘leave a possibility open’ for me to still hold on/cherish these memories just for the ‘benefit of it’ due to the value that I had given to that relationship specifically when it comes to the starting point of such relationship and what I believe ‘it gave me’ which was related to in this case, a perception of getting ‘acceptance’ and ‘worth’ from another, which were words I hadn’t lived as myself then.

So, what am I really missing then here which is what I will now commit to live as myself around this point? Resolution, which is giving an actual closure, having the resolve means having the firm and unwavering  stand and decision to fully let go and fully stop participating in entertaining the memories around this point, which I have actually been working on these past months since I wrote the blog on: 416. Relationships: Not about the Taste, but the Nutrients – however I do recognize that specifically on this topic, there hasn’t been like an absolute, full resolution to stop all attempts of me in my mind going back again on the subject, which even shows up in dreams at times.  This will be then a process of being fully diligent with not entertaining the same point, not ‘feeding’ it even by associating places, things, colors to that same construct of that part of my past which I’ve defined as ‘haunting’ which of course is not that it is ‘haunting me’ but rather how I have entertained it/ fed it for far too long even if the actual relationship is no longer part of my life.

I have to stand in full resolve to do this, there is no ‘middle way’ here and in a way I’ve seen this as the ‘toughest’ point thus far because it seems to ‘still be there’ no matter how much I have written about it – but I do fully see that it will take absolute discipline to stop revamping memories and experiences for my ‘personal consumption’ in a literal manner.

 

 

resolve

  verb

1  settle or find a solution to. Medicine cause (a symptom or condition) to heal or disappear.

2  a firm decision. a formal expression of opinion or intention agreed on.

3  Music cause (a discord) to pass into a concord during the course of harmonic change.

4  (resolve something into) reduce a subject or statement by mental analysis into (separate elements or a more elementary form). chiefly Chemistry separate into constituent parts or components.

5  (of something seen at a distance) turn into a different form when seen more clearly. (of optical or photographic equipment) separate or distinguish between (closely adjacent objects). technical separately distinguish (peaks in a graph or spectrum).

6  Physics analyse (a force or velocity) into components acting in particular directions.

  noun

1  firm determination.

 

 

 

ORIGIN

          Middle English (in the senses ‘dissolve, disintegrate’ and ‘solve a problem’): from Latin resolvere, from re- (expressing intensive force) + solvere ‘loosen’.

 

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to apply ‘full resolve’ to some points in my life, but those toward which I had built a ‘sentimental attachment’ then believe that I can somehow ‘leave around’ in the back of my head as if they were really ‘a part of me,’ instead of realizing that it is in those points that I keep myself ‘locked’ into aspects of myself as ‘my past’ that have no space in my current reality other than in my mind – therefore, I see that the moment that I allow myself to go into one single moment of ‘acceptance and allowance’ and/or indulgence of memories, thoughts, experiences, links to that one point in my past as memories, I reactivate the whole construct once again. Thus,

I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to believe that this point was ‘more than myself’ because it had come up over and over again and even in dreams, not realizing that even if I was writing it all out, I recognize that I am not yet living this absolute resolve to change this one point specifically in ALL dimensions, including the obvious tendency to still ‘give into’ the memory in dreams.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not yet be fully diligent and stand in equal resolution to who I am when awake in my dreams, because I have defined in an unconscious way dreams to be the ‘last memory bastion’ wherein I could still have ‘my enjoyment’ about things, people, experiences that are no longer here in my reality – thus I realize that I have to fully let go of this false ‘enjoyment’ in dreams and realize that every moment that I indulge even in dreams around the same point, I make it part of my reality again.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to still ‘indulge’ into memories and experiences around this particular point in my life through dreams and even more so to want to keep sleeping whenever this point emerges in my dreams, instead of realizing that it is because I haven’t fully made  a decision to not participate in anything that has to do with this one point that the dreams occur as the obvious reflection of my suppression around it, of the denial of myself still wanting to ‘keep’ this point in my mind and believing that ‘I got it all under control’… but this is not really about ‘control’ but being willing to absolutely stop participating in memories, links, thoughts, experiences, dreams and any sort of nostalgia of the past around this particular point.

I realize that it is not that the point has ‘kept me locked’ but that I have been the one giving all of this energy and resistance to it throughout a long time and because I haven’t been absolutely living the resolution to stop it, it’s been a recurrent dream, a recurrent point in my mind-reality which of course has nothing to do with who I am here in physical reality any longer.

 

I commit myself to fully stop all thoughts, all memories, all experiences, all yearnings around this point. This is it and I’ll be the one knowing how effective I am in this stance and resolution on this point, as I realize that I am the only one that creates the haunting , not ‘the point’ itself.

 

 

So it’s interesting that in order to give resolution to something, to ‘solve it’ is to actually loosen it, to let go of it with a firm and unwavering decision to actually do so, to live that decision in every moment that I see I slack on the same point and allow myself to ‘wander’ around it again. I realize that resolution is what I require to apply within me as an absolute stance of who I decide to be if I am already now witnessing what happens when I don’t have an absolute resolve around stopping something within me. Thus, it’s a matter of absolutely just doing it, living it – but not allow just ‘bits’ here and there as that one single ‘bit’ of indulgence reactivates the whole construct once again, I make it part of myself, of my moment here which has nothing to do with myself and my reality any longer – it’s just memories that I have given fuel and importance to, that I have fed with energy to continue defining me according to ‘my past’ which doesn’t make any sense at all because this process is not about ‘fixing my past’ but changing who I am in relation to it.

 

So hereby I establish how in order to resolve something that I haven’t been ‘solving’ in an effective manner, is to check my resolution on stopping/changing or aligning myself in relation to that particular point I want to change/stop and align in my life. So simple, yet as it is said: the devil is in the details.

 

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Watch:

Desteni Movie Night – Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

Read:

Day 56: Letting Go of an Old Flame

 

The Free Desteni I Process Lite course is a first platform of self-support to learn more about ourselves, our mind and understand how we can practically improve our potentials and skills.

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Day 7– Deconstructing Sugar

Yesterday we had a chat with regards to food and quitting sugar, which is a point I have been consciously procrastinating due to the extent of the relationship that I have created with all things that create a sense of satisfaction, which are related to: sugar! I wrote out yesterday how obvious it was in my body experiencing the rush of sugar, I have made vlog about it as well in the past and I ‘reduced’ sugar for a while, then went back to it or at least not giving specific self-direction to the point, which was leaving the back door open for me to go in and out whenever I wanted.

