Tag Archives: success

395. What is Real Empowerment?

 

The Fallacious Archetype of Power

Perdition City

 

The wordpower’ in Spanish is ‘poder’ which means simply ‘can’ / ‘being able to’ and as such it is interesting how we have elevated the word ‘power’ to something beyond ourselves, something that we almost see sitting up high on a throne far away from our reach, we see it as some blinding almighty light that only gods and masters can obtain, and politicians, CEO’s, and elites of this world can control with money. This is how I would see the word ‘power’ before, filled with something ‘extraordinary’ that apparently none of us regular ‘mortals’ have – this is the cognitive dissonance, the fallacy existent within the word at a collective level which is precisely the construct of hierarchy that exists within each one of us.

 

By ‘the construct of hierarchy’ I mean the ability to layer ourselves as human beings in various strata of the super rich and the ‘empowered’ at the top, and then going all the way down to the lower strata: lower middle class to people living in abject poverty.

The sheer acceptance of poverty and the ‘megarich as something ‘normal’ or part of ‘how the world works’ already reveals something: we have created an idea of what ‘power’ implies as the amount of money one can have, which creates the abusive logic of: IF you are not a super rich elite person THEN you are ‘disempowered’ as the ‘power’ is held in the hands of those few ones at the top and only ‘they’ can rule and control and tell us what to do and how to do things…. This is the general belief wherein we become subject to ‘others’ and in this the first point of abuse is precisely not being able to recognize ourselves as equals.

 

 

Guns_and_Angels

 

Now, this is just to place into context the first fallacy: Power means to have LOTS of money, being in a ‘higher position’ where you can control others and abuse something/someone to continue aggrandizing your personal power. So, this is certainly not the definition of power, but the definition of Abuse masked as ‘power’ and ‘success’ and some kind of ‘divine power’ that is ingrained in our minds from thousands of years ago, mind control it is. 

 

This idea of ‘power’ in the form of abuse must be realized for the consequences it has created the moment that we All have given more importance to money itself – which turns into possessions, enslaving others to do the work for you, to be able to control people for personal gain, to deceive, to lie and cheat, to bribe –  in order to advance personal plans for power. So, we’ve also then lived the ‘wrong meaning’ of what success means and as such you can start figuring out how many of the words we had all at some point desired to achieve, were in fact meanings of words that are not entirely supportive for everyone, but instead only glorify our personal interest without considering what is best for everyone else at the same time.

 

What I’ve realized that has happened within ourselves is that because taking control/direction of one’s life involves doing the actual work, the investigation, the discipline to lay out plans and test out ways to genuinely empower oneself and make things work within a supportive context, we all have (un)consciously decided to take the ‘easy route’ wherein a handful of individuals that were noticeably cunning in ways to get the most for themselves by using tricks, deception and lies that ‘sell well’ have been able to make their fortunes based on OUR complacency, our ignorance, our irresponsibility, gullibility and law of the least effort which is precisely the point of disempowerment we have grown into ourselves like the actual cancer that takes us into the mentality of ‘oh well we are never going to be powerful enough like ‘the elite’ to change things, so let’s just keep having a good time’ And in this, we are only accepting the manufactured consent to remain in our own little cages, living in con-fine-ments of houses/rooms where we simply believe that ‘it’s the life I had to live’ / ‘God wanted me to learn these lessons’ / ‘this is how life is/ I simply have to make things work and let things flow’ when in fact all of these are nothing else but excuses and justifications to not stand up for ourselves.

What we haven’t realized is that ‘The Power’ / Our Power in itself is always HERE in and as each one of us in our ability to decide to precisely no longer ‘follow the leader’ but rather questioning the leader, questioning the governments, questioning the entire hierarchical structure we live in, questioning the benefits we have endowed to some within a belief structure called politics, religion, class systems, races, we have to ponder our abilities and restrictions and so within doing that coming to the realization that we’ve bought a great lie wherein we believed all along that ‘we are disempowered’ and so within this,actually disenfranchising ourselves from our living rights –  but we aren’t really, we have just been – let me be frank – too lazy, too apathetic, too idle to take responsibility for making things work and be beneficial not only for ourselves but for everyone else too.

 

Disempowerment toward Politics/Politicians

We accepted and allowed it

A point in my life I’ve felt disempowerment is when witnessing abuse and this is how this word then came up. Within this what I have created is the belief that the point of abuse is ‘so out there, out of my reach’ that ‘I can’t do anything about it’ but this is also an excuse and justification, a fallacy in fact because in this we believe that that which I am witnessing as a point of abuse is ‘outside of myself’ and if we are human beings, we all have a mind, a body and so we can all rather begin realizing that IF another human being was able to commit such abuse THEN I as another human being can investigate, understand such abuse, trace the origin point, source it, understand it and rather learn how it was originated so that I can focus on preventing the situations and accumulation of behaviors, circumstances internally and externally that propitiate a situation of abuse.

A classic point of disempowerment I lived throughout my life was when witnessing and/or getting information about the corruption in politics – hence my ‘loathing politics’ experience – and so believing that those people ‘in power’ were simply doing what they willed themselves to because ‘they could’ because they were in the position to do so, and so this ‘position’ point became the limitation: their money, their knowledge, their relationships, their names, their families, etc. So in this all that I learned to create is anger, aversion and a general desire to ‘have nothing to do with politics’ or with money, or with getting a good position in the system, because ‘I hated it’ but in fact this is what makes us All disempowered, when we already see ourselves wanting to deny that which we see or believe to be ‘too high’ / ‘too far away from my reach to change’.

Furthermore I realized how I created such aversion/hatred toward politics because I realized that instead of political platforms existing to regulate our lives and support everyone as equals, the opposite is what drives politics at the moment. And so, this experience of ‘hatred’ as my emotional reaction for not getting the expected support from politicians and politics in general to support our societies, so that is why it is My responsibility to stop my own experience of hatred that leads to the belief of me being disempowered in my ability to change things, to change the world-system and my reality – little did I know or was aware of how it is that in this moment I actually swallowed the belief that ‘I can’t do anything if I am not in that position of power’ which is the first way in which we go ‘tagging’ ourselves, defining each other as either powerful or disempowered individuals in society, all by the amount of money, of influence, of powerful family relationships,  of studies, of properties etc. all of it consolidating the same fallacious definition of power as an actual abuse upon the rest that do not have equal access to what the ‘empowered’ has.

So,  what I’ve done since then after many years of contempt and aversion and antagonizing and even mocking politicians, I came to focus on my responsibility to change myself first, which means going from this belief of disempowerment to an actual self-empowerment which is nothing else but taking responsibility for myself, for the education that I half-way received about how the world actually functions and getting to see a fuller picture, to understand who really ‘runs the world’ – or what really runs the world as the money-construct – and how the actual way to implement change is through politics. From there I walked an entire process of clearing up the word politics for myself so that I no longer bring up this mental image of men in suits sitting on a chamber of congress making decisions behind closed doors while eating caviar and sipping champagne, abusing women and children and joking about the poor that have fun with bread and circus. So, this means that I started rather investigating what are the actual forces that drive our reality, who are our government, how have ‘they’ been also created as part of an enclosed system of rich and poor,  what is it that we have missed in our reality that we have abdicated our entire organization to a handful that only look after their own benefit, all of this means: where is My responsibility to the world system in fact.

And so upon discovering and understanding some of the greatest lies in our entire history like how money is created and the purpose of our education, what our foods contain, the type of devaluation of dignity that entertainment represents, the warfare industry, the general commodification of life then became a solid starting point for me to realize that I am not really ‘disempowered’ because I can investigate and certainly I can then through understanding the problem also propose solutions, which didn’t come as easy either, because I had to then walk through my very own definitions of ‘value’ and money as as the current representation of the relationship of abuse toward one another, and the rest of the constructs that we have all collectively agreed upon as a ‘default’ point from birth.

So, no one said it is going to be ‘easy’ to actually conduct the changes required due to the time, the effort, the money that is required for it and the group of people that will only make it happen through unity as the real form of empowerment one by one – though the first point is recognizing that ‘I can’ and this is no hopeful-positive thinking political slogan situation just like ‘yes we can’ that have been used to get presidential candidates into office. No. this is about genuinely becoming aware of how we can investigate, understand the problem and so walk it through to a solution beginning with ourselves, which means stopping the patterns of apathy, aversion, hatred, judgment and more so Blame toward ‘those that I believe are in power’

 

So what is real power then?

Power is the ability to recognize that ‘I can’, that ‘I am able,’  that I can direct myself and become an individual that no longer is mentally driven by seeking the kind of abuse (false archetype of power we just discussed) as a form of personal gain called ‘success,’ but instead that I can change myself to become an individual that can demonstrate that the ‘order’ in this world is flawed and that it must be changed – but how can ‘it’ all be changed if we keep living in a bubble called the personal belief of being ‘disempowered’?

In this case, proposing self-education to understand our individual responsibility to our lives and how within doing that we will come to realize that the current system is unsustainable and so, we can also join in with our new awareness to  propose solutions that can change the way we currently live in. So here we are then crossing the line from the ‘disempowered’ member of society that sees ‘no way out’ to the individual that sees that the way out is precisely through recognizing that I Can/ I am Able to understand the problem and so within understanding also conduct changes within ourselves first – and this is very, very important because most of the ‘activism’ that takes place is entirely conducted or ‘aiming’ at ‘changing others’ which is entirely futile really. Isn’t it such a common phrase to say: “be the change that you want to see in the world”? Well, this means apply, live the principles to be and become such change, instead of understanding such phrase as in ‘being the one that demands change’ or some other way to deviate from the point of responsibility.

We can and are able to recognize our power, our ability to change things, which is not really something ‘outside of ourselves’ but recognizing our ability to act according to what we see is and would be best for everyone, which also is what we can also define as taking self-responsibility leading to actual self-empowerment. This is a process where we go recognizing that as we take matters into our own hands, we then go dropping all the fallacies, the deception, the belief systems that we had held ourselves imprisoned by. And it is more than necessary today to begin letting go of this idea and Experience of ‘feeling disempowered’ and instead, rather flag-it and see it as the excuse this word ‘disempowerment’ is and represents to not take responsibility, to not recognize that I CAN Stop and Prevent such point of Abuse within myself by recognizing my equal-capability of understanding the problem/ the point of abuse and directing it toward a solution.

 

If we don’t do this, then who will?

 

We have gotten ourselves to this point because we just were too complacent – too lazy – to actually take our lives into our own hands, but instead we delegated our power, our ‘I can’ for myself in the hands of a few that obviously have abused it tremendously as it had to be, otherwise if they had been benevolent beings that ‘took care of it all,’ then maybe we would have never really even considered how it is ourselves that should take responsibility for ourselves first and foremost and so one by one waking up to this realization, we will live in an actual self-governance, a self-direction, I direct me as my mind and my body to do/conduct and direct myself to prevent/stop this point of abuse and so correct the ways, behaviors, patterns toward a best for all outcome.

This is a process of self creation and self-empowerment is then the ability to recognize that I can, I am able to, and more so recognizing this not as a fleeting moment of positivity, but an actual continued, constant and diligent process of redefining our words such as ‘power’ and live the ‘I can’ and ‘I am able to’ direct myself in reality, seeing where we still believe ‘we can’t’ and so pushing ourselves to really test it out – can’t we really? do we fear something? Is there a reality point, a potential consequence that I could create if I do this? Of course within the current boundaries of what this physical reality implies when it comes to laws of physics and the rest of the system we have to stick to at the moment – all done in a supportive, peaceful, non-aggressive manner – always considering what is best for all which implies: no harm, no abuse.

 

Change isn’t a magical overnight thing, it is a rather long continued process of self-movement to stop and prevent the same patterns of abuse that are manifested consequences of thousands of years! So it is about first becoming such living principle of what it means to live words that are self-supportive and so see how as we share and live with each other, we can go creating agreements that we can physically in real time test out work  to live in a way that is beneficial for all – and so by doing this and living this realization in ‘real time’ then, we actually go empowering ourselves and each other to realize: we actually have the power to change, and that Is empowering.

 

So, it’s time to empower ourselves and each other recognizing that We Can and so lay out the plan on how one is going to live such ability/power every single day to change oneself and live in self-responsibility which then becomes a form of freedom too from the accepted and allowed mind-control belief of ‘we are too little to change’ –Time to grow up!

 

Please read:

Day 409: How to Change this Bloody, Bloody World

Suggested interview:

From Self Victimization to Self Empowerment – 2013 – The Future of Consciousness – Part 38

Self-Empowerment and Expansion with Desteni:

 

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The Starting Point

By Ken Cousens

 

“True Love cannot exist in the presence of Unequal Station”
In this essay we will explore the fundamental context that one must address in order to understand the concepts of Equal Money and Equal Life. This context is summed up in the title of the essay: The Starting Point. Simply stated, it is one’s starting point that will wholly determine whether one can comprehend the concepts of Equal Money and Equal Life, and in that context there are only two starting points that exist, either one starts from the point of self-interest (“What’s in it for ME?”) or one starts from the point of what is best for all (“What’s in it for WE?”). There is no middle ground. If one is starting from the point of self-interest, one cannot get there from here. Every argument and every position rallied against the principles of Equal Money and Equal Life become self-nullifying when the starting point is self-interest. When life is viewed from the subjective position of unequal station, where there is greater and lesser, superior and inferior, more deserving and less deserving, and every variation thereof, then nothing exists except for the self-focused reality of self-interest. Not only is it a fact that true love cannot exist in the presence of unequal station, but nothing exists in the presence of unequal station except the self-absorbed reality of personal agendas, the self-focused litany of arguments ad nauseam that insist it is more important than all of existence, and that rights of birth, station, position, status quo and everything else are there to support the illusions of separation and all of its variants. In simple terms there is only the choice between Life and self, and what those saluting the flag of self have failed to take into account at this stage of planetary evolution is that life has had enough of the abuses of self, and is now taking control, whether that is apparent to the self or not at this moment in time. In time, and the not too distant future, it will become the most self-evident principle on the planet.

 

When the starting point of one’s approach to Equal Money and Equal Life is “What Is Best For All” then the entire universe rearranges itself to make the principles self-evident, as if they always existed as an integrated whole system, a complete interconnected fabric of life and existence that has never been without harmony, balance and equilibrium while still at the same time fully observant with eyes wide open to the horrors of separation and all of its spawn. Such a starting point is not about the lofty abstraction of positivity in ignorance of the realities on this planet, it is simply the firmly established stand that there is only one choice for how money and the systems thereof must ultimately be applied, and that is to do what is best for all. In such context, Life is seen as a fluid continuity that is in communion with all of existence, and every part contains the template of the whole and the whole is seen in every part. In this, the starting point is to stand as Life; to take the stand within and as oneself as Life means that one cannot do anything that is not fundamentally based on the sound principle of what is best for all life in all expressions and all manifestations. Life as what is best for all is based on correspondence, which is simply the ability to respond as the equal and parallel coefficient of every other expression of life, to respond as co-equal to all other forms of life, to nurture every iota of life as one would one’s own breath, and the in breath and out breath of one’s own respiration, as re-spiriting, is the inspiration and out spiration of life as spirit as one and equal to every and all living expressions.

 

When one takes a stand for Life, it is a self-directive state of being that establishes an implacable position that will not be swayed and cannot be persuaded from that position no matter what may come at it. All time and space cannot persuade one so situated to rescind the commitment, and such a stand for Life will inevitably force all of existence to rearrange itself to conform to the intent of such a stand for the principle of what is best for all. To the self-focused and self-interested such a stand is madness and has no logic, because the starting point of such is that if it does not serve self in its self-fulfilling gratification, then it has no meaning and has no value. The self-interested cannot even fathom such a stand for Life because there is no instant gratification and there is therefore no value to such a one.
The self-interested character that resides, in one variation or another, in almost the entire planetary population knows only one principle, so succinctly expressed in the statement “What’s in it for me?” It is like a universal radio station tuned to WIIFM, and the pain, suffering, agony, pleading, misery, torment and convulsions of the world and its population are like distant static that are so effectively tuned out by that finely honed instrument of self-adulation and ego-maniacal madness known as the self, singing blithely “I, Me, Mine…I, Me, Mine…I, Me, Mine….” as the world descends into entropic annihilation. “Are you mad?” proclaims the self-interested adherent when presented with the concept of “The Greater Good” because such a one cannot even begin to understand that there is anything outside of itself worthy of its attention. Their starting point as well as every other point along the timeline of their existence is always and forever centered on self, so such concepts as a global economic and monetary system based on the sanctity of Life, the honoring of all beings and the exaltation of the life force in every plant, animal, human, forest, ocean, river, field and ecosystem cannot be fathomed and never given credence. Conversely, a system in which every action is within dynamic equilibrium with all beings and all existence so that Life itself is forever regenerative, equally manifesting what is best for all beings, reciprocally and mutually beneficial to every form and function, and eternally sustainable, is as natural as the first breath of a new born baby to one that stands for the principles of Equal Money and Equal Life for All.

 

The self-interested starting point can only hear the word “Money” in the phrase “Equal Money” and cannot comprehend that such a word as “equal” has anything to do with money. Money to the self-interested is the beginning, middle and end of all existence. It is not a means to an end, it is the end itself. The self-interested worship at the altar of money and never give it a second thought, never understanding that every dollar that passes through their pockets and accounts is attached to someone, some where, that must service a debt, toil in the fields, labor in the factories and deliver the goods that their self-indulgent lives may be supported and sustained on the blood, sweat and tears of millions whose bones pave the way to an imaginary heaven so that the privileged few might easily enter such a promised land. The self-interested do not even know that the word money itself is derived from the name of an ancient moon goddess (“Mon”) that has woven her lunar spell over countless generations so that their very minds are wrapped and enraptured as nothing less than the lunatic fringe of a world gone mad, driving the teaming masses to commit the unspeakable and heinous acts and assaults on Life now taken for granted as if the end point of this madness is the way it is, the way it has always been and the way it will forever be. Such phrasing as “It’s to Die For” and “I will kill to have that new car” are taken as a given, as natural, as the rallying call of the self-interested, thereby establishing their starting point as death, violence and destruction just to fulfill that one last desire before the closing of the last curtain over the stage of all life, to die for one last pleasure, to kill for that one last prize.

 

Therefore, one must start with the logical question: “What is my starting point?” How does one approach the question of Equal Money as a direct expression and manifestation of an Equal Life for all? Does one, in fact, start from the point of recognizing that every thing in existence is standing as Life itself, for everything has a life force, and that life force is equal in all things. But, you say, rocks do not have life force. To which the proper response is, oh but yes they do. They stand equal as the manifestation of Life in every atom of their substance, that stands equal with magnetism and electrical current that flows throughout their molecular bodies, and from the rocks comes the soil and in the soil exist the teaming masses of microorganisms that are essential for every plant, animal and human to stand in their life as the physical embodiment that they are. When Life is seen from the starting point of an inextricable web of creation that is wholly interdependent on every other living thing, just as the systems of man have created a global system that everyone is completely dependent upon as a quantum whole, then the starting point begins to become clear as that which holds and sustains Life in all things, in all creatures and in all of manifest existence. And every other thing, every seeming inanimate expression of Life, when looked upon in and as part of this inextricable fabric of Life as a quantum whole, can and will be seen, if the starting point is Life as one and equal, as part of the whole, both dependent and interdependent for its life, life force and existence, as standing in oneness and equality with all Life.

 

So what does it mean “to stand” for Life and “to stand” for oneness and equality? It means simply that one chooses as a self-directive principle to make Life and what is best for all as the central point from which all one’s life, actions, thoughts, feelings, emotions and intentions emerge. It means one stands for Life and cannot be moved from that position, as a commitment of one’s being beyond time and space, as a holding point and station that will not ever again accept or allow that which is not best for all or in support of Life. From such a starting point, everything that is not in support of Life, that is not properly founded on life-enhancing principles, shall, as by a force of nature, depart from one’s existence. If one takes that stand resolute and without equivocation, then all of Life and all of nature shall rearrange around oneself in correspondence with that stand; and when two or more stand for and as Life, together as one, Life is here in that co-equal commitment and co-resonant expression and the power and force of that commitment is expanded exponentially. In that stand and starting point, the mind cannot enter, because the mind by design will seek every angle, every perspective and every strategy to find fault in that stand and position. The mind as the starting point is designed to support separation and self-interest, and therefore, if the starting point of approach to the concept of Equal Money is one of the mind expressed as logic, economic models, mathematical equations or any other spawn of the mind, one can never see past the veils of illusion and deceit upon which such a starting point is premised.

 

To the mind of self-interest, the starting point of a forest is nothing more than a calculation of board feet, bonds and capital, corporate equity and the rest of it; to one who stands as Life in equality, the forest is a living community with infinite variety, infinite grandeur and infinite expressions, seen as the whole forest consisting of and equal to every part and every being living in that expression of Life standing equal to the whole. As such, if a human enters that forest and standing as Equal Money and Equal Life utilizes the mind as a tool, the calculations of that self-directive being with and through their mind will analyze the use of the forest in a sustainable model. In such an approach, every living creature in the forest is taken into consideration, so that if harvesting timber is part of the intention, then it will be done with the life of the forest itself taken into consideration so that the forest is left both intact and sustainably continuing in its life force and every component part’s requirements sustained and maintained. This approach can be applied to any other system, whether it is a farm, a river, an ocean or a planet. Human needs can be met in such a model, and Life itself will direct the principle and the calculations and the considerations to sustain the whole, including humanity, within the context of preserving the part of every whole in its integrity and its right to Life. Standing as equality includes consideration for the future, so that the future needs of the system, at whatever scale, are part of the calculations, so that the sustainable model can exist here and now, and can continue in every moment here and now into eternity. Standing as Life is standing in and as eternity. Standing as Life is standing in and as Equal Station with all of Life, in its infinite variety of expression and manifestation, and in its eternal continuity throughout all of existence.

 

Standing as Equal Money means that one has taken the irrevocable stand as a commitment of one’s being to live in every breath as the principle that money is only a tool whose utility must always be applied to what is best for all and shall provide the means and methods whereby all of Life will be honored as equal in life force in the part and in the whole. Standing as Equal Money establishes a starting point that money is seen as a system that previous to such stand was created and applied within a context of competition, jealousy, fear, violence, destruction, proceeding as a veritable biblical plague that will devour everything in its path to perpetuate its existence as the god of humanity and a force that cannot be contained. Money in and as a principle of unequal station creates hierarchy, posits reality on seemingly immutable laws of lack and limitation, in which some will have and some (read most) will have not. The inevitable equation of money premised on unequal station is that some have the so-called divine right to hoard and accumulate wealth to be applied only for the glorification of self to the detriment of all of Life as a whole. This, of course, equates to the love of money, where in such an equation this so-called love is nothing more than the penultimate expression of self-aggrandizement, self-interest and self-adulation, all of which is, in fact, nothing more than the inversely proportionate expression of self-loathing, self-degeneracy and self-abnegation.

 

What those in such a station at this point in time do not see, realize or understand, is that money as a force has now taken control of all of the systems previously created to support and sustain it, and that force is one of pure unadulterated self-interest equal to the negation of Life, which can only be defined as a reverse reflection of LIVE, thus as EVIL, and that it is now commenced on the process of consumption of all in its path, including those previous masters of money who perceived and believed themselves destined to own and control all of Life and all of this world. All who insist that money in support of self-interest is an eternal and never ending ride shall one day soon wake up to the sober realization that they are one and equal to that which they support and have become. Therefore, those in support of money in any manifestation of inequality, where the few have much and the many have none, shall be increasingly faced with nothing left but themselves and as themselves they will be sorely pressed to face all the consequences that ensued from such a starting point. To those it can only be said to consider the possibility that at some point in time, somewhere, some when, somehow, Life finally has had enough. Now Life, as the most powerful force in all of existence, has begun the slow and steadily increasing reversal of the game whereby only Life as an Equal Station, as an Equal Starting Point, will inexorably have the final say in the matter. And the beginning point of such a say is in fact matter itself, as matter derived from mater, the material matrix from whence life emerges, the mother of all here in the physical, not in some ephemeral dream posited as heaven in some non-existent future, but right here, right now, whether as Life in the microcosm where the microbial expression shall overtake mankind’s ignorance of Life itself in its use of drugs, antibiotics, chemicals, poisons and genetically modified organisms, or in the macrocosmic scale of weather and planetary ecosystems that shall, if necessary, remove the offending apostates who think they can play god and own and control Life itself. All the money in their self-contained delusions of grandeur will never buy Life and will never again buy anyone a first class ticket to heaven. Get real, get with Life, or pay the consequences when you must, inevitably, face yourself and only yourself in the end. And do not delude yourself any longer, for you do so now at your own peril. The beginning of the end has already begun.
Life is now in control.

 

Life can and will rearrange the system of money to serve Life, and those clinging to money as their god and their central starting point of self-interest, will find that they are beginning to lose their grip. Indeed, they are already finding this to be the fact. All of Heaven now stands as equal to Life; before the maxim as above, so below was literally true, and therefore, the hierarchical, unequal structure of Earth in its monetary system of life-negation was indeed how Heaven was arrayed. But a doorway was finally opened between Earth and Heaven, and the infinite separation that had allowed the previous system to be created, to grow and thrive, was suddenly dissolved forever. Those in the hierarchy of Heaven, in which control and enslavement equal to that seen here on the Earth, had suddenly become aware of the situation, and they took the stand – finally – to serve Life. Now, those who previously had been assured their destiny as masters of the universe here on Earth, no longer have the support of a stratified dimensional Heaven that supported their stations as the seeming masters of Life. Suddenly, and irrevocably, all in Heaven came together as one, equal with and as Life, walking a process to face themselves, to forgive themselves and to commit themselves to what was best for all, best for Life.

 

The stand for Life, with the starting point of asking the question with every action: “Is this Best for ALL?,” requires that one must always start with and stand on the principle of self-honesty. When one fills a car with gasoline and uses that gasoline to convey oneself to a place for self-indulgent purposes, does one honestly stand with the principle that the price paid for a gallon of gas does not come close to paying the full price in all of its consequences for all such self-indulgent acts? When one drives a car to work to make money in an industry that negates Life, that destroys Life, that contributes to the annihilation of species, of ecosystems, or the planet as a whole, can one truly face oneself in self-honesty and avoid the fact that in consequence there shall be a significant price to pay for that gallon of gas, that day’s events, or that job, or that transaction, that corporation or that nation? Can we as a whole, as humanity, stand in true self-honesty and view the condition of this world and the condition of a large portion of humanity and say the current system of money and politics and religion, the triumvirate gods of most who refer to themselves as human, and say that this system is what works for all and is best for all?

 

Can you who are reading this essay stand and look at yourself in the mirror and see in yourself a mother clutching her starving child to her withered breast bereft of nourishment and blithely just discard that living child to the trash heap of history and grind her bones to build more castles and citadels designed to protect and defend the sanctimonious temples of this world; can you continue believing that in ten thousand years of more of the same, such bones of countless starving children shall turn to limestone and become the marbled pillars of the moneyed institutions in some future world in which such money stands as god of existence and all bow down to it and pray for relief to be disbursed like rolls of copper pennies. Can you in unabashed self-honesty look yourself in the eye and see yourself standing one and equal in the body of a wretched soul who must grovel in the trash heaps of this world to scratch out a meager subsistence of life, to stand equal to the children having to sleep loveless and cold in the discarded corners of every city, to stand equal to the battered women as they endure the relentless onslaught of violent and impotent men made so by a soulless society that cares naught for their existence save for how their life force can be forcibly extracted to energize the neon lights of this phantasmal illusion that knows nothing of real Life? Do you ever ask yourself what was that bump in the road that momentarily disturbed your air conditioned limousine ride through the perfumed corridors of your mind, and listen for the answer that says it was the discarded bodies of a billion hungry men, women and children that you have built your empires upon or perhaps the countless piles of bones littered throughout your history of neglect, contempt, and disdain for such lesser beings not worthy to eat the few crumbs that fall from your sumptuous banquet table? Do you really think the incantation of the priest will absolve you of personal responsibility as you pass from your deathbed into the beyond, or perhaps do you ever consider the possibility that now that Heaven walks equal as one with Life, you will only be met with the reflection of your own starting point and you must walk every moment of it with full awareness of every deed you have done and every consequence you have spawned?

 

It has been said as if eternally true that there are only two things that are certain in life: death and taxes, yet now, there is really only one thing that is certain, and that is that in death one will inexorably have to face oneself. At that moment there will be only one question: “What was your starting point when given for consideration the concept of Equal Money as a new system to replace the old, one in which all things are constructed to serve every aspect of Life, every being and every thing?” Was it “What is best for all,” or was it “What’s in it for me?” Was it “How Can I Serve Life?” or was it “Who Will Serve Me?”

 

Equal Money has nothing to do with money, for money does not exist. Money is simply the totality and reflection of humanity in its current relationship to life, which is a system on automatic drive that is self-perpetuating, parasitic in its total expression, and harvesting the substance of the life force of all of humanity without regard to the consequences. Today money serves the ego and the illusion of false prosperity and the abject denial that things are seriously wrong in this world. Today money is god, for both the godly and the godless alike; all worship at its altar and pray to its deified visage in their minds. It is not a pathway to Life as best for all, but only for what serves them and them alone. When the starting point of anyone upon hearing the phrase Equal Money is that which is best only for themselves, they only hear their own denial and the collective din of humanity in its mass consensus hallucination that all is right in the universe. All is not right in the universe, yet all can be made right. We need only commit to and stand for the concept of Equal Life for all, commit to and stand for the principle of prosperity and abundance for everyone, commit to and stand for the starting point that all children go to sleep at night in a warm bed, with furry toys tucked in beside them, with warm bellies filled with nourishment, with all men and women standing together in joie de vive, a joy for life born from the soil and substance of their lives in harmony with all other Life, standing firm and implacable in the realization and understanding that by standing for Life they stand with and as all of existence.

 

So in the end there is only one choice, death and annihilation, or Life and eternal vitality for all. True love can only exist within the balance and harmony of equal station for all, which means simply that all can stand in their own lives equally, that all fundamental rights of existence that one would want for oneself and one’s family are equally available to all. In such a paradigm, money automatically becomes an equal equation that is utilized for fulfilling the requirements of Life as best for all. It can happen in an instant breath for anyone, it simply requires a paradigm shift in a quantum moment, to take the stand for Life, to realize that Life in correspondence with Life is what true love consists of and exists as, and to realize that all substance here in the physical is the very fabric of Life itself. To deny any other being the full compliment of joyful existence in the full vitality of Life is to deny oneself the very same, for we are each as to and unto each other the mirror reflection of ourselves, and in fact, we are each other as we are Life as a whole. We only have to wake up from our self-induced nightmare and take a stand against the perpetuation of the illusions of separation within and as the abstractions of the mind, which have driven us to the very precipice of madness and precariously close to the imminent tipping point towards irreversible planetary ecocide. But the hour is getting late; it is very late, indeed.

 

ALL Equality is WITHIN the ESSENCE of LIFE itself,
From which All Form Emerges;
When this is not recognized and understood,
A separation occurs where No Joy is Ever Possible.[1]

 

There are many here among us, who feel that Life is but a joke;
But you and I, we’ve been through that, and that is not our fate;
So let us not talk falsely now, the hour is getting late![2]

 

 

[1] Bernard Poolman, Creation’s Journey to Life, Day 174
http://creationsjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/10/day-174-after-death-communication-part.html
[2] Bob Dylan, All Along the Watchtower

 


213. Opinionated Elitism: Intellectual Prickism

Revolutionary –Elitist Character – because all worry and concern about the system was not self-honest, but rather aiming at personal glory.