 

This is about me as the creator of my own preferences, quirks and chemical addictions such as sugar. I am aware that this point is ‘far more extensive’ than any other relationship I’ve had, as this is about food that I’ve become so used to eating and ‘sweetening’ my life with, wherein it obviously at times became the ‘consolation price’ for all emotional down-loops, which is the most common way to divert my attention from what’s here.

 

I also realize that the last time that I was talking with my mother about sugar and stopping it, she told some something like ‘oh don’t be so hard in yourself, it’s not like you won’t ever eat anything with sugar ever again’ and in that, I could see how I gave myself this leeway to keep eating it as ‘the only pleasures left in life.’ I have also defined myself or creating myself a reputation for liking sugary things, specially when it comes to going out with my parents and having the opportunity to eat apfel strudel, lol my perdition.

 

I have to forgive myself the relationships that I build with the people that I buy food from. An example is stopping a relationship with a woman in the bakery as that friendliness is what kept me going to such bakery even if it was definitively more expensive than others. But then, I’ve created yet another relationship with other people where bread was cheaper and I made a habit of buying the same bread which lead the people there know what I like and identify me as the predictable robot I’ve become when it comes to buying items. God, the same in the supermarket actually… What is this revealing to me? That I have also compromised myself to buy and consume based on the relationships that I create with people and how they ‘identify me’ according to what I buy.

 

I cannot continue compromising myself in any way. I mean, if I walk past the bakery on a daily basis and I won’t buy there any longer, I might as well go in there to let them know that I won’t be buying bread from them as I have to take care of my sugar addiction. LOL

 

I realized how I have allowed sugar in my life as a ‘treat’ and I would deliberately ignore the side effects that I had to ‘endure’ as opposed to the deliciousness that was eating a cake for example. I mean, this should be read as masochism here, I’ve experienced how it is not cool for my body yet I kept doing it.

So in these seemingly ‘making up for’ type of experiences, we accept a LOAD of bs that comes in the form of ‘small allowances’ such as when you buy something and believe that you will be able to keep it for a week, and end up eating the whole thing in a few hours only. Stuff like that is creating the necessary alarms to realize: hello, I am not being the directive principle in my world, I am allowing myself to simply indulge into it for the comfort I experience within my body as I consume food that is ‘sweet.’

Ludicrous, we have created relationships toward food of course, and in that we have made of such a vital point an addiction, which is just an outflow of having made of our own thoughts a surrogate living as well as the emotions and feelings tied to ‘living’ as well as eating.

 

So let’s begin with that:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to link sugar to a positive experience within my body wherein I have associated everything that is sugary as something that I ‘like’ by default and that I cannot say ‘no’ to, without realizing that as I stand as the directive principle within me, I have to create such ability to not be driven by a mental desire to eat sugar, but instead discipline myself to support my body with meals that are not creating me an ‘instant gratification’ such as sugary meals.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a self-definition base on it being ‘too difficult’ to quit sugar which means I was giving up before even trying it, which is ‘the’ point of self interest as a nice-fluffy experience that I can get from eating sugar, which I must now discipline myself to re-direct in a supportive manner, which is the process that I’ll be walking as I face this point.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to let go of the idea of me being a sucker for desserts and specially, apfel strudel that I have defined as my favorite dessert of all time. I realize that deserting of myself as the idea of being an ‘apfel strudel sucker’ is something that I must let go of in order to stop existing as that energetic tie to it as a picture in my head of what I ‘enjoy,’ without realizing how much backchat it would occupy in my mind when being abroad and not able to get that specific apfel strudel that I like.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a thinking-relationship to getting the treats that I ‘like’ and in that, using my mind to continuously manipulate myself into getting that ‘quick fix’ of eating something sweet, without actually taking into consideration what sugar is and what it actually does to my body.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to procrastinate giving direction to stopping sugar because of fearing ‘missing out the sweetness of life’ by stopping eating sugar and bread and all of which I had created a relationship defined as ‘comfort’ and ‘consolation,’ which is mostly a coping mechanism when I am not willing to face myself a certain point that I am allowing to accumulate within me as backchat –  have resorted to instead cover it up by using something sweet to eat to neglect the actual experience that I am creating within myself and go into a sense of ‘satisfaction’ after it.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create relationships of giving myself ‘rewards’ or ‘treats’ that I would create a relationship toward as that energetic longing for it, which is how I require to stop and see who I am without such treats and how I am able to replace such sugary treats with vegetables and other meals that are supportive and nutritional other than a piece of bread.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become addicted to the sensation of chewing something that I have defined as ‘whole’ and ‘filling’ such as bread in my mouth and stomach.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to neglect the common sense that something that is altering my physical body to a sense of discomfort while digesting it, is simply not cool for my body and that I should stop it, yet instead allowed me to ‘swallow’ the side effects because of considering it to be the ‘consequences to bear’ for having such a pleasant and delightful taste in my mouth – and mind – out of eating something sweet.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to eat something that I know beforehand won’t support my physical body providing actual nutrients,  but instead allowed me to abuse my body to digest such gulps of sugar ‘just because of liking the flavor/ taste’ of it, and the sense of comfort and fulfillment that I would get out of it, which is my mind creating an energetic experience out of eating, which is certainly Not supportive at all.

 

I am here to support my physical body and that means stopping that which I have researched, realized and experienced in my body to be equal to  poison that makes my entire blood rush throughout my veins in an abnormal pace, which means that I am forcing and exhilarating my physical functioning at some level that is Not supportive for myself.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to abuse my organs and my physical body that had to digest such amounts of sugar and me neglecting the actual strain that I’ve experienced to digest sugars, yet allowed it in the name of pleasure and a ‘piece of heaven’ such as when eating bread, cakes, apfel strudel and cookies – and in a lesser value: chocolate.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself for having created such ‘untouchable’ items in my diet like eating bread and consuming that which is always ‘nice to grab a bit from,’ because of wanting to fulfill and satiate the usual sugar cravings that I have accepted and allowed myself to become addicted to – yes, I must realize that I am dealing here with a life long dependency as the acceptance of sugar within me as a stimulant to create a sense of ‘feeling good,’ no different to seeking love and light, really.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to link the idea of sugar to ‘being cared for/ being appreciated/ being pampered/ being spoiled’ from the relationship of getting such sugary stuff from my parents whenever I go to visit them.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to place value in a person that I met and made me 5 different types of cakes for my birthday and equating that to ‘care’ and ‘appreciation.’