Continuation of the Elite Character

The Revolutionary Character:

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I required a reason to stand up for life in equality as in having a particular ‘bad life’ or suffering in order to advocate a world system that will ensure all living beings are supported for life and in this, believe that any form of suffering was necessary for us to stand up, without realizing that such suffering, struggle and abuse has been he direct outflow of our own accepted and allowed existence in selfishness, self interest and utmost greed that leads to the negligence of other beings as ourselves, which leads to accepting and allowing a reality of abuse and neglect, simply because we were not apparently directly affected by it, when the reality is that we all are aware at some level of everything that goes on in this world, and that no matter how hard we try to ‘make our lives work’ and ‘try to make it’ in this world, we will never get to an actual state of well being unless we change the system that is currently fostering the conditions of abuse as a means to survive.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to comply and form my judgment about reality based on ‘critical opposition’ to a system that I thought had to ‘work for us’ no matter what, without ever questioning why it is that the only civil-obedience act that I would know of was paying for taxes and voting for political representation, never actually realizing that this world is the way it is because we have all collectively agreed to the non-sensical rules and regulations as ‘laws’ that are only benefitting a minority of the population that lives in opulence, while the majority  is neglected and side viewed by any form of human-rights and laws that could guarantee the general well being of mankind as equals, though because this would imply having no ability to abuse and exert power over someone that isn’t forced to ‘make a living’ to get by and survive, we simply agreed that living in optimum conditions would mean having to work/ having to have a constant struggle to ‘make it’ in this world, accepting this as the general imprint we grow up as children, always aiming at ‘getting better/ progressing/ developing’ but always witnessing things only going wrong, bad, corrupted, failing and within this

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to start conforming to an apathy and general mocking of our politics and governmental systems due to believing that they were the only bad guys creating the problems I was witnessing in my environment as the country and the world, and that we, the people, had to ‘fight for our rights and be heard,’ generating an entire energetic personality of constant opposition, criticism, wanting to hoard as much knowledge and information about the world as possible so that I could ‘defend’ myself when being asked about my opinions about politics, economics and social matters. I realize that in this all I was not In fact looking at the actual reality of people, but mostly being entertained by numbers, graphics, pictures that I would see in the media in order to create a particular Experience about ‘how bad, how wrong and twisted the world is’ without ever even questioning my own participation within it as an equal-part that is responsible for Everything that goes on in this world, no matter what I do or what I don’t do, the sheer fact that we are living beings is already indicating that we have all tacitly agreed with the current ways the system works – and within that, any form of change cannot come only from a new system in place, but must be In place through our individual change and self correction within the understanding of what it is that Life must be as What is Best for All.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to for a while not question my reality further because of seeing that ‘out of my reach’ and seeing the understanding of how money works, how money is created and what the devaluation of our currency meant – beyond just ‘erasing’ three zeros’ – and simply brush it aside as if it was something that had ‘nothing to do with me’ at the moment. Not realizing that everything that was making my life work was not out of ‘nowhere’ but money that is what enabled me to continue living and being educated and existing only seeking for my own benefit, because it is quite clear how if I had any form of physical struggle to get money as in not having enough money, I would have questioned my  reality further  – yet I used the reality, the knowledge and information for my own benefit as a way to make myself ‘knowledgeable’ and what I’ve been tagging as ‘system savvy’ in order to perpetuate the intellectualism of the problems in the world to have interesting ‘talks’ with other people that would seem ‘equally interesting’ to me to do so, and within this never really actually SEEING the problems we were speaking about as the actual reality of people, but were only using it as a way to show off knowledge and information, have long talks over coffee and ‘plot’ some amusing plans to ‘overcome the system’ that would go no further than just that, talking and having no inkling of an actual plan, way and method to in fact create a change in this world – thus, my concern about the system must be seen not as an actual act of caring, but was also imprinted with my desire to start making a name for myself in order to get to be part of the Intellectual-Elite that could talk about the problems in the world and earn great money out of it. (Read: 207. Changing the World in Self Interest)

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to be ‘informed’ from an early age about what was happening in the world, but this was all based within self interest as in having the ability to Know more about the world, to be quite the ‘exceptional child’ that would not be amused by ‘childish games’ but would act as an adult in order to seem special and within this,once again, building up a point of specialness, superiority and recognition over time in order to get to be ‘the most’ everyone told me I could be, which became then an over-confidence as an Experience based on me being ‘opinionated’ and having ‘critical views’ on the world early on, which made me feel good when people would be amazed of my wits and knowledge and information, never really in myself even considering how what I was speaking about, was being actually lived and experienced in Reality by human beings that are also part of myself as everyone and everything that is here – which is how we have intellectualized reality instead of actually Understanding it in order to create a feasible way to change our living-ways and within this, promote an actual system-change.

 

I realize that my interest for the world matters was also in self interest for all of the above mentioned points: superiority, specialness, being ‘witty’ and system savvy wherein no real actual consideration of the lives of the people that I was generalizing with data and names and history was actually about. This is how once again, we are only able to intellectualize reality because of the protection and security that money is granting us, a select sector of the population that has been ‘gifted’ with the ability to have a dignified living, neglecting the majority that is out of our sight and only reduced to ‘world news’ of poverty, starvation, abuse, trafficking, animal extinction and wars that we see only as ‘interesting topics’ that will make us look like a person that Cares, but little did I even care to actually be and become a human being that understands the reasons and actual detail of why the lives of human beings have been neglected to such an extent that we’ve reduced Actual Lives to graphics, to GDP numbers and figures that in no way serve Life, in no way actually consider the living conditions of such people that are just forming parts of percentages, numbers and statistics that indicate an apparent growth or devaluation of life on Earth.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to never question how it was possible to have a ‘Devaluation’ of our currency which would be the same as ‘devaluing’ life in one way or another – within this, missing out all possible common sense that I could have considered if I had allowed myself to investigate further on  how money exists, and how money is created, and the actual laws and regulations that dictate our reality, but instead, only used such knowledge and information for my own personal benefit as a opinionated character, having some form of ‘criteria’ to speak about the world simply because of judging this as proper to educated and wealthy people. There you go, intellectualism exposed.

 

I Forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to hide the fact that my interest on world matters was actually only based on attaining/ hoarding knowledge and information as a synonym of money, wherein I would be planning already how ‘great’ I was going to be when having had a life of being informed on social matters, politics, trying to understand wall street and becoming a news junky just so that I could give lectures/ talks about my education, my ‘awareness’ of the problems of the world while gaining a name for myself as this type of ‘good being’ that would fight for social justice and a revolution,  without being self honest with myself to see how the starting point of this all was in self interest and not really caring about investigating the actual lives of the people I could be naming as general figures and numbers that we use in order to sound ‘cool’ and ‘intelligent,’ while neglecting even asking why such numbers and figures of poverty, starvation, war, crime, unemployment, rise of prices and any other act of corruption existed in the first place.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that exposing my selfish desires to ‘help the world’ would make me a ‘bad person’ not realizing that we have all been living lives masking our self interest with benevolence, goodness and ‘good will’ that has never in fact existed, as if it really had existed, we would have done something already about this world. Thus,

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to plan/ plot and project a life for myself based on being an ‘aware’ being, like the ultimate intellectual that could talk about all spheres of life in order to sound interesting, to even find a partner that could ‘fill in the gaps’ with more knowledge and information as an ‘intelligent being and socially aware – whatever such tag would in any way imply as ‘worthy’ to me – and a social-group of people that I could fit in based on my desires to have friends in elitist-intellectual positions as I deemed that to be ‘my spot’ within my life, and within this

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to admire, even idolize people that were these ‘examples’ in my life of what it was to read a ton of books, have huge libraries in their houses, collect art, have the ultimate sybarite lifestyle while being very aware of the system and talking about change while eating some form of delicacy with wine, which was the precise type of social reunions that I wanted to preserve in my life – and I repeat: while theorizing about the problems in the world, which is unacceptable.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to value who a person is according to the education they have, the knowledge and information about ‘the world system’ that they have memorized, because of having created my own standards of intelligence based on knowledge and information placed ‘at the service of humanity,’ which is where the revolutionary-intellectual character exists, never realizing that within this, I was supporting the very cogwheels that make this wordl system turn wherein knowledge and information is valued more than life, wherein all money is valued more than life without understanding how there could be no money, no real value if there was no actual physicality that we could in any way put a price tag on, including ourselves as ‘knowledgeable beings’ that can sell such ‘wits’ within the academic and intellectual circles in the form of books, lectures and general elitist-status of social investigators that may propose a ton of ways to create a change in this world but never in fact even consider how to make it a reality as a process of Self Responsibility by the individuals, because all solutions were only looked at in the form of opposition, revolution and further criticism of the system without looking at the monetary system as the source and core of the problem that must be corrected and aligned in this world to support Life in Equality.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to also use this accumulation of knowledge and information to gain the tags that people would generally see me as ‘acculturated intelligent person’ which became part of my ‘steps toward success’ in this world system because of having done all the research and deliberate accumulation of knowledge and information for my own benefit, to seem like a good doer, revolutionary, future ‘leader’ of change in self interest. I see and realize that there could be no actual good intention the moment that I was using knowledge and information as a form of reputation that I could later on Sell to the same system I was trying to oppose. I realize that within this world system, I tis not not oppose it or retaliate against it and try and make a living out of doing so, but instead become part of the system, educate myself, support other’s education in order to recognize the fact that there is nothing to oppose, but to align, correct and direct to an outcome that is best for all.

 

I realize that whenever self interest as our own personal benefit is in place when trying and ‘do good’ to this world can only backfire as a self-deception that we have to take self responsibility for, and that it is not to be judged any further other than taking the necessary actions to align our lives and our dedication to understanding reality not as a way to abuse such knowledge and information for our own benefit, but to in fact self-forgive any remains of personal/ selfish interest about ‘changing the world’ / making a change and take the necessary actions to be self responsible which doesn’t exist ‘out there’ as some major reform in the system at the moment, it begins with our every seemingly ‘unimportant’ thoughts in our head whenever we place ourselves on top of others, whenever we want to be ‘right,’ whenever we want to have the ‘right answer’ all the time which is a point that is not indicating anything else but the desire to remain in a knowledgeable and righteous position that actually does a lot of harm upon reality, wherein intellectualism has become part of the general abstraction of reality into nice words and pictures to depict the reality, instead of actually investigating how Reality operates, why such people have been neglected, how our very own lives depend on their suffering and abuse and how our very worlds of elitist first world lifestyles are stemming from another’s endless laboring days in conditions that no knowledge and information can change in this world.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to see the desire of changing the world as a ‘noble act’ within our society that I had to attain to in order to be part of a select-renowned group of people as an artist or intellectual, or linguist or whatever that I could be and become in order to get my ‘big part of the cake’ while holding an image of a ‘good doer’ in my society, and be known and praised and recognized for that, without realizing to what extent I had simply then acted in self interest all the time and never really caring as the actual expression of what that word implies about the reality of the people and situations and events I was only reducing to long strips of words that were not lived at all.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to read people’s biographies as in revolutionary people, artists mostly  as examples of what I wanted to be and become and within this starting point of fame, recognition, getting to be part of history books, desire to get to the ‘top’ and be ‘superior’ within my society as knowledgeable person/ an intellectual of ‘the greatest kind’ wherein I learned how this type of recognition was an acceptable way of becoming rich/ wealthy while still holding on a façade of ‘activist’ as a ‘good doer.’ I realize that I deliberately neglected the absurdity and paradox I would have made of myself by becoming rich out of opposing the system and the lack of integrity that really exists in all our so-called intellectual spheres in this world, where it is very nice and simple to talk and talk and talk about the problems in this world, blame the government or any other institution and always avoiding seeing one’s own life and the decisions made based on wanting to obtain a point of benefit in absolute self interest.

 

I commit myself to continue writing the revolutionary-elitist character out, in order to see how even in what could be spotted as ‘good intentions’ there were actual greedy interests behind it, most likely wishing to succeed only at an individual level and forgetting about the actuality, the physicality the actual living conditions of the people that are reduced to numbers, stories, figures that are sold in books and lectures and further story-telling journalism without proposing an actual living solution that can Stop such abuse and negligence in humanity. I commit myself to establish the Equal Money System as the common sense that is necessary in this world, which can hold no specialness or hero-like action, this is about the reality that should have always been but were too busy satisfying/ satisFRYING our own egos.

 

This will continue

 

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203. The Acceptance of Heaven is the Allowance of Hell

As humanity we have walked life after life not questioning anything in our reality, learning that things are ‘how they are’ because ‘that’s how it works’ and swallowing up this chill-pill-answer which in my case, I swallowed with some discontent initially – however, because I had no physical suffering, lack of food, lack of a house, lack of family, lack of education and learned that even though I was seeing suffering on the streets, being witness to hideous acts of madness – all was apparently ‘fine’ and we could still ‘enjoy’ and ‘have fun’ and seek for our greatest excitement and monetary success,  I simply learned to turn a ‘blind eye’ and being perfectly aware of every moment that I would compare my reality to that of children my age that had to be working on the streets, knocking door by door asking for food and clothes, me only reacting with absolute powerlessness every time, feeling sorry for a few minutes – then forgetting about it and continue with my happy go round life that was possible due to Money. Because, in the end,  what one learns at home when being in a middle-class society is to always aiming ‘higher’ in the social pyramid of greed and negligence and not really bother in trying to ‘save the world/ change the world’ as I had expressed some times – all of it actually stemming from me more feeling ‘bad’ about it than really even considering at that stage me being Them as in equally being here in this world, and that the acceptance of their condition held/ sustained my own pursuit of happiness.

This is similar to the acceptance of heaven and hell and my early obsession with polarity and wondering how I could only fathom ‘staying on the good side’ of BenEVILence, doing all I could to remain always at the good eyes of that god/ spiritual all-seer that I believed in and that became- along with my reality – the constant guiding forces while growing up: the social-conditioning of focusing on ‘aiming higher’ and the spiritual context (I apparently was not raised religiously, but ‘spiritually’ lol)  of doing good/ being a good girl/ aiming to ascend to the light realms when being dead. I did not know much about ‘heaven’ or the bible – but was well aware of Hell and I knew I had to avoid it at all cost. Now, this single neglect toward Hell/ Evil/ Demons the ‘Bad’ and Dark side of reality was almost like a taboo that no one wanted to talk about, not even talking about ‘death’ which obviously, lead me to later on develop my own fascination toward all the things that had been kept ‘unknown’ to me as part of any form of Education and Family/ Society, wherein all one focuses is ‘staying on the positive side! Be Happy! Seek for your own personal improvement!’ type of reality. But still, I was not satisfied.

 

I became a news fanatic when I was probably on my early teens and this was mostly beginning to wanting to understand the financial systems because of aiming at a career in such realms initially – obviously then veering off to the total opposite within hearing everyone say how I was absolutely ‘out of my mind’ if I even think I could create a change in this world – it bummed me out and that’s how I essentially Gave UP any form of actual career that would lead me to be In the system, the core of it in the money-markets and financial deals and veered toward that which I believed was more ‘humane’ such as socials sciences, ending up in literature and arts – which till this day even after all I see hold enough opening and consideration toward that which can create a change in this world if implemented at an educational level.

 

So this is a bit of a background of how I learned to ‘turn a blind eye’ on reality, essentially quickly conforming with everything that seemed like a ‘better option’ for me to take on in my reality, which suited what I was informed I had to aim at while growing up: being a successful person like my parents, in ‘whatever’ I decided to be and become. And I accepted that constant impulse as something ‘cool’ you know? Because I was being ‘cheered up’ by my parents every time that I ‘succeeded’ in my school, yet I always never felt quite happy with it, because I would go into ‘feeling bad’ about those that were behind me and were not even able of attaining a proper mark, even if I had witnessed they tried very hard to – and so this impotence grew and grew within me, not knowing why on Earth did I have it ‘so easy’ in  my life and others were struggling – and this, was my acceptance of ‘Heaven’  as something that was meant only for a few – and denying Hell as the reality of this world, as everything that I could see and perceive as being ‘behind me/ below me’ in any form of social taxation that I became aware of while realizing that there were kids my age – 6 –7 or even less – working on the streets, asking for food, asking for coins while their mothers fed babies next to them, on the sidewalk.  I allowed myself to just pretend that it is ‘fine’ and that they are somehow having to PAY for some awful act in some past life and that’s ‘why’ they are poor/ neglected and even receiving further abuse by the authority, the level of Injustice I became aware of really ‘brought me down’ into a constant state of depression and being sad about the state of the world, only later on and even today realizing/ remind myself how this is also a state of self interest, wherein I then certainly sought to escape from this reality through the realm of imagination, pictures, inspiration, seeking ‘beauty’ in this world where there was clearly non – all as a failed attempt to redeem life in one way or another, never ever considering to what extent I had ‘signed up the contract’ to be part of the ones that wanted to ‘change the world’ outside of ourselves, feeling ‘bad’ for the unfortunate ones and essentially committing myself to want to do some ‘good’ mostly from the starting point of me not feeling guilty for having had a rather privileged lifestyle, as opposed to what I would witnessed around me.