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a dependency to eat ‘sweet stuff’ such as bread or sweet rice in order to give myself ‘a bit of a reward’ during the day, as if I had to be consoled and fulfilled with such moments of eating ‘sugary stuff’ equated to ‘me caring for myself,’ without realizing that such sugar has no nutritional value at all and that it is certainly not necessary within my every day diet. Thus, I walk the process to prove to myself that I can continue living without eating these obvious items that contain high levels of sugar.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to resist quitting sugar and having procrastinated it for such a long time, because of fearing missing out on that which I have defined as ‘the most enjoyable stuff’ as eating something that I can have a sense of fulfillment through and as sugar.

 

I know it is possible to stop as some other Destonians have shared their on processes of stopping sugar and I could see myself just keeping quiet throughout the chat because I resisted placing a commitment to do the same and stop eating the most obvious items that contain sugar – there is also a point of ‘oh what if I ‘fail’?- but I can’t, because I’ve made decisions to quit other stuff in my life that was obviously addictive – including people and activities. I also understand that the relationship I’ve created with sugar is quite a ‘tough one’ in relation to how I have accepted myself as always requiring something ‘sweet’ to end the meals with, even if it was a sip of some juice or ‘fiber cookies’ or some other ‘taste’ that I could satisfy my desire to EXPERIENCE the sugary taste in my mouth as ‘the final taste.’

 

I have recently cut eating yogurt which had been part of my self-religion in food, it’s probably a month of that already – I tried quitting milk right away but my body went absolutely aloof, so I’m still drinking it in a very reduced manner – this is also in relation to the processes we’re walking and how we require to support our physical in relation to the meals I have been so used to eating and that I cannot just ‘cut out’ overnight. 

 

And so, I commit myself to stop eating any sugary stuff – specifically bread which I have defined as a ‘filler’ in both a physical and experientially speaking as that moment of actually chewing the bread as a ‘relief,’ as a satiating moment that I have defined as ‘giving myself a treat’ due to the obvious amounts of sugar it contains.

 

Sugar is a must stop – there are diabetics in both sides of my family. Actually I know that my grandmother died of diabetes and my sister – when she was little – would hand her chocolates in a secretive manner until she died. So, I see myself in that mirror and realizing that I do have a predisposition to being a sugar junky – the same with my other grandmother that is also dead and would be a yogurt junky, lol.

So, evidence proves that I must stop sugar, I have been also more aware of this sensations that food produce within me and yesterday I went to the shop and bought some greens and vegetables, which is something that I was only buying every now and then. I also realize that I will take the opportunity to find out how my body works without rice – which has become ‘the main meal’ in my diet – yet it makes absolute sense that it does turn into sugar as any other grain, including wheat. I knew this from my sister – who is a nutritionist – yet I continued fooling myself because of the routine, remaining in the status quo with what I eat – I  mean this uncovers how I tend to make of my days a bit of a ritualistic movement – however it’s going much better.

I am not as obsessed with cleaning as I was before, and having everything ‘perfectly’ around me, I am less concerned about ‘how things look’ around me yet I have to be aware of making it functional as well. And so, within this entire point of walking the physical process, something that Bernard said got stuck in me the other day in relation to creating patterns and habits that are supportive as we are now walking the physical process. Thus I realize that it is the ‘perfect time’ to establish that which I am willing to maintain as a living-experience in the physical as myself.

 

I have made a habit of buying bread as the only ‘treat’ I give to myself. I walked it in a mind construct a few months ago, lol and I only stopped going to ‘that’ bakery that I wrote the mind construct about, but then found a cheaper one which made it easier for me to have access to bread again. So, I realize that identifying all the points is key and I am perfectly aware when I make the ‘decision’ or should I say when I indulge-into stopping by the bakery and buying bread. I usually associate it with a reward system that I have created for myself in relation to what I eat – which I took as ‘normal’ as in ‘giving myself a treat’ but I see that I can become quite sneaky when it comes to these allowances and not really disciplining myself to it.

 

However, I am taking it bit by bit, I do take my body into consideration to reduce the amounts of it little by little as I’ve seen how cutting down meals that I had built myself of can be quite disturbing in an overall physical experience that is not comfortable at all.

 

I also realize that I must increase meat consumption with that, which I can only see I have limited myself to because of money – so there you go! our experience, nutrition and relationship to food is directly linked to how much money we have. I am perfectly aware that I could buy all of such variety if I had the money to do so, and seek for organic stuff that is absolutely expensive here. So, at the moment I’ll seek for the best options which means buying more vegetables, which are certainly not expensive.

 

So, thanks for all that have shared their experiences with stopping sugar, that is the type of support and ‘inspiration’ that I required because this is one of the points that absolutely goes ‘against Marlen’s will’ I mean, me the cookie-girl no way! – lol yes I once sold cookies during summer time with my cousins and called ourselves ‘cookie girls’ – we would bake cookies and sell them to our neighbors, it was quite fun but we obviously would eat the remains and so, that was not supportive at all.

 

This point of liking desserts is yet another ‘chunk’ of myself that I have created and continued to generate as a positive experience – I mean, I’m glad that I have come to build a taste for vegetables – thanks to my mother that would nag me to do so – but now I have to actually get rid of that which would ‘console’ my desire to experience something ‘sweet’ within me. So I’ll continue walking this point as I go, for now this is it.

 

I commit myself to being this process of cutting down sugar to eventually be able to stand and see that I am still here after quitting all major sources of sugar in my daily diet.

 

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2012 What’s your Mark?

What has ‘marked you’ in your life? If you ask yourself this question you might come up with a memory, a moment in your life that ‘changed it all’ for you. Does that define who you are? Another answer would be having physical marks that could indicate the walk in time-space wherein our physical body starts to deteriorate according to the current experience of ‘getting older’ – does that define your current experience in any way? Marks are also qualifications, standards, requirements, symbols, representations, points of reference – setting up marks as goals can also be applied the same way, competing against ourselves. In essence, we could say they are imprints that we create and regard as a reminder of something, someone, identifying ourselves with a particular something/ someone for the sake of keeping track of ourselves.

There’s also a general desire to ‘leave a mark’ in this world – that’s almost the type of purposes we all had, whether it is going toward the usual success and pursuit of happiness associated with fame and glory, or the opposite polarity as becoming that point that leaves a mark as a reminder of everything that is wrong in society; that’s for example how serial killers have remained as transcendental beings for showing/ revealing the extremes of the accepted and allowed ‘human nature,’ they played out the reality that we have secluded and kept ‘secret’ within ourselves – they became the manifestation of what has existed in every single being’s mind as the idea of harm, abuse and violence toward ourselves/another. Such beings have tainted/ left a mark in human history that can be regarded as ‘negative’ – however we have all been the creators of such actions, regardless of the initial point of denial to take Self Responsibility for this that may come up while reading these words.