Continuation of the Elite Character

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I had to be and become ‘successful’ just like my parents, wherein this positive attitude and positive experiences was always linked to having money in our pockets and ensuring that we became ‘good savers’ and within that, giving some charity to those that had Nothing only to ‘share what we have’ without ever really considering how the very acceptance of us being able to give to ‘unfortunate ones’ that which we could spare them, implied the acceptance and allowance of inequality in this world as ‘how the system works’ wherein instead of learning about the creation of poverty and inequality that lead to social injustice, I con.formed to only feel ‘bad’ about them and give them money fro once in a while, giving  clothes away while creating an experience of powerlessness within me about them/ the unfortunate ones, which implies how I would only feel bad about them when being in their presence – yet remaining focused on my ‘aim’ to achieve my goals in life, which was mostly linked to being a good person/ doing good to others/ caring about ‘the world’ such as the environment, pollution – I did not even consider animals that much – and essentially creating this profile of being a ‘good person’ linked to success and most importantly, linked to a reward in the afterlife.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to brush aside the fact that I did believe in a light-realm where all the dead people would go to and I was aware of the so called ‘caves of darkness’ wherein I learned that people that had, for example, been participating in wars would go to, and that I would simply have to do everything I could to avoid going there – it wasn’t called ‘hell’ but just ‘darkness’ so, I had to avoid darkness which in this world translated to avoid ending up as a ‘no one’ with no-money/ no-light in this world and within that, see all people that were with no-light/ no-money and living on the streets, being absolutely helpless as people that had probably been inherently evil in some past life and within that justifying their existence as poor people/ unfortunate ones according to that ‘law’ which I later on became aware it was called karma.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to ‘do good’ in my life not because I genuinely cared about other beings, but because ‘I’ did not want to suffer and feeling bad when looking at them and realizing that I had ‘more’ than them – essentially thus any thought or intention of ‘doing good’ was directly linked to the inherent guilt and shame that I developed when and while growing up, due to me feeling powerless to do anything about their situation and as such, always only focusing on how I would experience myself toward the ‘unfortunate ones,’ and believing that I had to redeem Myself by being a good/ careful person even though I always felt awkward while pretending to be so, yet played the act because I wanted to be seen with ‘good eyes’ by society and ultimately by whatever force I was expecting on ‘the other side’ so, I did walk a life of ‘keeping score’ of being a good person, fearing doing ‘bad things’/ fearing ‘evil people’ and only promoting a way to ‘elevate ourselves’ in social conditions and even beingness such as being more ‘enthusiastic’ about life – wanting to ‘do good’ to the ‘less fortunate ones’ yet never in fact investigating what were the causes of their current unequal stance within the system, what was the reason why they were not being helped to have a dignified living and blatantly accepted then poverty just as part of my landscape, not bothering to question about it further because of not getting straight answers about it – thus con.forming, keeping quiet, turning a blind eye and instead focusing only on my personal world and satisfaction, escalating social statuses and aiming at all times to ‘be successful’ in whatever I decided to be and become.

 

I realize that my very starting point of ‘caring for others’ has never been something natural/ genuine to me, no matter how hard I tried to believe it was. But was mostly caused by the fear of having to ‘pay’ something/ someone in the afterlife for having been a ‘bad person’ such as having a ‘good life’ and in that, neglecting others’ realities such as the unfortunate ones, wherein I then tried to ‘do my part’ by seeking to oppose the system, criticize it, judge it and essentially pointing fingers at everyone else but myself, which is how I became self-righteous about my evil  (195. The Righteousness of Evil) and took it to the extent of denying vehemently that I was an equal and one participant of everything in this world that would case suffering, death, starvation in it – it really took me a while to understand how by just the single fact of me being Here as a breathing physical being, I was equally responsible for all that which I had turned a blind eye from for a very long time and how the very position of wanting to ‘do good’/ be a good person’ to the unfortunate ones was in fact blatant self interest, seeking to stop feeling ‘bad’ about those that had no money/ no support from anyone and within that, also earning ‘points’ toward a lightish/ heavenly experience, avoiding going to the ‘caves of darkness’ that I knew simply was something to avoid.

 

This became the foundation of ‘how I functioned’ in my reality, wherein for a long time what ruled me obviously was then only looking at the positive and doing essentially what I believed was ‘proper’ in terms of seeking to give charity/ support to the ‘less fortunate ones’ once that I had attained my elitist-supreme position that I did seek after in my mind/ imagination when thinking about professions and careers that I could direct myself to, which was not up to long ago some 6 years ago wherein I aimed at becoming a ‘well known’ artist so that I could then ‘speak up and change the world!’ because I apparently never stopped wanting to ‘make a change’ but I was precisely not wanting to give up my OWN benefits in order to see how everything works in reality and how I was directly responsible for that which I was trying to ‘save’ and ‘correct’ and ‘reform’ in this reality.

 

So, I commit myself to realize and accept the fact that I have never really genuinely ‘cared’ for other beings in an absolute unconditional manner, due to me always wanting to ‘add up to my score’ of doing something good to others, instead of realizing this is a matter of principle, of Understanding reality wherein once that you Understand, See and Realize how this entire existence functions, how the world system stems from our very relationship of the mind toward the physical, how energy and substance operate, what was heaven and hell and what they represent until today within our lives, how the world system functioned with a preprogrammed life path for all beings wherein there were by design some elitist beings that became the example and role model for the masses to attempt to ‘equate’ to  – while creating poverty, starvation, the ‘ostracized’ and marginalized people that were sustaining such wealth being absolutely disregarded out of the equation of any form of satisfaction and fulfillment. And within this all, realizing that there is No excuse at all to not stand up for life, not only because of it being our absolute responsibility, but because we are it – it is not even about creating a sense of ‘duty’ within it all, it’s about self-realization of us being that whole that is currently undergoing the ‘trials and tribulations’ that are nothing but the outcome of having lived entire lives only seeking to maintain an apparent ‘well being’ at the expense of others that were deliberately quieted/ shut down or even ostracized from the system in order for the majority to seek after the ‘good life’ here and in the hereafter, which became the most well known lie to be Sould in existence, not even only in humanity.

 

Thus I commit myself to realize that the starting point of myself within this process of Self-Equality and Oneness in Self Honesty implies realizing and recognizing the fact that one was initially motivated by obtaining something ‘good’ out of this, some form of ‘reward’ for walking process, without realizing that it is not about changing the world ‘out there’ for others, but changing My world With others – which is something you can read at Heaven’s Journey To Life which clarifies to the exact T. this subtle differentiation that makes actually a big difference with regards to the approach of ‘changing the world’/ wanting to go do good’ and all the points that we must consider before even being able to consider any form of ‘change’ within ourselves/ our reality.

 

I understand that Education is the fundamental aspect to this, as I am a witness of it myself. the more I educate myself about Reality with everything that is being presented as the Investigation of  Existence and this Reality through the Eqafe interviews, I become more certain about myself, my process, my understanding and playing my own ‘devil’s advocate’ to see where the hell there exist still any form of self interest to walk this process, which obviously cannot remain at all not a single iota of ‘convenience’ can determine my every move, otherwise it will be pointed out by myself in Self Honesty in order to realize that any form of Energy-seeking desire is Self-Dishonesty and that implies going to both the ‘good’ and the ‘bad’ as poles of the same energetic fix that the mind is always seeking for.

 

I commit myself to be absolutely self honest to any point of support that I commit myself to give to myself and share with others, in order to not create a certain persona of myself, standing up for ‘something good’ but simply realizing it is a single alignment and correction of how things should have always worked/ functioned in our reality. And this is then a matter of physical principles of living conditions, not of an egotistical approach to make ourselves feel ‘more’ than what we already are here.

 

I will continue  in the following posts debunking my acceptance of an elitist character within me, wanting to ‘do good’/ be good while still holding on mainly a personal self interest about it all to become ‘more’ than myself apparently.

 

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144. Obsessive and Possessive Patterns: My belongings

I had a dream wherein I was going to the farm with someone and realized that we had arrived without baggage. I saw how the other person seemed to not care at all about it, however I saw myself manipulating the moment by becoming anxious, desperate, talking in an acute voice tonality and moving around in a fast pace from side to side in an attempt to actually make others to ‘get the point’ and take us back to the airport to get our luggage.  It seemed that I was really possessed with the entire point of ‘getting my bag,’ feeling like ‘unprotected’ without it, and I questioned how it was that the other person was not really caring much about having no bag with himself.

And in that dream I can recognize a pattern of myself, which is how I tend to not Live in the moment whenever there’s something that is absolutely occupying my entire attention: I ‘forget’ about breathing and with that, everything else in the environment. In the dream I forgot to enjoy the arrival to the place and actually enjoying being there again – Instead, I was moving around, rushing and finding any and all ways to get back to the airport to get my stuff, literally being possessed to get a cab, find someone to get us/ me back to the airport. So, here some points walked in Self Forgiveness wherein I decided to hold and create the backchat and obsession of ‘wanting to get all my stuff right fucking now,’ projecting blame to other beings and as such, even missing out the actual cool moment to see everyone again as I was too busy throwing a fit about our bags not being with us, while deliberately hiding the fact that I had ‘forgotten’ about the baggage because of also getting caught in the entire point of meeting another person, which is also the subtle moments wherein I also tend to ‘lose sight of the moment’ and go into an absolute possession of ‘being meeting someone’ and creating an entire  experience about it in my mind, eventually forgetting about things/ losing things due to my attention being diverted to another one single point – quite a pattern. It was also interesting how the other person’s ‘unattached’ stance toward ‘belongings/ ownerships’ was in my face and making a point with it, yet I would react to it with further backchat instead of actually taking a moment to breathe and actually let go of the possession/ learn from his reaction to support myself that way.

 

So, within this blog I’ll walk the first dimension of the dreams as obsession wherein I was absolutely moving based on my self-interest, which seems like it’s  been the only way we have ever always ‘moved’ ourselves as humanity.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become ‘possessed’ by the stuff that I have defined as ‘my belongings’ wherein I simply became absolutely focused on ‘getting my stuff back no matter what,’ missing out each and every single moment of  breath, being spending my time with another/others for the very first time and ‘enjoying’ the entire moment, just because of wanting to ‘have all my shit together’ before settling down.

When and as I see myself being absolutely possessed by ‘my belongings’ the moment that for one reason or another I am not able to have it all together, I stop and I breathe – I realize that I cannot ‘change’ the events by becoming anxious and desperate to go back to get them – instead I simply direct myself to explain the point to someone else so that we can eventually get ourselves to ‘get our stuff back,’ instead of making such fuss and a big deal out of ‘not having my stuff,’ worrying and throwing a tantrum, fearing ending up without anything, which indicates the actual pattern wherein I see I can ‘lose myself’ from being here as breath: when missing out my belongings and ‘losing everything I have,’ which is actually related to how money is our security/ safety bubble, which is a point I opened up a couple of days ago.

I commit myself to actually realize the unnecessary distress and worry that I create in my mind as thoughts when wanting to ‘get what I want’ right away which is stemming from an actual fear of losing it all as well as my ‘happiness point’ wherein I got used to ‘having all I want’ right away, without realizing that who I am is here and that all I can lose is stuff that I have become possessed by as my belongings and turning them into my ‘point of stability’ in separation of myself here as breath –thus I realize that they are not ‘attached’ to my body and that I cannot define myself and my moment according to having them or not having them. I realize that use I give to all I have, however, it is not ‘the end of the world’ if I see myself without them all.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to within the thought of not having my bags with me, I immediately go into fear of loss as all the money invested on clothes and ‘personal belongings’ along with stuff that I had some type of ‘attachment’ toward, which indicates there is a point of possession that I am feeding as things = money that I can earn or lose in one go, within this not yet equalizing myself as everything that I have wherein I realize the current means and ways that one can get money being not ‘readily available,’ however, becoming possessed by ‘our belongings’ is definitely a mind-defined relationship instead of an actual realization of self-equality and oneness.

When and as I see myself reacting to seeing the thought of ‘my bag with all my belongings’ as a point of potential loss, I stop and I breathe – I realize that this attachment I have programmed through the value I have separated myself from and as money, which implies that there is no actual ‘loss’ as the who I really am in this reality, and that the loss is only a point of losing that which I had ‘made my own’ through the same means in which we have kid each other as apparent ‘owners’ of something – and even someone as well at times – that we can in fact ‘lose’ –

I realize I cannot lose myself as I am already here – and that all points of separation as ‘value’ upon a piece of what’s here that I had made/named ‘my belongings’ must be reviewed in order to realize in common sense this is how we currently exist as with regards to ‘things’ outside of ourselves, yet this in no way can define who I really am as the physical being that uses what’s here to live.

I commit myself to let go of the specific attachments I have created throughout time toward ‘that which is mine,’ and instead equalize myself to it, so that I do not hold this ‘strong definition’ based on what I see and believe is ‘important’ to me as belongings –this is an actual point to walk due to how I had defined the ‘who I am’ based on the stuff that I see and have a constant relationship with on a daily basis in my reality – being it clothes, computer, stuff in my room, artwork, ‘things’ that I have defined as ‘indispensable’ in my mind – yet never really seeing what is really indispensable and what is only keeping a certain dimension of self-possession in my mind.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react to the other being’s parsimony and nonchalant attitude toward the realization that ‘we had missed our bags/ left them at the airport,’ in which I saw the image of the being just laying on bed almost not ‘caring at all,’ while I was with my nerves all spiked up wanting to go to the airport ‘as fast as possible’ to get our stuff back – within this judging the being’s attitude as careless, lazy, complacent and passive, just because of the being showing little to no interest to be concerned the same what that I was with regards to ‘my belongings.’

When and as I see myself judging another being as ‘too passive’ and ‘nonchalant’ to deal with situations that I have defined as ‘emergencies’ wherein immediate action is required – I stop and I breathe – I realize that I have to actually slow down to see how reacting to another’s attitude of patience and parsimony is a way for me to complain about them not supporting my mind fuck.

I realize that I had in fact been judgmental and at the same time jealous of beings’ attitude toward loss, wherein I believe that they would have to be ‘going up in flames’ as well, but instead seeing them act and taking it all ‘without a care’, which is what I have taken as a crutch for me to react even more toward them and blaming them for ‘not giving a fuck/ not caring about the whole thing ‘the same way I do,’ and in this, actually taking a self-righteous position of me being the ‘good person’ because of caring ‘too much’ about the event, which is absolute self-manipulation to make myself ‘the winner/ the caring one’ within this entire event,  in this

I commit myself to actually stop always aiming to be the one with the ‘right judgment’ at all times, wanting to impose my view as ‘that which is right,’ which is the way that I still want to hold on to my mind in a self-righteous mode, instead I support myself to learn from others in fact, to see how it is possible to exist without an actual attachment toward ‘things’ in my reality and still manage to live.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that a person that ‘truly cares’ shows emotions of worry and preoccupation, rushing and ‘moving around in a fast pace’ as if such attitudes were in fact necessary when giving direction to a point that requires immediate to short term solutions. I realize that I have only created such belief in my mind based on parental patterns of rushing, preoccupying/ worrying about things and creating attachment toward things ‘of my own,’ without realizing that I cannot own, I cannot have ‘control’ over my reality and that any point of fear of loss must be confronted/ faced as the actual point of possession it represents: fearing losing ‘my belongings’ as ‘my stuff’ as a way to justify me being pissed off, exalted and rushing to get things ‘back to me,’ wherein I am only caring about me-me-me, my time, my stuff and moving everything and everyone I can to get my stuff back as a synonym of getting ‘my comfort, peace and security back’ which is unacceptable, as it’s mind possession.

When and as I see myself wanting to become emotional in anger or anxiety and distress when things are ‘not going my way,’ I stop and I breathe – I realize that this is just a mind fit that in no way assists and support ourselves to get things done, it is only a mind-driven reaction that serves no one. Thus

I commit myself to stop manipulating myself through emotions of anxiousness despair, worry and concern whenever I want things to get done the way that I want it, how I want it, as fast as I want it and in the moment that I want it which is precisely what I have lived as in my reality: subtly moving people around in a way wherein I can get a benefit and/or support to ‘do what I want/ get what I want,’ which is then the point to expose toward myself and eradicate, as I see and realize that it is in this seemingly ‘petty reaction’ that a great ‘chunk’ of my personality resides: moving and directing things as fast as possible when and where there is an immediate point of self interest to cover, while creating a negative reaction and backchat toward those that are ‘in the same situation,’ yet do not approve/ support my reaction/mindfuck the way that ‘I’ expected them to do, in this

 

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to always seek for at least 1 other person to ‘backup’ my mindfuck, wherein I am still wanting to get things done ‘my way,’ even if I know that ‘my way’ is absolute self interest and actual obsession in that moment. It is unacceptable to want to get at least one other person to ‘agree’ with my mind possession as a way to validate it as real and ‘a good reason’ to get what I want. In this

When and as I see myself deciding to act as a point of mind-possession wherein I am moving the earth and mountains to get my point of desire/ want and need done, I stop and I breathe – I realize that I am actually being possessed in this moment by the entire situation wherein I am not considering anything or anyone else BUT My point of happiness which is being obsessed with  become ‘getting it,’/ making it/ going somewhere and essentially, not stopping the mindfuck till it is satisfied/ done/ achieved– thus

I commit myself to stop supporting my own wants/ needs and desires that come up in a cyclic manner in my mind, and instead breathe and realize that if the point is in fact relevant to give direction to in common sense and placing self interest aside, I can direct myself to see the viable options –here as breath – to give direction to the point. However if it is only a point of ‘immediacy’ just because I say so, it’s absolutely unacceptable and as such must be stopped by myself immediately, as I see and realize that I am also involving others in ‘move’ that I have to also take into consideration at all times to make a decision that’s best for all. This way I ensure myself to not be immediately caught manipulating and controlling others to ‘get things done,’ but I instead take such points and walk them myself first in self honesty to ensure I am not possessed by my own interest to give direction to something/ someone

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to consider my obsessive-compulsive behavior as a curse and a virtue wherein the curse arises when becoming dependent on a particular pattern, getting things done and a virtue as this ‘gets me moving,’ without realizing that both starting points are equally fucked as they are stemming from an actual fear – of loss/ lacking/ being unprotected in this case – instead of being actual points of self-movement in the moment within common sense.

When and as I see myself becoming compulsive with regards to depending on a particular habit of extreme lack/ need in an urgent manner to immediately move, I stop and I breathe – I realize that there’s no need to create a situation of ‘extreme lack’ and ‘rush’ to get things done, no matter how it has worked ‘in the past,’ who I am cannot be repeating the same ‘effective formulas’ of myself in the past – thus I ensure that I actually walk a point without having to take it o the very last consequences before losing all time to move, and in this actually create a habit of distributing enough time and consideration to check all points required when and while moving, directing, doing something in our reality.

I realize that the ‘obsessive point’ of not stopping doing something until it is done can be a ‘cool thing’ if the starting point is clearly self-supportive at all times and it doesn’t become a one point to procrastinate and eventually do ‘all at once’ in the least amount of time possible – I realize that I have created this pattern throughout time wherein I had even involved ‘luck’ as a factor to determine things always ‘turning out well’ at the end when taking on a project, task or a single point to ‘move’ and direct, as I see and realize that this is hope here acting and not actual self movement at all times.

I commit myself to slow myself down to breath when the mind is rushing wanting and trying/ attempting to get something done. Instead I walk at the breathing pace to establish solutions according to the actual need and practical requirements of the solution.

 

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become thoughts as an experience wherein even in my dreams, and knowing beforehand that I can just breathe and exist ‘here,’ I allowed myself to be possessed by the worry and concern of ‘losing money’ through losing my bag, representing that attachment/ value that I have given to possessions that are in fact an imposition of property over that which is here from and of the Earth, transformed into ‘products’ that we buy and sell to ‘make a living’ within a delusional system wherein we created a big lie as monetary system in order to support the mind’s desire of power as an illusion that can only be ‘made real’ through imposing private property as ownership upon the Earth in the name of personal benefit and personal interest.

 

When and as I see myself getting concerned about ‘losing my belongings’ I stop and I breathe – I realize that ‘my belongings’ is but an imposition I have beLieved myself to be real in order to justify my point of control/ imposition over life for my own benefit. Thus, it is to see that it is the relationship created with money that which is to be reviewed the moment that we allow ourselves to be mind possessed/ obsessed with thoughts that indicate fear of loss while creating a point of need, desire and want to satisfy that ‘fear of loss’ – this indicates already the type of conflict that we create only in our minds while abusing the very physical reality that has allowed ourselves to ‘bear’ the mindfucks that we indulge in, the moment that we use the mind to create a point of worry, concern, going into obsession and thinking possession out of fearing losing something that was never ‘mine’ in the first place, which places into context how it is that I have accepted and allowed myself to be still regarding material possessions as ‘the point’ of possession even in the slightest /sly-test situations.

 

I commit myself to actually let go of the value, regard that I have imprinted onto ‘everything that I own’ as ‘my belongings’ to ensure that I in fact stop defining ‘who I am’ according to ‘what I own’ and as such, commit myself to review the attachments I have created toward my ‘material possessions’ as it is not even a matter of ‘how much money I have’ or how ‘expensive’ my belongings are, but the value and worth that I have given them in my mind as the ‘who I am’ being defined by such belongings.

 

This will continue…

 

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141. Making it or Breaking it

Stopping the conditions we have imposed to everything that we do, say and think as either positive or negative through aligning ourselves to always do, act, say, think that which is best for all, leading to an equal and one successful outcome not as a positive experience, but as the certainty of what is functional, viable and livable in a consistent and trust worthy manner as a practical system to implement on Earth that benefits all beings equally.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define everything I do within the polarity of making it or breaking it, where I am reducing what I am in every moment to a chain of events that can only accumulate to create an experience in my mind of being ‘correct’ and ‘incorrect’ as the winning and losing that I I had imposed to that which I do as an automatic thinking of reality and what I do. 

When and as I see myself defining what I do  according to projecting an outcome as either success or failure, winning/losing, being acclaimed/booed, being liked/disliked, praised/abhorred I stop and I breathe – I realize that the moment that I immediately create the making it or breaking it projection upon the moment of actually walking a point, is an imposition that can only exist as thoughts in my mind that I can immediately stop –

I commit myself to live the realization that supporting the ideology of making it or breaking as an invisible inherent pattern upon everything that I do, is in fact a dictatorship upon the expression and living realization of something that we decide to practically live and do based on the principles of what is best for all, wherein all that we are will be defined according to an accumulation of thoughts, words and deeds directed to create, be and do that which is best for all at all times.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to procrastinate beginning with a certain task because of already projecting myself within an outcome of either making it or breaking it, already going as far as thinking that I will fail and that it will be a tedious process to ‘get back up again,’ or ‘making it’ and then feeling a pressure to ‘keep myself up on the top,’ without realizing that both points as the negative and positive are equally deceptive and self-sabotaging, as I see and realize that both standards can only exist in a hierarchical make-believe value that exists because of how we have configured our world and society based on the ‘who we are’ as our mind, valuing knowledge and information, reducing ourselves to only thinking-machines instead of considering life within everything that we do, which means we would not require to even have such standards as ‘making it or breaking it’ – but simply directing/ doing something and walking it into completion, with all its necessary fine-tunings, try outs, ‘mistakes’ as ways to see what is functional, what suggested to do/follow through and its improvements directed to an actual general living-improvement for all beings equally.

 

When and as I see myself seeking to get a result in a particular task I am beginning and already future projecting onto a certain outcome as either ‘making it or breaking it,’ I stop and I breathe – I realize that both polarities stand as points of conflict in and as the parameters of a mind within winning and losing as positive and negative experiences. Thus I direct myself to stop all polarities as expectations of making it or breaking it when working on a particular project, as I realize that working within the starting point of what is best for all implies that there cannot be a success or a failure but simply effective and non effective/ not practical ways to do something. Within this

 

I commit myself to stop all polarities imprinted within the very words as values that indicate a success or a failure as these are words that support the creation of an experience as positivity and negativity upon our words, thoughts and deeds as things that accumulate to either make us a winner or a loser. I realize that when living through and as the principle of what is best for all, one cannot define what we do within the same old parameters that have created this entire world as a winning and losing arena, but instead look at thoughts, words and deeds as the reflection of ourselves and how we are able to direct ourselves to create, develop and promote what is best for all, which is how all can equally benefit from everyone’s thoughts, words and deeds and as such, create an actual living ground for all other living beings on Earth.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize how I had created a measuring point of winning and losing/ being successful or a failure within everything that I do, going into a point of frustration as negativity if things ‘don’t go my way’ and generating the opposite experience as positivity if I am able to ‘do things my way,’ which means that I had defined my own mind-dictatorship upon reality as something that I could manipulate to suit me or not at mind level, without realizing that: when working, living, breathing and existing from/ as the starting point of equality and oneness here as Life, there is no need to create either a positive or negative experience out of an outcome/ result of an application based on the principle of what’s best for all, as I see that a positive experience supports the same hierarchical system of values as this world system wherein for something to be successful in the current terms of how this word exists, others have to deliberately lose/ have a negative experience and not ‘making it’ – thus

 

When and as I see myself measuring myself as my activities and projects according to winning and losing, I stop and I breathe. I realize that I am imposing  a mind hierarchy upon my every-day living participation, which is in fact being a dictator upon my reality which is what must be realized as such in order to understand that I do not require to Think or create an experience upon my daily tasks, projects and future practical planning, instead of going into suppression of the positive and negative through only wanting to expect to ‘win’ at all times.

 

I commit myself to change the starting point of everything that I do/make, say, think to always consider what is best for all, wherein the necessary actions and decisions are made to ensure that such principle is lived and is practically functional within such projects/ future plans, as I see and realize that it is only through setting an equal value to all and everything that we do as equally ‘important’ that we can stop looking at our own thoughts, words and deeds as tools to earn money/ lose money as winning or losing, as the positive and negative experience that we have conditioned ourselves to when living in a world where life is not unconditionally supported, but instead made a business that we all ‘strive to’ be a part of for our own personal benefit – instead, we change the starting point so that we are always educating ourselves, doing, thinking and projecting only that which is best for all, as there will be no more ‘rewards’ that can create a sense of success above others, but only create at all times that which will have an impact to better the lives of all beings on Earth.

 

I realize that in an equality system, everything will be measured according to the ability and capability of a point being practical, livable, trustworthy in its application as that which will produce a result that is constantly and continuously best for all.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that creating an experience out of a basic practical activities is enslaving ourselves to always expect either a reward as the positive experience or a ‘loss’ as negative experience wherein we instead act out of fear of losing instead of acting as the self-directed living principle to support ourselves and others in common sense as doing, saying and living what will be supportive for all life in equality.

When and as I see myself wanting to immediately assess a point of failure and success as an experience to either feel good about myself or bad about what I’ve done, I stop and I breathe, I realize that I was only then considering MY point of satisfaction/ dissatisfaction instead of always ‘keeping in mind’ that I am here to be,do, say and speak that which is best for all beings in Equality.

I realize that the fear of failure and fear to ‘lose’ any position of success stand as the polarity of fear fueling the desire to obtain that ‘glorious’/ positive experience as an external point of motivation to keep going/continue existing just as a mind-pattern that in no way supports Life on Earth, but is only a system of survival wherein no physical-equality measures exist yet, as products, jobs, activities are currently being measured according to the ability to create ‘quality products’ that equate ‘great profit’ – wherein such great quality might stem from an actual job of slave labor.

Thus I commit myself to ensure that as we go creating, building, manufacturing and venturing ourselves to create an equal and one supportive standard for all activities and points to do in this world,  to ensure that all activities/ projects are in fact done through and by the standard of what is best for all, wherein no more useless homework, tasks, projects are wasted time and effort upon, but to actually consider educating children – and adults at this stage as well – to recognize our ability to create/ do/ generate what’s best for all as the inherent starting point of everything we do,  depending on what is available, sustainable and supportive to do and direct, having a best for all impact upon the community/ people/ environment/ beings that will be affected by such decisions and choices made.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself for having defined all that I’ve done as being living ‘for something’/ to get ‘something/ someone’ as a positive experience in separation of myself, instead of first focusing on me equalizing all activities, all tasks that I do in an equal manner, wherein no task is immediately labeled as either prone to be a ‘winner’ or a ‘loser,’ a ‘success’ or a failure.’

 

When and as I see myself only living to ‘get a result,’ to aim at an objective, to only ‘be productive,’ I stop and I breathe – I realize that these are ingrained patterns that I exist as, and as such it is to really be here grounded as breath to not allow ourselves to waver and thinking that something is immediately a success or a failure as a positive or negative outcome  from the get-go, which is actually a self-sabotage point that I stop here to realize that every practical point that we venture ourselves to implement will have its points to correct, its initial flaws and corrections/ fine tunings to make, as this is the first time that we are doing this self-realization living-decision in an existential level in the physical –thus it is to be aware of ourselves not immediately giving up or going ‘overboard’ when having a point that works/ is successful and the same with something that doesn’t initially work/ fails initially, as I see and realize that one could only give up upon these results if one is only interested in winning7 getting something out of it for personal benefit immediately, instead of actually being committed to live and created what is best for all.

 

I see and realize that this is the actual practical way and path required to walk through in order to get something done, wherein everything that we do is not result-driven, and instead considering the actual process of doing so being equally important, as I realize that when we equalize everything and all within who we are and what we do as what’s best for all, there is no need to judge any point or activity as being more/ less than, being a success or a failure as all will be measured according to that which is best for all, that which supports life and within that, only that which is harmful and deliberately detrimental to life will be discontinued as a deliberate decision that is common sensical at all times.

I commit myself to establish the Equal Money System as the basic foundation to create a world in equality, wherein everyone will be supported unconditionally so that we as human beings can focus on developing the best ways and systems that can be implemented on Earth to support life in equality, thus there will be no success or failure, as such points were based mostly on winning/ losing money to live – thus Equal Money is the key to ensure that there is no more positive or negative experiences required from our self-movement in our world, but instead simply focus at all times on doing what is best for all.

 

Join us to walk the process of equalizing ourselves as life in the physical, wherein all conflict/ success created at a mind level is stopped, self forgiven and self-directed to an equal and one outcome wherein life is ensured to be equalized for all beings on Earth.

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134.‘Gotta be On TOP at All Times’

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize and see who am I within wanting to ‘secure’ a position on top of others wherein I have deliberately side-viewed/ neglected and ignored the fact that within me wanting to be ‘safe’ within a point of superiority fulfilling my wants, needs and personal desires and creating an entire personality as ‘superior/ greater/ confident/ powerful’ being, I am in fact existing as the absolute fear to lose that which I have defined myself to Only be, such as that point which makes me feel powerful and superior – being it money, relationships, knowledge – which is in fact everything that we have separated ourselves from, getting ourselves to the extent of fearing losing such point outside of ourselves because it is all that we have defined ourselves to be.

I realize that within the current configuration of the world as capitalism, we have abdicated our self-worth and self acceptance to whether we are ‘worthy’ at the eyes of the world-system to make money, to get sex, to be ‘successful’ and as such learning that it is only through these means that we can in fact be ‘great’ and ‘fulfilled’ in our living, which is an absolute lie as the story that’s never told is how for some to be successful and have all the money and all the successful-lifestyle, there must be those that invariably must be the losers, the slaves that work to sustain the earthly-heavenly experience that can only exist as the abusive illusion that money has enabled as a possibility – and our reality today – while justifying those that are abused as ‘the losers’ as inept, incapable, not good enough, not worthy enough to have equal opportunities to also aspire to get a life-worth-living, which is absolutely unacceptable.