Some others seek to leave a ‘great mark’ in their lifetime, becoming someone ‘outstanding’ and influencing this reality in a  ‘positive’ way – these are people that are usually honored/ reminded in society as benevolent beings. From here all the delusional stages of light and bliss, god, angels, positivity, good vibes and the divine stem from, never ever questioning how it is that we have created of ourselves heroes and villains just to maintain a fuckedup status quo of ‘good vs. evil’ that apparently keeps everything in ‘balance’ which implies that the friction is not eradicated.

We can see that it is such desire for peace/ balance/ harmony that we are  not supporting ourselves to consider the root and cause of everything that goes on in our reality that is currently not supporting life, not supporting our expression, but only existing as beings that are always apparently subject to experiencing the highs and lows of ‘reality.’

As much as we would like to neglect the following, it must be said: it is within our little bubble (mind) wherein we walk a lifetime trying to ‘leave a mark’ in this world. We become so self-absorbed in our own realm of oddities and stories as the personal mythology that we neglect the world that is here, physically revealing to ourselves what happens when we stop watering a plant: it dies. This is a single example of how this reality had been specifically designed to keep us all well entertained with our own mind – and the relationships we have formed in it – as a form of never questioning or even having the least consideration to look at other beings’ life-experiences in this same world. Opening our eyes to see how it is that we spent our lives trying to create an effigy of ourselves in the name of whatever we believed in – and wanted to be ‘reminded’ for –  is only another mindfuck that reveals to what extent we as humanity have neglected reality while seeking to outdo our personal scores, to leave our mark.

Winning, competing, striving, fighting, outdoing, overcoming are actions that imply a necessary effort to accept a starting point of ‘adversities’ that we have accepted and allowed as ‘how life is.’ Isn’t this world now looking like a rat race in a labyrinth wherein each one is only trying to find the most ‘outrageous’ way to get through it? This comes to mind as I see the usual world that billions are immersed into: entertainment, TV, music industry, fashion, glory, big business, pursuing happiness, being Special.

To me leaving a ‘mark’ is wanting to be Special and exist in any possible way wherein we make ourselves ‘more’ than the rest, become ‘different’ by any possible means wherein we can make sure that we ‘leave a statement’ which is usually  linked to a single belief, a single character we decided to play in our life. Some dedicate their lives to be benevolent, others to play out the villain, others to simply seek happiness regardless of anything that may come on their way.

We have all played out these roles and, at the moment, all of this bs is what’s stepping on top of the lives that have no desire to be ‘special’ or even enough energy to think what type of ‘mark’ they would want to leave in this world, simply because they have no food, no water, they have no house to live in, they have no proper education and they are mostly used to living in constant fight or flight mode, merely surviving or even having to mitigate their daily struggle to live in the physical level using any form of drug – not for ‘recreational processes’ but to stop thinking about being hungry and having no means to feed themselves. The same goes for all the slave workers that dream of ever being able to leave such hideous jobs while having no possibility to do so, leading them to now leave a mark that is mostly a reflection of the consequences we can create in a world that doesn’t support all beings equally: they commit suicide.

I am watching a news report on Homs, the Syrian city that has been extensively terrorized the past weeks with as much as 4 detonations every 5 minutes, a conflict where thousands of people have already died including civilians of course, the usual ‘casualties’ wherein kids have their brains blown off by bombs, wherein people have lost their family and friends already – “Where is the UN?” is the question they ask themselves, where are the so-called ‘Human Rights’ organizations?– We all know that such ‘unity’ is non existent in this world as long as there are interests behind the gears that move this reality. It is obvious that such consistent war is financed for ‘higher purposes’ of control and conquering the territory to have access to the resources, that is also a statement of ‘creating a mark’ in means of showing ‘who’s the boss’ now.  CNN has placed this ‘warning’ sign at the beginning of each segment saying that ‘the graphic nature of the content may not be suitable for all viewers’ – how come this reality is censored when it comes to seeing/ witnessing in a voyeuristic manner the outflows of the human ego trying to take control an entire territory for the sake of money? How could we neglect these events while entertaining ourselves with our personal lifestyles seeking glory and power?

We have accepted such war scenes as ‘normal,’ as ‘part of the necessarily evil in this world’ as some dare to call it.  Yet on the other side of the coin, people mourn the ‘loss of a star’ in the entertainment industry while celebrating with pompous awards wherein people carry thousands of dollars on top of themselves to look ‘great,’ to leave and set a mark in the world, to win something. This is the type of madness we are living in – yet all I see is that who I am in this world as part of it all is linked to such entertainment industry, because I consume it one way or another  – I am not apparently linked to anything that goes on in the middle East, yet I use the same money and resources  that are the ‘hidden causes’ of such wars.

‎”If suffering were payment for karma, the elite would be in hell in every breath. The system of money as it now exist proves that karma is not functional in this world at all at the moment.” – Bernard Poolman

I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again: we are living in a bi-polar world. I cannot still fathom how anyone that is willing to pay over a 1000 dollars for a pair of shoes can neglect this entire reality wherein people are starving and could eat for several months with such amount of money – how low can we go? The same can be applied to someone that could only seek to harm and abuse others to make evident the already accepted and allowed abuse, yet only wanting to perpetuate themselves as a character that did this in order to ‘make a statement,’ which is how the regular terrorist organizations work and function like. Either poles and all the stages in between, are not supporting ways wherein all beings could actually unite for the very first time within a single principle to establish equal possibilities to Live,  having a constant and consistent form of support that could place all in an equal ground to LIVE.

I mean, come on! All our system of ‘leaving a mark’ just to be reminded in a certain person’s mind, in a history book, in a certain piece of reality for the sake of exalting ourselves as the ego that we have only existed within/ as our minds, must cease to exist, because it is in this very pursuit of a goal that we end up forgetting about anyone and everything in this world. This is how we turn ‘the world’ into a me-myself-and-I situation within a limited scope of reality comprised in our mind.

What would be the ‘mark’ that I would like to create in this world? Leaving a mark that would ‘taint’ everyone with a self-honest realization of having to live by the principle of what’s best for all in order to stop the current accepted madness in this world. The mark would be living as the example of what is possible if we set a single goal for humanity: Walking a lifetime dedicating myself to create a world that’s best for all, a world wherein the future generations can come and finally stop the recrimination and projection of blame to the ‘ones that came before them,’ because of not having done anything to stop the cycles of abuse and disregard of life in this reality.

I’m looking at and being part of a very strange phenomena that is already leaving a ‘trace/ mark’ in this world and this is what we are doing as Destonians, as people that are  paving a non-existent road in this world which is walking the way to establish Self-Equality in all forms/ ways in this reality.