When and as I see myself wanting to secure my position in an apparent point of stability within money, relationships as the entire suit of success – I stop and I breathe – I rather look at everything and everyone that must be ‘underneath’ me in this hierarchical world system in order for me to apparently ‘remain’ in such a position that is only held by money and relationships in this world system, wherein all that I have complied myself to be is the outflow of mind-indoctrination to be and become the next ‘big hit’ in my own mind in comparison to others, thus I direct myself to see and consider the lives of those that must be abused, that must be deliberately ‘left behind’ and below in order for me to be on top, to get ahead everyone else as ‘my goal in life’ and ‘My fulfillment.’

I commit myself to expose any dream of being successful and the ultimate powerful person as the actual point of self-abuse that is accepted and allowed currently in this world as a form of justifying the inequality that is necessary to keep an unequal system running making such points of ‘success’ and ‘loss’ possible. I realize that there can be no actual success if inequality exists, if abuse exists thus

I commit myself to expose the current accepted and allowed conception of ‘success’ as a nice way to cover up a deliberate form of abuse toward others that are seen a ‘less than’ and ‘unworthy’ so that only a handful can be seen as worthy, as powerful and successful.

 

“Interesting, that: the more money one have, the more time, effort and attention one can spend in/as one’s Mind in manipulating one’s physical-body and physical-reality to suit one’s personal wants, needs and desires in standing in the limelight within/as one’s own Life/World. That this is what each human being in this world in our relationship with Money, want, need and desire – the riches of the Earth/this World as what the consumerism giant provide.” – Sunette Spies*

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to indulge within thinking of myself as someone greater, superior, powerful without even taking a look at ‘who am I’ within wanting to be a powerful person Above others and how this desire to be ‘on top’ of others is in fact the very mechanism in which this current society and capitalist system is founded upon.

I realize that I had been indoctrinated as a child to always seek to be ‘on top’ and remain ‘untouchable’ within such position as that would guarantee my ‘happiness,’ which is how I allowed myself to create an absolute fortress around me as a character to maintain my own ‘position’ secured in my world as ‘the best/ the greatest/ the most intelligent one,’ which supports the entire polarization of our reality wherein for some to be winners, others have to stand and be regarded as the losers.

When and as I see myself indulging into thoughts of me being the greatest and scheming ways to remain in such alleged position in my world, I stop and I breathe – I direct myself to in such moment realize to what extent I am separating myself from my physical body, considering myself as a physical being that cannot in any way be ‘more’ than other bodies as flesh and bones – thus

I commit myself to expose the superiority/ vanity/ egotistical thoughts that support the narcissist character wherein I stand as ‘the king of the world’ in my reality, through my own backchat and internal conversations – thus It is to realize how such seemingly ‘innocent’ thoughts become in fact the building blocks of who we are as the illusion of the character that believes itself to be ‘more’ than others, simply to fulfill one single belief of ‘power and control’ over others, which is in fact what must be exposed as the point of abuse and illusion as there can be no power in existence other than the physical that we have separated ourselves from, while existing only as a mind that wants to be and become ‘greater’ than others.

 

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize how when I am busy in my mind scheming and participating in thoughts, internal conversations and backchat finding ways to remain on the top, to get to the top, to ‘beat’ another in any form of rivalry or competition that I have created in my mind, without realizing how this is what further contributes to the inequality in this world wherein who we are has been diminished to values/ worth and perceptions of who we are within a system wherein Money as the ultimate power dictates ‘who’s who in the zoo’

Thus, I realize that whenever I participate in thoughts and dreams of getting to be the greatest and the most ‘powerful,’ I am in fact saying that I am willing to abuse, manipulate and corrupt myself and others in order to make ‘MY dream come true’ and secure ‘MY place’ in this world as being the most powerful, greatest being, which is an absolute demonstration of vanity wherein we don’t want to actually look at and realize who and what we are directly and indirectly abusing with us keeping such desires to be and become ‘more’ in our minds.

When and as I see myself scheming ways to get ‘on top’ of others in the ultimate position of power as ‘success’  — I stop and I breathe – I direct myself to instead see how I am practically able to support myself to be an example of how I can stand in and as equality and oneness which is the point that will certainly then enable everyone to be equally supported, wherein All can have the same ability to have a dignified and ‘successful’ living wherein success is no longer defined by being ‘more’ than others or ‘beating’ others in a race, but a general well being that will be available for all once that we establish a living-system of Equality such as the Equal Money System wherein we will learn how to honor each others as equals and any desire to be ‘more’ than others, will be treated with professional support and assistance to re-align the being’s life to that which is best for all.

I commit myself to thus consider each and every single being whenever I am only thinking about ‘MY own success, MY own desires, MY own dreams of getting to a successful point in my world’ as I see and realize that it is only through re-aligning any point of personal interest to the interest of what’s best for ALL that I am able to then expand my perspective and realize the abuse that stems from chasing after my personal-interests and pleasure/ satisfaction creates when being created at the expense of other beings in inequality.

“I commit myself to show how/why this calls for the re-education of the Human Being that is in fact very uneducated regarding the principles of Life and Living, very ‘intelligent’ regarding how to manipulate, deceive, remain ignorant of reality, and abuse for the sake of survival and money, but actual COMMON SENSE as having the sense, the ability to SEE and SENSE with and as that which is COMMON, EQUAL, ONE as this physical existence and us all within and as it: do not exist.” –Sunette Spies

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to immediately react in jealousy the moment that I see someone ‘climbing up to MY spot’ within the perceived powerful successful position, wherein I then justify all means and ways to ensure that such individual/s do Not make it on top  -and as such, believing that creating a competition and definite rivalry is the way to ‘reclaim my place’ which is nothing else but actual fear of losing the privileges and ‘secured’ position of superiority.

I realize that in this current world system competition is reinforced and promoted as a way to ‘become better’ every time as it’s been proven how individuals work ‘better’ when under pressure and/or threat to ‘lose their jobs/ position’ in a particular scenario within this world system – thus ensuring that ‘competition’ remains as the method of excellence to ensure that people remain doing ‘the best they can’ and giving all their effort to it simply because of not wanting others to take their position and become ‘more’ than them.

When and as I see myself going into jealousy when and as perceiving that someone is going to ‘get my place,’ I stop and I breathe – I direct myself to simply remain constant and consistent in my application wherein I realize that playing the competition game in my mind only adds further stress as the fear of loss toward such position that only exists as a concept of superiority in my mind. Furthermore I realize that accepting a point of competition as ‘real’ implies that I am in fact giving into a form of fear wherein there must be a winner and a loser, thus moving only through and as the starting point of Fear instead of it being a clear self directive decision to move.

 

I commit myself to expose all forms of hierarchy as an atrocity against life and exposing it as the actual carrot on the stick mechanism to keep everyone busy ‘climbing the ladder of success’ all the time, without realizing who and what we are damaging in such moments, which is ourselves and the life that we abuse to remain in our powerful/ almighty bubbles of money that must burst in order to realize the reality that is here covered up with the illusion of ‘control’ that we have created through and as our current monetary system.

 

I realize how the only real value of Life is Life itself and that we can instead support each other to work together and learn how to coexist and co-create within the starting point of oneness and equality as life, as this is the only way wherein everyone can Win equally, because there will be no more abuse in the name of maintaining a polarized society of abuse.

 

I commit myself to spot myself whenever I see me wanting to be ‘On Top’ and ‘The Most Successful’ and See the abuse and exploitation that the mere existence of such ‘positions’ within the world system represent, as there is no ability to be ‘successful’ in this world at the moment without abusing others to create such perception of power and control that exists as an actual fear of realizing that we are not in fact of control of ourselves as our physical, as our minds, as the environment which already indicates the level of limitation and delusion that exists as this feeble concept of ‘superiority’ masking an absolute fear to in fact be apparently ‘nothing else’ yet nothing more than an equal and one part of the whole that has been subdued to a set of energetic fixes that we are here to Stop and finally realize what’s ‘behind’ these experiences as an actual physical reality that can certainly be ordered, managed and directed to be beneficial for all beings equally. 

“Interesting, that even within the World System itself, what is promoted is the Mind, thought, consciousness, imagination, visualization, energy…everything of that which completely separate self from reality, the physical, that is real, here. The World System promoting human beings in the Mind to such an extent that we’d focus on things the Mind feed us, the World System feed us – consumerism, images, fantasies; but would not give a moment’s consideration to the countless of human beings in PHYSICAL REALITY suffering from starvation, famine, war, poverty – keeping us preoccupied in the Mind, within our own MINDS to not see the reality of what we’re creating as this world/earth for a select minority of Humanity to finance and substantiate their Hollywood Minds.

And so, changing the human, from self-interest as what we’ve done with how we created ourselves in/as the Mind to serve only our own wants, needs and desires and so in fact change ourselves/our living to what is/will be BEST FOR ALL.” 

Sunette Spies*

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99. Sentencing Ourselves as Words

 

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use words as a way to denote one’s significance, worth and merit according to a system of values that have been agreed by default in our society built as our ‘language,’ wherein we learn that we have to qualify the subject with either a positive or negative experience and to build our own personality around such words as a way to exert our individuality and ‘free choice’ upon our ‘lives.’

 

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use words as a way to set ‘living standards’ that in no way denote/ consider and represent what is best for all living beings as equals, but instead created and use words as the very cages that we have caged life with such as judgments, opinions, values and experiences that can only exist at a mind level that we have imposed onto reality by the very fact that we use words to sentence and define/ limit ourselves and others as either more or less than ourselves here as life in as the physical.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use words as a way to indicate a ‘moreness’ experience in/as our  minds as words that in no way denote a physicality but only a mind reality that is able to be manifested only through abusing others in order to portray a point of power/ control as superiority over others.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Not take Responsibility for every word that I say, wherein words become the very sentencing process toward myself, ourselves and our reality just because of existing as a mind that will always look for and search for ways to exert its ‘power’ over life, not realizing that it is also life and that it is currently only serving the point of separation that has been perpetuated throughout our existence as human beings simply because we never questioned words themselves as an imposition toward life, we never questioned how come we are able to diminish ourselves/others through words and how we have come to establish our entire world-system as it currently exists based on the premise of separation and inequality –

within this

 

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to walk through my own vocabulary to see, realize and understand how I create my own reality through the very choice of words that I use in order to express/ depict/ represent who am I in this very moment of speaking – and as such, walk a definitive process to become aware of my words being at all times self-supportive and within that, becoming the directive principle of who I am as words in order to stop defining myself according to the words I speak in separation of myself – this implies that I direct myself to become aware of the words that imply myself as being a concept, a character, a judgment that will impose itself onto a physical reality that is at all times unconditionally here and that in no way words have been wrought and created in order to honor life, but have only been created to satisfy a mind that thrives upon friction, conflict, separation and further dissociation from the physical reality, as it is only through us using words as an illusion of self that we continue looping around a point of conflict stemming from the very separation that we manifest with our own words through thinking, speaking and directing such words without awareness of self here. 

 

I realize that taking responsibility for the words I speak implies me slowing down myself to breathe in every moment to not be ‘carried away by the moment’ wherein I load words as memories of the past in order to perpetuate the characters I had accepted and allowed myself to diminish myself as, but instead, become the directive principle to ensure that each word that I word myself as is an indication of the process I am committing myself to – and within this, realizing that stepping out of character will mean a reverse of the evil that we have become through and by our own words into the Life/living reality that has always been here as ourselves, but that we just have neglected because of having become used to seeking, wanting, desiring and needing to feed the ‘who we are’ as our mind that is energetically based, while the physical runs through and by the consumption of other physical parts in order to continue living – which means that words in no way can nurture life unless they are directed to physically and practically manifest ways in which this life can be equally distributed for all living beings on Earth.

 

This means that in order to stop the separation of words as ourselves as different values that create worth and consequentially a monetary system, we have to purify who we are as words – becoming aware of the vocabulary we have used to in essence sentence each other, dictate ourselves and spell our reality into and as a human race that could only Think reality but never live It in fact.  What this points out to is the realization that we have never in fact lived, because our very words were directed to only satisfy the ego of the mind, the digitalized personalities that we have diminished ourselves to as a ‘mind that think’s instead of being a body that lives.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to ever believe that my judgments toward another being, another aspect of my reality ‘are in fact real because I see it’ – without realizing to what extent I have conditioned myself to see according to what I want to see, ,which has only suited my needs, desires and so-called purpose/ mission in life, wherein I aligned all my life, decisions and apparent choices in life to satisfy this moreness idea of myself that could prevail upon others as a meaning of success.

 

Within this, I realize how the very acceptance of words like ‘lack’ or ‘scarcity’ as well as ‘poverty and famine’ themselves are an indication themselves of being an aspect  of abuse that we have come to integrate as ‘part of our vocabulary’ without ever daring to stop and see how such words were accepted as a reality imposed whenever one part/ aspect of the whole was able to exert control and power over the rest of existence, which implies that we are all equally responsible because for one/ few to rule over the majority, the majority must accept such ‘power and control’ as real, which means that

 

I forgive myself that I ever accepted and allowed myself to use and exist as the word ‘victim’ and ‘victimization’ as a way to abdicate my own responsibility toward myself, the words I speak as myself and the totality of who I am as the physical which is at the moment for myself establishing me as breath here wherein ‘Who I Am’ is no longer defined by a set of characters that can be read like a novel with ups and downs, positive and negative aspects, but can only instead be a living flesh that lives words as the realization that who I am can only be expressed through words that take into consideration what’s best for all, and who and what we are as the physical.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to sentence myself in separation of life through the words spoken without awareness of what is it that we are in fact saying about ourselves, expressing ourselves wherein the very essence of our being is subjugated to a fantasy reality, an artificial creation in the mind through logic that never stood as common sense as what’s best for all, but only stood as words arranged into a ‘logical aspect’ that could fit the fuzzy logic of ourselves as mind system seeking to always saturate and satiate its necessary fix of energy to continue existing as the very consequence of the separation of who we are as life itself.

 

I realize that words as capsules of energy is who we are as well, as nothing exists ‘outside of self,’ and as such I commit myself to study how I created who I am as the mind in relation to this energetic dependency to exist, instead of having embraced, realized and understood life as one and equal as myself, which implies that no energetic dependency – such as thinking, becoming emotional, participating in feelings – is essential and indispensable for life to continue.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create an ‘abomination’ of reality through the very acceptance of all the processes, points, events that have to be accumulated in order for something to get to the point of ‘abomination’ as a reality that we all exist as, which points out to what extent that which we/ I see through my eyes as a point that I can ‘judge,’ is always in essence me judging myself as that point that I haven’t  yet accepted and allowed myself to forgive myself for in absolute, specific and detailed manner, as I am becoming aware of how one single word can activate an entire backchat that I have also held as ‘normal,’ because of never having had anyone ‘teaching/ sharing’ with ourselves how we are the very creation of and as ourselves and that everything we do does have an impact on the whole, and a such,

 

I realize that I am the one that is able to determine Who and what I am in every moment that I am here – wherein breathing and directing myself as the physical is the way to start looking at all the points I have separated myself from as my mind, as I see, realize and understand that everything that ‘comes to my mind’ is actually me revealing to me the points that I have to walk in order to establish myself as the absolute walking of self-correction at all times/ moments – realizing that we will never be able to ‘change the world’ if we don’t change and revisit the very words we speak and use to create this world as.

 

I commit myself to establish a vocabulary for myself/ all that honors and dignifies who we are and as such, to purify ‘who we are’ as the words that we have created and used to diminish or aggrandize ourselves with which can only exist as a concept in separation of self as life. Thus I realize that in order to establish a new humanity, words must be purified, corrected and proven day by day as a living-reality that is sustainable within the principle of what’s best for all, as only living words is what will remain in a physical world – every other word that stands for the ego of the mind, that stands as a perpetuation of the very consciousness that we have enslaved ourselves to, will have to come to an end – but the end won’t come as a magic wand that can be thrown back as another spell, but it is an actual living and physical corrective process wherein we walk through the consequences of having casted spells out as words in separation of self-here as one and equal and as such, learn how to express, create and communicate as equals with and as everything that is here, which implies that words will be devoid of any human egocentrism in order to recognize and expand equal abilities to all and everything that is also Here as ourselves in this world – plants, animals, environment, ‘invisible particles – that we have simply veiled ourselves from because of existing as a mind that thinks reality but never lived As Life/ reality/ the physical in itself.

 

Within this, I understand that each one holds the key to life as our own process of self correction and that as such, walking our very own judgments, opinions, beliefs, ideas, perceptions/ assumptions built as language in itself is the key to establish what is real as the physical and what is not – what serves life in equality and what served and energetic mind-game of winners and losers.

 

I commit myself to the realization here in order to live it as myself – and within this, realize that every moment I indulge into a point of separation through words spoken without awareness, I am in fact continuing and contributing to the already detrimental selves that we have become, blinded by our personal fixes while they worlds asphyxiates with the effects of our godly sins and indulgences in separation of life as one and equal.

 

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Continuing from…


76. Art Saves: My Religion Exposed

 

Within looking at how I used my career choice initially as a way to ‘Get by’ and ‘a way out of the system,’ I am looking at how I would justify this decision by establishing relationships with people that would support and involve myself within such ‘life decisions,’ which is how I came to defend ‘our view’ the same way that any other religious person would defend their belief, which is something I was able to spot due to the latest Soul of Money interview How the Soul predetermined Human’s Relationship to Money – which also allowed me to understand how everything seemed ‘so perfect’ in terms of the relationship I had with specific people and ‘their dreams’ being ‘my dreams’ as well – all in all just the perfect way to feed my preprogrammed life and ensure that I would not delve myself any further than that which caught my attention first, which was art.

 

One of the reasons why I confirmed my ‘chosen path’ in life was due to having met the ‘most important relationships’ in my life because of art/ music, which was almost like a ‘miracle’ – ehm ehm preprogrammed – point in my life wherein I really believed that I was ‘meant to be’ with that person, I was meant to be doing that and that ‘god’ had given me such a good life with the opportunity to be an artist and have fun all the time – yes, this was MY religion and I would justify it with anything I could to maintain it ‘as is.’ No different to any Christian that pops eyes out when revealing the truth of the actual energetic kick they get of any rite – I had my rites and being with someone that backs up your religion with equal fervor ‘locks you’ into that self-belief with more candor than ever, making common sense literally nonexistent as all that exists is this glorious weedy ride where all is creation, art, laughter, enjoyment and chatting about existential matters that in no way regarded LIFE on Earth.

I would spend time at the terrace just taking pictures of the sky, hearing music, drawing, ‘living life’ in such peace that you know, everyone would like to just ‘stay like that forever’ – never daring to look at the real reality of human beings –why ruin such a moment? Everyone would think, and I also thought the same way until I dared to take off the blindfold for once and for all.

High-in-the-sea

2004

 

Some Self-Forgiveness for such existential-conversations with arguments to back up the Religion of Self as ‘the artist.

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to believe that I in no way could ever see myself in a 9-5 job, saying that ‘I am way more capable than that,’ which was an obvious excuse and justification to ponder myself as this ‘artist’ that is ‘above’ the regular people and has this ‘special gift’ that makes her beyond the regular mortals, which is absolutely egotistical and self-centered statements where I was in no way aware of the reality of the world, but only caring about fulfilling my dreams and being with people that could whole-heartedly agree that they would not be able to see themselves in such a way either

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that because I could not see myself doing anything else than ‘art,’ I had the perfect excuse to never have to have a ‘regular job’ because apparently, I knew better and my life was ‘too special’ for that, which is the entire ego that got inflated by myself, my own thoughts, people around me throughout my life that also agreed that I had this ‘specialness’ in me that would get me into ‘very high places,’ lol never really realizing that they were only supporting my own ego-high that I even made real through becoming a religious weedy ‘ritualistic’ person, believing that my career was almost like a ‘divine gift’ and that I was able to have a ‘great life’ this life for some ‘good karma’ or something, which is how I justified and excused following my desires, having a good life and excusing poverty in this world as ‘bad karma people.’ Which is how I simply at that time ‘stopped caring’ about the world, because I was justifying everything with spirituality

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to judge everyone that had what I called ‘an ordinary life’ which was linked to having a ‘regular job’ and having to spend all day at work/ with kids and family, which I deemed like a curse to someone, just to be able to justify my desire to escape the system through my career.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to believe that my career as ‘an artist,’ could be the perfect excuse for me to not follow (and wallow according to my self-belief) into the family system of having kids, getting married, ‘settling down’ in just one place because I was busy following dreams of traveling, being famous, remaining ‘unsettled’ and ‘without a compromise’ with anything or anyone else than ‘art,’ which means that ‘art’ became my religion and my ‘savior’ from ‘the system,’ as an entire personality suit that I used to avoid having to take responsibility for myself and looking at the world that only ‘served me’ as inspiration, but in no way was I considering how to practically assist and support myself and others to make it a better place.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to believe that ‘living an ordinary life doesn’t allow you to expand and be creative’ which became like a mantra that I would repeat myself wherein ‘ordinary life’ meant having a proper job, family, money, desires for success and having a cool position within the world-system through business and professions that had nothing to do with ‘artistic careers,’ which is how I used ‘art’ as an excuse to be an ‘eccentric person’ meaning out of the ‘usual drill’ of living, which is nothing else but justifying the actual fear of having to face myself in the world system and be In it as a regular participant, believing that I could surely live of art and being ‘an artist,’ just because everything had been ‘so easy for me,’ which started becoming a self-religious belief wherein everything would come ‘with ease’ to me, believing it had to be like a divine gift of sorts for me to be able to enjoy ‘my life’ in this life as some type of good-deeds-in-the-past-life reward. Absolutely unacceptable.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to believe that I would not be ‘free’ if I had a husband and children, and equating marriage and children to a prison, a jail that I would run away from and even react in obvious disgust whenever anyone dared to question my ‘beliefs’ around marriage and having children in the future, just because of linking it to being bound to one place, having an ‘ordinary life’ when all I wanted was to be a ‘free spirited person’ that can ‘create’ and move around with no commitment, which would have actually lead me nowhere because the system simply does not work like that – meaning: to make money, you must be stable and committed to one point to work it through and finding odd ways to make a living is often leading to massive uncertainty in all aspects of our lives, which is why people that ‘make it’ are the most ‘settled,’ and within this understanding I see and realize that in order to equalize myself as the system, I must ‘settle down’ within the understanding and commitment to stand equal and one to the system of money and finally get past the ‘fears’ of being ‘ordinary’ as a self-belief.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to believe that having a family, getting married, having a regular job implies constricting any form of ‘freedom,’ which implies that I believed myself to be ‘free’ in any form, never ever actually realizing how nothing and no one is Free until ALL is Free – and in that, simply using excuses and justifications for me to not ground myself to understand that, I could only thrive within the system by standing equal and one to it, which meant ‘the end’ to all these airy-fairy dreams of art and a ‘free spirited’ life-creation.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to compare myself to my sister’s life and avoid at all cost becoming ‘like them,’ which meant the definition of having an ‘ordinary life,’ that till this day I see I have still judged as ‘ordinary’ and ‘boring’ and ‘constricting’ which are all aspects that come from this desire, want and need of myself to be ‘free’ and ‘unbound’ which is only a mindfuck of myself to perpetuate my own personality as ‘superior’ and ‘more intelligent’ – apparently – for deciding not to be bound to a relationship, a place, or even having desires to create a family and have kids – all of which was already quite ‘settled’ in my sister’s minds when they were my age.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience actual fear when writing about ‘creating a family’ because that is an aspect of ‘life’ that I ‘do not like talking about at all’ just because of how I have linked marriage, kids and family to being like a hell that I tried to escape through defining myself as/ becoming ‘an artist,’ and within such tag, making myself acceptable as the ‘eccentric one’ within my family = meaning ‘the one that would break the mold.’

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to actually future project myself with a partner living in a little house away from the city where he could play music, I could create art and have fun riding back and forth to the city to make money with art/ any other occupation and leave a ‘peaceful kind of life’ which became like this ‘dream’ in the back of my head that I almost get myself into fully right before I got to Desteni.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to believe that I could in no way follow my sisters’ steps in life, which meant studying a career, working for a while to make enough money to then settle into having kids and having a family, just because of all the judgments I created toward ‘creating a family’ and believing that to be the ultimate imprisonment for ‘a free spirited being like me.’ Lol

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to define myself and create my entire life as being ‘the antithesis of my sisters’ wherein I made sure that I would wear ‘the artist’s gown’ proudly, so that I could justify my actual fear to ever participate in the system of money as a regular being that has a stable job, that has a husband and kids, because that would mean the absolute ‘brainwashing type of life’ wherein I judged everyone that would follow dreams of success and money as ‘brainwashed,’ without realizing that I was doing the exact same thing, just veering to another direction but in the end: only seeking my personal heaven all the time in my ‘own particular way’ which became ‘my religion.’

 

I forgive myself to still hold on to the memory of my sister’s final exam in her uni where she was granted some honors that made everyone proud, and within that, thinking that I had to ‘top that’ which became this elusive comparison that I had to apparently ‘beat’ with my career just to remain within my self-belief of being ‘the most intelligent of my family’ that had a ‘promissory future,’ wherein the entire fear of failing at fulfilling such desire looms in the back of my head based on these future projections that I would participate in based in ‘making it’ within the art world.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to admire my sister because of having had a great final exam and great career development – then becoming disillusioned about her once that she had to quit her ‘kickass job’ because of following her desires to get married and have a kid, which was only confirming what ‘I was expecting of her,’ as self-righteous judgment that I used to fuel the idea that: ‘even if she was ‘great’ in her career, she won’t follow through with it, because her desires to have a family will be stronger than becoming successful in her career’ – and so it happened and I only fueled my self-righteous prognostic.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to take a position of superiority in comparison to my sisters wherein I have believed myself to be ‘more intelligent’ and ‘wiser’ because of not following the usual ideas of having a relationship and being planning to ‘settle down’ and getting the entire house/ marriage/ kids type of life which I have judged them for in the back of my head, without realizing that it was all based on me actually fearing having to face such a life because it meant having to stand in the system and have an ‘ordinary life’ of making money to ‘settle myself down’ the same way that they have done.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think ‘There is no way that I ‘m going to waste myself that way’ wherein I used my sisters as the example of everything that I did Not want to be/ become, still till this day seeing their lives as boring and dull, which is just a spiteful judgment and self-righteous to justify my actual fear of even considering myself living their lives of great responsibility now that they have children.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to actually fear and be petrified by the mere idea of having children.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define ‘support’ and a ‘supportive relationship’ that of someone that could agree with me whenever I would talk about ‘having an ordinary life’ as the worst thing one could ever do in a lifetime, and in that believing that whomever had ‘the same ideals in life’ was meant to be with me for the rest of my life, lol

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to actually veil myself from seeing that I was no different to my sisters/ anyone else in the world that plans a future with someone that can ‘agree’ with them and their ‘lifestyle’ which in essence comprises the same desires for happiness/ fulfillment/ satisfaction just the ‘means’ and ‘ways’ of obtaining that is what differs.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to believe that ‘I wasn’t born to be that way’ pointing out ‘the way’ as the path that my sisters/ what I deemed ‘regular people’ would follow through within their lives, wherein I would instead believe that I had this ‘special gift’ that I could use as a justification to not have to go through that ‘path in life’ of the ‘ordinary living conditions.’

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to believe that ‘my thing is to create and be with likeminded people,’ which is how I would deliberately seek to create relationships within ‘the artworld’ and through those relationships believe ourselves to be ‘superior’ than the rest of the world because of the entire self-brainwash of considering ‘arts’ as an evolutionary step within a human being, which is how I would justify my own denigration toward ‘the ordinary lives’ that people live, without ever realizing the type of life I was aiming at being no different to that of any other ‘regular person’ in the world, and that I was in fact only seeking to be also happy, fulfilled and having a partner in life that I could continue my ‘creative dreams’ with, which still till this day remained as some elusive ideal in my life.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to believe that the relationship that I had with that one person was absolutely ‘meant to be’ and it’s the relationship that has took me the most till this day to self-forgive and absolutely let go, because of all the dreams that I built around it for over half of my life – so, I realize that my dreams to be an artist were also based on wanting to be a special person that could be with this other ‘special person’ and be together in our ‘creative dreams’ wherein we could have art as the religion that binds us. This means that, within me realizing the religion I was following as ‘art,’ I am able to see with more clarity how I was structuring my life according to a single belief system that is no different to someone else’s wishes and desires to be ‘rich’ and famous, being absolutely religious in one way or another, or having knowledge as their ultimate ‘worth’ in themselves – art became that point that would bind my dreams and my relationship with the person that I had ‘dreamed’ about for a long time. Never ever questioning how come it had actually happened the exact same way I had envisioned it, and to what extent that relationship defined the entirety of ‘who I am’ and ‘what I want to be’ in the future.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to believe that ‘I could do this forever: creating and enjoying life’ which was part of the self-belief that I followed in order to continue my self-definition of being with this particular person in my life, and reinforcing ideas of not having to be making a living out of ‘bullshit’ in this world – wherein ‘bullshit’ meant anything Not related to art-creation/ performance, etc.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to think ‘What a better way to live life but to create!’ and in that, justifying my self-religion of seeking the ultimate satisfaction and relationship to others through that self-religion, as a way to not have to face the world system, remain in my happy-go-lucky artistic bubble with ‘likeminded people’ that I could simply use as a reinforcement to my own ‘decisions in life to be and become an artist,’ just because they were doing the same with their lives: trying to escape from themselves/ the world, feeling victimized from ‘the world system’ and wanting to create a safe haven outside of the city to just ‘be free, live and create,’ all of it just being a pipe dream, literally.

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to believe that I was genuinely happy at that time, which became just a mechanism of my mind to always take me back to those times/ memories as if I was genuinely happy and fulfilled, when in reality I was in the most self-suppressed state of being within a relationship that was not supportive at all and just using anything I could to not have to face myself, making myself co-dependent to another’s dreams and in that, make them ‘my own’ through association, due to the belief of art being a ‘savior’ in our lives, no different to any other religion.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to believe that I in no-way could do anything else than ‘art’ or any other artistic career like playing music, writing, photography and all these activities that seemed ‘acceptable’ as a profession in the world system, yet not fully being defined within my mind as the ‘ordinary type of career,’ which is how I came to justify my entire existence being based on ‘dream-fulfilling’ through art as a way to escape the world system.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to believe that I could remain drawing forever and be with people that would be also creative and be ‘happy together’ lol, which became just the usual way to justify my career my decision and ‘what I want to do with my life’ with this entire ‘feel good’ attitude to it. I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to establish my ideal life/ my idea of fun as being with someone else in a relationship wherein one could be playing music and I could be creating graphic art and fulfill our ‘creative dreams’ together, which is why I had a tendency to seek out for musicians lol – It’s an exorcism here so

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to deliberately seek out for musicians to establish a relationship with, because of the dream that I held oh so dearly as my ideal life wherein I could be ‘creating plastic/ visual arts’ and ‘he’ the ‘ideal partner’ could make the music for it, which became like this perfect future as the creative couple – just like many couples in the artworld that I sought to emulate – couples playing in bands, couples directing music videos, couples working in art-creation together.

 

Art Saves

Self Corrective Statements:

When and as I see myself believing that I could in no way take a regular job, I stop and I breathe – I realize that I am following my ‘self-religion’ as ‘the artist’ wherein I would justify my aversion to having to be In the system and have a regular income Within the system – thus I direct myself to equalize myself to the system wherein no matter what I do to earn money, I realize that the purpose of doing this is to support myself, to be In the system and to support an actual process of changing the way the world-system works which implies that I won’t only be in it for the mere sake of survival, but as an active participant to finally establish a world system wherein I/ we won’t have to depend on money any longer as a limit to what we want to be/ become in our lives, this implies that standing up for life in equality as a new monetary system will allow each person to express themselves in the way that they really want to live and exist as wherein money will no longer define what an ‘ordinary’ or ‘extraordinary’ life is based on the way that money is made to live/ survive in the world system.