How to transform the world from this manic-driven self-inflicted ego possessions of importance, competition, rivalry, superiority and general madness wherein we have made ourselves to accept inequality, injustice and wars in the name of progress? We place and create ourselves as the solution: we stop within ourselves existing as that constant coming and going between poles of right and wrong, good and bad, as that friction and struggle that we create at a mind level and stand as the point that allows the world to see that: we don’t have to seek answers and solutions outside of ourselves, we must become the point that stops and corrects the current ‘human nature’ we are still playing out.

If we look at the marks in the bodies of people  from having to experience war and be part of the set of ‘casualties’ within a careless money-driven conflict, such marks can only remind us one single thing: we cannot perpetuate a world that is biased in nature, that is bipolar and has lost all sense of regarding any other being as oneself, losing a sense of reality while being indoctrinated with what media, society, educational systems have  told us that ‘we should be’ which is not based or even pointing at the necessary implementation of an Equal World  – at all.

Do people that have no money have an option to ‘leave a mark’ in this world’? As harsh as it may sound, they do – only as part of a number in a statistic of people that are living in poverty, that are starving, have no means to aspire for a better living condition or have died in a war.

Turn your TV on, glance through all the channels, see the variety of realities that are fictional and real that we are creating as a reflection of ourselves in this world. We don’t have to go that far to look ‘outside’ for that madness and general chaos – we just have to look within ourselves in our minds: that’s where the chaos begins. This is how we begin a process of Self Honesty to investigate how and why we are participating in the current reality in such selfless manners until we become the point that Stops.

The one and only mark as the final goal of each one of us is one and equal = establish Life in Equality for all, self-forgiving all our personal-scores to create and leave the ‘best mark of it all,’  the best mark that could ever and should only exist is: Equality as Life – right now, we only carry the mark of having accepted and allowed a world of abuse.

Time to open our eyes, time to start looking at what we accept and allow in our world, what do we occupy our mind with, how much do we actually ‘care’ about our own personal-marks as the constant competition to become someone ‘better,’ instead of simply vowing ourselves to live a lifetime of self-support for ourselves and for the rest of this existence that is now crying out for ‘help,’ which can only come if we all work together and stand up for Life.

We are all responsible, it is impossible to deny this any longer.

Choose Life.

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Burst the bubble @ desteni.org


Some Deep-shit to bring afloat

If you want to reach a state of bliss, then go beyond your ego and the internal dialogue. Make a decision to relinquish the need to control, the need to be approved, and the need to judge. Those are the three things the ego is doing all the time. (So) It’s very important to be aware of them every time they come up.”
~Deepak Chopra

If – then – so

Thanks for confirming our preprogrammed reality, Deepak! Using fuzzy logic is definitely accurate if we want to continue perpetuating ourselves in a reality motivated only by a sense of ulterior pleasure that is, apparently, that which we must conquer if we want to be in an ever-lasting dazzlement as the ultimate quest in life.
 
So, get rid of any sense of self-motivation as self-realization of being self responsible for everything that is here as our own creation and directing yourself accordingly – listen to Chopra as he places the attractive solution to kill your ego to ‘reach a state of bliss’ I mean, what else could drive a human being to stop the inherent addictive habit of thinking? Only thinking of a blissful glazing experience where I don’t ‘think’ and I’m this empty vessel shining in full view. Wow
The reason why such statement is bullshit is because it is promoting an elusive state of being that functions like candy to kids that have been taught that candy is the reward for doing something ‘good’ in this world. Then, stopping the mind just in a literal ‘shut-the-fuck-up’ attitude creates nothing else but further separation that can only lead the being to completely deny themselves ‘as’ those thoughts, as the actual creator of such ego-treats wherein the actual understanding of self-creation is deliberately overlooked. Within this premise, it won’t matter whatever ‘I think’ because I can simply ‘shut it off’ and shove it under the carpet while gaining one step closer to the virtual paradise-heaven like experience.

Okay, so, you shut off your thoughts and any desire/ need to create any sense of ego recognition BUT motivate that through wanting to reach an experience that can only be relevant for you as an Ego, how paradoxical mr. Chopra.

The point is that this person knows what SELLS WELL in spirituality, which is following the long-lasting desire for ‘heaven’ and a more decent life experience other than what the usual mortal-mode allows us to do so. This lies obviously within the ultimate ‘wanna be god’ experience that can only be relevant to the individual as the mind, as feelings and emotions which is what this guy is attempting to ‘warn you about’ as in  ‘be aware of them’ without even considering any best for all or consideration of the entire world or even life for that matter within such blissful promotion of any deceptive kind of “self-help” that people buy nowadays.

I’ve had some people asking me if ‘I know Chopra’ whenever I speak about what we do at Desteni – I sincerely don’t need to know much about someone once I see what a single statement of them is promoting as ‘self help’ or ‘life philosophy’ which in this case is quite clear it’s nothing else but a revamp of the old ‘heavenly experience’ promoted by christianity – or any simile in the rest of this world’s cults-religions. That sells well, self responsibility and self honesty don’t. Yet it’s what must be done and lived in this world for any actual change.

So, reaching a ‘state of bliss’ is a glowing mindfuck that can only be relevant to you as an individual experience of the mind without actually caring to see how such experience is self-created, powered by your own thoughtful-batteries which in itself, contradicts the rest of the argument Deepak gives in order to ‘stop your ego/ stop your mind’ without even caring to look at the context of this world, this reality that we’ve created as a casino wherein everyone wants to WIN/WIN all the time and nevermind about the world problems that are created in-fact by such long-lasting desires to be bliss-fool.

We obviously don’t support this type of bullshit that promotes abdication of self responsibility, ignorance of man to know himself and the determination of seeking something ‘outside’ of yourself as a mental experience that keeps everyone trapped in a single cycle of buy-your-peace, buy-your-happiness becoming blind to see what is actually being created by each one of us in and as this world that’s actually run by nothing else than money.

Time to debunk Chopra and any other ‘self-help guru’ that fails to see Equality as Life, Common Sense and the requirement for an overall change in the system if we do want to do something that betters our lives in this world, not just ‘for me’ but for ALL Equally.

 

Get your reality check at  desteni.co.za  and support the Equal Money System so that ALL are included in your quest for a blissful experience as an actual self-sustainable system that supports LIFE not the mind.

 


The End is No Quick-Fix

Part of the reasons why I got to Desteni was because I had been driven by a desire to know of the occult, the prophecies and obviously the infamous 2012 of which I created a great belief and would even dare to claim it was a ‘certainty’ that the world would end by 2012 – lol this I’d speak vehemently about in school, high school to be precise and in English class.