 

When and as I see myself denigrating anyone that is currently living a life within the system and having what I had deemed as an ‘ordinary life,’ I stop and I breathe – I realize that this is the spitefulness that I bred in my mind in order to not have to face myself going through the actual equalization of myself as the system, which implies that I direct myself to simply focus on what I have to do and become in order to really stand Within the system, no longer defining it as following a dream/ deviating from a dream – but living decisions that are based in the common sensical steps required for each one of us to take Self-Responsibility for this world and do what we have to do to manifest it/ create it as a living-activity until it is done.

 

When and as I see myself ‘pondering’ what I would be doing if I had followed my dreams and all of the idealism I sought to fulfill in my life – I stop and I breathe – I realize that such ideas were simply pipe dreams that I used in order to not face myself, to not take Self-Responsibility – hence I stand as the decision that I’ve taken to support myself to exist as an individual that become part of the people that support themselves to let go of all limitations and fears to actually change the world from within and without through practically taking one point in our world as ‘our responsibility ‘and following through with it as a life commitment.

 

When and as I see myself judging people’s lives as ‘ordinary’ I stop and I breathe, I realize that I gave such definition in a derogatory way to believe that I was making the ‘right choices’ in life, based on preferences/ self-beliefs and ideas of me as an ‘artist’ being able to have an ‘eccentric unique life,’ an ‘extraordinary’ life, which is part of the programming embedded within society wherein an ‘artist’ is acceptable as ‘not normal’ based on societal patterns which is nothing else but another belief system in itself that in no way regards life in equality in/ as all living beings. I stop placing further tags upon life itself.

 

When and as I see myself silently judging marriage, families, having kids, and the act of ‘settling down,’ I stop and I breathe – I realize that I judged that as ‘ordinary’ and as the ‘locks of the system,’ based on me fearing standing one and equal as the system and actually fearing ever committing myself to such points in life, which I see that once I remove the fear and judgment to it, if and the point is here to be walked, I am willing to do so within the consideration of what is best for all life at all times and never in self-interest desires.

 

When and as I see myself fearing ‘settling down’ because of having the idea of always being and remaining a ‘free spirited person,’ I stop and I breathe – I realize that the career choice was based on me being able to perpetuate myself as a ‘free being,’ but never based on actual practical physical reality taking into consideration earning money/ working within the system, but my entire decision was based on dreams, preferences and desires which I’ve walked previously – thus I realize that the direction that I give to myself will be based on being able to have a stable income, a stable place wherein I can work in the most suitable position in order for me to be an active participant in the changes that we’ll be walking within the world system, wherein I ensure that I am no longer bound to dreams and desires of the past – and instead, ground myself (lol wrote moneyself) to have a stable financial position as that is the primary point within the world system, as well as establishing relationships of Self-Support in the physical and practical considerations and no longer based on desire, attraction, support of fellow belief-systems and personalities and ego.

 

When and as I see myself comparing my life to the one of my sisters and their decisions in life, I stop and I breathe – I realize that I am able to simply direct myself in the consideration of what’s best for all and not only trying to ‘step out of the family-mold’ which implies that I no longer resist walking any similar steps as all decision will be based on the point I’ll be walking in my reality which will be placing myself in the most suitable position in the world system to establish the necessary changes in the world in the consideration of Life in Equality – the measuring point for this will be cross referenced with people that I can get further perspectives on what is best for all whenever I see myself being stuck at making decision – yet being aware that whatever decision I take, will be walked in the name of Life itself – and never again my ego and personal desires.

 

When and as I see myself comparing the careers that my sisters’ have had – I stop and I breathe, I realize that such comparison stemmed from my desire to be ‘superior’ as ‘more intelligent’ within the family, which is all ego based – therefore I let go of my desire to end up being perceived as a ‘cunning’ person, but instead follow through with the necessary points to finish and walk the next steps in my life, preparing myself to place myself in the position that I will require to be in to support within this process of self-change into a world system based on Life in Equality.

 

When and as I see myself believing that I am ‘missing out on life’ being ‘life’ linked to my previous artistic endeavors, I stop and I breathe – I realize that I had linked my entire future to ‘being an artist’ and within that, having no regard to me becoming someone that would have even get to positions that I officially ‘loathed’ in terms of it all having to do with social and political management, which is what I am willing to be and become as well as the necessary education, because that’s the foundation of support for all humans beings to start considering Life in Equality – so, I realize that what I will be doing will be actively participating in the near future, within the education of myself and others within the principles of Life in Equality and structuring my life in away wherein I can ensure that all relationships that I establish are in direct accordance to this process, my life commitment first, and then to existence as a whole, which is standing as who I really am in all aspects of my life.

 

When and as I see myself being ‘unsatisfied’ and seeking happiness, I stop and I breathe. I realize that such happiness I had linked it to airy-fairy dreams of ‘creation’ that were in no way supportive, and only based on equally high-conversations that did not consider the practical living reality at all but were just literal pipe dreams that would only serve to our egos and our desire to not face ourselves, which is unacceptable – thus I support myself to remind myself of the commitment to life I’ve made and that won’t require to be a ‘constant reminder’ as when I am here as breath as life, there is no need to desire or ‘yearn’ for happiness or fulfillment – one simply walks the decision with no desire to experience something , but walks in self-responsibility as the correction to stop all the self-interest and desires that have been the building blocks of this current world-system that we are her to stop within and as ourselves and correct/ direct into a best for all outcome.

 

When and as I see myself looking at people as ‘potential partners’ based on what they do in life – placing preference to musicians – I stop and I breathe. I realize that I am falling into the egotistical pattern of ‘being an artist’ and in that already creating a preference of people over others – thus I commit myself to stop following my dreams and desires toward people based on ‘what they do,’ but instead support myself to establish agreements, relationships in all aspects within the consideration of what is best for all life – wherein no preference intervenes to place myself in the most suitable position within the world system to walk my decision to support myself and others equal and one within this process.

 

I let go of my art religion, because I see that this is the ‘real god’ I’ve worshipped the longest in my life and it had gone so inadvertently that it is like draining myself from my ‘safe haven’ – It had always been ‘here’ as something ‘in the background’ throughout my life, never wanting to admit that it was like this faith that I kept as myself, just like people keep ‘their god’ up there, as a faith that they can just hold on to as a point of resort and self-definition.

 

I breathe and realize I am here, and that letting go of all these dreams and ideas and future projections can only allow myself to become more self-directive in the decisions that I make from here on in my life, wherein I won’t allow myself to seek out a relationship based on any artistic bond or desires to ‘create’ and ‘be happy’ – but instead take into consideration the actual ‘facing’ of the world system that requires our absolute self-responsibility to practically and physically establish solutions wherein we stop for a moment seeking only our self-interested futures and instead create/ build a future that is best for all.

 

 

No es mi sisema 05

No es mi sistema 2005 (It’s not my system)

This is an allusion of how I saw the world as ‘too corrupted’ for my pure beating heart  – instead of realizing I was IT as well. I face the system as myself without wanting to remain in a separate bubble of dreams – I am the only one that can save myself.

 

Blogs:

 

These interviews supported me to realize what  ‘my religion’ was linked to money as the ultimate experience


67. Money = Function of Abuse

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see money itself as the product of our own insanity wherein disease as inequality is spread every single moment that I use money as something that is not readily given and/ or available for all living beings, without realizing that I have been the only one that could have ever created such rules and regulations that money currently exists as, which makes me equally responsible for the insanity that is currently going on in the world and that I carry as a means of protection from such ‘insanity’ in the world.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed money as a social institution wherein people that are able to understand the meaning of money, will automatically associate this with power, desire, positive experience and ‘the sum of all desires’ because we have neglected to give each other life in equality as a living right – from birth to death- to which we then comply that the ‘rules’ are: we can only get money if we work for it, if we inherit it, if we ‘win’ it one way or another, in this reducing Life to a single experience that must be Earned and is not readily given.

 

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to realize that money as symbol of power can only exist in the dishonesty that we have accepted and allowed as ourselves in separation of all life recognized as one and equal as who we really are.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that because we have a ‘monetary system,’ that ‘system’ will work in a mint and adequate way to support beings, which is and has never been real and a fact, due to this system having its preplanned ‘flaws’ to only support a small sector of the entire world’s population, which means that such system that we have all collectively agreed upon, is based upon abuse, disregard of fellow human beings and in that, ‘making money’ out of something that has never had any actual ‘price tag’ as an inherent nature – which means that Money is Never pointing out to an actual natural association of ‘worth/ value’ of this physical reality and the value money represents, which means: we have just been playing the most evil game in existence through and as the monetary system, wherein we’ve imposed numbers as ‘price tags’ upon reality/ the Earth’s resources to our own benefit and deliberately affecting all that have No-Money in a negative way, which means that anyone of us that has money is directly responsible for the suffering, starvation, poverty, lack of proper living conditions of any other living being that has No equal-power as money in this world.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that money can fluctuate according to ‘market forces,’ which is in itself an obvious indication that it is Not a Real-Physical consideration of Life, as Life as the physical reality, as the resources and ecosystem is predictable, is stable, is cyclic and works in symbiotic relationships, which is the ecosystem we live in – yet because we have blinded ourselves by Monetary-values, we have become oblivious to the basic common sense indication that any variation of prices/ worth of things Is manipulation, is control and managed by a few that seek power/ control over others, which all of us having money tacitly and implicitly agree upon.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see money as ‘power in itself’ wherein the single view of paper, coins, metals called ‘precious’ have made us gone Mental in terms of the value and worth of life itself reduced to a system of symbols (money as paper/ the sign $/ metals/ bank notes/ shares) that indicate the ‘wealth’ that a being is able to possess, which implies an obvious relationship of control and domination over Life itself. Thus I realize that the crime against life is committed every single day and every single moment that I use money as a way to give and receive what is here of this Earth, which – because of money – not everyone has equal-access to.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that money inevitably is a representation of physical things that I can ‘acquire’ with it, which blinds me from the primary step of realizing how such possibility of acquisition can ONLY exist if I hold such ‘money’ in my ‘power’/ hands, which implies that I am deliberately participating in a system where I know beforehand that Not everyone has the same ‘power at hand’ or power at all – no money at all – to live, which makes me equally responsible for having complied to the rules and regulations of a system designed to only support a Few in humanity, while deliberately enslaving the rest in order to have them be the actual work-force that strives to get the same money that those that made the rules/ own the monetary system, are able to establish to continue and perpetuate their power in this reality, which I have equally accepted and allowed as ‘normal’ in this world.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become jaded to the arbitrariness of money and its rules, wherein there is no direct link of money as life/ money as given to all in equality in order to make of money an actual Tool to Live – but instead money exists as a weapon of choice that we have agreed upon as a means to control, divide and deliberately maim being’s ability to live, which makes me see and realize that poverty, starvation, crime, lack of proper living conditions for all human beings stems from my tacitly and implied acceptance and participation in a system of abuse as the monetary system we have running within a capitalist system of Money as a life-controlling system.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to neglect the fact that there is no Natural or ‘Divine’ reason to link money to power over life, and that this is a man-made system that has used this sign of Money as a way to motivate greed, power, control and instigate the desire to be ‘more’ as that positive experience that we are all taught to embed onto money itself, wherein we go through our lives having ‘money’ as the single goal in our existence, which we cover-up and ‘make-up’ with words like love, happiness, bliss, health, prosperity, abundance which are all only able to be Lived IF there is Money to acquire/ get all of that which produces us an experience in this world as that positivity that we ‘live for’ currently in our world, because it has never been readily given as a living-right.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make of Money as the ability to Live and Experience, the Meaning of Life, which implies that I have never in fact Lived as I have only Lived-to-Survive, Live-To-Get-Money, Live-to-Subsist against all odds as the inevitable and inherent competition to survive is entailed when and while knowing that money is not readily given to all in equality, but must be ‘fought for’ and strived-for, while neglecting that everything that I require is from the Earth and the Earth gives it unconditionally, which means that I am accepting and allowing a system of control and abuse as ‘power over life’ without ever questioning Why it is so – never getting to the bottom of the fact which is: it is an arbitrary system that was deliberately created to separate, divide and conquer humanity in the name of power for a few.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Believe that: because we have already set this system of rules and regulations that make the current monetary system, I cannot change those rules even at the face of the blatant realization that this system is simply Not working, Not functional to support everyone – which implies that believing that I can’t change it is accepting a divine force-like behind the creation of money, which is not so at all, it is just a scheme of values that we made in order to create a positive experience for some and a negative experience-reality for the majority, as that is the only way that the ‘more than’ experience for only a few can be obtained.

 

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to realize how it is within this premise of the existence of Money as a positive experience, that I am in fact perpetuating the system of abuse every single time that I wish to ‘have money’ and be a ‘millionaire’ and ‘billionaire’ which are concepts instigating the propagation of abuse as a ‘positive thing’ in our reality, wherein the amount of money is linked to ‘freedom’ and ‘freedom of choice’ and absolute liberty to do ‘whatever we want,’ yet ignoring deliberately how everything that we buy is currently linked to a system of abuse wherein no matter what we do, where we buy, how much money we have: we are all equally participants in this chain-massacre of abuse toward life as the current monetary system.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to agree that money as a concept and word itself signifies a positive experience within me, wherein I know that having money implies = being able to live and get what I required, want and desire wherein the escalation of basic needs to desires implies an added value to things that are not indispensable in my reality – called ‘luxuries’- wherein the idea of being a ‘millionaire’ is accepted in our society as something ‘possible’ without placing 1+1=2 together, wherein there are billions of people that are Not having any access to money at all, yet we have people that have more than One million (money of the greatest worth) as their personal wealth, which implies that there is Obvious abuse being allowed in such concept, yet we praise them as ‘examples’ of what we all want to ‘be one day,’ wherein being a millionaire has become part of our social agreement as a possibility in a capitalist system wherein wealth is seen as something ‘positive’ and denoting ‘success’ – without ever questioning what is the chain massacre of abusive acts that allow One/ a few beings on Earth being entitled with such noun: millionaire/ billionaire – neglecting the life that must be used/ abused to get to such fallacious concept as ‘power’ that can only exist in abuse of human beings, animals and natural resources that are able to be exploited to be Sold and capitalized through the profit system that we have all bound ourselves to.

 

I commit myself to educate myself on how we have accepted words as our very own prison wherein each sign/ word as part of a system indicates our level of separation, due to not equating both the signifier and signified as one and equal as myself, as life, but have placed life upon system of arbitrary values that are man-made in order to abuse. This means that I commit myself to show and reveal that it is through purifying words as ourselves that we can get to the realization of how we have become the very words of abuse as a ‘normalcy’ in society/ the world-system, without ever questioning what we are implying by the mere use of Money as a sign of power.

 

I commit myself to walk my own positive associations with money as a positive experience, which I see and realize is part of the necessary ‘motivation-factors’ that we agree upon in order to view money as a ‘positive thing’ that will lead us to prosperity, abundance, joy, happiness, fulfillment at a PERSONAL level, wherein the totality as humanity is neglected/ not equated within that ‘motivation’ because of deliberately leaving 2/3 of the world’s population out of the Money-game that only a select few are able to participate in, which already implies that we Must Take Self-Responsibility for changing, correcting and establishing New-Rules in the Game that consider All Beings in Equality.

 

I commit myself to continue walking my process of seeing who/what I am within the experience that I have accepted and allowed myself to be and become within the use of particular words that stand in separation of myself as Life.

 

Equal Money System 

 

Desteni Forum for Self Support to walk a process of Self-Forgiveness to see who we are as the words we speak, and how to establish common sense without our day to day living wherein the Equalization of ourselves as the value-of-life /the only value that can exist is practically lived/ applied in our day to day living reality.

Read our Journey to Life blogs and walk with us!

Money Driven

Money Driven (2003)

 

Read: Economist’s Journey to Life 

Basics on Equal Money:

What the FAQ is an Equal Money System – Volume 1

 

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