So, this drive for spirituality, seeking for truths and the entire 2012 myth were the points that got me to Desteni. The single idea of ‘ending it all’ was something I had thought about from an early age – seeing ‘no other way out’ to this reality other than ‘destroying it all’/ ‘giving an end to this world’.

Well, it turns out that: there is No Quick-Fix such as ending the world and just having it all be ‘washed away’ – that’s also ‘hoping’ and not actually realizing that it is only through our own limitations that we’d like to ‘cease to exist’ without having even Lived For Real – now I see it sounds ludicrous because yes in a way what must end is our lives as preprogrammed systems yet instead of just having it all be destroyed, we’ve got to now direct ourselves to Live and create solutions for this world wherein all living beings can coexist.

So, here I am exposing how it is that within the depths of myself I’d still be hoping that there would be a quick fix such as life on Earth just suddenly ending. When looking at the reasons why I’d want this it becomes obvious that wanting to avoid the responsibility of cleaning up the mess comes up, avoiding having to walk in actual time-space this entire lifetime and others to co-create proper living conditions on Earth. In terms of facing myself it would also become easier not having to continue ‘overcoming myself’ as a human being.

This post was mostly triggered by reading the following post at the forum http://desteni.co.za/intro-forum/viewtopic.php?f=24&p=5188#p5188by Sunette upon an article placed there talking about the cataclysms and all the ‘signs of the times’ about the end of the world:

“This, is the delusion of ‘believing in hope’ – that, human-beings will ‘miraculously’ transition into ‘higher planes of existence’ from the manifested-consequence as accepted and allowed abuse we’ve done-onto ourselves, each-other the physical as earth, the animal-kingdom.
No – there is and will be No Mercy – we’ll either destroy ourselves together, equal and one with the mess of ourselves and the world, or we’ll practically stand-up, take self-responsibility, stop and change through actual physical-living. The ‘window of opportunity’ for each one is BREATH, HERE in every moment – to change self, to change the world. Participate in the Forums of pushing self to see beyond the delusions/veils of the mind – have the guts to face the REALITY of the situation.
We’re not going to ‘transition’ out of this fuck-up – we’re going to have to face it directly in the physical and change ourselves as it; as this is the creation we have in fact become as ourselves and so the ‘only way out’ – is changing it as ourselves; through practical-directive living.
Prepare yourself – get the tools; live the tools – change self to become a living example of the dignity, integrity and respect we’re capable and able of living towards ourselves, others and the earth – changing self, to change the world.”

This is such a cool message which leaves no window open for opportunists to take a hold of ‘wishing and hoping’ that some alien invasion will come to earth or that some meteorite will hit the Earth killing everyone, or all prophecies coming true and the world ending next year – lol.

Anyways the point is very clear: We’ve got to kill all hope, to stop all delusions possible and to actually have the guts to face the totality of ourselves here – there is no way out. This is probably the message that struck me the most when encountering Desteni and the reason how I got myself writing and applying Self Forgiveness and actually taking self responsibility because I saw how it was in fact so that it would be yet another ‘miracle’ if this world could just end like that – it doesn’t matter if it’s ‘possible’ or not – what matter is that I make sure I don’t leave any possible back doors as a lingering thought of wanting to destroy everything, wanting the world to end as that would mean the party is over and there is no mess left. No.

We are the current mess in this world, we’ve created it so: we take responsibility for it. This is what makes the entire Desteni message so unappealing because part of our infamous human nature is to glide away whenever self-responsibility is required, whenever actual self-confrontation is existent, whenever the truth of what we’ve become starts pouring out through our pores.

While I was at the farm I got to talk to AA and I learned very cool points from her as she’s walked the entire point of ‘wanting to destroy it all’ wherein I realized that we simply have to breathe and walk through that point every time it comes up, it’s not just something that is ‘forever gone’ – it requires constant direction as self to not give into such patterns of wanting to give-up, being ‘fed up with this world’, ‘seeing no solution’, ‘seeing no point in continuing’ – that’s also a point I keep quite present as something I learned at the farm through another’s experience: be the point of your existence whenever you see ‘no point’. This means that we often miss ourselves within it all, we take ourselves for a ride through an overwhelmingness of thoughts, emotions, feelings which is ourselves existing as an experience instead of stopping, focusing here on breath and realizing that the only way to become so ‘uncomfortable’ in our own skin is through all the mind-processes behind such experience/ as the experience itself.

The physical is just here, the physical doesn’t really go wandering about ‘the end of the world’ or ‘self-destructing’ – nope. This single point shows/reveals to what extent we’re all possessed whenever we flirt with such thoughts in our heads.

So – living in a society wherein a large percentage of the population goes day by day living under the effect of a drug to ‘make it till the next day’ implies how there is quite a lot to realize in terms of how we function as the mind, how we are not all those experiences that we create within the mind and thus how it is that if we are really willing to be the change in the world, we require to first straight up our conception of the world and ourselves in it.

Seeing reality for what it is might not be the greatest thing, yet it is within daring to see that one actually opens eyes to that which we’ve missed for such a long time, getting ourselves to the current detrimental position we are as humanity, affecting all life around us.

Seykingumu

It would only be an act of cowardice wanting to end it all – let’s not even go into the self-righteous act of ‘ending you life’ here – yet we’re still waging wars against each other as individuals and nations/ races. – yet we’re still living under the effects of drugs, alcohol, excess or lack of food and any other physical abuse that we could drive ourselves to endure for the sake of being +1 to the demonstration that we’ve got to change our ways as humanity or we’ll inevitably then self-destruct which is then NOT about ‘the world coming to an end’ but ourselves simply walking and facing the manifested consequences of what we’ve allowed to be created by our own hand.

This is where and how Self Forgiveness becomes the greatest gift we can give ourselves, even if at some point we could think ‘we don’t deserve it’ – how else would we give ourselves this second chance if it’s not through our own recognition of us being capable of actually directing all our self-destructive effort into a constructive one?  ‘Not deserving it’ would be only the consideration of ego and not of redeeming all life that we’ve harmed and enslaved in this world.

There will be no aliens, no masters, no blue beams, no prophecies, no second comings other than Equality in this world that can be created and placed by each human being that realizes and understands this is the only way to go if we are willing to actually see that we’ve been limiting ourselves by our own beliefs – mostly linked to money/ the entire current monetary system –  so in essence we’ve got to wake up from our self-created nightmare and start working with what’s HERE as who we are – equal and one. We haven’t yet LIVED and we haven’t yet even pulled-out our fullest potential so, there’s a long way to go yet at last we’ve got a certain outcome – Life in Equality within the context of it all being Best for All.

The more that join in this process, the merrier. Give yourself the chance.

“We can if we dare actually realize that there is that which we can live within space time within a construct of what’s best for all that will have astounding experiences of overwhelming excellence, maybe one should consider that as well” Bernard Poolman

Quote taken from the recording that is suggested to hear:

Too-much-ness — Others call it Overwhelmingness

Thanks for reading and Being Here


‘Reality-Insight and not Mind-feeling’

“All experience is always judgment” – Bernard Poolman

experience
n    noun
1    practical contact with and observation of facts or events.
2    knowledge or skill gained over time.
3    an event or activity which leaves a lasting impression.
n    verb encounter (an event or situation). Øfeel (an emotion).

 

If we understand that we are currently walking-experiences, we can see that everything that we go through is assessed by the mind as an experience – Life is Not an Experience yet we are currently walking as mind-created experiences wherein we can simply stop identifying ourselves as the feeling/emotion/judgmental experience and instead SEE through practical living-application how we can go living ourselves as a point of change – yes, it will still be a mind-perception of yourself yet it will be a more physical experience wherein no more backchat is directing the reality but simple physical living interaction – this is what we’re walking.

 

How we use the tools is to identify ourselves as the experience that we’ve become of thoughts, emotions and feelings and as we go stopping we will still experience ourselves in a certain manner as we are currently existing as mind consciousness systems that assess and value everything according to one’s established parameters – we’re establishing parameters that are aligned with what’s best for all in common sense which certainly creates a guideline of how we are able to practically physically live and still experience ourselves yet not clogged and stuffed with emotions and feelings and useless thoughts, but instead allow ourselves to stand equal to the mind to direct ourselves. That’s what’s here as ourselves hence we direct us to the best possible outcome that’s livable/ walkable in this reality through direct realization of it being in fact so.

 

This is how we realize that all knowledge must go, that all past perceptions as experiences of ‘who we are’ must be self forgiven and let go of because all of them are holds that keep the system in place – we are the system and unless we stop feeding the same constructs and walking in absolute directive principle, we’ll re-create the same patterns over and over again which is in essence recreating the past of self-enslavement with no self-direction consideration.

 

 

“the price that must be paid for our blindness due to experiences” – Bernard Poolman

We’ve disregarded life while wallowing in our mental diseases that we’ve accepted as ‘human nature’ as ‘our life experience’ – this is only one of the reasons why giving up the mind is giving up the actual harm and abuse imposed on to life – it’s only fair that we’ve got to walk now from the consequences of such continued disregard to what is here as ourselves while existing as the helmets on the head.

 

It’s clear that the physical body doesn’t ‘experience’ knowledge or values/ judgments upon comparison, worth imposed over things and people – all of that is but mind-creations, huminds creations that we’ve accepted and allowed ourselves to wallow in. The physical just IS:

“The physical -has no agenda, need to know nothing, is already in full design, and live as it breathes, as it eats, as it fucks, as it touch. The mind – has judgments, reasons, meanings, laws about everything -without actually understanding anything.” – Bernard Poolman

So physical-experience is still an experience yet has nothing to do with the mental schemes of values/worth/judgments that we impose on to that which functions as a vital system – the physical is a vital system that doesn’t require us to ‘think’ to function – example is how body digests and absorbs nutrients without us having to direct a single thing of that process, we’re not even aware of how it all takes place, that’s proof of how detached we are of our own physical body.

 

“mathematics shows that if one follow common sense and NOT experience–we can change the world”
– Bernard Poolman

So, in terms of participation in reality, we’ve got to stick to the physical cross-reference of ourselves, to remain here as breath to simply stop feeding our ‘life as an experience’ and simply walk here with the necessary points to be done.

 

We’ve discussed how the mind-experience is still overriding common sense living which is the physical living wherein everything is ‘there’ for all to see. An experience is only experienced by each one, it’s ‘invisible’, it takes place in the mind of each one – that’s how we’ve lived as separate bubbles as our thoughts, just this globe on our heads that no one sees yet we know ‘it’s there’, creating an alternate experience of what’s Here as our physical body that lives, that exists in simplicity.

 

“when you die–the experience abruptly ends” – BP

So, the point to realize here is that we cannot just stop ourselves being an experience as that would imply we’d have to die – as the above quote presents – so what’s practical here to do? We simply direct ourselves to be living here as the physical, to breathe in and out to literally heal ourselves from all the damage we’ve done to this world, to ourselves as our physical body poisoned by all our mind back-chatter. It is insane that we’ve lived as constant self-abuse machines without ever even pondering if that was ‘natural’ to do – yes, our “human nature” is severely fucked up and not at all in harmony with the physical.

 

Human nature as experience

We can then see how it’s been a HUGE Lie from our world system to identify that the glorious thing about humanity was to possess a mind to think, feel, experience, etc – that is the very thing that allowed us to get into our EGO of the mind and thus possess this world through the marvelous Machiavellic existence as Egos that want to conquer and dominate everything and everyone.

Is that what we want to remain like?

No, absolutely not.

 

So, hereby I express how I am not willing to second the mind in its own glorification, survival and regurgitation – that has simply created hell on Earth and I’d like to quote Bernard once more because these words must be heard everywhere possible:

 

“Ego is the acceptance as self as superior to others in truth and thus the allowance of chaos to find an angle with which to screw all competition till only the ego version of truth remains — then the ego were right and for this, the ego will destroy the planet” – Bernard Poolman

 

We’re walking as all of these points, we are supporting ourselves to become effective in simply stopping ourselves from living as walking-experience and instead get us into a living-physical reality wherein no backchatter exist as directive principle and prime influence over ourselves dictating our experience as ‘who we are’.

We are experiences walking into the living reality – and this is how we’ll continue walking because we see, realize and understand how the humind motivated by internal back-chat has created the current system to be of such abusive and unequal nature, we have seen how the humind in search for new experiences has lead this entire world to the brink of destruction while trying to ‘experience more’ and ‘get more’ which has become the drive for all human action.

 

So from here one when we share ourselves, we’ve got to make sure that we speak from direct-seeing here as part of our physical amalgamation to the reality that is HERE physical and not only sharing the reaction that is mostly emotional/feeling based according to past-patterns that exist as the mind –  as Sunette pointed out

‘Reality-Insight and not Mind-feeling’

 

When we are existing in our mind we are only caring for our personal fulfillment of the idea that we’ve become, we don’t consider the totality of reality that is here as ourselves. By exerting a single opinion or judgment upon this world, we are in fact supporting the existence of such judgment as part of the reality we live in. We’ve become so used to criticize and point-fingers at ‘others’ instead of actually simply dedicating ourselves to STOP from remaining as complaining systems instead of being in fact the solution to all this humind distortion of reality: stopping ourselves from participating in thoughts, feelings, emotions = stopping existing as the mind and start living as the physical.

 

We’ve got to stop living as the Illusion – the ill-uses we’ve placed as value/worth on to what is simply here – it is a constant addiction to seek experiences in everything, everyone out of virtually anything – even if it’s something as simple as going out we tend to seek to have an experience out of it, out of watching nature, sometimes even creating a mental experience of breathing ! lol that’s in essence how meditation works, quite a mental job indeed.

 

So, we’re all here learning how to actually in-fact live, this is the process – we’re all in this together at the same level and so we simply are here to walk and live and share and support ourselves within it.

This is where we’re currently at walking as a group of people that are willing themselves to live and let go/stop/terminate all the illusion of this world – that’ll in essence will eventually expand to changing the current world system as part of this realization on physical-tangible living wherein no more super imposed caps exist on life.

 

No more mental-limitations to what is HERE as Life.

 

Let’s continue breath-walking


Birth Life – Not War

Imagine yourself as a kid that turns on the TV and the channel’s CNN – you see a bunch of huge cars with people holding  large guns, breaking into homes, shouting, yelling in some language that you can’t even understand, lighting up cars, breaking windows on streets, shouting, running through streets…

You see fellow kids on the screen, they’re dead on the street, a woman next to her daughter sobbing for her daughter, she’s got blood all over… how would you react? Is this the world that we want children to be born into? You see people talking back and forth yet no one seems to see the obvious: JUST STOP KILLING EACH OTHER!!

Then further news come in, you see images of cities with rivers instead of pavement, you see people crying and looking worried while seeing their coach stream down the street, people’s homes just taken away by a gigantic flow of water – is this what we want kids to see?

Changing the channel you see images of famous people, squandering their millions on clothes and cars and shit they don’t really require to live – people barely wearing any clothes singing to songs, some others having ‘great fun’ while they go around the world – what’s wrong with this picture? How to go on as a kid seeing both images coming through the screen, both reflecting part of our bipolar reality.

Is this the world that we want to leave to the kids? to Ourselves?

 

No.

 

We’re destroying children’s ability to remain pure and have that sparkle of life that’s now being diverted to begin their quest to become massive consumers of sugar as candies and toys which then become clothes, cars and any other shit that is taught to them will make them ‘happy’. We’ve become the worst dictators as we ‘teach’/educate and indoctrinate kids to mold into the shapes and ways of this corrupt and abusive world. How have we dared to disregard LIFE when being a co-creator of this world?

 

We can only forgive ourselves for this and ensure we STOP no matter what.

We don’t require to be parents to actually realize that we have to create a world wherein kids don’t have to be staring at ‘life’ through switching channels in the remote control. Kids cannot possibly continue seeing the death and destruction that man is STILL till this day brewing for the sake of MONEY.

 

This is one of the main concerns I’ve had, a reason why I don’t plan nor want to bring a child into this world – yet, I have a newly born in my family, my sister’s baby whom I call ‘Baby Fukushima’ because she was born on march 11th this year when the earthquake in Japan took place – and my other sister is also pregnant and bringing a boy into this world at the end of this year… man, I only sigh upon this, I cannot say anything else because it’s obvious how this goes.

 

I read a hilarious note in the school’s newspaper today: ‘fertility amongst teenage women on the rise’’ – it’s obvious that it’s NOT about fertility but people not using any form of birth control, probably because of money, lack of education and worst cases: due to religious beliefs of ‘I’ll have as many kids as god wants me to have’ – some others even consider it a ‘human right’ to have children regardless of the actual conditions that someone could have to be able to support another being and provide a dignified life.

 

When I was a pre-teen, I started realizing how the world worked and I always wanted a change – I realized that to change this it’d be like uprooting the old tree and simply planting a new one – that seems impractical to do at this stage and the only point we can do is simply work with ourselves, to make sure that we at least continue ‘at least’ continue living with a new way of considering each other, with a full determination to STOP this madness that’s currently going on in this world.

 

It’s in moments like these where the world doesn’t seem to make any sense that we can only make sure we ground ourselves as breath – here – this is what I am – and I’ve only got moment to moment to continue directing myself, ensuring I don’t become part of the madness but I instead embrace and literally amalgamate myself as the only certainty that I have, breath as myself here to walk through anything that may come our way.

 

From here we can only ensure that we establish a way to support people financially so that we can then focus on education and proper support networks to support others to realize that there is another way of living in this world – for all equally. There IS a way – it only isn’t  here yet, we’ve got to create it and this is simply that which I have given to myself as ‘’the point’ to live for and by in  my existence – I do this for myself in the recognition of what and who I really am – I don’t allow myself to be daunted by the images I see – I breath and I remain as here is what I am.

 

What we’re facing is nothing else but manifested consequences of our disregard for one another and Life – we can only walk in humbleness as Life is directing now –

 

I realize I began this entry talking about kids – and I’ll end it the same way: We once were those kids that got educated by those that came before us who also didn’t know anything else but the ways that they got taught by their parents and so forth – no one’s to blame, instead we take Self Responsibility.

We are now those ‘grown ups’ that have the ability to change the reality that kids will be seeing around them, the reality that will be seen through TV and computer screens – we cannot allow ourselves to continue with this old world – we’ve got to become the stand to make a final STOP from history repeating and not only create a ‘new picture’ for all of us to see, but a complete new way of existing, now living-life for real instead of living in a complete simulated reality where all pictures have taken the place of importance while disregarding and being completely alienated from realizing who we are as Life.

 

This is the only point we can take on as our vow to Life: to create a world that’s actually best for all –  it’s the least we can do as humanity after all we’ve accepted and allowed ourselves to become. When you take into consideration the whole as yourself, you stop worrying about our petty little problems in our mind, we start realizing the actual situations to be faced in reality as part of the challenges that we’ve so meticulously and inanely created for ourselves to face today – this is the process and it’s unfolding as we write and read here.

 

How I see it is only through taking self responsibility we can vindicate our stance towards that which we’ve disregarded all along as ourselves: Life.

 

Let’s support life to be birthed from the physical – not further disregard and enslavement as a clone of our past, waging wars for the sake of Money.

If you have kids I suggest to be the living example of a world that is an can be best for all, to stand strong within the realization that who we really are cannot be deadened by others. We stand, walk and breath – and so it is and will be.


¿Una Vida Más? ( One more life?) – 2008


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